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Newspaper Page Text
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AIN'T NATURE WONDERFUL!
How to Keep Well
Avoid arguments and penny ante.
Before arising in the morning,
Never fight a fella twice your size
unless it's over the phone.
Avoid croquet and all excitement.
Get a good head start going in the
opposite direction before you kick a
Don't use more than the custom
ary quartet of .aces in a poker game.
Don't stop to bite back at a watcn
dog. ' . '
Above all, never worry.. What have
you got a wife for?
If you follow all these above sug
gestions you'll never suffer from in
somnia at the movies.
A small boy who was sitting next
to a very haughty lady in a crowded
car 'kept on sniffUng in a very an
noying manner. At last the lady
could bear it no longer and turned
to the lad.
"Boy, have you got a handker
chief?" she demanded.
The small boy looked at her for a
second and then came the answer:
"Yes, I 'ave, but I don't lend it to
ALL RIGHT WITHIN
The grocer's boy was lumbering up
the .kitchen stairway with hls arm
full of packages.
"Boy," said the .mistress of the
house somewhat sharply, "are your
"Yes'm," he answered, still climb
ing the stairs. "It's only me shoel
that's dirty." Puck.
Willie was at play In the dooryard
with his little brother.
'"Ma," he hollered, "I wish ydd'd
come out here and make Bob behave
himself. Everytime I hit him on the
bead with the hammer he bawls. "
Gosh, sues a fwsh
INWMDUAl ' ;
COUPLE UVfc A BOX
OF ToMATo PLANTS?
BECAUSE THeY NEED 1
A unit iVN. a
r-s t k.
- A USEFUL AILMENT.
Tellem Si Grass bought a sure
cure for rheumatism last week.
Askem Did it cure him?
Tellem His wife won't let him
take it till after the picnic. She
wants to know whether it Is going to
rain that day. Puck.