OCR Interpretation

The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, October 07, 1916, LAST EDITION, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1916-10-07/ed-1/seq-17/

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n! y. it is sure f unney what sep
erates some married peepel, aint it,
& that's what j thought when i herd
about the dame that got sooed for
divors because a man was a insur
ance agent insted of a dockter.
' they was a veny loving1 cuppel &
got along purty well for a long time
until she made the fatel mistake &
then(it was all off with them & it
happened this way
1 evening mr. phfilips comes home
feeling purty bad & he says i have
got a bad cold, coming to me, i gess.
his wife feeds him a good supper
& he sets dowa in his room & reeds
the paper & soon forgets he is feel
ing bad, but then his wife comes in &
says tomas there is a man in the
front room who wants to speek to
do you know him, mr. phillips ink
wired of his- wife & she says, you
must forgive me, deeri but of late i
have been so much worried about
your helth, and you take so littel care
of yourself, and, o, if only you knew
how anxious i am about you
suppose i was to lose you, and she
started crying
there, there, her husband says, i
am not that sick for you to worry
about, but if it will make you feel
better about the matter i will go in
and see the dockter
it aint, his wife 'began, but he dld
ent give her no time to finish, but
husseled in to see the dockter & tell
him there wasent nothing rong with
his helth.
howdy doc, he says, & the man
says the dockter will call to exam
ine you later, i am only the insur
ance agent that rites the applika-shun
that started the trubbel, mrs. phil
lips said in cort, for her husband got
sore because she called the insurance
agent insted of the dockter when she
was worrying so much about his
By Gene Ahern
We'd like to see some of those
poor he-fish that prance up and down
Fifth av. Sunday aftern'oons sitting
with, the Brooklyn "lolds" in the
bleachers at,the Dodger parks
Three inches of water in the tub
ain't enough 'for some guys, but it's
just about two and a half inches too
much for Gran'pap Robinson, man
ager of the Dodgers.
Mowrey, third baseman for the
trolley boys, has only a couple of
orphan teeth left He isn't very old
but has been bucking up against
Brooklyn boarding house steaks for
much time.
You'd be up a tree just as, much in
Unga, Africa trying to understand
the'cHatter as you'd be in Brooklyn.
Olson, he Brooklyn shortstop, isn't
a musician, but he's something like
the Mick that muttered: "Oi can't
play a fiddle, but if oi had one I'd play
it if I could play one.""
Ballplayers are the same the-woild
over. Johnston, the Brooklyn cen
terfielder, drinks cold coffee out of
the saucer.
o o
"When Bill Simmons goes to
church they always pass the contri
bution plate to him before anyone
"Why is that? Is he such a gen
erous giver?"'
"Not he. By passing it to him first,
they don't stand a chance of losing
anything but the empty plate." N.
Y. World.
"Why have you named the cora
the Jackrabbit variety? J
"Long ears.

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