The Detroit times. [volume], April 16, 1917, NOON, Image 8

About The Detroit times. [volume] (Detroit, Mich.) 1903-1920

Image provided by: Central Michigan University, Clark Historical Library

                
Sped*] Announcement:
We Are Going to War in
Response to Law of Nature!
Just ahead of us. at the side of the
road i* a sifn which reads:
“Stop ! Look! Listen P
The sifa designates a railroad cross
ing
It means that he in the road must
exercise groat caution or he will Ik?
killed.
We are now in a gnat factory.
There are giant machines in operation, j
At numerous points there are signs
which read:
"Safety First!"
These signs are constant reminders
tor the men employed in this factory
that they are engaged in a hazardous
pursuit, and that unless they exerci>c?
the utmost of caution they will be killed.
“Air Hole!"
"Dynamite P
“This Bridge Is Condemned!”
These are warnings that life is im
* periled.
If there is an obstruction in the street,
a red light must be placed there—TO
SAVE LIFE.
If we buy gasoline, we have to carry
It in a can painted red—to prevent fire
and explosion and SAVE LIFE.
If the druggist sells us poison, he has
to attach a label bearing a skull and
eroea bones—to prevent its use by mis
take and to SAVE LIFE.
We have sanitary drinking cups, cup
leas drinking fountains, covers for gar
bage cans, etc., etc., and we swat the fly.
At the intersection of streets and rail
way tracks, there are watchmen, pre
scribed by law. to SAVE LIFE.
The most important post on any rail
(P way system is Ailed by the train dis
patcher, whose duty it is to see that two
trains do not come together on the same
track.
The object of the train dispatcher is
to prevent a WHOLESALE loss of life.
The government exercises the greatest
jaaeantion in the supervision of the sail
km <rf its passenger steamships.
f' mate, engineer, all must first
he competent men.
The boilers must then be inspected,
ire extinguishers must be carried, Are
grill held regularly and a sufficient num
ber of life preserver* kept on the ship
to prevent a WHOLESALE loss of life.
Little red lights flash in our theaters,
here and there.
They bear the word “Exit.”
These numerous exits are provided to
permit an orderly filing out of those in
the theater, to provide against panic and
to prevent a WHOLESALE loss of life.
p.
All buildings, public and otherwise,
where great crowds come together, have
frequent inspection to prevent WHOLE
SALE loss of life.
A number of men were discussing war.
One of the men spoke against it.
“Nothing, absolutely nothing, in my
opinion/' said he. “justifies war.
This man was replied to by a doctor.
“War,** said the doctor, “is absolutely
essential under the laws of nature.
“The history of the world tells us of
the plagues.
“The plagues came to insure the world
against becoming over-peopled.
[„ “Savages waged war to proride against
■— famine and a dearth of food.
m “As the ages rolled on. medical science
began to conquer the plagues. In my
time 1 have helped to carry away the
victims of smallpox by dravloads.
“The world right now is over-poop led.
Our only remedy against it is war.”
Thus spoke the doctor.
Maybe the learned gentleman is right,
but If he IS right, why the “Stop! I»ok!
Listen!** sign at the railroad crossing?
Why the “Safety First!” sign in the
factory?
Why designate air holes?
Why warn against dynamite?
Why not let auto tourists go ahead,
over the condemned bridge?
Why a red light where there is an ex
MONDAY, ADML 16. 1617
cavation in the street?
Why label poison?
Why have they studied out antidotes
for poison.
Why have watchmen at the railway
i eroding* ?
If the idea of war is that the more
| killed the better ofl we will lx*, why do
j they have train dispatchers to prevent
WHOLESALE loss of life?
Why do we waste money on govern
, ment supervision of our passenger
steamers ?
\Y liy have emergency exits in our thea
j ters at all ?
Why go to the trouble and expense of
inspecting buildings in which large
crowds gather?
Why have we pest houses in smallpox
epidemics?
Why do we have campaigns such as
we have just witnessed in Detroit
against scarlet fever?
Why do we call the doctor?
Why do we swat the fly?
Why do we have tag days to prevent
the spread of tuberculosis?
Why not invite the plagues to come
back?
Wouldn’t it be more merciful, if there
is getting to be too many of us, to sneak
up to the old folks in their sleep and ad
minister chloroform?
Maybe the learned doctor is right in
his theory, and maybe it is the case that
war is simply a response to the laws of
nature.
It may be that there is getting to be
too many of us for food and clothing and
shoes to go around.
But if the learned doctor is right,
aren’t we all wrong in the way we have
of selecting those who go to war?
Why, under his theory, should we
send the PICK of our men? .
Why send our youngest, soundest and
BEST manhood?
Why not select those we could best
afford to lose, like our hopelessly insane,
our incurably diseased, our tubercular,
our epileptic and our criminal?
I nder the doctor’s theory, what bless
ings we experience in the form of Ti
tanic disasters, Dayton floods and Iro
quois theater fires.
If the learned doctor is right, then
we have been all wrong.
We should hiss the fireman who comes
out of the burning building with the
child he has rescued, all but dead.
W’e should strew tacks in the path of
the auto ambulance rushing to the hos
pital to save the life of the child.
A Carnegie meda 1 for the fireman
would be a badge of dishonor.
Carnegie medals should be reserved
exclusively, for our murderers.
Our real heroes are watchmen who
sleep at the crossings, train dispatchers
who are drunk at their posts, steamship
inspectors who accept bribes and the
members of the doctor's own profession
who are found guilty of malpractice.
A few days ago in Windsor, Ont., a
mother gave birth to triplets.
Wasn’t that treason?
And doesn’t it make that mother a
traitor to her country?
From Another Point of View
B\t c. t. s
Hogs are now in the neighborhood of
S2O a hundred. We don’t care for them
in that neighborhood either.
• • •
Isn’t a hog at that price just like a
h0 * ? . . .
trough. .... ..
The packers have- both feet in the
• • •
The Ladies’ Aid society of the Meth
odist-Episcopal church, in Kirkland, 111.,
served the following at a church supper:
Chicken pie;
Mashed potatoes
Deviled eggs;
Combination salad:
Rolls;
Butter;
Pickles;
Assorted cake,
Coffee.
All this for 25 cents.
However, it was always our own per
sonal, private opinion that the feeding of
the 6,000 was the original church supper.
9 • •
Ground for a 20-story building is to
be broken in a few days.
9 9 9
If they get to biting we know of some
more ground that will be broken. You
have it light. Phyllis—only one story;
the biggest one got away.
• * •
A Philadelphia preacher says the end
of the world will follow the European
war.
9 9 9
On with the war.
DETROIT TIMES
Telling the Wife About the Annual Stag Show and Smoker.
■ y WEBSTIR
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Ho! mo! Ho! i HfA«i.y Ia Jong- CAu.ee-*n > r oP.
THIS department is maintained tor the purpose of dragging the ad
vertising faker in on “the carpet” and placing hie assertions and
promises under the glass of truth. It welcomes letters relating
eapenencee with advertisers wherein the eagle on the dollar fails to
fly horns “with a dollar's worth of goods * It pays proper recognition to
honest advertisers. It does not spare dishonest advertisers who may be
found In The Times. It will print the lettere which appear most applicable
in preserving the integrity of advertising and protecting the advertising
reader Only signed letters, giving the writer's name and address, will be
considered- The name will be printed or withheld as preferred Address
Ad Mirror, The Times, Detroit, Mich.
DETROIT Mich.
I urn Inclosing s stork apptt<atlon blank of the Per'*' tion lic it *-*
Msnufarturfng company of T>rtroit. and T would like your opinion ©n
this «*ni*rpris** before intestine
i Kindly do not publish my name i C. H O.
Thfc Perfection Devices company la bring promoted m Detroit‘by th*
Mei.-,**«heiHier-Du/and corporation, fiscal agent*.
The I wires company la already a going concern, being engaged in the
manufacture of patented filing and magazine display cabinet*, no designed
a* to save ?i0 per rent of the • pace required by many other cabinets, in
Fort Wayne, lnd.
The inventor is F. X Krabach of Fort Wayne.
The perfection I»e>lces Manufacturing company has been Incorporated
under the laws of Michigan with Mr. Krabach as president, and expect* to
open a plant in Detroit and dispense with the Fort Wayne shop
The company is capitallied a* ISO.OOO Part of this stock is already paid
in. and only a limited amount is to be offered to the public
The company has been granted a permit to sell stock In Michigan by
the Michigan securities commission.
Messrs. Meisenheimer and Durand are men of responsibility and in
tegrlty, and are well known in Detroit
The enterprise appears to have a promising future.
The Keep Well
Column
TEETH!
(rood teeth are put above other
physical qualification* in accepting
men for the I'n.t
®h*v* corns and
[ callouses on his
unuer certain cir
cumstances be ;.e
i • pted, but if he has bad leeth it
tueana rejection
Uncle Sam figures a man with
jrtior teeih cannot chew his food
properly , this means his digesMon
will be Impaired and is an abso
'nie disqualifies’,tpn for enduring the
hardship* of life in the trenches.
The care of the teeth must begin
!r childhood Upon the proper care
of the teeth depends in large pan
the nutrition of th > growing child,
his susceptibility to disease and h's
general health thru Ufc.
Neglect of the first teeth leads
to early decay and loss of teeth,
with a shrinkage and abnormal
-*owth of the Jaws which force the
.rooming teeth out of their natural
position.
Stomach disorders of childhood
are often caused by bad teeth Th*
mouth Is one of the important nr
gsns of dle'stlon Proper chewing
of fi»od is necessary for good dlres
tion A child with decayed, pain
ful teeth will bolt hi* food, and a ill
be stunted In hie growth
Dv-cuyed tee»h also give off pol
son*, which are *rken Into the
bodv. Almost always associated
with had mouth condition* in fhii
dr* n arc di*»a*e* of the tonsils end
eye and * ir inflammation
Henri disease and Joint inflant
no*turn are often traced to decayed
te* i h A child * general health may
V *n disturbed by decayed »eeth
that it soon barom* s a flf subject
for tuberculosis.
From the time of the appearance
Md-Mirror
And Advice to Investors
ff Ths Times Prints It, The Times Believes 1t
f the first tooth there should be »
lally brushing of teeth and gum
’nd thoro rinalng of the raou»h
Parents should realise the great im
portance «f conserving a child':
flr-t tee*h and of correcting anv
nr.*>uth defects. A careful dentist
hould look over t child’s
trice a year If decay is present
fl'hng should be mad*- and oth'-r
d*fe t* correcte«i.
Health Questions AnswsreA
V I’ |„: —“My feet sweat egeen
sivejy Suggest s remedy •
Pm one teaspoonful of form-I
and« iiyde. diluted to half strength In
ester m each shoe for several day.
in succession until the feet arc no
lenger r*er*plring to a troublesome
d* gr< e Repent occasionally as re
quired.
Pointed Paragraphs
Many men are but atuffed suit
of clothes.
With so many courts In sess'm
tkese are Indeed trying time*
Jealousy Is the trading stamp
given with each case of trie lov»>
Mstry a man * hard luck t* due ro
his effort* to avoid hard work
If a man doesn’t care to he his
uwn boss he might :u- well marry
8f m**how a compliment Is plea*
'nr to a woman even when she
knows It isn’t sincere.
!» la surprising how brave th
■ncrape man la when there isn’t tn>
real danger In sight
learning from the mistake* of
other* Is the only comfortable aay
<»r icquirin* a practical education
When a man ha* a kind word fo*
everybody general curiosity |«
aroused until It la discovered what
off)* e he i* running for
Doing Into debt for thing- you
don't need Just be* ause your neigh t
bor has them Is foolish enough t.» I
prove that you are merely human. !
Any man who looking f*'* f
ftowble ran usually find h\ i h
hing the wrong wav the first ni**’i
he meet*
All people are 6n*e* when ‘hry
are o«it of thefr place or out of rh-»i 1
Hma.
Ivet the People
Rule —and Write
A Chance for the Negro.
To thr Editor of The Timet:
We all know without a doubt that
our country m**d many farmers at
this present time
I'on't you think that it would he
a rood Idea to take *.ool' of
colored people that hare come up
here from the south of late and
place them on farm- to raise crop-.?
I believe they would he glad to
farm up here In Michigan
Why I talk thin way in. I am col
ored myself, and I work »nd talk
with a great many every day and it
seem- as iho nine out of every 10
would like to farm. They ha>e been
I farming in the south.
I I understand farming myself and
I ! am a reader of The [fctroit Time*
i\\ hy not you i*eop?e * open up a
sway that w e colored people can
, help raise The cro;»« in Mtohigen
! 'Ol the I‘nited St:i*e* during this
j v ar. NORMAN BLISS.
No. 129 Napoleon st.
April 14. 1917.
Left Find the Way.
j To the Editor of Thr Timet:
I w i»h to express appreciation of
j »he vital puggeatloo made by yon
’ ’hat "a congress of the press of the
world he held soon" founded on »he
' t**ue tdenis expressed in >our excel
'enr article in Monday’s Times.
The go»*l Is the great reality.
* We ne*d *o fare th tt w.iy The laws
inf the universe have not changed
within the past three years. All
»h« good thnt has come to Puro|»e
ha*- come because of appeals to
i ideals and in spde of the nn.tdej
I believe that the mission >f
■ Anierica Is to holp And anew w* iy
to settle the disagreements of na*
1 ti' ns
How do we know but that the
! ; i opl* in Germany would right now
' stand against their government if
f*.cy could he really sine of a true
friendship from Americans
I feel »hat we should do every
thing possible to !iHp give them
true, complete translations of the
addresses given hy President Wil
son Jan 22 and April 2.
r HORTON
( rvtrolt. April 11. 191".
Misinterpreted (j
FVtitha *»* admiring her new
summer frock “Isn’t it wonderful.'*
she aatd, "that all this silk comes
from an Insignlfliant worm”’
"F'dltha, I* it necessary to refer
to yo'»r father in that way 7" her
mother inquired reprowchfully.
The Southeastern Master Balters*
srsociatlon begins Its annual pon
'•ntion today at Jacksonville, Fla.,
with members tn attendance from
* Ml sal
Georgia. Florida. Louisiana and the
Carolina*.
The Old Gardener Sayn
Swiss rl.srd is one rs the beat
vegetable* for ‘mail gardens, be
cause one planting will last all
season Only the outride leaves
should he removed, for »hen new
|eavr« will >.e constant Iv devel
oped from the heart of the plant.
The leaves may he cooked like
spinach, or the midribs may be
cut out and erred tn ihe «ame
va; a* asparagus. for which it
an tyrrllrni substitute It Is
wise for the poultry mar to grow
a row of «wi«a chard exclusively
for hi* hen*
Back Yard Gardens
■T H IDDIXUTAX Bltl’t R
Author of "The Riddle of Person
ality." "Psychology and
Parenthood.'' etc.
In both the I'm ted Stales and
Canada a campaign is under way to
induce city dwellers to transform
their back yards and vacant lots
Into vegetable gardens. It Is a cam
paign directly due to the serious
food situation created by war tin e
complication*.
A* such it is sn appeal to the
patriotism of the people .*nd should
meet with a wide re»|M»n#e. Those
who do respond to It will have th«
satisfaction of knowing that they
are acting patriotically and are
really dotng something of economic
value to the nation.
At the name time they will lx*
gaining important benefits for them
selves. They will lower the cost of
their food supply. They will in
sure themselves a food supply that
Is both fresh and nutritious.
Moat Important of all. they will
Improve in health thru the ever
else they have to txke in the open
air when cultivating their gardens
Many city dwellets—l am tempt
*ul to say most city dwellers do
not get enough outdoor exercise
Th*>lr working hours are spent in
doors in office, store, or factory
Likewise their leisure hours are
•argely spent indoors. hAiiislii.
themselves in the theater, "movie**
ball, dance hail, or other entertain
ment resort.
They do not Aven get outdoor ex
ercise when passing back and foith
h< tween their homes and Lhtli
places of employment. Instead they
ride In crowded cars Or. if they
een. they ride In private automo
h'les and public taxicabs
People like these will profit 1m
mensely from gardening in their
yards or In vacant lota. They may
And It hard work at first. Rut.
sticking at It. they will gain it end
II) In health and strength
Another class of people, and t
1 numerous class. will And back yard
gardening of special health gaining
si* nlAcance to them.
These are the people who. tho
they may already spend much time
outdoors, are for one reason or an
othar nervoualy unstrung In many
ra>e* their nervousness may be di
rectly traced to ldl*ne*«, in manv
others to lack of r*allv pleasurable
| occupation for their minds ll** m?
j Wills else to think about they think
overmuch about themselves
Let such people make a hobby of
hardening and they «<>on will Ard
J tlietr nervous systems better h #l
anced This statement Is borne out
by the experiences of directors of
sanatorium* for the nervously and
j mentally disturbed
1 They have discovered that gar
I dentng Is one Os the best of Cures
for tired nerves and dlatreese,,
I mtnd« therefore ?hf\ set *h» ir
l-*«tenr* gardening. w!& results of
healing that aometimea are almo i
i Pbelievable
Tasea of severe mental depee.
rlon have been helped bark to nor
mality Neurasthenic patients h v
lost their achea and pains Psychn*
thrnlc sufferers hare gained nev
strength and courage for the
struggles of life
If. then, you who read these lines
it* * victim of "nerves, "* or a per
son who does not get enough out
door exercise I urge you In os; <
rial to join the army of those win
win he working In back yard md
vacant-lot gardens this summer
By doing so you will be helper
your country to solve a grave proh
lem of wartime stress, and you w!'l
I helping yourself to gain better
health.
i""*' ~ ~ ■■ ■
Anniversaries
Ton avs nvivt:n«uiu s.
17*1 —Birth of M*r.y Iter ke* elder
danirhier of • Moravian tni**ir>nar>
flrst white child krt. wn t „ b#.» he. n
horn In Ohio.
I *4* British for . under General
Pollock relieved
I*4l —-North Carolina troops sc t#-ij
fort* Cmw«|| an<t lobaston
Fran-e de/ lar-.i ~
Mexico.
Krdf't' ft, .t of auntesif* ar, i
three transport* tan the • onfed*rat*
hatterlr« at Vu V.t.urg
I**7—tVlltoir Wright rne ~f th
inventors of tli, aefoplan.. U.rtt at
Millville Fnd Pled at Havton O
Mav to. ;#i;
. i*»p Pnn - George ~f VV«|„„ snow
j King Georg* V app mte I .
in command <*f tn. British gunboat
1 J Thrn*h.
W Baron Lu following the
| Settlement of fbr New <. t |e*n« lyn- h.
ings aftalrs. «s* « rdered t.v the It* -
i*r g.-vernment to resum# hie po.t „t
W a thing An
Treaty of p. a- e .
China and Japan signed at t, p, ,no
| sekl.
OXF. VFXH XI.G T«»l» X X |V THU
tttK.
British airmen d r< f,ped t mr re
brtmhe on Constantinople
Both Krenr h and G»rrn*n* rls inetj
advantag* In severe fighting at V -r
--dnn
Turkey admitted one of |er ill
marines sank the Russian h xplfal
• hip Portugal
TOO XV# niRTHIMr*.
Angtole I'ranre. ralehraleU h>en h
author and member of i»•« |>> nt h
Academy, horn In Paris, 71 years ago
today.
William Fv Wheelwright, fit# Ore
gon capitalist mr 11 net) for the post
of t'nlted States ambassador •» Japan
b<>rn at Valparaiso. Chile. 41 years
ago toda>
Hsnvuel f> Feikcr, former governor
of New Hampshire horn us lt « hester.
N 11.. J>A ytara ago today
clarence C. Clark. late f'r* l l«-«l
States senator from Wxtiming, horn
In Oswego count >, N. V . 44 v»ars
ago today.
Charll# Chaplin, probably rhe most
widely knnsn nlaver »n n.otton tuc
ture#. horn In Pran<e. «»f Koy-i.si, par
entafe. :x years ago tml*'
.fames J Guilfov and James ,1.
Sullivan, stock brokera* of M*n
Chester. N II are to be placed «rn
trial today on charges of misappro
priating ItflOfXln belonging to thor
client*.
BY earlier la Detroit, « oenta a week; *tae>
where, 10 cents a week By mall. II a
year. Call Main 4620 Entered at tke Poet
affloe la Detroit an aecund-claaa mall matter.
General Information Teat
•V 08. FRANK CRANfc
(Copyright, 1016, by Fraak Crwae)
Now, children, fuud the school mao ter,
1 am going to test your general informa
tion. 1 will give you a list of names. I
want to see if you can tell me some
thing about each one. Identify the
name in some way. Some of them are
modem, some of them are ancient, some
of them are of real people, and some are
of characters in fiction. Are you ready?
(iompers, Lansing. Shaw, Ribot, Thaw,
Scrooge, Masefield, Haig. Hughes. Edi
»on. Cassandra. Eve, Fauntleroy, Ramo
, na, Ramola, Ford, Carranza, Fendennis.
Heep, Goethals, John Ridd, Menocal,
Chesterton, John Gilpin, Jeanette Ran-
kin. Joan of Ah:, Galsworthy, Dr. Jekyll,
Hindi’nburg, Carrie Nation, Howells,
Briand, V'illa, Lafayette. Isben, Dick
Deudeye, Jack London, Benedict Arnold,
Poincare. Ulysses, Zeppelin, Robespierre,
Cleopatra, Judas. Omar, Captain Cook.
Captain John Smith. Captain Kidd,
Sindhad, Brummell, Bolivar, Bagdad,
Kapnume. River of Doubt. Lewis and
Clark, Milukoff. Taft, Galahad, Friday,
Gargantua, Hester Prynne, Cassius,
j Dido, Frietchie, Ophelia, Gerard, Twain,
Sunday, Tagore, Panza Mazcppa, Val
jean, Pick ford. Casement, Rhodes, Buf
falo Bill, Romulus, Robin Hood, Hypatia,
Boone. Tamerlane, Raleigh, BorgiA,
Bacon, Beecher. Savonarola, John
Horace, Mann. Pasteur. Frank
lin, Magdalene. Pericle*, Confucius.
Gettysburg, Tom Sawyer, Romain
Holland, Horace, Pilate, Shack let on,
Bslboa, Deronda. Sherlock Holmes,
Whittier, Josephine, Patrick Henry,
Garibaldi, Bunker Hill, Portia, Verdun,
Micawber. Nero, Lot, Whittington, Holl
; weg, Dewey, Faust. Port Arthur, King
Arthur, Drake. Alamo, Falataff, Parsi
fal, Cornwallis, 1 arragut, Mrs. Eddy,
Mozart. de Lion, Asquith, Bern
hardt, Praxiteles, Zuloaga, Nightingale,
Samuel Johnson. Hiram Johnson, Ben
Jonson, Sheridan (P. H.), Sheridan (R.
; b.), Mount Vernon.
Now tell me who said: "Let us have
peace;” With charity to all and malice
toward none.” "Innocuous desuetude;**
“Millions for defense, but not one cant
for tribute;” "Watchful waiting;” "It is
a condition that confronts us and not a
theory.” "A rose by any other name
would smell ss sweet;'* "Myself am
i hell;” "The of summer;** "Alas
! for the rarity of Christian charity;**
"All mankind loves a lover,” "The world
is my parish ;** "Sail on, 0 ship of state ;**
"Uuoth the raven. Nevermore;** "I have
this principle Natural Selection,■**
“The parliament of man, the federation
of the world;'* "W’hen found, make a
note of" God’s In His heaven, all’s
right with the world;” "I loaf, and in
vite my soul;” "Don’t you remember
sweet Alice, Ben Bolt?” ‘The purifica
tion of politics is an iridescent deeam ;**
j “A policeman's lot is not a happy one.**
Laugh With Us
At • retain Mms #v#rr r*ar a clergyman gnaa
in a farm » f#w milrs oat tn hav# a day's shoot
Inf. H# is h wry poor "shot," but a ganarous
lap.ve: facta _ vell known to
jJark, thr attendant. f u 1
I-a t Christmas hr was out I \\ JR
1 ■*' <-onng and a rabbit Jumped !
•wax
»*-n’ both hnrrrl* but
•X, .«I, •■. 1 » th s Wholr I
"I Md I h't him Jark ■*" asked f WW j
jth*- jiarson In an excited whisp
er.
'Well " aid Jsek. thtnifhtfulljr. '1 rooldna aay
'■ rsctlv t .« \ou ‘it 'lm. but I mus' say F nlTVer
‘ a r;*M»lf wuss scared Ye're raa<ly iroprov
: e«l sin' last )e*r. sir "
The derg-.inan xmiled proudly.
"An' If vc keep* on Improvin' and ran#* again
next year, whv" with a shake of hla head
"suuimat'll hapiH-n tn that rabbit”*
A r*rtaln cricket Hub In the north engaged a
n«w groundsman About the same time they
bought a horse “second hand" to pull tha roller
A day or (wo latter the
I groun4lsman approached the
v *» J club secretary, looking anxious
-ty - "I t»ant to know." he aaid.
<j i S ’ "who Will be reeponstble If the
1 « 'oaa happens to meet with a
iB - haccld#•nt , "
(*m *| , "You would certainly be rw
ft sponsible!" »*vd the puxtled
secretary. "The animal ia la
vour charge.’*
"Then I give notice!” said the groundsman
Armly ‘The brute hasn't speed enough to get
>ut o’ the wav of the roller and one day I shall
run ‘lm down and flatten 'lm out! It's too
rWhy !**
One miserably inclement night recently a two
wheeled cart that had been taken over locally
• vsant for army transport got
-•lin k in the mud. and aa It con-
rained e<»uie odds and ends at [fiT"
lOIN * sent rv
•x hf detailed to stand, guard
it ttatll morning
*- it happened, the man ae- P T f'
l*»ctrd for the job was a rtrb
• k broker In civil life, and B
a- he stood there shivering In iaas 1 *
the wet darkness he thought
s-id said many things.
Fr* •-‘•ntly. however, he beard "viaiting rounds"
apt* and a happy thought atrurk him
i he said to the order!) officer, "how
mu* b is this cart and its contents worth*"
"<>h, I don’t know." ws* the careless reply.
About I should think '*
“Good”* cried »he nentry. “I*ll come bock aith
mu and write out a check for a couple of bun
deed Then 111 turn in ! wouldn't catch my
deaih of cold for twice that amount.**