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atNtwaz.1 aHTDBPWXHw - V a -I J w- w THE, REGISTER. PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAY. ALLISON ft PEBKOJ8, Pcblurx-s. IOLA, ALLEN COUNTY, KANSAS. TEEMS-TWO DOLLAXS PKK YEAR. OFFICIAL PAPER OF COTJHTY. $nstess mrtrtonj. COUNTY OFFICERS. Hon. JBGoodim District Judge X F Acen, Probate Judge Wm Thrasher, County Treasurer II A Xeedham County Clerk G M Brown, Hegister of Deeds J-4I Richards, County Attorney t: M Simpson, Clerk District Court J E Bryan, Superintendent Public Schools J L Woodfa Sheriff Lvman Rhoedes, ...SurTejor D Hoirille, . -AWHowIand, J Commisatoaers Isaac Bonebrake, ) CITY OFFICERS. W C Jones LI. Lowe John l'axson,") H I SUuber, L Walter, CIMmpson, I Mayor .Police judge ..Councilmen LLKorthrup,..' Treasurer it w xaicoit , ...v..c. JJJWoolIomes JI"!?1 C D Briggs, Assistant Slarsnal CHURCHES. METHODIST EPISCOPAL. Corner of Jefferson avenue and Broadway St. Herrices even- Sablnth at 10H a. in- and 7 p.m. Prayer meetuig Thursday evenings at 7 p. m. II. K. Muni, Pastor. PRESBYTERIAN. Comer Madison avenue and Western street. Serice- lOJJa.m. and7n.ro. Sunday School at Sjja.m. J. w. l'lNKEirros, Pastor. BAPTIST. On Sycamore street. Hrrvices every Sabbath at IOKa. in. and? p. m. Prayer meeting on Thurs day evening. Church meeting at 2 p. m. on aturdar before the tint tablcOh in each month. Sabbatll bchool at 12 o'clock m. U. T. Floyd, Pastor. Swwt Societies. IOLA LODGE, NO. 38, M A. F. A. Masons meets on the first anil third Saturdavs In every niontn. Xrethrea in icood standing are Invited olaenti. ! aiaaiua?, - " J. N. Whitb, bec'y. IOLA LODGE, NO. 21, I. O. of Odd FeV lows hold their regular meetings every Tues 'day earning, in their - n . . .. . ..... an vt.l.i.... nail, nexi uoor nmn 01 ine ijoi omw. miiwb brethren In good standing, are invited to attend. JOHN EVEIUIEAKT, X. U. J. S. Ccmsiivgs Scc'y hotels. LELAND HOUSE. XT BANCROFT. Proprietor. IOLA, Kansas. r1 Thi. hnn. has lV-en thorouzhlv renaired and refitted and is now the moot desirable place in the city for travelers to stop. Xo wins will be spared to make the guests of the Lrland icel at home. Baggage transferred to and from Depot free or cnarge. ttorst H. W. TALCOTT, m w...-..- T kltr fnl Allan mlllllr. Jt Kansas. Office on Madison avenue, one door or the State will receive careful attention. All collections promptly remitted. NELSON F. AOERS, ATTORNEY AT LAW, Iola, Allen county, Kansas lias the only full and complete set uf Abstracts of Allen county. m J". C. SICXHAV J. II. KlCItAKIM, County Attorney. MURRAY & RICHARDS, . TTIIUN'KYSASD COCXSELORSATLAW. Money in Hims from S-VUU W to S.'S.OJO 00 loaned on long lime upon uuprotc. s am Allen, Anderson, Woodson, and Neosho coun ties. JQtscellaneous. M. DeMOSS, Mi D., Orr tiCtiicrpuu. niuat . iaw.v Residence on Wsshinfftun arenue, 2nd door RUUIII JCU3UU B(VCl H, A. NEEDHAM, COUNTY CLERK. Convej-andng ilorc, and acknowledsementstaki and pla is neatly drawn. carefully n. Maps D. F. GIVENS, -II TATCHMAKEU, JEWELER, AXD CLOCK W Repairer, ai the postofflce, Iola, Kansas. Clocks, Watches and Jewelry, promptly and jieatly repaired and warranted. A fine assort jnent of Clocks, Jewelry, Gold pens and other fancy articles, which will be sold iheap. DR. S. TOZER, TVENTAL SCRGEOX, is now prepared to I J itmt tnifcntitrv in all Its diflcrent forms. in the latet and roost oiuiroved style; the best of .material used, and general satisfaction guaran teed. Also a sure cure for SoreMouths. Charges as reasonable as elsewhere. Office oter John Francis' store. J. N. WHITE, TTXDERTAKER, Madison avenue, Iola, Kan- Hearse alwavs in readiness. Metali t 1 IMS. WOOUCOninS COnsianuv ou uauu iiu Metalic Burial Coses -fiirnialieil on Miort notice. S. & YOUNG, Wl kit r!TTV x-n SII.VERSMITII SUOP. Havuuc located in loU for the tmrpose of repainngGuns, Pistols, Clocks, watches ana aii kinds of Jewelry, I ask those who may have an v w i.MHMn.fn 04fm& maias t warrant ui -work to give satisfaction. A good assortment of notions tir sale. oiainsiiiMDcwu-"-r nu wuv. H.iusiber the nlace. first loor east orwlshington avenue on north side of Madison avenue. J. E. THORP, T innvn SUnP nn WAahinrlc ARBER SHOP on Washington avenue flrjt XJdoorsouthofL.L.Xorthrup's. Wjiod.Coal, ratnnrifeL,. aormruu-s. ngw,ui Com and Hickory Xute taken in ex Potatoes, Com i .change for work. TOTED. We will give energetic men and Women BUSINESS THAT WILL PAY .from l to ti ;rrlay, can be pursued in your own neighborhood, and is strictly honorable. CZ ;Birticairrfr, or .amples worth several Hollars Iip seatnf vmn-tnnr do von?" Ihatwm enable you to go to work at once. willrlue sea'I Joul l"se, ao you I Hie aent on receipt of fifty cents. Address. J. LATHAM, CO., . SW Washington St., Boston, Mass, ' GEO. A. BOWLUS, Real Estate Broker, Iola, Kansas. DOES A. GENERAL LAND AGENCY BUSINESS. Collects Rents, Pays Taxes, &c Office on Madison avenue, one door east Wm. 3avis. BSUBAKER & PURCELL, UYERY, mi FEE!, Sale Wat Sidt PuMic SfMrt, IOLA, - - KA1VSAS. Saddle Horses, Buggies and Carriages always jrsdy on juomvnt'e JioDcr, Charges reasonable. THE IOLA REGISTER VOLUME IZ. ANTIQUITIES. There U no song like an old song That we hrve not beard for years; Each simple note appears to throng With shapes that swim ia tears. It may have been a cheerful strain, But 'twas so long ago, That flee, grown old, has turned to pain, And mirth has turned to woe. Tbjue is no friend like an old friend. Whose life-path mates our own; Whose dawn and noon, whose eve and end. Have known what we hue known. It may be, when we read his face, We note a trace of care; Tin uell that friends in life's last grace Slure sighs as smiles they share. There Is no love like an old love, A lost, may be, or dead; Whose place siucc she his gone above, Xo other tills instead. It is not, we'll ne'er love anew, For lite were drear if so; But that first love had roots that grew Where others cannot grow. There are no days like the old days, " When we, not they, were young; When nil life's rajs were golden rays, And wrong had never stung. Dear Heart I If no w our steps could pass Through paths of childhood's morn, And the dew of youth lie on the grass Which Time's fell scythe has shorn! Old sos, old friend, old love, old days; Old things, ye never old; A strcaic that's dark till sunshine plays And changes it to gold: Through all winds memory's river on, JUH basks of sore regret; But a gleam's on the peaks of long-agone, That rcftens sadness yet. Toe Cant of Drink. The appetite for strong drink in rata bas spoiled the life of more women ru ined more hopes for them, scattered more fortunes for them, brought them to more sorrow, shame and hardship than any other evil that lives. The country numbers tens nay, hundreds of thousands who are widows to-dav. and sit in hopeless weeds, because their hus bands have been slain by strong drink. mere are hundreds of thousands of homes scattered over the land, in which women live lives of torture, goingthroueh all the changes of suffering that lie between the extremes of fear and despair because those whom they love love wine better than the woman they have worn to love. There are women by thousands who dread to hear the step that once thrilled them with pleasure, because that step has learned to real under the influ ence of the seductive poison. There are women groaning with pain while we write these woeQs, for bruises inflicted by husbands mad with drink. There can be no cxageration in any statement in regard to this matter, because no human's imagination can create anything worse than the truth. The sorrows and horrors f a wife with a drunken husband, or a mother with a drunken son, are as near the realization of hell as can be reached in this world at least. The shame, the indignation, the sorrow, and the sense of disgrace for herself and children, the poverty, and not unfrequently the beg garythe fear and the fact of violence, the lingering, life-long struggle and de spair of countless women, with drunken husbands, are enough to make all women curse wine, and engage unitedly to op pose it everywhere as the worst enemy of their sex. A denies! Difficulty. A lively exchange tells the following story: "One of our merchants recently sold a gross of matches to a woman, who, on reaching her home, could not make them turn. In a towering pio 1 which I increased all the way back, she r .'turned and demanded, 'why did you cheat me with those worthless matches?' 'Matches,' responded the grocer pleasantly he al ways wears a smile for his customers 'what is the trouble with the matches?" They won't burn, not one of them,' was the quick, angry response. 'Let us see,' said the gentleman, applying the charged end to his pantaloons and causing it to blaze instanter, 'that burns well enough.' 'But the rest won't' replied the woman, who began to fear that she had walked seven miles and was to return seven more on foot, and had got angry for nothing. The grocer opened three bunches and proved them all the same. 'I don't want to burn up all your matches,' he said, 'but there is not one that will not burn the same way.' Chagrined, she started at him with tiger eyes, and not to be beaten, burst out "if they will, you don't suppose every time I want a fire, I'm coming all this way to rub them on A Bachelor's Exploit Vltk a Baby. One of the best looking and most sought-after young business men in Uti ca, N. Y., says the Herald of the 30th, had his gallantry put to a severe test Friday. A charming married lady friend wagered $15 with hint that he dare not carry her baby through Genesee Street from Bajg's Hotel to Oneida Square. Whether the gentleman felt particularly brave and happy after his enjoyment of Thanksgiving festivities, or for some other reason, we know not, but certain it is that he accepted the challenge and carried the -baby, but such work as he made of it J The baby in question is the prettiest little seven-months mortal in Utica. Its father is one of the wittiest and finest-looking men in the county, but the baby gets its loveliest charms from its mother. The boy is the pride of Us parent's hearte,.aod ifkisses would stick, its lips would be covered with rock candy to the depth of six inches every day. .The young gentleman who was cha!!nged envies the father, mother and baby every day of his life. When he started out from Bagg's Hotel with the chirping cherub in his arms his face was rosy with blushes and radiant with hap piness. The mother and other friends to the child were to follow in a carriage to see that tke task was completed accord ing to the terms of the wager, and they did not lose sight of the toiler for a mo' ment. ., .ne outset the child weighed about twenty-five pounds. The suppos ed father and the elegantly dressed lady attracted general attention upon the business portion of Genesee Street. The gentleman's friends were not certain that they had heard ol his marriage, and he had been seen at the Opera-house frequently of late, end each time with a different charmer, but this must have been owing to the absence of his wife and the baby, probably. While conversation after this style was going on in the stores, the bachelor reached the City Hall, and at that particular moment he was ready to assert that the child weighed seventy-five pounds. From this point upward was the tug of war. The hour chosen was one in which he generally takes an airing, and all of his window friends expected to see him, but not with a baby. Then the baby com menced to get uneasy, and it was hard work to hold it out at arm's length and call it "Sweety," "Ducky," "Darling," eta, etc. Three or four merry maidens in an uptown residence rustled the cur tain in such a manner that the perspir ing toiler knew that he was seen ; but do well or do ill he was bound to win, xnd win he did. Those who witnessed the affair in all of its stages, say that it was difficult to tell at times whether the child was upright or revoked, perpendicular or horizontal, for the reason that its posi tion was changed so frequently. Its or dinary sweet voice u.is harsh and crisp before Cottage Street was reached, and but for the true grit which the gentle man possesses, and tin love he beares for the baby, it is believed that the baby would have been tossed into a conven ient fountain anything for a change. All the young ladies upon Genesee Street seemed to be standing in their windows as he passed. Opposite Eagle Street he met a particular lady friend in a car riage, and then the baby weighed a full ton. When the mother received her dar ling child from the hands of the brave one, cold and huge dropj of perspiration poured from every pore of his face; his necktie was gone and his collar unbut toned. The contents of the Philadelphia mint would not tempt him down the street with a similar accompaniment. The wager was paid, and the mother and her baby rode down town, while the brave bachelor wended his way back to his place of business through Park Av enue and other quiet streets, solitary, thoughtful and alone. The next tine he carries a baby through Genesee Street bis friends may be certain that it is his own, and that the other stock-holder in the cherub is within sight. The Saa of Trad ill's Life Theory. The Loudon Qlobe esvs: "Professor Tyndall's laborious address to the British Association may be readily summed up by the simple re-statement of a very old argument. An egg contains all the material necessary to form a chick. It holds also, for a time at least, the force requisite to construct the animal out of its component elements. The only thing needed is to set the formative process iu action by the application of another form of force or motion called heat. But this last must be supplied from without. The sum of Professor Tyc dall's researches is precisely analogous. He finds in matter 'the promise and potency of every form and qualify of life,' just as the naturalist and the or ganic chemist find the organic material of a chick, and the promise and potency to form one, within the egg-shell. But aeither the philosopher nor the experi mentalist can go one step beyond the facts. They are wholly unable to ex plain the something from without, in whose absence neither an egg full nor a world of life can be called into palpable existence. This is the point at which philosophy again arrives the old point at which it has been arriving by various paths ever since the first effort to pene trate an inscrutable mystery. The Egyptians symbolized the difficulty, and their inability to surmount it, by offering the mysterious egg reverently to their gods. They lay the unsolved problem of the finite at the feet of the Infinite. Professor Tyndall and the British Asso siatioa might learn wisdom, without humiliation, from the the ancient idola ters, and emulate their not ignoble submission." Rise with the lark. That is, daring cold weather, as soon as the lark rises, waken your wife and tell her that ir ; time to build tke fire. If she makes any objections yon can refer her to a dozen or more works on the beneft of early rising. Any Man who cares a cent for his wife's health will take pride in hear ing her a round the house at daylight of a winter morning getting up a red-hot stove and warming bii socks and boots. IOLA, ALLEN COUNTY, KANSAS, The Grasshopper is a Bordea. The grasshopper iz a flippant bug. Theyare born of eggs and are an inch and a quarter in length when they git ripe. They are hatched out, git their grotb, and di off in 75 days. This iz bizsiness and shows that they faav enterprise in a hi degree. What they are good for is a prize kon undrum,.but the evil they sometimed iz ekal to a famin. I hav seen a very green thing on the face of the earth for fifty miles in cir cumference et up bi them, and millions ov them besides starving to death. I hav seen the ar filled by them like a shower of sand, and nothing-but stone fenses proff against their destroying ap petights. ' y- They travil oa the jump and fiHjf o hevins with their song of ruin. They are a consuming fire and no power ov man cin stay their journey. One grasshopper iz a mizerable item, but when some edikt ov heavin marshals them in countless legions they are an appaling terror. To be et up by grasshoppers, to be konsumed by niusWiters, or mangled bi a mule, hav always been the three deaths that I hav dreded. But as much as I fear the deadly grasshopper, I had rather face a mile square of them, all alone, in the month of August ; I had rather cross the Newark marshes by moonlight, in July, when musketeers are in their consumate' glory or even fondle the sportive mule, than to have a nuzpaper krictet, who works for twelve dollars a week git after me. Oh 1 it iz awful to hav the laurels of years torn from one's forehead trad trampled in the dust, and be annihilated for life, and perhaps eturnity, by the scaving fury ov the nuzepaper krickit who works for 12 dollars a week and pays the highest cash price for his clam gruil. This iz purly awful. This beets mules, grasshoppers and musketeers just as easy as sticking a thistle in your finger. Josh Billings. The Katie Kia-Svviulle. The exposure of the wretched swindle so long maintained by Katie King knocks the bottom out from under that sham of the Spiritualists, "uuieriali.ut:jti of the spirit," and brings the whole shallow legerdemain of the mediums down with it. That such a sham could have been sustained so long, almost passes compre hension. It is not remarkable that ig norant and superstitious persons should be deceived by it, or that imaginative young people of immature judgment, and addicted to running after every new ism that turns up, should have accepted this female charlatan as a "m serialized spirit;" but it is remarkable that she should have deceived such men as Mr. Robert Dale Owen, and misled others laying claim to superior intelligence and scientific knowledge. Katie King, by her own confession, now appears to have been only a very shallow swindler, who practiced the panel-game upon her dupes, and found her reward in the valuable presents with which her admirers loaded her. Rings, lockets, crosses, diamonds, and toilet goods showered iu upon her daily, and at night she soared away with them into the seraphic regions of a Phil adelphia boarding-house, and smiled an gelically at the folly of her victims. This seraphic two-hundred-ycar-old maiden counted her dupes by thousands. They were not only the credulous vic tims who thronged her seances from all parts of the country and witnessed her antics with wide-open mouths and eyes, talked angelic bosh to her, and emptied their pockets and pocket-books into her spiritual lap, but there were thousands of others who had never seen her oiu men and women grown fond and foolish, and young men and women of airy fan cies and morbid musings who were daz ed with Katie King. Chicago Tribune. The following on the editorial fraterni ty is from the January Qalaxy. It is too good to lose: "An ditor remarks how a colored barber made a dead-head of him. He offered the usual dime for shaving, when the fellow drew himself up with consid erable pomposity and said : 'I understand dat you is an editor.' Well, what of it V says we. 'We neber charge editors nuffin.' But my worthy friend,' we continued, there are a good many editors traveling nowadays; and such liberality on your part will prove a ruinous business.' 'Oh I neber mind,' remarked the barber 'we make it up off the gemmen.' " Massachusetts treats poor people to free rides on her railroads. .vtne of the Connecticut people are complaining bit terly again of the way paupers are im posed upon the towns of the State, through the law of Massachusetts, by which poor persons receive passes over the railroads. They are carried as far as the State line, where their fare is de manded, and if they don't pay they are put off the train, and of course become a charge to the town where they happen to be left. The youth who cried "Excelsior," didn't know that he was naming. five oat of every six saloons in the country. JANUARY 9, 1875. Preseaee of Mill. Prof. Wilder gives these short rules for action in case of accident : For dnst in the eye, avoid rubbing, dash water into them; remove cinders, eta, with the round point of a lead pencil. Re move insects from the ear by tepid water; never put a hard instrument into the ear. If an artery is cut, compress above the wound ; if a vein is cut, compress be low. If choked, get upon all fours, and cough. For light burns, dip the part in cold water; if the skin is destroyed, cov er with varnish. Smother a firo with carpets, etc; water will often spread burning oil, and increase the danger. Before passing through smoke, take a full breath, and then stoop low, but if carbon is suspected, then walk erect. Suck poison wounds, unless your mouth is sore. Enlarge the wound, or, better, cot out the part without delay. Hold the wounded part as long as can be borne to a hot coal, or end of a cigar. In case of poisoning, excite vomiting by tickling the throat, or by water or mustard. For acid poisons, give aeids; in case of opium poisoning, give strong coffee and keep moving. If in water, float on the back, with the nose and mouth projecting. For appoplexy, raise the head and body; for fainting, lay the person flat. The New British Polar Expedition- This expedition, which will consist of two steam whale-ships and about 120 men and officers, will leave this country next summer, and proceed through Da vis' Straights, up Baffin's Bay to the Danish-settlements of Disco and Upcr- navik. These will be its base. Then, still heading northward, the volunteers will enter Smith's Sound, and one will be left as an intermediate depot in 81 degrees north latitude, in a fixed posi tion, while the second will press on into the open s:a which, it is believed, exists about the Pole. The depot ship will be about 546 miles from the Pole, and xhe retreat upon it in case of disaster will not be difficult to men with sledges. The expedition will have orders in any case to return in the autumn of 1877; and a steamer will probably be sent to the depot-ship in the summer of 1876 to bring back news of the condition1 of the expedition and the details of such infor mation as may have been obtained. The report that Commander Markham has been selected to command the expedi tion is premature. The admiralty are divided between the appointment of a yonng, comparatively inexperienced of ficer, and a senior officer of experience, but with weight of years. The cost of the expedition is estimated at 30,000 a year. London paper. The Romance of a Pretty Typesetter A recent number of a Portland (Ore gon) paper tells a pleasant little rtory to tha following effect : A young lady well known in that city has just started to join her parents, whom she has no rec ollection of ever having seen. Her name is Emma Franklc, and her parents live in Florence, Italy. At the age of between three and four years she was given to a family named Stokes, who promised to educate and otherwise pro ide for her. It seems that she was trained for circus performances, and traveled with circus troupes until she was eighteen years old, when she aban doned the business made her home in Portland, and, having learned to set type, supported herself by that work during the past four years, taking good care of herself and winning many friends. Meanwhile she had caused inquiries for her parents to be made in Florence, these only recently proving successful, the parents having also been for some years advertising for their lost daughter. Money was sent to the daughter from Florence with which to defray her ex penses home, and by this time she has probably been re-united to those who long ago parted from her, hoping it would prove to her advantage. SomnambalUtie- A few evenings ago Miss Bishop, a do mestic employed in the family of Mr. Erastus E. Jones, Syracuse Avenue, Oswego, N. Y., sat talking with some of her friends till rather a late hour, about the cheerful and animated subject of burglars and burglaries. Various stories of daring exploits in that line were rela ted, including instances of murder per petrated by desperate burglars when at bay. The girl went to bed rather later than usual, and with her mind unpleasantly impressed by the evening's conversation. At a late hour, afterwards tound to be half-past 3, she heard a revolver dis charged in the house, followed by five loud and distinct shouts in rather rapid succession, during which time she be came greatly" terrified. At the sixth shot she sprang from her bed, rushed to the window, raised it, threw wide the blinds, leaped to the ground, a distance of fifteen feet, and ran across the road to a neighbor's. - . The master of the houe was aroused by a vigorous rattling at the door, and finally got up and opened it. He was dumbfounded to sec this girl, whom he knew, standing at the door, clad only in her night dress, and trembling with fear and agitation. He aked what was the N0.2. matter, and she told him in a wild and frantic way what she heard. He took the girl into the house, dressed himself and went down the street ior a police man, but not finding one quickly, he returned, and seeing a light in Mr. Jones' house, went over there. He found the family up and agiuted, and told them he had been down for a police man, mey did not understand him, and he explained what had happened. Mr. Jones' folks then said they heard no shots fired, but did hear the blinds of the girl's room open and afterwards felt the wind rushing into the house; and that they went to her room, found her gone, and were much alarmed abonther. The mystified neighbor went hsme and found the girl sleeping soundlv. About 5 o'clock she awoke, and was greatly sur prised and mortined to fiud Lerself in a neighbor's hoasa Explanations followed but she recollected nothing of healing the shots, nor of jumping from lhe win dow, or in fact anything that she had re lated as having transpired. Then it was seen that the girl had been s. wping all the while; and during her slumber had been a victim of the impression made by the evening talk in fact had performed one of the most dangerous and wonder ful somnambulistic feats anywhere re-' corded. Strange to say she was not hurt by the leap from the window, and bus experi enced no unpleasant results from her amazing and dangerous exploits. The Petroleum Business. The petroleum business is just at present prostated by the over-production of the -ells. Crude petroleum is worth only forty cents per barrel ia the oil region, and hence the smaller wells do not pay their expenses. The owner of a well flowing three or four hundred bar rels daily can make money with oil at the lowest prices, but a five or six barrel well is unprofitable unless oil brings fully three dollars per barrel. It is this feature of the business which makes it and must continue to make itesseatially a form of gambling. It was thought that, when once the mania for specula' tion in petroleum stocks should irae to an end, tne production of petroleum would become a safe and trustworthy business, it is, nowever, as mucn a gambling business to-day as it ever was. There can be no dependence placed in a business in which one man can profita bly sell for forty cents a barrel the same article that another producer miut obtain three dollars for or sell at a loss. Steady returns and moderate profits are not looked for by petroleum rataers, Every man expects to strike a hundred barrel well, knowing that if he does so he will make money whatever may be the price of oil. The difference between buying a ticket in a lottery and boring a well on Oil Creek is hardly to bo appre ciated, and the number of blanks in the lattter business is so great that it is probable that more money has been sunk in petroleum mining than bas yet been received from the sale of oil. Exhange. Ueautiful Sentiments. Bulwer eloquently says : It cannot be that earth is man's only abiding place It cannot be that our life is only a bub ble cast up by the great ocean of eternity to float fora moment and then rink into nothingness. Else why is it that the glorious aspirations which leap like an gels from the temples of our hearts are forever wandering about unsatisfied? why is it that the rainbow and the clouds come over us with beauty that is not ou earth, and then pass away, leaving us to muse upon their mysterious loveli ness! tvny is it inc stars wnicn noia their festival around the midnight throne are set so high above our limited faculties forever mocking us with their unap proachable glory ? Why is it that bright forms of human beauty are presented to our view and then taken from us, leaving the thousand streams of onr affection to flow back in Alpine torrents upon the heart ? We are born of a higher destiny than that of earth. There is a realm where the rainbow never fades; where the stars will be spread before us like islands that slumber on the oceun, and where the beings who now pass before us like shadows, will stay forever ia our presence." Dissoratioa of Partaersaip. Among the Burmese the marriage knot is very easily undone. If two persons are tired of each others society, they dis solve partnership in the following simple and touching manner: They respect ively light two candles, and shutting np their hut, sit down and wait until they are burned. The one whose candle burns out first gets up at once and leaves the house forever, taking nothing bnt the clothes he or she may have on at the time; all else then becomes the property of the other party. John Bull isso jealous of our reception of the King of Hawaii, that the Saltan of Zanzibar is to be cleaned up and clothed for a visit to England. A young vocalist, failing to execute the trills of his part efleetively, apolo gized to the audience sayiag .that he trembled so that he could sot shake. RATES OF ADVERTISING. STACK... linen... Xincn... Jioeh... slnch... XOol... KCol... 1 Col... I l w.lt w.r m m.W m. I TS. aim si sons oo w ISO tiooa ISO too SS0 3 80 ia im a 3 0o 5 W T 4001 S30 10 looo iso S SOtS 00 MM 5 ad 8 ae ii oetis ma ooi ss oo 17 SS solo scu oo it 10 BU8 0e( a OOfiT 00 00B 00 ooiasooi oooo 100 I . H"Transient and Legal advertisement most be paid for in adrancc. Local and Special Notices, 10 cents a line.' AD letter ia relation to business la any way connected with the otsce should be addntd to the Publishers and Proprietors. Aixuon A mom. Alanfcal rUeRepahlie. Among the Americans who attend a ball given at the Hotel de Ville, Paris when John Y. Mason was our Minuter there, was Jack Spicer, -of Kentucey. Jack rushed the dress somewhat strong, and sported epauletts on his shoulders large enough to start four Major Generals in business. Jack was the observed of all observers, and got mixed np with a party that his friends could not account for. Wherever the Marshals of France went there went Jack and when the Marshals sat down, Jack did the same, always taking the post of honor. The day after the ball Jack called on our Minister to France, who started up a conversation in the following way : "I hear, Jack, you were at the ball last evening." "I was sir, and had a gay old time." "Fjcy which-yoji were indebted, I sup- -pose, to the high old company you got mixed up with. B the way how came you associated with the Marshals?" "How ? By virtue of my office. They were Marshals of France, while I am nothing else than a Marshal of the Re public. I showed my position, and took post accordingly." "By right of your office I what do yon mean ?" "Read-and see!" Here Jack presented Mr. Mason with a whitey-brown paper, with a seal big enough for a 4-pound weight. "What in the name of heaven la this?" "My commission of 'Marshal,' I re ceived ia 1850, when I assisted in taking the census in Frankfort. "You don't mean to say that yon travel on this?" "I don't mean anything else. That makes me a 'Marshal' of the Republic. and I iated to have the office duly hon ored." Mr. Mason allowed that Jack was do ing a very large business on a very small capital. Cincinnati Star. Willis; ts OMige. A very prepossessing young lady, can vassing for a popular book, stepped into the office of real estate broker n Spring field, Mass., the other morning, and finding the broker apparently at leasers asked him to look at her book. Tha gentleman politely informed her that.it would only be a waste of time, as he could not purchase it. "Oh, nevermind that," ejaculated the young woman ; ."it won't cost you anything to look at it even if you(don'tbuy. "I should like to have you read some portions of it and see what it .is." The accommodating broker, taking the volume and glancing at the title page commenced a perusal of the introduction. .This finished he began at the first chapter and read carefully and leisurely along. It was about 9 o'clook when he commenced, and an hour passed silently away. Then the book agent 'began to exibit signs of nervousness, which were apparently unnoticed by the broker, for be sever raised his eyes from the volume, bat read steadily on. Eleven o'clock came and the lady began to walk rather smartly about the room, glancing occa sionally out of the windows. At noon the broker was still reading and the agent wore a decidedly troubled countesaner A few minutes before 1 o'clock tha broker laid the book down, leisurely donned bis overcoat and hat, .and .re marked blandly : "That is a -very good book. I am sorry that I cannt read more of it, bnt I am obliged to go to dinner. If you will call in the afternoon, I will read some more of it." Many curious stories are told of the strange work types will make with what a man says or writes. Dr. Bethune once introduced into a sermon the sentence, "While men slept the devil totted tare." Judge of his surprise when he found himself reported in a religious journal as saying, "the devil $atced trctt" An editor wrote of the burial of a young man, "Disconsolate friends stood riveted to the spot i' but his own compositors made him say "Disconsolate Jlendt stood riveted to the tport." In the manuscript of his Still Hour, Professor Phelps wrote, "A dead calm at sea," but in the book it reads, "A dead-c&an at sea." William Jay, of Bath, once preached a sermon from the text, "All that a Mas hats will he give for his life." It was printed, and whea the proof-sheets come to him for correction, he foand the text reading, "All that a man hath will he give for his wife." Instead of correcting the error in the usual way, he wrote oa the margin, "That depends oa circmutancea." Moltke does not like "improvised armies ;" that is to say, he doe not lika an armed people, and so professional soldier ever did. Here are his viawa, which he presents with a humaiiaa as pect: "It is bad enough wm armiM must laeerate one another, bat sot tae people se set against one another, that k so progress ofcivilizatios, bat a re-returs to barbarism. A regslar war k like thunderstorm, whie ia great blows de vastates tracts of land, bnt also fartiliaea. A atracrfe, however, such aa goes oa ow ia Spain, k like s lasting thick fefc. hich destroys entire harvests. Isipro- vised armies can, aewever, sot carry q& any other fcttM T struggle. oe ao osjaso alls oo 12 m -, r .-f A?i& s ! p. ,. J5, ?.&&.