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Newspaper Page Text
r , .
TP ( OMSS JSS AjOUDNCiS TO
T I iNntU&NZ. 30T '$ vor
14BCYX IeiR I HAF- INFLUENZA. .
4.HCfer6v'etf, But r don't Know
WAYae, trom I VyVeRe r got it.
"Histl" -whispered Paddy.
He was crouching beneath the. sign
of the " three i balls, watching alert,
and he had no ears for the pleasant
ries of his old friend. Mick.
"What's the matter, Patrick?"
iwhispered Mick anxipusly.
Paddy laid a finger on his lips.
"Have you, gone cranky?" pursued
Mick unheeding. "Tell me, Patrick.
'what Is it?" ,
"It's Tike this," whispered, Paddy.
."It's just, twelve months today I
pawned my suit, and 'I'm told in a
twelvemonth it'll run out. Never a
Word, Mick... Iimstandin' here"waiting
ito be'ready for it as it comes running
-through, the doorway."
" "t o o
George--She sings nicely, doesn't
?'he? Tom Oh, yes; when she sings
hey have to close the windows.
3i3edrge -My goodness! What- for?
ixsfpom Her voice is so sweet it draws
- FRIGHTENED HIM .
He was a sewing machine agerittif
the most aggressive type. For tyfeny
minutes the lady of the house. Had
been awaiting an opportunity tti.&ay
she already possessed one. Atjast'
he paused. Only long enough, iHpw-
ever, to thrust a card Into the lady's
hand. The bit of pasteboard "was cer
.tainly a novelty. " ;
"My name is Sellum," it read, "bf
the firm bf Blang & Company, sow
ing machine manufactufers.'ana tin
tend to prove to you that it is inad-
ness to defer purchasing one of- Btir
unequaled machines. After ab'iig
description) of the machine came-the
following: "You may plead jhafe-ydU
are unable to work a ma"chine. I will
remove that objection in'fifteenjtriin
utes, or in three lessons. Will call
" When the agent called again a. six-
foot man opened the door and bland
You're the sewing machine man,
"Yes! I called, last week, and "
- "Yes., I know," interrupted the big
mnn "Vnn dnn't lrnnw mp. T Rltfi-
pdse? My name's Bur, of Bury &
Keepem, undertakers, and I intend to
prove to you that it is madness to
defer purchasing one of our Un
The agent began to edge away.
"You may plead that you are
scarcely qualified for a coffin," the
big man went on. "I will rembve
that objection in ten seconds."
But the agent simply new from
The following conversation was re
cently overheard Jn a public billiard
Marker Would you like a earrie.
sir, with that gentleman 'over there?
Regular Customer Well, what
kind of a game does he play?
Marker Rotten game, sir.
Regular Customer All right "
What points ought I to give him?
Marker Better play him even; Bir,