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Newspaper Page Text
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A ' XR CHUOiaARV (SSKffTToGET
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"It's ctniouB." said Brown, "how
hcoming events cist their shadows
tefore them. 111 wager a fiver none
tof you gentlemen can guess what
Tvas me last unng played on the or
igan at the time of the fire."
K "'The Last Chord.' Bue-i?flffH
Brown shook his head.
"What was it, then?" asked the
iractical member. -
Brown got up, reached for his hat,
id went to the door. Then hr re
r "The hose!"
' 2. o o
"I am inclined to think' said a
man, "that our friend Mr. Grafton
Grabb was created on the Sabbath."
"For what reason?" "We are tnfri
that an honest man is the noblest
work of the Creator, and also that
on the seventh day the Creator rest
ed," A . J
A painter of the "impressionist"
school is now confined in a lunatic
asylum. To all persons who visit his
studio he says, "Look here; this is the
latest masterpiece of my composi
tion." They look, and see nothing
but an expanse of bare canvas. They
ask, "What does that represent?"
"That? Why, that represents the
passage of the Jews through the Red
"Beg pardon, but where is the
"It has been driven back."
"And where are the Jews?"
"They have crossed over."
"And the Egyptians?"
"Will be here directly. That's the
sort of painting I like; simple, sug
gestive, and unpretentious."
ON PAY DAY
The workman was engaged in ex
cavating operations, i. e., he was digging-
The wayfarer of the Inquisitive
turn of mind Btopped for a moment to
"My man," Baid the wayfarer at
length, "what are you digging for?"
The workman looked up.
"Money," he replied.
"Money I" ejaculated the amazed
wayfarer. "And when do you ex
pect to strike it?"
"Saturday," replied the workman.
and resumed operations.
HE HAD ODDS
Two boys who managed to be
rather unruly in school so exasperat
ed their teacher that she requested
them to remain after hours and write
their names five hundred times. They
plunged into the task. Some fifteen
minutes later one of them grew un
easy and began watching his com
panion in disgrace. Suddenly the
first one burst out with despair, and
between his sobs Said.to the teacher:
" 'Taint fair, mum! His name's
Bush, and mine's Macgillavry,'