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The San Saba news. [volume] (San Saba, Tex.) 1873-1966, June 12, 1891, Image 2

Image and text provided by University of North Texas; Denton, TX

Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn84022097/1891-06-12/ed-1/seq-2/

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Between the years of 1880 and 1800
the Sacramento Valley according to tha
census lost 20000 In population all
says a California Exchange because 100
landholders monopolize 1082600 acres
of as good land as there is beneath the
sun
Tc cut our grain lo California
says Senator Stanford wo are usin a
machine which reaps a swath fortytwo
feet wide thrtshes tha grain as it goes
along puts it in bags which men stich
up and drop in tho neldVeodthetoraiJ
machine rakes the straw in and burns it
for fuel upon that reaper
When Stanley returned to London last
fall there was a fad for alleged African
dishes which if the native of that
country could have tasted they un
doubtedly would hare pronounced bogus
Theso dishes crested so much dyspepsia
and other illness that people decided
they would rather read about than eat
them And so thai gastronomic fad ex
pired
The first woman who ever voted in
Texas chronicles the CourierJournal is
Mrs Carrie 13 Foster of Houston who
on a recent Monday rode to the polls
and cast her ballot in the election to
amend tho charter relative to issuing
bonds Jlrs Foster claimed her rights
as a propertyholder to vote The pre
cedent will be hercaflcr availed of by
Qther ladies who arc taxpayers
Thomas Edison says there are more
than GOO000000 invested in tho elec
trical industry in the United States The
electrical supply business alone the
mere making of the tools to do business
with amounts to between 63000030
and 75000000 a year Nearly J00
000 miles ol wire are ascd to convey a
million messages a day over more than
300000 telephones What does the
ghost of Ben Franklin think of that
muses the Atlanta Constitution
It is said that between the Island of
Madagascar and the coast of India there
are sixteen thousand islands only six
hundred of which arc inhabited In any
of these islands a man can live and sup
port his family in princely luxury with
islands he neednt work at all as Nature
provides the food and no clothes are re
quired It is strange soliloquizes the
Boston Transcript that the great frater
nity cf lazy men have not drifted to these
islands or it would be If they were not
so lazy
The British Army in spite of Minis
terial sclfgratulation is in a bad way
It appears to be true that the army is
slowly dying a sort of natural death
There are not enough recruits to fill tho
vacancies and the establishment is 4500
men short Two military writers of
high rank are simultaneously endeavor
ing to excite some interest in this state
of things Major Trench in fitadtcoodi
Maaazine and Colenel EingHarman In
the United Senia Magazine For the
British taxpayer the point of interest is
that in spite of a colossal expenditure
and wonderful speeches from the Treas
ury bench the atmy is as badly off for
recruit as for brain at the head
Bays a Western lumberman Tho
signing of a contract for 600000000
feet of pins in Minnesota should serve as
a reminder that the fear of American
forests giving out is far from being an
imaginary one I have been handling
lumber by the 10000 feet for twothirds
of a lifetime but the figures in this deal
took me by surprise and it was some
time before I could realize them Tho
supply of lumber in the North is steadily
giving cut as the figures for Michigan
in particular show Ten years ago the
AT EVENING
Eastward the hilltops show
bill where his wheels have run
All ifolden in the glow
Of the departing Son
Burns now a single spar
In th last crimson light
Fades and above one star
Blooms in the night
As twere a jewelflower
Set In this garden blue
Telling the twilight hour
When falls the silent dew
Artwere a lantern there
Lighting Dianas way
Through the dim realms of air
With Its pale ray
Over yon purple line
Sec her white face appears 1
Breathe once the air divine
Steeped in he fragrant tears I
Out of this silver bath
Flowers shall emerge at dawn
Gracing the narroij path
Across the lawn
Far in the tranquil deep
Tremble a million eyes
Guarding the world asleep
Under the summer sides
Night hke a mother mild
Tenderly to her breast
Takes up her weary chtld
And gives it rest
FrankShcrmanin TouWi Companion
APOEfEAITOFALADT
annual output or product was just about closed the door behind her
the size of the great ilinnesota contract window expecting to see
the aggregate totals or 1830 barely
reached these figures We are lavish
and extravagant with our lumber now
but at the present rate of consumption
there will be precious little left to con
sume a quarter of a century hence even
making allowance for what we can draw
from Mexico
I had just hunted up a pen with a point
found my ink bottle and written at the
topofashectofpapcr DearParents
when turning I beheld a lady standing
by me She was a young woman with
the peculiarity of black eyes and very
blonde hair She was pale but beauti
ful On her left cheek was a soft brown
mole that looked at a distance like a
patch of court plaster She must have
come in a carriage for she wore no bon
net but only a large and very remarkable
cloak of some oriental fabric As I
looked at her surprised and startled
and vexed at having been caught in my
shirtsleeves certainly the last thing I
had expected was a caller she took her
scat in the large chair prepared for sit
ters and said softly
Never mind Begin to paint mc I
have so little time to stay
She was certainly a very peculiar per
son in hermanncraswcllas in her looks
but she was very winning nevertheless
Moreover she seemed to compel me do
as she demanded
I happened to have a new canvas of
the size on which I usually painted half
length portraits and I placed it upon my
easel and rapidly sketched in the head
and figure The work fascinated me
When the first painting was accom
plished and I could do no more until it
had dried I signified as much and at
this she rose and stood before the can
vas
It is good she said Now look at
me well I may not be able to come
again Store every line and feature in
your memory and if I do not return fin
ish the picture It will be well worth
your time and trouble Do not forget
this little mole on my cheek Do not
forget how I wear my hair Do not for
get this ring upon my hand
She smiled gave me a little bow
opened the door passed through it and
I ran to the
the carriage
space of three days placed it upon the
easel and taking my brush began to
work upon it I had been requested to
finish it whether the lady came to sit or
not Usually this would have been im
possible but the vivid memory that I
retained of her features her coloring
and her costume was astonishing
For nearly a fortnight I worked upon
the picture without a model bet when
it was completed I felt sure that it was
an excellent likeness It wa3 certainly
the best picture I had ever painted I
fcaitcd for the lady in perfect confidence
that she would return but she never
came and at last I ceased to expect
herThe
The picture was not six months old
when the academy exhibition opened I
had had a remittance from my father
and had resolved to fight a little longer
before I returned to the farm One or
two little bits of work which had brought
me pecuniary profit had fallen lo me
and I was more hopeful I framed my
portrait sent it to the academy and to
my great astonishment found it accepted
and hung upon the line Moreover the
critics praised it friends called to con
gratulate me The portrait of a lady was
a great success and I felt that it had
been of more advantago to mc to keep
than it would have been to sell It But
the end of the story had not yet come
Toward the close of the exhibition I re
ceived a nolo from a lady who declared
herself very ill and quite unable to call
upon me
She begged that I would come to see
her on ft buiisess matter and of coune
I went
Atplondld mansion is Fifth avenue
TTM the old Istyt home ss4 sb
is so f srfect a likeness that I fainted
when saw it and bavo since been very
ill 1 fill you tell me sir who tho lady
may b t who so exactly resembles my lost
daugh erf I would give worlds to see
her t wish to beg that you msy copy
her po trait for me
I de iberated a moment and then de
cided o tell the exact tiuth
I io not know tho ladys name
madan I said The picture is painted
chiefly from memory and then I de
scribee my sitters visit and repeated
what s le said
As I spoke the old lady grew greatly
interes d When I had finished sho
claspe < her hands together and cried in
much ixcitcmcnt
Mj friend you may think me insane
but I c innot help it Your strange guest
was no living woman She was the spirit
of my c aughter She knew how I longed
for her likeness and came to you to paint
me one If you doubt me I have proof
Sarapb ing me the cloak and bracelet
I em a painter rhe name upon my
studio door is familiar to the fashionable
world and I have painted the portraits
of many of tho four hundred I am in
vited to receptions too and guests are
brought up and introduced to me by im
portant gentlemen who inform them that
1 painted that wonderful likeness of Mrs
S I always conscientiously en
deavor to make the best picture I can
But as I never forget to make a matron
at least fifteen years younger than she is
and to omit every crowsfoot line and
wrinkle that years have traced upon her
face a guilty blush comes to my own
when the mendacious stranger repeats
Wonderful likeness wonderful Jlrs
S to the life For my own pleas
ure I often sketch rugged and character
istic faces old faces worn faces but
never to hang in the drawingrooms of
the rich who all desire to bo smooth and
smiling and to look as though they had
jiaid timo to forget them
My portraits however did not hang
on the walls of rich men when this
story begins I had never yet had one
accepted at the academy and I had be
gun to believe that I never should I
had canvases galore on which the jani
tress and th8 little match boy the laun
dress and tho bootblack figured con
spicuously They stood with theirfaccs
turned to the wall about the room But
orders I had had none since I had paid
my tailor s bill in a fulllength family
group of himse f his wife and his six
children This sort of thing you may
imagine did not pay well and I had re
solved to go lack to Corndell where
they would receive mo with open arms
and kilt the fatted turkey for my sake
To go back and take to farming and
try to like Marie Jane Pell whose
fathers farm was near to ours as I had
so often been requested to do by my
mother
Certainly I could never ask Stella
JJope with whom I was tremendously
in love to marry me under
such
circumstances to be a
farmers wife and milk cows and make
i
out worimg more thin t rentyiive oars Butter 1bte > ia w no nad graduated atr
in the year In fact on seme of these j Vassar and was so brilliant and so stylish
eelved me in her private room attended
only tyher maid
You are very good to come to me
she sad It is your picture in tho
acadeny your portrait of a lady that
I wish to speak to you about Many of
my frisnds have been to sec it and they
all pit nounccd it a perfect portrait of
my da ighter who died at sea many
years t go My maid has seen it she has
the sat le opinion I went to tho aca
demy he other day to see it myself It
ang lady wears in the picture
ha nett tbe room sl10 returned
gij0n0jjrment lhat closely resembled
bracelet on
UIUUI JUJUU
She wore them that I might be sure
of her the said She bad little of
her narlrobe with her Most of it was
left at lx > mc The cloak was a great
favorite of hers It came from Japan
The bra elet we bought abroad Oh it
was my Lclia who came and I must buy
thepictirel
Yes I really do think madam is
right laid the maid with a courtesy
For th ires tho little mole on her cheek
and the way she has with her hair that
was too ong to do like every ones
I mysilf was now almost convinced
that I ha 1 painted a ghost and cold chills
began tc run down my back and my hand
trcmblec
You will sell it to ma asked tho
old lady
Certiinly madam I replied
The 0 d lady spok to the maid who
brought her a cneckbook The sum
she oiler id was an immense one and I
was not idiot enough to decline it She
gave me her hand when I left her and
offered lie her benediction When tho
cxhibitic n closed tho picture was sent
to her h < use
I was now beginning to be known and
patrons cere plentiful My studio was
in a mors fashionable part of the own
and I thought no more of turning
farmer nnd felt quite sure of marrying
the girl > f my choice very shortly as in
deed I did
The slory of the ghost who sat for mc
had somehow got about and I told it
frequent y with some additions to my
sitters It gave me quite a little notori
ety for he old lady was well known in
the fash enable circle and there could
be no djubt that the picture was her
daughteis likeness
Three or four years had passed sines
that strange sitting when one day I was
working at my easel giving the finishing
touches t > a picture when a hand touched
my shoulder I turned and saw a lady
with blaik eyes and golden hair looking
at me She did not wear the Japanese
cloak thi J time but a coat that jjsygjj
a0 5 ytoheaAjCT cantiful
J little bonnet but it all vJtf
was myipint
same Whit have yon thought of me sho
said She was of tho earth earthy
solid fla h and blood No doubt of that
If she hi d materialized she had done it
thoroughly My answer popjed out of
my mou h without a thought
I thjught you a ghost said I
Ahf I came and vanished like one
said she The company went to Aus
tralia vy unexpectedly to mc But I
hope ycu finished my picture I want
some photographs of it for the windows
I told y < u to go on with it you know I
tnought youd write when it was done
I did not know your name madam
said I
II
I thought every one knew me said
she Mademoiselle Rosalie of the
Comic Opera We were making such a
sensation in our opera at the time I
was har ng my hair dressed on the floor
below when I ran up to sit for you and
I thougl 11 left my card Now did you
finish ths picture I hope
As shn spoke I looked at the handsome
singer Either she had grown much
coarser or I had idealized her She
bore o ily a slight likeness to my
portrait of a lady after all it seemed
to me iut she was plainly goodnatured
I beggcil her to be seated and gave her
the bistt ry of her portrait
It is all very curious she said and
very tcuching I would not rob the
dear oil lady of her delusion for the
world Of course every one has one of
those Japanese robes and snake bracelets
are common and who knows if I look
the leas like the poor girl Imagina
tion doc I wonders But you can paint
me agaii in another pose and another
costume No one will ever recall the
portrait in the academy and we will
keep th secret
Wc d d To this day no one but my
wife kn < ws that the ghost that gave me
my first helping band to fame and
fortune was the well known singer
rn fnr W1V rUnbtt hnt f drive awayhut itjwa alreadv gonclfl demoselle Rosi
15F <
lady could nave walked in
An ingenious system of rapid trans
portation has been devised by Lieutenant
Chase United States Army whereby it
Is anticipated that California fruit will
be placed in Eastern markets in Ies than
fortyeight hours after it is picked
Lieutenant Chase terms his scheme The
Electric Elevated and it is a cableway
mounted oh rigid uprights with balloon
like reservoirs to reduce the weight of
tho trains and the friction weil nigh to a
minimum The motive power will be
electricity and to the top of each car
will be attached a reservoir chargedwith
hydrogen gas These reservoirs will bo
built of the strongest material stiffened
by a system of alumnium rods and made
impervious to gas The gas will lift the
load to so great an extent that there will
be but little dead weight compared to
tbe two Rnd onehalf tons which the
ordinary railway is forced to carry for
every 200 pouads load The Electric
Elevated fa going to be experiment 1
with on a twentymile track built either
out of Chicago or St Louis and it may
be made one of the novel featuresof the
Worlds Fair
such a dress
I put my canvas in the sun and after a
Rosalie of the Comic
Ledger
Origin of the Chestnut Sorrel
Evei hear the story said a well
known iport to The Man About Town
of the irigin of the appellation chest
nut snroil as applied to horses of a cer
tain colar Well away out in the
mountains of West Virginia in years
gone by there lived a very eccentric old
man nancd Deems Eli Deems who
occupied a log cabin surrrounded by a
few acre I of land which he managed to
plant in corn and turnips every year
assisted by his wife and an old horse
This hor ic was pressed into service by a
squad o cavalry during the war and
ridden si 1 hard that his back was badly
hurt by an old saddle When Eli got
his horse home again he set to work doc
toring hi 1 back but all to no avail the
sore got irorse and worse until Ei was
advised 10 shoot the animal No said
he Ill bo dodgastcd if I do Ill turn
him out in the chestnut flats and sec
what nal ar will do for him
Aboi t five years afterward I met Eli
near his tome while out hunting one day
and I mi ds special inquiry about his be
loved ole horse did he die or get well
Eli took me down to his rail pen stable
about ha f a mile from where we stood
and without saying a word pointed
with pan lonable pride to tho same old
horse a little older and grayer but still
quite a p ug On his back was the queer
estlooking wooden saddle I had over
seen and wh n I asked about it Eli an
swered ire thus Chestnut burr fell in
that old varsore took rootgrowed into
a tree 011 of which I made the rails to
build Pels this stable an then I whit
tled the 1 tump down to the saddle you
see on Mi > back an I reckon itll last as
long at nien Nancy air able to ride ole
P S9 to lUllifl LHJ l
WORDS OF WISDOM
wins tho soul
J
Few men succeed who tryiio get a
head
A really sharp man seldom finds life a
grind
No diploma 13 required to nursb a ro
tentment h
Charms strikes tho sightiumt merit 1
Charity is tho virtue of thejfieart and
not of the hands gst Ulte a wom1
Charon is the only fcrrymfgwho neve TtoUnSn
stops on account of
fog fss Assoine
atman
Occasions do not make frail u therms
but they show what he is Hiseyesv
Men are just as ready to halo you for
your virtues as for your faults
When
HerwUIisntJ
Her wont isJuS
ClaraJ Denton t
you bury animosity dont set acbitical case
up a headstono over its
graver nr
mT
has swallowed one 01 my
Jimmicboy
Tomorrow is the mirago of time and said Rondow in despair
procrastination its willing victim afg all right said tho doctor
Minutes are the poor mans small Mush is good fo children
change it will pay him to hoard them I
Be not ashamed of thy virtue honor TUB rEBX TOIS0
a gocd brooch to wear in a mans hat ejj aCss T ° ppui This piece of ribbon
all times as made to order Theres not another
No soul is desolate U like in theworW
as long as there is
a human being for whom it can feel tru f
and reverence Jj
Education is the only interest wortlS
Miss Hoppin Im going shopping
lend it
morrow and I wish youd to
1 to match Pud
111112 f
° PAST ES0C0B ra c0 scla < CE
thou tfu l man
ml Irata Customer You said this cloth
What is remote and difficult of success W a fast color yet it faded out in two
wo are apt to overrate what is
really
weeks after it was made up i
bestir us lies always within our reach er Well I dont think5you
thonsKoiten overlooked s v cxpect it to Iado anyfasterthan
OSS nlmr = ro ja Bsst
titil
til I
tion 1 1 jjr >
That sovereign has a little mind who
seeks to go down to posterity by means
of great public writings It is to confide
to masons and bricklayers the task of
writing hbtory
Human life is like a game of chess j
each piece takes its place upon the chess
board king knight bishop and pawn
Death comesthe game closes and all ar
thrown without distinction or rank J
into the same bag
Wonderfnl
Armless 3fen
Bulwerin his Artificial Changeling
makes mention of one John Simons a
native of Berkshire England born with
out arms or hands who could write with
his mouth thread a needle tie a knot
shuffle cut and deal a pack of cardsetc
This wonderful personage wa3 exhibited
in London in 1GS3
Stowe gives an account of a Holland
er born without arms who while oaexl
hibition in 15S1 exhibited surprising
feats of activity such as flourishing a
rapier shooting an arrow at a targetetc
John Sear a Spaniardalso born with
out arms was exhibited in London dur
ing the reign of King William He
could comb his hair share himself fill j
glass thread a needle emlfrpideff fr
six differenl 7ferSt handwriting
and play 6n several different kindr of
musical instruments with his feet and
toesBut
But TVilliam Kingston of Ditchheat
Somersetshire England was the most
wondejful of M that wondrous crew
Concerning him a writer of the London
CAropide says I put halt a sheet of pa
Per > with pen and ink on the floor be
fore him He threw off his shoes as he
sy took the inkstand in the toes of his
laft foot having been bom Without
jnrms and held the pen in those of the
right lie then wrote three fine lines
better than mo3t can with the fingew
He feeds himself and can bring both f
mimuii vi muuumS m Wfcwtnr1 < fcrJ > l
holding the fork or spoon in his toef
He showed me how he shaves
He can dress and undress himself So
is a farmer by occupation milks Ms
cows with his toes cut3 his own hay and
binds up his bundles and carries it about
the field for his cattle In saddling and
bridling his horso he doe3 it with his
teeth He is so strong in his
teeth that he can lift ten pecks of beans
with them and he can throw a hammer
as far with his feet as most people caa
with their hands St LouU Jhpuilie
Railroad Cripples I
Down in the district of town known
as Wall street a distinguished railroad
official said recently a number of sturdy
men move about on crutches Thiy
have all their arms and legs their facts
are as a rule the faces of men whose Ibis
are not too hard they do not sport tio
Grand Army buttons If you watch them
you see that they do not rely very greatly
on their crutches that tho crutchesto pe
sure are always under the arms in tbe
right position for use but that they e
used very seldom One of the crutch
bearers will stand and talk to a friend
holding the crutches entirely off the side
walk nnd will gesticulate with them
violently then starting on he will fct
the foot of the crutch touch ground once
in every three or four or half a doam
steps Theso gentlemen are railroad
cripples men who are suing railroad
companies for alleged damages they go
around with crutches so that they tan
swear on the witness stand without toe
great a straining of their consciences tltat
they were on crutches for six months
after the accident on account of whxh
they are suing iVeto Tori Sun
HcaUhfulneS3 or tho Electric Light
The healthfulness of the electric light
was recently illustrated in a striking
manner Some railway men were dis
cussing in a car factory the relative d
Srautages of illumination by gas and c
iy and the adyn tes of iK
remained unconvinced by tue
Finally tho superintendent of the fat ry
suggested that the matter could eisFy bo
put to a practical test and turning on
the gas in tho smoking compartmenj of
an adjacent car he invited the officials
inside It is said thrir stay was of he
briefest for in a very few minutes even
the strongest of them bad to succumb to
the heat and oppression and to seek the
outer air A like test made In a com
partment lighted by electric incandes
tcnts was attended by a very different
result and the verdict which followed
ivas unanimous for the cool wholesome
light This will be readily understood
by those who accustomed to clcctrio
light have occasion to sit in gas lighted
rooms ia which the sense of heaviness
sften becomes oppressive Chicago Pott
The Smallest Flower 1Iant
The smallest flowering plant accord
ing to London TidBJi is wolffia micro
icopica a native of India It belongs tc
the ducksccd family It is almost micro
scopic in size destitute of proper sicm
leaves and roots but having these organs
merged in one forming a frond There
Is a prolongation of the lower surface
tho purpose of which seems to be to en
able the plant to float upright in tho
water Tho fronds multiply by sending
out other fronds from a slit or cavity
and with such rapidity does this take
place that n few days often sufflco to pro
duce from a few individuals enough
similar ones to cover many square rods
of pond surface with the minute green
granules Small as these plants are they
bear flowers Two are produced on a
plant each of them very simple ono of
a tingle stamen and the cither of a single
plltil both of which burst throughHM
tiyptriaifsco of tho frondf
k
WILLIKQ TO OEJJCJE
John E Gett at anUmateur
musicaleVWhats he singing
Miss Van Clef Let Me Like a Sol
dier Die
Mr Gett If I had ray gun with me
ho should be gratified Pud
TIIS SIDE
Mendicant Please mister gimme
ten cents I
Tragedian Banter with dignity
Young man cross over to the opposite
side of the street I am working this
side myself Jfunuyi M edly
XT nAS LASTKO QUALITIES
Theres one thing about a tailors
bill that I admire
Whats that
Its endurance I know of one that
has been running for five years and isnt
thinking of stopping BrooUyn Life
SMALLEST OP LIBRARIES
Student Would you perhaps buy
this Greek dictionary
Antiquary I am sorry but I buy
onlywholo libraries
Studcnt Just so This book is the
whole of my library Flitjende BlaetUr
AS AHTFCL TAXDODOEn
I met Mr Knickerbocker in a shabby
coat awhile ago He has not failed has
lie
Oh no he only puts that coat on
when lie goes to the assessors to give in
his property for assessment Chicago
Sail
KOT niFHOVED BY BLESDISO
Your omelet would bo a perfect
poem my dearEthel but for one thing
What is that
You have mixed at least one cight
eenthcentnry lay with the other eggs
which are essentially modern Chicago
ArOM
A FAVOIUTF BOCTE TO HEAVES
Mr Chugwater Samantba who is
it out there in the kitchen singing I
want to bo an angel
Mrs Chugwater Thats the new
hired girl
Put the kerosene can where she cant
find it in the morning Chicago
Trilune
ZE HAD EETinED
Jennie who is not pretentious
Clara I heard you tell Mr do Smythe
last night that papa was a retired tea
merchant how could you
Clara Well he was a retired mer
chant when Mr de Smythe called hed
been snoring for two hours Belordt
JIagatine
SUE UEAST DOWEBS SOT HCSBASDS
Mrs Bleeckcr of New York The
law gives a widow her third in Illinois I
believe
Mrs Wiggcry of Chicago Oh no
I had to hustle for my third just as I
did for my first and second One cant
expect to have a husband given to one
Chicago Mas
rns tiew of rr
Snively I hear that Jaysmith forged
your name for 100
Snodgrass Yes
Snively Are you going to prosecute
him
Snodgrass No I regard it as a com
pliment that he got the money
Ji i y Weclly
rAKTICCLAIt ASD TET OBDEKED UASnl
Waiter to Bossom who has just
wiped his knife and fork on the napkin
You appear to bo very particular
sir
Blossom A person has to be particu
lar in a restaurant
Waiter What shall I bring you
sir
llossom A plate ofHasg5Sa > wS
STBICTLY BUSISESS
Bankers Daughter to fier husband
just after marriage I want all the
money John
Husband All right darling Ill
draw you a check
Bankers Daughter Nodout trouble
to do that John for I really havent
known you long enough to accept your
check Let mo have cash please
Chicago Sftui
ALL IT WAS WOBTH
Customer Ill give you a dollar for
jthat book Thats every cent its worth
Clerk I I
Customer interrupting A dollar
or nothing
Clerk Very well sir Thanks
Cashl I was trying to say that tho re
tail price of the book was seventyfive
cents but you wouldnt allow me to
Tanlee Blade
MATKDIOSIAL ITEM
Mrs Pompous There will bo a num
ber of gentlemen to tea to night Bridget
and I want jou to dress yourself neatly
as you t ill wait on the table
Bridget And is it married men that
they are
Mrs Pompous Why do you ask
that question
Bridget Sure mum its little use
to mako meself look athractivo if it is
already married they arc Texai Sift
ing
FOBCED lXDISELF OS OOOD COMFAST
Yes Charles I have determined to
give up the muse I shall write no
more
moreWit Tb9BW tbe vrctW tt J1 pwu
iHT said the doctor with tho pros
pect of a big fee rising before hin
Im that feller an Ive broke the
other arm an I come ter have it fixed on
thctfsamc terms Harpert Bazar
EISrSTErXSTEDSESS
No George our engagement must
be broken Father has failed you know
When did your father fall I hadnt
heard of it he said turning pale
He failed yesterday nnd is very much
prostrated in consequence My whole
time must be given to him now ne
needs my undivided care and attention
and though it may break our hearts
George wc must part forever
Noble girl thought George as ho
hastily grasped his hat and with his
broken heart went out into the night
Chicago 2Tacs
v
ALL IS THE FAiiE T 1
A woman on Second avenue was call
ing after a boy who was going down the
street A pedestrian who thought tho
boy might be deaf halted him and
queried
Isnt that your mother calling after
youYes
Yes
Well why dont you pay attention
Oh you dont understand replied
tho boy She hooked a dollar from
pa and was going to buy ice cream with
it I hooked a quarter from her and
am going to buy peanuts and candy
Its simply a case of the hooker getting
hooked Detroit Free Pras
DETEBMISED TO CmOLD THE BCLE9
Lordly Brakcman Madam youll
have to put that dog of yourn in the bag
gage car It cant ride in here
Lady Its down on tho floor where
it will not disturb anybody
It cant ride In this car maam I tell
you Youll have to carry it into the
next car
I would rather not carry it
Then you can lead it there cant
youlI
I dont think I canlead it
Whats themattcjijrithjour driiis
I dont believe I can drive it either
Well I can madam Im going to
drive it out of the car anyhow
Kicks the dog violently It proves
to be a cast iron dog Mercury
A GRACEFUL DESCEST
Dudeleigh Dedbroke I want some
stewed terrapins
Waitress We havent any
Dudeleigh Dedbroke Then I will
take two portions of canvasback duck
Waitress Thcieaint none
Dudeleigh Dedbroke Then you
may bring mo a dozen scalloped sea
urchins and a bottle of champagne
Waitress Weve got none of these
things
< A <
wjit Jiayj
renvoi
Waitress Corn beef hash and baked
beans
Dudeleigh How much are your
beansWaitress
Waitress Ten cents a plate
Dudeleigh Well please bring ms
half a plate Boston Courier
AssisTrsa a FnoToanArn ferformasct
Mrs Chugwater arrayed ia her best
gown was sitting for her photograph
Your expression paidon me Is a
little too severe said the photographer
looking at her over the camera Re
lax the features a trifle A little more
please Wait a moment
He came back made a slight chango
in the adjustment of the head rest then
stood off and inspected the result
Now then ready Beg pardon the
expression is still a little too stern Re
lax the features a trifle A little more
please Direct your gaze at the card on
this upright post and wink as often as
you feel like it All ready Ono mo
ment again pardon me the expression
is still too severe Relax tho
Samantba roared Mr Chugwater
coming out from behind the screen and
glaring at her savagely smile confound
you smile Chicago Tribune
A Broker In Pennies
I met the chief figure in one of the in
dustries a day or two ago It was down
town in the banking neighborhood A
thin wiry man sat in a covered wagon
that was driven by a horse that would
have a wonderful memory indeed could
he remember when he was young The
vehicle stopped before ono bank Its
driver alighted and taking a stout can
vas bag that seemed very heavy went in
side Sometime afterward he came out
empty handed and drove to another
bankl This time he took in an empty
canvas bag and came out with it well
filled and heavy
Surely there was something mysterious
here So remarked to one pi tfcr
attaches of the bank
Oh thats all right ho replied in
his lordly way thatsa money broker
The explanation was a trifle vague
but later I found out what tho penny
brokers business was It is not set
forth in the directories but this is what
it is in plain English
The penny broker buys and sells money
of the lowest denomination He docs
not deal in stocks cares nothing for
margins and neither negotiates for or in
any manner deals in loans or anything of
that sort His plan of business is very
simple On each Monday tho penny
broker makes a round of certain churches
and calls upon tho pastor thereof On
that day tho managers of the financial
affairs of those churches havo on hand
more pennies and nickels and tho like
than they know what to do with
Well the penny broker buys up these
penuic3 at a discount of course It
would cost time and trouble for the
church managers to change those small
coins into the more convenient form of
bills Tho penny broker does this He
supplies a certain amount of bills and
takes a certain amount of pennies
In addition to the churches ho buys
pennies from banks from newspaper
offices and other places where pennies
accumulate The pennies that he buys
in this way he sells to stores to factories
to banks again that may need small
coin and in short to any business house
that may be in a line where it is neces
sary to keep on band exact change And
lie makes a profit both ways aud as he
handles a good deal of money in the
course of a year a fair share of it re
j mains with him But the business direc
tory will tell jflu little of him Sew
I Turk Sean
na by
11 years
y and enjoys
ed tho young
with which
match Sew Tori
A NECKLACE CBEiTES A SESSATIOS
An Empresss necklace has been
creating quite a sensation in Madrid for
its beauty and its great value as well as
for its historic ossociatons The neck
lace belonged to the Empres3 Eugene
and was a present from Ismael tho
Viceroy of Egyptwho sent it to the Em
press in 18G9 on the occasion other visit
to open the Suez Canal A few yeara
ao all the Crown diamonds and jewels
were put up to auction by tho Republic
Among tho buj crs was a jeweler from
iladrid who bought the necklace be
cause the Empress Eugcno was a
Spaniard by birth The necklace con
sists of great pearls of singular beauty
and is priced at 73000 Sin Franciico
Examiner
C3IXG VELVET ECOSOMICALLT ASD WELL
Tim y < TifljM < tic 1 f yplvft gnrichas a
goTrnT s universally becoming and is
the one material that can be used with
Lace silk wool cotton etc Ribbon
velvet and grosgrain ribbon having a
satin edge arc the farorito trimming
ribbons which are put on skirts in cross
snd leugthnise rows or bridle bows
binding on the edgo of tho drapery
whether it be slashed in tabs or plain
trim panels hold a bit of drapery hero
and there in a rosette edge the basque
ending in rosettes back and front hold
the lapped basque fronts with rosettes
trim collars in onepointed tab on each
side form bretclles trim the wristshold
the fullness of sleeves in tight little bows
on the outside of the arm and trim tha
front of the basques irregularly as threa
straps on one side and two or four on the
other coming diagonally across tha
front The cabbagerosettes spoken of
are used on ladies and childrens dresses
and hats They must be looso and fluffy
to be a success If made of ribbon tako
thirty inches of No 12 or No 10 ribbon
gather along one edge aud pull it up to
form the loose rosette catching it light
ly here and there in place If made of
piece silk or velvet cut a bias strip two
inches and a half wide when doubled
gather the two raw edges as one draw
the fulomup and form the rosctto as
described for thei btSiir and tako a
strip the width of the velvet LadUi
Ihme Journal
WOMAS KOT TUB WEAKER VESSEL
Among savages tho woman is just as
healthy as the man Considered as an
animal from a physiological staudpoint
a woman is capable of more hard work
of enduring more hardship deprivation
and disease than a man A woman will
endure where a man will succumb and
break down entirely She is not natu
rally the weaker yesscl and certainly in
6ome respects a womau is constitutionally
the superior Out of an equal number
of male and female infants there will bo
found at the end of the first year of life
a larger number of girls alive than boys
jjvifjips tp statistics T djiirepancy
continues up to the agu HH en or six
teen when the mortality beEomea great
est among tho girls At the age of forty
or fifty the death rate is about equal in
both sexes and finally the oldest in
habitant is always a woman thus show
ing that her constitutional fund of vi
tality is naturally greatest It is some
times argued that a woman is naturally
weaker and inferior because the average
weight of her brain is from four to six
ounces less than that of the average
man and that thus her intcllectuil
quality is less as well as her physical
But when tbe size of a womans brain is
considered in comparison with the weight
of her body it is evident that a woman
has more brain per pound than a man
and if that be a proper standard of com
parison then woman is the superior
There is no physical reason why a wo
man should be more feeblo or diseased
than a man Stanley was furnished with
two hundred African women to carry his
stuff into the interior of Africa and he
found them the best porters he had em
ployed although he felt very doubtful
about accepting their services when first
proposed The Hexican Indian woman
is able to carry her household goods on
her back with two or three babies on top
when a change of location is desirable
Meanwhile her husband trudges bravely
along carrying his gun On the conti
nent of Europe most of the heavy work
is done by women In Vienna women
and dogs are frequently hitched to
gether and sometimes a woman is yoked
with a cow to draw a load of produce to
the city Many of these peasant women
will carry upon their heads a load of
vegetables that few American men could
easily lift These women have tho mus
cles of tho waist and trunk thoroughly
developed Despite their hardships
they do not suffer from the backache or
ether ailments which the women who
dress fashionably are constantly afflicted
with Phrenological Journal
FASIItOS KOTE3
Mnurnin nancr has a black comer
onlyThe
The corslet is becoming to almost any
figure
Satin has made a great advance in favor
of late
Black dotted veils are at the height of
fashion
Undcrslecvcs of chiffons arc put in all
silk gowns and robes made with hanging
or angel sleeves
The new perfumes and powders are
put up in rich cutglass bottles of unique
shape having silver tops
Venetian and Watteau effects are em
ployed at weddings making them more
brilliant pageants than ever
Bridesmaids dresses for children from
ten to fourteeu are made in white cloth
with an abundance of stitching
The 6ailor hat bobs up serenely among
spring head coverings and although it
cannot be heard it is suro to make itself
feltThe
The new Freneh silks are shown in
corded grounds strewn with figures in
brocaded or shot effects or striped with
satinChiffon
Chiffon tans are novel though costj
and fragile They can bo made to match
any evening gown but in white they art
very dainty
The new colors in silk3 for evening
comprise laurelpink a clear rose color
rose de Noel a pale oldrose and bright
Bengalrose
Neat little spoons come from Salem
which from their ornamentation of
witches and pins are called witch
spoons Those made for eating oranges
are lined with gold and arc shaped ljka
scoops ryith pointed cads
Every cloud has a silver lining
But little one Is it hard to Co < lf
Is It hard to know tho sun is shinia
Behind the clouds there alt the time
You cannot see it Well no my dearie
Yon cant see Godbut you know Hes thf r
Then stop your crying and grow more cheery
Inside at least wo can havo it fair
Ah little girl with tho tearful lashes
Patching the heavy hurrying sty
And tho slanting rain that falls in splashes
On tha windowpan 1 wouldnt cry
I wouldnt sigh and fflbk so lonely
Look at the daffodils down the walt
They hold their heads up glad If only
They grow and blossom upon their sta
Think of it dearie when it is over
And tho hidden snn comes shining ont
And the air is sweet with the smell of clover
And blithe withthe childrens happy shout
What rara mud pias all right for baling
Two small hands that I know can make
What witching puddles for barefoot wadinj
Are gathering down there by the gate I
Look at the blithesomehearted robin
Flitting about so merrily
With his saucy hood forever bobbins
And his Cheer up cheer up cheerily
Then dear lassie lets try to find it
That sUver lining behind the clonld
f know its there the suns behind it
What if tne thunder does roar loud J
What if the lightnings zigzag flashes
Do go dancing across the sky
What if the heavy shower dashes
I wouldnt care not T not I
Tnen every clould has a silver lining
It only youll try to find it love
See dear child how the sun is shining
aua nun mmmy nn tij r > 1hascl
Ilarriet FCroetrin Boston lVonscrij6
PITH APPOINT
A popular resort To judicious fib
bing
Absence of mind The disobedient
child
Loose characters often get tight
Washington Star
The few men who dont make fools of
themselves generally let some one clso
do it Elmira Gazette
The man who wa3 convicted of steal
ing furs said he was only in search of tho
missing lynx Binghamton HepuUican
Fethcrbrano wonders if tho silent let
ters of the alphabet werent taken from
the dead languages Detroit Free Press
Nobody has faith enough in human in
tegrity to believe that tho man who
guesses his conundrum has never heard it
before Elmira Gazette
lie wrote a verso on spring one morn
Received a check before the night
The Jury Urteg duly sworn
Declared that he had died of fright
Puck
Philosophy Question When a
man says that ho knows nothing h it
not an absurdity Answer That de
pends on the man Harvard Lam
poon Sometimes a woman is so flattered be
cause a guest praises the excellent quality
of her cake that she forgets to notice
whether or not ho cat3 it Somcrvillo
Journal
Minister consolingly Weep not
my poor woman Think how much bet
ter off your husband is Widow Vixen
Do you mean that for a slur Chi
cago Sews
How old is your boy Hes old
enough now not to be old enough to
know that he dont know some things
that hell know when hes a littlo older
The Epoch
She looking out of the window
italic
Wt finn yfrffau5afcff3 seem
going by us instead offiftgtlng
them He Yes This train is so
confoundedly slow Chicago Scut
Lady Ive got nothing for you
Tramp You havent eh Well youll
be sony for this If you dont give me
something to eat Iil recommend you to
all my friends between hero and the Gulf
of Mexico Terai Siftings
Softhart Is Mis3 Triplight in
Servant No but she told me to
tell you if you called that it was
very kind of you Softhart What
did sho mean Servant I suppose
she meant that it was very kind of you
j to cill when sho was our Tuc Epoch
Washingtons Grit and Grip
It is related of John Adams that when
Stuart exhibited his portrait of General
Washington Mr Adams went to see it
After gazing at it lor several minutes ho
exclaimed
Thats tho portrait of a man who
knew how to hold hU tongue which this
old fool never didl
Tho portrait does indicate that tho
originil could be reticent but it also
shows that he could control himself
The square massive jaw the full broad
based nose and the compressed lips ex
press pugnacity and passion such a3 rc
ouire a strong will to keep them in
subjection
Sometimes even Washington allowed
his passion to have sway
When Gloveri Marblehead fishermen
and Morgans Virginia riflemen were en
gaged in a rough and tumble fight
Washington leaped bis horso over the
bars of the camp fence dashed among
the rioters throw himself off seized two
brawny riflemen by tho throat and shafc
ing them nt arms length subdued not
only them but tho whole band
It t as the victory due to tomroanding
strength presence and matter Tho men
saw that they must obey and they
obeyed Sea Tori Journal
Revolted at a Diet of Terrapin
Inn letter to tho 2wrLic yeir
ago tho curiou3 fact was stated that less
than a century ago the slaves on an es
tate in Anne Arundel County Md re
volted because they were being fed too
much on terrapin Within the memory
of men now living these muchprized
reptiles sold for 1 a dozen and their
steady rise to SCO a dozen and scarce at
that illustrates their increase in gastro
nomic favor The terrapin farms that
were started in Maryland five years ago
are still maintained but a terrapin raised
in captivity even with the best of care
has not the value of ono caught yild
It lacks tho peculiar qualities Rhich
makes the dish an unapproachable de
light Fivo years ago the estimated
yield of the Chesapeake Bay way 500
000 terrapin annually This year it 13
not onefifth of that number Sea
Tori Times
m
Dentistry in China
Dr Daly remarks that Chinese teeth
are much more easily extracted thar
thoe of the Europeans Tho native
dentists are said to possess a wonderful
powder which is rubbed on the gum
over the affected tooth after an interval
of about five minutes the patient is told
to sneeze wherenpon the tooth falls out
Dr Daly has offered a reward of 8100
to any one performing the operation in
tills way in his presence on condition
that he is allowed to choose tho tooth
nnd examine the mouth before and after
ward So far no ono will consent ti
perform the operation on these condi
tions ftifi sA and Colonial Di tigqut
A nublishcd list of the Russian Czarl
personal suite shows that his 6laffC0
taiu 153 general

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