Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1949 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
POOR TEACHER ""
On one occasion, a teacher was
explaining "Lions, tigers and
even cats are beasts of prey,"
when she. heard a pupil whisper
audibly, to a feHow:
"I don't believe our cat prays,
"Why," said the teacher, over
hearing and amused, "does not
your cat pray?"
"No, ma'am; he just purrs."
"Can you tell me, then," con
tinued the teacher, in order to il
lustrate why a cat is a beast of
prey, "what it is that a cat has
that you and I Have not?"
"Yes, ma'am; it's whiskers."
Taking No Chances.
It took a shopkeeper the other
day evecy ounce, of will power he
possessed to keep from laughing
outright at ah old lady from the
country who came to his estab
lishment. She began examining
some pieces of cheap calico. She
pulled at one piece first this way,
then that, wetting it and. rubbing
it with her fingersrto try if the col
ors were fast. At last she snipped
off a piece with a pair"of scissors
and, handing it to a gawky-looking
girl of about sixteen standing
by her side, said :
"Here, 'Liza Jane, you chew
that an' see if it fades."
'Liza Jane raised it to '.her
mouth and solemnly went to
Motororist "(as he drives into
the window of a milliner's shop)
My wife wishes to buythat hat
in the corner.
HERS l$3 A 'Rve-YGAKi
r'Uil s. T ft.LM.M. i rv cw . il
-wwu -uwi nW;i Vf STORES l
TioR "&ere MffidZive .TMir6M
IT A MERE 34BY J WHY
CAHIT YOO 3?0 SO62ACS'
' I .1
NOT 'A COMPLAINT
"Look here." he said to the
' . :
groom, are you the man who pa,t
the saddle on Miss Tennie'
Yes, sir. Anything wrong,!""!
"It was loose very loose. She
naa no sooner mounted tnan tnejl
saddle slipped, and if I hadnt TPk
caught her she Would have bean
thrown to the ground. ,
"I'm very sorry, sin''
"But I dicLcatch .her,' went
the young man, meditatively.
caught her m my arms-, and
here's a dollar for vou. Tohn. Da
you suppose you coufd leave the-ftSE
girth loose when we go ndmg
I again tomorrow?