New-York tribune. [volume], January 04, 1920, Page 5, Image 71

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The "Mother Instinct" Does Not
Die With the Possession
Of ?an Income
v. ? *
By Hannah Mitchell
SOME DAY a feminine "Daddy
Long-Legs" may take her
place among character parts,
or a snappy comedy on
??Mammies" may be heralded from
tB6 boards. Anyway, women for the
pgrts of foster-mothers are much
needed in real life at present, ac?
cording to the placement board of
the New York State Charities As?
sociation, and, moreover, are coming
forward to fill the parts.
The large number of business and
professional women with man-size
salaries has been a subject of com?
ment ?and even of boast by the or?
ganizers of the Federation of Busi?
ne? and Professional Women's
Ctaba There are possibly ten thou
' sand business women in New York
whose weakly incomes are ?$50 and
more. Indeed, more than half of
the somber exceed $50 a week.
The accusation has been made
that the siren lure of the sal?
ary has drowned the still, small
voice of motherhood. The women
in question are for the most part
oblivious to the condemnation east
at them; oblivious, because their
consciences are clear. They have
done the work that their hands
found to do and only they them?
selves know to what accompanying
pangs of forfeited motherhood.
The Potential Mothers
Many of the business women
themselves are helping to adjust
.he seeming unevenness of condi?
tions. Potential motherhood has
^wakened and is claiming its part
in ?the scheme of things. Star wom?
en in the commercial field have dem?
onstrated their interest in children.
Some of them have legally adopted
sons and daughters; others have
contributed to the education and
support of children in need of help.
In the course of her campaign for
city magistrate last fall the public
learned that Miss Bertha Rembaugh
had an adopted daughter. Miss Rem
baugh's friends had, of course, been
acquainted with the young lady for
some time. She is Julia Rembaugh,
che legally adopted daughter of the
woman lawyer. No one is prouder
of the relationship, merely legal
though it be, than Julia herself.
Julia Rembaugh is now fifteen
yean old. Several years ago Miss
Bertha Rembaugh, innately a person
with s sense of responsibility to hu
?anity, took Julia to live ?with her.
it h understood that In the begin?
ning it was Miss Rembeugh's idea
r?aply to guide Julia's education
tad ?pply her with the home life
-&4 influen?a which are no small
P?t of any education. Miss Rem
**agb had worked her own way
flooogh college and has a well de
tod conception of the hard places
k the road of any young woman
?to aught attempt the aame course.
&? would seem just the person to
***? the rough placea plain and
*? crooked paths atraight.
"H* l*gal Adoption
So Julia went to live with Miss
Swabsugh. The two became so at
**ched that after a year of tenta
^ w?e mother- and daughter-hood a
?*?! adoption was decided upon.
J*ha took Miss Rembaugh's name
^became her legal heir.
"I believe that every man and
?ornan is interested in the youngei
**???<*," said Miss Rembaugi
**w*tk. "Marriage does not havi
TlT**1* *n lntemt in children
! *??? always been interested ir
7<*H people and their welfare anc
?Wortuoitje,?
*?K? Bembaugh, by the way, ii
**W the advantage of one of th<
** Wvate school* in the city, anc
???Ubtedly will be fitted for what
?fctfce*r<*r ?h? chooses and foi
?n,** *boW8 ?o*-?#????
*jj3* '?other? who adopt? hei
^?n runs nojnore risk than th<
P__?!r Wh? bwMtl her8>" Miw Rcm
J"k* ??rtiatied. "If it were simplj
a***?* of knowing somethinj
r** ?*?'? children beforehand th.
Smother m,,y ima the *dvafl
?g'"***' faany parents know wba
I offspring? What child may not in?
herit the homicidal tendencies or
other bad qualities of some distant
grandparent? The physical charac?
teristics and the mental and spirit?
ual inheritance of a foster child can
be gauged pretty well in the period
of probation."
Probation for Parents
This matter of probation for the
parents as well as for the children
is insisted upon by the New York
State Charities Association. Manj
parents apply for children to adopt
who are wholly unfit for the respon
sibility, according to Miss Sophi.
Theis, of the Charities Association
The association takes the responsi
bility of finding out all about tin
families or would-be guardians tha
ask to be permitted to take in chil
dren.
"Healthy children are always 1
demand," said Miss Theis. "I
j fact, we seldom have enough to g
around. Of course, there are man
sick and deficient children that com
to our attention that no one woul
take. Many of these children coul
be salvaged if we could only arous
an interest in them." \
Of the more than three thousar
children for whom the Charitii
Association has found homes in the
last few years, twenty-five have been
taken by unmarried business women.
"There are types of children who
need just the sort of background
and atmosphere that these business
women can give them," continued
Miss'Theis. "We have found that
so-called "difficult' children do not
fit into the ordinary home. Many
of the families which adopt girls
want the old-fashioned storybook
daughter; some one who likes to fit
into the home and do the little tedi?
ous, nice things. Now, some chil
I ___?_____? I ? I I
IT WAS raining, and the wind
was blowing hard. The squall
beat against the ruined walls of
the church and leaves fell in heaps
on the graves below. The cemeteries
of the Ourcq have a sadder air than
the cemeteries of the Aisne. Xhey
are four years old.
I am speaking of a cemetery which
Is near a still unreconstructed
church. There are monuments there,
chiseled tombstones, crowns and in?
scriptions, most of which prove how
difficult it is to express appropriately
the sense of grief. There are some
graves without markings or decora
; tions. The fields near by the ceme?
tery are cultivated. The hamlet is
full of life. The peasants pursue
their toll. They have rebuilt their
homes, but they haven't rebuilt the
church. Perhaps they don't want to
forget !
"Madame! mademoiselle! Get up;
try to pull yourself together." She
was stretched out across a pathway,
! her head against a plot railing. The
j rain fell in torrents on the poor crea
' ture?the poor black thing.
It is a digressing spectacle?a
\ woman fainting in a cemetery.
I took her in my arms and carried
i her to shelter within the church.
I The wind tossed her wrap over her
j head. The rain blinded mc. I didn't
; see her face.
"Madame! mademoiselle!"
"What is it?"
"You lost conseiousnes?. I picked
? you up."
She opened her eyes. Later I saw
| that she was very homely, execs
Miss Bertha Rembaugh,
whose adoption of a daugh?
ter became known as an
incident of the last mu?id
> pal campaign
I dren like to do things about the
home. That is, they are of the
type nearly every family wants as
a daughter. On the other % hand,
some of the little girls we get with
the best minds are not at all the
traditional- daughter type. It is
difficult to find homes for them.
"It seems to me that they would
make ideal wards for business and
professional women. I have in mind
a little girl whom I shall call Kath?
arine, although that is not her name.
This is her photograph," and Miss
Theis took out of her desk a pic?
ture of a dreamy-eyed, sensitive
faced child of about thirteen years.
"Katharine comes from a good
The children shown here
have all been adopted by
bachelor business women of
Neic York
family," she said. "We can vouch
for as clean an ancestry for her as
many of us have. She has a little
brother, and both children were to
have been adopted together. The
two went to 'visit' the family, as
most of our children do before legal
adoption takes place. The boy fit?
ted into the family circle perfectly
and was adopted, but Katharine was
a great disappointment as a daugh?
ter. She could not sit on a cushion
and sew a fine seam with equanim?
ity. Instead of doing the little,
daughterly things about the home
that were expected of her, Kath?
arine wanted to be out on her bicycle.
Instead of having her hair curled
and being dressed in lacy white love?
liness, Katharine cared little
whether her hair was combed more
Miss Christabel Pankhurst, English suffragist, who has
adopted a little girl
than once a day or not, and her fa?
vorite dress was bloomers.
"Katharine did not fit into the
picture of that family. Consequent?
ly she has not been adopted. But
she would make an ideal 'daughter'
for some business woman who would
not require that she spend all her
time on the domestic arts, and to
whom she could look for inspiration
in her career. I feel sure that,
adopted or not, Katharine will have
a career."
Adopt Boys, Too
Business women's choice of chil?
dren does not show a predominance
of either sex. They average up very
much like most normal mothers.
Some like girls and some like boys.
Translated by William L. McPherson
(Copyright, 1920, New York Tribune Inc.)
Here is a war story with a certain grim flavor in its pathos. Its author, who writes with distinction, is a Swiss citizen who fought as a volun?
teer in the French armies. /
lively thin, her cheekbones stand?
ing out, her forehead bulging. She
had an unhealthy appearance, a yel?
low complexion and hair without a
suggestion of poesy. But at that
moment there was a certain poesy in
iier expression.
"I beg your pardon, monsieur. My
mind is a blank. Where am I? Ah! '
It's the church in the cemetery. My j
poor lost ones!"
She was very young?not more
than twenty. I thought: "She is
already a widow." Again she said:
"My poor lost ones!"
"Your brothers?"
"No, my fiance and the others."
I had carried her into what re?
mained of the sacristy. I rolled up
my coat to make her a pillow.
"Tell mo what happened to you."
"I want to go home."
That wasn't poHsible. She was too
sveak.
"Wait until the shower is over."
"Who are you7"
"A soldier, an officer. I came to
pray at the grave of one of my men."
"What was his name?"
I told her the na|?e. She an?
swered ;
"I didn't know him. I was pray
ing at the grave of the four chas?
seurs?at the big grave, you know."
"I do. There is a single stone with
four names on it."
"They were buried together, just
as they lived together. One of them
was my fianc?, and the other three
were engaged to my three girl
friends. We had known one another
since childhood. We were from the
same village. We were to be mar?
ried the same year. Then the war
came. H?l?ne, Ren?e, Marie and I
accompanied them to the station.
Two months afterward all were dead,
and all four of us were left widows
before we had even married.
"We set out from our village to
recover their bodies. We searched
this part of the country until we
found them. We paid for the monu?
ment. Their relatives remained
down there, in the Jura. Wo couldn't
return. It was too far away from
them. The other girls loved them
then as I love them still. I have
nothing against my three compan?
ions. They, too?the dead?have
nothing against them. They under?
stand.
"At first we remained together.
We worked for a living in Paris.
H?l?ne was a saleswoman, Ren?e a
lady's maid. Marie, who had a little
money, learned to write on a type-,
writer. I made hats. We came here
every week. We brought flowers.
We wept. We were f.oyal. But' the
springtime changed things. H?l?ne
is pretty. Ren?e is a beauty. Marie
is a striking blonde. They have for?
gotten. Not all at once. Each
month they accompanied me at least
once, but I saw that they did it
grudgingly. They were accomplish?
ing a duty. They no longer came
because they couldn't stay away.
Afterward they came because they
were ashamed not to come. I kept
saying: 'You can't desert them.'
"But one day H?l?ne answered:
'Oh, you bore me.' It was in May
and the lilacs were in bloom. I told
Ren?e and Marie. They took my side
and all that summer we three came,
making excuses to Jacques, whom
H?l?ne had abandoned. The next
winter Ren?e suffered greatly from
the cold. She told me: 'I can't go
with you any longer.* Neither Marie
nor I blamed her; but we asked
Pierre to pardon her.
"The Qothas and the Zeppelins
bombarded Paris. Marie is timid.
_I
She went home to the Jura and
found another fianc? ; so I had to ask
Fran?ois to forgive her. Perhaps
they envied Pierre, to whom I shall
never be false. You understand. I
am homely. He loved m? in spite of
that, and he was the handsomest bf
them all. Our four friends! They
went away singing. I am going to
rejoin them. But life is long.
"You found me in the pathway. I
thought I should never wake up. For
an hour I had talked to them.
I called to them: 'Where are
you?' I am not much of a believer
and I haven't even this consolation:
I don't know where they are. I live
alone. H?l?ne and Ren?e don't want
to know me any'longer. To them I
would be like a figure of Remorse.
Marie doesn't write to me and my
family say that I am a fool to stay
on here in Paris, where I can't make
a living. That is true. I don't eat
every day. And this week I couldn't
hring them any flowers."
She hid her face with her arm.
Her sleeve was almost worn through
at the elbow.
Ah ! CemeUiriea of our great bat?
tles, what a setting you furnish for
dramas more human than any the
? -'
Orphans of School Age Usually;
Selected Because Easier
To Care For
In spite of the tendency to favor
little feminist daughters, a great
many business women have adopted
sons. These women make splendid,
companionable mothers for boys.
The business of adoption is so per?
sonal that, except in such cases as
that of Miss Rembaugh, when the
unmerciful hand of politics turns
the searchlight into all the home cor?
ners, the public knows very little of
whether children are adopted from
outside or within the family. The
women who adopt children are loath
to tell whether they have taken the
care of little nephews and nieces or
children from charitable institutions.
One of New York's best woman
architects has adopted a son. It is
conceded by many women of the
business world that the adoption of
children under school age is almost
impossible. In the case of this ar?
chitect that is not true. She has
adopted a boy of five years. She
keeps a housekeeper for her apart?
ment, anyway, and the "son" is in
the care of the housekeeper all day
long.
The business cares and the de?
mands which a career makes upon a
woman's strength would limit modern
working women in their adoption of
children much more than they do if
housekeeping and homemaking had
not been so simplified in the last few
years by the modern apartment.
Little apartment homes are the
havens of many business women. To
share that home with a child of
school age is only another way of
making the home complete.
The movement on the part of
bachelor men and women to adopt
children has been growing for some
time in England. It received im?
petus during the war because of the
needs of war orphans and because
the country had begun to value its
children. The great loss of life in
Europe made children more valu?
able.
Mrs. Emmeline Pankhurst, who
was in New York last week, ex?
pressed herself as very much in
favor of the adoption of children
by bachelor mothers and fathers.
Her daughter, Christabel, has adopt?
ed a daughter. According to Mrs.
Pankhurst, Miss Pankhurst takes
this adopted daughter with her
wherever she goes. The little lady is,
of course, a suffragist.
"Men as well as women have
taken a great interest in adopting
children in England," said Mrs.
Pankhurst; "they can take as much
care of their wards as fathers ordi?
narily do, and can have the super?
vision of their education and the
pleasure of taking them on vaca?
tions.
"But business women ought to
adopt children where they are able.
It has been one of the handicaps to
women's careers that they were
compelled to sacrifice home life. All
women need a normal home life, and
with the adoption of a child or sev?
eral children the business woman of
to-day may have a real home. At
the same time she does a great good
poets have ever invented! "The dead
go quickly," said Lafargue. Poor
dead and poor shriveled flowers!
There is so much springtime in the
life of a young girl !
"And your comrade, monsieur, did
you love him well?"
The rain had ceased, swept away
by the gale. I told her the story of
my little soldier. The poor girl told
me the story of the four little chas?
seurs.
"I shall never abandon them," I
said to her.
"Thank you," she cried. "We
women?one can never tell. You
men are better than we are."
Then she got to her feet. She is
really homely. I went with her to
the station. I accompanied her to
Paris. I took her address. But
when I went to see her I didn't find
her. She was at the hospital. Af?
terward I visited her there.
"Well, you have been sick?"
?I hope"
And her glance seemed to travel
toward the distant cemetery.
Then she fumbled under her pillow
and drew out a humble purse.
"It's all that I have left, and it's
for them."
That is why four chasseurs, rest?
ing in a single grave, receive a visit
from me as often as I can make one
?in a cemetery in the suburbs of
Paris, where the heroes of the first
Marne sleep.
to society by helping to right some
of its injustices.
"I have known many business and
professional women in England who
adopted children. They have been
happy and the children couldn't have
had better mothers. There is reci?
procity in the arrangement also, be?
cause while, of course, the children
were benefited, the 'mothers' profit?
ed by their happier home conditions
and the results showed in their
work."
The ''daughter" adopted by Chrfs
tabel Pankhurst was one of four lit?
tle girls taken by Mrs. Pankhurst
herself several years ago. They were
babies, all very nearly the same age
when taken. Their photograph!.,
which Mrs. Pankhurst carries with
her wherever she goes, show them
now?-four and five years old?to be
all different types and disposition.
Mary, a rollicking, round-faced per?
son, was, according to Mrs. Pank?
hurst, a sick baby when adopted.
"She looked like a weasened little
old woman," said Mrs. Pankhurt.1,
"but with the proper feeding and
loving even a sick child can b?>
brought to health and normality. If
there is no congenital disease or
weakness the sick babies may be
| adopted and brought up with great
success."
Joan, another of the Pankhurst
"daughters," has light, fluffy hair,
and will, no doubt, some day be a
beauty. The little flock has a great
time and has become a distinct part
j of the family.
For some time Mrs. Pankhurst has
been working with the National
Child Adoption Association in Eng?
land. She says that she believes the
work of the organization in getting
homes for children will be a prac?
tical force against Bolshevism. It
will help to even the injustices that
breed discontent, she says.
Some talk has been started of an
Anglo-American exchange of or?
phans. The English Child Adoption
Association started during the war
without an overhead, except a few
"borrowed" offices, has grown and
now has a home where children can
be taken care of temporarily. The
address of the organization is IP
Sloane Street, London, S. W. I.
A number of business women in
New York have adopted children in
the way that these "fathers" in
England have. They pay for the
child's education and board and keep.
They supervise its training. When
it is possible they share their own
holidays and vacations with the
children. Sometimes they adopt
these children and make them their
heirs, but in many cases they do not.
The reciprocity of companionship
and good times works to the mother's
advantage as well as to the child's.
Keeps Son in School
The other day I met Merle, th?
"son" in such an arrangement. He i*
a tow-headed lad of about ten years.
His "mother" is a business woman
with only an ordinary salary. Sh<
cannot afford to take an apartment
and keep a home for the boy. But
she pays a certain amount toward his
education and keeps him in a board?
ing home, while she herself lives in
a furnished room. Christmas week
she took Merle out to a place in the
?country, a trip for which she had
been saving for many weeks. Merle
is bashful and does not like to comb
his hair, but he loves his mother and
has wonderful times with her. Some
day, when she is making more money,
she probably will legally adopt
Merle and they will have a quiet lit?
tle home in some big apartmenl,
house.
The Charities Association has on
record a number of bachelors who
have adopted children or are spon?
soring their educations. Men, when
seeking children to adopt, almost in?
variably want boys. They usually
keep their foster sons in boarding
homes and look out for their physi?
cal welfare and their educational
needs.
Several months ago a judge who
has to do with the legal side of find?
ing homes and taking care of waifs
threw a bomb into camp by saying
that he would like to place some of
the unfortunate children who came
to his attention with women who
are earning big salaries and who
seem to contribute little to the good
of humanity. To say the least,
wherever the gentleman was quoted
to business women his opinion got a
rise out of those present, and usually
a very heated rise at that. The
question is one that business women
will take care of themselves. Those
who are able to take care of children
have felt the call to do their part in
the upbringing of the next genera?
tion and are segking the unwanted
children of irresponsible or unfortu?
nate parents._