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Newspaper Page Text
would be no giddy tango-ing at
the Assembly balls, not by the
high price of meat, by golly !
When Art handed this out,
there was a great outburst of in
dignation (whatever that is) from
the sassiety debunantes. (As we
have explained before, "de
butante" is French for young-thing-trying-to
- cop - off-a-hus-band.)
But Art was firm firm as he is
in raising the price of meat and
blaming if on the cows!
But Art's firmness didn't do a
doggone bit of good. After sup
per was over, which is another
way of saying after tht cham
pagne was gotten out of the way,
those leaders of society and cor
rectors of the morals of the poor,
danced the Tango, even in the
exclusive halls of the BIackston.e.
And "the police didn't stop it!
MOSTLY COMMENT '
And now they say ticket scalp,
ers have captured the seats for
New Year's eve at the loop lob
ster palaces, and have boosted the
price. That's all right. Let 'em
tax the boobs. Soak 'em good.
Gov. Wilson is now harmon
izing the Democratic party lead
ers. Doing the same thing to the
G. O. P is what hurried Taft's
Gov. Wilson had a "restful
Christmas anyhow. A slight at
tack of the grip gave him an ex
cuse to spend the merry, merry
'day in bed. Not so the job
Perfectly safe now to do your
Christmas shopping early. But;
don't ride in the freight elevator.
Speaking of Lake Geneva and
Jack Johnson we should worry.
If a freight elevator in a de
partment store drops, and it takes
six ambulances to carry away the
injured why do you see nothing
about it in the newspapers? Is it
because the department store ad
Do you 1913 resoluting early,
and avoid the rush.
Having done your Xmas shop
ping early and thus helped the
tired clerks, you can now do your
after-Xmas bargain shopping
early and help 'em again. Every
body's doing it.
Those who had some small
change left after Christmas can
tell who to hand it to by reading
newspaper ads. The merchants
Now comes swell sassiety's an
nual drunk, and 'Arthur Burrage
Farwell's annual reform fit. We
don't think very well of either.
Cold turkey today. Turkey
soup about "Friday unless it is
THEY ALL LOVED HER
Minneapolis, Dec. 26. Mrs.
Leola Berg indicted for bigamy.
In jail. John Berg, husband No.
3, sent 5-lb. box of Christmas
candy. Union Rothe, Des Moines,
husband No. 2, sent 5-lb. box
chocolates. Wm. Pierce, hus
band No. 1, not heard from. But
Pierce is dead.
Pittsburgh. Mrs. Susan B.
Stitsel,. 100 years and 14 days old,
is dead at G. A. R. women's home.
p .TTT, mml