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The Washington herald. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1906-1939, June 18, 1910, Image 6

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Entered at a the th pwtofflce at t Washington D a aal C
as wrenddiM mall 3i1 matter matterFubllthed m tter tterPublhhed
Fubllthed Every Morning in the h Year by byTHE byTIlE byTHEWASHINGTON
Under the th Direction Dircc on of ofSCJTT oE5c
HENRY L 1 WEST Bu Budne Ine M MIDaccr MIDaccrT afrf
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Daily DaU without SuwUy WH fO > P per yer yer6anday 3e1Sundar ye yeSQod
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No attention will be b paid to anonymou anonymouscontributions anonymoucontrlbldions anonymoucontrfbHtion3 I
contributions and no communication to tothe tc I
the editor will be printed except over otJ r the th thname I
t name a n < of < te Je 6 writer writerManuscripts 1QrlterManuscripts
Manuscripts offered for publication pu Ucatlon will UlmteT8turn
te teT8turn Ie returned if unavailable but atamsshould stamps stampsshould I
should be sent acn with the manuscript for forthat forthat 01
that purpose purposeAll PUrpOB8All
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newspaper whether whoth r for the daily or the thtJSunday till 5
Sunday issue S8U6 should be addressed to toTHE t t2ffE
SPECIAL SPECULAGESCY AGENCY Brunswick Bulldta BuU11nz BuU11nzRepret
Chicago BcprecestaUra Repret rlaU o BABNABD I BEAR BllCILUr
ILUr HAM Boyce Bofldtes BofldtesSATURDAY Bui1d1nrSATURDAY
SATURDAY JUNE 18 IS i 1910 1910Home
6 6Home
Home News Away Awayfrom from Home HomeWashlnstonlans HomeWashingtonIans
WashingtonIans who leave the thecity thedty
city lty either for a a short or long longstay longstaywhether ong
stay staywhether whethar they go to mountain mountainor
or seashore or avon across the sea seashould ea eashould
should not fail to order The TheWashington ThoWashington i
Washington Herald s Hnt nt to them themby themby
by mall It will come regularly regularlyand regularlyand
and the addresses will be changed changedas anged angedas
as often as desired It Itis is the homo homonews homonews
news you will want while whI1 away awayfrom awayfrom
from home Telephone Main Maingiving 88W 88Wgiving
giving old 91d and new address addressThe addr6lsThe
The Prize Fight KghtGov FightGov PightGov
Gov Glllett was a 8 little tardy in mov moving movJng nio ¬
ing in the matter of the prize fight to fc fcheld De Deheld b 10
held in San Francisco but he has moved movedin movooin move Id
in time enough to prevent the injury that thatwould thatWould th Lt l
would have been done to his State by bycountenancing byountenaneln b 5
countenancing ountenaneln the contest It would wouldcertainly wouldertalnly mvouh I
certainly have spoken batter for Cali California California Cal I IornIa ¬
fornia had the governor made hs hi de decision dBlslon d dIs1on ¬
cision lslon earlier for then the suspicion that thathe thathe thI it itie t
he was largely influenced Ift uenced in the matter matterby matterb matt a ab r
b by hopes hop of securing the Panama Expo Exposition ExpofiUon txpi 1 ¬
sition for his SttUft would not have bean beanpresent beanIresent bec becrresent Ill 1Ill 1
present presentBut IresentBut rresentBut
But whatever the motive that urged the thegovernor thegorernor U 10 8
governor to immediate action he will willundoubtedly willlmdoubtedly wi Ill Illundoubted1
undoubtedly undoubted1 receive the thanks and com commendation eommendaUoa con conrnendatloa ¬
mendation of a large proportion of the thelawabiding thelawabklifts ti a 0lawabiding
lawabiding people of th the country Never Neverin NeYerin Nov or orin r
in in the history of sporte has a prise fight fightbeen fightbeen figi lit litIn t
been so widely advertised and only onlya in ina Ina n
a few instances has h there been any anypretense 8 sAIiyretense 3 3fretenie
pretense that the proposed pre O8 encounter be between be be1weeR betweek ¬
tween the white roan and the negro was wasbe wasbe wasbe
be a boxing match and not a prize prizeiUeotfon prizev
T iUeotfon UOD as to whether boxing con contests contests conTests ¬
tests are deatrable le things thln s to foster fo or orencourage orfnalUral8 orfnourage
encourage te a queetien after aft all of offifties ofthies ofettlic
fifties Many good men and true believe believetnat believebat believetrat
bat boxing box1n should be encouraged and andthere andthere andthere
there is a lot of force tore and truth truth in the theargument theargument theargument
argument often brought forth that thatthere thatthere thatthere
there is more brutality and real danger dangerin danarIn
in a college football match than in a afght atght afght
fght between professionals prof llalonals But these thesequestions theucsUO theaejuestionS
questions ucsUO 8 are not involved at this time timeThe UmeThe timeTh
The Th question que tlon that Gov Gillett had to de deridd d81M docId
ridd cId 1M was whether the law of his State suiteforbidding Stateforbidding StatecrhtddIng
forbidding prize fights was about abput to be beviolated betoated b bylolated
violated Every one will realize that he hetook hetook hetolk
took the commonsense t mmonlen viow when hedecided hedecIded he bedecided
decided to stop it itAnd ItAnd it itAnd
And there is I another view of the matter matterthat matterlhat matterhat
that hat will aid many people in commending commendingGov commendIngGO
Gov GO by Gilletts stand and that is the linen financial linenial ¬
cial 101 phase Never before in a prize prlz fight fighthas Oghtlas tightJas
has the question of money m ney entered so solargely IiOlargely solargely
largely Constantly we have heard of
the vast sums sum that are to be won by on onor ono onoor oneor
or the other of these e fighters fighters So many manythousands manythousands manythousands
thousands for fighting so many man thou thousands thouands ¬
sands ands for or the picture privilege so much muchadmission muohadmission muchaJoufaslon
admission charged for watching them themtrain themtrain themtrain
train so much an article for tolling how howthey howthey howthey
they are going to do it It The boxing con contest contEst ¬
test tEst or the prize fight has almost been beanlost beenlost beeniort
lost sight of In n all this talk about cash cashUndoubtedly cashVndoubtedly cashtndoubtuly
Undoubtedly the prize fight would have havedrawn havedrawn havedrawn
drawn a lot of sports to San Francisco Franciscoand FrancilreOand Franciscoand
and these would have left a lot of money moneybehind moneybehind moneybehind
behind but we doubt much whether this thisfort thisFort thieFort
fort of money mon6 would have done San SanFrancisco SanFrancIsco SenFrancisco
Francisco any permanent good goodCertainly soodCertainly goodertainly
Certainly ertainly it would have been a sum sumInsufficient sumimmfflclcQt sumirsumcient
Insufficient to offset the Injury done to tothe tothe totime
the good name of the State StateO
0 Henrys Opinion of 0 Henry HenrySays HenrySays HenrySays
Says tho Topeka Capital CapitalO
O Henry thought himself a falluro faJlureSomehow falluroSomehow falluroSomehow
Somehow wo doubt the absolute ac accuracy accuracy accuracy ¬
curacy of that statement sta tern lint It may be betrue betrue betrue
true but It doss not seem seEUnreasonable seEUnreasonableIn reasonable reasonablein
in view Iew of
all the circumstances war warranting warranting warranUng ¬
ranting a contrary opinion opinionWe opinionWe opinionWe
We suspect the th thing that gave rise to tothis tothis tothis
this impression is that bat success uccs never neverturned neert1llned neverturned
turned O Henrys head headnot not ever vet so soslightly 0f1hghtIy soslIghtly
slightly Publishers clamored for his hiswork hisworle hiswon
work won for several years before he died diedhe diedhe diedhe
he was permitted parmltt d to fix his own price pricein price1n priceIn
in marketing his literary wares He got gotabout gotabout gotabout
about all there was Jas as to be had in the thepursuit thepursuit thepursuit
pursuit of his hi iti profession proto professionmoney stonmoney money repu reputation reputation reputation ¬
tation and the other indefinite and elu elusive elusive olusive ¬
sive things supposedly attaching attacJ ng thereto theretoHe theretoHe theretoHe
He might have swaggered and an thrown thrownout thrownout thrownout
out his chest he
might have elected not notto notto notto
to be like humbler mortals he might mighthave mighthave mighthave
have affected a patronizing attitude to toward toWard toward ¬
ward others seeking diligently earnestly earnestlyquietly earnestlyuietIy earnestlyquietly
quietly < and an aBc unostentatiously unostentatiousl to approxi approximate approximate approximate ¬
mate his accomplishments But he did didnone didnone didnone
none of those e things He was modest modestshrinking modestshrJn1dng modestshrinking
shrinking he hid himself away away from the thepublic tbeubUc theubli
public ubUc ubli as much ps 5 possible po lblc he was shy shyand shrnnd sh shnnd
nnd reserved save nve perhaps to tho few
Who vho were so fortunate as to win and andkold andoId andioId
kold ioId oId his Intimate frienhlp frleft Shlp and regard regardAnd regardAnd regardAnd
And yet in all allot of that there is nothing nothingUpon nothIngpon nothingiJpon
Upon pon which hlch onemay rationally rest a aSuspicion ausplcion auspicIon
Suspicion > that 0 Henry thought him himelf hlmE1t himelf
elf a failure On the contrary contrar he still stillJalSht stillfSht sUItI sUIt1ght
JalSht fSht fcsyd hSV realized that he was In his
way wa y and in his calling a tremendous tremendoussucoess
success su sulie ccess We think he must have be belleved beUeved
lleved lie ved that the t in fact The possession of otordInary ofdinary
ordinary or dinary common sense ense surely told him himbut hlmput himt
but put bu t ah mh the saving grace of that t at other otherrare
i rare ra re sweet common sense that kept his hishead
head he hean ad absolutely level and his heart fresh freshand freshd
and an d responsive even amid all the rest restOur re5tOur restOur
Our idea is that O Henry never felt felthis felthis telts
his hi s work was to be so good that it might mightnot
not no t have been better We do not imagine Imaginebe
j he ever turned in a story to his pub Ub UbUshers
n Ushers us usyo hers believing It to t bQ b perfect and be beyond beyond bend ¬
yond yo nd criticism crltfelsm To that extant extantand and no nomore nomore
more m ore if that spells 5P1l any an fraction of fall fallure fa11ureO
l ure ureO ur eO O Henry probably held his opinion opinionof
0 of himself in check checkAnd
And if that be the truth about O OHanry OBOOTY 0ony
BOOTY H ony what a magnificent success he hewas hewas
f was w as Indeed IndeedA
A Word for Sidney Bieber BieberThe BieberTho BieberThe
The ups and downs of our friend Sid Sldney Sidney SidOY
ney fl OY Biaber Bieberthe the onagainoffagalnFin onagainoffagalnFinnegan
negan fl fl characteristics of his nomination nominationfor
f for fo r collector of the port of Georgetown Georgetownremind Georgetownremind
f remind re mind us of an episode back In Clove Clevolands Clevelands Clovends
lands la 1J nds second administration administrationA
A sporting individual out in Ohio who whopracticed whopracticed
practiced p racttced Democratic politics on tho thoside thoside t
side si de finding his luck running contrari contrariwise contrariwise
v wise w ise conceived the Idea that tho time timebad timebad timead
j bad h ad come to reform and ho developed devel ped an onambition anambition anmbition
ambition a to settle down In a government governmentposition gOvernment gOvernmentposition
1 position p osition In Washington His record as a aregular aregular aegular
i regular r was In his favor tho civil serv service serve erv ervIce ¬
j ice Ic e regulations did not offer the obstruo obstruotions obstruotions
tions ti < ons of the present day dl and moreover moreoverhe rnoreov6lhe moreovere
he h e had an influential friend at court courtComing oourtComing courtComing
Coming to the Capital he was taken tak n to tothe tothe
the t he Interior Department and formally formallypresented formallypresented formallyresented
presented p to the Secretary Hoke Smith SmithHis SmithHis
His H is reception was cordial The Georgian Georgiangavo Georgiangave
gave g ave him tho glad hand applauded his hisambition 111sambition 1115mbition I
ambition a an4 promised to keep him in inmind Inmind inind
mind m ind That was all allThis allThis
This was wholly unsatisfactory to the thereformed thereformed I
reformed r sport from Ohio He did not notwant no t
want w ant to be kept In mind He wanted a ajob ajob n nob I
job j ob And he h proceeded to lot the Hon HonHoke lIonHoke Honoke
Hoke H oke Smith know kn w hew he olt about It ItNow ItNow It
Now look hore Mr Secretary ho hosaid hesaid lu
said s aid in thunderous tkundaro voice voSe and with a John JohnL JohnL JoluSullivan I
L L Sullivan swagger about the mahog mahogany mahoSan inahogny ¬
any an a ny desk d deaknow kuno now look here if Im goin to togit toglt toit
git g it it Id like to know it It and if I aint aintgoln aintsotn alrftem
goln g em to git It Id like to know IL It I dont dontcare dontcare dontto
care to be dubbin aroun on a dead deadcard deadcard deadard
card cardJhat c ard
Jhat ht Is precisely the way wo feel about aboutour aboutOBI aboutur
our o ur friend Sidney Bieber If I ha Is going goingto goingtc goingo
to t o get that Georgetown Goorgat wn colleotorship he heought h hought heught
ought o ught to know it it If I he isnt going to get
I i he ought to knew it It We do not like Hkoto fkoto likeo
to t o think of Sidney dubbin aroun on a adead aI aesdeard
dead d esdeard esdeardThe card cardThe cardThe
I The Ohio man did not get it It ItConservation ItCoetion
Conservation CoetionConros
I Congress has done a good stroke of ofbusiness otI ofbus1ns
I business for the country in passing the thebill thebill
bill authorizing the President to with withdraw withdraw ¬
I draw from entry entr any public lands of the theI thej
I United r j States which he thinks should shouldnot shouldI shouldbe
I not be open la to settlement until Congress Congresshas CongrouI Congresshas
I has had a chance to decide what shall shallbe
I be done with them President Roose Rooser
velt n and Secretary seerota ry of the Interior Gar Garfteld Grfield
field believed that tho power to do this thisalready
I was already vested ested in the President
President Pre ldont Taft and his Attorney Attorne General Generalbelieved Generalbelieved
believed that the President Pr ldent had no such suchpower suchpower suchpower
power Lands had bean withdrawn dur durJng during
ing the previous administration under underthe underUJe underUe
the belief that the Chief Executive had hadacted hadacted hadacted
acted legally and those withdrawals withdrawalsPresident wlthdr8waJsPresident withdrawalsPresident
President Taft allowed to stand though thoughin
in a letter to former Secretary Garfield GarfleWhe Garfieldhe Garfieldhe
he expressed the belief that a consider considerable considerable considerable ¬
able stretch of the Secretarys power powerwas powerInvohecJ powerwas
was involved involvedWith InvohecJWIth InvolvedWith
With these doubts doubts It was as well that the thewhole thewbole thewhole
whole matter should go o before Congress Congressfor Congressfor Congrosefor
for settlement and In securing tho thesage pas passage assa ¬
sage sa of this bIn 11th the President Pr 8l ent has not notonly notooly notonly
only been able to legalize l gaHze the withdraw withdrawals wIthdrawals withdrawale ¬
als already alr fldy made by President Reese Roosevelt R005event Reesevolt ¬
volt vent but has firmly put the government governmentseal goornmontseal governmentseal
seal of approval upon the whole policy policyof policyof policyof
of conservation conservationHow cortSOI8tlonHow conservationHow
How these lands thus reserved by the theUnited theUnited theUnited
United States are ultimately to be used usedhow IIodhow usedbow
how they are to be settled or disposed of offor offor offor
for the th greatest benefit bone t to the country countryand countr countrand countryand
and the people is 1 a question that has yet yetto yetto et etto
to bo taken up by the friends of conser conservation conservation censorvatlon ¬
The Kaiser K Jli asked for an Increase of ofSfIOOOO ofin
300000 in salary and the Reichstag has hasawardod hasawardod hasawarded
awardod him S90GOi OOOe 00t That is the kind kindof kindof kindf
of o f Congress to have Mr President PresidentCongress PresidentCongr8EIs PresidentCongress
Congress hopes hop 5 to adjourn on Satur Saturday Saturday Saturday ¬
day June Juneii 26 This makes the hope unan unanimous unanImous unanmous ¬
imous I mous of course courseStill courseStln courseStill
Still Representative Harrison should shouldbe shouldbe shouldbe
be thankful that his turndown turn lown < at the theWhite theWhlte theWhite
White House did not come two years yearsearlier yearsearlier yearsearlier
earlier Then the bullpup might have havebeen havebeen ave avebeen
been chased on O him also alsoIsnt alsoIsnt alsoIsnt
Isnt It strange how a 530100000 irri irrigation Irrigation Irrigatlon ¬
gation subsidy bill for the benefit of the theWest theW6It
West can go through Congress slick as asa asa asa
a whistle 1 asks the Charlotte Chroni Chronicle Cronlcleo Chronidc ¬
cle dc Well VeUertherc er there are It seems to us usstranger uastrangsr usstranger
stranger things thingsA thingsA thingsA
A man In InNcw New York Is reported to have haveturned haveturned haveturned
turned blue as indigo A Rough
Rider Rider perhaps who finally has become becomeconvinced becomeconvinced becomeconvinced
convinced that the colonel never again againwill agaInw1l1 againwill
will be a candidate for the
Presidency PresidencyThe PresidencyThe PresidencyThe
The season sehson of theoretical ethereal
mild mildnass mildnass mildfloss
nass now about to expire by limitation limitationwill limitationwill limitationwill
will go down in
history as the great greatplcnicless greatplcnlcle greatpienicleas
plcnicless s spring springGive springGive springGive
Give the money to the women ad advises advisas advises ¬
vises Gov Crothers The Th ruff
suffragettes suffragettesought suffragettesought agettes agettesought
ought to b6 solid for Gov Crothers alfl alflright a1l1rlght al1right
right rightLest rlghtLest rightLest
Lest we forget Rah for Gfllett GfllettNo GtuetUNo GlUettiNo
No doubt Mr Roosevelt has a few
words of advice for this country sug ¬
gests gest the Baltimore American There is isconsiderable Iscouldarabl isconsiderable
considerable doubt about bout the few end endof endof
of the suggestion perhaps perhapsDe perhapsDc j jDe
De Wolf Hopper says he has recited
Casey at the Bat for the last time
Fine One may applaud Mr Hopper H Hoppernow pper ppernow
now and not be afraid Casey at the
Bat will be the answer answerThe answerThe answerThe
The greatest unconscious unconsclou optimist in
the world is the June bridegroom who
Imagines he is going to be noticed at the the
Uncle Sam is
something of a pro ¬
gressive citizen after all Already he h is
thinking of experimenting in rural mall
delivery deUveryby by airship airshipRah airshipRah atrshlpRah
Rah Rah Rah T R indeed indeedI IndeedThe IndedITIme
I The Houston Post of Wednesday last
carried n eloquent
on c The
F Folly olly of submission No you are arewrong areTOng arerong
wrong w TOng There wag not one word in It Itabout Itabout Itout
a about ab out those redheaded widows widowsIt widowsIt
It seems that at we we nmat either extermi exterminate exterminate extermiate ¬
n nate ate the house fly or educate it to wipe wipeits wlpaitS wipes
Ith n its itS It s feet carefully caretul > before entering enterln the thehouse thehouse theouse
h house houseEleven houseEleven ouse ouseEleven
Eleven billion telephone connections connectionswere connectionswere connectionsere
were w ere made In the United States during duringthe duringthe duringe
t the th e year 1907 We shudder to think of ofthe ofthe ofe
t the th e incidental profanity the securing of ofthese ofthese ofese
t these th ese connections Involved InvolvedIt >
It must Jar good Deacon Rockefeller Rockefellersomewhat Rockefel1ersomewhat Rockefelleromewhat
somewhat s to note that Congress is about aboutto aboutto aboutadjourn
to adjourn without Having realized the thevirtues thovirtues theIrtues
virtues v of his proposed steen million dol dollar dollar dolphilanthropy ¬
j lar la philanthropy philanthropyIf
If Messrs Jeffries and Johnson should shouldquit shouldquit
quit q 5 uit this country countr in disgust and forever foreverwe foreverwe forevere
we w e believe the disgust would myould ould be confined confinedall confinedall confinedll
all a ll but exclusively exclusl ly to themselves themselvesIt
It is but fair nlr to say of the new post postmaster postmaster postaster ¬
master m aster at Augusta Ga however that it itwas Itwas itas
was w as his fine golf playing rather than his hisprowess hisprowess hisrowess
prowess p rowess at penny ante that won won him himmuch himmuch himuch
much m uch official favor favorAs favorAs favorAs
As yet et no one has thought to sug suggest suggest sugoat ¬
gest g oat a speed limit for aeroplanes This Thisshould Thisshould Thishould
should s appeal to the fiends for fast go goingand goIngand gongand
ingand l doubtless s It will willNaturally wmaturnlly willNaturally
Naturally aturnlly some Interest attaches to the thethought thethought thethought
thought Is this Mr Sidney Blebars on onor onor onr
or o r off day in tho United States Senate SenateWhat SonateWhat SenateWhat
What Is a worse nuisance than the thefellow theoUow theollow
fellow f ollow without a programras programmeD inquires inquiresAbe JnqulresAba inquiresAbe
Abe Martin Well there Is the fellow fellowwho fellowwho fellowwho
who parrots the performers as the show showprogresSOfJ showrogresses
progresses progressesSenator progresSOfJS p rogressesSmator
Senator S nator Taliaferro must sometimes feel feelthat feelthat feelhat
that t hat the
protected pineapple Is an un ungrateful ungrateful ungrateful ¬
grateful institution institutionThe tn1UtutfonThe institutionThe
The Hon Nicholas Longworth Lonswort1 has hasplaced hasplaced liesplaced
placed the Ohio governorship definitely definitelyon detlnltel detlnltelon
on O fl notice that It need not rush around aroundsoaking aro nd nds L Leeking
soaking s king to devour him himOur himOur himOur
Our Idea of fabulous wealth Is 1 what t
New Yorks bromo seltzer receipts will witotal
total t otal tomorrow tomorrowCHAT tomprrowCHAT toniprrowCHAT
A icTv ew Political Party
lrom F m theKanws t the1Cae KaRIH
Sty Tirss TirssThere T1 Tix TixThae M MTltaa
There is 1sa1rady already a a sew palitieaLjparty poitt4ealart In America Americaalthough Amerl Aumuicalthough
although it has no MOM or ercattUattoc ercattUattocMr oraslzacrMr iItuUor1lr
Mr Finchotfl Problem ProblemFrom ProblemFrom ProblemFrom
From the Louisville OtwrkrJounwl OtwrkrJounwlSfcaH Owri < riJosmaI riJosmaIShalt JOIIIMl JOIIIMlSMII
SfcaH the Mentis tersMe II TIM th Ute cowrtiy uMiy or the me
try gwoni gw itaelft Itself MEB Mr Ir PlaefcaL Th fie blare Is Isa iJa isa
a mystery mnsI nasa4ved the pest ps k history weB It kmwo kmwoWould InteImWoul keewuWould
Would Woul Be Senimtlonnl Flight FlightFiera FlightFXM1 FlightFree
Free the Ka Kuaq n Cia Star StarU StarIt Starit
It fa about time a SwiUwra Kaatas editor mjs s
far oomo town to put up a prime far that aviation
flight frem m WaaefegtaB D Q Q < J te Daartffle IH IHA IN INA 10A
A Parallel Case CaseFrem CasePreal
Frem the AUaoU Georgian GeorgianIIMBrtt GeorgIanliOseti I I I101110ic
IIMBrtt is said to bo is the poeitiM u of the hove hovewife bnamewife I
wife who camot do me fcalUtaff kaI becaese she has sa I
to speed her toe ipaakicg Ieg UM btMw btMwA twA b4eaA
A Bridge of Cy C Perhaps PcrhnpnFrom PcrhnpIIln Perhapso
From o Ole Boston Trtwoript TrtworiptThe Traa5crlptn TraavaiijThe
The dtetectk of betes the tallest ma ag in the ta
Howe long enjoyed by GaasnsaiBMi a Of cy Solto Soltowy Sub Subof
wy of New ew HfuafwhJre lre te said to be menaced euoed by b
Cy Qmmincs of Maryland IIZaUd who Is te the Md MdOB itIdOR dd ddou
OB the Deatocrade ticket tleiet sad MIMR aauros m sir feet f tt Ins Insand I IaRd hoawl
and a half lathe hleltea Their combtoed Wsed feagili would wouldmake wOlldmake wouldnake
make quite a a bridge of Cn OJJ Ci
j Prayer of a Hopeful Democrat DemocratFran DemqcrntFrt DemocratFr
Fran Fr the Houston P Pit Pito st
0 Lard BOW that tbs eretytWeg M Is 1 ceralng wr 0IIrIJUlI sr ww c9rtrro
purge > cary Deawcntte MM I ef hot air a and a rata ratagtery vaingbrT
gtery and a d fcwxt targe iattaHmapsa ua of CRUMB KBBJ
te CTWT Dswcratie D erafam ae ad Md pet petLed reaeabcr
L Lord S oar PTCWBKB te auto took 6f t tmrcdret 1IIrUi iste1ve just justwhea JINtwkca juelwhen
when w we tare e the worM w M by b tl the taft and a L dews
bill paH aid KO that t lt we dtnt t get et in bad this thkA
time timeA
A Coming Comln Statesman StateniuunFrem StateAmnnFm StatesmanFroa
Frem OK Ode cw cwTeacherBobb C 50 Trttmae TrttmaeTeacher TxiaTeacherBobby
Teacher TeacherBobb TeacherBobby Bobby you wars not at school schoolyesterday schoolyesterday schoolyesterday
yesterday yesterdayBobby yesterdayDobbYNope yesterdayBobbyNope
Bobby DobbYNope Nope I was paired wit Skimpy
Our OurMotto Motto If IIau you tee ireitinThe it in The B BStick Bit BitStick Bigd
Stick d It itnt oeceturily nccena l10 l10WELCOME so soWELCOME soWELCOME
U A hwadred Uwwajid theel alsd welcomes wekom I Icoold JeoWd Iroeld
coold wteft wteftAnd itepAnd wrepAnd
And I ewM kvgh I am It right t and andhary andMa1J andlaw
law wetexae wetexaeA w wA
A car C1UIe awe begin at every net of his bisheart hisJiert hisThat
heart heartThat JiertTbt
That is not glad to sec thee tbeeSkats theelSha theeShstL
Skats Sha b Coriaianm act 2 2 sc ec 1 1So 1 1So 1So
So far Shakespwire but what whatwould whatwo1d at atwomd
would th the other floats do today todl if ifthey tth ifthvr
they th were present to welcome Teddy Teddyhornet Teddthomer Teddyhome
hornet Let us quote some of them themiMRS themlUnS thetaMRS
There ts BO one beside thee and no noone noCllte noone
one above thee theeThou titreThou theeThou
Thou sUadwt thee aJ as the shore shorebell ahorebeU shorebell
bell it rings ringsAnd rtRgJADd rings4nd
And my words that would praise praisethee prahethee praisethee
thee are impotent things thingsFor tJdll tJdllFor thinjuFor
For new can expreac thee though thoughall tItou tItouall thougheli
all should Ml approve thee tbeeWe tbteWe theeWe
We love tljee U so Teddy we emily ralycan In11Tcan emilyInn
can love thee theaTENNYSON U1eeTEXSYSOX theeTENNYSON
Sunrise and morning star starJoy sterJay starJay
Jay in the lastf laa of the free freeAd free1M freetd
Ad let there be no loafing at a the thebar tlI tlII thebat
bar barTeddys I batTeddys X XTcddJs
Teddys coma horns by sea seaOh ua uaOh seaOh
Oh stop that tide that makes yea yeastagger voulUiJ8r youstagger
stagger so soYoure 69oure soYoure
Youre oure fall ef beer and foamList feamLbtto foam teamMat
Lbtto List to the tumult tamultj thus jwll U really rosilyTeddy
knew knewTeddy W WTeddy
Teddy is at MIni fcwneJ MIniJ hem
And this I know that every law lawThat JawThat lawThat
That malefactors maIefact rs ban banMust b1nMust banMust
Must be enforced e OICId with an Iran jaw jawAnd jawAnd 3evAnd
And a coat ct of o Attic Ane tan tanAnd tn tnAn tanAnd
And An u our or aw aws mast be b enforced enforcedWe eo forceia forceiaWe
We wetesme we back bd the te Man ManI Ma MaI ManI
I know not nt whether wheer laws be b right rightOr rightOr
Or whether laws W5 be b wring wrengIt wringIt 1 rgt rgtOr
It I is I not law lW but bt Teddys Teys migh mighI mh mhI tU1g4
I celebrate ccbrt In i song songOur ang angOu songOur
Our Ou Teddy Tedrwos Teddywhos whos been be gone aoe aoeear a ayear a ayear
year yearA yearA ear
A year was far too long
His BI sensibilities sensbite are a so o acute acuteNo acte sontoNo
No 10 fear of being sHeaocukes Ueltb4nake him himmute himmute himmute
Welcome gave they then to Teddy TeddyWelcome T TeddyWeloume dy dyWelcome
Welcome thrice t to Bwana Tumbo TnmboShining Tumboblntng Tumbo1llning
Shining teeth the mighty hunter hunterBack hunterBack hunteBack
Back he came from dreadful Jun Jungles JungC3 jungins ¬
gins glesFresh gC3Fnsh ginsFresh
Fresh escaped ped from kiss of Kaiser KaiserFresh KaiserFren EatserFredi
Fresh fran lecturing Egyptians EgyptiansFresh gypUansFresh EgypuaaFresh
Fresh from weariog wearl gowns ef pur purple purple wjr wjrpie ¬
ple pleBy pleBy pieBy
By the bonks of Cam and thus OxusAll OmsAIl thusAll
All the tb Todd was there to meet meetbim meethim meethim
him bimAll himAU himAll
All that to but nature fakers fakersAnd fatersAnd fak fakAnd
And tho dub called ca d A talas talasAad ani aniArid Jl1as Jl1asAnd
Arid And Marl Btcrey 8tare3Ian StcrY1AflThese lanShing water waterThese waterTb
These Tb alone did fail to greet him himBwana 111mBn imimBwamia
Bwana TunAomighty Easter 5ste atez
The graduate is hard to guess guessThe guessl guesSThe
l The fact Is very er plain plainShe plainShe plainShe
She wears a thousanddollar dress dressYet dressYet dressYet
Yet lugs a daisy chain chainYoud chainYoud chainYoud
Youd think with such a fine array arrayThat arrayThat arrayThat
That she would hardly deign deignTo deignTo deignTo
To go through graduation day dayWithout dayWithout dayWithout
Without an orchid chain chainIf chainIf chainIt
If daisy chains are good enough enoughWhy eno1lhWhy onoghWhy
Why cant she he wear a dress dressThats dressl1at9 dressThats
Thats l1at9 made of Inexpensive stuff JitutrShes stuffShes stuffShes
Shes very hard to guess guessToo gUessToo gUdSToo
Too Prosaic ProsaicThen ProanleThen ProsaicThen
Then my work wont suit suitNo 5n1t1 5n1t1o suitsaid
No o said the publisher You ought oughtcircus oughtto oughto
to t o Jhave sufficient Jmaafnatlon to write writeollCUs write1tCU
circus O 1tCU ads but not book notices noticesThe noticesTlae noticesThe
The Refugees RefugeesNow RefugeclINow RefugeesNow
Now stranger it Isnt etiquette In InFrozen i iFr02en
Frozen Dog to ask a man why he oame oamehere oamehere camehere
here hereI 0 0I
I know all about that Its the same sameway sameway sameway
way In Paris ParisJuftt ParisJuat ParisJust
Just Out of College CollegeMy CollegeMyboy
My Myboy boy feels competent to carry oa OatT the theworld th thworld thwOrld i
world on his shoulders shouldersMine shoulders11lno shouldersMine
Mine feels competent to juggle It ItA ItA ItA
A Continuous Downpour DownpourInto DownpourInto DownpourInto
Into each life some rain must fall fallSo fallSo fallSo
So runs the rune runeBut runeBut runeBut
But why must mankind get it all allIn aUIn allIn
In June
l lAn
An Old Ol Grouch GrouchSo GrouchSo GrouchSo
So you dont care for the peekaboo peekaboostyles peekaboostlC3 I Istyles
styles stylesI stylesIdo 7 7Ido
I Ido do not notWhat notWhat notWhat
What do you think a kIn girl ought to towear1 towear t twear
wear1 wear1Clothes wear
wearClethea Clothes
Fair Enough EnoughWe EnouJbWe
We want a library lIbra and an endowment endowmentfund endowmentfund endowmenfund t
fund fundAnd
And what will your town contribute contributeThe CfntrJbutoThe contribute contributeThe
The necessary noce sary officials to run It ItEarly ItEarl ItEarly
Early Earl Struggles StrugglesHo StruggleHe StrugglesHo
Ho alludes to himself constantly as a aselfmade aselfmade aselfmade
selfmade man manYos manYos manYos
Yos once when he was about a1H > ut fifteen fifteenho ntt6enho liftoenho
ho sold papers for two days daysHE daysHE
Prom the Baltimore S su suNo isoo ta taNo
No o one onen need Ed bo surprised V the Ut At Atlantic Atlantic Atlantle ¬
lantic should indulge IndaJ in a tidal wave waveFrwn waveFrem waveFrom
From the t e Beeton HecaM neraWUnder HecaMUnder 11ore 11oreUnder
Under what Jat official title will Col Bowed Bowedvolt RtKe6velt Reesevolt
volt take up direction of the fight against againstthe agalrstthe againstthe
the railroads on his return General is ishardly hshardt ishardly
hardly largo enough enoughFrom onoushFtGm enoughFrom
From the Omaha Bee BeeIs BeeIs BeeIs
Is Roosevelts popularity waning waningasks Winingneks waningasks
asks a Democratic paper It looks like likeit Uke1t likeit
it with Ith the whole country on tiptoe tlptoapeering tIptoopeering I Ipeering
peering over the New York skyline to togat toSit toget
Sit a glimpse of his coming comingI comtn comtnFrom esmtngFrom
I From the Philadelphia P1alkdllllidaIt TafefiMph TafefiMphIf Ta4IsspIt
It the baby Isnt well write Tlte to Roose Roosevelt Roosevelt Reesevolt ¬
velt if you fear the th Ate te of 1 write to toRoosevelt toRooseelt toRoosevelt
Roosevelt If the skys 1Iky no longer blue blue If Ifyour ItJOur Ifyour
your luck is up the flue Au and you dont dontknow dDntknow dontknow
know what to do write to Roosevelt RooeevaJLFrom Reo Rooseveltflomn nelt neltFrom
From tha be KIBMB City CU Star StarIn sarIn StarIn
In New York R IJO policemen have been beenassigned beooassigned besoassigned
assigned to guard Mr Roosevelt which whichin whichin whichin
in view of his eminent capacity to take takecare tak takcare taktcare
care of himself probably will be set sufilciont 8lCficlont setflclont
ilciont ilciontFrom flclontFmm
From the New mr T lerk rk Pne PneThe PtaH PtaHThe
The real recaption committee which whichwill WIIlckwill Whichwill
will be waiting for Mr Roosevelt will willnot willnot I Inot
not wear badges bad BB and medals and will willnot wl1lnot i inot
not have choice Ice seats eats on the offi oJSalal oJSalalstands lat latstandsthe I Istandsthe
stands standsthe the American public pttWteXot pftbIlcSot publicNot
Sot For Fnr Astray AstrnyFTBK AstrnTPrOM AstrayFre
PrOM Fre Uptfacotts UptfacottsSay IJIIfi UiplucottsSay t tSa
Say Sa paw Queried ctuell uericd little Sylvester SylvesterSnodgrass SYlv ylveete ylveeteSnodgyass 6t6r 6t6rSnodgrass
Snodgrass uWats wafs a test case caseA caseA caseA
A test cage my son replied Snod Snodgrass SnodgraSE Stiedgrass
grass sr is a case brought In court to te I
decide whether theres enough In it to te
Justify the lawyers in working up simi ¬
lar cases a
433 4 X a m mUr Mr Roosevelt ROO5 telt will arise arle and take takoan an icewater
bath bathS
5 a Ie m mWill Will bank the flees tIrest of the Kalserin Augusta Auguste Vie
toria and lecture the stokers stokes7G
745 7 a m mW11l Will deliver a sermon to the yasessea pauengexsS m
8 a L BL mWill Will swim ashore ashoreS
830 S a Ie m mDried Dried off o at the aquarium
9 a ra mRmmT3 Reviews the water fleet
10 a a m mneT1 mIterlws Uerifws 1 the erttl erttHn noi in the BsllisgerPinchofc case caseII
11 a a m mShakes Shakes bakell hands with Mayor rlllW GajrDor Or who goes at
once to tha hospital
12 nwn noonLuncbc Lunches off elephant steak and buckwheat takes He
will pronounce them bully
1 p m mDons Dora a a khaki nnlffrm unUrxn slightly soiled pats on
Spanish SpU sh war medals and greets his Rough Riders Issues the
order of the day to his men that t at he is to be called csUedmloner colonel
no longer but doctor of laws
2 to 4 p Po m mottt mCorrcapondenns Correspondence IlOndence
4 to 430 30 p Po mR mRead ads extracts oxtn ts from the pigjkin pf kiD library
5 p Po m mTakes Takes a ting machine far Oyster Bay
The tumult and the th shouting dies diesThe die diesThe
The kings k ngs and captains left be behind behind behind ¬
hind hindThe hindThe hindThe
The game I killed for sacrifice sacrificeI
I was cruel only to be kind kindHero tlRdHere kindBore
Hero I disdain the Victors tletor wreath wreathNo meathXo
No laurels pray < my brows to tofrrt tofrrl tofret
fret frrtI frrlI fretI
I take tho Big Stick from its itssheath Itaaheath Itssheath
sheath sheathI
I have hn it yet yetI I hate it yet yetROBERT yetROBERT ct ctRODERT
One who never turned hU back but butmarched butmarched butmarchtd
marched breast forward i
Never N Tcr doubted clouds would wouldbreak wouldbreak tOJ1dbmlr
break breakHeld bmlrHt1d breakReid
Held wa r fall to rUe are Tan Tanquisued Tanquhbed Tanniulabed
quisued to fight better
BUep to wakeCOLERIDGE wake vekelCOLERIDGE ake akeCOLERIDGE
He hnnteth best b beit t who kitleth best bestAll bestAll Jt JtAU
All game both great reat and snullt small smallAnd n nAnd
And hell go back and 5 get et t the rest restIf restIt restIt
It the Smithsonumi nuthsonlanll take em all aUr
Fresh from W hIs triumphs all the theworlds theworld U 15 15worlds
worlds world his school schoolRe ChaolHe schoolHe
He has terae ome back bscJcat at last to show showus showus she if ifUI
us how Ji to rule mleHe ruleHo nilelie
He smiles and shows hi hh teeth That Thatpensive T1atpensive Th at atpenstis
pensive frown frownbut frownII
II but to match with grace his ii I Idoctors
doctors gown gownThe irIWnne a aThe
The crowds so pjjpudly pud1y hail their thc ir
longlost chief chiefFresh chief chiefPresh
Fresh from Egyptian EIm > Uan stews and andAnd andta am 11 11English
ta English Uth beef beefAnd
And stfll they gazed and still Sti1Itt1r Sti1Itt1rwopder Uir Uirwander th thvender ir
wander grew grewThat QTeWThat grewThat
That one small head should carry carryall car ry ryall
all he hIn knew knewR hone honeU
And Uds be the Terse ye sing for forme forme or orIns r
me meI me meI InsI
I have came back horns hom where whereought I Iought 1ought
ought to be beHomo beHomEt beRune
Homo is the th stoker home from tha thaAnd thJIe ii te teAnd 3
Ie IeAnd
And the hunter bom home from ViEt Oiefcffl ViEtkin tJ me meklU t
The Battle of Waterloo WaterlooJu June le 18
When William IV of England was lying 1 1on
I on his deathbed at Windsor Wln sor Castle the thefiring thefiring
firing for the anniversary of Waterloo Waterlootook
took place and on his inquiring and andlearning andlearning i
learning the cause he breathed out faint faintly faintly faintWi ¬
ly Wi It was a groat day for England EnglandWhen EnglandWhen II IIWhen
When Napoleon recovered his throne at atParis atParis atParis
Paris on March 15 he could only onl rally rallyunder rallyunder rallyunder
under his banner about 200000 men to op ¬
pose nearly a million of troops which the theallied theallied theallied
allied sovereigns were wer ready to muster musteragainst mutteragainst musteragainst
against him His first business was to tosustain tosustain tosustain
sustain the united attack of the British Britishand DrlUhand Britishand
and Prussians posted in the Netherlands Netherlandsand Netherlandsand Netherlandsand
and it was wa his obvious policy to make an anattack anattack anattack
attack on these himself before any others otherscould otherscould otherscould
could comejup comemp to their assistance assistanceHis asattunceHIs assIstanceHis
His rapid advance at the beginning of
June before the English and Prussian Prussiancommanders PrusafanQommanders Prussiancommanders
commanders were aware of his having
left Paris his quick and brilliant as assaults 8Wcmlts assaults ¬
saults on the separate bodies 1rodl l of Prima Prussians Primaattins ¬
sians and British at Llgny and Quatre
Bras on the 16th were movements mark marked markGd ¬
ed by all his brilliant military genius
And even when on June 18 18 1815 he com commonced cornmanced 1
monced the great battle of Waterloo with within
boUt the advantage still remained to him
in the divided tPOSltfOns positions of his double doubleenemy doubleanem doubleenemy
enemy anem giving him h m the power of bringing
his whole host
concentratedly upon one oneof oneof oneof
of theirs thus
neutralizing to some ex ¬
tent their largely superior forces tore And
beyond be ond a doubt through the superior superiorskill superiorskill
skill which he showed in this as well as
the wonderful gallantry of the soldiery
the victory at Waterloo ought to have
been Iris hieThere hl hlThere IrisThere
There was Just one obstacle ob tao1e and it was was
decisive decisivethe the British infantry stood In
their squares Immovable upon the plains plainsuntil pJ plainsuntil Jns Jnsuntil
until the afternoon when the arrival of
the Prussians gave their side the superi superiority ¬
ority It is unnecessary unneceesar to repeat de ¬
tails taU which have been told In a hundred hundredchronicles hundredchronlcl08 hundredchronicles
chronicles Enough that that evening
Homecoming Receptions of Grant Grantnnil Grnntnnll Grantand
and Roosevelt Compared ComparedFa CompnredJ ComparedPasm
Fa J Ute lit New York Tribimt TribimtThirty TribncThirty ThbseueThirty
Thirty years ears three months and five fivedays fivedays
days ago San Francisco decorated with
flags fi s flowers and lanterns awaited in inexcitement Inox Inoxettemnent
excitement ox tement and ImpatIenco tir arrival arrivalof alTh1Llof arrivalof
of an exPresident exPre ld t of the United States Statesreturning Stateareturning Statesreturning
returning from the grand tour Today Todayon T TOdayon da daOn
on the opposite side of the continent continentNew conUneatNew continentNew
New York stands ready read to give a similar elmftargreeting mUal mUalg1Geting
greeting to our only onl other touring ex exPresident oxPresident
President San Franciscans knew an ananxiety ananxiety
anxiety however which we of today todayneed todayneed todayneed
need not feel They had no Idea on onwhich onwhich onwhIch
which one of o four or live days to expect
the vessel vO fel which bore the groat man
home Therefore they got everything ccrytblnsrMdY
ready for the first possible day and then thenrepaired thenfeparod thenrepaired
repaired to the bluffs to alt down and andwatch andwatch andwatch
watch the horizon We Ve of the wireless wirelessage wtrelet18age wirelessage
age know to an hour without watching watchingwhen watehlnbwben watchingwhen
when the mastheads ma theads of the big KaJserln KaJserlnwill Ja ICaiserinwill erln erlnwill
will break the sky and water wat l line off ofFire
Fire Island IslandGen IslandGen IslandGerm
Gen Grant was away from his home homeshores bom bomshores hornsshores
shores for two years and four months monthsCol monlhsCoI
Col Roosevelt has given himself only
fifteen months urO rest re t Grant visited visitednearly vlaltednetlrly visitednearly
nearly thirty different nations ROOM Roosevelt ROOMvelt Reesevolt ¬
velt only onl a dozen The same motto an answers AJIwers answore ¬
swore wers for both of them themLet Let us u have havepeace ha hapeacealthough havepeacealthough
peace peacealthough although both wore warriors warriorsGrant warriorsGrant
Grant was received throughout the world worldrather worldrsther worldrather
rather as a soldier than as an xPreei exPreeldent xPreeident xPre81dent
dent In fact an Interesting editorial editorialpublished editorialpubllabed editorialpublished
published at that time in one of the
leading newspapers nowspn s of America contained
this thl sentence No mere exPresident of ofthe ofthe ofthe
the United States regarded in his ca capacity 08Mclt onpacity ¬
pacity Mclt as a a civil ruler could have called calledforth calledforth calledforth
forth the receptions tendered to Grant Grantabroad Grantabroad I Iabroad
abroad It was his brilliant military m ltary re renown re renown ¬
nown Yet it has been in his capacity capacityas capadt r
as a former civil ruler that Theodore TheodoreRoosevelt TbeodoreReosovolt TheodoreRoosevelt I
Roosevelt has been received receivedwhich which per perhaps ¬
haps shows the advance of the Untied UntiedStates UnItedStates UnitocStates perI I
States in world esteem esteemDomestic esteemDomestic esteemDomestic
Domestic Economy EconomyFrwn EconomyPntm EconomyPreen
Preen th tM BWOB TrauscrJpt TrauscrJptMy TrasmscrI I IMy
My wife iCe threatened If I didnt get her hera ho hoa L I Ia
a new hat shed go home to har mother inetnerWhy mottlorUWhj motherWhy
UWhj Why didnt you lot her herHer herHer herr herrHer
Her railroad fare would cost more than thanthe thsnthe I Ithe
the hat
mid Animate I Hare E Bat t
Bdttertals J5cl1to a16 from the OnUo OuUok k
The Lttun Lett of ofS5vctwg M JlriL JlriLU ri
U BdecsttHK BrhIcr tlu the tit e Nation atioaa
How Egypt should Behave
Mo and a the Jungle JungleTha JuegleThe
Tile Ccwsenuttoa of Game
Sne or T th the Veldt VeldtAll VeldtAll eId t tAU
All of the t abort
e sue L50 Your se se ¬
lection of any y two ef th Ute stove ase 1
booM and The Big Stick for a year
for S cents cent
FOR SALE SALENineteen SALEb1etron SALENineteen
Nineteen b1etron lion skins fear elephant
tusks tt ks ISO antelope ante graded four fovrzebra fourzebra
zebra bn skulls two spotted teoptnfe
tails assorted lot of swke Kiwi
two unused photographic Alms The Theabove TIleaboTe Theabove
above are relics of th 1M 1Mdltlon Roo Jtoev Jtoevexpedition tft tftexpedition
expedition dltlon for which the Smith Smithsonian SmIthsoniAn xntth xntthsonuin ¬
sonian has no room JIak Make Iaka lHfer lHferWANTED eem eemWANTED ffor fforWANTED
An n efficient and rapid private privaterotary priyatof privateeeeetry
rotary f Cr lJ One who emu nm a apCTriter Atnl atplfrItcr
tnl tplfrItcr pCTriter riter with oath hand pre preferred ere ¬
tented femdj Jnuat must be acquainted with
African tenntaKriog Apptr T 1C 1Cesq ItLb
esq eQ LI LL D Oyster Bay after afterJune afterJUlie aftrJune
L L E n T PHANTOn P A TOn July Jill 10 l MC3 MC3Mr OOIr 1000Mr
Mr Ir L L E PlIANT PIlA T aged Ml MlArrangement 111Arra IlLAivangemnents
Arrangement Arra ment by Mr Ir Owning
hame Burial in the jungle or
b bGnu nea after Safari badbnen bad been sat salisfled sathied satisOed
isfled Xo flowersLEO ft flowers foyersLEOAuguet tren trenLEotJ
LEO LEotJ LEOAuguet Ausmt 1 133 near the Mag Maggori Maggoti IagSOrl
gori River Mr A 1 LEO > EO Flee FJsemane Plaemane Fleemane
mane and tall Xo funeral funeralstaffed funeralj funeraljIIwlftd funeralsUafted
staffed for Smithsonian SmithsonianFather SmlUaonlanFather a11 a11Fath
Father Fath r darling thou bait left ft us usBtrana usBwana usBmvana
Bwana Tumbo laid thte low lowtVe lowWe lowWe
We wont hare any meat fer sup supper 1Utper supper ¬
per perWhy perWhY I IWhr
Why oh why did you hare t to got gotFrom golFrcm go goFrcrnMrsLeoandthecub
From FrcrnMrsLeoandthecub FrcrnMrsLeoandthecubPr Mrs rs Leo and ad the Cabs CabsFT i in
FT THOX THOXAugust August 15 1 1809 on the theKapiti theKaplti theKapIti
Kapiti Plains LONG IT l lTHO lVTHON
THON THO ESQ ESQFuneral EsQFuneral EsqFuneral
Funeral bearers made him into intosoupi Into8OUP intosoup
soup Skin preserved Friends Friendsof Friendsof riendsof
of the family famU only Invited to toriew toTien toview
view Kermit funeral direster diresterAUXTV directerAU direoterAUNTi
AUXTV AU T1 LOPESeptember 2 1909 1909of 1mof 1900of
of lead poUoniRg in her fifth fifthyear strUtyear tUShyear
year widow WIdOwS of the late Water WaterBuck WaterBuck WaterBuck
Buck esq e q of Nairobi NairobiOh latrobiOb NairobiOh
Oh Aunty dear wo sorrow so
With grief rir were growing thin Uti
We just had to pump you fnll Of otlead Oflead oflead
lead leadBecausa leadecause leadBecause
Because ecause we need your skin kin
By Water Vatu Buck and the Kids KllbNOTICE KidsNOTiCE
Join the ranks now forming ua
der the leadership of our returned returnedchampion retnrnedchampion
champion Form orm your clubs For Yorrulte Forroles
rules address td H Fish JJh Washington
D C C adr
saw aw the noble and In a a large part vet veteran veteven ¬
eran army of c Napoleon retreating and anddispersing anddispersing
dispersing never to reassemble and that thatwithin thatwithin
within a month his sovereignty in France Francehad Francehad Francehad
had definitely closed closedIt closedIt closedIt
It must seem eem to his discredit that Wel Wellington Wellington Wellington ¬
lington was unaware on the evening of ofthe orthe Ofthe
the 18th that action was so near for he hewag hewas hewas
was attending a ball at Brussels This Thisshow Thisshow Thisshow
show of carelessness carelea noes was amply redeem redeemed redeemed redeemod ¬
ed by the marvelous coolness and sa sagacity sagacity saguelty ¬
gacity with which he e made all his subse stibsequent subsequent subsequest
quent arrangements and the patience patiencewith patiencewith patiencewith
with which he sustained the shock of the theenemy theenemy theenemy
enemy both at Quatre Bras on the 16th 16thand 16thand 16thand
and on the 18th in the more terrible fight fightI fightat fightat
at WAterlio From the day of Waterloo Waterloothe Waterloothe
I the nameof name o of Wellington was venerated veneratedabovo veneratedabovo
abovo that of any living IIv ng Englishman at i
home homeAccording homeAccording homeAccording
According to Alison the battle of Wa Waterloo Waterloo Va Vaterloo ¬
terloo was fought by 80000 French and
SO o guns gun guns against 67000 English Han Hanoverians HanoverfaJU Hanoverhiner ¬
overians Belgians Be IIU1 C c with 166 guns to towhich towbldt towhich
which w were r subsequently added certain
large bodies of Prussians who came in
time to tou assist in gaining the day There Therewere There1re ThereWere
were strictly but 22009 British troops on
the fleW of whom the total number
killed was 1417 and wounded 4923 The
total Iou of the allied forces on that
bloody day was 2237S of whom there therewere therewere thereWere
were killed 4171 4171On 417On 417 417On
On Juno 13 18 177 1718 1TS the British evacuated
Philadelphia On the same date in 1812 1S1
the United States declared war against
Great Britain It is the birthday of Deni Denison DenlIOn Denirnson
son Olnwtesd Olm tead the noted author and geol geologist geologist ol olo ¬
ogist o t 17811 17S Francis S Osgood poet and an I
author CwlIJL 1ilJ and Samuel Longfellow a s L
brother of f the poet who ho was himself a s L LnctoeI
ncted author as well as clergyman 1819 ISIS
It Is the tb 4ate 4at of the death of Arthur
Murphy Bhglish dramatist lBOi ISOS 1S0 Gen
Sir Thomas Tho picton 181 1815 iSlIm and William I
Coombfl novelist and comic poet 1
There is nothing in A Victorious Life
by Leonora B Haisted to interest the theaverage theaerage th C Cavenge
average reader of Action The narrative narrativeneither S
to neither entertaining nor convincing
It is a somewhat dull and
moralizing dis dissertation dlsHrtaUon dissortatlon ¬
sertation on ta t the e life of a woman oman who whorises whonae wh 0
rises from obscurity to the position of a
female preacher The process Is not no t
fraught with any extraordinary incidents incidentsand Inctaenuand I
j and the individuals are commonplace t
j Even the authors style Is uninspiring g
and inexpressibly tedious There is some ¬
thing of a mixture of the oldfashioned oldfashionedromance oIdfa bloned blonedromance d dromance
romance of the Dora Theme esehool esehoolwith 8lsehoolwith ehoc st
with th the thrills and heartthrobs left out outand outand oul
and some of the books we used to get go t
from the Sunday Sunda school library back bac it
home h wherein a moral was always un unerringly cnerrinly I Ierringly ¬
erringly pointed and the characters drift drifteel j
ed easily and uneventfully to a sanctified sanctifiedend ti
end There is a deal of preaching in this thi Es
book but scarcely anything new is said saidand saidand Eai I Iand
and the texts which give rise to these thesesermons theleHrID4t thee 0
sermons S are as old as time In life effort effet t
to create characters claaractten atmosphere and nd ac action a ¬
tion the author uthoi has failed to rise even eve
to the level of mediocrity New York Yen S
The Metropolitan stropoILtan Press PressXoteM PreSoteli PressNotea
XoteM of the he Books BooksGen DookGeca BooksGsa
Gen Basil W T Duke Dukeot of the Confederate Le
Army whose brotherInJaw was the fa famous tamous fi 5 5moan ¬
mous cavalry leader Gen John H Mor Morgan Morgan Mo r rgan ¬
gan is now in New York completing Lg
his Hemtnt Reminiscences cenees These he will willshortly wi 111 111shortly Ii Iishortly
shortly deliver to Doubleday Page
Co for publication publleaUoaArsenUu publicationArgentina
Argentina by b W H Hirst is the thenext theJu U Unext 10
next Ju t volume on the South American Americancountries Americancountrlts America La Lacountries
countries In the successful series which whk Ii
is edited by Martin Hume and in which whichvolumes wide h hvolu hvolumes
volumes volu dealing with uMeCl Mexico O Peru Peruand Peruaind
and Chile Cbn have already been published d
The book gives ve a vivid clear and
ac accurate acrurate a C Ccurate ¬
curate idea of not only the past history hlstor ry
and development dev lopment of Argentina but of
th tM political social 1A1 and commercial con co 0
dition of the country today toda of its
re resources re reaources r e eand ¬
sources and poselWIitics The illustra a ¬
tion lions are numerous and sn most excellent excellentThe exeetlentTbe excellentThe
The Putnam are about to publish pnbl lh the ii he heC
lectures delivered by exPresident Eliot Eliotof Eliot Elk Elkof C
of Harvard under the tb Larwlil Founda
tto at Kenyon College con e The volume volumewhich volumewhich velure 0 0which
which bears th the title The Future of o 1
Trade Unionism and Capitalism in a
Democracy con contahw tarns an accurate analy analysis anal anals f ¬
sis s of the paramount industrial question questionof questil n nof
of the present a question which is
com complicated cOl1 co n nplicated ¬
plicated as well as momentous and re regarding re resantinI r e egardtug ¬
garding the solution of which there Is Isnecessarily Isnoceaarily 5
necessarily a great reat diversity of opinion 1
The Mule Iule In Kanaan Knmmllcity KnmmllcityFJoa KunsnsCftyFien City CityPxew
Pxew the KMM Kste Ctt 0t7 > Star StarThe StarTbo
The dog mans mftn faithful friend has hasbeen hasbeea
been the subject of quantities of litera literature literature ¬
ture It has remained for a negro team teamster teamst teamstir ¬
stir st to proclaim the qualities of the Mis Missouri MislOUd ¬
lOUd mule and for a Kansas City Jury Juryto jur jurto
to back up the eulogy The animal that thatevoked thatovolcecl thatovoited
evoked all this sentiment was wa twenty
five years old oklo blind and tame ame He had hadbeen hadooen
been damaged by a collision with a Rock
Island train Sing Muse the wrath of
Achilles It was a mere childish out outburst outburst ¬
burst compared to the indignation of the theowner theoner theowner
owner of Qlnral Stonewall Jackson JacksonThg JacksonThe JacksonTb5
The powerful corporation was haled
Into court and Ginral Jacksons owner ownermade o ownermade nel nelInAde
made a speech reciting that while dogs dogsmay dogsrn
may rn ma come and go in a quarter of a cen century century ¬
tury a mule remains unchanged and andunchangeable andunehangeabl
unchangeable the center of the house ¬
holds affections affectionsSenator affectionsSenator affectionsSenates
Senator Vest may have his dog ex exclaimed exclaimed ¬
claimed the orator in conclusion but butag buta buta
ag a fo me give me a faithful mule muleor muleorpay or orpay
pay me the damages damagesSuch damagesSuch damagesSuch
Such an appeal who could resist Cer Certainly Certalnly ¬
tainly not a Missouri jury Were any anyof an anof
of its members from the kingdom of ofCallaway ofCanaway ofCallaway
Callaway The Th report Is silent on this thispoint thl thlpoint thispoint
point But damages to the extent of SI2 SI2were 125 125were 1
were returned Hereafter let no man manspeak manspeak manspeak
speak slightingly of the mule mulenoo muleROOlleTelt muleRoosevelt
noo Roosevelt evelt Now 00 n Poet PoetPV PoetFr PoetFrom
PV From the Sprtogftcki St Republican RepublicanThere RepabHeaoThere UernbHeoeThere
There was a certain paragraph In Mr MrRoosevelts MrRoosevelts
Roosevelts Oxford lecture which he heprobably heprobably
probably enjoyed writing more than any anyother anyother ny nyother
other in the entire production There is isa 15awIng Isa
a swing to it somewhat too uneven to tobe tobe I Ibe
be sure to warrant its serious presenta presentation presentation presdntation ¬
tion as verse yet the concluding portion portionof portionot L Lof
of the paragraph we venture to present presentin
in that form Irm by means of the simple m
device of dividing the two sentences Into Intonearly Intonoorly I
nearly equal lines each of which may ma mabe r Ir
be begun with a capital capl ll The result Is two twoctagzas twostavzas
ctagzas one of seven and the other of 01ourUnos oi
four ourUnos ourUnosIt lines linesIt linesIt
It wa was U tae distance and the desert desertRather desertRather desertRather
Rather than the Parthian Parisi horse bowman bowmanTtat oomAnTbat bowmanThat
That set bounds to Roma is the East EastAnd Hast sst sstAnd
And on the North orth her adnnceTvas curbed
B Dr the vat reaches at raarah mar lJ woodland woodlandRatber woodlandRatw woodlandRatbee
Ratber than Ute hp the I tall barbarians barbariansWho barbariansWho barbariansWho
Who dwelt therein thereinDwiag theniBThulag thereinDieting
Dieting the toes ca MUtloos ntiO of her herAM greatness greatnessAnd greatnessAmid
And until the U sword dropped from h her r withered I
MadTI hand handTip IsandThe
Tip Partnkn wat never a a menace of aggression
AM A I the Cessna 0 threatened her but butte to die dieThe dieThe
The subject was one to fire Mr Roose Roosevelt Roosevalt41 RoosevolVo ¬
velt volVo imagination for it dealt with im imperial Imp11al imp ¬
perial p rlal Homos RoIno martial supremacy suprema y her de decline decltne tiedm0 ¬
cline and faIl In
our school days some s m
boy would soon have been declaiming that thatpassage thatp85sageand tha t tpassageand
passage p85sageand and making a hit hitMatrimonial hitIntrlmol11nl hitMatrlntonini
Matrimonial Amenities AnienitleIVora AmenftlellF AmenitiesFvnm
IVora the Beaten Transcript TranscriptWife TraftCrlptWife TranscriptWife
Wife reproachfully reproQChfuIIYoq roproachZullYots You forget how howyou howyou 1101 w wyou
you once breathed your love in my m ear earand earand ca r rand
and promised that myevery myever wish should shouldbe shouldbe d dbe
be gratified gratifiedHub gratifiedHubNo gratifiedHubNo
Hub HubNo No I t dont but I wish now Id 1 fi
followed the hygienic rule of o keeping my an i
mouth shut while breathing breatblngI breath1ngi I
It Is no more more than right rlghtthat that Congress Congressshould Congresashould COngressshould
should pass a a bill granting Justice Moody Moodyof M ody odyof odyof
of the theSupr Supreme mo Court a life pension pensionsaid pensionsaid pOnsionsaid
said Fred S Williams a lawyer of New NewTork NewYork NewYork
York at the New Willard last night nightMr nightIr nightMr
Mr Ir Williams Is interested in legal busIness b bIncas bus business ¬
iness before the Department Department of Justice JusticeJustice JusticeJustice JusticeJustice
Justice Moody like other ther member members of ofthat 9f 9fthat t tthat
that august tribunal trlhunal relipaulshed a rich richpractice rkhpractice richpractice
practice for the bench During his in incumbency Incumbency Incumbency ¬
cumbency as a member of C the court hebecame hebecame he bebecame
became ill He could not prevent It it It ItIs ItIs Itis
Is therefore right and proper proper that that a pen pension Jenslon ilonsIon ¬
sion should be granted him It is right rightand rightand rightand
and proper that pensions should be grant granted granted granted ¬
ed to the widows of President to the thesoldiers thesoldiers thesoldiers
soldiers and sailors and other government governmentemployes goornmentemplo governmentemployes
employes employesThis emplo employesThis es esThis
This country Is a country where one oneman oneman oneman
man is as a good as his neighbor That is isat 15IJt isat
at least the principle at the bottom of ofour ofour ofour
our Constitution All are free and e qqual qqualThere ual ualThere ualThere
There shall be no class legislation and andthere andthere andthere
there shall be no favoritism If It Is Isright Isright 13right
right that pensions be granted to one oneIt oneIt oneit
It Is right that they th y should be granted grantedto
to all It Justice Moody Is granted a aenElon 8pension apension
pension > enElon it is no more than right that thatJohn thatJohn thatJohn
John Jones a clerk In the Treasury De Department Department Department ¬
partment who has passed the age limit limitshould lfmltshould limitshould
should be placed on the pension list It IfGen ItGen ItGen
Gen White or Admiral Brown or Corp Corpfinks CorpJinks
Jinks is placed on the pension roll when whenever whenover ben benoyer ¬
ever he is disabled or his superiors see seeIt seefit seefit
fit It to place him there thon his hi brothers brothersIn
In the Postoffice Department or any anyother anyother anyother
other civil branch of the government governmentshould governmentshould governmentshould
should be treated the same way Th Thclerks The Theclerks Theclerks
clerks and employes of the government governmentare
are just as necessary In the management managementof
of public affairs as soldiers and sailors sailorsand sanorsand sailorsand
and Judges and nd Presidential widows It Itseems ItSeems ItSeems
seems to me they are of greater service serviceto
to the country than the others othersThe othersThe othersThe
The United States in this respect Is IBreally IsreaUy isreally
really a country of classes So far as asthis asthis asthis
this pension pensionsystom5 system is concerned the thegovernment thegovernment thegovernment
government prefers a certain class to toanother toanother toanother
another which in itself JtS4J is unAmerican unAmericanas
as tfell as unjust We accuse Germany Germanyor
or England or any other monarchical monarchicalcountry monarchicalcountr monarchicalcountry
country countr of favoritism or paternalism paternall all allof allot allof
of which may ma be true In certain respects respectsIt
It is however not true go far as pen pensioning pensioning pensioning ¬
sioning their government employee Is iaconcerned Isconcerned isconcerned
concerned No matter how high or how howlow howlow howow
low l ow or in what branch of the govern government gOernment governent ¬
ment m ent service one is as good as the other otherIn oth othIn othern
It I In n the eyes of the laws of those coun countries countrIes coonries ¬
tries t If ries and they are arei all taken care of ottar so soTar soar
f Tar ar as pensions pen fone are concerned oone < ned Lets Letshave Letshave Letsave
have h ave a square deal all around aroundJohn aroundTohn ar und undJohn
John G Thurston of Honolulu Honolulu aa ex exporter exporter cxorter ¬
porter p orter and an planter pl nter who ws san at atthe attlte athe
tth the t he Raleigh last night nl ht in spoaWog of ofthe ofhe ofe
the th he e history of Hawaii said that in the theearly theearly thearly
early e arly 48 rs of the last century c tur when wbaaXng wbaaXngKamehameha King KingKamehameha KingKamebameha
Kamehameha III was as upon the throne of ofHawaii orHawall ofawaii
Hawaii H awaii the British consul Richard RichardCharlton RtehrdCharlton RIChardhariton
Charlton C hariton and Lord George Paukt c cnp cnpam p ptaln ptaln
taln t am of the British frigate Caryafort con conspired conspired conpired ¬
spired s to take advantage of tb the Internal Internaltribulations mtnltrlbulalions Internaltribulations
tribulations of the little kingdom to turn tornit turnIt turnover
it over to the British government There Thereupon Thereupon Therepon ¬
upon u pon Lord George made certain demands demandsupon dmaDdupon demandspon
upon u pon the old King which he knew could couldnever couldnever couldever
never n ever be complied with Bat he was wasbacked wubacked wasacked
backed b by his powerful frigate and the theKing theKing theKing
King had nothing to do but to yiH to tothe tothe tothe
the demands or abdicate abdleate his powers powentem powentemporarlly tem temporarily ternorartly ¬
porarily p He chose the latter course re retiring retiring reiring ¬
tiring t to the neighboring island of Maui MauiThe ilauiThe laui lauiThe
The way now seemed clear to British oc occupancy Gecupaney ocupancy ¬
cupancy c The union jack was liS run up and andall andall andall
all Haufsilan flags were destroyed dOl and it itonly Itonly itonly
only remained to acquaint cuaInt the outside outsideworld oJt outiidaworld e eworld
world with the enforced revolution and andobtain andobtaIn andobtain
obtain recognition for the new govern government government governmess ¬
ment mentA
A vessel had been be n chartered d by b an anAmerican anAmorlcan anAmerican
American firm firm but t bad not yet started startedon 1Itartedon startedon
on her voyage said Mr Thurston As AsLord AsLord AsLord
Lord Paulet was very anxious anxlousto to secure secureher secureher e tIre tIreher
her he offered to aft sand en American Americanagent Anj Americanagent fSn fSnagent
agent to England Englandlf If the owners would wouldgive wouldgive olJld olJldgive
give up the charter The Americans Americanswere AmfncaftSwere Amencanswere
were only too eager to accept a ept this offer offerfor offerfor offerfor
for they had been trying to devIse deviaplan devi 8 8plan aplan
plan for getting one of their own num number nu nub nurnto ¬
ber b to London and Washington WaInon In the themeantime themeantime themeantime
meantime the Americans Am6lIc s were not lazy lazyy
By y the dim light of a candle In the royal royaltombs roraltombs royaltombs
tombs one dark night usin using the Kings Kingscoffin Kln Kingscoma < s scoffin
coffin for a table a remarkable dora document do doramont u ument ¬
ment was drawn up giving a a young oung
American Am rlcan clerk named Marshall arshall full cre credentials cndenUals crcdentlals ¬
dentials as Ambassador to the United UnitedStates
States and England En Ian The selfexiled selfexiledKing lKifexUedKing selfexiledKing
King was wa secretly brought brought from his hisiutand hishitand hisisland
island of banishment and at midnight midnighton
on the shores of fate own loved island
Oahu he signed Marshalls credentials credentialsand eredenttalsand credentialsand
and then departed again for Maul lI Th Thacquitted Th Thplsn Theplan
plan was entirely successfuL Nriilall Nriilallacquitted lbAl1 lbAl1aequltted
acquitted himself creditably for his hisstatements hl hlstatements hlstatements
statements at Washington and London Londonprevented Lonclonprennted Londonprevented
prevented Lord George from obtaining
the recognition r ognltlon he desired The result ruultwas resultwas
was that Kamebaraena was reinstated reinstatedthe reltedthe reinstatedthe
the Hawaiian flag again took the place JIceot placeof
of the union jack and both Great ront Brit Britain BrItain Beltam
ain am and France bound themselves thems lv by a amutual amutual amutual
mutual declaration never to take tak pos possession possession
session of those islands
An American with 1lh the ordinary sense senseof SEOISeof senseof
of humor can have more fun to the thetwentyfour thetwentyfour thewentyfour
twentyfour t hours in Vienna than in any anyother aayother anyther
other o ther capital of Europe that is Is If he heuses heuses hesses
uses a his eyes said R Fred Wright Wrightof Wrightof
of Cleveland Ohio at the Arlington Arlingtonlast Arlln Arlingtonast ton tonlAst
last l ast night Mr Wright has just returned returnedfrom returnedfrom returnedrom
from f rom a prolonged period of study stlMl in inVienna InVfenna InVienna
Vienna and he talked very ery entertain entertainingly enterta enthrtainngiy n nIngly ¬
ingly i of the extraordinary customs t that thatstill thattilt at atsun
still s tilt survive from the days of old Vienna Vfannathat Viennahat f una unathat
that t hat were popularly supposed to have havepassed haveassed we wepassed
passed p assed away with the advance of modern modernprogress modernprogress modernrogress
progress progressIt progressIt p rogressIt
It Is a strange combination of the themodern themodern themodern
modern and the medieval medIevalthe the city of
Vienna said Mr Wright Think of a acity
city clt C ity of 1750000 inhabitants in whloh you youcan youcan youan
can c an buy a membership on the stack ex exchange exchange ¬
change c for 400 400 and the annual dues duesare duesare duesre
are a re only onl r 6 6The 26 26The 5 5The
The methods of business in Vienna Viennaare Viennaare Viennare
are a re obsolete They are the methods of ofover otoer ofover
over a century ago As an instance of ofthe otthe ofhe
the t he banking system I may mil tell you that thatI
I had a draft I wanted cashed and took tookit tookIt tookt
it i t to the leading bank One of the of ¬
ficials l of the bank glanced at the Wt of ofpaper ofPftper ofpaper
paper yawned and then oxamfnad mtn d me meclosely Meclosely mcclosely
closely as though suspecting 3pm sim m aril arilIntention mlIntention evilntention
Intention I on my part Finally he re remarked re remarked remarked
marked nonchalantly that ifl If I eared to tocall tocall iocall
call again in the afternoon he thought thoughthe thoUsbthe
he would be able to arrange the matter matterfor matterfor matterforme
for forme formeThere me meThere meuThere
There must be a revenue stamp affixed affiedto affixedto
to t o a draft before it can be cashed But Butwho Butwho Butwho
who would suspect the existence of an aninflexible anInfiexlble annflexible
inflexible I rule that the stamp must ba baput beput heput
put on before the draft is indorsed indorsedHowever IndorftdHowever
However If a foreigner Is unlucky unluckyenough unluckYenough unluckyenough
enough to indorse his draft before he hestamps hestamps hestamps
stamps it It he will have all sort sortf of Offi Official ornclal Officml ¬
cial red tape to go through before get getting getting ¬
ting t lng his money mone A friend of mine found foundthat MOOthat
that out They fined him 8 S for indorsing
before stamping and the remarks be bemade bemade hemade
made seemed to astonish them exceed exceedngly ¬
ingly inglyIt InglyIt i nglyIt
It Is funny to an American studying
in that town to be solemnly denied donJ d theprivilege the theprivilege theprivilege
privilege of a latchkey but that is what that
he finds himself up against If he stays staysout S stysout S Sout
out after tter 10 oclock at night he has ha to toring torIng toring
ring a bell at the barred and boltod door doorand doorndafter doorand
and ndafter after an appalling delay the hens beusbosorger hensbaserger
besorger clatters sleepily up to the other otherside otherside otherside
side of the door There he pauses USS until untilsatisfied untlsatisfied untilsatisfied
satisfied that the man on the other side sideis skitis sideis
is a legitimate resident of tbo house He Heopens Heopens Heopens
opens the door and exacts II kr kreutzer kreutzerwhich kreutzerwhich uz r rwhich
which Is his legitimate pay for opening openingthe openingthe
the door
Home Life in Kansas KansasFran KunsnFrom KansetaFrom
From the Atchison Globe GlobeWhen GlobeVhen GktheWhen
When a woman appears In iflt1l th h hark harkyard baokyard hatkyard
yard with the bed slats and pours pounfboWng pounfboWngwater foiling foilingwater boiingwater
water over them that is proof that she Is Isan Isnn isan
an entomologist entomologistJnst entomologistJust entomologistJust
Just an Good GoodFrom G00f1Prom GoodProm
Prom the Cleveland Leader LeaderChollie LtaderCholtle LeaderChollie
Chollie Spooner SpoonorJlmmy Jimmy can can you get me mea mea mea
a lock of your sisters hair hairJimmy hairJlmmrNopesh hairJimmyNope
Jimmy JlmmrNopesh JimmyNope Nope she locks her door dO r nights nightsBat tUshtBut nightsBut
But I cpv tell you where wh r she buys buy tt tt

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