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zjA&azW- J&&SZJr- &' s r - j&. -. THE WASHINGTON HERALD SATURPAYi -JUNE 6, 1914. 7 . - i ''Y . 5Me. , st.' if " v- r- ir-t- i"".W ".' r? .if-ayi, "V ' i, V" f?. " J T iT.iffi.ya -.?; "n f..v'-S1.Tt-.-fi..V r ( THE WJfcSHINGTONLHERALD 1 PUBU.1HED EVERT UOHNJXO BT ?THE WASHINGTON HERAJLD COMPANY 13X2 Sew York Avenue. Telcphea MAT BM. CUKTOIT T. BRAUTAHD. President uf Baiter. AdrerttctaK OScca. KEW YORK. J. a WUbnrdlnr. Brnnwick Building. CHICAGO. A. R--Eator. Hartford Building. ATLANTIC CITX. a K. --Abbot, Bartlett Bulldlnc. SUBSCRIPTION RATES BT CAKRIER. Dtilr and Sunday........ s cents Der month Dillr and Sunday.. IS.o par year uaur.i wiucu; ounaaj.. ........ ;j cents per raonw SUBSCRIPTION RATES BT MAnT" .....4S centa per month tlAO per year .....25 centa ner month ..........Ji.Oo per year ...sz.iu per year Mtre. Bltwf aLBwaesc, '-?-.!; i2' 4 -t- Dally and Sunday Dally and Sunday Dally, without Sunday. Dally, wlthoat Sunday. Sunday, without Dally.. Entered at the poitofflca at Washington, D. C, a second-class mall matter. 6ATURDAT, JUNE -6r I9M. Investors injhe New Haven ind their money were soon parted. " Only the lawyers, Jason, get rich by attending td other people's business. When they offer a prize for a tottering race, Huerta Will enter and win in a walk. Is Mr. Mellen fixing to go on the' lecture platform or break into the 'magazines? When long leaders fall out they never try heaping coals of fire on each others' heads. Some of those "new thought" people in New York seem to hae had wicked thoughts. The Lake Mohonk Peace Conference has been in session again, but we don't know why. yr. Hoe used to press his suit with the lady, and now she is pressing her suit against him. We understand that the Bull Moosers think the initials G O. P. stand for Greedy Old Party. What is Atlanta going to do, .now that the news value of the Frank case has been exhausted? "Dancing masters acquit the tango," s,ays a head line. Then the dancing -masters ought to be convicted. The trouble with some men is that they count on taking adantage of yesterday's opportunities tomorrow. And et Col. Roosevelt has sailed across the Gulf Stream a number of times without saying a word about it. The new painting of Uncle Joe Cannon in the Capitol is not at all lifelike. It hasn't got a cigar in its mouth. Mr Re, the Tennessee candidate for governor, has proea an inspiration to all the paragraphers in the country. t Most of the Mexican generals are so uncivilized that they ride to battle in automobiles instead of on horseback. ' . ,T-T. Of the three ibtUVpas'sed by the House" of Repr: sentatives yesterday in obedience to the President's bidding, "one4roviding lor an Interstate Trades Commission is Indorsed by the conservative busi ness men of the country, who believe it may result in benefit. The othertwo the Clayton anti-trust bill and the Raj burn bill, giving the Interstate Commerce Commission jurisdiction over the IssuV.of, railroad securities and limiting interlocking directpratcs-are condemned as dangerous and destructive by men of ability and integrity representing the interests affected. and by many of our wisest statesmen. In its present form the Clayton bill is susceptible of various inter pretations that would insure plenty of work for bench and barristerbut regarding such of its provisions as are understandable. Representative Mann, of Illinois, said: a "No" one can do business under that bill without having thepenitentiary facing him all the time. Every business transaction wilj be left liable to a criminal charge." "" - - j Unfortunately, there are many members' of, the House who believe tha't tHe penitentiary is Ihcplace for every one engaged in business, and'in casting their votes they were consistent and earnest There we other members of the party in power, however, who are sincere in their belief that the Clayton and Ray- burn bills will shower blessings upon the people, among them Representative Carlin, of Virginia, who bases his confidence on the fact that they were adopted with practical unanimity, "which shows that they contained the matters which the people. demand. legis lation upon." It is not necessary to agree with such logic to be lost in wonder and admiration for the sublime faith o.f the men who can look upon the con dition of the country after a year of similar policies and still believe that what it needs is more of them. Men who know little or nothing of business, in dustry, or commerce turn deaf ears to citizens of the highest type who have devoted their lives to their development and promotion. They prefer their, own baseless judgment, or else choose to believe that they are destined to save the country from being wrecked by men whose genius and enterprise have built it. Their creed is that when business says a thing is right it must be wrong, and vice versa. The Senate, as is always the case, may be depended upon to bring reason and a higher intelligence to bear on the important questions involved in the three measures. It is not to be imagined that it will enact the Clayton bill with amendments attached so vague in terms that they satisfy Samuel Gompers, who believes they mean one thing, and Woodrow Wilson, who believes they mean another, though Mr. Wilson approved them upon Mr. Gompers" representations. Whatever the fate of the bills, their effect will probably be too late to be felt by the time the Con gressional elections are held, five months from now; but the evil that Congresses, as well as men do, lives after them, and the country looks to the Senate to spare it, at least from another protracted contest in the courts over Clayton and Sherman laws, while business and industry halt for the verdict that shall strike their shackles off or place new ones upon them. It is a weighty responsibility a nation's industrial life that rests upon the Senate. Patriotism or par tisanship not both will shape its course. Many a man comes to realize that he doesn't know any more, than he thought his father knew when he was a 'boy. Were it not for the fact that murder, highway robbery', and 4omb throwing are daily occurrences in New York, we might express our astonishment that the London police are so helpless against the wild women, and that a suffragette successfully in vaded a court presentation and oiced her demands right at the British throne. Edison got a new idea for an airship the other day by watching a bumble bee. "Do you know," he said, "as I watched that bee I realized that a real plane, a heavier than air machine of great weight, can be built as soon as we obtain something that beats the air at the rate of 200 times a second." If Mr. Edison is coming this way, we can tip him off to a lot of real orators who expect to be in action on the Fourth. The duties of public life are becoming terribly exacting, and our statesmen are being called upon to make more and greater sacrifices than ever in the enactment of national legislation. The House of Representatives actually refused to hold a night ses sion on Thursday in spite of this touching plea by Representative Barnhart: "Unless we bold a night session tonight, we cannot take a vote before I leave. My son is going to marry a beautiful Indiana girl Saturday, and I've just got to go to the wedding." It's a cold, cruel world. "You must bear in mind that you are the cham pions of what is right and fair all around, no matter where you are, and that it is for what is right and fair, for public welfare, that you are ready to fight and not merely on the drop of a hat or upon some slight punctilio, but that you are champions of your fellow-men."" So said President Wilson to the gradu ates of the Naval Academy after he had handed them their diplomas yesterday. And it would be interest ing to know just how many of the midshipmen there were who did not instantly think of that failure to salute in accordance with our terms at Tampico and the fight that followed at Vera Cruz. Innocent Sabbath Recreation. The Presbyterian General Assembly refused to relax the ban of that church on Sunday amusements, though some of the delegates -earnestly pleaded fori the workers who have no other leisure for out-door sports except on Sunday. The effort to confine the ban to "commercialized" amusements failed and the old ban remains, as an edict of the Presbyterian Church, to be generally ignored by Presbyterians and everybody else. Out-door life to the people of the cities is now regarded as essential to health as well as happiness, and the Sabbath is as well ob served in the city as in the country, with the people attending religious services in the morning and get ting out for a hike or an automobile ride in the after noon, while the youngsters play ball or tennis or romp at will when they are free from Sunday school. Few people in this day look upon these innocent efforts to utilize a part of Sunday for recretion as reprehensible, whether the churches maintain the ban against the practice or not. The Puritan Sabbath has gone, and it will never return. There are a few people still living who look back on the Puritan Sunday with neither pleasant nor sacred memories. The Presbyterian General Assembly may believe that the church cannot modify its old decree against Sunday recreation for fear of losing its moral tone and rigid discipline, but contempt for the law is a more serious danger than the observance of reasonable and liberal law. There has not been a time in many jears when the churches were trying to exert an influ ence on political life and legislation for the moral up lift of the people as they are today. They might have great influence, too, if they were as progressive as they profess. But when those who call themselves Protest ants become mere arbitrary in their church bans than the old Mother Church, they should not be surprised if the spirit of protest rises against them, and the people go their way, without regard to the ecclesias tical decrees and look upon these as they did upon the Pope's bull against the comet. It is about 300 years since the blue laws of Con necticut were made by the old Puritan fathers, and New England people now deny that they ever existed except in historical fiction. The Presbyterian Gen eral Assembly met in Chicago in May, 1914, not in Plymouth Plantation in 1620; ahd while it did not deny the divine right of a mother to kiss her children on Sunday, it attempted to deny her the right to take her children to the park on Sunday and watch them play. 1 .- Hope Deferred for Railroads. At a meetine of the Interstate Commtrw Com mission on Tuesday Commissioner ludson C Clem- The name of Representative Caleb Powers . of Ken-eatiIsa.eve pub,;c ;$ h(jnest and minded enough to concede that the roads are entitled to reasonable profits and that the people will be will ing to pay tne rates mat will yield those profits without forcing the government to take over the roads." The agitation for an increase in rates has been going on for more than three years. Hearings on the present application to the commission began in iiuiyuuu Mat. 4 There is no decision yet nor is there anv as surance that one will be made speedily. Neither is there any certainty that the decision will give im mediate relief. There have been intimations that there will be a decision on the main principle only ana mat 11 an increase oe allowed were will lollow a prolonged discussion as to details which may post pone its effectiveness for months to come. Meanwhile Jhe losses of the railroads in operating revenue continue, ine ngures lor April, published yesterday side by side with the'report of Mr. Clem ent', remarks ngures officially compiledTiy the com mission itself show a cool drop of $1,000,000. In view, of the facts, the cheerful optimism of the com missioner Painfully 'SUerests the hone-deferrM o.4ii'rh maketh theTieart sick. Neic York. Sure - . '- tucky, seldom appears in the newspapers, and yet he must have been one of the busiest members of the House ever since he has been there. It required six teen solid pages of the Congressional Record to hold his speech quoting from his other speeches, telling what he has accomplished and what he has stood for and how his efforts have been appreciated. Repre sentative Powers is always there, too, when it comes to voting, as he shows by a series of comparisons of his and other members' records. To use his own words: "Take the case of Hon. Oscar Underwood, the majority leader, who has charge of the-Democratic ship of state- on the floor of the House and who is expected to always be present, voted only forty-eight times during the first session of the Sixty-third Con gress and missed voting twenty-four times. That was my record exactly. I voted forty-eight times and missed twenty-four times during that session." It is well tha'Mr.' Powers has taken effective measures to let his constituents know about all this. TlwrYitiwMl Spirit of IrJi- ; By AJfEWMAV," V Aataer at "The PeaataaUt." I don't exactly know why- I spent an evening with 4 ,G. B. vji. at a friend's house in Chelsea. But my friend insisted on dragging me' along in a taxi to the room which for the time being contained Mr. Shaw. - ' "'CBl S. struck-me as rather a shy and quiet man, who keeps the side of his. face toward one, and only iooks round occasionally, and then, with open, inter ested eye to discover if there is intelligence in the expression of 'his listener. In appearance he was slightly , less startling than his many caricatures; in fact,' quite mild and domesticated. I was never more impressed with any conversation in my life than with the one I am going to record. He,, began rather abruptly and wjth a sad expres sion on his face: MI don't know whether I'm glad to see you, though I've heard about you. And if you fail to be in telligent I shall be disgusted. , And suppose I am stupid, Mr. Newman, wont your intelligence be wasted? I'll answer that my selfit won't. Intelligence is the most uncommon thing in the world; and when I discover any one in possession of it I feel refreshed. People confuse in telligence with instinct. "Instinct is the sort of thing that makes a suc cessful city man or a successful whale. It leads the city man to do the right thing at the right moinent; and it leads 'the whale to absorb into its maw a regular London population of stupid little fish. Out of the water the whale would be helpless; out of the city the city man would be stranded. He could kinly become something dreadful and local, until time or an aecident removed him. "But intelligent people are like eagles who can fly where they will and see what pleases them. I need hardly tell you that the English nation is simply err- dowed with instinct. The national characteristics are strength and stupidity; and the sooner the British lion is replaced by a hippopotamus the better for British accuracy. "Go to their park and sit there on a Sunday. They will charge you a penny for a seat, because their in stinct leads them to trade upon laziness. And then look at the men, every one turned out with a lightly buttoned, braided coat and a hat jammed down at an agreed angle, with a backward tilt oer the ears. And what do they do? One set salutes one set and snubs another set; and there you are I Not a single intelli gent idea exchanged. Nothing but a rigid and animal uniformity which, of course, makes for British strength and stupidity." "And what about Ireland?" I said. "Say something about it yourself!" G. B. S. turned suddenly round and looked me full in the eyes. "Well," I began, "we have a few interesting and extremely intelligent people who are hopeless pessi mists. They are pessimists because they seem to be incapable of imagining an Irishman as a true Irish man unless he happens to be robed in the superb and dignified dress of our ancient people." The first thing," said Mr. Shaw, "an Irish Parlia ment should do is to make the wearing of English clothes a crime. Our own dress is finer than the Greek; and our civilization, when England was a cduntry of painted savages w-as equal to the Greek." "Just so; and painfully true," I continued ; J"but these pessimists declare that the Irish national spirit is expiring; and by becoming of our own free will, under home rule, a part of the British empire, the last trace of nationality will fade, and we shall hence forth be a colorless and soulless people. And they seem to think that safety lies in regarding our former oppressors with undying hatred." "Hatred can never be artificial If a nation does not hate another from the depths of its national heart. all the scolding in the world will not make it adopt that unholy attitude. But a heat wave might. Nations love and hate just like human beings. Any intelli gent idiot knows that there is sufficient race distinc tion between the Saxon and the Celt to keep them apart as much as it is desirable that they should be kept apart, without it being requisite that a permanent supply of hatred should be passed on from generation to generation. , "There is nothing in common between the English man and the Irishman. The Englishman is a senti mentalist, a slow thinker and a worshiper of this world. The Irishman is somewhat of a cjnic. acutely critical, a man of a quick wit and logical mind, and one who sets a proper value on this world, and by no means ignores the next. "The Englishman is a sentimentalist, whose acts of loyalty are gross; who worships words and becomes stupidly dignified in soul over such abstract ideas as the glorious liberty which every one enjoys where ever the Union Jack is .hoisted, that liberty which he takes care to present with great display to any people whom he has made a subject race. He feeds on phrases such as 'The empire upon which the sun never sets,' 'Britannia rules the waves.' And so he has blundered, sprawling over the earth, pressing freedom and enlightenment upon the unwilling, and never absorbing a nation, but merely successfully irri tating the refined and ancient races of Europe, and producing hatretTin the hearts of those whom he is still able to clasp through sheer strength and stu pidity. "Even Scotland, which is more loyal than the king, is rich in national spirit. A Scotsman and, of course, I exclude the Highlanders, who are a race by themselves may at times be nauseatingly prac tical and sticky with sentimentality. But he is dis tinctly a being by himself. His accent when once heard will never be forgotten; and his dialects are indestructible. The Scotsman is about as good an ex ample of that vague thing, loyalty, as could be pro duced; but call him an Englishman or try the ex periment of shouting Bannockburn! and see what will happen. Of course an unlimited supply of three commodi tiesBurns, whisky and the Bible, have assisted in forming the national character; but national charac ter is distinct from national spirit, just as a man's intellect is distinct from his soul. "And if we consider that exclusive race, the Welsh a Protestant nation, supph'ed with an Eng lish church; considered as part of England; bribed into obedience with an English baby; and presented at -more or less irregular intervals with an English Prince of Wales this nation has been considered as loyal as any part of the British empire; and yet where will you find a more clannish nation or, out side Ireland, one with a stronger national spirit? "But we are the Irish nation; we are a nation with blood upon every page of our history" e are sep arated from England by the Irish Sea. Therefore, I hardly think that an act of geographical loyalty will destroy our national spirit. But look here, I must I , SOUTH AMQUCAT NAVIES. Would Be Oar AIHea Ja Defenae of the Monroe Doctrine. The friendship' and cc-operatlon of the A. B. C powera of South America are not ot5ly sought -y the United Siatea In the diplomatic attain of the Teatem hemltphere, aa evidenced by the media tion proceedings, now In progress at Ni agara. Falls, but the Idea. that these countries may at some tune become the auiea or tne unitea amies 11 wo .Mon roe doctrine ever becomes an 'Issue In warfare. Is promoted In an active way by the naval authorities of this country. Almost simultaneously with the ac ceptance of tho mediation offer the Navy Department granted to three officers of the Brazilian navy the privilege of re ceiving Instruction in naval wariare on United States' battleships, and these offi cers will report to Admiral Badger hoard the flagship Wyoming at Vera Cruz. The Argentine Republic already has twelve naval officers aboard Amer ican shins. Chile has no officers with American shlpk at the present time, but has been represented in the recent past. Naval officers from Peru, however, are now receiving Instruction in the United States navy, while two officers In the Cuban navy are aboard battleships :u Mexican waters. Naval strategists aa well as diplomats regard the policy of training South American naval officers aboard the mod ern ships of the United as one of Increas ing wisdom and Importance, In view of the fact that three South American coun tries are equipping themselves for war fare with the most powerful type of bat tleships. The -A.. B. C. powers Argen- tlrae. Brazil and Chile possess seven hat THE OPEN. FORUM. Wrong Methods of Dealing with Pov erty and' the Worthless Element. To the Editor: It is as easy .as It is brilliant to say that "what. Is the mat ter with the. poor Is poverty." Neither Is Bernard Shaw the first enunclator of it. "The destruction of the noor fs their poverty," said the Hebrew epigram-- raaxer. What Is the matter, with poverty, that there Is no wiping It oft the face bf the earth. Is the real problem, and utthz caA of Aixraxr - i Natlpaal GoTerameat Kallore Warn Deallnar with Maalelanl Affairs. Those who are crazy for national 'own ership should consider the case of. John R. Early. He .has been pronounced a leper by the medical authorities of the District. of Columbia.) Ths,t territory is ruled by Congress, not a single member of which' Is responsible ,to Its inhabi tants. .. 1 Notwithstanding the fact that leprosy Is highly infectious; that Early has been exclusively in the custody of the Dli- trfrt anil fhat H.ttl.. nam..i.v .... . till the social economists can make that ( political Influence has any weight in" that quarar, .cany seems to nave roamed the out there la no triumph for religion. government, goodness, justice, nor truth on the planet. ' Poverty Is the one dead weight that crushes all hope of better being out of humanity, and no creature ever heartily Sana: Its nralspa vhn was not well inv from Its blighting power. It Is when tho orator. HKe Seneca, can Inscribe his eulo gies on tables of gold that he delights to do It honor, and then about all that he enunciates Is a glittering lie. Ask him to ko back to the poor man's privi leges and he will hedge on the money Is me like a political candidate. Honestly to admit that poverty Is the curse of the earth, against which all lines of re ligion, human brotherhood a.nd philan thropy should be directed. Is a grace al most unknown even to the most pro nounced laborers In such fields. Meantime the enterprlslns; manner In which Christian governments and civili zations help It on la sn edifying spec tacle In these days of loudly proclaimed worship of altruism and brotherly love as th new Ideals of religion and life. Hut most refreshing of all are the tac- tleshlps of the Dreadnought and .super- tics brought to bear in the case in some Dreadnought class. In the United Stafs ' common direction by the wise and pru country at will, to have visited many important cities and to have mingled freely with the patrons of numerous Im portant hotels and restaurants. With the return of the fugitive, it Is Interesting to note what the national government Is purposing to do with him. In any other city' In the country he would be sent to an Isolation hospital. In Washington, Congress Is proposing the appointment of a commission, the appropriation of 109,000, the construction of a leprosarium, and various other things. The national government Is all right so long as it confines its energies to na tional government. When It gets Into State, municipal, corporate. Industrial, domestic, and personal affairs It Is a shocking failure. New York World. New York Hotel Arrival. redl to The Wahlniti Htnld. fttw lork, June . Washlnxtonlans ar- nvea ana registered today as follows these are -esarded by naval authorities as seven battleships added to the Amerl can fleet In defense of the Monroe doc trine. This would be a very considerable and welcome re-enforcement to tho iiaval strength of the United States IA case of war with an important power. From a military standpoint, the training of offi cers In . the methods employed by the United States navy Is looked upon as a high essential element In the co-operation of those seven battleships with our own. Washington letter to Brooklyn Eagle. THE HAKEOWEST ATLANTIC. t- Polnt at Which Ablators Will Irrapt to Cross. Between Brazil and Guinea the Atlantic dent Here, as a certain good and great man was wont to say. is a. little story. The dally newspaper heads It thus. "Prisoner's wife will mourn alone at baby's funeral. Potter's field burial ne cessitated by poverty following incarcer ation of child's father." Then follows the pitiful tale of a woman "gaunt and shabby." who appeared at a police sta tion of a great city to beg help for the burial of her year-old baby, who died of want the previous day. "The baby and I have nearly starved ever since my hus band was arrested two months ago." she said. "I have done my best, but the baby was sick a good deal and I couldn't work steadily." And the police man remembered the young woman runs the conclusion, and that before her trou ble she was stylish and pretty. They are making a raid upon vaga bonds and thieves in that same city, have to. of course, where the ethics of loafing and looting are not up to the polite stand ard, but it might be worth while to con sider how many of the "incarcerated" are Ocean is only about l.HXt miles wide. From Newfoundland to Ireland, the nar rowest breadth north of the Equator. Is nearly twice as far. From New York to the nearest point of France is nearly three times as far. Hitherto most schemes 1 leaving wives and babies behind them to of aerial flight across the Atlantic have starve while they live on the county. It contemplated some northern route. That 'seems such a neat and Judicious way to suggested by the authorities of the San stop crime and suffering to take a bad Franclfco Exposition is by way ofor worthless husband and father off to Labrador. Greenland and Iceland. It has , live at the expense of the public, while Mariborough- Blenhelm B. Elliott. Grand G. S.-Ende. A. Hanbert. Mrs. A. Hanbert. Flanders R. O'Donnell. Navarre G. L. Rollar. J. L. -Acton. JI. R.. Martin. Park Avenue W. ResselL G. M. Mackintosh. Hoffman House B. H. Wilmer. Broadway Central J. Blron. Murray Hill- M. E. Gette. remained for the Dutch aviator. Van der Born, to mnke the first preparation to cross the ocean from continent to con tinent without stop, and he proposes to take the southern route, where the At lantic Is narrowest. Van der Born is now supervising the construction of a new type of hydroaero plane. 'When it is complete he will go to the port of Konakey, In French Guinea, whence he promises to fly to Pernambuco, Brazil. The scheme Is more plauelble than any of the other discussed trans-oceanic flights. It Is natural and sensible that the first crossing should be attempted at the narrowest place, even though the flight must be longer than any one of the stages of the Greenland route. There Is, of course, the danger of tropical air cur rents, but these are not much more to be reared than the storms of sub-Arctic regions which are suggested for the northern route. No one who has observed the progress of aviation doubts that before long the Atlantic wll be crossed by some venture. the wronged and helpless family must shift for itself. And then, of course, the man can be made to work, as he should. I ut by another brilliant provision of things his wages go to the State instead of the starving family. "Just to reverse that point In the case." said a worker among the poor in one city, "would end about the hardest cases of poverty I have encountered. Let the courts ar rest the drinking, worthless man and compel him to work, but give his wages to the worthy and suffering family and tho whole tone of life among the poor would be revolutionized." But the- price of labor for those who will work and the attitude toward good and faithful laborer Is the main point In the poverty making business, and not until some real Ideas of conscience and humanity, as well as laws of supply and demand, folor the relations of empIoer and emploe will this proliflr method of making paupers of all workers past their prime cease. There are businers men and films who rercelve even frem a financial standpoint the wisdom of pajing their some flyer. There Is no reason to main-1 good workmen enough to make them easy tain an attitude of scepticism toward the aviators of our own day, who have done so much in so brief a time, and who may do as much more within thr next few years. Cleveland Plain Dealer Morning Smiles. Even f-p. Mrs. Hiram Offen "Your recommends tions ure rather poor. I must say." Maid "Well, mum, jez weren t recom mlnded very highly to me. aythcr " Boston Transcript. What ir It Does "Do you know that whisky will take the varnish off a bar?" asked Mr. Bleaks. "Sir." answered Col Sokesby. "the chemistry of whisky does not interest me and. besides. It Is too valuable a fluid to waste In foolish experiments." Balti more Sun. nxpertrnrpd. Auto Salesman 'This Is the greatest car In the country Eleven eiperts have worked on It" Prospective Customer "The deal's off I had threo erperts working on me on the witness stand once, and I know what they did to me.' Puck. Crtifthlnsr niovr. 2.7SS more. Boston Transcript Clinnce for trenter Fame. A New- York physician claims to have discovered a harmless bichloride of mer cury tablet. Now he may try his hand at Inventing a harmless unloaded gun uetrolt hrce Press. Farmer Wnn Wild. "Hello old man! Have any luck shoot ing?" "I should say I did' I shot seventeen ducks In one day." "Were they wild?" Well no not exactly, but the farmer was. IlInniinntlnK. One gloomy day a oung countryman went to a dentist to have a tooth ex tracted. Seeing the patient's obvious nervousness, the dentist Inquired: "Would you like gas?' "Would J like gas? Of course I'd like gas." exclaimed the irate patient. "Do you think I'm going to have you yank ing out my teeth In the dark?" A Rorst of Eloqnence. This Is from Australia:' "Gentlemen. & member of this house has taken advant age of my absence to tweak my nose behind my back. I hope that the next time he abuses me behind my back like a coward he will do It to my face like a man. and not go skulking Into the thicket to assail a gentleman who Isn't' present to defend himself." A Line o Cheer Each Day o th' Year. Martha Washing ton G. Barnum. M. L. Barton. Mrs. L. B.Jen nings. Empire M. W. Conrad. J. M. Williams. Albert M. Eliott. Ansonlan D. B. GUh. IT. G. Goodman. York- J. Le R. Mack. Mrs. J. Le R. Mack. Walllck F. J. McCarthy. Aberdeen J. M. Nye. Hremltage E. R. Hendley. Merchants and buyers J. H. Boyce. 213 Fourth Avenue: S. J. Watts. G. Louis, 334 Fourth Avenue. Arrivals from Baltimore were M. De- la Vega. L. B. De la Vega. Marlborough- Blenhelm: J. J.vDumler. Grand: Mr. and Mrs. C. Gordon. Marlborough-Blenhelm: Mr. and Mrs. J. Manning. E. W. Stevens. Herald Square: Miss B. Bogge. Albe marle: E. A. Brinkley. C. A. Brock, Bel mont: Mrs. G. L. Cllne. Grand; F. Delcher. Navarre: H. L. Elchelberger, St. Denis: Miss A. Heyle. Dr. and Mrs. F. Morley. Park Avenue; Mr. and Mrs. R. W. Sears. Arlington; J. C. Weather ley, Park Avenue: C. P. Browning. Lau relton: J. P. Kelsey. Park Avenue; M. McDonnel. York; H. H. Smythe. Marlborough-Blenhelm; Mr. and Mrs. P. J. Tunsehler. York. AEMY OBDEBS "fflSTWatKniMRS:" 'Z Last Day of a Famous, New Yorif Politician. ' (Written Expressly for. The Herald.) By DR. E. J. EDWARDS. In the early winter of UTS. William A. Buckingham? then a member of the' United States Senate, and widely, known, as the war governor of Connecticut, died at his winter home in: Washington. "From my earliest childhood I bad vivid recol lections of Oor. Buckingham, who used often-'to stop me and, speak In the kindly manner which always charms chlldVen and causes them never to forget the speaker. In after yean my relations with Senator Buckingham were friendly and at one time somewhat Intimate. The Senate appointed a committee of Senators to attend the funeral cere monies, which were to take place at Sen ator Buckingham's home at Norwich, Conn. Among the members of the com mittee were Hannibal Hamlin, who was Vice President In Lincoln's first adminis tration: John Sherman, who had partici pated largely In securing the necessary legislation for financing the needs of the government at the time of the civil war. and Reuben E. Fenton. who had been twice govemor.cf New York and was at that time the colleague of Roscoe Conk llng as representative of New York 8tate In the United States Senate. It was an Impressive and most digni fied representation of the United States Senate which was escorted to the pews In the church set apart for those who were to pay final honors to Senator Buck ingham. The swarthy features and the wonderful large dark eyes and tall and erect figure of Senator Hamlin, who. In accordance with his custom, wore no overcoat, and the quick, somewhat ner vous movements of John Sherman, his yellowish hair and beard now beginning to turn gray, attracted great attention, since few of those who were in the church had ever seen either of these famous men. I was especially attracted by the ap pearance of Reuben E. Fenton. He sat absolutely still during the entire cere mony, and when the time came for de parting from the church he walked away slowly, with very deliberate step, not with any companion, but olone, al though I suppose" that arrangement was by accident. There was something indescribable about the face and manner of this poli tician who in his day was deemed the ablest man of his party In New York State. It seemed to me that he had been more profoundly Impressed by his sense of the ce-talnty of the end that awaited even great Senators than were any of his associate members of the committee. Nine years later. I met Senator Fenton and had brief opportunity to chat with mm. Me was no longer a member of the Senate. He sat In the glass-Inclosed room of the great hotel which C P. Hunt ington has erected at Newport New., looking out upon the sea. He was abso lutely motionless and his eyes seemed to peer beyond the vista of the ocean as though he viewed something that were beyond mortal sight. A sad smile passed over his lips as r greeted him and spoke of the propects. "Yes." he said, "it is a soothing prospect. It Is a good thing for any one whoso career Is about ended to come to a place wnere ne can look out upon the sea, for there are many things which will pass Mid'-hipm-in S. Naval A ademy. Rhode IxUnd. and content as to both present and fu ture. But In general It la the man who will work for the lowest wages the so called shrewd business man demand, and in many case will surrender the trained and efficient, but higher priced, emplwe to secure. America Is a rich and proud nation, jet it Is safe to say that from the Presi dent down few even of the government officials are paid what the case demands, and when It comes to private firms and emplovers the matter grows so monstrous that it might fairly be called a crime. It l no wonder that women and children In all parts of the land have been pushed out Into the dusty arena to make up the deflclences In the family man's salary. Recently a professor of political economy In a Pennsv lvanla university, declared that until the husband's salary is at iiriieL .-i I'fr wtK. ine Hiir mii!iL of necessity become a wage producer ! to West Virginia, with him That is the lowest margin upon which any man can decently sup port a home, and yet how many of the large firms and business houses average that pay for even their good workmen. however well able they are to afford It socialism ana communism. lanor trusts and unions, are shooting wide of the mark when they try to force the unfit and incompetent upon firms and employ ers, merely for the union's sake But if they could manage to secure fair treat ment of the fit. a new life and fire might run along their lines. It micht even up set the Scriptures and leave us without Congressional action abolishing the to- our blessed poor forever with us. But if bacco coupon will fall as a crushing we could manage to spare them and do blow upon the poor fellow who only needs our good deeds less to be seen of men. an honest treatment or the workman or emplove In the beginning might be bet ter than a pretentious aslum of charity for him in the end Justice, in fact, would almost do away with the necessity for! r.V.a.1. tt ........ I, ..n.tl.l au..:.-.. I.. .... ! Liiaiuj, 11 uutv 11 iuuiu ntuic 11a ovai on the globe. To be sure, the poor are not all martyrs any more than the rich are all (lends. Ingalls is right when he says. "Indolence will never have the same wage as thrift, nor ignorance the same reward as wis dom." and those who fall, "having had equal opportunity" can never lay their misfortune to the charge of those who succeed. Yet life and Its survivals might shortly dispose of such poverty, if men would cease making paupers of those who do their utmost and deserve a bet ter fate. And. perhaps, If they would simply recognize poverty aa the deadliest blight they could cast upon human life and socletj-, self-interest, if not brotherly love, might call a halt in the reckless greed and avarice which conspire and combine to "crowd the small trader Into outer darkness.." rob the workman of his hire, and, as one keen brain com putes it, send ninety-seven out of every 10O American citizens to die penniless. The time Is surely coming, remote as it may seem, when all shall recognize that a man's life consisttth not in ,the abundance of the things which he poe- sesseth, and when "sense and worth or a' the earth, shall bear the gree and a' that," Yet considering what money can do to open oportunlty. advancement, and wing even genius for Its flight. It would certainly help on the good day if men would give themselves less assidu ously to trading and moralizing "on the virtues of poverty, and study the mean ing of Johnson's famous couplet: This mournful truth I emjwhere roafou'd. blow rte worth by roTtrlr drrrrit'd, EVERETT SPRING. Second Lieut. Clarence L. Gilbert. -Coast Artillery. Corps. wm proceed to the Wal- before his mental vision." treatment. uenenu "08P,tal. " lor He was thinking of his own career. Chaplain Ivory H. B. Hendley. Coast ' k"JwJn? th' the rKa!ue dIfe 'm Artillery Corps, will proceed to the Wal- ' which he then suffered would speedily ter Reed General Hospital. D. C, for terminate it. as it did. treatment CCoprnzht. 1311. by Dr. EL J. Ednrdi. All tights Lieut. Col. Herman C. Schumm. Coast i ,. i Artillery i Corps, will proceed to Hot springs, ArK., ior treatment. Leave granted First Lieut, Charles L. Gundy, Medical Reserve Corps. May 3, Is extended two days. Leave granted First Lieut. William W. Vaughan. Medical Reserve Corps, May j. is extended two days. Leave granted First Lieut. William G. Guthrie, Medical Reserve Corps, May 3, is extenuea two aays. NAVY ORDEBS. EDNNIKG THE BAJXBOADS. Where's the president of this rail road?" asked the man who called at the general offices. 'He's down In Washington attendin" th' session o' somejeind uv an Investi gatin' committee." replied the office boy. "Where's the genersl manager?-' "He's appearin' before th' Interstate Commerce Commission." "Well. Where's the general superin tendent?" "He's at th' meetin' of th' legislature fightln" some bum new law." "Where's the head of the legal depart ment" "He's In court, tryin" a suit." "Then where Is the general passenger agent?" 'He's explain t" th' commercial trav elers why we can't -educe th" fare.' "Where's the general freight agent" Aid and Flet Engineer Staff of Com- ' 'He's gone out In th' country t' attend mander-ln-Chlef, Atlantic Reserve Fleet, a meetin o" th' grange an' tell th" farm- MWshlpman C E. Rosendah. de- er8 why we ain't got no freight cars.' tached Naval Academy. Annapolis. Md : ' "Who's runnine the blamed railroad L. Wilson, detached aIw?yT" .,..,.,. .. Annapolis. Md . to Th" newspapers an' th' legislature." i Pittsburgh Press. Commander Sumner E. W. Kittelle. to Naval War College. Newport. R. I. commander (. R. Marvel, to Naval War College. Newport. R. I. Lieut. Commander C. I Arnold, de tached Navy Yard. Puget Sound. Wash ington: to Michigan, as Gunnery Officer Lieut Commander Sinclair Gannon, to Naval Aiademy, Annapolis. Md.. June . 19H. Lieut Commander vv. R, White, de tached Utah, to Naval War College. New port. R. I Lieut. T Ji layior, aetacned Ohio, to gor (Wrltten Expressly for The Herald.) Br JOHN KE.NDMCK BANGS. IN ECLIPSE ICemrlzht. Hit) When some dark cloud athwart your way Inexorably slips. And shuts you from the light of day, Rememher mid the shadows gray The Sun and Moon themselves are prey As well to an eclipse. J And In the moment of their 111 Keep .to their paths appointed stllL Oliejlntr Orders In India. On an Indian railway tho station mas-i ter had been sternly instructed to do nothing out of the ordinary on pain or penalties wlthouT instructions from his superintendent This Is why he sent this telegram: ' "Superintendent's office, Calcutta: I Tiger on platform eating conductor. Wire instructions." From the National Monthly. Learn to Dance In Your Own Home Without an Instructor COLUMBIA Dance Instruction Records, 75c Each The One-Step Instruction, with music, and with the time counted, on one side and on the other, "Goodbye, Broadway," played by full orchestra. Record No. A1542 75 cents. The Hesitation Instruction, with music and on the other side, "Columbia Hesitation," played by full orchestra. Record No. A1543 75 cents. The Maxixe Instruction, with music and on the other side, "Florence Maxixe," played by full orchestra. Record No. A1540 75 cents. The Tango Instruction, with music and on the other side, "The Aeroplane," played by full' orches tra. Record No. A1541 75 cents. B D C C 1 G. Hepburn Wilson's nook. "Hon- to s. a a Daace the Modem Dance.' COLUMBIA ECLIPSE GRAFONOLA, $25 The Only Mahogany Talking Machine on the market of less than 30. U F. 6. SMITH PIANO CO. jwl 1217 F Street jH M A J I 'fl 'J ( ---CMrVr -" - . J: ,T"A ,v -r-?!'--L-.'J, . E-jft&.'CSS ssfca It .- -iiW. Jl.. . .v-V rv. . -i-irxm 3S vnM.-tT-v ,s &tjttTC .t, t-- --- i.pu-:?. ti." &ir3. ...- f.vsia a-vi vwi .-'-. - .-. , .