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THB BENNINGTON JBANNER, EKIDAY, MAECH 9, 1894. 3 AS FRIEND MEETS FRIEND. There is thc Same Grceiin? AH Counlrk'S. in The First Salulatlon is Invarlably an In quiry About Health The Danger of Closed Doors and Wlndows The One Cure for Neuralgla. "Uow do you do?" is the phraso nll over tho world. In overy languago the flrst grcotini; inquiries about tho health. Winter wiih eloscd doors and windows, eoal stoves and in-door llfe eudangers hoaltb, briugs a bad coudition of the blood and a lowering tono to the nervous system. "The most certain indiaUion of badly nourished ncrves," says Dr. Wier Mitch oil, "is neuralgU." ' Nothing rohs tired, aching norves of all iriitnliim liko nppropiiatc nurvo food. Paine's celery compound best meets tliis need. Neuia'lgin. rheuinaUsm, lumbago And kidney tioubles, due to poor blood, yiold to Paine's celery compound when iiothinc tlso givcs relief. MRS. L. VAJf ZUE. Mrs, L. Van Zilo of 202 Liberty Street, Pateison, N. J., whose portraitis given above, writes as follows: "I euclose you ono of tny pictures, thatyou raay show it to suffering hu inaiiity and toll wliat Paine's celerv compound is doing for mo. I am still using it, and it is doing a great work for my family. I havo rccomtnended the retnedy to scvcral snffercrs. "Am taking it for neuralgia with great beneflt." Paino's celery compound is the ono truc specifio for all diseases resulting from an impiired ncrvons system or im poverished blood. Try it. DOWN !T, OR IT WILL DOWN YOU. The Stonincli Not Easlly Dethroiied 'When Oncft It Obtulim Mnstcry. One of tho greatestmisfortunes thatcan bnppcn to n man in his eartbly cureer ls to discover that ho has n stomach. Ho may know it theoretically or recollect the Jessons in physiology of his sehoolboy days, but when he flnds out by actual, personnl experience that he has n stomach he is to be pitied. Tho whole science of gnstrono my and it is a sclencc has been dovised and perfected for the bcnefit of tha inen ivho have made this discovery. All the ttudies of tho whole glittering galaxy of fcastronoinists, all tho culinary triumphs of the great restaurants in the capitals of the world, nre due to the simple fac that men have found out that thcy have stom achs, and tbut that organ, when once dls covered, must bo petted and flattered and toothed and kept in good hnmor to prc Vent its revolting and crcating revolution and civil war. It is safo to say that the primitive man never knew that he had q stomach. It has been reserved for clvill zation to make tho discovery, nnd it is by no means a foregone concluslon that eivi lizution should pride itself upon having 3one so. The maxlm that one never enjoys a good dinner until after it has been eaten is a reflnement of lnodern nnd degcnerate days, containing much sound philosophy from a certain ntnndpoint, but thatstand point is a flctitious and mistnken one. There is no natural reaon wby a dinucr, good or bad, should bo enjoyed. Tho one object of cating is to satisfy hunger, and that being doue tho dinner should bo for gotten. It is only tho imperious and nr bitrary stomach which insists upon a fur ther recognition jf its clalms, and it is only huuuin weakness which submits to its demand. A inodern philosopher, in terso though inelegant diction, has laid down this maxim, which is nlmost idio matlc, "You must down yourstomach, or your stomach will down you."- There is more in this than will meet tho eyo of the casual readcr. Tho stomach may, ns cer tain of the ancieuts believed, be tho real seat of tho emotions, pnssions and nffec tions, but wo make a great mistake if wo subordinate the ego to n single organ, and especially to ono which is only too ready topresume upon tho favor shownitnuil the licenso given it. llealthy children know nothlng about their stomachs, ex cept that they acho sometimes if callcd on to do double duty, nnd there is, noth lng so bealthy and happy in the world as a healthy child. If children of a larger growth could but ignore the gastrio organ or forget it, dyspepsia would become n lost disease, and nll tho evils that follow in its train would disappear. San Francisco Chronicle. Do riylng Flsh Fly? A very common error mado in natural bistories whero this flsh is mentioned is that it docs not fly. "Its supposed fllght is nothing niuro than a prolonged leap. It cannot deviate from n straight lino and cannot rise a sccond time witbout en tering the water." This, briefly, is tbo sort of thing ono meets with in text books where reference is made to this flsh. The simplest way of dealing with it is the professor's method of nnswering thc query of the French academy whetber their deflnltion of a crab was correct. The story is so well known that it does not need repetition. As the result of personnl observation extending over n good many years, I assert thnt the exonetus does fly. I have often secn a flying flsh rise 200 yards off, describea semicircle, nnd meet ing the ship rise SO feet in the air perpen dicularly, at tho same tlnio darting off at right nngles to its previous course. Tben, after another long fllght, when just about to entcr tho water, tho gaping jaws of a dolphln emerging from the sea gave it pause, and it roso again, returning nlmost directly upon,its former course. Tbls.pro cedure is so common thnt it is a marvel it is not mnro widely known. A flying flsh of maturo slzecan fly 1,000 yards. It does not flap its flns ns n bird, but they vibrate, liko tbo wlngs of an in sect, with n distlnct hum. Tho only thing which tcrminates its fligbt involuntarlly J9 the drying of its fln membranes nnd their consequeut stlfTening. Chnmbers' Jonrnal. I Jl-Hurd's Fincst Jstationery at tho Bakxeji Statloncry storo. INDIANS AND LUNAT1CS. Tho Tormor'a Itespcct For tho Latter Once Saved a Yule Professor. "Ono very peculinr characteristicof the Indian," snid Major Barbour, n former plainsman now metamorphosed into n clubman nnd raconteur, "is his reverence, amounttng to nbsoluto fear in mnnyin ot.tr.cco, g' an iiiAuu per&cn. Thcy nuvur harni ono whom they bcllcve to be mentnl ly nffected. I remember one striking in stance which will illtistratc. Iwas n mem ber of tho expedition hraded by Gcueral Cnster that mado a tour through the Yel lowstone valley and that scction of tho country the yenr before the Custer mas lacre. "It was puton foot in thq interestof tci nce, nnd wo had n lot of fellows from the Cmlthsonian institutionnndnbout ndozen Ynle professors. It was a big party, com prising two nr three companiesof cavalry, one of infnntry nnd some nrtillery, so the Sioux, who at that tlme simply swnrmed ovvr that country, wero nfraid to tackle tis. Ilut they hung aroundus nll the time, and General Custer gave orders after two men who were hunting had been killed that no one should lenve camp witbout permission. "Thoso Ynle professors just worrled the Iife out of the Boldiers. Kvery professor had a detall of flve men who had to wntch him. They would go around picking up bugs nnd chnsing butterflies all over tbo prairie and would brcak up rocks nnd powwow over them with magnlfying glasses until the soldlers swore that overy man of them wns a howling idlot. "Ono day tbo worst old fellow in the crowd, n bug jloist, who wore two pnira of glasses ono .-ed nnd ono green managed in some wny or other to get out of the sight of his dctail nnd wnndered two or three miles nway. Ile ran plump into a gang of Sioux. He wnlked up to them nnd offered to shake hauds. They grabbed bim, nnd the flrst thing they dld wns to dive down into a big green bnize bag he carried. "They pulled out lizards and pieces of clay and bits of rock nnd bugs nnd thc worst nssortment of truck itnaginablc. Just about this time the old professor cnitght slght of n peculiar louking bug. He cnught it, pulled out his glass and be gan to study it. Thnt settlcd it. "An Indinn took him by the hand, led him to a hill closo by, and pointing to the army bclowsaid, 'Go.' He came bnck and snid that the soldiers totally misunder stood the Indians. 'Why. I found them the most polite nnd courteous of people,' said he to General Custer. Dut the old chief aftcrwnrd told methat they wouldn'f have had him stay in that country for nny thing on enrth." Washington Post. An Afrlcnn Pcnt. With regard to tho utility of the croco dile there aro diverse oplnions. It is cer tainly a scavenger, though when the rapid currents of most rivers nre tnken intocon slderntion the importnnce of his mlsaion dwindles. Tho nuthor of "In the Mora'n-baln-Marsh" says that along the banks of Africnn strcams it is dangerous to ap proach the river edge. Water for domestio purposes is ohtained from the top of the banks by means nf n cup nltached to a baraboo pole 20 or 30 feet in length, and iu spito of thcse prccautions the deuth roll is a most ghnstly one. The primitivo dugouts used by the nn tlves for trnyeling on the rivers nro in many cases merely deathtrnps. While t e man is paddling ulong, bnrely two inches above the surfacu of the wntcr, the croco dile scb.es his hand nnd drnga him to the bnttom. On ono occasion I sent down some let ters by n Hlndoo merchnnt, and a fow weeks later heard that both letters and postman had been devoured by crorodil-. At another time I was strolllng nlong the bank, and hcaringcries arrived at the wn ter's edge in time to seize a young boy whose leg had been caught by onoof th .e brutcsnnd torn from him. Hoescnped with his life, thanks to my timely nrrival. In.some placcs one sees thousands of crocodiles on n inud bank, most of th...i scarcely 2 inches in length, evidently jut hntched. A week does not pass but in some river villnge wails and lamentatio' are heard for a fresh victim to the croco dilo's insatiablo appetite. Youth's Com panton. IVorklni; n Rackct. Tho trnmp wns looking fairly respecta ble, nnd ns he moved along tho street a brilliant iden occurred to lilin how to work n rncket for a breakfast and he went into tho first good looking resideuce he came to and knocked ntthe front door. The lady of the house camo out. "Do you wnnt to know how to prevent motbs in carpetsf " "No," sho replied cnrtly. "Want to know how to prevent mold in flrst floor closetsf " "No." "Wantto know how to clean windows witbout water?" "No." "Would you liko tho secret of preserving the polish on fumituref" "No." He hesitated n inoraent. '.'Excuso me," he said insinuatingly, "can I get something to ent hcref " "Of coursoyou can," sho replied prompt ly. "Why didn't you say so at flrst? Go on around to the kitchcn door." And ns he folldwed her directions ho kickcd him self four times for ever letting n brilliant thou;ht occur to him how to work n racket. Detroit Free Press. Praltlne tho Chlneno Horvant. "I have had n good deal of expcrienco with Chinese labor," said Judgo Worden of Denver, "nnd my bclief is that the Chi Dese make tbo best servnnts in the world. They will do just whnt you tell them to tnd in the way that you tell them todo it. A comblnation of three vlrtues constitutes their principal fanlt-they are industrious, obedlent nnd frugnl. Hence they will do more work, do it moro willingly, do it cheaper and savo moro money than any Dther race of people. Tho differenco in tvages is not ns great as is generally repre lented, and the coolies on tho frult farms m southern Cnlitornin, whero I bavo seen noro of them than any place else, are paid ls well as slmilar labor is elsewhere. As Jiouse servnnts they nro par excellenco. They will obey tbo rules of the bousehold nd do not d"w tho lines as to what their 3utiea sball or shall not be. They can be relied upon and are not given to changing employers." St. Louis Globe-Democrat. A Klnc WIio Could Chance the AVlndf. King Erricus of Sweden publlcly con lessed that ho was a sorcerer and mngi :lan. He was the owner of an enchnnted !ap, which ho pretended enabled him to jontrol tho splrits nnd chango tho direo tion of tho winds at pleasure. So firmly did hissubjectsbelieveln thesupernatural jowers of their ruler that when n storm iroso. they vould cxclaim, "Ah, the king Is ngairi woaring his mngio capl" St. Louis Hepnbitc. If tho halr is falllne out, or turning gray, reqniring a stimulant with nour ishlnKand colnringfood, Hall's Vegeta ble Slclllan Halr Renowor is just the, speciflc. It exccls all other. Sho speaks Irom ionit exporionco. Mrs. &. 1. Moore. Jer8eyvillo, III., writes: "I can truth- fully say that Dr. Hull's CouKli fayrup ox cels all nther nroDaratlnns of a liko ua turo. We bavo used it fornver liro years anu wouiu not be without it." Typboid fevor is epidemio in sovoral towns and citles lu Connectisut. If you aro offered a bottle of Salva- tiou Oil without a wrapper, or mutilated or (U'laced, don't buy lt at any price, you may bo suro thero is something wrong it may bo a woi tliless or dangcrnus coun terfeit. Insist upon gotting a perfect, unbrokcn, genuine package, in a yellow wrapper. Be on yourguaid. Ex-President Harrlson. who is trav- eling across tho cuntinent to San Frai - cisco. is getting n veritablo ovation at -ll .1 : .;' i i . Elderly peoplo lemomber their spring uitters wun a shudder. The pies ent generation havo much - to be thank fu) for, not tho least of their blessing bo ings being such a pleasant, tlioroughly efi'ectiTO spring mcdicine as Ayer's Sar saparilla. It is a bcaltb-rcstorer and healtb-maintainer. A gang of girl countorfeiters has been uncartbed in Omaha, and two of its memhers 'are under arrest, with tne prospect of othors being eoon behiud tho bars. For all derangcments of tho throat and luugs, Ayer's Cherry Pcctoral is the spcediest and most reliable rcmedy. Even in tho advanced stanes of consump- tinn t.tttH wniiflorfiil nrptiaratinn nffnrds great rolief, checks coughing and in- uuces sieep. The Popo rofuses to condemn Henry George's books. Tho usual treatmcnt of catarrh is very unsatisfactory, as thousands can teatify. Propor local troatment is posi tivcly necessary to success, but many, if not most, of the remedies in general uso uiTurd but temporary relief. A cure cer tainiy cannot bo cxpected from snuffs, powders, douches and wasbes. Ely's Crcam lialm, which is s bighly com mendcd, is a remody which combiues tho importunt requisitics of quick actiou specillc curativo power, with perfect sufety and ple.asantness to tho patient. The druggists all scllit. Paris is pantc-stricken. Everybody carrying a parcel is suspected and watcheu by tho police. Motal boxesaie recardcd as presumptivo evidence tf evil intcntions. THE SUPEH10IUTY Of Hond's ijaiRnparilla is due to tho tro int'udous amcittut of brain work aud con- staut care used in its preparatlon. Try one bottle and you will bo convinccd of itt Kuperoilty. It purilics tne ou.ou which, the source of health, cures dys pepsia, overcomcs sick headaches aud iiilliouKiiess. It is just tho medicino for you. Hood's Pills aro purely vegetable,care fully prepared from the best ingrvdients. A dispatch irom Kittaninir, Penn., says: Tho wifo of D.ivid Koseberger, a fariner living nt-ar hcar, gave birth to five children, three glils and two boys. All tho children appear healthy and aro li'.tcly to live. TENNYSOX ON SPIUNG. Wo havo tho word of Alfred Tenuyson for it that in the spring tho young man's fancies lightly lurn to thougbts of love. It is singular that tho great laureato omitted to mcntion tho fact that it is iu tho Spring that a couBiderablo poriion of the human raco turn to take Hood's S;ir saparilla. Probably nothing but the difliculty of linding a good rhymo for that inyaluablo remedy detcrred him. him. Certain it is that tho old-timo do mestio remedies aro generally discarded in favor of tho staudard blood purifler. Elood's Sarsaparilla. which has attained tho greatest popularity all over tho country as thofavorito spring medicino. It purifies tho blood and gives nerve. mental, bodily and digestive strength. Wolves aro unusuallyilerce this winter in Russia, and advices from Saratoff givo terriblo nccniints of peatants on thoir way to tho city mavkets dnvoured by tho starving animalj. SPECIMEN CASES. S. II. Clifford, New Cassel, Wis., was troubled with ncuralgiaand rheumatism his stomach wns disordcrcd, his liver was affected to an alarming degree, ap potito fell away, and ho was terribly re duccd in ilesh and strength. Three bot tles of Elcctric Bitters ciired bim. Edward Shepbcrd, Harrisburg, 111., had a runniug soro on his leg of eigbt years' standiug. Used three bottlestof Electric Bitters nnd sovcn boxes of Bucklcn's Arnica Salvo, and his leg' is sound and well. John Speaker, Cataw ba, 0., had flvo largo fover sorcs on his leg, doctors said ho was incurable. Ono bottle Electric Bitters and ono box of B cklcn's Arnica Saltre cured him1 cn tlrely. Sold at C. D. Gibson's drug storo. Fivo cases of smallpox wero discov ored in a singlo tcnement in New York city. A nOUSEIIOLD TREASURE., D. W. Fuller of Canajohario. N. Y., says that ho always kceps Dr. King's Now Discovery in ' tho h usc, aud his family ha always found tho very best results follow its uso; that ho would not bo without it, if procurablc. G. A. Dykoman, druggist, Uatskill, N. Y., says that Dr. King's New Discovery is un doubtedly tho best Cough remedy; that ho has used it in his family for eight years and it has novor failed to do all that is claimed foa it Why not try a remedy so long tried and tcstcd. Trial bottlo frco ta C. D. Ginson's drug storo. Reg ular size 50c. and $1 00. A largo amount of smuggled opiunT has been siezed in tho Stato of Washing ton. FOtt OVEIt FIFTY YEARS. Ah Old and Wkll Tiiied Remblv. Mr Wlmlow's Boothln-; Bynip hai been used for over flftr years bymilllonsof mother for their chll dren while teetliine. with perfect success. It aoothes the cblld, softeoi tbe Rums, allays all pln, cures wlnd collc, and is the best remedy for UUrrhma. Is plea-anl to tbe taste. 8old by DrueBists lu every part of the world. Twentv. flve cents a bottle. Ita valne is Incalculable. De nre and anlc for Mre. Winalow's Soothliig Byrup. and take no other. Tho villago of Harris Citv, 10 miles west of Findloy, O., is bankrupt, and will bo appraised and sold at shoriff's salo. Nearly tho entiro village is ownod by tho exchango Bank of Ottawa, which iccently failed. Ilucklen's Arnica Salvo. Tho best Salvo in tho world for cuts, bruiscs, sorcs, ulcors, salt rhoum, fovor sorcs, tottor. chappod hands, cbilblains. corns and all oruptions, and positively crros piles or no payrcquircd. It is giarantocd togivoprfi:t satisfaction or money refunded. Prico 25o porbox, For salo by 0. D. Glbson. FEWWOMENINPETSON DOES THAT PROVE THAT THEY ARE BETTER THAN MEN? A Newspaper AVomnn Has lleen Investl catlnc the Sllbject A Penlleiitiary Warden Tells Uer Thnt tho Courts Are Lonlent, Init Slie Refuten lllm llunlly, I havo been studying prison stntlstics, and I flnd tho average proportion is 20 women to 1,000 men. In tho caso of tho Columbus (O.) penltentinry there nre only 28 women to nearly 2,000 men. At the Western penltentlary in this stnte there are 19 women to over 1,000 men. Tnlking with tho courteous warden of this lntter institution a few days since, I nsked him for his theory nnd got it with readiness. It was with a mind mado up that ho nn swcred, "It ls hirgely owing to tho lenien ey of the court that more women nre not convlcted." "But," said I, "peoplo must bo nr raigned before they can bo convictcd, nnd there nro proportionately so few women brought to trial. Either they do not vio late the law, or they are more clevcr in cov ering up their tracks, nnd this with n clev erness that nmounts to taleut, nnd even if this lnstbe truedoes there not still remain something to bo snid for them from n worhlly polnt of view? Tho Spnrtnns tnught their youth the sin wns not in steuling, but in being found out, you know." And tho warden agreed that tho Spartann wero not nll dend yet, or at least that their teachings bad lived nftcr them, but would concedo notbing to women on the ground of mornllty. Women nre something of a bothcr to most men, but to wnrdens in pnrticular, I hnv'e concludcd, nnd having known them both wisely nnd well I supposo when one such custodlnn insists thnt women of a low grnde aro worse than men of tho same grade we should nccept his judgment without questlon. But wbat I wunt to flnd out is why there are not ns many women ns men of this same grade? Warden Wright gocs furthernnd is especially posl tive tbut women in generul are not better than men, nnd thnt once bad they nre moro incorrigible, und it is his experience that there nro not bo many rcformntions among women convicts ns nmong tho men, by which wo muy iufer that women love wrongdolng. Out of thefullnessof his knowledgeMr. Wright nrgnes thnt by tho time women land in the penltentinry they nre sosteeped in Bin ns to bequite past redemption herc, and I got the impression he had not much hope of them berenfter. But let ua see nbout the iniquity of wo men. In the flrst place, there nre moro women than men in the world. Therefore if women nre more immornl than men ought thcy not tocommltnt least nnequal nnmber of crlmes? But they have not equnl opportunity. They nre not in the world ns men are, therefore nre not so beset by temptntions, is the reply. But we may deny this, since thero nre now over 500 occupations for women nnd all crowded until there is scarcely any room, even at the top, whcre as in 18S0 thero were but 40 employments in which women enrned a living. They aro now by the bundreds working shoulder to shoulder with men in nll tho professions nnd a majority of tho trades. And nre they not subjected to tbe same temptntions? It is nowqulto theexccption to find n mnn on the casbier's stool in stores and restaurants, etc, and could there he n better card towoman'shonesty? And yet it has been said women nro only given this place nnd like places of respon sibility becuuse they can bo bired for less money. So more the tcmptation to steal thcn. If women nre soprono to go to such lengths to grntify their love for dress, ns has been aseerted, would they not, unless morally better, be more likely to steal than men who nre paid a living salary and huvo less provocation? But who ever heard of awomnn running awny with' funds iutrusted to her? There Is no such curiosity on exhibltlon in the human menngcrie at the Western peniten tiary at least, though, to tell the truth, ihere is a greater one that of n borse ,hief I The mention of this frenk feminine suggests ono more "manly pursuit" ns free to women ns to men. Wby do not more women stcnl horses? They ndmire them, and surelyn stolcnhorso isworth ns much Dwned orsold to awomnn who would steal as to a man? And nre not w.omen ns clevcr with the pen? Then why not Jano tho penman as well as Jim? Yet how seldom wo hcar of women forgijigl Prison reports the country over foi 1891-2 show nn alarming increase in the population of such institutions, but such statistics do not show a proportionate in creaso in crime nmong women. One of the propelling forces leading to criminality upon which tho nuthorities are quite agreed is "tho dcsire to live beyond legiti mnte means, " nnd ever since women begnn wenring "storo clothes" they have been nccused of this very thing. Why, then. do they not steal to gratify this desiro ns their brothers do? Through the courtesy of the warden I was pcrmitted to visittho womnn'sdepart ment of tho Western penltentinry. So far ns I know I then stood for tho flrst time fnce to fnce with a criminnl of my own sex. I nssuro all who havo not had tho ex perience that it is n painful one, even though one cannot fully realize the situa tion just nt the time. That cbaracter can be rcad in tho countennnco hnd up to thnt timo bucn n pct theory of mliie. It has been exploded. Thero tbeysat in tho lightsewing room, working nway as demurely nnd iudustri otisly nnd nppnrently ns contentedly ns if st a boarding school. Smiling nnd good humored, too, ns if never n thought of evildoing hnd crossed the mind. Thero were pink nnd white blonds, tho soulful blue eycs ono reads nbout, and clear skin ned brunettcs, with the equnlly fetcblng dark eyes of thnt quality commonly called mournful, but whether blonds or brunettes I think tho most expcrt observor, without bavlng known they were criminals, could not havo gucssed it, nor could he have plckcd out from the lot thoso having had murder in their hearts oron their hands. Meg in Phihjdelphia Times. I'roved It. "My wife will bear witntss," said the Drisoner nt the bar. "thnt nt the vcrv time kI am nccused of burglarizlng Mr. Smith's premises I wns engagcd In walking the floor with my infant cblld in my nrms, endeavoring to sootho it by singing 'Rock-a-by, Baby.' " "Tho prlsoner is dis charged," rcmarked his honor. "Ue can prove a lullaby." Ram's Horn. Whnt Sho Forcot. Visltor So you havo n little baby broth er? Littlo Girl Ycs'm. I prayed for n lit tle baby sistcr, but I s'pose tbo nngels had run outof girl bnblcs. Iforgot totcll them there wnsn't any hurry. Good News. Tho marvelous success of Hood's Sarsaparilla is based upon the corner stonoof absoluto merlt Tako Hood's thronghout tho spriDg monlhs. The Fostmuster'a Sabterfuge. "Ono of tho most pnthetic scenes thnt ever camo under my observation," eaid a Bouthernor, "wns at a country storo on .tho Big Sandy river in West Vir ginla. I wns there as a epecial postof fice inspector and was sitting in .tho storo ono bitterly cold night. A feeblo old wonian, vearicj; a thin calico dress and n fadcd sunbonnet, camo in timidly, as if feuringbad news. 'Idon'treckon you nin'tgot nothin forine,' she said to tho storekeeper. ' Yes; I've got n letter, ' and tho old woman clutched it to her bosoui as if it was tbo deurest thing on earth to her, nnd with a quick step horn of bappiness sho rfalked out. 'I wrote that letter inyself, ' said tho storekeepor to mo. 'Her sonwent down tho river on a raft three years ago and was drowued. Tho old wonian could never understnnd that tho boy was dead, nnd she writes to him every week, just backing her let ters, "MyBoyBill, Down tho River." It hurt her so not to get any answers that every week I write to her and sign Bill's nnnie.' " St. Louis Qlobe-Deuiocrat. A Kovcl Use For Crnnks. "The only way todisposeof the crank question," said the man with tho long hair nnd soiled sbiit front, "is to arrest all suspicious characters, examino them, nnd overy ono who don't know tho dif ferenco between right and wrong confine him perpetuallyin tho courthouses" "What for?" nsked tho prosecuting attorney. "What for? Under modern legal re quiremcnls where I repeat vvhore would you find such a petit jury?" Cleveland Plain Dealer. A Foky Old Place. Lady Betty (prond of old ancestral mansion, whero tho family havo lived over since tho reign of Henry VIII) Just fancy what papa's having donel Ho's having tho elcctric light put inl Prosaic Sister-in-law (from Chicago) 1'm real glad to hear it. It'll be tho tnaking of the place. London Puncb. Ho Wantcd to Flnd Out. A littlo boy whoso experience with el vators had bfen n very limited ono wns brought to the city by his mamma. and in the course of two or threo hours' shopping tno little lellow wns tnken' up nnd down in ditlercnt stores n good manv times. Finnlly tbe two went to nn oflice bnild ing, took chairs in a rattier small room and waiteu. ' 'Whero arewenow.mamma?" nsked the boy. "In Unclo Rob's offlce." He glanced urouud tho rather contracted qunrtcrs und then nsked: "When does it go up?" Pittsburg Chronicle. Ttlonoy. Professor White When did money flrst como mto use? Brown Tho exnct date isn't known. sir, but it wns subsequentto the failureof the tower of Babel. Professor White Indccdl How did you learn thnt? Brown By inductive nnalysis.sir. Mon ey talks, and everybody has always under- stood its language. Knte Field's Wash ington. A Waste of Money. "Oh, misery!" crled the editor. "Whnt's the mntter now?" "I just tbrew n poet out of the window, nnd his wife, who wns waiting for him be low, has presented ono of our insurance coupons nt the cashier's desk. Ho hnd it on himl Another 100 gone, wh'en S shil lings would hn ve bought not only his poem but his everlasting gratitude." London Tit-Blts. A Curlous Oath. The following curlous oath was until re cently administered in the courts of the isle of Man: "By this book, and by the holy contents thereof, nnd by the won derfnl works that God has miraculously wrougut in heaven above and in the earth benenth in six days and seven nights, I do swear that I will, without respect of favor or friendship, lovo or galn, consangnlnity or nfflnity, envy or mnlice, execute tho laws of this isle justly between our sovcr eign lord the king nnd his subjects witbin this isle, nnd between party nnd party as indlfferently as tho herring's backbone dothllein themiddleof tbe flsh." Ex chango. Ynwnlnc. There are n great many things nliont brenthing thnt people do not hnpnen to know. Yawning, which is the relief that tbe lungs take when the air comes too slowly, ls a necessary act and is, like ev erything designed by nnture, for an excel lent purpose. It is beneflcial to catarrh and to nll aff ections of the throat. It dis tends the musclea of the throat and nose. Argosy. Has made many friends. t Why? Because it is the best and cheapest lini-; ment sold. Itkillspainl iSMMTIOPILi issold by all dealersfor2Jc Suhslltutes are mostlv cheao imlta- tions of good articles. Dont tslte them. Insist on getting Salvation O Oil, or you will be disappointcd. PUCIAf LANGE'S PLUGS, The Great Tobacco bnCW Antidotel Prlce 10 CU. At all dealer. HURD'S STATIONERY It's theBest HURD'S STATIONERY It's Ihe Best. HURD'S STATIONERY It's tbe Best HURD'S STATIONERY-Ifs theBest HURD'S' STATIONERY It'e theBest A Inrgc Llnc. BANNER STATIONERT STORE I Has made many friends. MARCH, APRIL, MAY. March, April and May aro tho archea of a brldge which bind the season of lco to that of roscs. Thereforo the spring is a 'rying tlmo for tho averago person. The system at this season of tho ycar simply needs cleansing; rcmove the im purfties from the blood, cure that grow ing troublo, constipation, and you wiH bn ablo to battle with the cnming season in perfect health. Dr. David Kennedy'y Favorite Remedy, more than any other medicino will do this for you. Itv will purify and dissolvo the exccss of uric acid in tho blood, dispel that worn out feeling, mako you sleep and tat well. It is prescribed by physlcians overy whero for just this purpose. Druggists sell it for $1 a bottle. Eslabrook's Granite & Marble Work? MAIN RTHEET. NEXT TO NEW EXPRIS' OFFICEANnOPPOSITE lt .NATION Ah BANK, J1ENNINOTON, VT. Having bought the busi neaf, Ftock. tools, etc, of tne liennine'on MonumtBl-. al Works, so callcd, locstcd as above deccribed and ea gaged practical werknxn In both granite and marole, we are prepared to fumlsli 3L etery woj-k, either TabletN dnl Aloniimenls Vaults sr Temb in either granite or Wa marble. Domestio or for. HDi elen, and set tbe same com tM plete on customer's lot h tlie, cemotery in any part of pricea and guaranteed flrst fjH, Fences, Gates, etc, for ";Wf ccmetery rnclosnres. and would solicit coirespond ence with cemtery assodti tioni. wbo con'emplate such work. We also fir nish Coptng, Pipe Fence or olhn" enclosurca fer IndlvldURl lots. We handltt North lltvcr Blue Pton, Marble and glate In car loads for walks, curblng. eto. Ali ou- heavy work which is to be set at poln's at a distance from Bennington fct flnlshed a the quanlcs, wnere we have a praett cal quaryman and granite cutter in charge of a gang of men, and shlpped direct to nearest rail roaddepot to the cemetery where it ls tcbo cet, In carload lots at speclal rate In this way w savethecustomerS.tolOpercent.in cost of hU work. Mr. E. Estabrook bas bad an eiperience of 9 years selllng and setting morumental work, das Ing wliich time he has traveled through tha Eastern, Miiidltand Western States,and will con tlnue to do so; so that if paitles In any cart of tho country wUhing work will drop bim a line.on bls next trlp through their town he will call aof show designs and glve prices. Mr. F II. Esta brook. his son, who is a practical granite cutter. will have charge of the shop at 'tcnmngton, and partles calllng there can see designs and get prices. We hope by striot attention to buslnew aud fu-nlshlng E'Jod work at reasonable prices, merit and recelve your patronage. E. LSTABItOOK, Manager. F. II. E81ABROOK,8ec'yand Treae. Kf sldence 230 Unlon Street. WATERMAN'S IDEAL FOUNTAIN PEN Writes as easyas any pen; does notblot; ALWAYS ready for use. Chauncep M. Depew, Rev. Lyman Abbott. (Rw. Leonard W.Bacoa. Rev. Tbos. E. Beecher. "It is I u.u. Kato Field, the best;Hon. Wm.E. Gladstone, Foun tain Pen Says: Col. T. M. Higginson, Qliver WpndellHolmes, Hon. John D. Long, John Wanamaker, Gen. Alex. S. Wehb. Hon. Carl Schurz, Rev. Heher Newton, and thonsands of others. C. A. PIERCE & CO. Sole Agents for Bennington Connty. CallafBanner Stationery Storo and ezamine a fnll line. OOMMISSIONERS' NOTIOE. Estato ot IIAURIET ARM6TRONU Tbe underslgned, havlug been appointed by the Hon. Pnbate Court for the district of Ben nington COM MISSIONEItS. to receive, examine and adjust all clalms and dcmands of all person. againsttne estate OI narriet Armstronp.late or llooslck. Htate of New York. dcc'd and all claim exbiblted in offsf t theret", hereby glve notice tnat toey wiu meet ror tne purposes arorcsaiu at llic Countv Clerk's offlce In Bennington. Vt. on the 17th diy of Iarch and 18th day of Aug. nezt, from ten o'clock, a. m., until four o'clock p m.,eai-hof said day. and that six months fiom tbeSStuday ofFeb, A. D., 18111, is thetlme Hmlt"d by said court for said creditors to present their clalms to us for examtnation and allowance. Dated at Bennlneton.thls SSthdav of Februarr A.D.,1894. HENIIY Ij. STJI.LSON, . HAIUtYT. CU8HMAN, 7 Commlssloneri. CIOMjnSSIONER'S NOTICE. . Estate of CA1UAHINE HARLAN. The underslcned. havlnc been aDuolnted br the Hon. Prohate C.urt lor the District of Iten nlneton, COMMISSIONERS, to recelve. exomics and adjust all clalms and demar.ds of all persons sgalnst the estate of Catharine (IlarUn late of Bennington, in said dNtrfct. dtceased. and all clalms exhibltnd In offset tht-reto, bercby gtre notice that we will m t for tbe purposes afore sald, at Mortlmer Culllton's storr in Bennington, on the 10th day of March and Kth day of June, next, from 2 o'clock nntil 4 o'clock p m, eaeh of said davs, and that six m'onthi from the Kth dayofDec. A D., 1893.i the time llmlted bv said Court.for s-.ld crrditorsi to present their clalms to us for examlnatlon and aimwance. Dated at Bennington this IVth day of Febru. ary, A.D.,1894. MORTIMER CriLUTON, S Commtsslonen. NO MORE CONSUMPTION of tho LUNGS, Ifyou tako Antl-Tubprculin LungBalhs at your own home for the pre vention nnd cure of thh terrible diease No rhargo tor treatmtnt. Nr Inconvenience or detention from bustness. 0 package" Antl.Tubrrculln sent prepald on rv celpt of Flve Dollars ($5.00). (1 his qnnntlty tisU allyeffects acurej ENDORSED3V TIIEBKST PUY8ICIANR IN EOROPE. Sold only by AMEUICAN LUKU BAT1I CC v.. Ctl 1U1 Barry Are., Chicago, 111. !, Vissai