Daily globe. [volume], July 10, 1883, Page 3, Image 4

About Daily globe. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1878-1884

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EVENINGS AT HOME.
Solomon tells us that there is time for
all things ; a time to weep, and a time
to laugh, to play and to dance. Surely,
the tin?e to laugh, to play and to dance
comes most appropriately in the long
pleasant evening hours, when
The cares that infest the day
Fold up their tents like the Arabs
And silently steal away.
It is well for the women of the house
hold to remember that the pleasant
evenings at home are strong antidotes
to the practice of looking for enjoyment
abroad, and seeking for pleasure in by
and forbidden places ; for relaxation and
recreation will be indulged in somehow
by most men, and happy are they who
find in the home circle the diversion
they need. A lively game, an interest
ing book read aloud, or, in musical
families, a new song to be practiced,
will furnish pastime that will make an
evening pass pleasantly.
A little forethought during the day,
a little pulling of wires that need not
appear, will make the whole thing easy,
and different ways and means may be
provided for making the evening hours
pass pleasantly, and a time to be looked
forward to with pleasant anticipations.
We visited once in a large family
where it was the duty of each sister, in
turn, to provide the evening's occupa
tion, and there was a pleasant rivalry
between them as to whose evening
should be the most enjoyable. The
brothers entered fully into the spirit of
the simple home entertainments, and
were as loth to be obliged to spend an
evening away from home as their sisters
and parents were to have them absent.
Every one spoke of this family as an un
commonly united one, for each and
every member showed such a strong at
tachment for the home to which each
one contributed so much pleasure.
POLAR EXPLORATIONS.
For many years explorers Lave made
attempts to penetrate to the far North,
seeking the open Polar sea, which was
believed to exist, and endeavoring to
penetrate to the North pole. In 1850
au Arctic expedition was fitted out by
Henry Grinneli, of New York, with
Lieut. E. J. DeHaven as commander
and Dr. Elisha Kent Kane as naturalist
and surgeon. This is classed as the fh-st
United States expedition of search ; it
returned in 1851 without finding trace of
Franklin. Dr. Kane in 1853 sailed
from Boston in the Advance, with a
company of seventeen men, among
whom was Dr. Hayes; they encoun
tered many dangers, and returned to •
Boston, where they arrived Oct. 11, 1855.
On May 29, 1860, the first expedition o
Charles Francis Hall sailed from New
London, Ct,, to search for Franklin,
and returned without finding any trace
of that navigator, after an absence Of
two years. Dr. Hayes sailed from Bos
ton, July 9, 1860, in the schooner Unit
ed States, of 133 tons, with fourteen per
sons in the party, not including him
self ; he reached land in latitude 81 deg.
37 miii. Hail started from New Lon
don, Ct., on his second trip, July 30,
1864, and returned in I860 ; and again
he fitted out an expedition by a C< >n
gressional appropriation, and went
north to find the open Polar sea, but he
died m Greenland, Nov. 8, 1871 ; his
vessel was the Polaris, which sailed from
New York June 2fl, 1871. On July 8.
1879, the steamer Jeannetle was fitted
out at San Francisco by James Gordon
Bennett, for an Arctic trip through
Behring's straits, tke crew numbering
thirty- two men. On June 19, 1878,
Lieut. Fred Scwhatka, with a party
of five, left New York in search of the
remains of the Franklin party, which
were found, and the party returned after
an absence of over two years. A prop
osition has been made by a prominent
and aventurous English naval officer to
go north as far as possible by vessel and
sledges, and take balloons and with them
seek the North pole.
GETTING USED TO IT BY DEGREES.
Somewhere about here, writes a South
ern correspondent, lives a small farmer
of such social habits that his coming
home intoxicated was once no unusual
thing. HLs wife urged him in vain to
sign the pledge
" Why, you see," he would say, " I'll
sign it after a while, but I don't like to
1 ireak right off all at onee — it ain't whole
some. The best way is to get used to a
thing by degrees, you know."
" Very well, old man," his helpmate
W( uld rejoin ; " see now if you don't fall
into a hole one of these days, where you
cau't take care of yourself, and nobody
near to help you out."
Sure enough, as if to verify the proph
ecy, as he returned home drunk one day,
he fell into a shallow well, and, after a
deal of useless scrambling, he shouted
for the "light of his eyes " to come and
help him out.
'•Didn't I tell you so ?" said she, good
soul, showing her cap frill over the edge
of the parapet; " you've got into a hole
at last, and it's only lucky I'm in hear
ing, or you might have drowned. Well,''
she continued, after a pause, letting
down the bucket, "take hold."
And he came up, higher at each turn
of the windlass, until the old lady's grasp
slipped from the handle, down he went
to the bd in. This, occurring
more than once, made the temporary
occupant oi the v. _L suspicious.
"Look here," he screamed, in a fury,
at the last splash, "you're doing that on
purpose — I know you are !"
" Well, now, I am," responded his old
woman, tranquilly, while winding hiui
up once more. "Do you not remember
telling me that it's best to get used to &
thing by degrees ? I'm afraid if I bring
you right up of a sudden, you wouldn't
find it wholesome."
The old fellow could not help chuck
ling at tiie application of his own prioci.
pie, and protested that he would Bign
the pledge on the instant, if she would
lift him fairly out. This she did, and"
packed him off to sign the pledge, wet
as he was.
A THRILLING INCIDENT RECALLED.
Mrs. J. M. McTeer, who died at her
home in Wytheville, Va. , not long ago,
was the relict of CoL Piper, who gained
a national fame through his perilous feat
of climbing the Natural bridge in Rock
bridge county, while a student at Wash
ington College (now Washington and
Lee University). During the summer
of 1818 he and three other students ob
tained permission of the President to
spend a day from the college, and they
went (about twelve miles) to the bridge.
As soon as they arrived, in youthful glee
they commenced the ascent of the pre
cipitous side of the bridge, and cut
figures and names upon the stone.
Young Piper espied the name of Wash
ington standing above the thousands of
others, and started upward to write his
name above that of the first President.
He made a laborious ascent, and in
scribed his name fifty feet above that of
Washington, and continued upward,
cutting his footholds with his knife, un
til he stood 170 feet above his horrified
companions, whose entreaties for his
return had become more and more
difficult for him to hear. From this
point he turned for the first time and
looked downward, to see that return was
0 >le, and the advance was almost
impossible, since the knife that had
carried him so far was worn nearly to
the handle. Each moment was one of
intense suspense to his companions, who
from below watched for, and ex]
liis destruction at any time. Painfully
he worked up a few feet higher, until
the knife was useless, and he hung
seemingly upon the face of the precipice.
In that position, between hope and fear,
he lived what seemed years, until rescue
came in the shape of a lasso, and he was
drawn up to the top of the bridge, where
he fainted from exhaustion. — Shcnan
doah Herald.
THE PYRAMIDS.
Mr. G. W. French, of Philadelphia,
presented some curious facts concerning
the results of the astronomical and geo
metrical investigations of the great
Pyramid before a meeting of New York
ministers. The chief purpose of the
speaker was to prove that the Pyramid
records the prophetic history of Judaism
and Christianity. The Pyramid was
built before idolatry made its way into
the world, and, as was claimed, contains
no symbol of false worship, and this
confirmed the Scriptural knowledge of
God held by Abimelech, King of Gesar,
and of the Egyptian Pharaoh in the time
of Abraham. According to Mr. French,
the narrow passageway in the Pyramid
symbolizes the voyage of life, which
slopes downward to a dark hole beneath
the earth's surface and upward to the
King's chamber," where the temper
ature stands unchangeably at 68 de
grees. The horizontal passage symbol- |
izes the departure of the Jews from |
Egypt and also their rejection of the I
Christ. Tuen the perpendicular ascent, !
the" overhanging wall, and a particular j
step in the pyramidal sign language
mean that the higher a man rises toward
the divine and the heavenly the more
-(3 .• V
room there is for him, though the as
cent may be difficult. The inscription
on the Pyramid was taken by the lect
urer to mean the unity of God and the
fulfillment of certain prophecies in 1881
and in view of the events of last year he
thought these symbols of the Pyramid
were something more than mere coin
cidence. The prophecies of Daniel con
cerning the destruction of Jerusalem in
seventy weeks and the 2,300 days were
said to bring out 1881, and also the
Apocalyptic vision of 1260 from the
Mohammedan hegira in 621 give the
same date. But the Pyramid shows a
plus 1881, which includes part of the
current year, so that great religious
events may be looked for in this year of
grace 1882. A symbol of the Messiah
was also found in the capstone, as " the
head of the corner." These theories of
the symbolism of the Pyramid have
often been discussed before, and they
are very interesting, but general opinion,
we believe, has concluded that they are
simply an ingenious leading up of cer
tain facts and figures to fit preconceived
and already accepted ideas.
Joi/lee had a dinner party, and, not
withstanding his having a boil on his
dexter hand, he insisted on taking the
head of the table and carving the tur
key. After he had been awkwardly jag
ging away at the deceased bird his wife
rather petulantly remarked: " The way
you go to work at that, Mr. Jollie, one
would think you were a carpenter."
' ' What tradesman could I better emu
late with a hand-sore ?" was the quick
reply.
There had been a seeming coolness
between the lovers. One day Emily's
schoolmate ventured to refer to the sub
ject, and asked her : " When did you see
Charley last?" "Two weeks ago to
night" " What was he doing ?" "Try
ing to get over the fence." "Did he
appear to be much agitated?" "So
much so," replied Emily, "that it took
all the strength of papa's new bulldog to
hold him. "
After Oliver Wendell Holmes lect.
ured at Haverhill, Mass., he called on
an old schoolmate who was dealing in
stoves. " Did you ever attend ■
school V asked the poet. " Yaas." "Do
you remember a boy named Oliver Wen
dell Holmes ?" " Naw." " Ever heard
the name?"' "Naw." The interview
ended.
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STREET SCENES IN MADRID.
The Madrilenos offer not a flat, but
rather an extremely round, contradiction
to this general and accepted idea of the
national appearance. Slenderness is the
exception with them. Their city is a
forced flower in the midst of mountain
lands, and the men themselves rejoice
in a rotund and puffy look of success,
which also partakes of the hot-house
character. They are people of leisure,
and, after their manner, of pleasure.
How they swarm in their cafes, in the
Gate of the Sun — where they keep up the
Moorish custom of calling waiters by
two claps of the hands — or on the one
great thoroughfare, Calle de Alcala, ©r
in the bull-ring of a Sunday ! They
never "sleep, or, if they do, others take
their places in the public resorts. The
clamor of the streets, and even the snarl
ing cry of the news- venders — "La Cor
respondencia," or "El Democrata-a"
— is kept up until the small hours ; and
at 5 or 6 the restless stir begins again
with the silver tinkling of fleet mule
bells. There are no night-howling
watchmen in Madrid ; but the custom
of street-hawking is rampant in Spain ;
and here, in addition to the newsman,
we have the wail of the water-criers min
istering to an unquenchable popular
thirst, the lottery-ticket sellers, the wax
match peddlers, and a dozen others.
The favorite bird of the country is a
kind of a lark called alondra, much hung
in cages outside of the windows, whence
they utter — with that monotonous recur-
rence which seems a fixed principle of
all things Spanish — a hard, piercing
tripple note impossible to ignore. This
loud, persistent "twit, twit-twit," re
sembling at a distance the click of cas
tinets, begins about daybreak, and gives
a most discouraging notion of the Span
ish musical ear.
Of course there is home life and there
is family affection in Madrid, but the
stranger naturally does not see a great
deal of these ; and then it may be doubt
ed whether they really exist to the same
extent as in most other civilized capitals.
It becomes wearisome to make sallies
upon the town, and day after day find
so much of the population trying to di
vert itself or killing time in the cafes
and clubs. The feeling deepens that
they resort to these for want of a suffi
ciently-close interest in their homes
More than that, they do not seem really
to be amused. Even their language
fails to express the amusement idea ; the
most that anything can be for them, in
the vernacular, is " entertaining." Still
the choice of light diversion is varied
enough. Opera flourishes in winter, in
spring and summer the bull-fight ; thea
ters are always in blast ; cocking-mains
are kept up. Hitherto gambling has
been another favorite pastime until
checked by the authorities. Not con
tent with all this, the Madrilenos seek
in lottery shops that excitement which
Americans derive from drinking-saloons.
The brightly-lighted lottery agency oc
curs as frequently as that other indica
tion of disease, the apothecary's win
dow, in American cities. People of all
classes hover about them both by day
and by night. Posters confront you
with announcements of the Child Jesus
Lottery, the lottery to aid the Asylum
of Our Lady of the Assumption, or the
National, which is drawn thrice a month,
with a chief prize of $32,000, and some
400 other premiums. There are many
small drawings beside constantly going
on ; not a day passes, in fact, without
your being solicited by wandering deal
ers in these alluring chances at least
half a dozen times. — George P. Lathrop,
in Harper's Magazine.
OF FEAR.
Wi is said that the Emperor Charles
the Fifth, reading an epitaph, " Here
lies one who never knew fear," re
marked, "then he never snuffed a can
dle with his fingers." It is certainly a
somewhat absurd, though a favorite
claim for a popular hero, that " he never
knew fear." No one possessing human
nerves and brain could say this with
truth. That a brave man never yields to
the emotion may be true enough ; but to
say that at no period of his life he ex
perienced fear is simply impossible. As
Lord Lytton expresses it :
It eliamea man not to fee! man's mortal fear.
It shames man only if tUat fear subdue.
There is a story of a young recruit in
the "Thirty Years' War' r going into
action for the first time in his life in the
highest spirits. "Look at Johann," re
marked one of his comrades, as the
troops were drawn up ready to charge,
"he is full of jokes ; how brave he is."
"Not at all," replied the veteran ad
dressed; "he knows nothing of what is
coming. You and I, old comrade, are
far braver; we sit still on our horses
though we are terribly afraid."
Fear certainly is one of the most ir
rational of the passions. It is not
always excited by the presence of danger.
Men who cau be cool and collected in
cases of real peril will tremble at some
fanciful alarm. The Duke of Schomberg
could face an enemy with ready courage,
but fled from a room if he saw a cat in
it, A very brave French officer faulted
at the sight of a mouse. The author of
the "Turkish Spy" states that if he had
a sword in his hand he would rather en
counter a lion in the desert than be alone
in a room with a spider. Many people
have similar fanciful antipathies, which
excite their fears in a manner real dan
ger would be powerless to do. Fear of
infection is a dread that embitters the
lives of many sensitive people. There is
a • legend of an Eastern dervish, who,
knowing that the plague was about to
visit a certain city, bargained with the
disease that only a specified number of
victims should fall. When twice the
number perished the plague explained
its apparent breach of contract by
explaining : "Fear killed the rest."
in ail times ot epidemics doc
tors can tell similar tales. Dur
ing the great plague of 1665-6 an
unfortunate man died purely from
fright ; a practical joker who met hitn
in the street pretended to discover the
fatal "spots" upon him, and the poof
man went home and died, not of the dis
ease, but of sheer terror. A long obitu
ary list might be compiled of the victims
of fear ; from the criminal in the middle
ages, who, reprieved after he had laid
his head on the block, was found to have
died ere the ax could touch him, down
to the poor nun mentioned by Horace
Walpole, whose disreputable abbess lit
erally "frightened her to death" by vis
iting her at night and telling her she was
dying. — London News.
HE MISSED THAT
Just before the Michigan Third In
fantry entered upon the red-hot fight at
Fair Oaks a private in one of the com
panies stepped forward to his Captain
and said :
" Captain, are we going to sail in?"
"I expect we are."
"And some of us will get killed?"
"Like as not."
"Then I'd like to speak to the Chap
lain a minute."
"What for?"
"I don't feel prepared to die, Cap
tain."
"But you can't leave your company.
You must take your chances, whether
you are prepared or not. That's what
you enlisted for. "
" Y'-e-s, I s'pose so, M drawled the man
as he craned his neck to look for rebels
down in the woods; "and I was just fool
enough to diskiver that Uncle Sam didn't
care a copper where I went to after I'd
been shot out of his service ! You bet
he doesn't get any more recruits from
our town till that pint is settled !"
THE HEN CONVENTION— .I FAJBLB,
A fox who found hard picking hi a cer
tain neighborhood one day visited a far
mer's dog, and said :
" I have lately undergone a change of
heart, and I wish you to make known
the fact to your master's fowls. They
treat me as if I was a murderer, and it
really hurts my feelings to see them hur
ry into the coop at sunset. The farmer,
too, seems to distrust me, for he has
made the coop so tight that I cannot
find a single knothole. What sort of a
way is that to treat a fox, who is doing
his best to earn an honest living ? "
" I presume you would like to state
your case to the fowls in person ?" ob
served the dog.
"That's it — that's the very idea," re
plied the fox. "Say to them that I
should like to meet them in convention
under this tree to-morrow at noon. I
will then explain my feelings toward
them, and trust that the fox and the
fowls will hereafter live in the greatest
harmony. Indeed, the only difference
between us is the fact that I have no
wings, and they shouldn't hold me in
suspicion on that account."
The dog agreed to act as mediator,
and at noon next Jay the fox rrept care
fully through the weeds to the rendez
vous and crouched down to await the
coming of the fowls. There was pres
ently heard a great whirr and clatter,
and two-score hens' alighted in the
branches of the tree over the fox.
" The convention will now proceed to
business," said an old hen, as she peered
down upon the fox.
"Just bo," grinned the fox. "Please
come down and we will proceed."
" Thanks ; but if it's all the same to
you we'd rather you'd come up here,"
replied the hen.
"But I can't fly."
"And we are poor runners."
The fox not being able to fly up, and
the hens refusing to fly down, the for
mer was skulking off, when he met the
dog, who said :
"My friend, the difference between
undergoing a change of heart and desir
ing to undergo a change of diet and po
sition is so obscure that many people
never stop to fish for it. As a fox you
were respected for your cunning ; as a
hypocrite even the old hens despise
you."
A STRANGE CUSTOM.
The respectable women of Thibet al
ways appear in public with their faces
painted black, so as to disguise their
charms and thus prevent frail men from
the perils of too great admiration. Be
fore going out of doors they invariably
rub their faces over with a black glute
nous varnish, something like currant
jelly in appearance. The object being
to render themselves as unattractive as
possible, they daub this composition
over every feature, so as to render their
faces as unlike those of human beings
as possible. Mr. Hue in his travels in
the country ascertained that the singular
custom had its origin in the decree of a
Lama King, some 200 years ago. This
King, being a man of austere habits,
was desirous of checking the license
which prevailed among the people, and
which had even spread to the priests of
the Buddhist monasteries to such an
extent as to relax their discipline , issued
an edict that no woman should appear
in public otherwise than with her face
daubed in the manner described. Severe
temporal and spiritual penalties enforced
the decree among them, even the terrible
wrath of Buddha. Tradition says that
women were perfectly resigned au<l
obedient, and that, far from the edict
giving rise to a petticoat rebellion, the
practice was cheerfully adopted and has
been faithfully observed down to ooru r
own time. Now, it is considered a point
of religious creed and evidence of a
6pirit of devotion, the women who daub
their faces the most being the most re
ligious. It is only in the large towns
that women are seen in the streets with
unpainted faces.
DAMPEN TTIR A in.
\Ve can hardly too alien saggi st the
importance of providing n;np!e moisture
in all rooms heated by stoves, lamace*,
steam pipes or hot-water pipes. There
are sound and scientific reasons for this,
as well as in the results of practical ex
perience. Every degree of heat added
to the atmosphere in a room gives it a
power of absorbing and secreting moist
ure. The air in a room twenty by twen
ty feet and ten feet high, at 32 degrees,
holds, secretes about one and one-third
pints of water. The same air heated at
70 degrees secretes upward of two
quarts of water, ftud unless this is sup.
plied it is hung, for more water, ab
sorbs it from every accessible source,
from the furniture, from our bodies, and
especially from the breathing organs —
the mouth, throat and lungs, leaving
them dry and husky. Therefore, every
time the air in the room is changed by
the admission of fresh, cold air and heat
ed to 70 degrees two quarts of water
should be evaporated into the room.
The strong objections some have to
warm-air heaters have arisen mainly
from this cause. la using furnace heat
ers we always put into the hot-air cham
ber extra water pans beside any that are
supplied by the manufacturers, and take
good care to always have them filled
with water. In stove-heated rooms
there should usually be an evaporating
surface of water equal to one square foot
for every twelve feet square of rioorine:,
and more if the water is not on a hot
place enough to keep it rapidly evapo
rating. Plants in a room are mainly de
stroyed, or have a sickly growth, be
cause the warm air becomes too dry and
sucks out the very juice of the plants.
In a large room a large towel frequently
wet and wrung so as not to drip, and
hung over a chair back near the stove,
will make a marked difference in the
comfortable feeling and healthfulness of
the atmosphere.
SAYINGS OF BAYARD TAYLOR.
"To have learned not to hurry is to
have doubled one's capacity for work."
" If you want to succeed as a newspa
per correspondent, write just the things
that your readers would look for and
talk about if they were in your place,
and be very careful about putting your
opinions to your letters. People want
the facts, and to be allowed to form
their own opinions. You have all the
world with you if you state simply facts;
everybody has to agree with facts,
whether they will or not."
"An art critic, who hiiuself paints,
judges everything from the standpoint
of his own methods and prejudices.
Still, an art critic should practically
know enough about the technique of art
to understand its difficulties ; he should
paint just enough to be reckoned a clever
amateur, but not enough to be reckoned
a clever artist."
"The English language is gradually
assimilating all the vital words in all lan
guages. It looks very much as if it was
getting itself ready to be the universal
language."
THE AMATEUR TENOR.
Who is this man ?
This is an amateur singer.
Isn't he too sweet for anything ?
He is indeed too oppressively charm
ing.
Aren't his clothes lovely ?
His clothes are indeed lovely, and he
is a most gifted being.
Can he sing well ?
Oh, no ; not particularly well, but he
tries to sing everything.
Does he know anything about music.
He knows all the musical terms, and
can use them skillfully.
Where does he sing ?
Oh, he sings at amateur concerts, and
is very much admired by all our young
ladies.
Is he a nice young man ?
Oh, yes, he is a real nice young man,
only he cannot sing. — New York Mus
ical Score.
A WONDERFUL COW.
In view of the fact that there is at
present a general revival of interest in
everything pertaining to the dairy and
its products, the following from an ex
change will be interesting to butter
ruakeßs :
The Am: mm trotter is of recent ori
gin, and, daring the lifetime of compara
tively young rren now living, has re
duced the record from 2:30 to about
2:10 per mile, or nearly twenty seconds,
or, as our business men would say, over
8 per cent.
This spirit of progress has not been
confined to the breeding and training of
roadster horses, but American breeders
of dairy cattle have made equally as
creditable a record ; and if breeders on
the other side of the Atlantic have made
careful tests that will compare with the
following we should like to publish their
records :
The best yearly butter record is that
of Eurotas 2,454, owned by A. B. Dar
ling, of Ramsey. N. J. Daring the
test of Eurotas 2,454, which occupied
eleven months and six days (ending Oct,
15, 1880), she maje 778 pounds of but
ter from 7,525 pounds of milk, averaging
one pound of butter from less than ten
pounds of milk. In the month of June,
1880, she made eighty-eight pounds of
butter. The monthly record of Ehirotae
2,454 has been exceeded by Lady Mell
second 1,795, owned by Charles F. Milk,
of Springfield, 111. Lady Mell second
1,795 dropped her calf in March, and
her milk \va^. kept separate, and the
cream therefrom churned by itself, fron.
the 15th day of April to the 15th day o!
June (sixty-one days), during which
period her cream produced 183 pounds
of butter — ninety pounds of butter pel
month of thirty Jays — twenty ,one
pounds per week, or three pounds per
| day. Lady Mell second 1,795 was l>
years old when the test was made, and
j gave during the trial an average ol
en quarts of milk per day. The
best weekly yields of the above-named
cows have been exceeded by Jersey Belle
of Scitnate 7,828, now dead. This cow
has a well-authet>ticated record of
twenty-five pounds and two ounces in
one week. iiic tiiree cows above
named have the best yearly, monthly
and weekly butter record*, and we con
fidently expect, at no late date, that the
records will be improved. Perform
ances, and not fancy points, are the
essential matters that attract the atten
tion of the practical Jersey breeder of
the day, who first inquires as to the
number of fourteen to twenty-pound
cows in the pedigree of the sire or dam
that he wishes to purchase.
A GOOD REASON.
They are two lovers — he 10 and she 8.
It is a June evening, and they are sit
ting with their arms around each other
on the lower step of the front stoop of
her father's house. Bill Tomkins, the
boy next door, comes along about that
time, sees them sitting there, gives an
audible chuckle, and goes off to summon
other boys to come and witness the
spectacle. Then the adolescent Romeo
turns to his Juliet and says with an ex
pression of offended dignity :
"Lizzie, I don't Tike Bill Tomkins."
" Why ? " murmurs Lizzie.
'"Cos," returns her lover, "he's so
regardless."
E. IiVI.WER LYTTON'S TEMPER.
In his recently published "S< in • Ac
counts of My Life and Writings.
Archibald Alison says: D
visit to Oxford an incid
descriptive of Sir E. Bulwer Lytton'.i
character that, as char • •■ t ■■>
eminent a man, I cannot forbear men
tioning it. It had been previously ar
ranged that the persons who were to re
ceive degrees the first day were to be
those npon whom the honor was to lw
bestowed rather in consideration of
their rank or political position than
their literary eminence, and accordingly
the Duke of Cambridge, Lord Eglia
ton, Mr. Secretary Walpole, Sir John
Pakington, and others of the same suit
were installed the first day, and the
purely literary or scientific characters,
such as Bulwer, Aytoun, Sir Roderick
Murchison and myself, were put oft' to
the second. It never entered into my
head to take umbrage at this arrange
ment, which in the circumstances.
seemed proper, but it was otherwise
with Sir Edward. In the evening, as
Lady Alison and I were sitting at tea
in our hotel, a message came request
ing me to see him, which I immediately
did, and the first thing he said was :
"Well, Sir Archibald, what are you
going to do ? lam off in the first train
for London. I never wanted any of
their degrees; it was their own do
ing sending for me, and I am resolved
not to submit to the slight now put on
us. What! to think of postponing such
men as you and me t<> a parcel I
political drudges, who will never 1 ■
heard of five years after their deatli !
The thing is intolerable! I hope you
are not going to submit to it." During
tliis vehement harangue he was im
patiently quaffing the fumes of a big
Turkish pipe, the volumes of which
came out between each fresh ebulition
of wrath. Astounded at this extraor
dinary indignation. I could only en
deavour to elude and mollify a wrath
evidently too violent to be encountered
in front. "Do you not see," said I,
"my dear Sir Edward, that the directors
of the proceedings have paid us the
highest compliment in postponing our
installation to the second day? On the
first, those were selected who were re
commended for the most part by then
rank or position, to-morrow those will
come on who are chosen only for their
merit." "Its all very well," answered
he, "for cold-blooded historians to
think so. but we of a lighter turn feel
otherwise. I shall certainly go off to
night."* By degrees, however, be be
came mollified, and consented to re
main to be installed next day, and go
with us to Blenheim on the day follow
ing. He wrote, however, a letter of re
monstrance to Lord Derby on the oc
casion ; and in the evening I received
from his Lordship a very courteous
note saying that he had borne no part
in the arrangements for the ceremony.
Mrs. Wallis Yates is the wife of an
Austin merchant in failing circum
stances. She is extremely thin, but,
nevertheless, attends balls and parties
in a very low-necked dress. She at
tracted the attention of two young men
at a ball not long since. One of them
6aid to the other: "Do you see how
Mrs. Wallis Yates is dressed?" "Yes.
her husband ought to tell her to do
like he does in his business." "Cover
up the deficiencies so that the public
cannot see them?" — Texas Siftings.
An excellent liniment for neuralgia
is made of sassafras, oil of origanum
and a half-ounce of tincture of capsi
cum, with half a pint of alcohol. Soak
nine yards of flannel in this mixture,
wrap it around the head and then in
sert the head in a haystack till death
is to your relief. — Laramie Boom
erang.
In* England thirty swans are taken
from the Thames and killed each year
about Christmas time. The Queen has
foi*r, the Prince of Wales two and the
sisters, cousins and aunts of the royal
family one each.
Mrs. Smith, Back of the Church, En
glanu, was the actual address of a letter
found in an English postoffice.
HAIR BALSAM!
The best and most
economical hair dres- X
sing, and made from*
materials thatarebeß-H
leficial to the hair and B
\;c:l?, Parker's Hair
"Ba!san isVrsrAyes
teemed everywhere a
for its excellence and ||
superior cle.vi.'Lsrs. m
I It Never Fails to Rasters the Youthful Caiar |
and lustre to gray or faded hair, is elegantly per- 1
fumed and is warranted to remove dandruff and I
itching of the scalp, & prevent falling of thrtoir. ■
50c. »cd |1 tlzes, at dealers In dregs. g
DRESSING CHILDREN.
Notice the children in any town in the
United States as they go to school daring
the cold winter weather. The boys have
on good woolen socks and boots thai
reach half way to the knee, and over both
good thick pantaloons. The girls wear
shoes, generally light leather, and their
legs are bare — have at least one thick
ness of stockings — from ankle to knee.
Rarely do the little darlings have a scarc
ity of covering for the shoulders and
body, and muffs to keep the hands warm,
but the lower extremities are so thinly
clad that, from ankle to knee, they had
nearly as well be bare. Why is this ?
There is but one answer — fashion — that
senseless, murderous tyrant that has
slain its millions of women and children
in America. All mothers know of the
evil of which we speak, and of the ne
cessity of keeping the lower extremities
warm in order to insure good circnlafioo.
of the blood and a healthy body, but
how many are there who would not rath
er sacrifice their children's lives, or make
shattered invalids, than to go one inch
beyond what custom or fashion dictates?
If mothers would dress their girls as
sensibly and as comfortably as they do
the boys a few years would witness a
marked change for the better in regard
to the health of women. The ittentioa
of fathers as well as mothers, ought to be
directed to this important m;.:ter. It is
a lamentable fact that American women
have the poorest health of any women in
civilized countries. If they were dressed
sensibly in childhood, and would, what
older, wear good heavy shoes, not two
sizes too small, the evil complained of
would in a generation mainly disappear.
AN ALLEGORY.
A lawyer, an enthusiastic admirer of
the late John J. Crittenden, of Kea
tucky, contributes to the Springfield
Republican an anecdote illustrating ids
extraordinary power over a jury:
Mr. Crittenden was engaged in de
fending a man who had been indicted
for a capital offense. After an elaborate
and powerful defense, he closed his ef
fort by the following striking and beau
tiful allegory:
"When God, in His eternal counsel,
conceived the thought of man's eraatioß,
He called to Him the three minisiem
who wait constantly upon His throne —
Justice, Truth and Mercy— and thus ad
dressed them: ' Shall we make man?*
" Then said Justice, 'Oh God i make
him not, for he will trample upon Tfey
laws.' Truth made answer also, 'Ok
God ! make him not, for he will pollute
Thy sanctuaries.'
"But Mercy, dropping upon her
knees, and looking up through her tears,
exclaimed, 'Oh God ! make him. I will
watch over him and surround him with
my care through all the dark paths
which he may have to tread.' Then God
made man, and said to him, 'Oh man ?
thou art the child of Mercy; go and deal
with thy brother.'"
The jury, when he finished, was in
tears, and, against evidence and whai
must have been their own convietiajw,
brought in a speedy verdict of not
guilty.
THE OLD TET.
"Judge, don't be hard on an old veV*
pleaded a drunk who was arraigned a
the Detroit Police Court.
" Were you in the war ? "
"I was, your Honor."
" What regiment ? "
"No regiment. I sloshed around bj
myself. "
"What army were you attached to?"
"None of 'em."
" Were you in any battles ? "
"Heaps of 'em, your Honor."
"Give me the name of any one bai
tle."
" Bunker Hill, "was the prompt replj.
"Bunker Hill ! Why that battle vat
fought over 100 years ago ! " exclaimed
the court.
" Of course she was, your Honor — of
course she was. Do you think Yd 1m
mean enough to ask you to go light cm
me for having sloshed around in any «f
these riots of the last fifty years ? *
A skeptical hearer once said to a
Baptist minister : " How do you recon
cile the teachings of the Bible with the
latest conclusions of science?" "1
haven't seen this morning's papers,*
naively replied the minister. 4I What
are the latest conclusions of modern
eeience ? "
The Patent Office has issued patent*
on 591 different styles of spring-beds,
and yet the number of men who com*
in at midnight and pull off their boot*
with the fire screen is on the increase.
The pay of the German soldier ha*
been raised to 2] cents per day, s*u«i fa*
is now expected to throw both shon]<fe»
out of joint in his ambition to secure *
military gait.
L* India the proportion oi non-Chris
tians to Christians is 250 to 1. Oi tke
1,000,000 Christians, 750,000 are Romas
Catholics.
Last words of Fontenello : "I do Be*
suffer, my friends, but I feel a eerferm
difficulty in existing."
Always there is a black spot in <rar
6unshine — it is the shadow of ourselves.
.<