Hp-Tis -n J, L. L.."lll., THE SUN. SUNDAY. APKIJj. j ltt.v ' , '" " V ' ,
H THE REAL THING.
H;i Bt HENBY JAKES 4 .
n .. i.
Hj When the porter wlfolshe used to answer
KC Hi hcut bell) annpuneed, "A gentleman
Hl with a lady. ItV'.I hail. a 1 often had In tho
Lt day, for the wish wa father to the thought
mti aft.lmmodlaU vision of titters. Bitters ray
pKlv vUltorsln thlVeAst roved to 1; but not In
Ko the one I should-havo preferred. t However.
H there was uothlng'at llftt to IndleaU that they
k might not have como for1 a portrait. The can
Hf tleman. ft man of fiftr. venr high and verr
ttralght. with a mouttnohe slightly grizzled
K$ arid a dark gray walking coat adratrablr fitted.
H both of which I noted ptOfesslonalW-I don't
E moan either ns a harbor or a tailor would
B;! havo struck me as' a celebrity It celebrities '
K often were striking. It was a truth of which I
BE harf for some tlmo been conscious that a figure
Rl, with a good deal of frontage was. as one blight
B ' ear. almost nevor a publlo Institution. 'A
mt'-i glance at the lady helped to remind roe of
' this paradoxical law; she also looked too die-
Kg tingulshed to bo a.".pejpnaHtV." Moreover
Ws one would scareoIVcome ftrois" two variations
KT-y jNolthor of tho pair anoks Immedlately-they
HKf only proldnged the preltmlnarr gaze whl6h
Kfe auggoeted that each wished to give the
II::- ottor a chance. They were visibly shy: they
IF stood there letting me take them In-whloh. as
1 IattBrward perceived, was the most practical
? thing they could havo done. In this way their
1 embarrassment served their cause. ,1 hid
L aeen. people palnfutly reluctant to mention
ft thattlnjy desired anything ao gross as to be
Eft represented on canvas ; but the soauples of my
BS nejv trlopds appeared almost insurmountable.
j?, Yot the goutloman might have said. V I should
K( like a portrait of ray wife." and the lady might
Rr have said. " I should llko a portrait of my hus-
jR!. band." Perhaps thoy were not husband and
V wife. This naturally would mate the matter
ft more delicate Perhaps thoy wished to be
trfr dono together. In which oaso they ought to
' have brought a third porson to break the
fT BoV. ,
ip '.'.Wo como from Mr, Btvet" the lady said at
f' last with a dim smile-, whloh had the Effect of
-' a moist sponge p-issdd ovor a " sunk" pleoo'of
ft painting, as woll as of a vague allusion to van-
jV ishod beauty. Sho was as tall and straight, in
fc her,' degree, as her companion, and with ten
t years loss to carry. She looked as sad as a
jjs"'' woman could look whose faco was not oharged
,;( nflth expression: that is. her. tinted oval mask
yjfe showed f rlotlon. as an exposed surfaoe shows
It , Tho hand of time had played over her
5. ,'ro'oln but only toslmpltty. She was slim and
J itlff, and ao. well dressod. In dark blue cloth.
";' jvlih lappets and pockets and buttons, that It
tf as cloar she employed tho same tailor as her
:Zj iiusband., Tho couple had an indefinable air
jf prosperous thrift they evidently got good
jf deal of luxury for their money. If Iwaatobe
l," one of tholr luxurlos it would behoove me to
ff, jonttdor my terms.
I "Ah. Claude Blvot recommended mef" I
inqulrod; andladded tlut It was very kind ot
ilm. though I could reflect that as he only
'Palntod. landscape, thta was not a sacrifice.
Tho lady looked very hard at the gentleman.
nd the gentleman looked round the room.
Xben staring at the floor a -.moment and strok
.ng his moustache, he reteaBU pleasant eyes
on mo with the remark: " Ha said you were
the right one." ' '
" " I try to bo. when people want to sit"
. ' "Yes. we should like to." said the .'lady,
-'"Do you mean together?" ,
t My visitors exchanged a glance. "It you
could do anything with me. I suppose It would
bo double." the gentleman stammered.
"Oh. yes. you naturally make a higher
charge fortwo figures than for one." ' , "
n,We should like to make it pay." the hus
ig, (That's very good of .you." I returned.' (ap
j""""pte,clatlng so unwonted a'sympathy.-rfor, I
j.'l supposed he meant pay the artist .
;, A"sonsoot strangeness, seemed to dawn on
)f tho lady. "Wemeanforlhelllustratlona-Mr.
fc niv'ot said you mlchtpiit-9tie4o."
li-t jTut ono In-an Illustration?" I wasequally
Kgr eopfused. . ' ' ,
&. ",8kdtuli her off. you know," said the gentle-
Jv vain, coIoHnc- ' - '
'Jli w k only tho that I understood he sor-
vlO''CIitUiuQIvut h'ni rendered me: he had
f told them that Iw'.ukort til black and white, tor
gtf mgr.l6;w..for story books, for sketch'esb'f
rJ ooinuiporry life, and oonsoquentlytiadfre
Vq aupnt ornplnyraent for models. ThesoTthtngs
" wer tnif. but It wh not less truo that (I niay
I confess. It now whotlior because thoasplra
tlph was to load to uvuryt,hlng or to nothing
IlljavQ tlioremlor to guess) I couldn't gctthe
hoj&rs, 1 1 say nothing ot the emolument, bfa
grtsit paintnr nf portmlts out of my head- Mr
"ifliistriitlnnn" word ray pot botlors; Hooked
toh dliTiimnthraneh of. urt(far and aw.iythe
nifct lntLretinii1t hid olwTys seomod''to nj)
tPprp"tttittMU)-fain. There wat nd.sliamb
tn;'.)n)lciiis tn It nlir to make my fortune:
hiU tlmt. .fortune, was .by so much .further
. nn bt'-lnc mado, fronu the moment my
riiltois wlrt!)tf4..t t, bo., "done" for hoth
'Jkii. I ,w.n lUiit'tnt.xi: for. in th
iilttrl'il sfiiKo. I h n Uirjudlately sen them.
I had e)ril tlmir type I had already settled
fj'it 1 w'mld do wlt'i It. Homothlng that
v'Milda't iibsolutfly lmv. pleased them. I
"ifUnv.ird rofloctod. Dut that's nothing; a
portrait Is alniont alwny bad tn direct proper-d'mii-tltK'aHn.'H
th originator his friends.
He'iilniAKlf onn plnaxtiliU friends; tbetrlulnph
JttlfMt pa'titi'i' 1 1 to nlutsjhlsoaemlef: they
i;y "an'tuulnvirt'iac At any rato. the delight of
;& h(.lltrlB In norttl n bad note. '
''i'Ah. yiuVo-.u're-ii V" I began, as, soon
i'v aVI ,lu'l inHtorod mysurprlA4. I oouldn't
f bring .M.ttha dingy wrd "models:" It seamed
if nJlttii.MMH-si little.
iii -."rt'o li.iwnt huJ much praetloe." said the
1 "Vyvo t to do something, and we'Ve
fl thinislit tliut'itn urt.nt, In your line, might per
;f )i tp-i ina'di K'metlilni; of u." hor husband
tliiyw r. U furtlnii' montlonoi that thoy
P' ill In t kit ir many nitlsU. nn.l thatthty had
u'iiw llr-t, hi ttio off xlinncu Ihe painted' vlowa.
W oftwmra ; but s. n 'tl nes put In figure per
A liat'-i,I rmeni ovrtl. t Mr. Blwt whom ther
fl' ' lia'l mi', a fivv;- irn b o.e at a place in Nor
&&, lojk w luro h was ikuto ilng.
itk' ''Wo lined 1 1 ketuh a little ourselves." the
fti lady rot-allcd.
I"U'h vii.-y awkward, but we absolutely must
do somatliing." hor hniband went on.
rOf ooitrso. wo'ro nut so very young." she
dmltted.' with it wun sralie.
"itli tho.romark Hint 1 might s well know
iomothlng more about them, the husband had
handed me a card, extracted from neat now
Cckotbook (their appurtenantes were all of
the freshest), and inscribed with the words.
"Major Monarch." Impressive as these words
Wre they didn't carry my knowledge much
farther: but my. visitor presently added:
".Tve left the army, and we've bad the mis
fortune 'to lose our money. In fact our means
' are extremely small."
"If at awful bore," said Mrs. Monarch.
They evidently wished to be dlsereet-to take
'are not to swagger boeause tli'T were gentle.
Sotks. I perceived they wu'd have teen
wflllng to rocognite this as mmothlng of a
drawback, at tho same time that I guessod at
, jrerslty-tlistthoy had their poiuts. They cer
tainly had; but those ndvautigos struck me as
tfSPQnderontlr social: such, for lastanoa.as
would help to tnak a drawing room look well.
However, a drawing room wus always, or
Might to be, a picture.
la couequunce of his wife's allusion to their
M' Vafor Mimoreli remarked: "Naturally,
!, tr more for' the figure that we thought ot
, going In. V7a can still hold ourselvos up." On
, thelasbint;r4aW,'.tlit th flgure was indeed'
their strong point His "naturally" didn't
aand vaU, but it llgbUd up the question.
' " She haa'got tba beet" he eontinued. nodding
ihla wile, wth. yUaaut attar .dinner H-.
senee of elrcumlocntlon. Il could only rrply,
aalf'we were' In (act sitting ovor 'our wine,
that thlstdldn'ti prevent' hs, own from being
rerygood: which led 'him to rejoin: "We
(bought that Ityou'evor havb to do people like
us, We might be something llko it Hlie. par-tlcularly-for
a lady In a book, you know."
H.waso.amued,by,thejnthnt to get more
of It I did my best to take tholr point ot view.'
and though it was an embarrassment to find
myself appraising physically, as It thoy were
animation hire or.usetul blacks, a pair whom
I should have expected to meet only In oneot
the relations In, whloh 'criticism is tacit I
lookedatHrs. Monarch Judiciously enough to
be able to exclaim, after a . moment with oon
vlotloo: '" Oh, yes. a lady In a book 1" She
Was singularly like a bad Illustration.
.".We'llsUndwp. if you like." said the Major:
and he raised himself before me with a really
I eould take his measure at a gtanoo he was
six foot two and a perfect gentleman. It would
have 'paid any olub. In process ot formation
and in'want of a stamp, to engage him. at a
salary, to stand In the prlholpal window. What
stmokmo' immediately was that In coming to
me 'they had rather missed tholr vocation:
they could surely havo been turned to bettor
account for advertising purposes. I oouldn't
ot bourse, see the thing In detail: but I could
see tbera ,make somo one's fortune I don't
mean their own. There was something In
them for a waletooat maker, an hotel keeper,
or a soap vender. I could Imagine " Wo al
ways use It" pinned on tholr bosoms with the
greatest effect: I had a vision of the prompti
tude with whloh they would launch a table
Mrs. Monarch sat still, not from pride, but
from shyness, and presently hor husband said
to her: "Got up, my dear und-show how
smart you are." Hhe obeyed, but she had no
need to got up to show It Sho walked to tho
end, ot the studio, and then sho came back
blushing, with hor fluttorod eyes on hor hus
band. I was reminded of an inoldent I had ac
cidentally had n glimpse ot In Paris being
with a friend there, a dramatist about to pro
duoe a play wlion an aotress camo to him to
ask, to be lntrustod with a part She wont
through her paces before him. walked up and
down as Mrs. Monaroh was doing. Mrs. Mon
arch did quite as, welt but I abstained from
applauding. It was vory odd to seo suoh poo
ple apply for such poor pay. She looked as
it she had ten thousand a year. Hor husband
had used the word that described her: she was.
In the London current jargon, essentially and
typically "smart" Hor flguro was. In the
smo, order of ideas, conspicuously and Irre
proachably "good." For a woman of her age
her waist was surprisingly small: her elbow,
moroovor. had the orthodox crook. Bho held
her head at the conventional angle: but why
did she coma to me ? Bho ought to have tried
on jackets at a big shop. I feared my visitors
were not only destitute, but "artistic "which
would be a great complication. When she sat
down again I thanked her. observing that
what a draughtsman most valuod in his model
was the faculty tor keoplng quiet
"Oh, she can keep quiot" said Major Mon
aroh. Then he added jocosely: "I'vo always
kept hor quiet."
"I'm not a nasty fldget am I?" Mrs. Monarch-appealed
to hor husband.
He addressed his answer to me. "Perhaps
Jlsn'tout.ot,iplaoe to mention because we
ought to bo quite business-like, oughtn't wo?
that when I married her she was known as
"Oh dearl"- satd Mrs. Monaroh. ruefully.
" Of course I should want a certain amount
of expression." ITejolned.
."Of coursel" they both exclaimed.
"And then I suppose you know that you'll
get awfully tired."
"Oh. we never get tired I" they eagerly cried.
Hare you had any kind ot practice ?"
They hesitated they looked at each other.
"We've been photographed. Immensely." said
"She means the fellows have asked us."
added the Major.
"I see because you're so good-looking."
."I don't know what they thought but they
were always after us."
"We always got our photographs for noth
ing." Smiled Mrs. Monaroh.
."We might have brought some, my dear."
her husband remarked.
"I'm not sure we have any left Wo're si von
quantities away," she explained to me.
" With our iBUtoeraphs and that sort of
thing." said the Maior.
" Are they to.bo got in the shops?" I In
quired, as a harmless pleasantry.
"On. yesv-hers they unod to be."
"Not now," said Mrs. Monarch, with her eyes
on the floor.
' I could fancy the ."sort of thing" thy put
on tho presentation copies ot their plioto-
6 "raphe, and I was sure they wroto a beautiful
and. It was odd how quickly I was sure of
everything that concerned tbera. If they wore
now so poor a to havo to oarn shillings and
pence, thoy never hail had much of a mar
gin. Tholr good looks had been their
capital, and they had good humoredly main
the most of tho wrroer that this losmirce
marked out for thttm. It wih in their faces,
tho iilankuos. tho deep intellectual repovo of
th twenty years of country-house visit
ing .which had given them plea-ant In
tonations. 1 could nee tho sunuy draw
ing rooms, sprinkled with pcridiuals she
dmn't read, in which Mrs. Monnruh bad
continuously sat: 1 could xeu tho wet nhrub
berlex in which sho had wuIkciI, oijiilppod to
admiration for eUnor oxereive. I could see the
rloh Covers tho M ijor had holped to utioot, and
the. wonderful Kitrmentx in Wiilcli, late at
night lie rotialred to the flunking room to
talk about tliem I oould Imagine their leg
gings and waterproofs, their knowing twoeds I
and thru, tlieir roll of M lulls and cases ot I
tackle and Kent umbrollan: and I could evoke
thusact apuoaraiice of tholr two sorvants
and the oompaot variety of tholr luggage on
the platforms of country stations.
Tliey gave uraalt Him. hut they were liked;
ther did n t do anything themitelie. but they
wero weteome. flmv looked so well every
where: thoy mt Mod the irenoral relish for
stature, complexion, and " f inn." They knew
it without lutuliy or ulgarity, and thoy re
spected t.inm.Helv.'Htn oonneiiueui'e. They won
nutHUpcrlleUl; tney wore thorough and kept
themnolvi'H up it had lieon their line. Ite
spectaiili. ixmpIo hu I to Intvo some line. I
oould fl how. even In a dull house, they
could have lieeu counted upon for cheoiful
nuSH. At pro tint mi'netlilni; had happened
It didn't mutter wh.it. their littlo Income
hail grown leas it Iwri gr.nrn least and they
hud in do aomethlng for pocket money. Their
friends ilkndthuin. out didn't like to support
tno'iu Tnero was somotlilns aimut taein tiiat
represented erodlt-tliolr clothes, tnelr man
ners, their type; put ii credit In alarxo empty
lekct In whiiih an occasional chink rcverimr
nttu. the. chink at least must lie audible. What
tlicy wanted uf me was to help to inako it so.
Fortunately they had no children I soon
divined that They would alo perhaps wish
our relations to bekept secret; this was why It
was "for the figure." the reproduction of tho
fane would betray them.
I liked them they were so simple; and I
had no objection to them It they would suit
Hut somehow, with all. their perfctlons I
didn't easily believe tu them. After all. they
ware amateurs, and tho ruling passion of my
life was the detestation of tho umateur. Com
bined with this -was another perversity an
Innate preference for the. represented subject
over the real one. The defect of the real ono
was so apt to be a lock of representation. I
liked things that appeared; then one was sure.
Whether they were or not was a subordinate,
and ulmost always a tiresome, question. There
were other considerations, thoflrstof which
was that I already had two or three people In
use, notably a young person with big feet, in
alpaca, from Hllburn. who. for a ooupleof
years, had come to mo regularly for my
Illustrations, and with whom I was still per
haps Ignobly satlsned, I frankly uxplatned
to uiy visitors how the case stood; buttnev
had token more precautions than 1 supposed.
Tlieyhad reasoned out their opportunity, for
rlaude Hlvet had told theji n the projected
liliou a lust of one of the writers of our day
the rarest ot tho novelists who. long neglect
ed hy the multitudinous vulgar uud dearly
prized by the attentive Incod I mention l'lilllp
Vincent y) had hal the happy fortune of &tv
ing, lato In life, the dawn and then tho lull
light of a higher crltlrism an estimate In
which, on tho part of the punllc. th'-ro was
something really of oxpiatlnu. The edition In
question, planned by a publUhor of taste, was
practically an net of hlu'h reparation; the.
woodcuU with which It was to be onrlchod
were tbe homage nf hngluh art to
ono of the moi Independent, represen
FailvM ot English Utters. Major and
Mrs. Monarch confessed tu me that they had
hoped I might be able to work them Into my
bare if the enterprise- They knew, I was to
do tho first of the books. " Rutland Uamsay."
but I had to make elear to them that iny par
tJeipattonlnUierost ot the atfoir-this Orst
aatUfsntloalahonldgtv. .If .this should be
Baited ssy Mssloyan wttld drop mewWwvit
- M -
a scruple. Itwaathereforo a orlsla for me.
and naturally I was making special Piyphra
tlons, looking about for new people, if ther
should be neoessary. and aeourlng the 'best
types, I Hdmltted. however, that I should
like to settlq down to two or three good models
who would do for everything. . ,
"Bhouid we have often to-put on special
clothes?" Mrs. Monaroh timidly demanded.
"Dear, yes-that's halt the business.",
"And should we be expeoted to supply our
own oostumes?" ...... . ,. ,
"Oh. no: I'vo got a lot of things. Apa titer's
models put on-or put off anything he likes."
; And do you mean a tho same?"
Mrs. Monarch looked at her husband again,
"Oh. she was Just wondering," he explained.
"If -tho costumes are in general use." I had
to confess thot they wn, and I mentioned
further that some of them II had a tot of genu
ine, greasy, last-century things), had served
tholr time, a hundred yeaia ago. on. living,
world-stalnodmen and women. , We'll put on
anything that tits." said tho Major. ,
'Oh. 1 nrrongo that they fit In tho .pictures."
"I'm afraid f should do be tterforthe modern
books. I would come as you like," said Mrs.
"Sho has got a lot of clothes at home: they
might do tor contemporary lite." her husband
"Oh. I can fancy, scenes In which .you'd be
quite at home.'' And indeed 1, oould seethe
slipshod rearrangements ot stale properties
tho storiqs I tried to produce plotures for
without the exasperation ot reading. them
whoso sandy tracts the good lady, might help
to people. Hut I had to return to the fact that
for this sort of wprk-the dallymeohantoal
grind I was already equipped: the people I
was working with wore quite adoquato. ,
"We only thought wo might be more like
some characters," said Mrs. Monarch mildly,
Her husband also rose: he stood looking at
mo with a dim wlstfulness that was. touching
in so fine a man. "Wouldn't It be rather a pull
sometimes to have a to have ? He hung
tire; ho wanted mo to help him by phrasing
what ho meant. But I oouldn't I didn't know.
Ho ho brought it out awkwardly: ".The real
thing: a gentleman, you know, or a lady?" I
was qulto ready to give a general assent I ad
mitted that thoro was a great, deal in that
Shis enoouraged Major Monarch to. say. fpl
mdncuphls appeal with an unacted, gulp:
"It's awfully hard we've tried everything.
Tho gulp wus communicative: It, proved too
much for his wife. Betoro I knew It Mrs. Mon
arch had dropped again upon a divan and,
burst Into tears. Her husband sat down be
side her. holding one of hor hands: whereupon
she quickly dried hor eyes with tho other,
whilo I felt embarrassed as sho looked
up at mo, "Thoro isn't a confounded job I
haven't nppllod for waited for prayed for.
You oan fancy wo'd bo pretty bad first Seero
taryships und that sort of thing? You might
ns woll ask for u peerage. I'd bo anything
I'm strong: amessongor oracoalheaver. Id
put on a gold-laced cap and open oarrlage
doors in front ot the haberdasher's; I'd hang
about a station to carry portmanteaus: Id be
a postman. But thoy won't look at you : there
aro thousands as good as yourself already on
tho ground gentleman, poor beggars, that
havo drunk tholr wine, that have kept their
hunters!" , ... .,
I was as reassuring as I knew how to be. and
my visitors woro prosently on their foet again,
while, for tho oxperimont wo agreed on an
hour. Wo were discussing it when tho door
opened und MlssChurm oamo In with a wet
umbrella. MlssChurm hadtotako the omni
bus to Malda Vain and then walk halt a mile.
Bho looked a trifle blowsy and slightly splash
ed. I scarcely over saw hor como in without
thinking nfresh how odd it was that being so
little in horsolt, sho should yet be so much in
others. Bhe was a meagre littlo Miss Churm.
but sho was an ample heroine of romanco- Bhe
was a freckled cockney girl, but she oould
represent ovorythtng, from a fine lady to a
shepherdess, she had the faculty, as she
might have had a fine volco or long hair. She
couldn't spoil, and sho lovod boor, but she had
two or throo "points." and practice, and a
knaok and mother wit and a kind of whimsi
cal sensibility, and a lovo of tho theatre, and
sevon sisters, and not an ounce of respect es
pecially for tho A. Tho first thing my visitors
saw was that her umbrella was wet and in
their spotless porfoctlon they visibly winced
at It Tho rain had como on since their arrival.
"I'm all In a soak: tbpro was a mess of
people in tho 'bus. I wish you lived near a
stytJon." said Miss Churm. I requested her
to get ready as quickly as possible, and she
passed into tho toom in which she always
changed her dress. But before going out she
asked me what she was to got into this time.
"It's the Russian princess. don't you know?"
said I: "the ono with the 'golden eyes.' In black
velvet for the long thing in the Cheapslde."
"Golden ores? I say I" cried Miss Churm.
while my companions watohed her with inten
sity as she withdrew. Bhe always arranged
hersplf. when sho wus late, before I could turn
round; and I kept my visitors a little, on pur
pose, so that they mightgetan Idea, from see
ing her, whatwnuld be expected ot themselves.
I mentioned that she was quite, my notion of
an excellent model; she was really very clever.
"Do you think sho looks liko a Russian prin
cess?" Major Monaroh asked, with lurking
" Whon I mnko hor. yes."
"Oh, If you huvo tu make heir I" he rea
"That's the most you can ask. There are ao
many that aro not makahle."
" Well. now. hero's a lady "and with a ner
suasiwi smile ho passed his arm into his wife's
"who'Hiilrea ly nuidel"
"Oh. I'm not a Busslan princess. Mrs.,Mon- I
arch protested, a littlo coldly. I could see that I
f he had known xome and didn't like them. I
There, immediately, was a complication of. a I
kind tlmt I nevor had to fear with MlssChurm. I
This young lady came back In black velvet
theguwn was rather rusty and very low on her
loan Mhould?rs and with a Japanese fan In her
red h mds. I reminded her that in the scene I
was doing she must look oversotqeone's head.
"I forgot whose It is; but It doesn't matter.
Just look ovor a head."
"I'd rather look, over a stove, said Miss
Churm: and she took her station near the
fire, bhe full into position, settled herself Into
a t'kll attitude, guvu a cortsln backward Incli
nation to hor head uud a certain forward
droop to her fun. and looked, at least to my
prejudiced sense, distinguished and charm
ing, foreign and dangerous. We left her look
ing so. while I went down stairs with Major
and Mrx. Monarch. "I think I could oomeas
nour to Una that." said Mrs. Monarch.
'.'Oh yoii think she's ebabby. hut you must
nllow for the alchemy of art." However, they
went oiT with an evident increase nf comfort
founded on their demonstrable advantage In
being the leal thing. I could fancy them shud
during murMliM Churm. Bhe was vory droll
nbout them when I went back, for I told her
what they wanted. .. . . .
" Well, if she can sit I'll toko to bookkeep
ing." said my model. '
' Bho h vory ladylike I roplled. as an inno
cent form of aggravation. ,
"Ho much tho worao for you. That moans
sh 1'iin't turn round." . . . ...
"Khu'll no for tho fashlonahlo novels."
"Oli. yes. she'll do for them I" my model
humoriiiftly doolarod. "Ain't they bad enough
without her ?" I had often sociably denounced
them to Miss Churm.
To be Continued.
SKILFUL I OCX rtCKIBtl.
Found the Klsht One of a Hundred Million
omb'natloa la AO Mlanlea.
Frnn th Prortdenn Jour '.
In the Mayor's offleo at the City Hall there
Is a 1 irgn Mifo used for storing publlo docu
ment''. The eufo Is sat Into the wall and was
placed there whon tho structure was built In
side is, a steel burglar-proof otiost having a
four-bo:t Vale combination lock. The sate also
tins romhinatlon look. After the death ot
Mayor Doyle in lHtKl the little chest was found
to bo securely locked and nobody bnd tho com
bination. It thon developed that Mayor Doyle
wat the only, person who knew tho numbers
by which tho chest could be opened, and ac
cordingly It remained securely fastened, no
body having any Idea of the contents. The
chest was unopened thiough the terms of
Mjiyor D lyle's euocetsori. until yesterday.
when Mayor Pottor took charge ot affairs he
learned tho history of the steel ohet and a
short time ugo read tho account ot how Her
bert ri. .Pace, the expert safe opener of Charles
town. Mass., fathomed the mysteries ot the
most Intricate safe looks with ease. A combi
nation of natural curiosity and desire to know
Whether or not any publlo documents were in
the stool compartment Induced tho Mayor to
forward a oommunlcatlon tn Mr. Pago
requesting him to com" to this city, and it
possible open tho little sale. Mr. Page
arrived yesterday afternoon, and In the
presence uf h number of city officials com
menced the work, lie found the look a mnst
intricate one, being cananle of 100,000,000
chances. He labored forty minutes, und at
tho end of the time the bolts swung back and
the door opened. There was nothing In the
Alter opening the door Mr, Page studied out
tho combination and discovered that tbe com
bination, which It was believed had died with
Mayor Doyle, was 7w.50-t-&iJ. The look was
designed especially. to. prevent opening by
sense of touch, and Mr. Page was highly oom
pllmented for his sklllul work.
JLn Excited I vans Us.
j; dm ll i SI. W' KrpMle.
DuBuqvt, la . March Ul. The revival raoet
Incut Grand View Avenue Methodist Church
l.tst night In okoup In u row, llev'v.illst Onr
look passed among the nudlem u udtlslng sin
ners to step up to the uiixIouh Heat. Among
others ho ad v I 'I'd u youiiiijudy from Ohio,
visiting Mrs. William O. Wallers. Hhe de
clined. On returning to the platform the re
vivalist denounced church members for inter
fering belwpen him und the sinners. Mrs.
Walters Declared dio hail not Interfered.
" Yes. you did. Oarlock shouted in a rage,
"und if you cross my patbnguln I'll strike you
as soon as I would a man."
At this a chorus ot hisses arose, and Mrs.
V You have not spoken a word of truth since
you have been in that pulpit
.All was now confus on. and in the midst of it
the pastor, the Rev. Mr.'WWt declared the
meeting ended. Mrs. Wattsrs it a bwadw of
out of Dubuque's Ant (amlu,
Till! GERMAN CHICAGO,
Nuiers.Hd Cistois r Ihe Berlin
GffitiaU Street Rmkers and
Slides A Comers' in
Heier ef Virchtw.
OwrffK IMJ. tfS.L. CTrninu.
I feel lost in Berlin. It haa no resemblance to
the olty I had supposed It wax. There was
once a Berlin whloh I would have known from
dsscriptlonsin, books the Berlin ot the last
century and the beginning ot the present one:
a dingy city In a marsh, with rough streets,
muddy and lantern lighted, dividing straight
rows of ugly houses all alike, oompacted Into
block as square and plain and uniform and
monotonous and serious as so many dry
goods boxos. But that Berlin has disappeared.
It seems to have disappeared totally and
left no sign. The bulk of tho Berlin of to-day
haa about it no suggestion of a former period.
The site It stands on has traditions and a his
tory, but the olty Itself has no traditions and
no history. Itlsanewctty; the newest I have'
ever seen. Chicago would seom vener able be
side It: tor there are many old-looting dis
tricts In Chicago, but not many in Berlin. The
main mats of ithe olty looks as If it had been
built last week, the rest ot It has a just percep
tibly graver tone, and looks aa It it might be
six or even eight months old.
The next feature that strike one is the spa
ciousness, the rooinlnoss ot the olty. There Is
no othor city In any country whose street are
so genorally wldo. Berlin Is not merely a olty
of wldo streets. It is tht oltv of wldo streets.
A a wide-street city it has nevor had Its equal
In any age ot the world. " Untor den Linden "
Is three streets In one; the Potsdamerstrasse
Is bordered on both aides by sidewalks which
aro thomselves wider than some of the his
toric thoroughfares ot the old European capi
tals: there seem to be no lanes or alleys:
there are no shortcuts: hers and there, where
several important etreota empty into a com
mon centre, that centre's olroumference is of
a magnitude calculated to bring that word
spaciousness Into your mind again. The park
in the middle of the city Is so huge that It calls
up that expression onco more.
The next feature that strikes one is the
stralghtness of the streets. Tho short ones
haven't so muoh as a waver in them ; the long
ones stretch out to prodigious distances and
then tilt a little to the right or left, then
'stretch out on another immense reach as
straight as a ray of light A result of this ar
rangement la that at night Berlin Is an Inspir
ing sight to see. Oaa and the electrlo light are
employed with a wasteful liberality, and so,
wherever one goes, he has always double
ranks ot brilliant lights stretching far down
Into the night on every hand, with here and
there a wide and splendid constellation of
them spread out ovor an Intervening " platz."
and between the Interminable double proces
sion ot streot lamps one has the swarming
and darting cab lamps, a lively and pretty ad
dition to the fine spectacle, for thoy counter
felt the rush and confusion and sparkle of an
invasion of fireflies.
There Is one other nottoeable feature, the
absolutely level surface ot tbe slto of Borllu.
Berlin, to recapitulate, is newer to the eye
than is any other city, and also blonder of
complexion and tidier; no other city has such
an air of roominess, freedom from crowding;
no other city has so many straight streets; and
with Chicago it contests the ohromo for flat
ness of surface and for phenomenal swiftness
of growth. Berlin Is the European Chicago.
Thetwooltles have about the same popula
tion, say a million and a half. I cannot speak
In exact terms, because I only know what Chi
cago's population was week before last: but at
that time It was about a million and a half.
Fifteen years ago Berlin and Chicago were
large cities, of course, but neither ot them was
the giant it now Is.
But now the parallels fail. Only parts of
Chicago are stately and beautiful, whereas all
ot Berlin is stately and substantial, and It is
not merely in parts but uniformly beautiful.
Tbera are buildings In Chloago that are archi
tecturally finer than any In Borlin. I think, but
what I have just said abovo is still true. Theso
two flat 'cities would lead tho world for phe
nomenal good health it London was out of the
way. As it Is, London leads by a point or two.
Berlin's -death rate Is nineteen in a thousand.
Fourteen years ago it was a third higher.
Berlin is a surprise 'in a great many ways
In a multitudo of ways, to speak strongly and
be exact It seems to be the most governed
city In the world, but one must admit that It
also seems to bo the. best governed. Method
and system are obsorvable on every hand
In great things, tn little things. In all details,
of whatsoever size. And it Is not method and
system on paper, and there an end it is meth
od and system In practice. It has a rule for
everything and puts tho rule In forco; puts
It in force against the poor and the pow
erful aliko. without favor or prejudice. It
deals with groat matters and mlnuto particu
lars with equal faithfulness and with a plod
ding and painstaking diligence and persist
ency which compel admiration and some
times regret There aro several taxes, and
thoy are collected quarterly. Collcoted is the
word; thoy are "not meroly levied, thoy are
collected every tlmo. This makos light taxes.
Itlsln'oltiesind countries where a consider
able part of the oommunlty shirk payment
thattaxoshaveto be lifted to a burdonsome
rate. Here the police keep coming, calmly
and patiently. .until you pay your tax. Thoy
charge you Ave or ten cent per visit of tor the
first call. By experiment you will find that
tbsy will presently collect that money.
Inone respeot tho 1.500.000 of Berlin's popu
lation are like a family. The head ot this large
family knows the names of Its sovor.il mem
bers and whore the said member are locitod.
and when and where they were born, and
what they do for a living, an J what their re
ligious brand Is. Whodver oomos to Berlin
must furnish those particulars to the p illce
Immediately; moreover, It he knows how long
he Is going to stay ho must say so. If he takes
a bouse he will be t txo 1 oi the rent and taxed
also on his income. Ha will not bo asked what
his Inoome is, and so he may save some lies
for home consumption. The police will esti
mate his Inoome from the house rent he pays
and tax him on that basis.
Duties on imported articles are collected
with inflexible fldollty. be the sum largo or
little: but the methods are gentle, prompt
and full of the spirit of acoommoilatlon. The
postman attends to tho wholo mittorforyou
in cases where the arttclo comes by mall, and
you have no trouble and suffer no Inconven
ience. The other day a friend of tnlno was In
formed that there was a pookage IntheFost
Office for him containing a lady's silk belt
with gold clasp, and a gold chain to hang a
bunch ot keys on. In his first agitation he
was going to try to bribe the postman to chalk
It'through. but acted upon his sobor second
thought and allowed the matter to tike Its
proper and regular ocurse. Iu a littlo while
the postman brought the paoksgo and made
these several collections: Duty on the silk
belt 7S' cents; duty on tho gold chain. 10
oents; charge for fetohlng the package, fi
cents. These devastating Imposts are exacted
for the protection of Gorman home Industries.
The calm, quiet courtoous, cussed persist
ence of the police is the mostadmlriblo thing
I havo encountered on this side. Thoy under
took to persuade me to send and get a pass
port for e Bwlss msld wham wo had brought
with us, and at the end of six weeks of patient
tranquil, angolio dally effort thoy succeed. I
was not Intending to give them trouble, but I
was lazy and I thought they would get tired.
Meanwhile they probably thought I would be
the one. It turned out just to.
One Is not allowed to build unstable, unsafe,
or unsightly houses in Berlin. The result Is
this comely and conspicuously stately city,
with it security from oonflagratlons and
breakdowns. It itbufltol architect oral Olb.
rattar. The Building Commissioner Inspect
while the building Is going up. It has been
found that this Is better than to wait till It tall
down.' These people are full of whims.
One I not allowed to cram poor folk Into
cramped and dirty tenement house. Eaoh
individual must have just so many cublofeet
ot room spaoe, and sanitary Inspections are
systematic and frequent
Everything Is orderly. The Are brigade
march In rank, curiously uniformed, .and so
grave is their demeanor thnt they look like a
Salvation Army under conviction of sin. Peo
ple tell me that whon a Are alarm I sounded
the firemen assemble calmly, answer to tholr
names when the roll Is called, and then pro
ceed to tho fire. There they are ranked up, mil
itary fashion, and told off tn detachments by
the chief, who parcels out to tho detachments
tho several parts of the work which they are
to undertako in putting out the fire. , This Is
all dono with low-voiced propriety, and stran
gers think theso people aro working a funeral.
Asnrulotheflrelsoonflnod to a slnglo floor
in these great masses of brloks and masonry,
and consequently there Is little or no lntorest
attaching toa Are here fortbe rest of the oocu
pant of tho house.
Thorenro abundance ot newspapers In Ber
lin, and there was also a newsboy, but ho died.
At Intervals ot halt a mllo on" the thorough
fares there nre booths, and It Is. at these that
you buy your papers. There aro plenty ot
theatres, but they do not advertise In a loud
way. Thoro nre no big posters ot any kind,
and the display of vast type and of picture of
actors and performance framed on a big scato
and done tn rainbow colors is a thing unknown.
It the big showbills existed there would be no
place to exhibit them, for there aro no poster
fenoes, and one would not be allowed to dis
figure dead walls with them. Unsightly things
aro forbidden hero: Borlin is a rest to tho eye.
And yet the saunterer can easily And out
what Is going on at tho theatres. All over tho
city at short dlstanooa apart there are Boat
round pillars eighteen feet high and about as
thick as a hogahoad.and on these the littlo black
and white theatro bills and other notloes are
pasted. Ono generally finds a group around
each pillar roadlng these things. There are
plonty ot things In Berlin worth Importing to
America. It Is those that I havo particularly
wlshod to make a noto ot. Whon Buffalo Bill,
was here his biggest potter was probably not
larger than tho top of an ordinary trunk.
Thoro Is a multiplicity of clean And oom
fortablo horso cars, but whenever you think
you know whoro a oar Is going to. you had
better stop ashoro, because that car Is not go
ing to that placo at all. Tho car routes are
marvellously intricate, and often the drivers
get lost and aro not heard ot for years. The
slgna on tho cars furnish no details as to tho
coursoof tho journey: thoy name the and ot
It and thon oxperlmont around to see how
much territory they can cover before thoy get
there. The conductor will colloct your faro
over again every few miles and glvo you a
ticket which he hasn't apparently kept any
reoord of, and you keep It till an inspector
oomes aboard by and by and tears a corner off
It (which he does not koep): then you throw
the ticket away and got roady to buy another.
Brains ore of no valuo whon! you aro trying to
navlgato Berlin in a horso oar. When tho
ablest of Brooklyn's editors was hero on a visit
he took n horso car in tho oarly morning and
wore it out trying to go to a point in the centre
of tho city. He was on board all day and spent
many dollars tn fares, and thon did not arrive
at the placo which ho had started to go to.
This is tho most thorough way to see Berlin,
but It is also the most expensive.
But there are excellent features about the
oar system, nevertheless. The car will not
stop for you to get on or off except at oertaln
places a block or two apart where there 1 a
sign to Indicate that that Is a halting station.
This system saves many bones. There are
twenty places Inside tho cor; when theso seats
are filled no more can enter. Four or Ave
persons may stand on each platform the law
decrees the number and when these standing
places are all occupied the next applicant Is
refused. As there fs no crowding, and as no
rowdyism is allowed, women stand on the
platforms as well as men. They often stand
thoro when there aro vacant seats inside, for
theso places are comfortable, thore being little
or no jolting. A native tells me that when tho
first car was put on. thirty or forty years ago.
thepu'ilio had such a terror of it that they
didn't feel safe Inside of it or outside either.
They mado tho company keep a man at ovory
crosslne with a red flag In his hand. Nobody
would travel in the car except convicts on the
way to tho gallows. This mado business In
only one direction, and tho car had to go bask
light. Tosavotho company the city Govern
ment transferred tho convlot cemetery to the
other end of the line. This made traffic tn both
directions and kept the company from going
under. This sounds llko somo of the Informa
tion which travelling foreigners aro furnished
with In America. To my mind It has a doubt
ful ring about It.
The Brat-class cab is neat and trim, and has
Ieather-aushioned seats and a swift horse,
Tho second class cab is an ugly and lubborly
vehicle, and is always old. It seems a strango
thing that thoy have never built any newohes.
btlll. it such a thing wore done everybody that
had timo to flock would flock to seo it and
that would make a crowd, and tho police do
not like crowds and disorder here. If there
wero an uarthquako in Berlin the police would
tsko charge of it and conduct It In that sort ot
orderly way that would make you think It was
a prayer meeting. That In what an earth
quake generally onds In, but this one would
bo different from tlios.i othors: it would bo
kind ot softand self-contained, llko. a Itopub
llcati praying for a Mugwump.
For a course la quarter ot an hour or less),
nne pays 'Si cents in n first-class rah. and 15
cents in a second class. Tho first class will
take you along faster, for, tho second class
horso Is old alwaysold.as old as tils cab. some
authorities say and ill fod and weak. Ho has
been a first class once, but has been degraded
to second clhss for long and faithful service.
Btlll. he must tako you us far for 15oonta
as the other horso takes you for '-'."). If he
can tdohlsilfteen-mtnute distance in fifteen
minutes he must htllldo thudi'tunco forthe
15 cent". Any stranger can check tho dis
tance off bv means or tho most curious man I
am acquainted with. It Is issued by tho olty
Government, and can bit bought In any shop
for u trifi'i. In it every streot Is sectioned off
like a string nf long beads of different colors.
Each long bo id represents a rainuto's travel,
and whon yoj havo covnrod fifteen of the
beads ynu have got your money's worth. This
map ot HiTlIn Is a gay-oolured marc, and looks
like pictures of tho circulation of tho blond.
The streote uro very clean. They are kopt so
not by praiur ajid talk and tho other .Sew
York methods, but by dally and hourly work
with scrapera and brooms; and when an as
phalted street his boon tidily scraped nftor a
rain or u light snowfall, they scattxr clenn
snnd ovor it. This saves somo uf tho horses
Irom fulling down. In fuctthls is u city gov ern
nient which scorns to stop ntroexponsu where
thopubllcoonvenlunoe. comfort, and health are
conouriied-xcopt in one detail. That Is. the
naming of tho streets and tho numbering nf
the houses. Sometimes thfl name of astieot
will rhango In the middle of a block. You wilt
not find It out till you get to the next corner
and discover the new name on the trail, and of
course ynu don't know just when the change
The names are plainly marked on the. cor
nerson all tho oorners-thoro are no excep
tions.. But tho numbering ot the houses
there has never baon anything llko It since
original chaos , It Is not possible that It was
dono by this wise city Government At llrst
one thinks It was dono by an idiot: but there
is too muoh variety ubnut It for that: an Idiot
could not think of so many different ways of
muklng confusion and propagating blasphemy.
The numbors run up ono side of the street and
down, tho other. That Is endurable but the
rest isnt They often uso one number tor
throo or tour houses, and sometimes
they put the number on only one
nf the houses and let ynu guoss at
the othors. Hometlmi-s they puts number on
a liouso t, for Instance then put 4a. 4b, 4e,
on. tho suocoeding houses, and one becomes
old and decrepit before no finally arrives nt 5.
A, result of this nyxtoraless system Is that
when, you nre at No. 1 in a street you haven't
nny idea how far t may ho tn No 150; It may
be only six or oig it nlocks it may bo a couple
of miles. Frederick street is long, and la one
of the great thoroughfares. The othor day a
man put up his money bohlnd the assertion
that there wero m ire refroslimnt places In
that street than mini ior o:i tho houses -und
he won. There were '-'"il numbers and 257
refreshment placo. Vol as I havo nuld, It litu
Hut tho worst feature .f nil this complex
business is that In Un-lln tho nu'iibers do not
travel In any ono direction ; no. thoy travel along
until thoy gut to 00 ontu. perhaps, thon mid.
denly you und yourself up In the hundrnds
140. may he; the next will be KM; then ynu
perooivu bv that sign that tho numbers are
now travelling toward ou,from tho opposite
dlroctlon. They will keen that sort of insanity
up as long as you travel that street: every now
and then the numbers will turn and run the
other way. As a rule there Is an arrow undr
the number, to show by tho dlrcollon of It
flight which way tbe numbers are proceeding.
There are a good many suloldes in Berlin: I
have seen six reported In a single day Tbsre
Is always a deal of learned and laborious argu
ing and ciphering suing on as to the cause oi
thii state ot thing. If they will set to work,
and number their houses In a rational way.,
perhaps they will And outwhat was the matter.
Hovers! month ngo Berlin begin-to nre
pare to celebrate Prof..Vlrchow' evenUtn
birthday. When tho birthday arrived, the
middle of October, It teemed tome that all the
world of solenoe arrived with lt:.deputaton
of ter deputation came, bringing tho homage
and reverence ot far ettles, and centres, ot
learning, and during the whole of a long day
the hero of It sat and received such witness of
his greatnoss us has seldom been vouchsafed
tn any man In nny walk of life In any time, an
cient or modern. Those demonstrations wero
continued In one form or another day attor
day. and worn prosently merged In similar
demonstration to his twin In solenco and
achievement Prof. Helmhnlte. whoso seven
tieth birthday is soparated from Vlrchow's by
only nbout three weeks; so nearly as this did
theso two extraordinary men come to being
born together. Two suoh births have seldom
signalized a slnglo year In human history.
But perhaps the flnal and dosing demonstra
tion was peculiarly grateful to them. This
was a comment given In their honor the other
night by l.OUO students. It was held in a huge
hall, voir long and vory lofty, which had live
galleries, far abovo everybody's head, whloh
were crowded with ladles tour or five hun
dred, I judged. It was beautifully decorated
with clustered flags and various ornamental
devices, and was brilliantly lighted. On tho
spacious floor of this placo were ranged In
Mob Innumerable tables, seating twenty-four
persons each, extondlng from ono end of the
great hall cloar to tho other and with narrow
aisles between the Ales. In the centre on one
side was a high and tastefully decorated plat
form, twenty or thirty feet long, with along
table on It behind which rat the half dozen
chiefs of the choir ot tho commers In the rich
modltevnl costumes of as many different col
lego corps. Bohlnd those youths a band of
musicians was concealed. On the floor di
rectly in front ot this platform were halt a
dozen tables, whtfth were distinguished from
the outlyins continent of tablos by bolng oov
ered Instead of left naked. Of these the oontral
table was reserved for the two heroes ot the
occasion and twenty particularly eminent pro
fessors ot tho Borlin University, snd the othor
covered tables were for tho occupancy ot a
hundred loss distinguished professors.
I was glad to he honored with a plaoe at the
tablo ot the two heroes of the occasion, al
though I was not really learned enough to
desorve It Indeed there was a pleasant
strangeness In being la suoh company: to he
thus associated with twonty-threo men who
forgot moro everyday than I ever know. Yet
there was nothing ombaransslng about It bo
cause loaded mon and empty onos look about
alike. I knew that to that multitude thoro I
was a professor. It requited but little art to
patch the ways and attitudes of those men and
Imitate them, and I had no difficulty In look
ing as much llko a professor as anybody there.
We arrived oarly. so oarly that only Profes
sors Vtrohow and Helmholtz and a dozen
guests of tho special tables wero ahead of us,
and 300 or 400 students. But people wero ar
riving In floods now, and within fifteen min
ute all but the special tables wero occupied
and the groat houso was crammed, the aisles
included. It was said that thero were 4.000
mon present It was a most animated scene,
thero Is no doubt about that: It -was a stu
pendous beehive. Atoach ond of each tablo
stood a corps studont In the uniform of his
corps. Those quaint costumes aro ot brilliant
corlorod silks and volvots, with Bomotlmes a
high plumed hat somotimes a brood Hcotoh
oap, with a great plunr.e wound about it some
times oftonost a little shallow embroidered
silk oap on the tip of tho crown llko an
inverted saucer; sometlmos the pantaloons
nro snow whtto, sometimes of other colors;
the boots In nil cases come up well abovo the
knoe : and In all cases, also, whlto gauntlets
nre worn. The sword is a rapier with a bowl
shapod guard for the hand, painted In soveral
colors. -Each corps- has a uniform of its own.
and all are nf rich material, brilliant in color
and exceedingly ploturosque ; for thoy are
survivals of tho vanished costumes ot tho mid
dle ages, and thoy reproduce for us the time
when mon wero beautiful to look at The
student who stood guard at our ond ot the
table was ot grave countenance and groat
framo and graco ot form, and ho was doubt
less an uocurato reproduction, olothes and all.
of some ancestor of his of two or throo eon
turios ago-u reproduction as far as tho out
side tho animal man. goes, I mean.
As I say. tho place was now crowded. The
noarost atslo was packed with studonts stand
ing up. and they mado a fenco which shut off
the rest of tho houso from view. As far down
this fenco as you could see all these wholo
somo young faoos wero turned In one direc
tion, all these Intent and worshipping eyes
were centred upon one spot tho place where
Vlrchow and Helmholtz sat The boys seemed
lost to everything, unoonsclous of their own
existence. Thoy devoured those two Intellec
tual giants with their eyes, they feasted upon
them, and the worshlpthat was In tholr hearts
shone in their faces. It seemed to me that I
would rather be flooded with a glory like that
instinct with sincerity, innocent of self-seeking,
than win a hundred battles and broak a
There was a big mug of beer In front of each
ot us, and more to come when wanted. There
was also a quarto pamphlet containing the
words of the songs to be sung. After the
names of the officers ot the feast were these
words in largo type: " II llhrrnd den Kom
merit herrtcht allgemeiner BuraJnede." I was
notabloto translate this to my satisfaction,
but a professor helped me out This was his
explanation: The students in uniform belong
to different colloge corps. Not all students be
long to oorps : nono join the corps except those
who enjoy lighting. The oorps students tight
duels with swords every wook. ono corps chal
lenging another corps to furulsh a certain
number of duellists for the occasion, and it is
only on this battlefield that students of . differ
ent oorps exchange courtesies. In common
llfo thoy do not drink with each other or speak.
The ubove lino now translates itself: there Is
truce during the Commers: war is laid aside
and fellowship takes its place.
Now tho performance began. The concealed
band played a piece of martial music; then
thore was a pause. Tho students on the plat
form rose to their foet: tho middle one gave a
toast to tho Cmporor, then all the houso rose,
mugs In hand. At the call "One. two. three I
all glasses were drained and then brought
down with a slam on the tables In unison. The
result was ,in good an Imitation of thunder as
I havo over heard: From now on. during an
hour, thero was slnclng In mighty ononis.
During each intorvul hetwoen eongsa number
of tho 6peolal guests tho professors arrived.
Thero scorned to bo somo signal whereby the
studonta on tho platform were made awaro
that n professor had urrived at the ro
mote door of entrance, for ynu would
soe them suddenly rise to their feet
strike an erect military attitude, then
draw tholr swords; the swords of all their
brethren standing guard at the Innumerable
tablos would flash from tho scabbards und be
held aloft a handsome spectacle. Thieo
clear bugle notes would ring out. then all
these swords would como down with a crash.
tWIco ropeated. on the tables, and bo uplifted
and hold aloft again; then in the distance you
would see the gay uniforms and uplifted
words of a guard of honor clearing tho way
and conducting tho guost down to his place.
The snugs wero stirring, and tho Immense out
pour from young llfo ana young lungs, thocrash
ot swords, and the t Hinder of the beor mugs
Sraduully worked a body up to what soomod
le last possible summit ot oxcltement It
surely seemed to me that I had reached that
summit, that I had reached my limit, and that
thore was no higher lift devisable for
mo. When apparently tho last eminent
8uest had Inng ago taken his place, again
ioso throo bugle blasts rang nut, and onco
more the swords leaped from their seaboards.
Who might tills late comer be , Nobody
was intoiusted tn Inquire. Mill. Indolont eyes
were turnod toward tho distant entrance, and
wo saw tho silknn gleam and tho lilted swords
of a guard of honor ploughing through the re
mote crowds. Then wo haw that cud of tho
house rising tn Its foot: saw It rlo anroasrthe
advancing guard all along. Ilkea wave. This
supreme honor had been offered to no ono be
fore. Thon thero was an incited whisper at
our table "Mnraui sen !"-nnd the wholo House
rose-rose and shouted and stamped and
clapped and banged tho beer mugs. Just
simply a storm! Then the littlo man with his
long hair and Emersnniau face edged his way
past us and to k hlsse.it loiud havo touched
lilm with my hnnd-.Mommsen!-thlnk of itl
This was ono of thoso immense surprises
that can hnpiion ouly a few times in one s life.
I wasnotdroubilnsof him: he was to mo only
a giant myth, a world-shadowing sped re, not
a reality. The surprise of It ail can be only
comparable to a man's suddenly coming upon
Mont-Banc. with lunwful form towering Into
the sky when ho ilidn t suspoct ho was in Its
neighborhood. I would I haw; .walked a great
many miles U get a sight of him. and hore lie
was. without trouble nr tramp or cost of any
kind. Hero ho was. clothed In a Titanic do
ceptlvo mJdo-ty which mado him look like
other men. Here ho was, carrying the Roman
world and ad tin; Cicsnrs In his hospitable
sku I and doing it as easily as that other
luminous vault, tho skull of tho universe,
cairles tho milky way and the constellations.
One nf the professors said that once upon a
time an American young lady was introduced
toMommsiin. andlouniriierself badly acarad
and sneechlos Sho dreaded to ee his mouth
Unclose, for she was expecting him to chooso
a subject sooral miles ubovo her pomnrohon
Mion.anddllnotsuppis" ho could got down
to tile world that other people lived In: hut
wheo hl remark oumo horterrnrdlsappeareil:
"Well, how do you do t Hsn you read How-ells?Hla-t
hook rithnkll's his host."
Tin ,u tHi'i'iTiMiionlos of the nwnlnsclnson
with the speeches uf w'lu inn, delUurod by
two s'u l"iils. on I the replies in ulo by Profs.
Vlr'lmw and Helmholtz.
Vlri'li w hn I ng neon a member nf the city
Oowniniontnf llerlln. He wirks ns luiril for
tlic I'll' .is does any other itorllii Alderman,
and -'! the same pav nothing. I don't know
that wi In America could enture to ask our
inoit Illustrious citizen tn serve on a Hoard of
Aldermen, und if wo might venture it lam not
fxi,tloly sure that wo could elect him But
lore the municipal Bystein is such that the
best mon In the city consider It an honor to
serve gratis as Udcrmon. and thn people have
tho good Honeto prefer these mon end to elect
them year after year. As a result, Berlin is a
thoroughly well.governod city. It Is a free
olty; its affairs aro not meddled with by the
Utatei.they are managed by Its own citizen,
and after method of their own devising
. , , aUur, Twin, j
, DED'CE TO PAY IN MOROCCO.
a am zxpBAirT luxnra rmm mvz
ta our or novas axd boms,
Aa Amy 9tf Mea IAvta ea BUefc
Otlveaaa ( Wkat tka )rtrMk May
Xxpec If Ther root la aa fasls
rhotestraish link Atatr4 la fas- f
Iek Oat for the Mhelk of Btrohhaaot
Borne lively news from the Desert otMoroeco.
through which Sldl Hadj La Rbee i tald to be '
marching with 60,000 men to meet the French,
oomes by letter from Bio Hassan Ben All Al
Morabet 81e Hassan is a bright-eyed, slen
der, and volublo young Arab, who came to this
country last summer to And out about th
Columbian Fair and arrange for exhibiting
In Chloago some odd people and thing I
from his home. Morocco. Ha write '
trom "Tafllet in the Desert ot Morocco,
Africa." Hi letter aro well travelled
epistles by the time they reach New York.
There 1 a breezy originality In their ityl
and spelling whloh ought to be refreshing,
even In the desert And ha gets news Into
them. too. To read one la like travelling
through the far-away corner of Africa from ' J
whloh he despatches them. He write to an
American acquaintance: I
"Mr Dun Bib: It Is good thought ot my J
American Frlonds That lead me to writ I
those fowltnestolotyouknowthatlam herein I
this Hoto Country Amoung my Native people. I
When I Arlved Tangier on the last December M
1801 1 only Remain In that city for8 'days only. 1
I started for Foz the oapltal city of marocoo M
to seo the Sultan about the world' Fearot M
American In 1803. My caravan trom Tangier
To Foz consest of Sixty people 11 Dunks
donkeys and 20 Camols and 0 Horse and 1 1
MulslmulosL I did had vory Bad Treape trip '
from Tangier To Fez. The Benin very Bad.
Roads plenty of mudotmud). theltlver Buns
very High, no Brldgos. it was 11 large River
Between Tangier and Fez. The River of Bebbo
was tho largest In thoso 11 Rivers I lost
great Deal of my provatlon provisions!.
Tho swomors IswlmmorsJ who helped us to
cross thin great rlvor they have no clothing on
thorn at all. it is very funny to tee the small
Darkos negroes sworn acrouss the river. The
muls mules and horses went across all
wrlght tiut dunkes donkeys and camels ther
did had vory hard time.
"Any how we made the journey between
Tanglor and oz in 10 days. In the flne
weather mon can go rrom Tangier to Fez In 5
days. Any how we all got to Fez safe.
'I did bob the Sultan, and I had quite good
talk with him. I Bhowod him some photos of
those Hay buildings In Chloago. It is forbid
den to use, photos of any klned among the
Mohammedan, but the way I worked the
scheem In showing tho photos to the Sultan
was vory dofeeult. I mado tho photos of great
interest to tho Uultanheforo I show them to
him. ThoUultan ot Morocco In hi palace
among his Imrrom ot over five hundrod wlvos
was voir muah Pleased with tho news I give
him about American world. The Hulran was
very glad, so that he give me one of hi
finest Horse with his saddle cost over
3 Hundred Dollars. I will got the Horse to
amorican Sure. Also he give me permatlon to
take the Famouso Troupe- of Bone Zog Zog
Arabs 15 in number to Amorioan. This Troupa
is tho greatest and the most amusing Troupe
ofarabslnthe world. The Sultan never per
mat to theso pooplo to go to Christian Countries
Befor. The Bui tan likes the American people
very much because thoy do not Bother him
llko those other Nations.
" The Kllphant which queen of England give
Srosont to tho Hultan was a Big felow, but the
toors did not like him very much because ha
eats one Hunderd laofsnf Bread and 5 pound
of Buger and 3 pound of Butter Every Day.
" I was to be in Tangier 15 of this month but
tho orders com out agean from the Button that
I most go and satoi som Trubel settle some
troublojinthls part ot the country, so I am
here In Tafotalt with two thousend Buldgea
soldiers. Sldl Hadj La rbee. the Bhiek nt
Derckama. or the chelf of Dorvtshls. is march
ing through the Desert with 50 thousend men
to meet the Frinch army in the Oases of Toat
In fact it the Frinch atempt Tn pot his Foot In.
he will be very surry sure. The army ot thl
great Chelf is Increased all the time, and they 1
eat nothing but Black Olives and Dates. I
"This new llfo to me. I do not get enough. I
sleep In this country as I get In the C. H. I 2
am now gotlng through my work here. lex- mt
pecttobe in Tangier In February. I will get '
with me to America this troupe of Bene Zog M -
Zog Arabs for Messrs. Barnum & Bailera. 3;
Greatest Show on Erth. To-day I received a
massage from Tangier saying that some war M,
sheaps ships In thn boy ot Tangier. Soma ;
Trubel has been between thn Bashaw ot Tan- j
glor and the tribes nere Tangier but that (
Trubel will soon be sateld O. K.
"Tho Frinch is not doing anything good ;
toards tho Moors and the Moor did not Ilk '
the Frinch people at all. Remember me to m
Mr. Edwin H. Low. ;
"The Sultan lost 20000 Dollar In the last )
Paris Exposition. 80 now ho is walking verrr '
careful nbout the Checaeo Fear, but he will '
give hands In the Fear anyhow. ;
" Thlsquite long letter please exouse mtstak
In writing. M
"Trusting this will And you in good Helth H
and Happy I Remain your Feathefuly. IMi
" Sie Hassan Ben Au Axmobibxt. !
"Ameer ot the Bultan.car British post office. "
Tangier. Morocco. Africa." Iml
BROXBBB aARDKRR'S ADVICE. l
The Jbtmeklla Club Regrets the Dou-tnr 1
ors Conpltuoui Mtabtr, ;.;
CnptrlgH. ISO. I j
It has been understood for some time past I
that Shindig Watklns ot the Limekiln Club
was going to remove to Columbus. 0., where I r
Inducements woro held out to htm to open a I 7.
stand for the sale of old-fashioned pumpkin I "
pies and fried cakos. At the last regular meet- I
ingot the club, attor the transaction of rou- "
tino business. Brother Gardner called Shindig;
to the front and said : ;
" Brudder "Watklns, I'ze bin told dat yo' talk i
o' lenbln us." :
"Yes, sail," ';
"Gwlnodownto Ohio to sot up inblznet
fur yo'solf ?" a'
" Yos. sah." 'J
" Wall, dls club will miss yo', an' each mem :
ber will be sorry to see yo' go. While yo' am 1
not a brilliant man, neither hev yo' spit on da ?
stove nor broken any lamp chimneys. As dls ,'
am do last moetln' bofo' yo'r departure. I wish 5'
to say a few fatherly words to yo'."
" Yos, sah."
"In do fust place, pay up all yo'r debt beta
yo' start. Had Cicoro left Rome owin fur I
house rent, groceries, bacon, an' so on, ha lf
could nobber hev achlovcd greatness. In da 13 j
nex' place, if yo' hev bin mad at anybody kas th
yo' could't agroo about de alge of Noah when l!';i
lie entered do ark, go to him and offer yo'r MZ
hand an make poaco." 1 1 i
" I has dun it sail." replied Shindig. f.
"Poan'godown to Ohio feelin' datyo'am jjt
doln' do stalt a great favor by oomln'. an jfe
doun' attempt to put on style ober de people S
yo' moet. If yo' had nebber bin bn'n Into dls 2
world do stalt of Ohio would hev got along jist I1
dnsame. Hlie wants yo'r nunkin pies anyor
fried cakes, but she wouldn't butt up if she fk
didn't git 'era. It will, of co'ee, he known dat Z
vo' nra a member of dis Limekiln Club, and i?
Aldermen, Judgos, an', ebon de Ouv'nor will fa
stop to shako hands wjd yo'. poan' let yo'self Vrfj
git swelled up wld pride. Be jest proud 'null
logo right on tendin' to bizness.butnot proud "
'nuffto bust to pieces llkeabller carryln' too .;,
much steam. . ,i
" Yes. sub," answered Shindig. l3
" Doun' Is nd in Columbus wld any pertlckler m
motto on yo'r banner. 'Excelsior' Is a worry Kt
gnod motto, but it seldom pans out anythln' '"2.
which de owner foels proud nt. Mottoes wur
all righttwo hundred rars ago, when land was vTT
cheap an yo' could wote a often as yo' wantod AT
to on 'leckshun day, but times hev changed. l&
In old times honesty was de best policy, but in
dese daysde man who buys a hoss am sun- ;'
posed to locate all de spavins fur hlssolf. W&.
Now, about yo'r flnanshul stundln'. nasyn' I'A
fiwlne to toll eberybody down dardatyo was
n do punkln pie an' fried cake blrness simply X,
to occupy yo'r thought whilo wultin to invest
$75,000 sumwbare?" ,. . . !
"No. sah." said Shindig. "I sban'tdun no ;
braggin"t nil." ,, , . . . m-i
"Dut's right Yo' needn't tell eberybody flat .&
yo' only had twenty- en .dollar? left after Mm
reachln' de town, nn' in'noodti t -jarryili I lean
dat It rankos yo' 11 red to cut o.l vo r cotrpons. Sfr
Take a sort o' middle nurse. Pay cash fur Wt
what yn' buy. nn' If do icport spreads around fMX
datyo'am a millionaire, iimi t a unit or deny
it , )'' will attend ciukIi. '( i" to I mjfr
" Ifl'iuli'iint mWookeii imi wus n Baptist fl
Dat rollgiin am nil right, hut iloan" he n a (VIZ
hurry-- Do ,Mitli-ll-t roligun am also all right IV
If deMethod W church down ilur has a steople
an a bell In It un do Baptist church has net-
ther. It would ho policy fur yo' to jine In v. Id de VZ
former. I Is sorry to say dat in desedegener- K?
ute day we ju lg" a man's rellKlon mo by de !
outside looks of do meotln house dan how he MVt
""is nVldu of.ii. l-at'a about all, Brudder S3
Watklns. an m .in fi ! assured dat In gwlne MWtZ
awiyfriiwdis club, of which yo? hev bin a Mta
raombor almost from de organization, yo" Mb
(save only fronds behind. We shall want to B
h'ar Irom yo often, and we shall hopo to hT M
yo'r tpeerit wld u at eberjr r Ur jl0, H
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