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Newspaper Page Text
WHAT HIS UNCLE LEFT HIM
He had been refused, but he de
clined to believe it
"Then I am to understand that this
is your final answer, Miss Stubbles?
"My final answer."
"Nothing can move you?"
"Then my life will be a lonely one
and my fate a harsh one, for my
uncle with whom I lived has just died
and left me "
"That fact somewhat alters the
case, Henry. I cannot be harsh to
one who has sustained such recent
bereavement. If I could believe that
you are sincere "
"Sincere! Oh, Miss Stubbles!"
"You have certainly made an im
pression on my heart Give me time
to think of it"
"After all, why think of it? Henry,
I am yours."
"Your poor uncle! Was he long
"It is too bad! You say he left
"Yes, he has left me."
"How much! I said he had left
me. He had nothing to leave. I am
alone in the world now, homeless,
penniless, but with you by my side
why, she's fainted!" Argonaut.
TAKING DUE PRECAUTIONS
Little Albert, son of a minister,
was Intensely afraid of thunder. One
afternoon in July he was caught in
what promised to be a severe elec
trical storm. His father saw him
dash for home and noticed rthat his
lips were moving as he ran. As he
got safely into the house his father
soothed his fear and then asked:
"What were you saying, Albert?"
Albert shuddered. "Oh," he re
plied, "I was just reminding God that
I am a minister's son." Ladies'
GETTING AT HIS MOTIVE
"Will you have my seat?" he in
"On the ground that I am aged and
decrepit?" the woman asked.
"No, indeed, madam."
"That I am young and beautiful
ana possibly not averse to a flirta
tion?" "Certainly not That is "
"Then it must be because you are
a gentleman, in this respect differing
from the fat person on the left and
Ihe scrawny specimen at the right I
am glad to learn your principles, sir,
but here is my street Good day."
AFTER PLEASING OTHERS
Mr. Bowen was having his Christ
mas dinner with the Reillys and the
seven-year-old son of the family was
"And what are you going to be
when you grow up, young man?"
asked Mr. Bowen of the little boy.
"Well," replied the boy thought
fully, "after I've been a minister to
please mother, an' a judge to please
father, I'm goin' to be a policeman."
Ladies' Home Journal.
Mrs. Philip Lydig, the beautiful
New York social leader, once asked
a young man who attended one of
her fancy dress balls at Newport why
he didn't wear fancy dress. She no
ticed that he smoked a cigarette in a
"I am in fancy dress," he said,
blandly. "I'm here as a cigarette
NO NOVELTY TO HER
Miss Gigglegum (single and ro
mantic) The shower of soot and
ashes from Vesuvius must be an
awe-inspiring sight Would you like
to witness it? '
Mrs. Pottson Pans (married and
prosaic) Oh, I don't know. I've
seen my husband take down a stove
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