The Minneapolis journal. [volume], February 15, 1906, Page 16, Image 16

About The Minneapolis journal. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn.) 1888-1939

Image provided by: Minnesota Historical Society; Saint Paul, MN

                
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FRESH
THEY
Wifc A f/te Long ou
pass on his stock.
-"By9 aatan's walks, shoot lolly it flits."
Man with a Pass on the Grocery Store Who Had a Valuable
AssetAn Incident Showing How a Legislator's Feelings
Are Affected by "Favors" from a Corporation.
ENATOR LA FOLLETTE has introduced a bill to prohibit
the use of passes. The passes referred to are of the
kind by which you get a free ride on the railroad.
But did you ever hear of the man who had a pass on the
grocery store? He was a poor man, but had saved the pro-
prietor's daughter from what is poetically called a watery
giave," which is nothing but the river, and the grocer had
given him a free pass on his store (not transferable). Some
men try to work the pass system on the grocery by never
paying their bills, but the case referred to here was a genuine
pass.
When the coal jnan 's horse ran away, as luck would have
it, this same man stopped the "infuriated beast" (P. S., the
horse), and saved the fuel man's wife and daughter from a
-violent death The fuel man wrote out a pass on his coal
sheds and handed it over.
The man also had a bit of luck at the clothing store. The
place caught fire the day after the insurance ran out and
the man with the passes put it out with a well-directed effort
that surprised veteran firemen. The clothing man added a
The result was that this man didn't have to do anything
but pay taxes, and it is reported now that he is running for
some county office by which he intends to shut off this drain.
Think of the tremendous pull the grocer would have on
the man who had a pass on his store! Why, that man would
do almost anything for the grocer so as to keep him feeling
good. So the legislator who draws his transportation out
of the railroad without money and without price naturally
feels that turn about is fair play. He will do things which
he wouldn't otherwise do for a man who drags him across
the country where the walking is not only bad but tedious.
Passes, as a rule, are a sign that something is wrong.
The banana is an unsatisfactory fruit, but mother some
times corrects the banana's error thus. She takes the fruit,
cuts it lengthwise, spreads each strip with orange marmalade
and covers it above and below, sandwich-fashion, with a thin
strip of sponge cake. This sandwich is laid on a glass plate
and coveied with whipped cream into which a few chopped
almonds have been quietly mixed.
A strong man seated in front of this confection has been
known to weep tears of gratitude and deep emotion.
Speaking of eating, did you ever try the dentist's friend,
oat grits? Take a pint of crushed oats, sprinkle-in a little
black oak sawdust to give flavor, add one-half pint of strong
city water and bring to a boil, stirring constantly and adding
slowly three spoonfuls of coarse building sand for consistency.
Sprinkle with a little building plaster and serve with cream
and small dessert spoon.
Berlin, Germ., boasts an automatic restaurant that elim
inates the waiter who carefully puts one questionable thumb
into the soup as he brings it, and sizes you up for an extra
quarter for his share. In this model restaurant cabinets .with
glass fronts line the walls, and thru these glass fronts are
to be seen rows and rows of little elevators, with the slots
and mechanism for working them. Shelves, all around, on
little elevators, bring up hot soups, hot roasts, cold meats/
pies, sandwiches, tea, coffeein fact, whatever is on the
menu. All the customer has to do is to decide what he
wants, drop his coin in the proper opening, and await results.
In less than a minute up comes his meal, raised by electricity
from the kitchen in the basement.
Everybody has been sorry to hear that "Central" was
to be displaced by an automatic lady, but we can all spare
the waiter's thumb. A. J. R.
What the Market Affords
salmon, 20 cents a pound.
Shrimps, 40 cents a quart.
Spanish mackerel, 20 cents a rJound.
Eels, 20 cents a pound.
Lake Superior trout, 15 cents a pound.
Pike, 15 cents a pound.
Shallots, 10 cents a bunch.
Parsley, 5 cents a bunch.
Turnips, 15 cents a peck.
Cream puffs, 25 cents a dozen.
Boiled salmon with shrimp sauce is an appetizing dish,
To preserve the fine color of salmon it is usual to put it with
boiling water instead of cold. Scale, wash it carefully and
cleanse all the blood from the inside stir into the fish kettle
eight ounces of salt to a gallon of water, let it boil qaickly
for a minute or two, remove the scum, put in the salmon
and boil it moderately fast if it be small, but more gently
if it is thick, and be sure it is sufficiently done before send
ing to the table. From two to three pounds of the thick part
of a salmon will require half an hour to boil, but eight to
ten pounds will be done in little more than double that time,
less in proportion to its weight should be allowed for a small
fish. Do not allow it to remain in the water after it is ready
to serve, else the appearance and flavor will suffer.
Shell quickly half a pint of shrimps and mix with a
quarter of a pint of melted butter, to which add a few drops
of essence of anchovies and a little mace and a dash of
cayenne pepper. As soon as the shrimps are heated thru
dish and serve the sauce, which ought not to boil after they
are put in. Add two spoonfuls of cream just before serving.
A FAIR EXCHANGE.
ON. JOSEPH H. CHOATE tells of a meeting at a London
club of a bishop and Lord Rosebery. During the course
of their conversation the reverend gentleman observed to his
lordship:
"I'%e an invitation to dine this evening. What a nuisance
it isa long dinner, I mean. There are two things I abso
lutely dreada long dinner and a long sermon. I contend
that, however good they may be, neither the dinner nor the
sermon should take more than 20 minutes at the most."
Rosebery smiled. "It seems to me," he said, "that the
matter might be nicely arranged by knocking ten minutes off
the sermon and putting it on the dinner."Harper's Weekly.
UP IN A BALLOON.
were talking of those marvelous aeronauts, the
Wright brothers of Dayton.
"Ever been up in a balloon?" said the fat reporter.
They shook their heads.
"Well," said the reporter, "the funniest part of a bal-
loon ascension is that you seem to take the horizon up with
"You float softly skyward, and the earth changes to a
cup, the horizon being the cup's rim. Up, up you skim, but
the horizon rises with you. No matter how high jou go
8,000 feet, 15,000 feetthe horizon, an immense, steel-blue
ring, remains level with your eyes*"
.'ifc. _ Thursda Evening THE MINNEAPOLIS JODRN
ji**/"
CLUBS ARE TRUMPS.
Lillian: A Story In Asterisks
How An Author Gave His Colleague a Friendly Hint, and
How It Was Utilized in An Emergency Case.
LILLIAN'S dance I got introduced to an
author man just after dinner. As he was
staying in the house I thought I ought to
be friendly to him, so I told him that we
all thought* a good deal of his stuff in
our village, and that personally I had
read one of his books right thru. He re
plied that it was an extremely cold day,
but that he quite hoped the snow would held over and we
then separated.
This was before the dance began. Afterward, feeling very
well disposed toward everybody, I approached him again.
(He was in a corner, looking rather lonely.) Now I put down
things on paper myself sometimes, so of course we had a good
deal in common.
I said: "Now, what do you do when you suddenly get
stuck, and absolutely can't think of anything to say next?','
He replied: "In such a case I put a row of asterisks."
"Jove!" I said, "that's rather an idea."
"Do you use asterisks much?" he went on.
"Really, you know, I can't say that
I don't know what I should do without my asterisks,"
he said in a melancholy voice. "When the heroine falls into
the hero's armsa row of asterisks. When the villain puts
the rat poison in the mayonnaisea row of asterisks. When
the good aunt moralizeswhen the wicked uncle swears
in all times of doubt, difficulty and emotion, but most of all
when the author himself gets stucka row of asterisks."
"This is very interesting," I told him. I shall cer
tainly remember what you have said. But look here, sup
posing one doesn't know how to begin, supposing one wishes
to *relatd & very delicate matter and doesn't know where to
startcould one lead off with a row of asterisks?"
"Well he began doubtfully, "of course you might
"In that case," I said, I certainly shall."
"Suppose," said Lillian, "you wanted something very
much
She stopped, and began to play with her fan.
"And suppose," she went on, "somebody offered it to
you," and she gave a little sigh.
I should take it," I
said. I seemed a pretty
easy problem, but there's
generally a catch some
where.
"And suppose \ou re
fused itonceand twice
and then suppose
"Look here, let's take
a concrete case," I said.
I was rather proud of
"concrete," but then I
often say quite good
things at dances. "Let's
take a concrete case," I
repeated.
'JAll right, Dick. Dick,
-^18^10 you want most in
thV world?"
A motor-bicycle," I
replied, promptly. (Some
fools say motor-bicycling
is going out, but that's
simple rot.)
A to r-bicycle,''
Lillian repeated softly to
herself. "Well then, Dick, suppose Arthur offered you a
motor-bicycle
I say, may we have that again, please?"
"Suppose Arthur offered you a motor-bicycle
"Look here, let's let that idea sink in a bit first."
I closed my eyes and leaned back, while Lillian fapned
me vigorously.
"No, it's no good," I said at last.
"But, Dick, we're only supposing."
"Oh well-go on."
"And suppose you refused it
"Great Scott," I interrupted, "do you think I'm an ab-
solute idiot?"
"People are sometimes," said Lillian, very sadly. I
don't know why."
"Buta motor-bicycle
"Even with better things than that. Well, Dick, sup
pose Arthur offered it again, and you refused it again
I put my hands over-my ears.
"Please, .Lillian," I said, I can't stand it. The mere
thought is agony. I almost seems as tho I had lost it.
Don't go on."
'"ikrtes
*m
'WHEN THE HEROINE FALLS INTO
THE HERO'S ARMSA ROW OF AS
TERISKS."
you
please. A
y^i-k,.^.
THE
mm.. j|imnuialiiiiuillMll|pn^lllimi'ML inl|iiH|.n auummdt "jagLlMMh
,ft "If the thought is agony, what about the actual thing
I had a sudden and tremendous suspicion, "^#f" !&?$$
I say,"4 began excitedly, "you don't mean that some
body actually has offered you a motor-bicycle, and you've
refused it?"
"It wasn't a motor-bicycle," said Lillian with a smile.
"Oh, well, then
"But something almost as important," and she gave a
little laugh.
"Look here, what has happened? Somebody offered, you
something1?"
"Yes."
A bracelet, let's say."
"Well "And you refused it?"
"Yes." "Why?"
1 ''I thought I didn't want it."
i "And he offered it again?"
"Yes." "He must have been very keen on your having it."
"He was-then."
"And you refused it two or three times?"
"Yes." "And now you want it badly?"
"Tliat's it," said Lillian. "And I don't expect he wants
to give it to me now. He hasn't offered it lately. What do
you think of it, Dick?"
"Just like a woman!" I said. "But I'm glad it wasn't
a motor-cycle,'' I added.
"Is that all, Dick?"
I thought for a little while.
"If you really want it badly, I should tell him. Tell
him you didn't know your own mind at the time."
"But he may have changed his by now. That's the dif
ficulty/
"Surely you can tell. Is he still decent to you?"
"Oh, ratheralways."
"Then I expect he still wants you to have it. It sounds
as tho he's rather keen on you," I said, jealously.
Lillian jumped up.
I shall tell him."
"Tell him you didn't know your own mind. That'll be
rather bad luck on you, you're generally so sure of it."
"Then I shan't tell him I didn't know my own mind,"
said Lillian.
VWell, you must say something."
I shall tell him I didn't know my ownheart."
I shot out of my chair.
"Dick," said Lillian, plaintively, "must I propose to
"You-oh-me-Lill- I think I shall put a row of asterisks here.'
And again, Mr. Printer.
N
That author chap was quite right, you know,
Thank you.-
-Punch.
THEY COULDN'T LOSE.
REPORTER complimented J6hn W. Gates on the Sue
cos's of his recent investments.
"What is the secret of success, Mr. Gates?" he asked.
"The successful man," Mr. Gates replied, "is prepared
for any emergency. He lolls back confidently in his revolving
chair. He reads the ticker wi^h a smile of perfect assurance.
He knows that, whatever happens, he is all right.
"He is, in fact, like the twentieth century Portia.
"$he, a pretty and romantic girl, said one night to the
youth whom she Jiad kept on tenterhooks six months:
'Ho^ft6, look at this buhl cabinet. It has three draw
ers, all'cfosed^and all precisely alike. But open one of them,
and in it you w,ill find my answer to the suit you have
pleaded with such ardor since last June. One drawer con
tains a "yes," and if you choose it I will be yours. The
other two each contain a "no." If you choose one of them,
you will never see me"more.'
'Two to one against me,* the youth groaned. 'Portia
dearest, what cruel whim inspires you to this folly?'
'No whim at all,' the girl replied. 'Only, should things
go wrong with us, I propose to put the blame on chance.'
"The young man shuddered, fie studied the buhl cabinet
attentively. In the lamplight it glittered and glowed. I
seemed to throw malicious glances at him.
'Well, here gogs,' he said.
"And with closed eyes he drew out the middle drawer.
A glad cry escaped him.
'Poitia, you are mine.'
'Yours,' she breathed, throwing herself in his arms.
"The drawer, you see, had contained a paper with the
word 'yes' on it.
"Late that night, after the happy young man had gone
home, Portia, smiling to herself, drew from the other two
drawers their contents, preparatory to burning them. The
other two drawers each contained a paper like thefirstone,
and on each paper the same word 'yes' appeared."
THE SHERLOCK HOLMES SPIRIT.
HE Bill club of Missouri is composed of "good fellows
of the name of Bill." Its members include some of
the leading men of the state.
At the Bill club's last meeting in Excelsior Springs, th^
well-known detective, Hilary K. Adair, was a guest of honor.
Mr. Adair, in responding to a toast, talked about the
Sherlock Holmes spirit.
"^This spirit," he said, "reveals, to its fortunate posses
sors startling truths in the most prosaic happenings. Every
incident of life, to a true Sherlock, is full of wonderful
significanceas full of wonderful significance as an incident
that I witnessed in a grocery the other morning.
"This incident, which revealed to me a whole history of
marital unhappiness, opened with the entrance of a little and
slender man with a weak voice.
'A broom, please,' he said. I wish to purchase a
broom/
"The.grocer produced a 40-cent broom, and praised it
highly.
'One strong point about this broom,' he said, 'is the
handle. I is made of tough, well-seasoned hickory. You
could knock a man down with it, and not break it.'
"The other bit his lip.
I think,' he said, 'that I preferera broom with a
fragile handle, please.'
Once more,
4
ROUGH.
late Henry Harland, author of "The Cardinal's*Snuff
Box" and other graceful stories, was once recounting,
at the Authors' club in New York his experiences as editor
of the famous "Yellow Book."
Mr. Harland praised Aubrey Beardsley.
"Tho only a boy of 21 or so," he said, "Beardsley was
as clever in the editorial as in the contributing capacity., He
was, indeed, practically the art editor of the 'Yellow Book.'
I was fond of him. I once took a three days' walking
trip with him. He sketched, of course, on the walk. He made
a number of sketches in oil colors. And t'hey were very
artistic and shaggy.
A farm hand watched Beardsley finishing a particularly
shaggy sketch one afternoon, and said encouragingly:
'My lad, that won't be a bad picture after it's been
sandpapered down a bit.'
Is not very busy just at pres
ent. We want to get busy.
jjr Ten per cent discount on um
brella coverings as an induce
ment to have you look up your
,f old umbrella and send it to us
for a new cover.
Covers from 75c to $5.00.
OldTlnibrellas made batter than new.
610 NICOLLET.
Gamossi Glove Co. No. 20.
For a trial call
FRANKNESS.
Amateur Begging Letter writer and, dear sir, if you would favor
me with the loan of ten pounds I should be eternally indebted to you."Har-
per's Weekly. (From an unpublished drawing by the late Phil May.)
The Gamossi
Umbrella Hospital
When you think of changing
Laundry remember the Hennepin.
Family Washing
We can relieve you of all the
worry and annoyance attending
wash day.
Simply call us on either phone.
It's easier than depending on the
promises of your washwoman.
^10 pieces of flat work, VzC each.
T. O. 120N. W. M. 621-J.
-THE
ennepin Laundry Co.
S fvt22 1st Avenue North.
rik^k^^^kk^\
INSIST
UPON
CRESCENT
CREAMERY
BUTTER
MUNZER'S
jHow Taking Out the Bad
Makes the Good Better.
SPECIAL SALE OF
FURS
Pianos
Segerstrom Piano Co.
If you could take any of your favorite blends of coffee and
have us prepare it by the steel-cut process and return it to
you, you would noticeyou would then know unmistakably
what is meant when we tell you of the merits of Barring
ton Hall, the steel-cut coffee.
The formula by which this famous brand of coffee is made
is a trade secret worth a great deal of moneya Java and
Mocha blend in the main, but peculiar in its makeup just tho
same.
But the process by which the tannin-bearing yellow skin is
removed and the coffee is prepared makes
justly the coffee for our
nervous American peo-
^-f 4*0 piea coffee that gives a
10 ^Xfi* ftCTP'JPk mild uplift and at the
same time does not wear
on the nerves. The test is in the experience of the thousands
of people who have found Barrington Hall the only coffee
they drink with comfort and without the feeling that they are
injuring themselves in the enjoyment of their favorite bev
erage.
Roasted, steel-cut, packed by machinery in sealed tins and
guaranteed by Baker & Co., Importers, Minneapolis.
For sale by the better class of grocers at 35c per pound.
BarriivgtoiCHal
Defective Page
804 Nicollet Avenue
An Attractive Large
REGINA
One Dollar
A WEEK
Minnesota Regina Co.
329 Hennepin Av.
Pretty Display Rooms.
Second Floor
If--
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