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Newspaper Page Text
hViiSWR!fu,,'..uJK u, J "
WASN'T THE SAME
A man who had just bought a
motor-car, invited a small party of
friends to take a spin with him. To
Uwrf yicuua wj
Thlg4liow the car to the best advantage,
he let it go as fast as it would, and it
covered a surprising number of miles
I -in a couple of hours. Qn the way
(m back, however, dusk came on rapidly,
;ana, tnougn ine Bpeea was slower,
the certainty of taking the right turn
me was smaller. Finallv the friend
Jfrho sat with the driver whispered,
''T.iielfa wrA oya rff fVio yviA W7a, oia
k "Nonsense!" growled the owner of
.Jhe car. "This Is the same road we
Sgame out on."
L "No, it isn't!"
C ''How do yon know It Isn't?"
"Where's all the dead chickens and
laogs we left behind us?"
I . o o
Smith It was very foolish on the
part of Jones; he spent money like
water. Robinson Did ne? Then he
Ifquldated his debts!
II i i
' (bu GUESSED rT, ADOLK
BO0B" iss BER.
THE STRAIGHT TIP
The old farmer was making Ms
usual weekly call on Mrs. Wiggins. I
"P'taters Is good this mornm,',
ma'am," he said, casting an admir
ing look at the basketful he had i
"Oh, is they?" retorted Mrs. Wig
gins. "That reminds me. I wants to I
have a word with you about them
you sold me last week. How is it
that them at the bottom o' the bas
ket is so much smaller than them at
"Comes about like this," replied
old John, a knowing look on his face.
"P'taters is growin' that fast now,
that by the time I get a basketful
dug, the last ones is about twice the
size of the first!"
A FUTURE FINANCIER
"Ma," exclaimed young Teddie,
bursting into the house, "Mrs. John
son said she would give me a penny
if I told her what you said about
"I never heard of such a thing!"
answered the mother indignantly.
"You're a very good boy not to have
told! I wouldn't have her think I
even mentioned her. Here's an apple,
sonny, for being such a wise little
"I should think I am, ma! When
she showed me the penny I told her
that what you said was something
awful and worth a quarter, at least!"
NOT ANOTHER WORD
"Sir," began the young man nerv
ouslyf "I wish to ask your consent
for my marriage with your daugh
ter." "Eh?" quickly rejoined the parent
"What of jour income? Is it sufll
dent to support a wife?"
"It is," boldly returned the slightly
nettled aspirant, "and, what Is more,
it's sufficient to stand an occasional
touch from my wife's father!"
"Then she's yours, my son!"