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8 "_' ■';*, " ""of" Amount of , I»ued to Usued for. Payable at ***'*&££»' °' AW ° - bonds, each bond. ___ To —*^> id^iEijToe ~ • • g J. g« j Co- J £ g {. }«■ } £ «{; ; ; ; ; ; wjgj SS 28 to 30. inclusive 3 1,000 00 Edward Elhce Redemption of bonds Pfcß^i&NY May 1883 7 per cent 15.000 00 64 to 78, inclusive 15 1,000 8B=SS_:::::".::::::::: Redemption of bonds P. M. Men A Co., «. X. Bay 1, j"w P S S S 79 to 81, inclusive.../... 3 1,000 00 Edward E ice Interest on bond* p MBvSiftN V May 1 ISS3 7 £er cent 870 00 82 1 870 00 Edward Ellioe Interest on bonds P. M. Myers & Co. , «. X May l pc m QQ 147 1 400 00Wm. Speer .... Interest ;n bonds P. M. Myers A Co., «. ». May i, pc 148 to 155, inclusive 8 1.000 OOJOommittee Ways and Means. . . Interest on bonds P. M. Myers & O*. M. *• May i i cent 3 000 00 156 to 158, inclusive 3 1,000 00 Committee Way. and Means. . . Interest on bonds.. P- M. Myers i Co.. «. i. My i ioo*. p 0Q 159 to 163, inclusive 4 600 00 Committee Ways and Mean.. . . Redemption of bonds P. M. Myers Co., N. Y. May 1 lb»4 7%° en , 400 00 163.V;.. ........ ! 400 00 Committee Way. and Means... Bedemption of bond. p m t NY»wl lW 7 per -;; : : :: 1,00000 176........ 1.000 OOS E. Bewail Redemption of bonds £' m* M^™ % Co"' N V Nov 1 1874 7 per cent . .WOO m.:::::::::::::::::::: 1 Sw^^-^^'™n^^-^- :::::::: l ?:5:! S =ja::S:!: »' i:^' {;:S *±°JH : Total amount of outstanding preferred oity bonds $48,710 00 OUTSTASDINa CITY BONDB (BOUNTY. ) No. 283, issued to Committee Ways and Means, for bounty purposes, payable at City Treasury, May 1,1874 (7 per cent).^.. ; ♦__$?_!!_ No. ! N Tf bW Amount of Issued to Issued for. Payable at Maturity. Amount. 1 Bonds. each bond. __ i Joltolos,inclusive. . }$ K^£ » a^^^ SS 5&&&E »i 1.000 00 Committee Ways and Mean.... Fire department lIS!^S®» = '8358 110 to 209 inclusive 100 1,000 00 Mayor Wm. Lee City in debted ness ... — •• — • {• £ * & C o. N.Y.. September 1, 1897 42,000 00 210 to 298 inclusive j M 500 00 Special committee . . • Int. on bonus bonds to m roads r m y September 1, 1897 8,000 00 294 to 301, inclusive 8 1.000 00 Spe jal commit cc if ma house and hospital • P M. Meyers & 00., N. Y. December 1, 1897 7.500 00 302 to 316, inclusive..... 15 500 00 [committee Alms house and hospital P M . Meyer. & Go. N.Y.. June 1, 1893 7,000 00 3 T. :. inclasive ::::: 5 M™K;;};K^ | 50000 Total amount, of outstanding 8 per cent, city bonds if 263.125 CO STATEMENT NO. 75, OFTSTANDINO CITY BONDS. (Issued to the Saint Paul ft Chicago Railroad Company, 6 per cent.) No . N Tf beP Amount of I I»ued to Issued for. Payable at Maturity. I Amount. Bonds. each bond. . — I 1 Farmers' Loan and Trust ltoloo , e 100 I ,OOO U O B ,Pa I A Ohi C , »H.H.00.... -Bonus- C,,., New York lDoce i 5 1 J9OO^ i:^ :11 100^0 STATEMENT NO. 70. - . orrrsTANDiKo cm bosd3. Issued to the Lake Superior & Mississippi Railroad Company, (6 per cent) «__»«*«„—. ~ '. ; N Tf ber Amount of Issued to. Issued for. Payable at. Maturity. Amount, No - bonds, each bond. ■——. T—l Rnnn« ~ Jay Cooke & Co. N . V. . . November 21, ISSS I £37.000 00 Ito 74, inclusive 74 $500 00 Wm. Q. Moorhead Bonus ;". Jay Cooke & Co. N. .November 21, 1888 j 38,000 00 75 to 112, inclusive 38 1,000 00 Wm. G. Moorhead Bonus .... Jay Oooke& Co., N. V. .. November 21. 1888 j 37,00000 113 to 186, inclusive..... 741 500 00 Wm. O. Moorhead •. — Bonus [ ..... Jay Cooke & Co., N. V. .. December 23, 1898 25.000 00 187 to 236, inclusive 50 500 00 Wm. G. Moorhead Bonus .... jay Cooke & Co., N. V... November 21, 1898 38,000 00 SSgaSfc.;::: I l:So?wm:g: M Sa1:::::::.\-:::ioZ::::::::::::::::::: 0 ..H.Y...De«-i«« l i B oB • 25 ' 00000 Total amount of outstanding city bonds iB a nedJtothB_L.ake Superior & Mississippi Railroad Company $200,000 00 STATEMENT NO. 77. outstanding cm bonds. (Local Improvements.) ' I " i " No" Number j Amount of Issued to Issned for. Payable at. Maturity. Amount. No - , ° r , i each bond. bonds. , _.^_ , ____^ .— . , ».— — __———. . itoHXUnelusive i0"0|~~l^r00"^ Committee Ways and Means... B^Jj^^J TepK same by assessment collections P. M. Myers A Co., N. Y. July 1, 1898, 7 per cent $100,000 00 STATEMENT NO. 78. OUTBTAHDINO CITY BONDS. (Como Park.) Number Amount of Issued to Issued for. Payable at. Maturity. Amount. No - bonds. each bond. * ; bonds. itolOO-incluMve^..... 100 $1,000 00 C^^^"aTd"M^n77 Public park (259.05 -100 acres).... P. M. Myers & Co.. N. Y. July 1, 1003, 7 cent SIOO^OOOJO INDEX TO EEPOET. _^ Statement. Assets and liabilities 9R Alms noose and hospital expense fund "° Acker street giaiing assessment 66 Statement. Board of Education lease j?7 Board of Health " 3 Statement. City revenue ("receipts and expenditures) J Oity bonds (Dr. and Or.) « City bonds outstanding (revenue) ' * Oity bonds outstanding (preferred) '" City bonds outstanding (bounty) 'J> City bonds outstanding (8 per cent.) '* Oity bonds outstanding (St. P. & C. R. R.) "*> City bonds outstanding (L. S. & M. R. B.) 76 City bonds outstanding (local improvements) ' ' Oity bonds outstanding (public park, Como) "° Oity bonds outstanding (years maturing) 1 i City orders 7 Oity debt, objeota of 12 City hall and prison 66 Oomo avenue opening statement 66 D Statement. Dakota county road fond 41 Damages general Si Statement. Engineering department 26 Expenses, general 45 Statement. First ward fund 31 Fourth ward fund 34 Fifth ward fund 35 Fire department 51 Fines returned 58 Fort street grading assessment, between Richmond and Oneida streets 67 Gr Statement. General fund 30 Globe Gasoline Light company 47 Grove street sewer assessment 69 I Statement. Interest (genii -annual in New York) 13 Interest (semi-annual in St. Paul) 14 Interest (annual on bonds) 15 Interest fund 29 J Statement. Judgments, costs, etc ; 67 ' Jackson street opening assessment, through Lambert's addition 63 r. Statement. Ledger balances (Dr. and Or.) 1 Liabilities and assets '...'.'.'.'.".".'.".'.'.'. 2 Local improvement fond .......... . . 37 Licenses returned .!!..!!.....................!. 60 Local assessment expenses ...!!.!!.'.!!..'"..'!.'.!..!." 61 M. o >r:vu ; : Statenunt. Murray, Wm. P., city attorney 18 Mississippi Btreet change of grade, compromised damages. 62 Mississippi street grading assessment, between Glencoe and Grove Streets 68 ' P. Statement. Police department 52 ? Printing and stationery .-..." ; 55 Pooodege re^-r.ed :i : . '. ':.' 69 Stattment. ■ Real and personal estate valuation'for year 1878 : 9 Bice, Henry M., county treasurer 16 Benz, F. A., city treasurer. 17 S. Statement. Sewer pipe account 6 Bewail, J. S., engineer of board of public works, (Bice street sewer construction). .... 20 Sews.ll, J. 8., engineer of board of public works, (engineering contingent fund) 21 Street grading contracts 22 Sidewalk contracts • 23 Sewer contracts. , 24 Street force... 25 Second ward fond %i Sixth wart fund * STATEMENT NO. 72. OUTSTANDING CITY BONDS (PBEFEBBKD.) STATEMENT NO. 7:*.. STATEMENT NO. 74. ocTOTANDina crrv bonds. (Issue of 8 per cent.) I Sewerage fund 38 St. Peter and Tenth street sewer fund 39 St. Paul Gas Light company 46 Salaries 54 Saroni, H. 8. gasolino light contract 48 Sidewalk assessment, on T. B. Princes' contract of Nov. 19, 1875 70 T. Statement. Treasury account 4 Tax collections 8 Tax levy for year 1878 . 9 Treasurer's certificates of sale 10 Third ward fund 33 Tenth, Rice and Rondo street sewers fund 40 U. Statement. University avenue opening assessment C 4 W. Statement. Weber Charles, Chief of Police 19 West St. Paul (now Sixth ward), unadjusted debts 42 West St. Paul (now Sixth ward), funded debt interest 43 West St Paul (now Sixth ward), bonded debt account 44 Water Company, Saint Paul 49 JOHN W. ROCHE, City Comptroller. TUB "GLOBE" FOR ISBO. Special Terms Offered— A K»re Opporta- | city to Secure a I-Ive Newspaper. The St. Paul Daily Globk for 1880 will con tinue to be a live and vigorous newspaper. It will contain all of the current news of the world gathered by telegraph, and in local mat ters will continue unsurpassed and will remain as heretofore, a special exponent of St. Paul enterprise and advancement. Tbo year 1880 bids fair to be one of the most exciting since the close of the war. While the Globe will have ita own well known views and will not fail to express them, it will aim to be a fair newspaper and worthy of support inde pendent of political considerations. As an additional inducement for all to subscribe we make the following Special Offer to Those Subscribing Before February Ist, 1880 : By mall, six lssuaa per week, one year for $6.00 " " " six months for.. 3.'i~> Any one sending ten names at one time and fifty dollars will receive therefor ten subscriptions for one year to the Daily Globk. The party sending this money can retkin the excess obtained over fifty dollars far bY» or ten persons can clnb together and by sending their names and mon ey together each one can obtain a daily paper for one year for five dollars. The Sunday edition will be added on either offer above at sixty cents for six months, or one dollar per year. All papers sent postage paid. TO CITY BCBSCBIBXBB. In the city seven papers per week are deliv ered by carrier, the Sunday issue being a donble sheet. Those who will pay a year in advance prior to Feb. Ist, 1680, will raeeire the Globi in the oity for one year for f7. To obtain these special rates the subscription most be made prior to Feb. Ist, 1830. The regular rates of subscription are for seven issues per week (by carrier) $8.40 per year, or for six issues (by mail) $7.30 per year. The St. Paul WEEKLY CLOSE! For 1880 Sent to any address, postage paid, for ONE DOLLAE. Any one sending five names and five dot Jan will receive a copy of the weekly free for one year. Any one sending twenty subscriptions to the weekly and twenty dollars, will receive the Datly Globk for one year free. THE SAINT PAUL DAILY GLOBE, SATURDAY MORNING, JANUARY 17, 1880. Arrival and Departure of Malls from Uie St. Paul Pout Office. Eastern — Arrives daily at 6 15 a m snd H5 pm except Sunday. Closes dally except Sunday at 11 35 a m, and 7 OS p m. Special— Hunting, Red Wing, Lake City, Waba shaw, T/lnona and La Crosse, Win., arrives dally at C IS am, and closes daily at 7 OS p m. Milwaukee dk St. Paul Railroad, {lowa Div.)— Arrives daily except Sunday at 6 30 p m. Closes dally except Sunday at 8 00 a m. St. Paul it St. Louis, Mo., Route— Arrives daily except Monday at 7ISa m. Closes daily except Sat' urday at 730 pm. Specials— Farmington, Northfield and Faribault, closes daily except Sunday at 330p m. Arrives daily except Sunday at 11 16 am. West }\ iscongin Railroad— Arrives daily except Sunday at 145p m. Closes daily except Sunday at 11 35 a m. Specials— Eh-oy and Harvard Route— Black River Falls, Eau Claire, Hudson and Menomlnee, Win,, arrivos daily Monday exoepted at 6 15 a m. Closes daily Saturday exceptod at 7 05 p m. St. Paul & Sioux City Railroad— Arrives daily except Sunday at 11 15 am. Closes daily except Sunday at 3 00 p m. Fort Snelling, Minn.— Arrives daily at 6:25 p m. Closes daily at 7 65 a m. Specials— Shakopee, Jordan, Belle Plaine, Hen derson, Le Sueur, St. Peter, Mankato, Madelia and and St. James, closes dally except Sunday at 6 30 a m. Arrives daily except Sunday at 625p m. Hastings A Dakota Railroad— Arrives daily ex- Sunday at 6 25 p m. Closes dally except Sunday, at 630 am St. Paul <*-. Pacific Railroad (Main Line.)— St. Vincent to St. Paul— Arrives daily except Snnday at 730p m. Closes daily except Sunday at 7 10 am. Specials— Minneapolis closes daily except Sunday at 630am,11 30 am and 550 p m. Arrives daily except Sunday at 9 00 a m, 300pm and 7 30 p m. St. Paul <t Pacific. Railroad (Branch Line)— Arrives daily except Sunday at 7 pm. Closes daily except Sunday at 6 30 a m. Fargo, Dakota and Bismarck — Arrives daily except Monday at 550 p m. Closes daily except Saturday at 8 15 a m. Specials— Anoka, Elk River, Monticello, Alexan dria, Brainerd, Andubon, Detroit, Moorhead and Fargo, Sank Centre, Olyndon and Lake Park, Minn,, arrives daily except Monday, at 815 am. Closes daily except Saturday at S 50 p m. GLOBE OFFICE Blank Book Manufactory. PIEST-CLASS WORK MM — nort MtUm, A.t Reasonable Hates. Estimate* Siren. Correspond ence with County Officials, and Business Men Generally* is Solicit ted, and will Beoeire Prompt At tention. Address, ST. PAUL GLOBE. l «K. v ... „ . ..„-. Comparative Value of Foods. In a helpful lecturo on the chemistry of food, by Prof. Church, some sug gestive points ot dietetics were well brought out. Of all the cereals, says Mr. Church, wheat yields the best bread. This is believed to be due principally to the character of the nitro genous matter of wheat. The main constituent is a fibrine, and it can be readily obtained for examination by making a little flour into a dough with water, and then washing the starch out by means of a stream of water. Ther j is then left a grayish-yellow, though elastic mass, which "if gluten. Speaking of peas, beans, and various kinds of pulse, it was pointed out how much more nearly the different kinds agree in composition than the cereals do. The great drawback to the" use of various lunds of pulse is that ,they are so difficult to digest. They are an excellent theoretical food, according to analysis, but thoy are a severe tax on digestion. Of all the beans none presents a better typical food than the Soy bean. Lentils have been much spoken of lately as a good food, and they undoubtedly approach to a good typical food, but they are bitter, astringent, and not easy of digestion. It has now come to be pretty well re cognized that the food for a man doing hard work should have flesh-formers or heat-givers in proportion of 1 to 4£, and that the food of a child should have 1 to 7. Bread gives 1 to 7*, where the heat-givers are more than even a child wants ; so it is not a good food by itself. Pulse gives — taking an average —1 to 2J, which is far too small. In these calcu lations heat-givers are reckoned as starch. Potatoes give 1 to 16, accord ing to the latest analyses, the old, 1 to 8, being evidently an error. Onion is Ito i, an excellent proportion, though onions are not much in favor as food. In looking at the relative values of flosh-formers and heat-givers in foods, the actual amount of water must not be forgotten. Forests and Climate. In an interesting pamphlet by S. V. Dorrien on "The Protection of For ests," the author points out these bene ficial effects of forests upon climate : First, forests increase the amount of moisture in a region by promoting tho formation of clouds and causing more frequent precipitations, at the same time retarding evaporation. Second, they reduce the extreme heat of sum mer and the extreme cold of winter. Third, they prevent, in steep mountain sites, the fertile soil from sliding down, and protect against avalanches and landslides. Fourth, they are, especially on the coast of the sea or in mountain ous regions, an impassable barrier against drying winds and sand- drifts. Strange as it may seem, adds Mr. lTbr rien, that a protection against drying wind should be needed on the coast, it is, nevertheless, in the main, correct. During the seasons when vegetation is in active progress, and drying winds are apt to do the greatest harm, the sea has generally a lower temperature than the hind; hence the sea breezes are cool in comparison with the atmosphere over the land. The warmer the air grows, the greater will be the capacity o f receiving vapor without being sat urated and followed by the formation of clouds or the precipitation of moist ure. In other words, the relative moisture of tho air decreases as its temperature grows higher. Conse quently, the air carried in by tho sea breezes, becoming warmer by being brought into contact with the land, ab sorbs a portion of its moisture, and thus has a drying effect. Experience shows that this effect extends over many miles from the coast, unless for ests or mountains serve as a cover. Singular Freak of an Engine. An accident occurred on a local rail road that is probably without a parallel in the history of railroading — in Illinois, at least. As a train on tho evening of the day was near Glassford, going at the speed of nearly forty miles an hour, a cow suddenly bounded in front of the engine. There was no warning what ever; the front of the engine passed over the animal, and in doing so was lifted clear of the rails and uncoupled from the tender. Going at such a high rate of speed, it continued some twenty yards on the ground, tearing it up, and even uprooting a stump in its mad ca reer, and, what is very strange, kept on its wheels until it came to a standstill, where it stood clear of the main track. The remainder of the engine and train kept the track, and ran past the engine about a quarter of a mile, when it was brought to a stop with brakes. The jar of the engine was so light that but few passengers were made aware of the ac cident until told. The engineer sat on his seat throughout the affair, a mere opectator of the queer freak of his en gine. No one was hurt, or even scared. —Keokuk (Iowa) Gate City. The Use of Tails. A very important function of the tail of the yak, cat, squirrel, and many other animals, has escaped the notice of many writers. It is that the bushy tails of the animals serve a very important function in preserving their body heat during their nightly and their wintry sleep. In cold weather animals with bushy tails will be found lying curled tip with their tails laid carefully over their feet like a rug, and with their noses buried in the fur of the tail, which is thus used exactly in the same way, and fdr tho same purpose, as we use respirators. I have a Manx tailless cat, who cannot, of course, carry on this function, but he makes a very good sub stitute for it by using the back of one of my other cats. When he cannot be so accommodated, he sleeps with his hands crossed over his face, " ]tist like a Christian," as my cook says.— Nature. Jefferson's Farewell. Jefferson's last hours were enlight ened by the Christian's hope, but there is something pathetic in this blending of a father's affection and a philoso pher's faith. Two days before dying, Thomas Jefferson told his daughter, Mrs. Kandolph, that in a certain drawer in an old pocket-book she would find something intended for her, and after ward, looking there, she found the fol lowing verses written by him : Life's visions are vanished, its dreams are no more. Dear friends of my bosom, why bathed in tears? I bo to my Father, I welcome the shore Which crowns all my hopes, or which buries my cares. Then farewell, my dear, my loved daughter. adieu! The last pang of life is in parting with you ! The seraphs await me long shrouded in death; I will bear them your love on my last parting breath. Clever Recovery. Several years ago two £50 Bank of England notes were taken from the dining-room of a Mr. Terrett, a trades man of Bristol. A servant was charged with stealing them, and the charge was dismissed; bnt, on Mrs. Terrett search ing the ashes of a fire-grate, there were found particles of tinder which, when submitted to a microscope, were ascer tained to contain the number and trace of the water-mark of the notes. The ashes were sent to London, and there subjected to further examination, with the result that the bank refunded the ttwraey. _____________ Tee reading-room of iha British Museum contains three miles of boplr cases eight feet high. The dome whence the electric light irradiates the vast room is, next to that of the Pantheon at Rome, the largest extant. GOSSIP FOB TILE LADIES. Dangerous Frankness. Inconstant. And why not, O fair Helcne ? You have the bluest eyes I've over seen, Blue as tho violets in that season when The nelds and hills are tiDgcd with faintest green; But you have not sweet Marie's tender voico, Or Constanco's smile, In which all hearts rejoico. Inconstant? Why, I love the good iD all, The good in one, and like the roving bee (Ah you ban &;«.-. lair Helene, will you call My " roving beo " a threadbaro simile f) I go from flower to fruit, and I love each, The faint-tinged rose-bud and tho carmine peach. I love you for your eyes, O fair Helene, Your blue, blue eyes, so deep and limpldcloar. In whose bright depths are drowned many men, And for their deaths haveyou notshed a tear; And yot I love dear Rosalind's shy grace, Ami- can I help It?— little Celia's face. I love tho good in all, the good In one. Too frank, am I? Can't help it. His my way ! If you'll be Clytie, I will bo tho sun, And you can follow mo about all day; And yet I'll smilo on all, and that will bo Love universal, not inconstancy. Conceited? How you wrong me, fair Htlenc. I'm not Apollo, and I know that well ; But you're uot Clytie; if you were, whythen I'd foliow you. Good gracious 1 who coul<l Ml The girl would get so mad? A temper, too ! I'll never trust in meekest eyes of blue! —Maurice F. Egan. Yiinkee Cilrls Abroad It is doubtful whether any country in the world produces so many pretty girls as America, and it is certain that some of the prettiest in the world* are Americans. The fact is indisputa ble as the causes of it are obscure. The little New York beauty is irresistible so long as she keeps her mouth shut, and almost irresistible even when she opens it. We know the dignity and bearing of an Austrian lady, and the common place comeliness of a little German parvenu. We have our pet theories, ready cnt out and dry, and can apply them to every case. The lion and the unicorn are fighting for this crown of beauty, and up comes the Yankee belle and knocks them both down. The impartial Parisian (in a suit of dittos), standing with his hands in pockets on the Ehine boat, and not paying the slightest attention to the scenery, but looking at the pretty girls of all the countries in the world, singles out the New York Venus in a moment. He has not a doubt but he is right, and she thinks that he's an excellent judge. And yet everything is against her. She comes to us across the Atlantic with that horrible twang that spoils every thing, and of which she seems utterly unconscious. She perks it up in your face with the most provoking sang froid. Her mother accompanies her, and a hatchet-faced objectionable broth er, who seems to have the grace to know that he is not a gentleman, and is, in consequence, alternately depressed and defiant. A man, however matrimonially inclined, gazing on that alpaca mother, finds serious courtship a difficulty. A little general flirtation is, however, de lightful ; and it is impossible to with stand so much beauty, set off by such a charm of manner. The little American does not object to the flirtation; but she has a frugal mind, and knows the kind of lover who is likely to develop into a husband. Yet, with all her fru gality, she has a mind on pleasure bent; and flirting, which in England is a practice and in France an occupation, is for her a science, which she studies conscientiously, and in which she makes daily progress. She is still young, perhaps not out of her teens ; but she has heard a great deal, seen a great deal, knows a great deal, and cer tainly makes no secret of her expe rience. She is perfectly frank, and her absolute realism protects her from some of the bad effects which flirtation pro duce in England. It is hard to avoid admiring her, and it is impossible to believe that the lady in alpaca is her mother.— Mayfair. The "Pizen-Clean" Woman. Cleanliness is an excellent acquire ment. It is so great an acquirement that one does not wonder that the sent ence "Cleanliness is next to Godliness," was popularly supposed, for an indefi nite period, to bo a quotation from the Bible. Cleanliness is the chief distinc tion between the tramp and many mill ionaires, albeit there have been many millionaires who could not claim even this advantage over the tramp. But the sentence, "Cleanliness is next to God liness," cannot be found in the Bi ble, nevertheless. You cannot have too much Godliness, too much temperance, too much discretion, too much wisdom, but you can have too much neatness. There have been overneat men. We have met one or two in our time. They always get up in the night to eat, and are enemies of sleep as thoy are of dirt. But they are not so numerous nor so pestiferous as the overneat woman. Who has not met the overneat woman ? Wo do not need to describe her. But wo will. Eovenge is sweet. She makes her husband exchange his boots for slippers on the door-step. No matter how low the thermometer or barometer, the poor fellow must doff his boots in the porch. Is he wet? Ho must stay on the stoop till he has done dripping. Consumption ! What is that compared with a soiled carpet? The small boy, what a life he leads with such a mother ! Followed about by a dust-pan and neat woman is always cross) all of child hood's days, he early runs to a club room or a beer- saloon where ho can see a little rubbish and find the luxury of dirt. We once knew a lady of this character who, when lightning provi dentially struck her house and killed a servant, swept up the evidencing dirt the shock had dislodged before the Coroner could be called. These " pizen-clean" women always hate to have company. "Guests are so dirty, you know." The parlor is kept dark and unused from year to year. The carpets would fade and dust would accrue. We once knew a woman who refused to open her parlor for the wed ding of her daughter. " The street is too dusty," she said. She is dust now. They opened the parlor for the funeral, and one almost wonders that she did not turn over in her coffin. The overneat woman cleans house twic6 a year. Twice a year the uncom fortable husband and children are made doubly uncomfortable. The weak ness of the flesh alone deters her from house-cleaning every moon. The over neat woman delights to make people uncomfortable. She is thin, dyspeptic, has nervps, is troubled with dirt on the brain. Dirt on tho brain is very wear ing to the constitution, and the hyper neat woman nearly always dies young. If she did not all her household would. Her husband always has another chance. This is a dispensation of Providence. We write with some feeling on this subject, although, thank God, we have only seen the overneat woman afar of But we have seen the lives of good men embittered, we have seen boys driven to ruin, and girls imbued with such a hatred of cleanliness that they have become very slatterns, by overneat wives and mothers. An, mother, do yon not mind a clut tered floor, a little gravel or sand on the carpet, a finger mark on wall-paper or mirror. The day may come when a little dirt spread by baby feet or laid on by bnay baby fingers would be the gladdest sight in the world, We wandered sadly round the room, No relic could we find ; No toy of hers to sootbe the gloom — She left not one behind. But look ! there is a misty trace, Faint, undefined and broken. Of finger* on the mirror's face— A dear, though simple token. Ah, friends, how clean such dirt is! "Whom eaa w« trust?" :s the black type inquiry of an exchange! It is oi no consequence. "Whom can we in duce to trust ns?" is the soul agonizer, Twain's Best Joke. That quaint and original genius, Sam uel L. Clemens— Mark Twain — told a story at his own expense while break fasting with a journalistic friend in Chicago, which is too good to be lost. There had been some talk at the table about a banquet, which had just come off when Mr. Clemens remarked with a Bmilo and his peculiar drawl : "Speaking of banquets reminds mo of a rather amusing incident that oc curred to me during my stop in smoky, dirty, grand old London. I received an invitation to attend a banquet there, and I went. It was one of those tre mendous dinners where there are from 800 to 900 invited guests. I hadn't been used to that sort of thing, and I didn't feel quite at home. When we took our scats at the table I noticed that at each plate was a little plan of the hall, with the position of each guest numbered so that one could see at a glance where a friend was seated by learning his num ber. Just before wo fell to, some one — the Lord Mayor, or whoever was bossing the occasion— arose and began to read a list of those present — No. 1 , Lord So-and so, No. 2, Duke of Something-or-other, and so on. When this individual read tho name of some prominent political ►character or literary celebrity, it would be greeted with more or less applause. Tho individual who was reading the names did bo in so monotonous a man ner that I became somewhat tired, and began looking about for something to engage my attention. I found the gen tleman next to mo, on the right, a weil informed personage, and I entered into conversation with him. I had never seen him before, but he was a good talker and I enjoyed it. Suddenly, just as he was giviag me his views upon the future religious aspect of Great Britain, our ears were assailed by a deafening storm of applause. Such a clapping of hands I had never heard before. It sent the blood to my head with a rush, and I got terribly excited. I straight ened and commenced clapping my hands with all my might. I moved about excitedly in my chair, and clapped harder and harder. ' Who is it?' I asked the gentleman on my right. ' Whoso name did he read? ' " ' Samuel L. Clemens,' ho answered. "I stopped applauding. I didn't clap any more. It kind of took the life out of me, and I sat there like a mummy and didn't even get up and bow. It was one of the most distress ing fixes I ever got into, and it will be many a day before I forget it." The Antiquity of Forks. Among the valuable finds in the ex ploration of the relics of the ancient lake-dwellers of Switzerland is a pair of forks, apparently invented for table use. They were fashioned from the nietatarsal bone of a stag. This gives a higher antiquity to tablo forks (if they were really intended as such) than has hitherto been suspected. Other bone implements and ornaments are frequently found. Animal remains are also common. Among them are the bones of the dog, tho badger and the common otter. The latter were doubt less met witli in the immediate neigh borhood of the lake, but the presence of the bones of the wild ox and of the bear indicate that the lake-dwellers were bold and skillful hunters, as well as ingenious tool-makers. They were ako keepers of cattle, for the most nu merous animal remains brought to light were those of the common cow and the moor-cow. These exist in every stage of growth, showing that their owners had a taste for both veal and beef, while their fondness for venison is proved by the many bones of the stag and roe dis covered by the explorers. Evidence of a like character shows that they were hunters of the wild boar and eaters of the domesticated pig, aud the existence of the beaver in Switzerland in prehis toric times is attested by tho presence, among other bones, of several which comparative anatomists declare to have belonged to that rodent. One omis sion on the list is striking. No men tion is made of the bones of horses having been found, from which it may bo inferred with tolerable certainty that the horse was either altogether un known to the ancient lake-dwellers, or that they had not succeeded in captur ing and taming him. Millions of Pigeons. The most celebrated pigeon-roost probably in the country is in Scott county, Ind., where, it is said, acres of timber are covered nightly with wild pigeons. For the past seventy-five years this noted locality has been a roosting-place for pigeons, and millions of these birda congregate there nightly during the seasons of their visit 3 to that section of tho couutry. They fly away of mornings to their feeding places in the woods and fields of Indiana and Kentucky, distant from the roost in many instances from 100 to 300 miles, returning again at night, arrivals often continuing up to midnight. The timber on thousands of acres covered by this roost is broken down badly, large limbs being snapped off like reeds by the accumulated weight of tho birds upon them. Throughout tho entire night there is heard the cracking and crushing of limbs, the hum and flurry and drumming of wings, the explosion of firearms and tho confusion and bedlamic thrashing sounds caused by people beating the birds from the trees with long poles. Thousands of pigeons nre killed nightly, but all this slaughter eeems to make no diminution in the vast flocks that congregate at this roost. Two Valuable Inventions. The following new inventions by residents of Nevada, says the Virginia (Xev.) Chronicle, have been caveated at the Washington Patent Office : A Baiujeb's Mu/zler. — This is a very serviceable contrivance, which can be fastened over a barber's month to pre vent his talking while shaving custom ers. It is made of iron, padded inside, and can be fastened securely so as to cover the whole mouth. It is furnished with clamps and screws, which are fixed at the back of the head. Price $2.50. Thoso furnished with a lever attachment, for the purpose of breaking the barber's jaw come at $3. The plates which fit on the cheek are of the best chilled steel. The Bonnet Grapple.— This little machine is destined to be of great ser vice to theater-goers. It is an ordinary grappling-hook with a rope attached. The grapple is thrown over any lady's bonnet which may happen to obstruct the view, and the crowd behind can al ways be depended upon to pull the rope. It sometimes disfigures the lady's face permanently, in which case she never returns to again obstruct the view. Pine Cones for Fire Kindling. Almost the universal article used on the continent for kindling fires are dry pine cones. A couple of these is usually enough to start a fire of dry wood, and several of them contain enough resinous material to start a coal fire without other kindling. They are readily ignited with a match, and are free from dust and insects. In Paris and other large cities on the continent, scarcely any other than pine cones are used for kindling purposes in the ho tels, and it is a wonder to us that they have not been introduced for the same purpose here. We believe a large and profitable business might be made from gathering the rones in pine-growing regions and Belling them in our cities. —Scientific American. PITH AND FUIRT. The latest thing in boote—Stook ings. At a spelling match one man spelled "pasnip, and got beet. A post in the ground becomes decade wood at the end of ten years. The barber's razor took hold of his beard with a vengeance, when he looked up and said, apologetically : "My dear sir, I came in to get shaved— not to get a tooth pulled!" A little girl, on being told some thing which much amused her, ex claimed, emphatically : "I shall remem ber that the whole of my life, and when I forget it I will write it down." The donkey is a prftty bird. bo gentle and so wise; It has a uiky little tail With which to frisk the flies. L'pon its head two ears it bears, So silky, long and soft, iliat, when its tail can't reach the flies, Tho ears can whisk thtm off. "Can you cure my ejes?" said a man to Dr. Brown. "Yes," said the doctor, "if you will follow my prescription." "Oh, certainly, doctor," said the patient ; "I will do anything to have my eyeH cured. What is your remedy, doctor?" "You must steal a horse," said the doc tor, very soberly. "Steal a horse, doc tor !" said the patient, in amazement. "Fow will that cure my eye 3?" "You ■will be sent to State prison for five years, where you could not get whisky ; and, during your incarceration, your eyes would get well," said the doctor. The patient looked somewhat incredu lous, but he did not adopt the doctor's remedy. " You play poker, of course," said one gentleman to another, who was shuttling a pack of cards in such a scientific man ner as to betray an intimate acquaint ance with the articles. " No, I never do," was the response. "Indeed," ex claimed the questioner, " I thought ev erybody in Eureka played poker." " I am the solitary exception." "And how is that?" " Well, you see, I got into a big game; had an ace full and lost $300; then I held four queens and got beat out of SGOO more. I then said to myself, ' Old boy, this ain't your game ; there's no money in it ; you'd better stick to solitaire ; it ain't so exciting, but it's safer;' and so I've stuck." "Old Si" and the Drummers. Old Si brought up the church notices and thereupon remarked : "Ise gwine tor meetin' ter-morrer, sho ! I don't know what time er 'skur shun trane's gwino ter Cop offen de track an' switch me onter de down grade, an' I don't want ter go dnr, ef hit's jess ter miss de kumpeny ob some f okes dat'll be dar!" "Anybody specially, now?" "Hit's mos'ly dese hyar kermushul trabellers — dese drummahs -dat Ise boun' ter shake somewhar' twixt heah an' kingdum come, sartin !" "They are very clever people, aren't they?" "Well, I ain't 'quainted wid dem all, but, ef dem dat I does kno' am fair samples, jess 'skuse me fum de ballunce. Wy, dey's de wust men on de rode book agints bein' barr'd offen de track !' "Why do you think so?" "'Ease Ise had 'sperienco wid dem Dey comes round dar ter de hotel, takes up mo' room dan er dead-head edutur in er sleepin' kyar, cusses de porters wid dere moufs an' han's, hez two trunks erpiece that weighs like dey wuz nailed ter de flo an' clinched in de room down stairs, an' den dey makes lub to ebeiy woman in de house funi do chamber mades in de garret ter de gubnor's maiden aunt dat bangs de pianncr in de front parlor." " They are pretty fast boys, I should judge." "Wy, yer jest ortar porter in erhouso er while whar dey comes ! Dey 'pears ter be hired fer dere moufs, an' two ob 'em kin talk er hotel full er people, in Fair-week timc3, into gallopin' kon sumption! Dey interferes wid do ad vertizin' bizness ob de newspapers, an' ter heah one ob dem talk yer'd tink ho wuz do whole 'Soshiated Press, an' had do monoperly ob de news ob de day ! But leo larnt wisdum, an', when 1 sees er drummah commin' offen de trano, I goes lame right den an' dar !" " Stil l they do a great deal of good in commerce." " Jess so ! But den I don't like ter see dese hyar wholesale peddlers run ning ober do country in dis style. I'd rudder see Sherman's army comin' agin dan ter see er convention ob drummahs in dis town. Dey ar' moughty aan gcrua ter de good licker an' de fresh eggs in town, fer dey's pow'rful fond ob loaf! An' I say agin I don't want ter go down yander in de 'furnal regions, 'kase, ef I has ter go, I don't want ter bo pester'd all de time by dese drum mahs tryin' ter sell me pam-lcaf faii3 an' linen dusters !" Ked Hair Defeudrd. An admirer of red hair, who has it himself, glorifies that style thus: "Throughout creation nature appears to delight in red. It predominates in the pleasure of the imagination, for whatever is beautiful, agreeable or sub lime partakes of red. Tho rainbow, tho rose, and the charming lip and cheek of beauty's self, the sun, the source of heat and light, all are red; as is also tho fire, the mighty autocrat of the uni verse. The most brilliant flowers, tho most delicious fruits, the orange the apple and the peach are red. Through tho animal kingdon»red predominates, as in tho king of beasts, tho lion. But go further; Adam, the first of mankind, was red. The greatest of Grecians, Jupiter, Apollo and Vulcan, were crim son. Samson, whoso strength was gigantic, derived his power from his red hair, and tho destiny of the empire of Athens depended on the red hair of Nisus. Queen Elizabeth had red hair ; so had Spenser and Shakspeare. Mil ton is another instance of the proof of my proposition. Also Defoo, tho au thor of that world-renowned story, " Robinson Crusoe." Lafayette had red hair ; Bonaparte's hair was of this color. Artemus Ward had red hair ; so have red Indians, or clao why so named ? " etc. Die English and American Languages. English and American travelers visit ing the respective countries will profit by etudyiug the following catalogue of the different British and American meanings, attached to certain words : RnalUh. American. Jug " Pitcher. Boots -Gal «■». Slioes Slippers. Supper ..; Tea. Public hoase '. Saloon. Tram '• Streetcar. Imp :....Dug(jy. Knocked up Tired out. I think I guess. Treacle Molasses. Maize Corn. Corn Wheat. Coals Coal. Greengrocer Vegetable stand. Haberjasber Notion store. Dorks Wharves. Prints Calico. Muslin , Lawn. Our lodgings Our ro jms. .Station ' Depot. Carriage (railway) , Care. An outing An excursion. History Not nis Forte. Senator Sharon once dined with a literary club in New York. At the table he quoted from history, and a little man at his right joined issue on the ques tion. Sharon waxed a trifle warm, and insinuated that his opponent might be a clever sort of a man, but history was not his forte. After dinner, Sharon re marked to a friend, "Who is that little cuss there who disputed my dates?' "Bancroft, the historian."