Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1943 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
n. y. everry thing dont go ak
kording to rules & a teecher ought to
know that much, hecaus everry 10
minets the teecher is talking her
head off about eckseptions to rules.
that is why i am surprised that the
principel of the astor skool would
want to make littel gorgie stay in af
ter skool and get a lot df jawing
from the principel for being so smart
yesterdy they was showing off gor-
Lf gie's class becaus the superintendent
was there & after the mas got done
t- they had to lissen to sum hot air
Swhen it was alreddy past time for
them to beat it out for home
h Tv But he tells em to watch out for
I rj safty furst & says that you must
, be awful kareful wnen you, run
1jf down the steps because you mite fall
&. hrake vour neck, and vou must
$ be kareful when you run around and
v piay Decause you mite iau ana orane
" rtniA -w rityy rr -folio TTTifrViriif Tim4inrt
v DCUUf uuuuug i.aio nuuum. uui uug
Itself, and if the fall is long enuff you
(UC UUC1 IAJ UJ.O.XVG SUU1C UJU.ii3
then he asked the kids if they un-
c him sum kweshuns.
BxV that was when gorgie' got busy &
Ousted into the game
,it the nite that falls, but it's the day
?? that brakes
m o o
Sk his capacity
Investigator (addressing a team
ster) And how many glasses of
beer do you drink in the course of
the work day?
r Teamster That depends. Some
- times J drink 20 or 30 and then again
I might drink a whole lot
j Teacher (meeting pupil) Bobby,
do you remember today's lesson?
! Why is the hyphen used in the word
, bird-cage ?'
Bobby Fer the bird to sit on,
Franklin P. Adams, the humorist
.went to visit friends in Massachu
setts. The host a man of wealth
had many curios on his walls. After
dinner he took down a rusty sword
and with much reverence said:
"Never shall I forget the day when
I drew this sword for the first time."
"Where was that?" asked Adams.
As a church bazar I" piped up the
small son of the family before his fa
ther could answer.
HIS OWN FAULT
"What do you mean? "roared the
angry husband, "by keeping me
standing here on the corner looking
like a fool?' '
"John," replied his tardy 'wife, "I
may have kept you waiting, but the
rest you did yourself."
Guest And did her husband really
insist that she learn to use a sewing
r Host Sew it-seams. Judgai