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Newspaper Page Text
every fall they start another six
months' swatting bee to nah any
"A fly you kill right now," ex
plains Dr. Crunibine"is like kill
ing several million next summer."
In Kansas they call Dr. Crum
bine "a second Doc Wiley." And
he lives up to the part, too. For
years he has been secretary and
editor of the state board of
health. He's the man who made
Kansas sellers put their baking
powder formula on- the cans ;
made them stop selling second
grade flour, as high patent; ban
ished saccharin as a sweetener or
preserver; stopped the selling of
beans and peas colored with sul
phate of copper; made them make
cider vinegar out of apples, and
made it a crime to sell ice cream
containing less than twelve per
cent butter fat.
The Kansas "healthier" . has
time, you see, between swatting
flies to slap, pound and maul
food adulterers, as well. It's his
idea.4o make Kansas the health
iest place in America for any one
but a fool adulterator to live in.
ky in a saloon at W. 20th and S.
Charles was fairly. Successful,
and was going on to the next sa
loon when he happened to catch
sight of himself in the glass :
"What ya lookin' at?" 4ie de
manded. The lips of Charles' reflection
"Huh?" demanded Charles,
"talk back at me, would ya? Now
you're gettin' inyreal bad."
Still there was no answer from,"
the figure in the mirror.
"Think your goldurned smar',
don' ya?" Charles demanded.
"Trym' to ac' haughty, huh?
Now you are going to get it."
Thereupon, Charles raised his
right fist and smashed it through
the mirrof. The glass cut an ar
tery in his wrist, and the pa'trol
wagon which arrived about 10
minutes later took Charles to-the
CHAS. WALLOPS HIMSELF
Shakespeare or some other
highbrow gink said there were
seven stages to a jag.
"We move that this be amended
to read that there are seven and
an eighth, or Charles Johnson,
Charles is a teamster when he
is working, which is every once in
so often, and last night Charles
was trying to absorb all the whis-
A banker, having a bald head,
was in the habit of wearing his
hat during business hours. Every
week a negro workman on the
railroad presented a check for his
wages, and one day as he put his
money in a greasy wallet the
banker said to him:
"Lbok here, Moses, why don't
you let sdme of that money stavj
in the bank and earn" interest'fofcl
"Oh, no boss," replied thel
darky, with a glance at the banlt-
ers hat. Tse jes afeared. You
look like you was always ready to
start off somewheres 1"