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The Princeton union. (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, February 03, 1921, Image 2

Image and text provided by Minnesota Historical Society; Saint Paul, MN

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83016758/1921-02-03/ed-1/seq-2/

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Fat Tribe to Engage in Conflict With
Trite of LeansScalps Will
Be Flying in the Air.
The tribe of Fats have once more
called out their medicine men, beat the
tomtoms, danced the scalp and war
dances and finally and solemnly decided
to take to the warpath for the sole
and express purpose of wiping the
tribe of Leans clear off the horizonin
a basketball way. The whole fuss
started over a dispute "between Big
Chief George Ross of the fat tribe
and Medicine Man Odegard of the lean
outfit, the bone of contention in the
argument being whether the last bat
tle between these hated rivals was
won by the fats or the leans. Each
representative vociferously claimed
that his side had been victorious and
waxed warm and excited in the argu
ment. The records of this famous bat
tle of the past were lost in the re
moval of the records of the county
from Princeton to Milaca, so it was
finally agreed that the only way to
determine this momentous question
was to fight the battle all over again
with the agreement that if the fats
won the present encounter they had
also won the past one vice versa.
Chief Ross is calling in his subchiefs
and warriors now and laying down
training rules for them so that they
may be in tip-top condition when the
two clans clash. If you happen to
notice a massive shape moving slowly
and majestically down the middle of
the road in the early morning mists
don't think for a minute that one of
Uncle Sam's biggest battleships has
come up the Rum river for^ battle ma
neuvers. No indeed! It is only Joe
Mossman out for his beforc-break
fast hike and sprint so that his wind
may be in excellent shape when he
hurls his ponderous weight into the
ranks of the skinny leans in the com
ing battle.
Chief Ross has taken to wood split
ting to improve his -condition and has
developed a perfect mania for unsplit
wood piles. He has all his own and
the neighbors' finished now, and any
one who desires his wood split can-be
accommodated by dropping a card to
Chief Ross and giving him the location
of the pile. The chief does the work
free of charge and even pays the own
er a bonus if the pile is an especially
hard one with plenty of knots and
crooked pieces.
Mayor Vandevanter is also counted
on as one of the star performers for
the fat tribe and, being originally
from Missouri, he has" broken all
standard rules of training and adopted
a typical "show-me" attitude that
clearly brings out some of the char
acteristics of his early training in the
stato that produced General Pershing,
Champ Clark, Frank and Jesse James
and other prominent and noted men
In American history. His peculiar
hobby consists of getting onto all the
entertainment committees of the vari
ous lodges, clubs and other local or
ganizations that are now flooding the
market with a wave of dances, enter
tainments, games, etc. This gives
Van a chance to do a whole lot of
chasing around, running up stairs
and down, wrestling with other com
mitteemen who happen to oppose his
ideas of how to put that particular en
tertainment across, and performing all
the other various and numerous ac
tivities of a hustling committeeman.
From continuous practice Van has
now got so efficient that he can run
up two flights of stairs without a stop,
balancing a kettle of hot soup on his
cranium without spilling a drop, twirl
ing a fresh baked mince pie on the
forefinger of his right hand and in the
other hand swinging a roast goose as a
bandmaster would swing his baton.
'Suffice to say that when this rugged
specimen of Missourian manhood
starts ont of his famous charges into
the ranks of the leans the human
wreckage left in his wake will look
like the pictures of Napoleon's retreat
from Russia.
F. W. Manke is also slated to play
\aia important part in the contemplat
ed defeat of the leans. The local po
tato king is getting his wind up by
^chasing after the wagons of the far
mers who unload at the warehouse.
When he overtakes them he delivers
to them personally their small pota
toes, refuse and dirt which was shook
out of the sorter, so that somebody
won't make a holler that they didn't
get the regular market price for the
culls, refuse and dirt that Manke
wasn't bidding on when he bought the
load. Fred is training so conscien
tiously that he don't even get time to
attend court when litigation of more
or less, principally less, importance is
pending concerning the company he is
Fritz Kunkel will be the other regu
lar on the fat's quint, and Fritz's local
reputation is so well known for speed
and endurance that nothing particular
need be said about him at this time.
We will tip it off to you on the side,
however, that Fritz has several old
grudges against some of his lank,
lean and hungry-looking opponents
and has sworn a mighty oath of ven
geance that he will even the count
that night.
Coming down to earth for a minnte
we would like to announce that in the
near future there will be a basketball
game between the local leans and fats
for the benefit of the armory. The
full details of this classic will appear
in due season. Watch the score board.
Next week we will tell you about
some of the lean fellers and how Head
Chemoka-Man Odegard is now cooking
up a mess of home-brew medicine,
which, when rubbed into his athletes,
will make them look still skinnier than
they really are. In this way he ex
pects to bewilder the fats by their in
ability to discover just where the leans
are and what they are doing. For
instance, one of his star performers,
Fred Keith, he expects to have in such
fine and thin shape that the fats will
have to look twice to see .him at all,
and then about all they will be able
to detect will be his shadow. In other
words, this mighty battle is going to
be Brawn vs. Brains.
Moving Situation in Hibbing.
The Union recently published the
following editorial, which was ob
tained from a supposedly authentic
Ribbing is movingthat is, all her
buildings are being transported a dis
tance of a mile and a half to another
site so that the Oliver Mining com
pany, which owns the mineral rights
underneath the village, may dig down
into the bowels of the earth and re
move the iron ore. The moving process
will consume a couple of years. It
looks like sacrilege to virtually shove
this beautiful villageof which its in
habitants were so proudaside mere
ly because of the cupidity of man, and
convert its site into a yawning abyss,
but the property owners had no al
ternative. The steel trust is king.
While the new Hibbing will in course
of time doubtless attain a greater
magnitude than the old, many years
will necessarily roll along before it
can even duplicate the streets, boule
vards, sewers, lights, water mains and
other municipal utilities, which it is
estimated will cost $15,000,000.
In regard to this article C. M. At
kinson, editor of the Hibbing Daily
News, writes ys the following letter,
which we take pleasure in publishing!
Hibbing, Jan. 24, 1921.
Dear Mr. Prowse:
You evidently have been misin
formed, probably by the twin city
newspapers, as to the moving situa
tion in Hibbing, and I hope you will
pardop me for trying to enlighten you.
Hibbing is not being moved. The
north forty, being the original town
site, is ell that is being taken away,
and that at the outset contained only
twenty city blocks, not all built up,
while the old town, including the north
forty, contained somewhere in the
neighborhood of seventy-five city
blocks. The pert being removed con
tains but a very few modern business
buildingsmostly the old shacks of
the early days.
The Pillsbury and Southern addi
tions to the original townsite will re
main. There is one business street,
the remainder being dwelling houses.
South of the Southern addition comes
a beautiful park, and then Park addi
tion, as the starting of new Hibbing,
or the village of Alice as it was
known before being incorporated in
the village of Hibbing. South Hib-:
bing has a business section which is
now being built up by and for the
merchants of the part of town being
removed, and it is being built on a
modern scalethe expenditures in
Central addition alone now represent
at least twenty million dollars. The
new power plant, costing a million
and a third, is located in the new town,
also a million-dollar hospital, said to
be the finest in the world. There is
a hotel to cost upwards of a million.
Many of the new store buildings
will be ready for occupancy early in
the spring-, including a new home for
the Daily News. Buildings are being
dragged out of the old town every day
and others too old to move are being
razed. The proposed adoption of a
city chrrter will make Hibbing a city
of between 25,000 and 30,000 popula
tion with an assessed valuation of
$121,000,000 and a yearly income un-
Do you
know why it ioasied
To seal in th
delicious Buriey
tobacco flavor.
JkvJhuA ,*t*m AJu4r
der the law of close to seven million
dollars. The townspeople and the
mining companies have had serious
difficulties in the past, but in this re
moval and upbuilding program we
are all working in perfect harmony,
because it means the building of a
very beautiful city in the midst of
stumps, boulders, open pits and strip
ping dump piles.
C. M. Atkinson.
High School News Budget.
Senior play books are here. Every
body will be busy practicing now.
Watch for the date.
Notice to kindergarten teachers: If
your pupils get noisy and talk too
much we have a remedy which Miss
Allen threatens to use sometimes in
French class. Ask her, she knows how
to keep juniors and seniors from talk
ing too much.
What's the matter with the type
writers? They're all right. But the
ones using them have the trouble, for
they have to have 18 lessons in at the
end of this week before they can have
a mark for this month.
Wherever you go now you will be
sure to see students sitting in the halls
or in different teachers' rooms. Say,
guilty ones, how does it seem to sit in
buch places?
One day last week our teacher, Miss
Daniels, had the misfortune to lose
her voice. But much to the joy of all
stddents, and especially to those who
took her place in the class room, she
has found it and is at her work again.
The junior gh*ls have organized a
basketball team and are playing
against the rest of the senior high.
They were defeated in the first game
but wc are all sure, after they have
more practice, that they will have just
as much of a chance to win as the
sophomores and seniors who are on the
first teum.
Work on the Annual is being pushed
forward rapidly. Jokes and comments
about each pupil are to be put in, al
though we will not know what has
been put in about us until we get our
Annual. Occasionally one can hear a
pupil ask one on the Annual committee
what has been put in about him or her.
The answer is, "Wait until you get
your Annual and you'll seeX
The seniors have finished studying
Hamlet and are now studying one of
Charles Dickens' novels, "Tale of Two
Cities." We have rcr.d seven chapters
of it and it promises to be very inter
After spending about ten minutes
in French class, every pupil of that
class came into the assembly weeping
bitter tears, not because the French
had opposed them but because the
furnace had taken up arms against
them and with its terrible smoke made
them lose their fort.
The English III classes are reading
"Pilgrims Progress" now for book re
port. "No rest for the wicked."
Worse than slaveryTeacher: Who
knows what is worse than slavery?
Sophomore: Going to school, for we
have half a dozen masters instead of
The girls that took sewing the first
semester have started their cooking
class now. Many1
tempting dishes have
been made and several more will be
furnished before' the cooking classes
The seniors are going to pick out
people to take parts in the play this
week. Everybody is wishing for a
part and living in suspense until the
day when the parts will be given out.
Good luck to those wha can take them.
Pupils' Press Committee.
Bus Line Time Car
N Change in FOR
Prices or Design
The following letter from W. A. Ryan, Manager of
Sales, Ford Motor Co., is self-explanatory:
"\/\fE want to state again with greater emphasis that Ford cars
are already being sold at a-figure actually below cost, ard for an
indefinite period another reduction or change in design is entirely
out of the question and not at all contemplated.
"We believe the public will be fair enough to fully appreciate
the frankness of the above when they consider the extent of our re-
cent price cut which was in fact equivalant to several reductions
one, in our desire to contribute toward satisfying their demands
for lower living costs notwithstanding our 'sacrifice in marketing
our cars at a loss until we are able to materially reduce present
costs through lower material pi ices and greater manufacturing
efficiency. While we have of course made some progress in bring-
ing down operating costs, we still have a long way to go before
any thought can be given to further reductions in present car
prices, so we have no hesitancy in making these open statements
to acquaint you with the true situation.
"You can therefore give assurance to prospective purchasers
of Ford cars that now is their real ppo rtunity to buy below cost
and obtain delivery. Every one is familiar with the heavy demand
for Ford cars in the Spring and this year will be no exception, as
in spite of conditions, business is already accumulating,v so that
many who desire Ford cars will be obliged to wait perhaps until
mid-summer for delivery, causing considerable inconvenience and
perhaps financial loss, particularly to commerciul customers."
Princeton, Minn.
Welcome News.
According to the last issue of the
Elk River Star News a new power
wheel has been installed at the hydro
electric plant. The transfer was to
have been completed last Sunday
when the auxiliary plant here could
furnish power for both Elk River and^
Princeton. The News states that the
new turbine is expected to furnish
more power tlr.n the old one and that
the service in the future will be more
satisfactory. We trust the News is
entirely correct in its assumption that
there will be an improvement in the
Man's Nature to Kick.
When congress is not in session
there is always an imperative de
mand that it meet and do something
and when it is in session there is a
loud holler for it to quit talking and
go home.Buffalo Journal.
1 Are you reading your own
Union, or do borrow
Effective November 3,1920
Owing to the rapidly increasing patronage of the Blue and White bus
line, the Jefferson Highway Transportation Co., Inc., has recently in-
stalled more service between Princeton and Minneapolis and between
Princeton and Onamia.
The company wishes to avail itself of this opportunity to thank the
people of Princeton and the country people along the line for their liberal
patronage and solicit their moral support and continued and increased
future patron.-ige.
Special arrangements have been made with the Merchants hotel at
Princeton, where full information regarding the buses may be had and
where you are invited to come and wait for the busses.
Daily Ex. Sunday
Daily Sunday
A.M. P.M.
Lv. Onamia 7:00 1:10
Milaca 8:05 2:20
Princeton 8:45 3:00
Zimmerman 9:15 3:30
Elk River 10:00 4:15
Anoka 10:25 4:40
Osseo 10:40 4:55
Ar. Minneapolis 11:20 5:35
4:30 Lv. Minneapolis 8:00
5:40 Osseo 8:40
6:20 Anoka 8:55
6:50 Elk River 9:20
7:35 Zimmerman 10:00
8:00 Princeton 10:30
8:15 Milaca 11:10
8:55 Ar. Onamia P. M. 12:15
Office and Terminal 29 N. Seventh St. Tel. Geneva 4478 MINNEAPOLIS
Jefferson Highway Transportation Co. Inc.
These Schedules Subject to Change Without Notice.
your neighboryouSubscrib 1
Only Daily
P. M. A. M.
5:00 5:40 5:55
6:20 7:00
7:30 8:10
Our Policy
has always been to keep the assets of our
institution thoroughly liquid. Our mem
bership in the Federal Reserve System
accomplishes this aim to a degree previously
impossible. In the Federal Reserve Bank
we have an ^unfailing reservoir of cash
obtainable in exchange for commercial
paper which we hold.
First National Bank
Princeton, Minn.
Your Personal Property Tax
Your Personal Property Tax is due and payment
should be made before
Give this yotfi* attention
and a penalty attached.
before it is too late
The convenient way to handle this matter is to
call at this bank and arrange to make payment
thruogh us.
5% Interest Paid on Certificates of Deposit
The best w&y to teach
\s to come in
and open a
count for him
Security State Bank

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