Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1949 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
HE TRADED r
Martin owned a large dog, but
his wife was not fond of dogs. In
fact, she detested them, and the
amount it used to eat annoyed her
all the more.
"Hang that dog!" said she one
day. "I wish you'd do something
with him get rid of him, or sell
him. What's the use of keeping
a worthless brute like that?"
"All right, my dear," said Mar
tin. "Say no more about it. I'll
get rid of him one of these days."
But Martin's wife was not to be
put off in this manner. For days
she kept on nagging about the
dog until Martin's life became un
bearable, and he was obliged to
do something to escape her
"Well, my dear," he said one
day, "I've sold Joe at last."
"Have you really? I'm so
glad," she said. "How much did
you get for him?"
"Four dollars," he responded.
"That's capital!" she cried.
"Where's the money, my love?"
"You see, dear," he replied; "I
didn't get any money. I took two
puppies at $2 apiece in exchange."
BARRED AND BARREN
What would father say? She
had fallen in love with an impe
cunious baron and the question of
his bank account versus pa was
Mother did not know much
about the matter, but dropped in
just as father and daughter were
discussing this vast problem of
ACH, soBoav hass MAn-ea?
UCH A OAINTY SOILE-D HAM!
TAKE IT AVAY, ADOcF, TO
TVt BeFOKc i
"But what is he baron of?"
For a moment father and
daughter looked at one another.
The nobleman was of German
persuasion, with a totally unpro-
11V,U..V.V.W,.V- WCWWV.. .,,
"Oh,' ejaculated father, ge
ting a happy inspiration, "he
barren of funds that's what her
And the match was declared
He I have a nervous headache'
tonight. She I've heard that
music will cure anything of
nervous origin. Shall I sing
you? He Oh, it doesn't ache
badly as that