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Newspaper Page Text
ki 3J A? .
IN CASE IT DIDNT WORK
1 "Why-are you sitting on that hoy's
"Why, r "
l "Did I not tell you always to count
a hundred before you gave way to
passion and struck another boy?"
"Yes'm, and I'm doin' it I'm just
flittin' on his face so hell be here
when I'm done countin' the hundred."
tj o o T
j A DAINTY PORTION
j "My plate is damp," complained a
"traveler who was dinine in a Lon-
p ; ''Hush!" whispered his wife. "That
is your soup. Tney serve small jpor
tions in war time!" Top-Notch.
"How 'was your ldst cook ? "
- "She was an Irish girl who talked
lTjirkey, drank Scotch, got her Dutch
up and toofc. French leave;" Fun.
HOW SHE DID IT
"My dear Mrs. Adams, what has
been the chief source of your won
derful strength and sustenance dur
ing all these years? What do you
consider has been the real basis of
your extraordinaryvigor of mind and
body, and has been to you an unfail
ing comfort through joys and sorrows
which must come to all of God's crea
tures? Tell me, that I may pass the
secret to others and, if possible, profit
by it myself."
The good pastor waited with un
usual eagerness for the old lady's
"Victuals," she answered.
A LAWN SERMON
A suburban minister, during his
discourse one Sunday morning said:
"In each blade of grass there is a
sermon." The following day one of
his flock discovered the good man
pushing a lawn mower about, and
paused to say, "Well, parson, I'm glad
to'See you engaged in cutting your
sermons short." N. Y. World.
it o o
WAY DEY MAiE UP
THEIR . MINDS-
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