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Newspaper Page Text
DAILY COMMENT ON
If that fight at Milwaukee tonight was a wrestling match, Gus Cans tie would be right liable to find a Chip on his shoulder before the evening was over. There is to be an eclipse of the" sun on August 24. 'Twill be no re lief from the August hot weather, however, as we'd have; to go abroad to get the benefit of the shade. A groorrf recently proposed by wireless. Wonder bow soon he will be sending out S. O. S. signals. Here's one bet that American wo men have overlooked. How care less. The women, and even the men, of Paris, are dyeing their hair to match the color of their clothes. Which leads us to ask, how about the baldheads? Judge Densmore, solicitor for the U. S. labor department, announces that the mine owners are to blame for that Michigan strike. Well, judge, what are you going to do about it? "Just as necessary to have a rifle as a union card' they are saying in that Colorado mine region. To what extent does such a feeling hold the 2,000,000 or more union men of the country? Tis announced that President Wil son's "vigorous strokes on the gob! links show his return to full health." Bully! We take it that his blasphemic powers are also fully recuperated; he's gong to need 'em in regulating the trusts. Eastern, doctor says more married folks go insane than unmarried. That's no way to .discourage the young people, doc. According to decision of Texas at torney general, a fellow can't pack booze into dry territory in his trunk. If he has to carry it under his belt, this is a staggering opinion. Caddy in Pass Christian says Pres. Wilson is a fine man, but can't play golf a little bit We.ll, there are lots of golf experts PEOPLE AND THINGS who aren't much good for anything else. AnjDnion a day keeps the doctor away, accordingto old saying. Why not eat a dozen a day and keep everybody away? An Ohio man has a skunk farm on which he makes a good living. But what's the use of living on a skunk farm? Western doctor says great variety of food is cause of most of human ills. That means we should cut out quail, lobsters, spring lamb and por terhouse steak and stick to popcorn or peanuts. Wot! BY THjTwAY Quincy, III., woman wants to sell her husband, as she prefers a cat. That might develop into quite an in dustry if permitted. Cable reports from Spain tell of a woman who presented her husband with seven daughters septuplets. Dispatches did not carry remarks hubby Tnade. Body of a man found in Dallas, Tex., had a note pinned to it reading: "Someone has killed me." There's nothing like knowing when one is dead. Some people don't. Under a new policy, French courts are deciding cases without regard to precedents. They say it beats decid ing cases without regard to sense. , A grain of radium in a Turin scien tific school has been insured for $80,000 for one year. The Portugal republic is so wobbly that Great Britain and Germany are . licking their chops over the Portu guese colonies in Africa. o o Wife Yes, we passed a resolution tonight, Prank, pledging ourselves to help to ameliorate the crying evils of today. Husband Then, for good ness' sake, Ellen, go upstairs to the twins! 1 in r-'itmmmmmmmmfmmimfr.