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L f . HE HAD NERVE. Tho Traveling Printer and an Iowa Town. I bad beon devil in The Bugler office, in a town in Iowa, about four months, when the editor was one day called away. The man who was acting as compositor, pressman, job printer, col lector, solicitor, and so forth, seized the opportunity to go off on a spree, and I was thus left in sole charge. Just after dinner, as I was washing the roller and cleaning up generally, in walked the first old 4 'printer bum" I had ever seen. The duds on his back weren't worth a silver quarter, his hair was long and unkempt, his face covered with dirt and bristles, and his breath scented the room. He was ragged, dirty, homeless, and penniless, and had been let out of the county jail, eight miles away, that morning. "Howdy, boy," he said as he came in, and without a second glanco at me he took a seat at the desk and attacked the remains of my lunch. When he had eaten the last crumb he picked his teeth with the editorial pen, peeled oil bis old coat, and commanded: 'Boy hunt me up a job stick." I obeyed, and as he took it ho walked over to the rack, slung in two or three lines of display type, and then stepped to the small pica case and sot up the body of a circular reading: He Has Arrived! The World-Renowned Prof. Peters! Ventriloquist! Mesmerist! Phrenologist! Prof. Peters has engaged Snyder's hall for the evening of Sept. 22, 18G8 "to-morrow evening), and will give the citizens of Carmer City an exhibition of his wonderful powers in ventriloquism, mesmerism, and phrenology. Will im itate the notes of all the birds: will speak to you in sixteen languages; will wager $100 to $5 that he can mesmer ize any person in the audience; can read your character by feeling of your head; will forfeit $500 if he fails in a single case. Medals from all the crown ed heads of Europe. Flattering press notices from the leading newspapers of the world. Everybody turn out. Ad mission only 25 cents. Children free. He placed this matter on a galley, pulled a proof and corrected it, and then cut a lot of print paper to the right size and said to me: "Get up the roller and roll for me." I complied, and he worked off two hundred of the circulars. He was not only a good compositor, but he wrestled that old hand-press around like a man who had never done anything else. When we had finished he said: "Take the tin pail and get me a quart of beer. Tell 'em to char so it to the office." I was afraid of the man, and I got the beer and paid for it out of my own money. He drank the whole quart witli only one breath. "Now, Iheu, take these circulars out and distribute 'em," he said as he put away the pail. "Be a good boy and I'll give you two tickets to this great enter tainment." That was enough, 'and in two hours, with the the help of another boy, I had billed the town. When I returned the "bum" had washed up, combed his hair, and had on a new suit of clothes. He had gone to a clothier's and bought them and had them charged to the ollice, claiming that he had been en gaged as foreman. Further than that, he had been and engaged the hall. I had been back only live minutes when the boozy compositor came in. He had scarcely entered the door when the "bum" rose up, waved him back, and tragically exclaimed: "Go hence! This is no place for the depraved! How dare you enter my office in your presont condition?" The "comp. " backed down stairs drunker than ever, and after the strang er had questioned mo as to when the editor would return he went to the ho tel and engaged the best room. I had hoard that somobody held a mortgage on the office, and it struck me that tins must be the man's agent. I was young and green, and had nevor seen a display of tramp printers' gall. Next morning ho took possession of tho office, When the new sobered com positor arrived, the "bum" selected copy for him and bossed him around, and there was no rebellion. He wrote and sot up several editorials himself, made up the outside pages of tho paper in a neat manner, and worked off two jobs for which $3.75 cash was paid in. During the day two subscribers paid in $4.00, and all tho money wont into tho stranger's pocket. The editor was to bo gone two days, and the man took such complete posses sion that ho believed in his right, and did not kick. During tho day he got a hat and a now pair of boots the samo way he got tho clothes, and ho drank three quarts of beer at our expense. Prof. Peters' circulars filled Snyder's hall that evening to overflowing, and it was the old bum who stood at tho door and took tho money. When the last person had passed in, the door-keeper slid into the darkness, and tho people sat there for half an hour before they realized that they had been duped. Then a grand man-hunt was organized, but it was too late. Tho bum had stolen a skiff and dropped down the river, just about $150 ahead of our town. New York Sim. Mr. Vaiulorbilt's Southern Island. The descent of Mr. W. K. Vandcrbilt on our Southern coast may mean the cap ture of our outlying islands by Northern nabobs. Mr. Thomas Carnegie (not Mr. Andrew Carnegie, as is erroneously printed) is already entrenched on the southern end of tho Cumberland, in tho ancient home of the Greenes. He has retouched tho incomparable avenues and rose gardens of Dungeness at a cost of $50,000, and is said to have spent $150,000 in restoring the mansion and grounds. There, amid his orange groves and live oaks, ho has a home worthy of a prince. Both Jay Gould and James Gordon Bennett have cruised along the Georgia coast and looked with longing eyes on the beautiful isles that stand between it and the sea. Jekyll's Island, which Mr. and Mrs. Vandcrbilt rode 2,000 miles to see, is one of the smallest on the coast, meas uring about seven miles in length and averaging: two in width. Its climate is perfect, St. Simon's on the north and Cnmberland on the south sheltering it from boisterous winds. It fronts Bruns wick, and stands high and clear above the sea. The growth is live oak and palmettoe.'i. Oranges thrive on the is land and the grass is luxriant. Jekyll's was the point selected by the slave ship Wanderer for landing its cargo of slaves. I have heard men tell of visiting the is land that year and seeing hundreds of wild Africans ducking and scurrying amid tho long grasses. A force of canoes deported them rapidly from Jekyll's to neighboring islands and mainland, and when the wanderer was captured less than a hundred of the slaves were found there Jekyll now belongs to Mr. John Du Bignon, and is used mainly for grazing purposes. If Mr. Vandcrbilt birys it, a wonderful transformation may be ex pected. He inherited $50,000,000 in one block from his father, and is good for as much more. His wife is the leader of all the Vanderbilts in fashion. It was she who spent $150,000 on a single ball two season's ago. When she joins her husband in making of Jekyll's a winter home, where spring reigns perpetually and a fashionablo train will follow, the inland waters of our coast will sparkle with yachts. Some Good Advice. It is said that the wine-cup has occa sionally circulated among tho legisla tors, and some have even achieved celebrity by this convivial disposition. Of one who has since achieved reputa tion as a lawyer the following story cir culated among his legislative friends. He attended a ball one evening, and in the course of the festivities he became somewhat too joyous. Seeing this, one of his friends approached him and ad vised him to seek his room and bed. The young lawyer said nothing, but with great solomnitv took a dollar bill from his pocket ana thrust it into tho hand of his friend. "But 1 don't want money," said the gentleman, "I merely suggested that you go to bed." "Take it, cake it," was the reply in the blandest of tones, "I've charged $2 for a good deal poorer advice than that!" Boston liccoi'd. Exhaustive. Biggies "I suppose you have read that work by my friend Scribbler on tho 'Transmulation of Mud?' " De Jones "Oh, yes: I road it casual ly." Biggies "Didn't you find it a very exhaustive workP" Do Jones -"I should say so. Went to sleop before I finished the first chap ter." The Iiambler. THE CRANK'S MECCA. Queer and Amusing Epistles "Which Are Daily Sont to Washington. A Washington correspondent of The Louisville Courier-Journal writes: All men in eminent public positions receive more or less attention from inspired ldtter-writers. Speaker Carlislo is no exception to this ride. To-day ho re ceived thro funny letters. Ono was from a Philadelphia man. He demand ed that the speaker should immediately pass a bill abolishing divorce; making tho granting of divorces by judges a capital offense, and abolishing all schools Jn the country excepting those promot ing the Roman Catholic faith. Another was from a gent in Boston, who requested the speaker to sond him Immediately all tho silver in the treas ury and not less than $190,000,000,000 tin gold and paper besides. Ho wrote that he wanted to go west and buy threo or four states, and as he figured it out Hie Would need that amount of monoy. ffhe gentleman threatens to como on to Washington in case the monoy is not Bent soon, and take an appeal to con gress in which case tho speaker would Hind out "what's what" in very short order. An enthusiastic laboring man's friend in Chicago writes Mr. Carlisle 'that he wishes a bill passed forthwith raising the wages of laboring men to $5 a day and miners' wages to $25 a day. The speaker receives many such let ters as these. Frequently letters are ad dressed jointly to the president and the .speaker. There is no conceivable topic that these queer people do not discuss and give their views upon. For some weeks back their main hobby has been ithe finances, and what should be done with tho surplus coin in the treasury. It may be observed, however, that there are a number of gentlemen in promi nent positions, whom it would be im polite to classify as monoy-eranks, who lire also quite solicitous about this coin surplus in the government's strong boxes, and the vigorous expressions growing out of this soiicitudo have doubtless aroused more "enthusiastic" fthinkers in tho same line into their present state of letter-writing activity. Probably no subject was ever agitated Hn congress which has developed more letter-writing lunatics than the money question. Ono man wants to know why nothing is ever said nowadays about the greenbacks when the money question is up. He has been a greenback man all along, he says, but all of a sudden the bottom has dropped out of his politics. He wants to know who has knocked the stuffing out of the greenback issue, and also whether all this silence does not mean a conspiracy to rob the people somehow by the gold-bugs and bond robbers. He winds up by calling for an unlimited issue of greenbacks, and wants the job of distributing or circulat ing them in his section. This man lives in Michigan. A letter, postmarked "Washington," proposes to sell a high ollicial some valuable real estate for $8,000,000 cash. A minute description is given of the property. It contains so many square rods-and feet, there are so many trees on it, specifying varieties, and the build ings are composed of so many million bricks. Other funny details arc also given which are not quite legible or tangible. From the description given, the property must be the government asylum for the insane on the heights opposite Washington The writer says he nseds the money badly, and suggests that if the ollicial should buy the prop erty and afterward become dissatisfied the remedy would be a very simple one. He, the writer, had the power of put ting a "spell" upon things, and he would simply "prime" the property by touching it under the proper conditions, and it would immediately change its form and become an ornament for the shirt-bosom, or a ring more precious than a diamond, and retain the full value of the money paid for the prop erty. It is needless to say that this very plausiblo proposition is'still under consideration; or at all events has not yet been replied to. The office-seeker also has his trouble in tho letter-writing party. Secretary Lamar to-day received a letter from Vir ginia, evidently written by a man of cultivation, who wishes to serve in the capacity of "bouncer" for the depart ment of tho interior. The Virginian wants a humble placo as an assist ant to the appointment clerk. He had read that the secretary's life had beon almost pestered out of him by oflice geekers. Hin plan was for tho secretary to refer these pestoring democrats to tho appointment clerk, and ho, as his able-bodied assistant, would tako them in hand. Ho writes: "I would got rid! of 'em and will guarantee that when I onco handle them, it will bo tho last ap pearance of that ono insido tho depart ment." Tho lottcr was referred to Ap pointment Clerk Hasslor without recommendation. A GEORGIA SCENE. How tho Boys and Girls Used to Anmso Themselves in tho Oldon Time. After tho writer had grown somo oldor and had beon regularly adopted in the family of "wo uns" and ran with tho boys he was allowod all the privil eges of tho young men of tho commu nity and was told to consider himself at home, which ho did with a good will. On a certain occasion it was decided by the young ladies and gentlemen to havo a frolic at J. W.'s, and I was warned to bo on hand with a few pounds of sugar for sweetening and a couple of skeins of silk for fiddle strings. Strings were scarce about here then and they asked you a quarter a piece for them, I was on hand at the time appointed with tho sweetening and the silk and ready to go after my "gal." It was diflbrout then from now. If you carried no partner with you, you had to take tho chances, as every man had tho exclusive right to his own partner. When I got there she was ready, with a new homespun dress which had never been worn. I, of course, praised the check and the stripe, and the fit. It only took six yards of cloth to make a girl a dress in thoso days. But she announced that she was ready to start and out we went. I jumped upon Bark Mill. She lit up behind me and caught a good hold. And that pony might rear, but she was there if I did come oil. Away wo went, and came in sight of J. W.'s about sun down. The crowd was gathering in rapidly, but no fun had commenced. As we rode up some of the girls sung out: "Now we will havo some fun. Hero comes J. and his gal." My partner rolled off like a bag of rolls. I tied my pony to a fresh sap ling and wo went in. The girls all yelled out: "Why, here comes J." like they did not know I was coming, and that I was always on hand at every frolic. "Now we will have a reel," they said. "Did you bring the silk?" "Certainly. Did you ever know me to fail?" The old lady wanted to know where the sweetening was, as she wanted it for the "gals." W. B. spoke up and said by all means givo it to the "gals;" we would get it back in kissing them. We took our partners, away went the fiddle and on went tho dance a long one. We danced for a while and then we would play awhile. 'Old Sister Pheby,' 'Johnny Brown,' It rains and it hails,' 'Tho London bridge is break ing down' and 'The big cat kicked out the little cat's eye' were among the favorite plays. The beauty of it was every play wound up with a rain of kisses. It was a glorious frolic. Tho kissing made all hands feel like they were at home. Tho writer made a small mistake and liked to have caused trouble by merely an oversight. We were playing a play where kissing was mixed up smartly. One young lady was using tobacco and snufl' freely. Her tooth-brush was in her mouth and a lit tle stream of amber ran clown at each corner. I kissed her on the cheek. She stopped the song and yelled out: "J. is not playing fair. He kissed mo on the cheek." I bogged her pardon and meekly ask ed her to hold her face around. Doing so I buzzed her squarely in the mouth. You might have heard tho echo a quarter. But this restored peace and tho frolic went on. W. B. was in his right element. He called all tho sets and arranged all the couples. No frolic could get on without him. Uncle Jack was there, too, and along toward tho morning hours he wanted to dance. We began to sec signs of red-eye. Men began getting noisy, dancing stronger, betting on their manhood, and finally wound up in a little row; but with a few skinned heads and some bruises, about day all made for their partners and carried them homo to think and fix, for another frolic soon. Franklyw (Qa.) News.