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TO WOMEN Backing a Husband Into a Dress Suit By Helen Rowland 1 told you so when you accoptod "no better than we are"—but that's no JJolshevIkl! The Wife Speaks. What dear? Tea, you'll HAVE to wear it Oh, yes. 1 know the Smythes are reason why you should go to their dinner party looking like Every man there will be in evening clothes— What, dear? • Certainly, you'll have to shave again! The idea! Yes. 1 KNOW you "shaved this morning," but you can't announce that at the dinner table. No, I'm NOT cross. I'm simply trying to be reasonable—whnt. dear? No, I haven't the slightest idea where you keep your "hard-boiled" shirts. They ought to be in the same drawer with your "sort-boned" shirts, oughtn't they? Wait a minuté. I'll help you look. Good heavens! Not in there! That's the table linen! DON'T swear so. Darling! Here they are! Well, what is it NOW! Oh. darling! How DID you cut youreelf that way? You poor thing! Walt. I'll get the alum—and the court-plaster. There, there! Does it hurt you now? ~ What is it, dear? No, I haven't seen your studs. Where did you put them last time. Well, why can't you wear those? Oh, 1 see! They're for your dinner coat. Aren't men funny? Their whole Idea of being dressed" consists in wearing the right buttons! What, dear? Yes that's YOUR shirt. 1 know, because I bought it myself. Well, If that shirt "rides up" it must be because you're getting fat! Oft, I didn't say ANYTHING! IDo stop swearing, darling! No, I don't know where you keep your dress-ties. No. I haven't seen your patent-leathers. , Well, If you'll wait until I get this thing hooked I'll help you find—Oh, what Is It? What IK It. darling? My! How vou frightened me! I thought you'd cut yourself again. But how can your waistcoat be CHOKING you? Walt! i ll unlatch It at the back. There! Can you breathe now? DON'T swear so, darling! Well, If you'd wear your dress clothes a little oftener you wouldn t ha\e ( auch terrible trouble "assembling yourself" whenever you HAVE to wear 1 them! Ob. yes. you do! I simply have to blindfold you and HACK yon into even ing clothes every time you put them on! Walt a minute. I'll fasten your cuff links. Yes, I'll find your hat. No, I HAVEN'T "pawned all your handkerchiefs." Tea, I'll find your gloves. Yes, Y know where your muffler is. Y«s, you look all— Why, DARLING! YY>u look perfectly STLNMNG. I'm going to kiss you this minute! If you only knew how handsome you look in evening dress you d never wear anything else! And so few men CAN wear it effectively! IWttat's that you say—about "signing a German peace.' You '-'know how it feels?" Oh. well, do hurry! about the War now, you beautiful old bear! Curtain. dear We haven't time to trflk Tuberculosis Has Killed More Men Than All Wars of History. i ! Tuberculosis has destroyed moro lives than all the wars in history. Yet if we are wary and alert we can adapt some of the enemy's meth ods to our own uses ami. prepare our bodies to resist and entrench against the onslaughts and in vasions of germs. Before the body yields at any point to an attack of the hosts of tuberculosis germs it must first M reduced to a weakened con dition rendering it Incapable of active resistance. This condition is usually brought about by neglect of such as colds, 1 ronchltis, run-down conditions, over fatigue and numerous other states of iil health usually known as slight in dispositions. Physical preparedness consists first of an Inventory of our physical or bodily resources. We should know our strong and our weak points. Having recognized these weak ' points every thing should be done to strengthen them. The best defence against tubercu losis Is to discourage It by maintaining a well prepared and well maintained physical resistance. New York, March 31.—Each pur ehaser of a bortd in the third Liberty loan campaign, which starts April 6. wilt bave his name inscribed on the Hoalth Questions Answered. Mrs. T. T. asks: "Can you tell me what causes a ringworm?" It is caused by a small plant which grows in the skin and it is highly con tagious. It usually begins as a small pimple and spreads in a round patch. HONOR ROLL FOR LIBERTIES. honor roll of the community in which he lives, anti will be allowed to display on "honor flag" according to an .an nouncement made here today by the Liberty loan committee of the New York federal reserve district._ cold in a child's bead child ÜÄS TiyKondoris for Hie (at no charge to you) PHILADELPHIA POLICE CHARGED WITH CRIME Government May Start Big Clean-Up in City. Washington, March 31.—Philadel phia's police force is flatly charged with corruption and partnership in crime, by the commission on training camp activities, in a report which Sec retary Daniels has forwarded to the governor of Pennsylvania and the mayor of Philadelphia with the urgent request that they accept the co-opera tion of the navy and marine corps, "for such a cleaning up in Philadel phia as imperatively demanded." Thousands of young men are in training for the navy and marine corps in Philadelphia and according to the commission, no other city in the coun try has failed to meet the requirements of the army and navy, as to moral con ditions. Lists of alleged disorderly houses with street addresses and other items of specific information are given In the tratning camp commission's report made public tonight. It was submit ted to Secretary Daniels by Chairman Raymond B. Fosdick, after an extend ed investigation. "Reports reaching this offiee from every city in the country in the neigh borhood of any army or navy camp," says the report, "show that nowhere else are conditions so intolerable. Many attempts have been made in the past six months to secure action through the local authorities. I am convinced that the fundamental rea son for the failure of these attempts is the Intimate connection of responsible officials with those who profit by the continued existence of vicious condi tions. For this reason, it seems me, to be. hopeless to expect any real improvement until the navy depart j ment takes drastic action to protect , men In the s-rvicé, while oil liberty in b< Philadelphia." HUNS ACTIVE BEHIND LINE. With the American Army in France, March 31.—By the Associated Press. Even more activity was observed be hind the German lines opposite the American front on the Toul sector to day. An entire battalion was seen on the marpb this morning. Infantry at points were being shifted about, while ; the cavalry also was seen again. Nu ! merous automobiles of members of the j German staff made their appearance behind the lines. APPROVES COURT MARTIAL. I Athens. March 31.—Public opinion in 'Greece strongly approves the action of the court martial which on Friday sentenced to death the two Greek of ficers who were apprehended after be ing landed on the west coast of the Peloponnesus by a German submarine. The sentence of the court martial Is expected to have a salutary effect on those concerned in the activities of former King Constantine. HUNS LOSE SI PLANES. London. March 11. — Eighty-three enemy airplanes have been destroyed by British aviators since they began operations on the Italian front, says a British official communication is sued tonight. The Brltjsh have lost 10 machines in aerial fighting. Girl Girdles Globe to Get Separation Love has sent many a woman around the globe, but Mrs. Eleanor E. Smith is one of the few who have girdled it to secure divorce. Prominent in Hong Kong society and only woman member of the exclusive British Corinthian Yacht club, she set out for New York to drop lier former pilot when the Smith matrimonial bark went on the rocks. .Mr. Smith was just one tuck ahead in ttie h i K cruise for the port f divorce. Government to Control Production of Meat direction of the large packers," wrote the administrator, "or may even take the form of governmental operation of the packing establishments." Since the I'nlti <1 States entered the ar, allied purchases of meat for both vilian and military purposes have been consolidated and it is becoming saury for tills government to co ordinate them with orders for the American army and imvy to prevent nflicting execution. The result, Mr. llooker said, is practical domination of prices which was recognized in pork last September by rough assurance to swine producers of a minimum of .r»o for their product.,- Present indi cations are that beef purchases will b< increased soon to the point where they may affect prices materially. * More Exports Noodod. Pointing out that increased quanti les needed fur export must lie obtained ither by greater production or by re duction in civilian consumption, and probably by both, Mr. Hoover ex pressed the opinion that reduced con lunption can be had most equitably by oluntary sacrifice and moderate re traints such as meatless days, and niphatlcally disapproved any attempt 1 lessen consumption by increasing prices to the public. (Continued From Page Onck AID TO SWEDEN TRADE. Stockholm, March 31.—K. A. Wallen burg, former foreign minister, and Ills wife, have given 20,000,000 crowns for permanent fund to further religious, heritable, social and cultural work and to promote the commerce and in dustry of Sweden. Another million crowns was given to the municipal library at Stockholm. The gift for the permanent fund is the largest in the history of Sweden except that of Dr. Nobel. The GosSard Corset A Perfect Front A Perfect Back A Perfect Corset Oossards arc inimitable. Women of every figure can attain, in tlic new '«[»ring and summer (iossards, the silhouMte of Hu' mode with ils tapering waistline and ils flat back and bip line«. \Yn When you understand that every Oossard Gorsel offers inimitable style, a priceless all-day comfort, and a wearing service that alone is worth the price of the garment, you will realize why every woman who lmys a Ons sard is practicing corset economy in ifs truest sense. Priced at *2.00, *2.20, *2.75, *3.50, *5.00, *5.50 md up. , _____ £a*4 tufflrwt* issout«! lercsnitle GIVEN AT "SING" Community Meeting Success Despite Day's Demand on Voices. CHINESE SONGS NEXT Tunes of All Allies to Be Given on Program, Says DeLoss Smith. Special Easter music by the choir of the Church of the Holy Spirit varied the, program of the Community Sing held in the Missoula theater yesterday afternoon and gave an occasional touch to the affair. Entier the direction of E. tirlo Bangs the choir sung beauti fully and won hearty applause, fol lowed liy a unanimous vote of thanks. Bruno Chtlinskt, a talented yot*ig violinist, gave other extra numbers. Ills playing was enthusiastically received by the audience, and the young player had to respond twice to calls fur en core. The university orchestra, directed by Cecil Burleigh, offered a pleasing num ber between songs. Chorus Singing Effective. Though most of the singers had probably sung at. church services in the morning, the chorus singing was spirited. "When Johnny Conics March ing Home" almost took the doors off the theater, and "Over There" was given effectively. Délais« Smith, director of the Sing, announced that at the next meeting, to he held on Sunday, April 14, songs of all the allies will he sung. "That includes the Chinese and the Japanese, too," he said. The audience laughed. "Don't smile," said the director. 'You will be surprised at the songs of -in oriental allies. They are good." WILL HAYS COMING WEST. Indianapolis, March 31.—Will H. Hays, chairman of the Republican Na tional committee, will leave here Tues day. midnight, on a western trip in the interests of the third Liberty loan. In addition to addressing Liberty loan gatherings, chairman Hays an nounced he would also meet members of the Republican National oommltti and state leaders. FOR LUMBAGO Try Musterole. See How Quic kly It Re lieves You just rub Musterole in briskly, and usually the pain is gone—a delicious, soothing comfort comes to take its place. Musterole is a dean, white ointment, made with oil of mustard. Use it instead of mustard plaster. Will not blister. Many doctors and nurses use Muster ole and recommend it to their patients. They will gladly tell you what relief it gives from sore throat, bronchitis, croup, stiff neck, asthma, neuralgia, congestion, pleurisy, rheumatism, lumbago, pains and aches of the back or joints, sprains, sore muscles, bruises, chilblains, frosted feet, colds of the chest (it often prevents pneumonia). Always dependable. 30 and (30c jars; hospital size $2.50. Not So BHter Foes as One Would Think When you rend about the "terrible rows" between Baron Von Kuehlnutnn. -email (.-reign minister, and Count Czernin, the Austrian premier, ent a little «alt Tiiey'II speak, at least. And here tln-.i are shaking hands at their list lociit meeting Czernin is the istitnl fellow who has turned from the camera. , j if tlie beauty of tile average mail's niilid Isn't more lovely tliun Ills fare it entitled to sympathy. • Sample Tobacco Kit These Sample Tobacco Kits Are on Display at the Follow- \ ing Cigar Stores: Kelley's Cigar Store Gleason Brothers John H. Hoyer & Co. Smoke House Frank Hogan's Cigar Store Send the Boys a Smoke 25c will send the hoys in the trenches one of these kits, containing 45c worth of tobacco and will pay fjr a postal card enclosed on which the soldier will acknowledge .re ceipt of the kit War Department makes no appropriation for tobacco. Soldiers can't buy tobaccö in France. The price is prohibitive, on account of the French tobacco tax. Gifts of tobacco are duty free. Say, old smoker, think how you would feel standing watch in a lonely aft«* hour and nothing to smoke, then give accordingly, just as you fed# from 25c to $25.00. Leave your gift and your name at the cigar store or send it to The Missoulian.OB " the blank form below. —— THE DAILY MISSOULIAN: In accordance with your offer to send popular brands of tobacco «id cigtf our soldiers in Europe in units of 50c packages, each for 25c, I enclose 4L, (Your Name)................—...........................,___ r - — » (Street Address) ________________ \ ^ (City and State) _____________;.......—, sä " >■ • ■ . .. y ■ » ■**-■ rnmrnm ■ ï Wjftfo Ho Hum! Missoula Yawns and Gets Up Earlier. Though new bonnets and special music did their best to stimulate Interest. Missoula preachers faced yawning audiences at tholr Easter services yesterday morning. Daylight saving was to blame. The night lost an hour after mid night. and beauty sleeps were cut short. It was a sleepy day. ■ Otherwise, however, the change in time was accomplished easily enough. Of course, the inevitable young man forgot to chunge his watch and so was late in arriving to take his girls' new clothes to church. There were, naturally enough, a few missed meals and tardy arrivals for engagements. And downtown clocks (many of them) held to the old time. Rut GOOD-BYE BACKACHE, KIDNEY AND BLADDER TROUBLE! For centuries alt over the world i GO ED MEDAL Haarlem Oll ha« af forded relief In thousands upon Uious u nds of cases of latno back, lumbago, sciatica, rheumatism, gall stones, gravel and all other offert ions of the kidneys, liver, stomach, blnddet* and (i tiled organs. It sctH quickly. It does tho work. It cleanses your kidneys und purifies the blood. It makes a new man, n new woman, of you. It frequently wards off attacks of the dre.ul and fatal disease« of the kid neys. It often completely currs the distressing diseases of tho organs of the body, allied with tlio bladder and kidneys. Bloody or cloudy mine, «'di luent or "brick-dust" Indicate an un healthy condition. tii* SiB : the heavens, bright Then proval of the near Huge Increase Report of U. London, Saturday, Etrok' treasury statement for year ending today »bow* a I £707,234,515. an increase over ceding year of £133,80033, Nearly all sources of revenu increases except those from which dropped £4,322,000. - The chief Increases wer front excess profits and £34,471 from the Income tax. Expenditures amounted to £M 221,405 as compared with £2,108,17 710 last year. National war brought in £614,215,000. , ! Do not delay a minute If your 1 aches or you are sore across the ! or have difficulty when urinating, to your druggist at once and get a 1 of imported GOLD MEDAL Oil Capsules. They are pleasant easy to take. They dissolve la stomach and the kidneys soak ui oil like a sponge does water, thoroughly cleanse and wash ont bladder and kidneys and throw oft inflamallon which Is the cause trouble. Your druggist wUl ol refund your money If you are not Isflcd after a few days' use. only the pure, originel OOLD M Haarlem Oil Capsules. None genuine.—Adv.