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The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920, July 22, 1916, EXTRA, Image 10

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162SSJ&&SR
>itw T*r Mrrtor. If ««**.•
■|Jf3uM*M*r- By *—**■ R* r THr ' p*y* *•
itlrw
Te!«ohon»—Main 4120, eoan*ctln» »11 <**r*rt
ia Qtf| Tim**' oparfctor own* of d«ptrtm#nt
M aanoa wanted. Subscription order* or com
»|*JnU ot Irregular ddlnrr may be r»c»l»*il by
phono up to • p. m-
Entered at the Foetofflc# at Detroit a* eecond
lUM mU matter.
The uaa of the name of thta corporation an 1
Hi officers In any outald* project to uneutt. »•
Lgj accredited business representstiv re
Zrry and should be required to *h. w crcden-
Sada signed by Richard W R-adin*. bualrea#

SATURDAY. JULY 22. 101«
“Youngster. you don't know what if it to hr
tpMAouf a family, without a home, without a
country, dad if you ore ever tempted to toy a
word nr do a thing that that! put a bar between
you end your family, your home and your
country, pray God in His mrr<~y to take y>u that
instant home to His own heaz'en Ftick by your
family, boy; forget that you have a tel' while
you do ererythtng for them Jhink of your home,
hoy: write and send and talk about if Let u be
poorer to your thought the tarthe* y"t» have t ■
'travel from it; and n<sA so if when yon are f ree
4*4 for your country, hoy. act or dream a drear
hut of sorving her at she bidt you, though fhof
CCrvice curry you through a thousand hells So
mottor what happens to you. a*, matter uho
ftoiters you or who abuses you, never look at
weather flag, never let a night past bas you pray
God to bless the Stars and Stripes. Remember
that you belong to your own country at you
belong to your own mother; stand by her at you
would stand by your own mother." —Edward
Everett Hale.
The Man-Eating Shark,
Terror to Bathers, and Also
A. Shark, Land Lubber! |
Mao-eating sharks have killed four
parsons and injured many in the seaside
East.
This section of the country is engaged
now, principally, in shark hunting, be
cause human lives are at stake, because
the popularity of bathing is threatened
and because the capital invested by re
sort owners is endangered.
Even the matter of hunting down and
Irfltinf man-eating sharks has, you will
obeerva, its practical side.
There are a lot of resorts in the sea
•ttt East that wouldn’t last very long
waft it not for the health-giving and in
vigorating sport of bathing and riding
the etean rollers, and well anybody
4own that way knows it, which accounts
for the fact that everybody whose
means and livelihood are threatened, is
a part in the shark hunting.
Several of the monsters have been
conquered and dragged out on the sands
as trophies of the hunt, and many more
will meet a like fate.
It U going to be tough on these
fthtrks, because all who are engaged in
the hunt have a common purpose.
Could the people always be found in
a common purpose against their enemies,
thicker among them in society than
man-eating sharks are among bathers in
the ocear, a lot of problems which
years have failed to solve would have
been solved long ago.
A common purpose is a great thing.
This conclusion came to us once with
much force when we saw a team of
great, strong horses making no progress
with its load because one of the horses
had balked, and the other couldn’t pull
both the load and its mate.
This is the first time that man-eating
sharks have been known to come into
the shallow shore waters, and many
theories are advanced to explain their
presence.
Explanation, however, is the easiest
thing in the world.
These sharks are found in shallow
water tor the same reason that you are
found <ti the dinner table.
They have come to shore because they
are hungry.
They haven’t come to spawn because
they do not spawn in shallow water, or
they would have been found in shallow
water before.
Their food out in the deep has bees
supplied from steamers crossing the
oeean. They live on the refuse from
these boats.
The war has cleared the ocean, prac
tically, of steamers,
The sharks have been forced nearer to
abort and they are mighty hungry on
reaching shone,
_______
~iß|Mhs»ls Ipr themM A- Shark,
land lubber, would term “good picking.’
There is positively not a bit of differ
ence In sharks in this respect, whether
they seek their prey in the depths of the
ocean or high and dry on land.
Therefore, the presence anywhere of
A. Shark, land lubber, and man-bilking
land lubber, who lives on society’s fish, is
also easily explained.
You will find A. Shark where those
charged with the responsibility of en
forcing the laws passed for the protec
tion of people are lax and fail to dis
charge this responsibility.
You will find him where laws passed
to make newspaper advertising safe are
not enforced by those whose duty :t is to
enforce them.
You will find him where newspapers
do not care what kind of advertising
they take from sharks, no matter if tak
ing the advertising be against either the
spirit or the letter of the law.
How easily the man-eating shark
, scare in the seaside Fast could be taken
care of if it were possible to stretch a
net that would protect the bathing
beaches, and how quickly the resort pro
prietors, from practical motive, would
have a net stretched.
It would be the easiest thing in the
world to stretch a net that would offer
protection for the public against A.
; Shark, land lubber, looking for “good
picking.”
ALL newspapers, working in a com
mon purpose, would have to refuse,
simply, to let A. Shark’s advertising get
into their columns.
Such concerted action on the part of
newspapers would simply be the dis
! charge of their DUTY to their readers.
And Mr. A. Shark would be found
where he was never known to be before
i —at work.
Man-eating and ley-eating sharks are
too numerous to mention; but it is worth
: while to call attention to one right now.
Seductive cigarette ads are filling the
pages of newspapers that don't care.
“They satisfy! They satisfy!” is the
! persuasive cry accompanying the pictorial
allurement.
In other words, come on in boys! the
cigarette plunging is fine! There is sen
suous languor and sweet content in this
summer sea of indulgence.
And once in, the Shark gets them.
They are fortunate if it is no more than
an arm or a leg that they lose, to leave
them crippled in the race of life.
Often they are consumed, body and
soul, by this insidious monster.
From Another Point ot view
b u C. T. i>.
The consensus of opinion yesterday, as
we passed amonjf our friends, was that it
was somewhat cooler.
* » *
Maud Muller, on a summer's day.
Raked the meadow rich With b«tv
As w*. changed to pass »ha’ wrr
Queried we of Maudie. “Say
Why are you out rakirg hay?
Where’s your old mar. 1
Tell us. pray ”
Toward the house sb* ooked away,
"Sleeps,” said she. ’he .ve-Jong day”
He was also in the hay
Detroit bid* fair to .set a record this
summer in suicides. Then think of those
who may be waiting fe then to get the
bridge built.
• V •
Noticed the tendency to white duck
trousers since Wilson was here in hie ?
The idea is, of course, there are a few
too many of us for the presidency to he
passed around, but not so with " hitc*
duck trousers.
• • •
A Detroit moving picture theater ha*
gone into bankruptcy, because, we sur
mise, not enough people went into this
particular moving picture theater.
• * •
Ry the way- was Hamlet's ghost in the
movie business at the time of remark
ing: “I could a tale unfold?”
• • •
We fell to wondering.
We had Charles K. Hughes in mind.
We thought of him as governor of New
York.
And then we thought of him as Justice
of the supreme court.
High position, we reflected, has no
doubt given him self control.
Hut we fell to v ondering Just how he
will take on July 31, whtm they step up
and tel! him that he has been nominated
for president
• * •
New Yota is 1,400 chorus gin* shy.
Think of Neu Y’ork l>eing cnorus giri
shy.
• • •
They have arrested a burglar in lies
Moines by the name of OfTt. In the stilly
night.
• • •
If you can grow an elephant’s ear from
a bulb, why not a pig’s hock, in with the
cabbage.
• • •
It deveiona that the Deutechland land
ed frere with potash. Ptjpr pcrlmutter.
DETROIT TIMES
The Man With the Wooden Leu: Comes Into His Own.—By Webster.
✓■— * “ ' ( w *>H I KHtW WAirTK.K^
*«er err aTH \ .1 « 105- rr UP Here * '
v -•* l J
XV \ FuT-nn MV Bovine** / J
1 umr or „ •
er e Ry. ACCiPEhT ' p_
j {CopwigtM Ibtft. by H T Webster )
YOUR EVENINGS.
BY H. ADDINGTON BRUCE
Author ? The R.d Ur of "F’syphology and F'arenthood. ' etc
When the day* work Is don*,
when vou have reached horn*,
washed tip. and had your supper,
just how do you spend your even
ing* *
This Is an Important question, as j
you will appreciate on a moment’s j
•tough* The wav a, man spends
h:« evenings has much to do with
his health and his succee, in life.
A-.d unfortunately many men—and
women too —spend their evenings in
such fashion as to injure their j
health and ihatter their possibilities
of sueces*.
I do not refer particularly to those
unhappy people whose evenings are :
spent In reckless dissipation It is
easy enough to foretell what the
future holds In store for them.
The people I have in mind are. j
rather well-intentioned, clean-mind
ed folk, who do not dissipate, yet in '
on* way or another spend their
evenings unwiseiy.
They form a lamentably numer- ,
ous class. Conspicuous among tnem
are the people who ins!** on r*»um- j
In* in the evening the work at i
which they have been engaged dur- !
ins the day.
Or. if they do cot actually resume |
the werk itself, they ,;end ’heir
evenings thinking about it, ponder
Ing problems connected with it
Which, if anything, is worse than
actually working night after night
Occasional night work will do no- i
Vxiv any harm. But to take one’s
work home every evening, whether ;
literally or figuratively, is about as
unwise a thing as anybody can do.
People who dO th’.S grudge even
•he time ’ha* every one ought to de
vote to ’he evening newspaper They
are impatient to *e* their mind*
bulling with thoughts ’hat they
ought to have left behind at oiTVre,
•tore, or factory.
The*# pre-ernlnen’ly are the peo
ple who »oon or lat* puffer from
sleeplessness, indication, and oth-»r
•ymptnms of extreme r.ervousr.*-*
They Just ie truly wreck :h#-!r health
a* do th* on* 1 * who dissipate
Almost equally erroneous la the
policy port ;*d hy many of seeking
an-j«<*ment sway from home every
evening They cannot remain con
•ert’edly by their own flreald* a
*!r,r> evening, b’it must rush or ‘o
a dance, a theatrical cn’ertalnir.er.t
I or a moving picture ,«how
This sort of thing does not
the energies aa seriously a* do*«
*ev»ial or alcoholic disslpa'ton. But
it. doe a unf.' those addicted to it,
i gtvlng them a wrong outlook on Hf»
| and weakening »he < opacity, to do
food work
The !ao.g of a tiny up of wa**r
may mean your baby's death*
, Mother* seen. to
aa often a-*
gwg'-ua weed h of
July when tiny infant* bavj to
fight ao hard for life
Nursing babies get especially
, thlraty in hot »earh*r They should
be given plenty <4 cooled boiled
ter to drink
I)o not give it Just before feeding
time, however, unless ordered by
the doctor.
Give it between feeding"
Too often when bahy crl*-* the
mother hastens to put it to the
breast or to glre It the nursing j
The Keep Well Column
WATER.
On the other hand, to remain at j
home evening after evening Is it- j
self an error
Some recreation aw*y from home
everybody ought to have An even
ing at the theater on*’* In *
while, an evening at some social
gathering, is of value if only in the
way of bringtng variety into a per ,
son’s life.
And this, in truth, is a fundam*n
tal rule to be observed by ail who
would profit from 'heir evening free
dom as everybody should.
Whatever else you do, do not
spend your evenings in the same
way evening after evening
Don’t do night work habitually, j
don’t seek your amusement habitual
ly away from home, don’t habitually
hue the hearth
Vary thtng* Work a night or so i
If your needs must. More frequent
ly occupy yourself during the even
tne with torn* developmental study
not directly connected with your
work Occasionally get out among
frienda. go to an amusing play, etc
Have friend* In to spend an oc
casional evening with you But
don’t let yourself become dependent
for amusements on friends Culti
vate inner resources
'Times Plea.*ed Thounands
to fk* Editor of The Times;
Permit me to thank you moat
hear’lly, on behalf of all those in
tereeted in the success of the
World * Salesmanship congress, for
the publicity which you kindly gave
to the discussions and addresses In
The Times.
! am able to Inform you that your
generous co-operation was sincere
ly appreciated and openly discussed
with frank prats* by many of those
lr. attendance at the congress, and I
can assure you that your silling
net* to help spread Information
about this big morement for “the
be'r*rm*n f of business through the
betterment, of salesmanship.'* has
indelibly impressed a memory of
The Times upon the minds of the
thousands of business men who will
| look tack with great gratification
i *o all *he different item* eotncident
with »he founding of the first
World's Salesmanship congress
With all good wishsa.
Sincerely.
D. M RARTUrTT
fDetroit, July 30, ISIS
Most people are good nurses when
I’ cornea to nursing animosity
bottle This Is wrong for two rea
First, in many casee baby Is
c*ily tryiag -ecause U wants a drink
of water and not a meal flecrmdly,
this practice severally results In
ovsrfaedlng of baby. Overfed babies
»*e the ones moet tfkeiy to faf! stek
during the summer months
e tlines the doctor orders bar
it v or oatmeal water for baby When
»0 r h la the cava, prepare as fol
lows;
Add two tablespoonfols of washed
e*«rl barley or of oatmeal as the
c* -e may be. to a quart of cold *a
•*r 801 l this down to a pint, cook
leg slowly for about two hours
Then strain while hot and add a
sufficient quantity of cold boiled
wafer to make a quart of the fluid
Keep eool in n covered Jar.
Pfrong. well babies mean strong
i wen children.
Let the People
Rule—and Write
Say* Strike Ballot la Secret.
To t\o E'htor of T h r Ti’n^l
Tn tfar Is? 1 ;* of Tfc** tinder
date of July 17. r>n tfce editorial
pa*e I notice an which deal*
with the demands of the tr;»tn and
enidnenien for an eight hour day.
entitled "A Growing Autocracy"
Pleaee allow rne apace to make a
few correctiona and r*»tn*rk*
It is a f a'ed that "the officers of
the Brotherhood of Railroad Train
men are d>tr.< < verythlr.g pomible
to obtain an afflrma’lvc rote' • • •
and that the membership are
obliged to rote In the presence of
the commt'tee chairman and with
out diacusstng any of the qneetlon
Involved."
This atatement Is erroneona Aa
a matter of fact, the ballot la j
handled **rlct!y "Australian." It
contain* In derail the res :lt of 1»
days negotia'.ons between 'he con
committee of nian.*gere rep
resenting the railroad* In the United
Spates ar.d the organizations repre
senting the 'rain and englneru*n.
from June i to June 15, an! is
handed to each man together with
a plain envelop**. The men have
ample time 'o carefully read the
ballot ar.d have 'he right to a»k any
questions they wish on the subject
They exercise th*lr nsn sweet will
as to the way they rote \fter they
vote, they put the ballot Info the
envelope*. «eal them and hand them
to the person author /* and to take |
the vote The r*f.i;lT of the vote t*
not known and w..l not !>*• known
until the m*e |* oa:.va~-»d In New
York on Aug 1
It la not reasonable to suppose
that the organization* d**Mre to ob
tain an affirm '.’e vno’ I* there
anything un An r'.can about >hat?
The article f irTher s'atn-< "the
ballot gives no separate opportunity
of voting for or against arbltra
) tlon " In 'he priming of this bal
lot th*» < ig<nl r law* were followed
out very cln.ely, con«e-quently the
ballot la a 'horoughbred, no whine
ior swine in It It brings to the sur
faro a clear ei|t l«*ue epher for or
against the principle of an eight
hour day
The form of arbitration an offered
by th* railroad*, ha* the unmf
s’atus u John l>w would have auk
inn the groceryman at the end ot
the month to arbitral hi* hill which
ha* accumulated during the month.
The train and »-nglnemen **and In
the same relation with the railroad*
a* the kto* ery man doe* to John
f>oe. In other word* the railroad*
have been tiuylng a lot of oitr tune
for a good many year* and they
have only half paid for If. and they
now want ns to arbitrate the bill.
Since It ha* become universally
recognized that capital i* but the
fruit of labor arrd could never have
existed had labor not flrai existed,
the laboring man of fhl* country, a*
wall a* foreign countries, i* Bitting
up and taking notire of the rapid
rata that millionaire* nr* being
turned out. Therefore, la it not to
ba supposed that all classes of la
boring men are going to *tand pat
for an eight-hour day. which I* only
g human dan.and This movement
la on It* way. It l* in the air and
bound to roma, and when the stam
pede Mart*. It will clear the track,
a* It will run over any man or class
of men who stand In the way
c O CAMPOKI.It.
c.halrraar.
No 72* I ave
July 19. If« 10
M*mma Johnny#’didn't I fell you
the other day never to let me hear
of you playing with those naughty
little toy* again?
Small Johnny Ye*, mamma; but
don't blame me if you heard It. I
didn't tell you.
SATURDAY* JULY 22* 1916
j The Daily Reminder (
TODAY'S AJXNIVERAARJE*
1518—British and *lll#*. under the
Puke of Wellington, totally defeated
the French near Salamanca. Spain
1 841 Amheret college conferred
the degree of on John Tyler,
preaident of the United Atetee
1151— A law prohibiting the sale of
liquor In Boston went fnto effect
111*—John A Roebllng. designer
of the Brooklyn bridge, died In
Hrocklyn. Born In Prussia June 12.
I*ol.
’B7o—Prussian* blew up Kehl
brldga, the Are* act of the Franco.
Trussian war
1171 —The Earl of Beaconefleld w*s
Invested with the order of the gar
ter by Queen Victoria.
1110—Abdul Rahman Kahn was
f rmally recognised as Ameer of Af
ghanlvtan.
I*ol—Prtncw of Naples (now King
of Italy) vtelted Queen Victoria In
London
l*o6 —Oeorge W. Jonaa first United
Ftatra senator from lowa, died at
Dubuqoa, Ta Born at Vlncennea Ind .
April lft, 100A
lIJT—A statue of Qen. John A. Lo
gan was utrreilod tn Lake Trent
park. Chicago.
I**l—Xllbu Boot became secretary
of war. succeeding Rneeell A. Alger.
I*o*—Prince of Wales (now King
George V.) arrived at Quebec for the
tercentenary celebration
OKI TKAK AGO TODAY !■ THE
WAR
Berlin reported progreee tn the
Ocrmen advance toward Riga.
Terrible massacres of Armenian*
br Turk* reported.
French oceenied file nimmlt of
the t-lnge. dominating the Ferht val
lev in tn* Voegea north of Muenetcr
Russian* hard pressed around
Warsaw, bet appeared to have check
ed the Germane on the west and
north
TODAY"** Emm DATS
Blehop John C. Kllgo of the Me»h
--o llst Episcopal church. south. h >rn
at Laurens, A C. *8 year* ago todav
fly see* R Orant. Jr- eon of th»
late President Orant bom at Hethei
84 years ago today
T c**ph Brletow former United
‘-!a*e» senator from Kansas born 'n
ife county. Ky, *5 years ago to
day
Sarah J. Parmer, fonnder of the
tsd Green Acre *«> '*! and re
! Tic*i* center at rilot. Me, ho rn at
Dover N H 85 years aro todav
James Kpever. head f the \'«w
Torh hanking Arm that hears hi*
name horn in New York city 5' rears
ego today
George Gtbeon. catcher of the
'''ttshMrgh Vat'ona’ )e*« i# baseball
•e*m born at London. Ont . >4 years
as- toda%
Flo-er Kne»*er pitcher for the On.
cinnati National league haschall
team born at Garrick. Pa. 5* year*
ago today
A Poem a Day
THE OLD ROAD TO P A RADMf
<>jr* Is a dark Fa*tertlde. and a
scarlet spring
But high up at Hcavan's gate all the |
saints etng.
Glad for the great companies return
ing to their King!
Oh tn rou'h the dawn's a ro»e. du»k
an amethvet.
All the roads from dusk to dawn 1
**» they wind and twill.
The o'd road to Paradise, easy It !»
missed'
But out tn sh» wet battlefield* fee i
the roadways wmd
One t-> grl«f, on» to death —no road
that a kind—
The »ld road to Paradise, plain It Is i
to find
Ft Ms’tln In hi* GoloneP* cloak
Ht Joan In her mall.
King David with hi# crown »nd
sword oh. none there be that fall j
AJor.g the road to Paradise they
Stand to greet and halt’
TVher*. the lark * a terror thing morn
x hope doijPt tossed.
i It here the lads lie thinking long out
i In rain and frost.
Where th«r And their <!<>d again, long
ag 1 they lost.
Where the eight comes cruelly,
where the hurt men moan.
Where the crushed forgotten ones
whisper pravers alone.
I hr st «! ng the battlefields come* to
Iced his own
Foul* that would have withered soon
In the world's hot glare.
Blown snd gone like *brive;*d things
dusty on the air
Bank on rank they follow him. voting
and *trong snd fair'
j Gur* Is a sad Ka*t*rt!de and a w «•
ful day.
Yet high up at Heaven’* gate the
satn's are all gav.
For the old read to Paradise ’tf* a
main traveled way'
Margaret Widdemer In the Craft*
man.
Pointed Paragraphs
Conceited women are seldom )e*i
ou*.
I.ike attract* like; *n empty purse
usually goes w|*h an empty *tom
arh.
If a girl knew how pretty she
doesn't look when she cries, she
wouldn't do It
A pig has as much use for a tail
aa a man has for two buttons on
the back of his frock coat.
If a man ever wishes he had
been horn a woman It Is when he
obaervea the foollih acts of other
men.
When a man doea a fool thing
that get* him Into trouble he Is
sure to say that "accident* will hap
pen.”
Nothing is calculated to jar a
pretty girl like the maamltne atten
tlons bos towed upon another girl
who 1* homely.
I.ltlle Uorothy- This paper says
they are not going to build any mor*
skyscrapers. What Is a skyscraper,
anyway?
Small Sanamle— Ob, a skyscraper
la a machine the weather man use*
to scrape the clouds off the sky.
Th« Old Gardener Says
Torch and window boies often
begin to look shabby at thlstlms
of year, simply because the ■tip
ply of plant food In the aoll ha*
been largely exhausted From
now on an application of manure
water should he made once or
twice each week, but the liquid
must first be diluted until It Is
about the color of weak tea A
little pulverized sheep manure
from the seed store will serve
for making this simple hut high
ly effective fertiliser Some
commercial humus spread over
the top of the box will also help
THE REAL TRUTH.
* BY OR. FRANK CRANE
(Copyright, 1916, l.y Kmrk Crane)
The real truth about a mania not
merely the bald facts, but includes all
that is thought, said, and felt aliout him.
Every once in awhile some industrious
biographer goes through all the data
that have accumulated concerning some
historic figure and, sifting it down, pro
duces a little handful of verified facta,
proudly proclaiming that here ia “the
real Washington, the real Carlyle, the
real Napoleon,” and so on.
We deny his boast. A man is as much
entitled to the rumors he has created as
to his other achievements. The diffused
light on a cloudy day, and even the pale
silver of moonshine, is as really sunlight
as are the direct rays of a summer
moon.
A man has a right to his penumbra.
An actor has a right to the curiosity
he has aroused.
A nation has a right to its traditions
as well as to its history.
Brussiloff has a right to the terror of
his name. So has Jess Willard.
A business concern very justly values
its “grHwi will” at so much.
Nothing succeeds like success, because
a man's success builds a platform for him
on which he stands to higher advantage.
If this were not so one’s life would
have no cumulative power, no initiative,
j He would have to begin anew every day.
He would make no progress, but go ever
lastingly around in a circle, like a dog
chasing its tail .
If Mark Twain were alive today he
w'ould not have to try to be funny. Even
at his most casual remark about the
weather we should all explode in peals
j of laughter.
Personality is not bounded by one’s
skin. It is an invisible, electrical some
what that permeates the atmosphere.
The real Thomas Edison. J. P. Morgan,
W. J. Bryan, W. I). Howells, and General
Funston are vast shadowy masses, made
up of the tenuous molecules of influence,
pervading the whole I ni ted States.
None is wholly self-made. His friends
help make him; so do his enemies; so do
Pan and Mercury and Puck; and the
three wire-pulling ladies, Clotho, Lach
esis, and Atropos.
So, great, creative souls form
j “schools.” for the only real school is in
getting a touch of another’s personality.
Not only imitators, but those who absorb
his -piri t and reproduce and propagate it.
When a great man has lived, the world
can never again be the same.
Goethe is a flowing fountain, watering
wide pastures. I Leonardo, Raphael,
I Giorgione—it was not so much what
they did as the spirit they let loose on
the earth. The real Lincoln is more alive
• tiwlay. moulding American ideals, than
he was in IX6O.
Do not talk of luck in fame. Fame has
} its laws severe as anything in Euclid.
There is no effect without adequate
j cause.
Thin la whnt Pater refers to as the
vraie verite (the true truth), “by which
the French recognize those more liberal
and durable impressions which, in re
spect to any considerable person, and
one who has at all intricately occupied
men’s attention, lie beyond, and must
supplement, the narrower range of the
strictly ascertained facts about him.
A man’s foot or nose is not so much a
part of him as is his reputation.
Hot? Huh!
So you think If. hot. do you. with your Ilf I"
90 nr !*. r > degrees, nnd your electric fans and
(, *WHMf7oi' n thlnk It's hos, what do you think
th’o militia hoys down along the lower Rio
(irandc are thinking about THKIH climate.
There thev have dust storms every evening,
and no electric fans; 100 to 110 degrees in the
sun, and very I k shade; sweaty garments
that stick and Itch, and nnrv a hath tub.
Ts TMKY ar* 1 brought back to this compara
tive summer resort, they’d call for their winter
Hn Sor»r* r, l!«it la « comparative thing, any
wav. and It Isn't hot unless you think It Is.
So think It lsn’l!
BAD BOTH WAVS.
Charles’ mother was reproving him for not
being more tidy about his hair, when his uncle,
who whs very bald, thinking to soothe his feel
ing*. said: ...
"Charles, don’t you wish you were ,-»« bald
a* 1? Then you wouldn't have any hair to
r °charle* heaved a long sigh of resignation
"No I don't.’* he said. ' There would he that
much more r*ee to wash" ladles' Home Jout
nak* •
editor s response.
"I have written a poem on —” The editor
looked up wearily. The blue eyed blonde young
woman wa* merciless "I have written a poetu
on ‘The Old Red Barn on the Farm.' and—"
The weary look disappeared from the editor's
face. "Ah! Delighted! Written on th« old
red barn, eh’ Fine' 111 he going along by the
farm In a day or so, and I’ll atop at the old red
j barn and read It.”
CONCEITED.
Well, h« thinks he understands the German
pnd Mexican question* nnd women. -Judge.

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