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Newspaper Page Text
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. Farmer (to a traveling tinker
and jack-of-till-trades) You re
member putting two lightning
rod.s on my barn last spring, don't
you? Well, that barn was struck
six weeks after and burned down.
Traveling Tinker Struck by
lightning? "It was." "In the day
time?" v'N, at night." "Must
haye been a dark night, wasn't
it?'' KYe.S) dark as pitch r "Lan
terns burning?" "What lan
terns?" "Don't you put lanterns
on 'em on dark nights?" "Never
heard of anything like that!"
"Well, it you don't know- enough
to keep your lightning rods show
in', don't blame me."
Pat jDoyou believe in dreams,
Mike? 'Mike 'Faith and I do.
Last night I dreamt that I was
awake, -an'' .in the mornin' my
dream came thrue.
Pint of water weighs twenty
The Same Things
"Then you never loved a wo
man in your life?"
"No, I guess not. You see, T
never had time."
- "Oh, you don't understand. Da
you mean to say that you never
had a burning sensation in the
"Well, I did once, but I stopped
A number of children from one
of the poorer parts of London,
who had been taken for a day in
the country, visited a farm, and
the farmer, who had just finished
milking, gave them all a drink off
milk. ''How do you like that?" he
asked. "Oh, it's fine!" murniured
one little chap, adding: "I only;
wish our milkman had a cow."
"Has his family got a skeleton
in its closet?
"I don't know about what tKeyF
have in the closet, bit they've got.
one in a hobble skirt.'
' Tie hired man named Job;
ftps' goto, jfieasantjob r
I he meadow gfrasa to mow
, Anc stow" it in "the mow.
At worfc he take the lead;
He doe - not fear cold lead,
Jor la he moved to tear
flom fcs. M clothing teara
I V JMSrtMr.l
( MT PANTS,