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Bubble and Squeak By B. L. TAYLOR With m O.-m t-e u-rub- ai 1 11. t. Hi l';irie, I will liny you a parrot tn talk in when 1 iim busy, he IVrhaps It would say M'lui Miitm witiy, .in. I ih it would l i- a nice change. If : in n Ini-niakiT emit avored to lic ;i. cording to his own max im. In1 W'Hilil ce;i ;i tr t iiM.i'ii! i i i than inost men. wi i liw without .my philosophy ,.t .ill. T!.r ir.R ilia! II Is b tttr t) It all oli! man's ilarliai; II all a oiiiii; in. in s M,ie was never wntti'ii tiy a tiu'iliial man, lor sm li a man would know thit a man who is worn out phy.se illy iloesn't want a darling, hut a IiniM'. A yotiuu woinaii w mill more likely lie an old mans slave. A vouim man Is often a , ! i J' 1 ( I ' i oung woman s slave tliere is happiness in reciprocal hondace. too; and a stale i I J! I '! ! Tla ie Is this to be said for inedioi i i f y : It provides for tlnn-e dependent upon it, while g nlus s.u rilb i s all lor an idea. .1 i He - A mode .iliiiiiiiii.itii.il io She A iJieat pease, rather. st man Is rn a woin ill in line, anxiety and s'is- Win l) a woman Is r' din ed I talktiu only .unmon sens.- t tier In ib' ai ii'laili'. lin es, she t r hi r ii i ! h i l"i to Peii.e lass as pa-.-e. or is badly di.-iiluuioii'' Willi life. V. alih often man's 'lU-arit y ; What e.M'llses II. ai e.'UtU lies a poverty some- A "friendly inter a euphemism lor curiosity. w Al. l I.H I'l. A' K r.i ' is otten impudem l: l r it'l l:. Disprunt lemer.t. "A murrain si izi- tl.is -otu.t r ft I : . 1 1 1 r i k: my l.n .isi, I i i- ule'i'l. All. iniia . 1 1 (i l . . I ill lie slawe Aie i 1. 1 . 1 1'.-tii-.l lv li. e iiiailamu mull. 'I'l i v in.ilv' a tie-si uiiimIIv inu, Alld line IS ilenlelleil l.y II e illll. Cull at e was w 1 1 1 ' 1 1 1 u inle iiiii i' . lait new 'l i e l'l.ibsdiii's an- i rowiiin; in. Tl v nerrun tl:e i huh rl l.all. And I si 11 . a nil i I l . i all s, I lit' I . I ' I. li ii I l.e I i 'I V 1 1 hal. M .:si i I., ii 1 1. 1 i up six (limi ts III .sl.Ol'S. Ami i'm n in II, e ualn iy A ii. . , i:t si'.il is l.ai .l In s in. Ali'W, .iti'lt. 111'' Ihi.ii k Mlsle - Tie I '1. ilist in, -s aii' riuwiiiiu in. I i. I '.'l rial .1 SI:. l w is all He tn. hut iite e I I ml l.i I ii In it I s. It'. II .s I'i.i s, an Know ii 1 1. en. st'.iMl nri'W, Well It iiinl.i'.l, ui'Mii iii slu. si. ell. N.iW, II 1 1 1 y In si e ti use ..l M 1 i an't i:-t In, a laill liu Anni'inii i'S S. l. i i. Im .lav s. Tie I'l. ll. sillies ille rluUillllK III. i fraud opera, t 1 1 e nmli iliyniii s; 'II 'N ll.ii k like si I'l . tn see I l,e "lilliB." I ii.ivi' In si. II, . in hue 1 1 if InilllS 'I n Lay a seat lor an Hani;. l'i e nlie IS lllu.ll l.i'.i. line ttilli ll I f I till III e makes 11 e wl.l'ie urlil I I; in. Ami i -allure ili.esn t i mini tin- nun i, Wliii all I 'I. ilisi la's iinwilinu in. I la VP you joined the "See A merit a First Association," tin- mission of which is to turn tin American tourist '.Ide westward? "See Naples and ill.'!" tf you must, but "See America first!" The news ihnt "The House of Mirth ' Is to be ill aiual i.e.l will be haded Willi liellcht by all lovers of (be druuei. U.' course it will be necessary to add a plot, but any st.ee caip -tiler tan sup ply that, and what act. mi the novel lacks can be furnish. -ii with a pair ol low comedians and a male quai tctte. Letters of An Art Student. It will be recalled that Charles Dana (ibsoii sairitticil a I remeiuloiis income a tew months ai;o, to go abroad and 1 study art. How sue e slully this ex-' penmeni is wo k.n out ;s : hown in his letters to I, is Irleails at home, aj lew i f which we have been privileged to publish. Parts, Jan. 11!, lyuti. My Hear Chambers: Your splendid appieclate of me In Collier's funis an echo on this side of ! the Atlantic. I seem to It' as well known iu Paris as In New York. I s e liivself pointed out in thu cafe or on I the boulevard, or wherever 1 may go. With that modesty which you have spoken of as one of my traits, I pra seiitetl myself humbly before the o d French Academicians, informing them that I wished to study art from the b -ginning. 1 feared they might take me at in y word ami set me to drawing the figure, but they finally acknowledge I that they could teaeii me nothing about drawing, and advised me to login at once on color.' This I found extreme y Interesting, and all that I had Ima gined it. I have made a great many experiments on iny own urcouat, with startling results. Yesterday I discov ered that by mixing red and blue one Keia a rich purple. It was a revelation In Impressionism. I hastened to ihi old tiins'ers, my tctlthcrs. To my disap pointment they Wore Hot Hill prised. Yes, they said; led and lilile undoubt edly produced purple. They haU hiip peiieil on tin- aiiie niseov .'ry iu earll.r ye.irs; Inn alas! they hail folgot:eu It. After HLinlyljiK tin" hivtre indoor lor years ami years one forget almost ever) tiling t l.se. I am sending you some of the purple py express. I:oli't you agree that it would be. u Btro'iig ton ii; color lor it luiulsi ape'.' Vou will note that it Is the exact tint of Hubert Keeil s atitomohtle. It was Kee l who said to in- at the I'myers' ilub the day before 1 mlled, "When 111 doubt, my hoy, use purple." I heard to-day that Sargent uses a mason s trowel to lay color u pure, and I spike to the old masters about it; hut you can't teach nn old master new iruks. They advise inu to paint very thin at the begiti'iliig. I am receiving every cay commis sions lor oil portraits from my agents In the I'nited .States and Canada, but 1 am resolved to study another f. rt night or two belore excelling them One cannot know too much about iol or, I am convliucd. At present we are living very mod estly iu hotel quarters that cost only a thousand Irani s a week, I tit w- x- pci t to move to more comfort ib e quarters when the mom y from l.e portraits Lows iu. Vui.i's, tor Art's Sake, (..!. (JIIWoN. ! The New York I'hilharmonic Or J' chest ra is still without a permanent i oiiiluit ir Many of "the conscript ), tailors.' as Mr. Henderson calls t.iu 1 1 members id tlie band, favor Halation", '.' whose siiecialty is conduct itu without a l,:i:,ai (llhers lirefer Wciliuart Her. who (here ii h:il conducts without notes. Then is Strauss, who conducts without licit., who conducts without re , Sousa, who conducts wlih .ut a scrw thoiiKla, and James K. Ilackett, who eoiidui's without an orchestra. ho I'iiilhariuonic has not yet l'oiin-I i? con ductor who conduits without a Hilary. The Litsrfiry Market. ( l-'or the ejiiilaiu e of au:liors who aro unfamiliar wilh the needs of the vari ous periodicals. I Mc( 'lin e's, New York. Is overstot Ueil with articles on uraft, and is not ptir . hasiim at present. Mun.-ey's, New York, is in thu mar ket for aiiyt Iiiiil!. Noihln rejected i hat is d.'i li-beialil". Tlie ll.ipiisi I iiloii, ('hieat;.), docs not pay for sloliis about actresses or base.-, ball players. Town Topics, New York, requests Its 1 1 1 r res pi m 1 1 e 1 1 1 s to be a lilt!" moru careful until ftiriher notice. Tin- Woman's Home Companion, New York, wants "really funny Jokes." They must be perfectly sale and Well ni;ed. 1 he Century does not care for nr ticles on timely topics unless they a ro well written. Harper's Jlazar will pay kooiI prices for hriuht. snappy dress iatteriiH that have a stroiiK human interest and end happily. Can journalism be taught? JCxperta have dl.-wmri'cd. At the time Mr. I'u lil.'.er's Cidb'v.c of Journalism was pro posed, opinions as to its value wero sharply divergent. Journalism was held to be a mysterious culling, no more to be taught than clairvoyance or second sb'.ht. Now. literature is ns much more mysterious ami recondito than journalism as I-'reemasonry is more in sterions and recondite than, say, the I'lilon l.eaitue tub. and Its ap peal to popular interest is proportion ately ".renter, as Is attested by the col umns of notes about authors in the daily newspapers. Without venturing upon the argument, can literature ho taucht? It will bo our pleasant task, from time to time, to lay hare the mys teries of literature, and readers are assured that nothing could possibly he more Interesting. A complete exposn Is promised. We shall probably begin with the Author Chaser, one of tho most Interesting figures ia modern lit eral lire. Equal to the Occasion. Speaking of the peculiar Ineilent9 that occasionally oe ur on the stir.:e, a well-known actor said that one of tho urns! laughable happened some time ince in the theater of a thriving town up the slate. 'I he scene at that par ticular moment was tne de k of a ship, around which rolled and heaved a vast theatrical sea. The hero was sdlio-ipii.-ing on the pitching deck and tho audience was intently listening to his siell binding words, when a ruddy head protruded through a hole li tho ocean In full view of all. The hero, however, was equal to the occasion. ; (lancing at the apparently floating I head, he lustily yelled: , "Man overboard! Man overboard!" I Hardly had he spoken befor tho jhead of the sea manipulator was wltli I drawn, and, with a sad sigh that could j be heard all over thu house, the actor j pileously cried: "Too hue, loo late! Another Poor fallow has gone to his last account,"- Philadelphia Telegraph. Pi-ovisionni Name. A girl baby was brought to a Seatt'e cbvgyiiiau to be baptized. He asked the name of the baby. Iiina,',l M.," the father respondt d. "Hut what does tho M. stand for?" asked the minister. "Well, 1 don't know yet. It Appends upon how she turns out." "Why, I do not understand you," said the minister. "Uh, if she turns out nice and sweet ami handy about tho house, like her mother, I fchnll call her Dinah May. Hut if she has a fiery temper and bombshell disposition like mi no, I shall call her Dinah .Might.' San Francisco, Beautiful for Situation To Become a Second Naples Similarity of Natural Feature and Now the Sinister Similarity of Nature' Violence. In San Franrlseo grand plans were making for a City nenutlful, when de acendel sudden destruction and death. Though the scientists tell its no part of the world can be declared Immune from danger of earthquake nhockB, yet there are certain regions known as "earthquake countries' Japan, China. Indian and the western coast of South Amerlca here there have been fre quent visitations, great loss of life and California used to be spoken of as an earthquake state. It was not nntll recently her rltlzens hazarded the building of tall structures. Form erly It was n town of low dwellings, -lth little stone or brick used In their construction. A short while ago I held conversation with a man from tho Hawaiian Islands to the people of the Islands San Francisco Is the great metropolis, looms to them ninth tdgger than London or I'arls or New "York anil reference was made lev him to the marked change now noticeable In Snn Francisco, the uprearlng of modern sky scrapers, people evidently feeling safe from earthquake menace, putting up such structures as the Chronicle building, ten stories high, the Sprcckles building rising 1G stories. Commercial progress taken care of, Pan Francisco of late had been In- iCKNI I.N tensely Interested in making of tho town seemingly so happily situate, a place as beautiful as fur famed Naples, with which Italian city the California city had often been compared in re gard to natural feature each with precipitous hills and wonderful water view. San Francisco was built on n peninsula, between the waters of the beautiful bay and the Pacific ocean; the business portion on what once were sand duties, but just north and boldly, precipitously. Plans were mak ing for cutting the hills Into effective terraces and adorning the terraces with flowers, that they might resemble Naples' streets of stens. Hat more A S1UK STPKET. sinister likeness to Naples was to banish the dream of growth In beauty and wealth while the exquisite town on the Mediterranean was stricken with dread because of threatening Vesuvius, over on the other side of the world San Francisco, without warning or any preparation whatsoever, in the peace and quiet of the early morning, overwhelmed, devastated! T'?n Bplendld, gay, wonderful city, so strong tn its youth and bops, so triumphant of man's accomplishments and victories, in but thrice (10 secotvds turns i into an abode of desolation and SfeWV r:' "S horror and walling! In an Instant the flower-brlghtrned streets ruined the rose-wreathed houses becomt houses of mourning, the Joyous peopli crazed with grief! Never before In the history of thlf country had there been Inflicted such an overwhelming earthquake catas trophe any place within the country Three notable earthquakes, but In de struction of human life not to be com pared with the terrible present, had worked ruin. In 181 1-12 there oc curred a strange disturbance In th Mississippi valley, a series of shock! covering a spare of two years, and severe manifestation occurring at short Intervals for several months; at some time during the period of disturb ance, an area over CO miles In lengtr. and about 30 In breadth sank from sli to ten feet before Its former level. In 1872 in Inyo Valley, California, an earthquake destroyed ten villages and killed oneteuth of the population. The Charleston earthquake, 18S6, de stroyed property worth millions and killed 41 people. When one learns that something like 2'.0 earthquake shocks in San Fran cisco have been recorded in the last half century, one understands the In habitants have had cause to hesitate about raising piles of stones that GATK rAKtv any moment might topple and add their threatening to the terrors of an earthquake. Hut though so numer ous, earthquakes hitherto caused very little damage; apprehension retired Into the background. The city has suffered vastly more from fire than from earthquakes. The abundance of fine timber and the pop ular bdirf that frame dwelling were safi r, resulted In San Francisco be coming a city of wooden buildings, easy prey to the flames. From 1849 51 there was a series of most disas trous conflagrations, $16,000,000 worth of property destroyed and many per sons killed. In 1S!I8 occurred an earthquake said to bo most severe of any recorded in the city's history, but resulting in no loss of life. Tho last earthquake oc curred about the middle of January, 1SO0, like this dreadful one of 190(i, taking place very early In tho morn ing. There were several shocks, of such severity people were thrown from their beds, the well-known St. Nicholas hotel, the chief building af fected, was severely shaken, buildings all over the city felt the vibration. Though not a Naple3 in loveliness, Pan Francisco was very rich in charm, 'primps at first one felt disappointed, still carried If arriving by train the dust of the desert in one's mouth and inclined to criticise a certain dry and barren aspect here and there. But after a few days, a little wandering about the streets, enthusiasm grew apace. Not the enthusiasm for piles of brick and stone and all the signs of geld and money s;.ent; but for the Individual, novel, local fascination. Such fresh hand.-ome women, fairly radiating health. They did more than make a picture, they bespoke out-door living, a climate kindly yet with twang enough to stir one's blood, something ample and free and gener ous. Down In the Market street whirl of business and pleasure at every corner flower venders offered their fragrant wares, the temperate easterner could get tropical luxuriance of blossome for a mere nothing. Then there were added other enthu siasms. For (lolden Gate park now. alas, so woefully changed; become an encampment of homeless and d solate. For the trim houses and well-kept grounds of the Presidio now bearing signs of an affliction sad as ever befell wretched humanity. From the heights one may still look upon a view of rare beauty. There is still the wide ocean, the island-dotted bay, the distant mountains. San Fran cisco is still tho gateway to the orient. And the spirit which built up the splendid ci'y has not been utterly broken, even now they plan and la bor for restoration. Yes, he w feeble Is man, but bow wonderful, bow he roic! K AT11EIUNE POPlv THE FINISH FOR POOR 10. Indians Visiting the National Capital Get Into Trouble Through Writing. Mr. Francis Leupp, commissioner of Indian affairs, is seeking to discourage the visits of the red men to Washing ton, and to induce them to do their business with the government by mall. He says that their Junkets to the cap ital cost the government a deal of money and that they consume au un necessary amount of the official time. This is all well from the official stand point, but poor Lo is to be consid ered, too. He has a decided aversion to signing papers, and with good rea son. Usually, when he signs a paper, even the most innocent-looking, it turns up later ns a promlsory note or a deed to his property. Drink has done less harm to the aborigine than ink and it might in truth be said that his white brother has suffered in like ratio from the two. And the two, taken in conjunc tion, hnve well-nigh ruined both. The serpent taught Adam and Eve to write, after they had made the'r marks on a paper that gave him a:i their real estate. It is not hero insinuated that the government o fielals In Washington would Induce poor Ixj to sign bunko papers, but there are many scribes hanging about tho reservations who would take advantage of the Indian commissioner's advice to wrong the Ig norant savage by writing. If the government officials really have any regard for the Indian, they will permit him to transact his affairs by word of mouth, according to ancient use. And If any business is to be transacted by mail, let It be that of the white office seekers, who now throng the Btreets of the capital. This would enable the officers to save more time than they "waste" on the Indian delegations. TROUBLE FOR THE CLERKS. Government Employes at Times Are Subjected to Much Useless Labor. "Congress makes lots of unneces sary trouble for tho government clerks," said a veteran employe, "but the worst case I know of occurred a few years ago. A certain western sen ator asked the comptroller of the cur rency to tell him how much stock a certain man had in a national hank. He was Informed that such Informa tion was regarded as confidential and couldn't lie given out. "'We'll see about that,' said the senator, who was plainly disappoint ed and displeased. "Several days later he secured the passage of a resolution calling upon the secretary of the treasury to fur nish the senate with the names and holdings of the stockholders In all the national banks In the country. He really wanted to know only the Inter est of one man In a bank, but he knew that he couldn't get a resolution of that kind through the senate, so he included the stockholders in all the national hanks. "It took the entire force of the comptroller's office several weeks to prepare the information, and when it reached the senate nobody paid any attention to It except the author of the resolution, and he merely looked fit the mass of papers only long enough lo see about the man he was after, and then tossed the papers aside. It was an Immense lot of work for noth ing." NOT A LAME SENATOR. And Being- a Fighter the Hotel Caller Didn't Care to Inter view Him. He had been hanging around the desk of a hotel In Washington for ten minutes te t ra the clerk usked what was wanted, and mcnta.ly t-i.eti him up as an office-seeker from the Wild and woolly wjst. "Senator Hlank stops here, don't he?" "Yes, sir, ho do s. ' "Was that him that come along a few minutes sg. and t'-ok a toothpick from the holder?" "I don't think so." "Ho walked w.t!) a stiff 'nee anj didn't lo ;! at all lik. a tH-ht r." "Then it wasn't Sen i o.- 1!!: nU. He has no stiff knea and you havo ou'y to look at him t) te hat he t a lighter. Do you want t i inlerv ev him'.'" "N o, 1 guess uot not if he isn't a lame man." "What difference does that iua'.e''" "A heap, my iriend. I wanted to ask him what corporation owned him, but if he's got twi sound legs ai.d is a fighter 1 gue-s I'll let it go r.n 1 wri e him a post card." Changeable. This story wns told In t' e senate cloakrooms anronos of the speech of I Senator Patterson, supposed to be a Democrat, tn which he tulou.cii all oi President Roosevelt's nolle!- s: A lo cal census enumerator visit : the sen ator's home In Denver an 1 wus re ceived by the ne';ro buthr. After the usual questions, he asked: "What is the senator's politics?" 'TV goodness' sake, mister, I dunno; "ib senator ain't done been home since breakfast time." To Relieve the Boots. "Why are all the solas and chairs In the cloakrooms upholstered iu leath er?" asked Congressman Tyndall, the Ozark mountain member, of Champ Clark. "Dunno," answered Clark. "I suppose It's iashloilable and ifon't wear out like black hair cloth." "Oh, that's It, Is It?" Tyndall said, "omeliody told ms it itus so that wo could sharp en our Salves without lackiujj oui boots." SALUDET is the only HIGH GRADE POWDER offered to the consumer at a Moderate Prico MAKES PURE FOOD Free from Rochelle Salts, Alum oc any injurious substance. Calumet Baking Powder is recommended by leading phy sicians and chemists. Biglnterest OnYourMoney All profits pnld In dtvlilends. Other hnve made one hundred per ceuL In Koine biutlm . Sure Income fur life and vulualiio WnrY fer family. Hi-al estate deeded to Philadelphia trust rotnpnnv for protection of Inventors. Ilpnutlfullv llliistriitrd liooklet ami paper free. Write at nnce. I. I,, and I. Co . LHjjit A, Drexel llulUUiitf, rtiiludclputa, la. PATENTS Spnit for Inven tor' I'rlmer" mul I'bImi. mm r.a.lon.." K-i n h 1 mht'.l IW1. Hat itui St. .n.-Mi'i'"". n. i'. r CIJOIWIlw IftrMiiehv ul 4'nU-ttsu, 4'levlimU, IK-lrolu She Got the Wrong Garment. "Oh, it was awful awful," said the plrl with the bright brown eyes. 'At the same time it was screamingly fun ny any yet I want to shed tears of mortification every time I think about it "It happened at tho Van Atta's af fair tho other nlsht. The Van Atas are rather exclusive people, you know, and I fairly thrilled with delight when I read their invitation. The night of the affair I spent hours gett ing ready. I put on my prettiest gown of course, and prinked and preened ns I had never done before. When everything was at last complete I surveyed myself in the mirror. And if I do say It myself. I was radiant. Tho excitement of anticipation had given my clucks a glow and my eyes a sparkle that I felt would fetch the first man that saw me. "As I entered the crowded reception room In the big mansion that night I drew from my shoulders a little white silk scarf I had snatched up from a corner as I left my room, and handed it nut to the maid. I saw a young man standing nenr tho doorway look at the scarf and then at mo with a rather queer expression in his eyes. At the same time I noticed that the face of the girl he was talking to was frozen with horror. In surprise glanced nt tho scarf as the maid step ped up to take it, and Oh oh oh, what do you suppose I was holding out by the one sleeve? A gauze under vest!" New York Press. Mr. Goelet Was Honest. The late Ogden Goelet, when a dir ector in a gas company, was called upon to pass upon the making of a contract with another company. He said to his fellow directors: "Gentle men I happen to lie a director in that company and I never will consent to be a director in one company an pnss upon business with another com pany In which I am a director. I will resign first." Anil resign lie did. Customers of n shoo dealer Insist upon their rights, and they also get their lefts. FOUND OUT. A Trained Nurse Discovered Its Effect. No one Is In better position to know the value of food and drink than a trained nurse. Speaking of coffee a nurse of WTlkes Barre, ra., writes: "I used to drink: strong coffee myself and suffered great ly from headaches and indigestion. While on a visit to my brothers I had a good chance to try 1'ostum Food Coffee, for they drank It altogether In place of ordinary coffee. In two weeks, after using Postum, I found I was much benefited and finally my head aches disappeared and also the inul fesiion. "Naturally I have since used Postuttt among my patients, and have noticed a marked benefit where coffee has been left off and Postura used. "I observe a curious fact about Post urn used among mothers. It greatly helps the How of milk in cases where coffee is Inclined to dry it up, and where tea causes nervousness. "I find trouble in getting servants to make Postum properly. They most al ways serve it before It has been boiled long enough. It should be boiled 15 or 20 minutes and served with cream, when It is certainly a delicious bever age." "There's a reason" for Postum,