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Newspaper Page Text
lAC t (" V3T? 'VetU.HOW AUooT ZEJOTRAI
OrOt V PAftfc.TiFTHiWUOO,HERAL&
MEANING OF THINGS
Driving ,on an outside car one day
in Killarney, as a heavy, drizzling rain
egan to fall, a passenger remarked
the driver that it looked as if thev
were in for a wet day.
VNot at all, shv" replied the jarvey.
We don't call that rain: that's only
the mountains perspirin'!" Top
Notch. . ,
SO THEN. OF COURSE
ft "If ybu were not so athletic," he
murmured, 'Td try to kiss you."
fv ''Oh. vdtf reallv mustn't." she aua-
vered. "WJiqn a. man tries to kiss me
r get so frightened that I haven't a
Kbit of strength to resist."
v ' ' o c
Returned Tourist The bombard
ments are simply terrible. Ydu have
no. idea how a church can be so com
pletely r wrecked!"
Tiendir-7es. Jt have. I was in a
choir Jghtodce, -Puck. -
LITTLE HARRY AND THE DOQ
Little Harry wanted a dog. He had
many arguments with his mother on
the subject He was sent to a near
by grocery. He was gone so long
that his mother became anxious.
Stepping to a window, she saw Harry
down the street manfully pulling on
a rope, the other end of which was
tied around the neck of a small dog.
The pup. was resisting every step
Braced on all fours, it was pulling
back with' every ounce of its small
might and barking as loudly as pos
sible. Presently Harry triumphantly en
tered the room. "Mother," he called,
"won't you let me keep this little
dog? It followed me home." Fun.
HE HAD ENOUGH
Mr. Naggs was late-in arriving for
"Well, what kept you so late?" de
manded Mrs. Naggs, her war signal
"T T atnnnnri tn mart fh hiiTlpHns "
faltered Mr. Naggs.
"The bulletins! What was on the
"Why, all about the fighting"
"Fighting, fighting!" with fine
scorn. "Don't you get enough fight
ing at home?"
"Why, yes, my dear. I guess I do,"
he responded meekly.
"Old Man Moss, our oldest inhab
itant, has a memory as keen and
bright as ever. He recalls when th'
head o' the family used ter preside
at th' Christmas-dinner with acarvin'
knife instead of a can-opener."