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flatter . SDrlnrts Howa CBIS. L. SMITH, Editor ft Owaer. BAXTER 8F3UNQ3 KANSU The aeroplane Is still amenable to the law of gravity. We are threatened with monoplane whlakera and balloon skirts. There are all kinds of suckers, In cluding the one who puts up the side bet Listen to he candldatesl Yet women bare been called the talkative sex. Let us be calm. That moth ball odor will soon pass from Ingenuous humanity. The dreaded open season for stories about finding pearls In oyster stews Is now upon is. Two-story trolley cars are now pop ular In New York. Watch for the skyscrapers next Thus far no combination of capital has sought an injunction to restrain the union suit One of the grave Issues of the day Is the harrowing doubt: "Is King George henpecked?" Just plain, ordinary curiosity to see a candidate is often mistaken for wild enthusiasm for his cause. Chicago is to have an aeroplane steeplechase. Just as if ordinary fly lng weren't dangerous enough. Australia dreams of being a second Europe some time. Aud thus capture the American tourist business? Sapient observers declare that mountain climbing is dangerous exer cise. It' is also mighty hard work. A New York policeman was dis charged for being "too easy." Is he going to be the goat, we wonder? How sad she will be this winter, It eke doesn't have an evening . gown with a rim of fur around the bottom! Boston's mayor is going to keep chickens. And light here is where he will Iobo the suburban gardener vote. A Canadian preacher says his parish Is better than heaven. He missed his calling. He should have been a press agent An English actor laced himself so tight in a corset that he died. He was bound to keep in form, no matter what the cost v A man in Ohio went Insane after persistently reading the congressional tecord. But bis mind never was over ly strong. Another crying need is a? carnation which will sprout a pin with which it may be attached to the lapel of a man's coat - If the oyBter is a Buffering creature It gives human beings one good ex ample at least It keeps quiet about its wrongs. - . A London couple have married after a twenty- year courtship. ' At least they should becertain that their love Is steadfast Some $12 a week clerks spend '.all their spare time arguing about the re spective merits of the latest models in motor cars. Fall fashions are being displayed at fall openings. All-the-year-around husbands look alarmed, as usual, on such occasions. That proposed ban on the use of aeroplanes in war should be enlarged to Include the use of tboBe machines In circus stunts. . . - -' The sending up of two lieutenants with every aeroplane in the . British aviation corps seems, a lamentable waste of material. "- " TVia ttna-llah aristocracy has taken op bicycling again. The English aris tocracy never was noted lor its abil ity to buy gasoline. . Any good dog doctor can give yon a remedy for. the mangeao do sot throw away your foxxy hat until you have tried something. Ex-King Manuel of Portugal has five princesses to pick a wife from. Con gratulations of .the judicious will go to the four lucky ones. . i : Woman should not grow Indignant because men criticise the hobble skirt If It were not that It would be some- thtns else. Fussing about women's clothes is a constitutional require ment In the mascine cosmos. . TWENTIETH CENTURY i 1 o 'i-Xf V THIS is the new motorcycle collecting aevice dw ucwi Washington by the poBtofflce authorises. The photograph Bhows how the mail is taken from the letter box "without the conector leaving his . .a . . machine, proving a great time saver over FIND QUEER HOARD Interesting Discovery in an Old Texas House. Dagger, Crimson With Blood Rust of Centuries, and Ancient Spanlen Pieces of Eight Found In Old Pot San Antonio, Texas. Still crimson with the Dlood rust of centuries, a riArcer was found in the walla of an adobe building in San Antonio, and in another part of the house was iounu a copper pot containing . pieces of eight It is regarded as the most historical production wnicn Texas na. yielded In many years and the coins have been sent to Tiffany in New York for valuation. Charles Arnaud and Gus Loeloff, his brother-in-law, were tearing down an ancient structure, used in bygone aays as a fandango hall, when tbelr picks came In contact with sometning mai rang differently from the flint rock rtilh mmnniAll nart of the Walls. They took their pocket knives and scraped away the mortar ana aiscov ered what resembled a teapot. Extracting this .vessel from Its coat ing, they dug a flint rock from its opening, where the lid should have been. At first spider webs obscured their view, but after wiping these away they could see dimly that there was something at the bottom of the pot It proved to be eight Spanish coins, covered with dust How the dust got there it Is Impossible to say, as the large opening of the teapot was closed and the spout ; was so small that only a few drops at a time could have been poured from it And In ad dition the hole was inclosed in the solid wall' Local scientists will tackle the prob lem of how the spiders entered the pot whether they were in it before the wall was closed, or whether they crept through some infinitesimal crack IS LITTLEST BABY OF ALL! Champion Lightweight Babe of Medi cal History le Born In Xew York. New York. The champion light weight baby of the entire history of medical practice, according to New Yaik physicians. Is being carefully guarded in an incubator at the Lying ln hospital. Second avenue and Sev enteenth street, for fear the, faint spark of life It possesses may expire at any moment Nevertheless, Its chance for existence seems favorable. It weighs only twenty ounces. It owes its present nold on Ufa to Dr. Charles H. Goldsmith of 1910 Lexington avenue, who, first bellev ing the little girl born prematurely, had come Into the world dead, later noticed a slight, twitch of one of the eyelids. He then revived the infant by breathing into its mouth. Mrs. Mary O'Connor of 259S Eighth avenue 1s the mother or the child, and at the time of Its birth was suffering with . hooping cough. : ift.r Dr. Goldsmith had been bur- rifcdly jnaimoned to t)je O'Connor MAIL" COLIECTLQ ft 1 bit .V! v . " T ' , "V"' vv"lJ: J-U''UT-.:.. , j ' " '- 0 at eKMir. ua ma aaaa M LkUa) IaI Aiit Ifl we oia way w and thence Into the spout of the pot Qulen sabe? The dagger has a pearl handle, carved by hand, carrying a feathery design on one side and on the otner nhiftld and laaves. At one end it has a guard almost as large as those of. the swords used by the crusaders, bearing a bas relief of a wolfs head. At tha other end it has a similar orna ment the head of some animal which has not yet been identified. The blade is seven Inches long, sham on one side and thick on the other. Its point in yet in fine shape and could do deadly work. It has pe culiar red stains, believed to have been caused by blood. This weapon was found near the top of the wall, hidden by mortar, and it is thought It was tossed there for the purpose of concealment MULES DEVASTATE ARMY POSli Eat All the Flowers In Garden and Kick Down Fences at 8an Francisco. San Francisco. One hundred and thirty-eight head of "MUsourl's finest just detrained upon tneir arrival rrom St Louis, for use at the Presidio, the local United States army poBt, broke from their corral, devastated flower gardens, struck panic to the hearts of civilians and pilce, who attempted to round them up, and otherwise en joyed the freedom of the city for near ly twenty-four hours, r A detachment of cavalry finally rounded up 137 bf the mules, but one is still missing, along witn several hundred dollars' worth of flowers, veg etables and garden fences. Lightweight Triplets. New York. Triplets whose aggre gate weight Is less than, six pounds, have been born to Mrs. Dorothy Mosch, of this city. home he toULthe parents, after care ful MBminfitlon. that the baby was dead. The physician was astonished at the diminutive size oi tne lnont An eleht-Dourtd baby Is not consid ered a large one, yet this ,HtUe new comer was only rne-rixth tne weigui of an eight-pound eaby. As It lay on soft material arranged on a table, the father, hearing , the doctor's verdict started out to find an undertaker. A few minutes afterwards the physician noticed a slight move ment of an eyelid. The father return ed a few minutes later, having ar ranged for the burial. -to find the physician working to revive the child; though the appliances usually used in such cases were lacking and there was no time to send Tor them. " . MUCH SPEEDIER THAN CABLE Young Frenchman Invents System of Wireless ThaUYlll Revolution Ize Present Methods. - Paris. Julian Bethenod, a young French scientist, employed by the gov ernment at the Eiffel toFff post, baa Linear Measurements, Not Pounds, Count at Finish. Winner, Five Feet Ten Inches In Height Consumes Six Feet Ten Inches of 8moklng Fish All the Waistlines Alike.' - New York. Pie eating matches are more or leu familiar. Eel eating eon- tests are much less so, for the simple reason that' while commonly the pie eating is done in public and for a wager the eel eating is privately oone and for fun, though the loser may be required to pay for all the eels eaten. There is a little club composed of half a dozen substantial men, all lov ers of sea food, that owns a comfort able bungalow in a pleasant spot on the Long Island shore. In which Its members meet occasionally to eat a sea food dinner. They do their own cooking and they are all good cooks, with one or another of them notably able In some specialty. One is partic ularly good on chowder, others on fish and still others on eels. This club assembled in the -bungalow lately for an eel dinner and incidentally for an eel eating contest Amona fishermen acaualnted with the eel in every asoect and among eel lovers generally he is considered as a Qualified eel eater. who can eat Ids own length in eels. But of course no man could eat his own length of big eelsr the eels for such a test must not be more than half an inch In di ameter, which is the standard slse for eels to be eaten in eel eating con tests. Such is also the else eel that eel lovers find most agreeable to the taste. For this particular occasion the club commissioned an tel fisherman to rather eels In sufficient quantity and also those that should fill the require ments, being not more than hair an inch in diameter and of uniform slse. It took the fisherman three days to do this, 'though of course in that time he gathered also many larger eels which he could market The eels for the club he selected by sifting his catch through a sieve with a half-inch mesh. Tha club's cooking equipment in cludes two big frying pans IS Inches in diameter. Two members sat down before tha fire with these big frying pans and fried eels, which were kepi hot in an over, and when the eels warn ll ready the club began to eat In pie eating and some other similar contests there is usually set a ume limit tha winner being the man who eats the greatest number of pies in given time; but there is no ume limit here. The members eat leisure ly, for enjoyment, and then when all have finished the measurer measures un tha hones which each man has preserved by himself at the table. One lot after another eacn mans ei hnnAB ara stretched out on the table. with the sections set end to end and snugly together, and then the meas ure of the string Is taken. nn this occasion all the men had eaten mora than their length of eels with one exception. This member, who stands five feet ten inches in height had- eaten of eels but five feet nine. Probably he could easily have eaten a section or two more and n have exceeded the recognised tandard limit if he bad only taken tha tmuhla to keen a little closer mental note of his stacked up bones. But there were other members who had exceeded the standard by consia erable, includingjme man of the same heirht as the loser, namely, five feet ten, who had eaten six feet ten inches of eels, or one foot more than nis own length. This probably constitutes the eel eating record. Transparent hoBlery hain't doln' much f boom th' straight an' nar row path. invented a new system of wireless telegraphy which. It is predicted, will revolutionise existing metnoas. It is reported that he has found a w to disnense with the spark, thus simplifying - wireless telegraphy .so that instead of using, as at present, an ,1'nmitnr. transformer, self-induction Tsrtii condenser, -oscillator and anten nae, only the first and last or tnese are necessary. ;; This spew machine eliminates In terference, it is claimed, and trans mits and receives much faster than the present submarine cables, having capacity of 200 woras a minute. Hurlad Into Wolves' Cave. v Ifeeker. Colo. Julius L. .Boberts. Rio Blanco correspondent for the As sociated Press and several . Denver newspapers.' was badly bruised when i,H.i.fmm his horse Into an aban doned wolves' cave near here, Roh .rt. wa crossing a fissured gulch when the horse's feet slipped. Be was tnuited down a steep declivity ana saved himself by grasping -a shelf reck about sU ftfl below tt Vtf HARD FOR THE: HOUSEWIFE r Tt'a harA annnrh tn Irnpn hnillA If In turfAt hanlth hnt a woman who Is weak, tired and suffering all at the time witn an acning deck nas a heavy burden to carry. Any woman in this condition has good cause to suspect kidney trouble, especially if the kidney action seems aisoroerea m 11 TVtan'a K1AnV PUIS hSVO cured thousands of women Buffering in this way. It is tne oesi-recom- mended special kidney remeay. AN INDIANA CASE. Ml. MBIT - fldurfctn, Booth rankllnStrpat, rndlrlon.lnd MTU "1 twle !xiq Kldnf III. iTixl mr Ife. Iwalnf on? with irml nd w ood- &nr4 to bd. I Beam o baa to 11 through tha niaht. Oh a 1 od jkma'i Kidntr I'llli and la a abort time the? eurrd mii.l bar torn of kldnay tiohbla daring th paalvyaais." Get Dota l at any Drug Store, 50c. a Dox D-a'o Kidney oan s puis FOSTER-MILBUItN' CO.. Buffalo. N.T. SOMETHING AKIN TO GENIUS Young Man With Financial Ability 8o Well Developed Should Make i . Mark in World. - "Do you thing there Is any such thing as financial genius?" "I am sure there is. I know a young man who has it In a marked degree. After he had persuaded a beautiful daughter of one or our most promi nent jewelers to become his wife he went around and Induced the old man , to let him have an engagement ring at the coat price," 'I don t see any indication oi re markable financial genius about that" Wait When he and the girl broke their engagement he took the ring back to her dad and got him to pay eight per cent, interest on the money that had been invested. Optimists. For non-committal brevity of speech. (nmmnnd 111 tolhe Yankee lord of the soil. One euch, who was obligedto . . . i t j make a phyBician aajiy visus, uau so unvarying answer to the question, Uw An vnn foal todflV?" "Well." he would reply, showing as little in terest in the subject as possible, "I ain't no wuss." Further than that he wished to say nothing, and It took the cunning of a serpent to discover his real feelings. A man who was knocked down in the Btroet by a snow slide was asBalled by a sympathizing crowd with condolence and question. "Did it hurt youT ' inquired one or. Ma rpanuAra as he brushed the snow from the clothes of the well-powdered victim, "well," was the cautious an swer. "It ain't done me no good." Argonaut For the 8ake of Variety. Customer This, I suppose, is a fold ing bed. Merchant No, sir; we call tms an unfolding bed. I'll-show you. (Un folds it.) Tha mora lustlce some people get the leBS they are- inclined to boast of It A Million Persons Breakfast je very morn ing: on POSt ; Toasties Suppose you try the food with cream and sugar, as part of break fast or supper. - ' . - ; You may be sure It wDl.be a delicious part. "The Memory Linstr" POatam Oerl Oot7i ! aul Oraak, Mich. - Wit Blor. f I v ! 2