The day book. [volume], March 18, 1914, NOON EDITION, Image 18

About The day book. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917

Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

                
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A "SURE CURE"
By Walter Joseph Delaney.
(Copyright by W. G. Chapman.)
"When you have a "sharp pain be
tween the solar plexis and the ob
longata thorax, look out!" bawled a
strident voice.
The tones echoed blatantly over
the village green. For over half an
hour a wandering medicine fakir had
been decanting upon his nostrums to
"The I. X. L. Sure Cure Will Protect
You."
a curious crowd who drank in his big
words and aniazing statements.
Smug, rotund, lingering on the
outskirts of the crowd, John Moore
smiled complacently to himself.
"None of that in me!" he chuckled.
"I reckon he can't sell me any of his
sugar and water humbugs."
"When you feel dizzy-headed, pal
pitation, difficulty in breathing, again
look out! They may be serious
complication. Be warned in time.
The I. X. L. Sure Cure will protect
you."
A thin dyspeptic man stepped up
and purchased a bottle, of the much
mooted elixir of life. Then, despite
some further forcible talk of the ven
der, sales went slow. He began to
traverse more explicit lines. He
painted a dismal picture of ill health.
As symptom after symptom was
named, with a proud and positive
smile John- Moore kept tab on them.
"Guess I'm a well and husky speci
men if I did have rheumatism once,"
gloated the old fellow, and was about
to remove his well fed and well satis
fied self from the vicinity, when the
medicine vender, growing desperate
at the lack of interest and investment
as to his wares and their boasted vir
tues, named new "symptoms." Then
he came to a sudden stop, indeed a
startled halt.
"There is another line of symp
toms," declared the fakir solemnly.
"They apply td fatal diseases," and
he named several cancerous dis
tresses of the human family. "What
is the preventative? The I. X. Q.
Sure Cure! Applied in time, it will
kill out the germs. But when the full
disease secures its final grip, what
then? ttadium. And what does
radium cost? Oh, iny friends! ward
off this terrible calamity with a bot
tle of my cardinal mixture. Symp
toms" he named a score and wound
up with "a prickly sensation under
the surface."
"Hah!" gasped Moore, and his
hand stole to his back. His face turn
ed white as chalk. He staggered
homeward with the hoarse, despair
ing words: "I've got it doomed!"
For two days old John Moore
neither ate nor slept. He remained
in his own room, groaning and des
perate. He had got hold of several
medical works. While the "prickly
sensation" described by the medicine
fakir was not named, the terrors of
the disease were.
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