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THE .SALT LAKE TREBUiYK, SUNDAY MOANING, DJiCIOLBER LM, 3911. m
1 OEOISE ;liri JEW FABLES DM S-tft .IMltf m Pictures by Albert Levering ; - I mm New tFaLle of tke h Life of tke Party MB XE Night a CompliinenLary mS I Dinner was given to a Cap- wffii lain of Industry by some ijlnjl i'Vicnds looking for Orders, jyfjff The Chairman oF the Arrange- wmM mcnls Committee was a popular MB Winc-Pushcr, consequently the volunteer Scaruh Parties were out B J or Three Days after, gathering Along about 10:30, when every I Perfect Gen 1 Ionian was neatly f Stewed, a, IUau connected with I I he Jobbing Trade got up to say a few Words. Tie was keyed to Concert Pitch and the Audience was Piped and all the old sure-fire Bokum of a. R Sentimental Nature simply Killed them in their Scats. When he Concluded the hilar- 3 ious Bun Brothers, Avith. the I roussed-up Hair and the twisted I Shirt Bosoms, arose to their Feet and waved Napkins and gave the Orator what he dc- scribed to his "wife at 2 A. flL as A Novation, jj- Another Good Man was spoiled, j After Herman made this gosh- ij awJ'ul Hit with the Souses he be- came convinced that he was an After-Dinner "Wit. Gus Thomas and Sirnoon Ford had nothing on him. Whenever he found himself seated at a Table with other Peo- pic and Food being served he bc- f gan to suck Lozenges and classify jl his Anecdotes and try to appear K Unconcerned. I 'All the .time he was simply ' waiting for the Main Fluff to j! come up from behind the Chrys- jj anthemums and say, " Vfc have i with us this evening." j , Then for the quiot , Jnlroduc- lion, leading up to lhc; sparkling ! Mot and the Tremolo Stop pulled all the Way out on the Pathos and a couple of Depcws to put them in a Good Humor, conclud ing with a Hypodermic of Hot Mush. Jf the Hunch sat back and re fused to Fall for the Wnr-Time Favorites he would console him self by lolling around that he was up against the Low-Brows. AVhcnever People sat down in front of the decorative Canape Caviar and got ready 1o endure the Horrors of another Hotel Gorge, they Avould glance across) tho Snowy Expanse of: "White, j dotted with plump California! Olives and cold, unfeeling Celery, and seeing Merman seated oppo site, would remark. "Stung!"' i He could not have been kept And Seeing- Herman Seated Opposite, Would Remark, "Stung!" lie Knew that he was a "Ding er, because he remembered how the Magnificent Assemblage stood and cheered him for five Min utes. Therefore his Voice sounded to him a good deal like the' Boston Symphon- Orchestra playing Rubinstein's Melody in F. in his Chair with a Ton of Coal in each Tail-Pocket. And if The Ladies were present that was where he worked in the Bird-Calls and ordered out the Twinkling Stars. According to the Expectation Tables of the Insurance Actuar ies, probably he will Stick around for 32 years more and never find out. that he is a Pcsl. MORAL Those Avho bemoan the Decline of Oratory should re member that Oratory never was known to Decline. New Fable of tke Honeymoon That T ried to Come j Back ONCE there' was an un divorccd Couple that would gel up every G. M. and put on the five-ounce Mitts and wait for the Sound of the Gong. Each was working for the Championship of the Flat and proved to be a Glutton for Pun ishment. Every lime he landed a crush ing 1 lay-Maker on her Family History she countered with a short-arm Jolt on his Personal Appearance. Both would retire to the Cor ners breathing heavily, but still full of Comba.t. He loved to start out the Day by finding in the Paper what a Professor connected with the Uni versity of Chicago had said about the American Woman being a vain and shallow Parasite with a Cerebrum about the size of an English Walnut. She would retaliate by reading aloud a Special in regard to a Husband going after Wife with Axe, while under the Influence of Liquor. After which, for 15 or 20 min utes, the Dining Room would be just as peaceful and quiet as a Camorra Trial. Sometimes he would get First "Blood, but just as often she would fiddle around for an Opening and then Zowie! right on the Conk and him Stalling to escape fur ther Punishmeut. Motel Flanders 133-137 West 47th St. N. Y. CITY. 200 Feet East of Br'oadvay. A modern fireproof hotel In th heart of the thcator. club and hotel district; convenient to all enr linen. An exceptional orches tra. Rooms with private bath, ?2 per day. From Qrand Central Station. Broadway cars without transfer. From Pennsylvania. Sta tion. 7th avonti4 cars without transfer. Booklet on reauenL H. R. SHARES, Prop. . "When Nightfall came they would still be edging around the Ring, whanging away, for each was loo Game to be a Quitter. Their Married Life, which started out with American Beauty Roses in every Vase and a long Piece in the Paper, now settled down to a Thirty Years War with all of the Attendant Horrors. The only time the Dove of Poor the Dove of Peace would beat it and another domestic Gettysburg would drive the Ser- I v.-.nts to Cover. After this had been going on for several Seasons ho happened to get hold of a Powerful Work, written by a Popular Novelist (Unmarried). who made a psychological Dissection of n AVo- i man's Soul and then preached nj Both Would Eotiro to tlio Comoro Breathing Heavily, hut Still full of Combat. Peace really Lit was when Ihey had Company. Then they would Dear gach other until I he Premises became Sticky anil she would even coax up a Ripple of Fake Laughter when he pulled some Wheeze that used lo go Great I he 'Year they wore engaged. Unl. the Moment the last Guest closed the Front Funeral Sermon over the Dead ! Love that once blossomed in the Heart of the Heroine. After ho read" this Tragedy of flickered" Romance he felt like a Pup. - v ' .lie- Perceived thai", he had been j in the Wrong. The Novelist taught, him that his Cue iv as to bear with the Weaker Vessel and tokS Honeymoon of True ffecM" pruned and waterc' by Der'fl' and Sacrifice. B Therefore, he made one (9 Vow to cut out the Hough 9 Next Morning when the q9 of the Ama.jms put on her Ml and Feathers and began t0 J the big AVar Dm,,, u10re .9 Nothing Doing. B He refused to enter the blfl stained Arena and when fl atter him he fell over and til the Count before a pHnch II been delivered. Before starting for the 0M1 he Kissed her a couple of til ' and gave her some )hM Tcatment around the SlioiiJ Blades and called m "Tobls'l a Term of .Endearment whl had been rusting on the Shi ever since they i,SCl j at I Falls. el She was so dazed by this "i versa I or Form that she n$ from the Front Window a watched him clear to the fori convinced that he was on his to meet Another Woman, i i Me came home that Event ' with a Jar of Candied XuU a" 1 when Airs. Simon Le-roe deoiaij I ed the Name of the m)- j simply pulled a Teaming Snl i and. invited- her to go ahead a i use him as a Punching-Bug. '( I Next day she put n N'ovapgp ' around the Bird Cage and tied! the Geranium and took the unfl j ished Tatting and Blew. AVhen she walked in on h ' Own People, with the Declaratu j that all Bets were Off, thcvtffliRfl ed to know how about it, and s said-, a Spirited Woman cquldii j keep on rooming with ;i (jninei j MORAL Contempt breed Familiarity. z f (Copyright. 1011. by George Adt.J jt I MAN WRITES AN OPERA A WEEK, YET DOES NOT KNOW A NOTE OF MUSll B BY ALMER C. SANDBORN. Hm f I 1 IIKRK arc probabK few musical composers who Hji I would bo willing to sign a. contract with a WM J ilicalcr manager in which they agreed to fur- IH nish one original operetta :i week, play I ho nio&t iniporlant role in it, conduct all the rehearsals Mj and writo from live to a dozen songs to be sunp by Hl the vaudeville actors who appeared on the programme BH following the opcrolta. Most of thorn would refuse BB sneli a prnposilion on the ground that tbey wanted a H little 1 iuiq to cat and sleep. And if any of them had BEj that happy faculty of getting nlonfr without Flccp and thought seriously of talcing the job thoy would Wm ccrtniuly hold up their hands in anguish as soon as HK they heard that the remuneration was only $40 a week. HB There is one man in this country, however, who HK has signed a contract to do that very thing, lie has HB bound himself to write the music of one operetta a Bl week, to conduct all its rehearsals and play the prin- Wmw ripal role twice a day. In addition ho has agreed to wNm furni.sh other actors with all the new songs thoy need Warn for their different acts from week to week. There is HIE no miftaking tho fact, that it sounds impossible, but flHS David Meirowitz performs that miracle every week. HB and on Saturday night receives his check for $40. Add BB to tn'3 nc teirowitz cannot Tea 1 BB music, that he does not know one note from another, BB tnat bo has never heard more than three or four operas BB n 1'' nn accomplishment becomes ono of the BB most astounding things of modem times. Bay Every one who hears his music calls him a genius, HI but thnt.is only for want of a stronger term, Tho word Bill ''genius" has been much abused in recent years. Jt BB ,n5 nccn promiscuously applied to persons who had unusual talent and an extraordinary ability for de- BB vcloping it. BW T UT it is no misuse of the word to apply it to HB O David Meirowitz. Fie is now a man of thirty.. BB and has been in this country about cightceu years. He B was born in "Russia. Ho dij not grasp a violin and HI Hay Bach's Two Part Inventions violently when be BH w'a two days old, as many prodigies are said to have BH done. Tie did not oven come of a musical family. jN'o BHH one knew that he had. any music in him. Ho did not BH oven know it himself until he was forced by circum- (itnuccx to bring it out. He left Russia when he was BH about twelve years old. Flo had no money and he pBli needed it to travel. Ho needed a great deal, in fact. HB ior n0 na( sc n'a keart upon coming to America, and it takes more thnn a boy of twelve can cam by manu- Hn a labor to make that voyage. iHj As he traveled he sang. Sometimes he would stop BkI an(I s'nc t0 :i "r011I) children. He sang them some HB of the old Russian folk songs, and now and then a HB Yiddish ballad that his mother had sung to bim. UB Those were tho songs that were nearest to his beau HE just then whou ho was leaving homo and striking out HH for himself, bound for a strnngo land. They meant Bwff K0 mucn 10 mm lna nC Vut n's n'kolc soul into the KB rendering of them. Ho sang them more to keep up IBB n's onn -P'r'ts than anything else, but ihey moved those who heard him, and they threw him coins as he passed b Often ho stopped at an inn with no money to pay for food and lodging, and then he would sing to the landlord. Tie would sometimes compose the words and music of a soug about the landlord or his wife or his pretty daughter. This invariably amused them and thev always took him in and gave him shelter. It was only by singing so much that he arrived at the idea of composing his own music. It rather amused him to make up music; it became a sort of pastime. It re lieved the monotony of his trip. It never once occurred to him that he was doing anything unusual. Ho sup posed that any one could make up music if h0 wanted to. And that was tho way ho camo to America. He improvised a song about the captain of a vessel that was bound this way and got his passage free. He sang to tho steward and got his food. A'T LAST he landed in New York with fifty dollars in his pocket and tho discouraging prospect of ckiug out a living in a strange land. Tt would have been discouraging to most people, and many give up under the strain. But .David Mcirowitsi was always optimistic. He sings his way through life and is sel dom downhearted. He found many of his compatriots in tho lower cast side section of New York and he went to live among them. Uc found there a sort of "cafe concert." where people sat and drank soft drinks, while, on an improvised stage at ono end, sing crs and dancers did turns for whatever coins those seated at tho tables were willing to throw them. Meirowitz gained admission there and sang for the amusement of th0 drinkers, sometimes his own songs and sometimes a popular hit of the day by some well known composer. He soon saw that his own songs were just as well received and sometimes better received than thoso of his more learned contemporaries, ?o he relied mostly on his own compositions. In that way he rose or fell entirely on his own merits. It was an uncertain life, rather hit or miss, but he enjoyed it, and continued to do the same thing for several years, until at last the cafe conceit was changed into a musio hall. It is now the Gn.ud music hall, a Yiddish variety theater, at the corner of Grand aud Orchard streets in the very heart of the cast side of New York City. Meirowitz is still there, but ho has Tisen from the posi tion of singing for pennies until he is now the com poser of all the theater's operettas, the writer of all its fongs and its principal actor. lie no longer de pends on the generosity of the audience. Uc gets a stated salar3- of fortv 'dollars a week. But what is forty dollars a week for the amount of work he docs" One" even wonders how he finds time to accomplish all that he docs. Read the schedule of his average day: At 6 p. m. he rises awd eats. his breakfast. At 8 a. m. he usually goes to the theater to roucarse the operetta for the next week and to arrange the orchestration of a new operetta with the conductor of the orchestra. At 12 in. he eats hia lunch. At 1:30 p. m. ho returns to the theater to. dress for the matlneo performance At 2 p. m. the performance begins. At G p. m. he cats dinner At 7:30 p. ni. he returns to the theater to dress for tho ovonlng performance. At 8 p. ni. the evening performance begins. At 11 p. ni. he goes to bod. T UOBABIjY you are wondering when he composes J- his operettas and songs. His day is entirely oc cupied with I.Ik; other things ho has to do. Of course, tliero arc only Iwcnty-four hours in a dav and lii.s time is all accounted for. The answer is that '.Mr. Meirowitz is a master in the art of t ho conservation of tunc. J lu composes his operettas and songs in all the spare mo ments ho has during the day, ulid even while ho is doing something else. While ho eats, ho is working out in his mind the air of a new song. Ho insists that while he sleeps melodies aro running through his head which ho can sing as soon as he awakes in the morn JVff" 1 ROts a" tIlG "Pessary tunes in his head and then when he has a forenoon that it is not ncccssarv to spend at the rehearsal he and the conductor of the orchestra arrange the partition. Jt was said at the beginning that ho does not know one note- from another and that is literally true; it is impossible for him to read a piece of music, no mat ter how simple it may be. And now you uudoubtcdlv want to know how he can write music without know ing how to read it. As a matter of fact, it is not oxact lo say that he writes music: ho merelv composes it. He has it all in his head. When he has finished his operetta, he takes the libretto and sings his airs as ho reads tho words to the conductor. The conductor transcribes the music as he sings it and tfien arranges the partition for the different members of his orelies tra. That is how David Meirowitz furnishes one op. crotta a week to his manager, and that is whv he is called the "music incubator." For the last eighteen years he has been doing nothing but draw music from his brain. Ho knows nothing of books and art. He is really unlettered. Uc is indifferent about the theater and the opera house. He lives in Dclauc3' street, scnrcclv a block away from the music hull to which he devotes his time. He eats regiilarlv at Sach's restaurant, only two blocks down the street, lie never leaves the neighborhood where he has lived since he came to this country.. But he ha;; this extraordinary streak .or melody in his make-up; he is scntimontn'l; he is ori ental in his manner; and everi'thing he composes has an original swing to it. MEIT0VITZ has already written thirty-sis com plete operettas und several hundred songs, livervthing that he has eoinposed has had an immense success among those who have heard the compositions. Hut few of them ever reach the outside world. Meiro witz does not Heel: fame. If he be successful in tho little world about him, that is all he asks. Some of his son;s. however, have become known outside and thev all attained instantaneous success. It was ho who wrote Thoni.-ischeiTsk3's "success-ballad," 'Tsroelik Kuni Ahoim," .Jacob A. Adlcr's "Gotl und Sein '. Mislipot. is (Jerncht," and the song which is sung by Bernard Bernstein, the comedian, entitled' "Kol Yisroel Kabarim.-" Meirowitz never published any of his works, lie did not know that they were wortli publishing. But once in a while someone" from anothor theater dropped in at tho little Grand musde hall, heard his music, and knew immediately that it was worth publishing. Tlwy proceeded to Hud out who the composer was. They were ilirectcd lo Meirowitz. They asked him how much he. wanted fur t lie .song they had heard ha didn't know, lie had no idea of t lit prices for musical com- . positions. They offered him ton. dollars. I In accepted ' it eagerly. Thai is the price he has get for all the songs he has sold. It is interesting to compare with this the rumor that the publisher who printed "Isroe lik Tvum Ahoim" made $."5000 on tho operation. Tho sum may not bo correct. But it is certain that he made a large amount of money, for the popu larity of the song was immense. It boeaino, in fact, the Jewish national hymn. Many of his songs' huvo been placed on phonograph records. AlmoBt everyuue has heard some of them. Xcvcr a day goes by 'that, a hurdy-gurdy in every large city in the land docs not play one of them. Meirowitz receives ten dollars apiece for these successes and turns them out in his sleep. He is just beginning to understand their real value. Tho rumors that others arc building $5000 houses on the profits from his songs have opened his eyes. He is learning what a fortune his gift is to him. Writing music is not an effort for him; he simply doos it in his spare moments. Let him insist on a contract with his publisher and a written promise of reasonable royalties and his fortune is made. There is no chance ; for piracy of his music. It is not written; he lit all in his head. He could not. write it if ho tdfjLi ho needs to do is to refrain from singing unlil I i( contract is signed. It is' impossible to steal his w (l from him. j ff you wish to prove tho value of -Meiromli music; you have only to go and hear it. He is a'" 'I on hand at his thea'ter every week with a brand j operetta, and everything in it is original. Mehow , cannot make over another's work, for l'fl cannot rj 8 it. His work uniiostionabIy Justine." tho ueo cf I wov geuiij's with regard to uiinaiid Jio nugot rankaa' Lho busiest mini in New York. ; f. Oh, What a Wretch to Treat His Wife & Two fishermen named .left's, living near each other, had met. with misfortune, the one haviug lost his wife and the other his boat. A lady visitor called on the one who had lost his boat, thinking it was the one who had lost his wife, and the following conver sation ensued: "Good-morning, Mr. Jen's! I am sorry to hear of vour sad loss." "Oh, it ain't of much consequence, mum; she warn't up to uiueh.'-' ' 4 Dear me, von dou't say so!" "Ay. she was a rickety old crock. When I wont out with her I was always in danger of my life." "Indeed." 'T oft'orod her to 1113- mute onlv last week, but. he wouldn't hnve her: but I have had my eye on another for some time now. and5' But the ladv could stand no more of the old man s j i We Make Tlteii Good ss New Cracked or broken machinery or au tomobile parts of nil metals repaired by Autogenous welding. Utah Welding Co. Bell Phone 1S30. 20 Richards St. Promise of. Rcloaso. Jarin Al'ichaclis. the author of "The DasjJI ous Age.; was talking in Now Yc-k about ber ldcBl diyoicc insurance. fw" There would be less need of -divorce inrotaiM she said, "if there were not so many mercenary and foolish graybcards. When a mercenary girl ries a foolish graybenrd then tho divorce Jnninjjf agents should flock around." .Mi The wcll-knowu novelist here' toKI an approfnJJ "A chorus girl," she said, 4 ' having J''?Bj ricd an need, millionaire, got a lottcr to " 'If you do not put $50,000 in the tree I JjWC! your house tonight we will blow up your U-WB1H The Black Hand,' .. twMlm "The young bride, instead of putting .v the tree box. put this note there; 1 A'ij 1 ' ' Cannot meet your views as, regard w ff otherwise vour proposition deeply interest j -M, innocent, denunciation of the vTcaker ?. ,si B riedly took her departure. M Fun.. JNt "Now." said the chairman ot the cCP,1" mittee. "if it will suit your convenience w VVjBJ 'luet you through somo of the greatcet .tablishments, I feel that it is safe to ssurc ;..(,' vou will find them interesting, if not inst" jjW "Thank you," replied the disUpguisaea ftj "but r would reallv prefer to put " th . a,TtSB? witnessing some Jiind of sport, if '0" ?,; ' M in that:. line that you consider worth raetWB5 "Very well. We will go out to the There fcrc to be automobile, niotorcjcle jm races, aud there is almost sure to oc a r 1 Bell Phone 876. IndT Phone fit If) W. S. HENDERSON I WHOLESALE GROCER. ' , I Corner Second South and Third Wet Sis- - Salt Lake Oity, Utah. Prompt Shipments to All Parts of the Oo' ! High-Grade Groceries. Mail Orders Sojfo.