Daily press. [volume], November 20, 1898, Image 4

About Daily press. [volume] (Newport News, Va.) 1896-current

Image provided by: Library of Virginia; Richmond, VA

                
TO THE DEAD ?N
Now rest ye safe, and sleep ye fair.
My wearied soldiers In the South:
No more the brazen trumpets bin re
Nor cannon bellow at the mouth:
No more the angry* flags are tossed
Where trench and sullen fort defy;
Where Death Is bred, and Ulfe Is lost ?
So sleep ye, sleep ye len'derly.
The nations wonder at your d
The Pocts*slne them?croua >
The Kings cry "Walt" to him
And stand like beggars ut in:
No more the yellow Hag Is down
Like sickly fester on the sky,
The crop of grape and shell U sown?
So rest ye, rest ye tei/ivrly.
Now rest ye safe, and sleei
My wearied soldiers, don
Those strange hills hold ou
So sleep ye. ami forget the sear.
God's peace Is where the swords
crossed.
And white stars-swing above the
And rest Is found where life was lo
So sleep ye. sleep ye tend. rly.
?Theodore- Kobens, In X. Y. Indepe
3 j gfeft? <# ?9? # # ffi ffi ffi ?8? ?
How the Thoughtlessness of Travelers Makes
Life a Burden & Car Etiquette Rules.
- Copyright.
!WHAT SQUARED
TOM'S ACCOUNT
Uy Git ace DCFFIEI.U I
TOM sat by liie library table
iug over his arithmetic lessi
was trying to Und out how much seven
yards of calico would cost if one yard
cost 11 cents, and his paper was covered
with figures. Finally In; look a new
piece ami begun again:
To 7 yds. calico at 11 els. S .77
And as he finished tin- last seven his
father looked over his shoulder.
"Hills. Tom?" hensked. "That's right.
1 only hope you will never get as many
as 1 have-." And he dropped into the
armchair by the lire, tired with the
day's work and glad to be ut home
again.
Tom came over and leaned against his
father's knee for a few minute
before dinner that Miey always 1
get her.
"Papa," ho asked, "when a ma
any work, oughtn't be lo be pi
it V"
"Certainly," was papa's reply, If
he asks a fair price."
Then they began to talk of something
else, and papa forgot the question and
Ids own reply long before dinner was
ready.
The next day was Saturday, but Tom
stayed in ihr. house, working busily at
his arithmetic. .Mamma told Kale that
she was afraid Tom was not well, and
she really looked relieved to see him
flying down the hill in the afternoon.
Wonder of wonders! he was not late to
dinner, but came in early, and slipped
into the dining-room before anyone
else had come down, lie looked a little
conscious when a note dropped out of
euch napkin, and waited impatiently
to see them unfolded. Kate opened
hers first and glanced through it, break?
ing out into a merry laughter. Tom
looked cross. Kate always luughcd at
him. He wished he was 111 and she was
32, he would laugh at her all the lime.
"Why, Tom," she was saying, "what
A BIGAMIST'S DIARY.
Chsr'.e-s Woodruff Is the champion big?
amist of the world. He lias been married
SO times to as many different women. His
average residence with them was about
three months. One never saw hljn after the
wedding ceremony?neither did she ever
?see again about J600 worth of Jewelry in?
trusted to his keeping. In Woodruff's diary
were found the following observations- on
women, love and niatrlmor.
in l^onuon. a coat or arms or a mon* |
ogram is marked on the throat or j ~
breast of the animal. The process Is
made almost painless by the use of co?
caine.
An unique series of weddings took
place recently in the Catholic church
at Adelong. when the -Misses Hoffman
(three) were married to three broth
ers named Quinn. Two of the brothers
who were married were twins, and also
A DESERTED CITY.
Title of the Dlnsolutton of One of the
Stranicect Town* on This
Continent.
niions to one's fellow-travelers ano
> contribute not a little to the pleas
ire of I he journey, one can never pre
umc to found an acquaintance upon
ucli a meeting unless the circina?
ta nc es are very exceptional. A young
vornan journeying alone will always
liscoi.ragc the attentions of young men
inless they belong to a party, the ladies
.1 which show an ctpial interest in the
traveler. Suiy.'ly there are other
and better ways of increasing the lisi
,>f our acquaintances than by taking
advantage ot the overcrowding of u
1 ail way car.
There is one si inple rule which young
women and girls would do well to ob?
serve upon entering a ear where only
half seats remain vacant. They shou'.d
always select a seat beside a woman;
while one such t.eut remains vacant no
well-bred girl would share the seut oc?
cupied by a man. Once, however, all
I he seats occupied by her own sex have
been Idled. H is then ndlnissuble for her
lo occupy the seat with a man.
A man occupying a half seat should
always yield his place to two ladies if
ile \ arc in company, und find another
beside some man, or if none are avail
le, beside a woman; the same rule ap
Just indignationrenders a person elo- ? ^ q{ the sisters 0[)e otJie; ^thei
quent Indeed.
Marriage often kills love, just as it
gave it beiug.
Love can be cruder than friendship;
indifference than bate.
Sentiment is nothing but thought
blended with feeling. ?
Love is a fleeing something. It-is like
the horizon, always just ahead.
Where our hopes lie. there we most
easily deceive ourselves.
Love is not a common thing. Sordid
ambition is taking its time-honored
place.
i ? i tioii is reported from Holtum It took
Love in the hands of a lin-de-sucle . 1 *. ,
d the form of a special thanksgiving
service at Den lie church, Holtou, the
man is like clay in the potter's h
You can do with it what you wish.
There is no such thing as killing the
love we have for one, but there is such
a thing as killing the joy there is in
that love.
Sometimes a woman's thought- are
vaguely recorded on her face; at other
times the face photographs the emo?
tions and thoughts.
You can easily get over caring for
persons, but you tun't get over li'-ing
them. If you like them because .hey
are sweet and pure, that is what hurts.
I sometimes feel like the alchemist
who spends days and nights beside his
retorts, that he mnv not miss the nio
In Nevada county, Cal.. repose the
remains of one of the strangest towns
ou Uiis continent. Meadow Lake is the
American Pompeii, whose entombing
lava is the summit snow storms, which
sometimes bury it 23 feet deep on a
level, and whose annual exhuming is
brought about by the summer sun, says
the New York Herald.
It was in the summer of 18G5 that the
name Meadow Lake was formally given
to the town, previously called Excel?
sior and Summit City. Until 1858 noth?
ing- had been done in the way of pros?
pecting that particular locality.
Henry llartly, an Englishman, who
visited the vicinity in Juue, 18G3, in
search of game und chanced to discover
fragments of gold, imparted his discov?
ery to his friends. A company was
formed and soon after other companies
and the building of a city was started,
j With the close of the fall of 1865
1 the new city contained about 150
; houses completed and a number of oth
i ers in course of construction. Then all
, ? hopes were blasted. The adventurers
church for them, and 4U children and | awoke tQ the su(j rcaUty that, though
of the Quinn family is already married
to a sister of the Hoffmans.
The wife of an East end clergyman
has made a collection of all the but?
tons placed in the offertory bags dur?
ing the last two or three years, and has
fastened them to cardboard in various
cunning shapes of animals, birds and
flowers. As a bazar is shortly to take
place in connection with the church,
she has had these button-pictures pho?
tographed, and copies will be on side
at the exhibition.
unique golden wedding celebra
nnrties concerned being Mr. William
llodgkins, formerly chief constable of
Oldhain, and his wife. Those present
included the best man and bridesmaids
w ho officiated 50 years ago in the same
grandchildren.
PEOPLE TALKED AEOUT.
ment for which he has loni.
waited for.
?d for ;
THE BIBLE IN ENGLISH.
"CERTAINLY." WAS PAPA'S ItI!PLY.
perfect nonsense! Mother,
ever see anything like this',
sent me a bill for helping me yestcr- "r" ? ' "
day!" " 1|;;";h,-;\ .T"!
In the meantime papa ami mamma |
had opened their notes, and i
covered that they, too,
bills from Tom. l'apa's
Mr. E. W. Ellis.
In account with T<
To two runnings upstairs n
To three bringlng-i of paj
eenis.
To one Unding slippers at f
Sum total.
Received payment.
Alumina's was a little
these were the items:
To one going to tell Bridget s
To three tiurrylngs up when 1
want to at live ct-nts.
To two errands at Jones' store
cents.
Total.
Kate had the worst of all.
way hers read:
To four going to Motile- Brown's at I
To one holding worsted (cause 1 hut
at 11 cents.
To two takln? books to Llberry at l
cents.
Total.
Papa put his down without saying
anything, und mamma looked at Tom
with a queer little smile, remarking:
"Well. Tom, it seems that the family
owes you more thau a dollar."
"Yes, ma'aiu," said Tom, cheerfully;
"and papa said If a man asked a fair
price for his work he ought to get it.
And if you could pay up to-night 1 could
get that dandy big jackknife on Mon?
day?the one like Ned's, you know .''
The family didn't say whether it in?
tended to "puy up" at once or not. and
'Join felt a little doubtful, when he
found papa and mamma talking in the
study together afterward, just how his
i|>lan would succeed.
Huwever, at breakfast, he found be?
side his plate a dollar bill, a ten-cent
piece and three pennies, und the three
bills waiting to be. receipted. He
signed "Torn Ellis" In big letters to
each one, and pocketed his money,
thinking of the big knife that lip wu?
going to have
lue nrsi tning ne oio wnen lie e
home from school in the afternoon was
to run to mamma and show her the
four blades?two big ones and two
tie ones?and she was almost as much
plcaiscd as he. At dinner lime he was
tjiiite *i;rprised to find in his napkin,
"*?i"ia time, three Tittle notes jusi like
the ones he had sent to papa and mam?
ma and Kate the night before. He
didn't open them until after dinner,
because the little doubtful feeling had
come back, and he thought he would
rather be by himself. When, finally, he
did look at them, this is what he found:
Tom Ellis,.
- In account with Mr. E.^W. Ellis:
REGARDLESS OF OTHERS,
plies to a man as to a woman in this re?
gard.
Ity following- this simple rule young
women will avoid the possibility of un?
pleasant conversations being forced
upon them, and they will also avoid the
ranee of seeking to make lie
: No woman need submit to rudeness oi
annoyance on any train or car. The
conductor is, in such a case, a public
t.Micer^ to "JjjPI' '^^/il^^'/.l'J.i.
peTdiiiinicduuTly^A
however, generally sufficiently signifi?
cant to check the most impudent ad?
vances.
A woman is privileged to resent by
her manner, or even to point out a va?
cant seat, to any man who attempts
to seat himself at her side while there
upicd seats in the car.
Kvcry rule of good conduct, good na?
ture ami kindness, is broken a hun?
dred linns a day in every crowded
street ear. People seem to forget their
breeding the moment the car stops for
them to get on. Crowding and pushing,
and elbowing- fcir place is the accepted
idea; the passengers take their own
time to get on and off unless stimulated
by the familiar "Step lively there!" of
the conductor. No one will move up
to make room for another voluntarily,
ami no one seems to hesitate to trample
! upon i b.- feet of his or her neighbors in
I making the necessary entrance and
exit. Men stare without constraint at
the women opposite, and the women
audibly criticise one another in appar?
ent disregard of wounded feelings and
embittered hours.
11 is absolutely inndmissahle to argue
with the conductor upon any disputed
point. If the car goes by your corner,
oi- the conductor does not immediately
respond lo your signal to slop the car,
say nothing but alight without a frown
upon t our brow. After all. it is only
a block, and it is better to refrain from
our feelings than to make a
public exhibition of temper. Moreover
the conductor will be silently grateful
lo you. One should never haggle about
change or attempt to pass foreign or
doubl fill coins on a street car. Try
these mi on,-'s ow n tradesmen; it saves
disagreeable experiences.
M is. perhaps, that these public con?
veyances have become so familiar to
ns thai wc have ceased to practice re?
serve and consideration when employ?
ing tliem. but it seems certain that in
? own homes we exercise a good na
e and forbearance that could not be
i.-s in our relations with our fellow
fortunates on train and street car.
1. Adheltn of Sherborn?A Psalter,
706 A. D.
2. Egbert of Tidisform?The Four
Gospels, about 706.
3. Cede finished the translation of
the whole Bible into Saxon, 735 A. U.
4. King Alfred?The Psalms and
greater part of New Testament, 900
A. D.
John Wycliffe? The whole Bible
inio English, 1380 A. U.
ii. William Tyndale?The first print?
ed copy of the Scriptures into Knglh-h,
ir,:i5.
7. Coverdnle?The great Bible, fin?
ished in London, 1539.
h. William Whittiiigbam?Genevan
Bible. 1560.
'J. Archbishop Parker?The Bishop's
Bible, 15G0.
10. A Kornau Catholic version of the
New Testuiuent was published nt
Rheims, 15S2. and the Old Testament
at Douny, 1010.
11. King James VI. commissioned 47
learned men who published in 1611 the
Authorized Version.
12. Dr. Blyney, 1709. revised punc?
tuation, added references, etc. This
edition, from its accuracy, is called
the Standard, Is used for the multi?
plication of correct copies for public
use.
13. The Revised Version, prepared
at Westminster abbey. 1870. by the
reutest Bible scholars of the world.?
Mrs. Vanderbilt rejoices in the pos?
session of the most beautiful cat i.i the
world; it cost no less than. ?200.
Adam Langer, of Royal Oak, Mich.,
is the oldest bread winner in that st<B*.
He is 94 and drives a milk wagon.
London's latest beauty. Pamela
Snowdeu, never fails to wear a wreath
of lilies about her small head, and
never docs the smallest jewel spatkle
ubout licr toilet.
S. N. D. North, of New York, says
he was the first person to make a prac?
tical business use of the typewriter.
He used it first in 1S72.
One of the queen of Italy's hobbies
i.- -hoe collecting. She has fitted up
:. large museum which is iilled with
l lie footgear of past celehrites, kiel tid?
ing shoe? worn by Joan of Arc and
Marie An I citic tte.
Mr. T. Sidney Cooper, the royal
academician, is stili painting nt the
t-.ge of 93 years. He began to exhibit
in 1833, and tluingh 04 years cf age
when made a full R. A., has continued
an active member for 31 years.
Peter Schemm, the aged Philadel?
phia brewer who committed suicide
the oilier day by throwing himself over
Niagara falls, for many years could
not be induced to extend Iiis list of
customers. His beer w:ts regarded as
the best in the count!';-, audit was all
brewed in the old-fashioned way. lie
had enough money .and lie would only
supply those or the children of those
who had helped him when he was a
poor young man.
there was plenty of gold in Meadow
Lake, it was so combined with some
substance unknown to the metallur?
gists that it was effectually locked
from the haiul of man.
All dreams, the black art. science
and metallurgy were set at naught.
One after another, as they abandoned
hope, the disappointed gold seekers
turned their backs on Meadow Lake
and went down the mountain.
More than $2.000,000 had been poured
into that bot torn less abyss of California
known as "dead work." to pay for mills,
roads, buildings and mining.
For years the solitary inhabitant of
Meadow Lake was llartly. the English?
man who was mainly responsible for
the existence of the town.
CATS PROTECT CHICKENS.
UNIFORMS OF ALL TIMES.
Union Gospel News
SIX OF THE BEST TIT-BITS.
to slum
Pouter?
A man recently smoked cigarettes all
day without any particular barm re?
sulting. The only visible effect was Un?
dent h of the smoker.
First Boy?"Did your mother punish
you for going in swimming without her
consent?" Second Boy?"Yes." "What
did she do?" "Made nie takeabulh!"
Mrs. Pouter?"But 1
nil your joys with i
"Then let me off en l..at cape and bon?
net." Mrs. Pouter?"But 1 want to
?hare your sorrows, too."
"That youngest boy of yours does not
seem to be a credit to you." said the
white man to Uncle Mose. "No, sah."
saitl Uncle Mose. "He is de wustesf
chile I has. lie is mighty bad. He's
de white sheep of de fam'ly. sah."
Willie Strutt was playing with the
Timbs boys. His mother called him.
"Willie, don't you know those are bad
boys for you to play with'.'" "Yes.
mother," said Willie, "I know that, but
then, I am a good boy for them to play
with."
Patent Medicine Proprielor?"Here"
after, all testimonials must be accom?
panied by orders for at least hair" a
dozen bottles of medicine." Clerk?
"Yes. sir." Patent Medicine Proprie?
tor?"If these people want to see their
names in print, they ought to pay for
iL"
Valerius Maximus, the 'Ionian em?
peror, ordered the Roman soldiers ?o
wear red so they would nol be fri
eued at the sight of their own b
and even now red forms a cor
Three Senit-\Vtl?l Tnliblej Pounco
tpun a Hawk That Invaded a
Poultry Yard.
II. ('. Burnett, who lives near Media,
has in his possession the body of a
chicken hawk that was killed in a pe?
culiar manner, rejiorts the Philadel?
phia Record. Bnrnett is a general
farmer, but makes a specialty of poul?
try raising. Since he has owned the
farm three old cats left by the former
tenant have hung about the place in a
semi-wild state. At first Harriett tried
to tame the animals, but they repulsed
all friendly overtures and took up their
abode in the barn. However, as they
did not harm the chickens they were
not molested.
The other day, while Barnett was on
his barn roof replacing some shingles,
he heard a loud cackling in the yard
below. Looking down, he saw a num?
ber of his chickens huddled together
and seemingly greatly agitated. Then
he discovered a large hawk just pre?
paring to make a swoop. Bnrnett was
preparing to descend io _the_
part oi FreTTcTS unu cnglish imiforms.
In our own army red. is not used ex?
cept for facings, on the ground that
ii attracts attention in the field,
though experiments in Germany prove
that a blue target is hit three times
where a red one is hit once.
During the revolutionary war each
colony iuu! its militia, and theuuiforms
of each body were different. Later
the higher officers came to he known
by the colored ribbons worn across
I heir breasts, ntnl the lower officers
by the cockade worn in their huts.
In 1821 dark blue was declared to be
the national uniform color for both
officers ami enlisted men, the only ex?
ception being scarlet coals for mu?
sicians and gray coals for cadets.
Various changes took place in the
shape of the clothing of the soldiers
until ISC3, when our uniforms became
practically fixed, the cloth for the
trousers being light blue and the fac?
ings being light clue for infantry, yel?
low for cavalry and red fornrtillery.
in,- (.mniiinniion too ?i?ieb.
Your mother agrees with me exact
Johnny." said his father, proceed?
ing io trim the twigs from a tough
switch. "She thinks, with me. that you
I need a good, trouncing, and you are go?
ing to get it. my son."
"Vis." bitterly exclaimed Johnny.
"You and maw always agrees when it
comes to lickin' me. You and maw's
the whole thing. 1 don't never have no
show. This fum'iy'srun by u trust!"?
Chicago Tribune.
d Blind Man
uv ycr tread, lady.
Miss A nteuq ne (si in peri ugly)?Here is
u half-dollar; but 1 must scold you for
saying I am beautiful.
Alleged Blind Man Ah. lady, if you
you knew how badly I neededdismoney
you would fergive a little lyin' gallant
tlciuan,
This is
lady so
fee I q u i
cpei
ii hunt
There
Ii as those
man to cx
bertlis with a lady who had
i unfortunate as to be assigned
pjier bin b into which she ki!
id never climb. No lau compels
ilice on the part of the gen
ml he is quite sure to make it.
ii generally understood that a
situated, traveling alone, nviv
o at liberty to ask the coa
.1 iS ry. Tank yer.?Judee.
doctor of the car to make such an ex?
change for her. It is needless to say
tKo? while one. may show niaui small
i in- Aiiurciiiat im n'iitiii.
Mrs. Rinks?A noted anarchist of
Chicago says that people will wake up
some line morning, and find that Rus?
sell Sage has lost every dollar.
Mr- Kinks?That's so, every ford of
It.
"My goodness! When will it be, do
you think?"
"When he dies."?N. Y. Weekly.
Declared Hla Inleotlou?.
Fond Mother?lias Sig. Arluro, with
whom you have been dancing- ail the
evening, at last declared hu inten?
tions?
"Yes. mamma."
"Thank goodness! And what did he
say ?"
"He declared he would mwer get
married."?Roxbury Gazette.
USELESS INFORMATION.
Wooden legs are used by over 1,000,
U00 English-speaking men.
The Sandwich Islanders estimate the
beauty of women by their weigh I.
In the United States only on.? mur?
derer in 50 is condemned to death.
The people of the United States con?
sume 200.000,000 bottles of pickles nu
Qually.
An international matrimonial paper,
limited in three languages, is about to
make its appearance in Berlin.
The use of coats of arms as a badge
for different families did not conic into
practice till the twelfth century. The
Germans are said tu have originated it.
while the: French developed t he science.
Several scientific papers have recent?
ly announced the discovery that the
odor of sweet peas is obnoxious lo (lies. |
and that when placed in a sickroom it
will keep it free from these tiresome
pests.
The tide-like effect of gales on lakes
having no ordinary tides is very con?
siderable. In the Caspian a gale will
raise the water on one side si.'j feet
musing a total difference of level of 12
feet. On Lake Erie heavy gales oci ::
iionnlly cause a (V. (Tcrmce of level .
uui Of THE ORDINARY.
THE FASHIONABLE TRIMMINGS
For elaborate irimming-s both silk
applique and beaded trimmings are
shown in relief on tiik chilTnn bands.
Silk applique trimmings in both
black and colors are chosen for em?
bellishment where superior effect is
designed.
Velvets, plain and mirrored, are fa?
vored by many, and Persian designs
in silk and in silk and woo! supply
vests or bands for enrichiiigskirts and
waists of costumes made from mate?
rials of one color.
Ribbons lose none of their popular?
ity in the flood of trimmings from
which a choice may he made. So
marked has become the demand that
chirred ribbons of popular widths have
been introduced and are so freely used
that they often overshadow the mate?
rial they are employed lo ornament
Ruttons have regained much "of
their old-time popularity and are now
jsed by many of the lending cou?
turiers.?American Queen.
One of the choicest delicacies in Ja
maica is a huge white worm found in
the heart of the cabbage palm. Ii
lasles, when cooked, like almonds.
For seven years the St. Lawrence
river in Canada gradually increuses in
depth, the difference in level being
about five feet.
An unmanned balloon which started
from Paris and dropped in Westphalia
reached a height of about ten miles
and recorded a minimum temperature
of 83 degrees Fahr, below zero.
Resented,
Drummer?Mr. Greutinnn was very
much charmed \\ith this place-! In his
book be calls it a quaint and sleepy old
town?
Native (indignantly)?Well, it may"
be quaint, but I tlon'tsec nothtn' sleepy
about a place where everybody's up ut
four in the morning!?Puck.
Cause nnd Rffect.
Teacher?Why didn't you come to
school yesterday?
Tommy Trnddles?Please, 1 was sick.
Teacher?What was the matter with
you?
Tommy Traddles?I was sick of
school.?Harlem Life.
uawK made a plunge, at the
terrified fowls. The robber was lei?
surely preparing to carry off a chicken
when there was a quick patter of feet
and the three cats bounded into view.
The hawk made un effort to escape
with its prey, but the cats came to the
rescue in the nick of time. The hawk
made a spunky resistance, but the com?
bined assault of the cats overpowered
him, although only after a fierce bat?
tle. Barnett had reached the battle?
field by this time, and he rescued the
hawk's body from the cats.
POETESS ON COMPLEXION.
She SHyii That Love and Sorrow Oaly
lutenNlfy the Ueaoty of
L'ii nop his dented.
First Tramp?When you wuz a boy
did you ever expect to be in dis busi?
ness?
Second Tramp?No;?in me childish
innocence I fought it. wuz necessary
to work fer a livin'.?Puck.
Further Explained.
"Did you ?ny that gentleman made
his fortune by some important discov?
eries in metl'cal lore?"
"Yes," answered Jllss Cayenne. "He
,? , , i discovered a new way to advertise a
Tattooed do*a are now the fashion ?aHuhla recine."?Woahineton. Star,
A poetess of passion has written an
article on the art of keeping young,
says the New York Commercial Adver?
tiser. She does not ?all it that and she
devotes nearlv all her space to complex?
ions. Of figures or hair or dress or ideas
she says not a word. She says women
do not paint or calcimine their faces in
Ibis enlightened age, but they do work
over them and think about them and
spend money oil them. They do no*, tell
the men of theiracqiiaintancethe brand
of cold cream or the make of loofuh they
employ, because men are prejudiced
beings und cannot conceive of virtue
?.nd pearl powder in the same person.
Man thinks soap and watersufficientcos
metics for any woman. The poetessof
passion flouts him; she says there are
scores of excellent persons of the feto>
irine persuasion-who never use soapen
their faces. One of the most, beautiful
women she knew at 60 had a pink aud^
v.hiie skin, the result of bathing in hog
milk, and never having used soap.
The observing writer goes ou to sai
that the popular idea that amiable, uiiq
ftelijig. unemotional women alone canSf
retain their youthful complexions is a
fallacy. Love and sorrow intensify in
siead of spoiling beauty, she says. His
only the lower and meaner passions, "
like envy and spite and ill-temper,which
mar the face beyond repair, ant? the
poetess believes in skin tonics and skin
food, massage and all the other scien?
tific aids to beauty.
No Chance for a C'onnset 'mere.
"A conflict of arms," he said, "is a
terrible thing."
"Of course," she replied, blushing
prettily; "and so inexcusable, too. I
hold that the disposition a man makes
of his arms is none of a girl's business."
Alter that, of course, there was no
chance for a con?ict.?Chicago Post.
He Couldn't Understand It.
"Pa," said the alderman's little son,
"is there any truth in the story that
George Washington never toldalie?"
"Yes, I guess there is," was the. reply.
"Well," continued the embryo states?
man, "I don't see how he ever got his
pull in politics."?Chicago Daily News.
HIh Answer.
Mrs. Grum (looking up from her
newspaper)?1 have just been readirgan
item about a man who traded his dog
for another man's wife.
Old Grum?Hoh! Some men don't
c*\re much for dogs.?N. Y. Journal.
The Supreme Teat.
Jackson?Heaven bless him! Ha
showed confidence in me when the '
clouds were dark and threatening.
Wilson?In what way?
Jackson?Ha lent me an umbrella,?
Chicago Joufaftfa ?_i