PAGE FOUR
(Section Two)
THE ARIZONA REPUBLICAN. SUNDAY MORNING, UUTUUEK 1U, lyO
THE YOUNG UlDt ACROSS TKtWA!
BRINGING UP FATHER
(Copyright 1917. by International News Service)
By George McManus
WELL -VH ATS
OOD i WHAT
VOOLD VCO
"SUREST ON
THE BILL -Or
WELL-I SHOULD
SAX' WE DO
EAT HERE - t OlSLV
DO YOU SERVE
CHICKENS HERE ?
WHEN DO VOL)
EVPECT THEM?
WORK!
FARE ?
1
HUNCRf- ccuuo h 4 rfrr
EVEN EAT WHAT 5X $ A ' fl
MAXiCIC COOKS- 'vi ,
fee
rCa saasr
I v r- '
V ir J
1
1
1 - u xy -at v f
i
THI VOUNQ LADY ACROSS THI
WAY.
The ynnv ladr eerea (S way My
lie pllr iy miMr'I ha eanftnad
the railroad Incraaaaa t rr(fct rataa
an aot hare ha 4 ibfaa eat the pganl
tUa aajUUng.
SUCM AP
By O. B. JOYFUL
" "Fiulrrr aas I. "why Is this the
best time to study the book of na
turr "Because autumn turns the leaves."
ays he.
"Rtrht you are," cay I. "But can
you tell me what makes more noise
than a pig under a fence ?"
"Two," says he.
Now. nays I. 'here'a a puzllnu
problem : Frown has five children, ar.d
half are boys."
"So'i the other half." says he.
"Ton are Improving In arithmetic."
cay; I.
"Tee." aava 'hut T ran't fimir
"Here's to Your
'Good Health"
That la the Idea youTI ret eat
of BLATZ. If eo lively, apark
linf. effervescent that you caa
see the Joy thrills In every bio
ble and feet them, too, aa they
trickle down your throat, cooling,
quench In. refreahtn-. exhilar
ating, all the way down.
IMPORTED
SWISS CHEESE
AND LIMBURGER
SANDWICHES
Pave your luncheons and cold
drinks put up for your Bunday
ricnic
The
ROSE TREE
Phone 1317
Taxi-
GGJ 4 Wig?
A A-' ! Ik
J :-rp AriL 3 jt alum the fh&m Ji yf:4
't
DOINGS OF THE DUFFS
i i i i . ,
WEIL, ZLMtBjsSJL 1 . 1 Ve GoT A WoYE. HESE. I MfcDtfWiTWStS LMEt2.-l "II Vi .
Wet DOwU PRoePTIY WAaTT Ya To Take. ovETO kflj.c KiirtrwAiiO 1 I 01) 'BET 1
MoRiAjtf ( fir, 9 ho,VoSt avert Tq mh pooV aT.o t r T.
-r 7y UwecUfElJ hucKV RkthT ovec I , : J- , Cl' J
THIRD PARTY STUFF
out how It is that Kid Cleason says
managins; the 'White Sox is the hardest
JoS In the country."
Its not." says I.
-What Is. then." says be.
"Wheeling-. West Virginia,- says I.
"Have you noticed the difference
between the new dollar and dime?"
i.ivn he.
"f there a difference?" says I. .
"Yes." says he. "ninety cents."
"And what." says I, "was the largest
river In America before the Mississippi
was discovered?"
"The lhlo, I guess," says he.
"Tou're wron." says I; "the Missis
slppi was the longest even before La
salle waded into it."
a
"Yes." says he. "but long before then
every body in the world heard a rooster
crow."
"Not Just one rooster," says I.
"Yes, one rooster." says he.
"Not everybody in the world heard
him crow?" ssys I.
"Kvorybody at the same time." says
THE GREAT AMERICAN
rrlLTAKt MORE THAN
THE VMOMETNS SUPPORT
TO Uf-HCH-O
TMI RO PARTY ?
he.
"Imprsslble." says I. .
"Hut it was done," says he.
"When?" says I.
"When Noah's rooster crowed in the
ark," says he.
HIGHWAYS WEATHER BULLETIN
River Crossings
Saca-;on There is no water in the
Gila and the crossing M Rood.
Apache County
All roads In pood condition.
Cochise County
All main roads good condition and
being improved.
Coconino County
Roads generally poo1. Showers
causing some mud over short stretches,
but net delaying travel.
Graham County
Couity roads in fair condition.
Greenlee County
All ronds in good condition, slight
da,mat;e caused by recent raina re
paired. Gila County
Corstruction of I'aypon-Green val
ley read started, four mil"s romnletcd.
Widening road north of Roosevelt
HOME
x i ' 1 ' 1 11 1 1 1,1 ' 1 1 1 ' 1 1 ' 1 1 ' 1 '
J INCHES Fljofa
THEGOLDEN-PLATB RULE
SYUt B? Lillian Paschal Day
SWEARING VS. PROFANITY
My neighbor has a fine husband.
He's a kind father and all that.
Cut he WILL swear.
At least SHE calls it swearing.
He doesn't says he's not profane.
"That's taking God's name in vain.
Plain damn is not profanity.
"It s merely a harmless expletive."
His ultra-good wife sniffs.
"You make it a harmful explosive."
"Emphasis, my dear." says Husband.
"Raise it to the superlative degree,
rositlve, dear that's you.
Comparative, darn that's Sonny.
Superlative, damn that's Dad."
She tried flattery.
"Your lips are lovely, clear -cut.
But swearwotds soil them."
He kissed her with them.
"Soil's In your Puritan eye, dear.
Feeling's got to have an outlet."
She tried the Golden Rule on him.
"Do as you'd be done xy.
Suppose I awore all the time?"
Her sample was a rank failure.
The naughty word choked her.
She decided to try another tack.
Sonny was In on it. also the cook.
One evening Dad come home tired.
Wifey met him smiling at tha door.
He kissed a smudate on her cheek.
"Dirty-face!" he reproved.
'Pen helping Bridget, Girly?"
He sat down at table.
The cloth was soiled and spotted.
He unfolded his napkin.
It was all coffe stains.
started. Reconstruction ef upper por
tion of Strawberry hill in northern por
tion contemplated to start soon. Roads
all over county in fair shape.
Maricopa County
Prescott-W'ickenburg road good.
Black Canyon slow from New river
north. Florence, new state highway to
forks at Superior. i
Coast Darker and Blythe ferries
running. Tempe bridge open for light
vehicles.
Mohave County
All main roads in fair condition ex
cept Old Trails National highway from
Crozier to Hackberry, and Oatman to
Topock. Drivers must be careful in
crossing washes.
Navajo County
Holbrook-WinHlow road good on
north side of railroad. St. Johns road
good except for short stretch of sand
in petrified forest. Best road to Fort
Apache Black mesa; telegraph road
under improvement.
Pima County
All main roads in the county in good
shape; balance fair. Federal road to
Mt. Lemon is completed.
Pinal County
Mountain roads in good condition,
valley roads dusty and rough. Flor-ence-Casa
Grande road bad due to re
construction; take desert, roads be
tween these two points.
Santa Cruz County
Several storms last week; roads
Pipe, pipe repairing and smokers' novelties.
Arizona Cigar Store
C. C. E AKI
15 North Central
I . . h
"Bridget, bring clean " he began.
The cook brought the roast.'
She was a sight to behold.
Her hands were black, face sooty.
A greasy apron enfolded her.
He eyed her, but dared no word.
Good cooks are scarce.
But he took it out on Sonny.
"Go wash your face!" he roared.
"And get behind your ears.
Change that filthy blouse! March!"
Sonny howled. He. did it very well.
He dug dirty fists in his eyes.
"Ma said I needn't!" he bellowed.
Dad looked at Ma astounded.
She nodded. "Boys feel better so.
His feelings must have an outlet.
Eat your dinner." But he couldn't.
The plates and knives were sticky.
Forks had morning egg in the tines.
Food sickened him. He snorted.
He stalked out to his den.
Chunks of mud were in his chair.
Cobwebs draped walls and pictures.
He took.up his pipe for solace.
It was filled brimful with dust.
He swore and called his wife.
She came, smiling through tears.
Light came. He grinned ehepishly.
"Swearwords soil your lips
"I don't love dirt, she said.
She l;Issed the naughty, lips.
I'll try damned hard I" he vowed.
He kept it, too.
Isn't it odd?
Men folks will offend your ears.
They hate you to offend their eyes.
w-ashed out In several places through
out county.
Yavapai County
Roads generally in fair condition.
Yuma County
Ehrenberg ferry open to traffic.
Road in good condition.
WATCH
Tally 's
Arena
FOR
CLEAN
SPORTS
OUR cigars are
always so fresh
and nice it's no
wonder our store is
so popular. Make
it your headquar
ters and you will
get more pleasure
out of the money
you spend for
cigars. Ask us
about some of our
special favorites.
Nt Proprietor
Mail Orders Given Prompt Attention
1920 """- rATom
EVERETT TRUE
GRCAt SUNS MRS. TRUE. YtfU'Ve. SOT
OMOOaH POWT3CR ON YOUR FACCT TO
r
BLOW UP BERLIN ii ;do vou suppose
I'M OINK
-j 1 fOU tcycjpvtriv. uivit iHftl V V
i R I'll say
i rA I IP
ana
rejresning
M '
I :?5ii.fJ.,)il fed
leverage
atmealtifiies
ma rs i $ z i mwj.. - ar w rm mrm-m w
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3t5S k
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THE MELCZER COMPANY 6
DISTRIBUTORS
PHOENIX,
Smvica. ikc
By Alman
By Condo
THt STfi.CST WITH
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ARIZONA
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