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Newspaper Page Text
The mind-wrecking problem of
how long a piece of string Is has
been solved by a Lynn, Mass., scien
tist He finds that it is from one end
to the other.
A new writing Ink has been patent
ed that is much superior to the old
kind. It stops shorter and goes
around corners more accurately and
instead of following the pen point it
goes ahead of it
There are no" signs on the rock of
Gabraltar prohibiting visitors from
taking it home for a souvenir.
.The only way to tel( the difference
Between a right-handed and left
handed walking stick is by holding it
up to a northwest moonbeam so that
it divides it by six.
We get 10c a word for writing this
stuff but the first 500 words don't
HOW THEY DO IT
"Well," said the far west mayor to
the English tourist, "I dunno how
you manage these affairs over there,
but out here, when some of our boys
got tied up in that thar bankrupt
telephone company I was tellin' yer
about, they became mighty crusty!"
"Yus; they didn't like the way the
receiver was handling' the business
"Indeed!" commented the listener;
"then what did they do?"
"They just hung up the receiver."
NO SECOND MISTAKE
"By the way, Mrs. .Small, that
check yon deposited the other day
came back marked 'no funds'."
"Oh, thanks! I won't deposit it
this time. I'll cash it instead."
Barber (entertaining his customer
as usual) Your hair Is getting very
Customer I'm jiot surprised.
foH, fcA.ffcOM SaVj
we ASU$,WHCW Af
Most contend ,
l Have t.
Caller Nellie, is your mother In7
Nellie No, mother is but shop
Caller when will she return?
Nellie HoudM Mother. wka
shall 1 say now?