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! J I DOHT SEE WHY You ACT SO
-VJOlWD HlM.AlXSljt-M30 vOOONDHlMl k 'ACTUALLY. Ht. nfl(S3 Dfctw-p;rir IKpib ME ft BOOT ttSO AIjI myir- ! r THE JURY'S ACTION "When you poke a toad," said old Farmer Hornbeak, philosophically, you can't tell which way he will jump, nor how far; an' it is jest about the same way with the average jury." "That so " "Yep, For instance, in the case o Plunk Jarvis, who has jest been tried for pullinout his. brother-in-law's whiskers by the roofs in a fight, the jury discharged Plunk an fined his brother-in-law ten cents, the regular price of a "shave." The elocution teacher "was in structing a,, scholar who had insist ed upon learning a long and rather vprosy piece. "When you have fin ished the recitation," said the teach er, "bow gracefully and leave the platform on tiptoe." "On tiptoe?" asked the scholar. "Yes," answered Xhe teacher, "so as not to wake the Audience"." CtWVTtfnWC THEM5EtfS Cheer up! The calamity howlers have discovered that you are going to get all the "benefits" of Ugh pro tection, after alL They're claiming that foreign importers are taking ad vantage of our tariff reductions by adding on the difference to their sell ing prices. , First thing the high protectionist knows,, he's going to prove that high protection laws don't have any effect on anybody. If the foreign producer puts jon prices up to the protection level, he isn't competing with our home pro ducer, is he? And we're saving some of the cost of customs collection, aren't we? SLIGHTED Sandy McTavish was sitting weep-i ing at his fireside. "Ed, sandy, mon," said a neighbor, peeping in at the open window, at tracted by the sounds of woe, "what's ailin' ye?" "Oh, dear! Oh, dear!" sobbed San-' dy. "Donald McPherson's wife i3 deid." "Awheel," said the neighbor, "what o' that? She's no relation o yours, is she?" "I know she isn't," wailed Sandy, "but it jist se'ems as if everybody's gettin' a change but me." o o A JOLT! A letter brought by the postman was thinner tnan. tne bulky ones which a struggling young author usually received, and he tore it open eagerly and read: 1 Your recent letter stating that you enclose manuscript of story,, with stamps for return if not suitable, has been received. Your contributioiL is accepted." "At length!" exclaimed the young author, joyfully. But his heart seemed to sink as his eyes caught" the following: P. S. You neglected to enclose the manuscript."