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BILL NYE AT THE PLAY.
He Drown Klrctloti Itriuorae by Vl Itlnu n Kowrrjr Variety Khow. It is to be racrelti'd that tlurinsr tlio past week no little attention Iiiih been pad by Hie bright nml iiblo amusement uml theatrical writers of the New 1 ork press to the bill nightly presented by tlio London Theniro of this plnce. (.'erlaiuly for thue who enjoy an even ing of uninterrupted enjovtiirnt. in a trilling expense there i.s nolhins at prosont to i'unin'(i' with thu London. Three hours of solid fun that anybody can understand, together with tlurty or forty gong nml a play, urn very ' rarely offered in this c'ty for 2' ccnls, ami it certainly seems to mc to usher in an era of prosperity and good fool ing among tlio plain peoplo who enjoy n spectacular, musical ami dramatic season at cut rales. I had feared that the London Theatre would partake so much of Kiiglisli customs ami Kuglish methods that per haps It might at lirt he startling lo ouo who is so thoroughly an American every day in the week as 1 am, but I was told that most every one connected with tho theatre was born in this conn try. I found myself readily adapting my self to tho English customs of the Lon don Tboatro, howevor, tin the enter tainment went on, and ll-iugh tho habit of marking time on the part of tho audience with tlio font seems odd at lirst, ono soon gels aoenstomed to it no that one keeps one's foet going to one's inlinile delight throughout. I did not tako a lady with mo to tho London, thinking that I would go lirst and soc how I likod it myself. I found that the rest of the audience consisted of gentlemen who evidently thought the sanio way. It was a good opportunity to study tho English audience, though of course thero wcro many American visitors there liko myself, several of whom took off their hats towards the close of the entertainment. The hcoiio opens with a can-opener and an overture, during which rapid liddling is done by three men, who gain perceptibly on each other in ahalf-milo dash, followed hy the clarionet later and the hoarse accents of tho xylophone. It is a medley, and admirable time was kept by tho audience, hid by two sailors who set near mo, dressed up In their other clothes ami a chew of tobac co apiece, which made that side of their faces sag considerably, ami give them a sinister expression of counte nance and a tinge of ill-concealed navy tobacco. When tho vast audience was perfectly still, as it frequently was after a humorous burst from tho stage, 1 fancied that I could hoar the salivary glands of these two old tars toiling on hopelossly through tho slowly moving hours. The curtain then rises and discloses a brilliant picture of Parisian life. I judge that the climate of Paris is such that pcoplo can dress themselves on a great doal loss money than they can here. But I believe that what they save thore in clothes must go for doc tors' bills and mutton tallow with which to rub thoir chests at night, for, as hardy as I am, I would not dare to go to balls and parties with nothing hut a light pair of volvet shoulder straps over in y lungs. The Parisian people seem to pndo UieuisuKo ou their lung power, but I must say that I think it fool-hardy to go aboirt on theso crisp autumn evenings with little to protect tho chest but a live-cent bunch of pansies. Aftor the Paris life episode, which is really more spectacular than anything else, the Acme (Juartet Club, consist ing of four handsome young men in full dress and police gloves, warbles a few strains, during which it attains tho higher notes with some dilliculty and swollen jugular veins. Tho Acme (juartrt pleased mo very much, espe- 0 ally when it rcfusod to sing any more. 1 think the Acme is certainly superior lo the Climax Quartet, the Tropin', the Little Mammoth or the Early Ihvarf (Jnartct. A tableau was now produced with Eden Musee effects and, with a calcium light thrown on it, pleased inn much petter than the Ha way murder. After this Messrs. Manchester and Jennings introduced some more songs, dances and commedy flashes. Just as the dust would get fairly settled on the tago some one would burst forth into a hoarse and croupy jig. Then there would be a song in which one parly is represented as strolling down broad way. When he gels about as far ns Fourteenth street ho produce a tin cornucopia bidding about a pint of and, jerks it a few times over the stage, ami throwing his head back so that the gallery can get a good view of his vocal cords, he favors tho pcoplo slong lower Brood way with a tremu lous double clog, lie then stops and mgs another verse of the song, which wrings hint down about Park place. After he has done this, he dances somi inoro and start nut L. U. K, evldentlj for the Cortlnndt Street Ferry, bill soon reappears with a different suit ol clothes and carols again with the sam light-hearted manner that a man wean when he goes over lo the depot t( meet his niodiiral son who is just re turning penniless, but penitent, from the pest-house. Ten minutes are next devoted tc selections from French opera bj Delnuraud Debimont, who also chang their clothes several times, after whlct nine lovely women are discovered standing on the slago dressed in moii'i clothes. Nino lovely women look bettor in their own clothes, I think, and tho further into them they can get, In cold weather, the better. These nine lovely women sing song which sounds liko all tho othei songs that have been sung, involving more or less strolling down Broadwav and breaking up several home circles, sly and unconstitutional social eccen tricity, A:e., during which one of the nine lovely women, wearing a baseball uniform in which she looks liko a Hauncl doll that has been run over by a heavy wagon, distinctly and in n poiiilbliiuk manner winks towards me, and 1 put my hat on again to cover my confusion. At this point a young u'oinati singt another song. At least it is generally understood that it i.s another song, but it sounds similar, (hough any one can see hy her gestures that it has more pathos in it, and instead of strolling down Broadway she wanders by the brooks ide and a large chunk of sadness falls ou her; whereupon she clutches at her heart liko an infuriated man trying to strangle a basket of pups. Mr. Harry Morris, accompanied by a woven wire stomach upon which he falls with I lie ul most impunity, holds a short but uglily humorous consultation with the orchestra. lie stays on tho stago eight minutes, after which lie succeeds Id eluding tho vigilance of the audience and getting away. .J it I o mi, the handsomest aerial artist in tho world, I hen smiles at a mark on the coiling, bows ami puts her fingers to her lips like a man who is replacing his front teeth according to Marquis of (jueensberry rules, and ascends the trapeze by means of a dark-rod siring, luleau then proceeds lo hang by one limb, by two limbs, by her chin, by her elbow, by her nose and by her eyebrow. while the baud plays a quivering selection. She does not say anything during all the time sho i.s before the audience, but seoins to rely solely on her gestures. She is dressed plainly in a close-filling costume, which show." her trim ligure lo good advanlago, hut does not in any way interfere with tho free use of her limbs. Her sontimonts wcro highly indorsed by ono and all. Sho is assisted by Mr. (ieorgo W. Brown, of Spain, who wears a 'plain suit of lights and an air of npprohon- sion. Tho entertainment closes wilh a comical burlesque with jokes in it. The villain is very funny indeed. This is entirely new. A humorous villain has never lieen successfully attempted bo- fore. His name is William Pastorina and at one time be trios to stab a poor young girt who begs him for God's sake to spare her life the remainder of her days and she will sit up nights to bless him. Sho states that sho is utterly alone, oh. so very niiiuli so, and Ihut sho has no protector, not even being protected by copyright, aud so ho does not take her life. He is a pleasant villain, with a sinister smile and s tumor on the side of his head which looks some like an alibi. Phis play is quite long and, as the tobacco smoke in the dress circle had thickened up a good deal aud interfered with the view, I went out and took a stroll In the crisp November starlight, forgetting to go back till it was too late. I noticed in tho audience quite a numljcr of those who always attend the lirst nights at the Bowery theatres. Mr. Sunnivsn Guunivan was present and sat pretty well dewn towards the front. He said lie liked the play Hi st rate and hoped it would succocd. Mr. Ah There, Mr. Wun Lung a'nd Mr. Sing Lo, who snt pretty well back on the off side of the upper balcony, thought that the American play was too brief. They claim that too much had to le cut out m order to play ono of our dramas at a one-night stand. Mr. 'Kastits clay and bis son, Mr. Hansomedlhrong Clay, of Washington, I). C, who are visiting our town, said that they thought tha villain's tnmor was a great bit- Mr. Ransomodthroug Clay says that he Is very glad inJeed to note the revival of tha dramatic tumor in our midst. Mr. Billy Mcti lad, of the Theatre Comique of Dubuque, sat near the or chestra. He thinks that the time for tautening on stage whiskers with tele graph wire is past Ha hopes to see tnore realism also In tha stage halo head. He thought there were tot many songs in this bill and not enongl vocal music. Altogether 1 liked this Bowery shots bolter than tho kind wo used to have on the frontier tho Alhambra,of Choycnnt for instance. Nobody wns shol during the evening and no tobacco quids were pasted on the d. eolleto head of tho boss orchestra liddler. mil A, in A'' York World. Trouble With the Hands. Young peoplo have a gront doal of trouble with their hands, and commit a groat many faults with thorn. When they go upon the platform to speak a pieco, they know not what to do with those troublesome and superfluous ap pendages, unloss some good teacher of elocution has told them; and even then it is hard to obey his injunction to "lot tlictn alone." Just to let them hang quietly and naturally by the side most of the linio, Is very ditlicult for a tyro. A boy's impulse is to got hold of his coat, fum ble wilh his watch chain, or make ees lures which add no force to his words. An old teacher of elocution has given tli's excellent rule: "When your hands have nothing to do, do nothing -with them; let them bang. Some boys, yes, and some girls, too, have a world of trouble In keeping their hands clean. Probably, on this very day, in tho United States, one hundred Ihousand mothers have spok en words like these, In various tonos, "Johnny, what dreadful hands tocomo to tho table with! (io and wash them, sir, al once!" Johnny gazes ruefully at what his eldest sister calls his "horrid paws," and wonders how they could havo ac quired their dismal huo. It is a mys tery. He started clean in the morn ing; at least, ho thought he did, and ho has only been to school. Yet look at iiis hands ! Black as a charcoal deal er's with nails fearful to behold. Many boys wonder, naturally enough, how grown peoplo keep their hands clean nil day without taking much trouble about it Boys handle everything, whether clean or dirty, and half of them do rot know how to wash thoir hands, or how to wipe Ihoiu dry. Hands well washed and perfectly dried will keep clean four limes as long as hands half washod and half dried. Nails, too, are much more easily kept in good order if they are attended to frequently and with caro and thoroughness. Many, indeed, are the faults of the hands. One of the worst is pointing the finger of scorn at tho faults of others. Biting tho thumb was the Italian mothod of expressing contempt In the days of Romeo and Juliet, the 'tragedy of whose lives began with their servants biling their thumbs at one another. It is with the hands that boys pinch, scratch and steal. Ham let called his hands "pickers and steal ers." But, thou, what beautiful and won derful things the human hand can do! What lovoly pictures it can paint; what enchanting music it can play; what valiant deeds it can do; what kind acts it can perform! Best of all. it can lift up the fallen and welcome back to hope and new ef fort the repentant wnndorer from the path of rectitude. ' Knowing tcaoliiii's often jjdge of the quality of thoir pupils by looking at the'r mouths. But the hands, too, have a talo to telL and sometimes they tell it very plainly. A Parrot That Praya A family living on Reed street, above Fourth, are the owners of a pretty poll parrot that has already conclusively hown the evidence of early religious training. Tho bird Is an unusually bright one, and it salutes the'members of the family every morning with a regularity that is as interesting as it is remarkable. St. Alphonsus's German Catholio Church on the southwest corner of Fourth and Reed streets, is provided with a aet of chimes which, besides ringing on every Sunday and holy day, ring out the "Angolus" every evening. This is for the purpose of reminding pious Catholics who live within the sound of the bells of n little prayer that is to be recited at that time of the day. Recently one of the little girls of the bouse began to call the attention of the parrot to the ring ing of the chimes. The bird was a careful observer, and attentively watched the little one recite the prayer. Suddenly, one evening, as the bell rang out, the parrot jumped from his porch ti- the bottom of its cage, and assuming a reverent position, bowed its head and mumbled the first few words of the prayer. Since that time, it is claimed,-the parrot is as regular - and attentive to its daily prayer? as any member of the family Philadelphia Inquirer, NOLAND & CO., THe use op H A R D W ARE, r v. STOVES ,'ya m&frM ffl si, "ry .- ' Texas Storage Company, Trus'ing you may favor our city with a visit during tlio Fair, we take (his method of extending to you a most cordial Invitation to cull on us. Our town oltiee I ut H2I Main Htreet, our warehouse on the Texns & l'nellio switch, nt tlio junction ol the Texas Trunk Hallway, in Hast Dallas, ami will lava an exhibit ut Hie Kulr (round where we will show you a lew samples of the goods we handle in lids Stale, unions which we will mention : THE AULTMAN & TAYIOE SEPARATOR, THE AULTMAN & TAYLOR HORSE POWER. THE AULTMAN & TAYLOR STANDARD ENGINE. THE AULTMAN & TAYLOR TRACTION ENGINE. THE EMPIRE MOWER. THE EMPIRE STEEL FRAME HARVESTER AND BINDER. THE JOHN DODDS HORSE HAY RAKE. HAND PUMPS, STEAM PUMPS, WIND MILLS. 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