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Washington statesman. [volume] (Walla Walla, Wash. Terr.) 1861-1864, December 13, 1861, Image 1

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn84022799/1861-12-13/ed-1/seq-1/

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Friday morning. N. Noxfrnor, R. B. SMITH,
R. R. Russ, Editors and Proprietors.
fl’ Oflice—Msin Street, Walla Walla, W. 'l‘.
,W 3‘ V runs or SUBSCRIPTION:
flew” 00
8 nths2 50
Single c0pie5.............................._:.....25
suits or anvnmrsma:
‘One square Stan lines or less) four insertions. .86 00
For each ad itionnl insertion......... . . . . ......1 00
Onesqusre per year,.........................20 00
Yearly advertisements of 2 sqs. or more, pr sq. .16 00
Hslfyearly, per5quare.......................12 00
FA“ advertisements of half column or more
wi 1 be inserted by special contract.
[3" Advertisements to ensure insertion, must be
handed in as early as Thursday, nnd the number of
insertions desire should be noted on the margin,
\otherwise they will be mntinned until forbidden.
Boom CARD, AND Jon ram 11-516 ‘lC’E'
——-Main street, Walla Walla.
The proprietors beg leave to announce to the
people of Walla Walla and vicinity, that they have
a. varied and complete assortment of PLAIN and
make their facilities for executing all kinds of plain
and ornamental printing unsurpassed by any oflice
in the Territory. All on]: rs for any of the follow
ing named descriptions of printing will be attended
to promptly, and executed in the neatest style :
ooxs, BLANK Cnscxs,
Psnnruns'rs, N ornson HAND,
BALL Trans-rs, Srnsuno‘r BILLS,
CIRCULARS, Srsuno’r Cums,
Invrnrrons, BILLS or LAnmo,
anmnss Cums, CERTIFICATES,
Concern BILLS, CHECK Booxs,
Pnoammxss, BL’x RECEIPTS,
Annnnss Cums, Drums,
Buns on ALL KINDS, &c., &c., &c.
A Notary Public—Walla Walla. W. T.
Pre-em tiou papers prepared for Land Claimants.
”Ctfiections promptly attended to. 1y
Assistant Surgeon (f the Military Post at
Walla Walla,
LATE of Yrcka, Cal., offers his professional ser
vices to the citizens of the city of Walla Walla
and surrounding country. He will devote especial
attention to the diseases of Females and Children,
Private consultations held at his office, in John
Scranton’s building.
Q'Dr. Harris may be found at the Garrison
from 9 P. M. until 9 A. M., and at his office in the
city during the day. ‘ ‘ 1y
OFFERS his Professional services to the people
of Walla Walla and vicinit . He has perma
nently located here. and feels that he can give en
tire satnfaction to those who may require his servi
ces, as he is familiar With the diseases peculiar to
“318 coast, hilVlllg practiced in Oregon and Califor
nia for thirteen years.
The Doctor is well supplied with Surgical Instru
ments, and will practice the profession in all its
branche<. 1y
FORMERIX Resident Physician at Blackwell’s
Island Prison, N. Y., and at the Baltimore
Alma-house. Md.—has located in Walla Walla, and
res iectfully tenders his services to the community,
.in tam practice of Medicine and Surgery.
Office on Main street. in Court Building. ltf
ESPECTFULLY offers his services to the pub
R lic generally, in the practice of Surgery and
Medicine in and around Walla. Walla.
Office—Dr. Craig's Drug store. Im6
CIVIL ENGINEER, United States Deputy Sur'
veyor for Donation claims, Walla Walls. 1
77 7 Y
L. TERRY, M. D.,
Craig's Drug store, Walla Walla. 1y
(:30. IIIWIL—L‘IAMS, A. c. owns. J. J. Hon-‘31:;
(Late Chief Justice.)
Portland. Oregon—Will practice in all the
courts of Oregon and Washington Territory.
omm on the Levee, over the new Post. oflice.
Portland, Oregon.
fl'Ofiice on Washington street, second door
above First street. 1y
to the Purchase and sale of Horses, 6w.
Goods so (1 upon the most reasonable commis
sions. # lml
$31,088.61 BROOKS,
1‘ QéfiTRAC’PQP-S AND BUILDERS—Shop on the
C orpor, first street south of Main street, Walla
\Wnllo. . . '
,H ylng had long expmence In conymctmg and
,Jguil‘ging, we will guarantee that all kinds of car
,penter and joiner work undertaken bf: us will be
'executed promptlly and in a workman Ike manner.
‘ ‘ Designs for bui ding will be executed upon appli
‘oation. _ __ , A 1y
.HAS ON HAND a large and well selected stock
of TIN WARE, manufactured under his su
pervision by experienced workmen. STOVES of
.varions sizes, styles and patterns, Minin Imple
.ments,&c_., &c., all of which will be 30% at ex
,tremely low prices.
Your patronage ls respectfully solicited. 1y
‘ ANUF‘ACTURER and Wholesale and Retail
M Dealer in Tents. Awnings. Wagon Covers,
Ceilings and SacksJ’orland, ()r‘ég'on.
Tents, Awnings, and Wagon Covers, made to
Flour and Grain Sacks constantly on hand and
lmade to order.
Orders from a distance promptly attended to.—
-'All orders made returnable by the first conveyalnce.
DENTIST—WiII visit Walla Walla on profession
al business within a few weeks. Definite no
‘tice of the time will be given. 1y
in Eancy and Staple Dry Goods. Clothing,
Boots, Shoes, Hats, Caps, Gents’ Furnishing goods,
land Groceries.
Every steamer supplies us with the best of the
‘-above description of goods.
All orders,large or small, will be attended to
‘with promptness and care. 1y
facturers—Front street, Portland, at North
‘end of’the Bridge, nearly opposite Besser’s Saw
:mill. (Shop formerly occupied by Hay & Gradon.)
Wagons of every description made to order.—
‘Orders from the country promptly attended to.
IONEER H;TTERS. Portland, Oregon—Mann
P facture to order, 3nd‘h'ave on hand, every des
ription of Hat to be fonnn :n San Francxaco.
Give usa call, or send your measura, and you
5h,“ h. m.» «Inn with. 1y
:3; , 7.5.:
’:;_r' ~ “Irwin, _ ?” ‘g‘ézhiii‘
‘ , wafi , / < o
q TTORNEYS AT LAW, Walla Walla, W. T.—
Ofiice, near the residence of A. J. Cain. 2y
ENTlST—Tenders his services to the citizens of
D Walla Walla and vicinity, and promises in the
‘various branches of his profession to render entire
‘ satisfaction to those who lniljy desire to patronize him.
‘ Oflice, 4th Door above nion Hotc , Main street,
‘ Walla Walla. 2n"
vallis, Oregon—Office at the North and and
West side of Main street, Walla Walla. ltf
D. s. BAKER,
Walla Walla, Wholesale and Retail dealer in
N “as, &0.. &a., the
~ Also, comment: yen ban“ ‘a large swfily’b‘r‘ '
w. A. anonen. _ a. o. SPARKS.
Walla Walla, Washington Territory.
Will attend all the Courts in Washington and Ore
gon east of the Cascade mountains, an the Supreme
Court of this Territory.
E 3: Particular attention paid to the collection of
de ts, and the securing of pre-emption rights.
Office on Main street, opposite the Printing oflice.
Dec. 6, 1861. 2y
Main street, Walla W'alla.
Pictures taken in cloudy;as well as clear weather
Likenesses of children accurately taken. ltf
T tion Co‘s Steamers will run on the %
Columbia river as follows :
Will leave Portland every
Monday, Wednesday and Friday. at 6 A. M-
Conneeting with the steamer
IMcNULTY. . . . . . . .. . .. . .Commander
1 At the Cascades, ’ W
l FOR DALLES CITY, Arriving same day.
New Suzanna
W111TE......... .......,.............Commander,
Will Leave Des Cllntes for Wallula every Tuesday.
Returning, leaves Wallnla every Thursday at 6 A. u.
Passage from Portland to the Dalles,. . . . . . . . . .88 00‘
I Portage at Cassades extra. ‘
Animals from Portland to Dalles,. , . . . .. ... .. . .5 00
Passage from Des Chutes to \Vallula. . .. . . . . . . .15 00
l WNo Extra charge for meals. '
1». Pres’t O. S. N. Go.
M. L. FRANK a 00.,
Wholesale and Retail
In iact,everytlling to be found in a Gen
eral Variety Store, and many articles
not to be found at any other
establishment in town,
OUR Motto is, “ Small Profits and Quick
Sales.” To dealers, we offer superior illducc~
ments, as
and we have no doubt will suit, both as to
quality and price. We invite the public gen
erally to call and examine our stock before
purchasing elsewhere.
In addition to our assortment now on hand, we have
supplies constantly arriving.
‘3‘ Give us a call and try us.‘“
S‘roan on Main street, Walla Walla Walla, W. 'l‘.
M. L. FRANK & 00.
Nov. 29, 1861, 11116
L. C. KINNEY, M. D.,
ENDERS his professional services to the citizens
T of Walla Wu 1a and vicinity. Ofllce and resi—
dence one mile south of the city, where he can al—
ways he found when not professionally engaged.
Having had more than twenty years raetice in
his rofession, and having served as a Shr eon in
the Ilnited States Army in the Mexican “511', and
having had an extensive Hospital practice, would
say at least that he ought to be qua ifled to practice
his profession : and would refer by permission to the
following named gentlemen :
Gen. Wm. 0. Butler, Col. John S. Williams, Col.
Wm. P. Preston, 001. Geo. N. Hughes, Kentucky.
001. Emery, and Maj. Kenley, Maryland.
Charles G. Phythian, M. D., E. Watson, M. D.,
Joseph Roberts, M. D., Bcnj, Hensley, Jr., M. D.,
Frankfort, Ky.
E. D. Weatherford, M. D., H. M. Weatherford,
M. D.. Dr. Purtle. Dr. Flint, Louisville, Ky.
Dr. Tazo, Vancouver’s Island.
Dr. J. 0. Hawthorne. Portland, Oregon.
Dr. R. 0. Hill, Corvallis, Oregon. ltf
To AND not
XTENDED to all pint; of Oregon ‘
E and California. Offices are estab< %
“shed,“ the places hereinafter mentioned, and the
followmg Dames are given as
Pierce City—Hon’s M. Moore and J. C. Smith;
Oro Fino—Messrs. Thompson & Jesse;
Walla Walla—l). S. Baker & Co;
Dulles—Messrs. Plummet & Riley; >
Portland——Williams, Gibbs & l‘ioflman, £3ng
Salem—Hon’s L. F. Grover an“ L_ Heath;
Albany—Judge S. 1). Hale; and N. H. Cranor;
Corva lis—J. H. Slater an Dr. E. Shell ;
Eugene City—S. Ellsworth and A. J. Welch.
Portland—S. B. PARBISH, Agent.
Salem—C. N. TERRY, Agent.
Nov. 1, 1861. ltf
‘ 1' R t t
tosmopo nan es auran .
S. M. Nolan, - - - Proprietor.
HE Proprietor of the Cosmopolitan takes occa-
T sionto sayto the public generally that he will
spare no pains to make his Restaurant second to none
in this city, in the style of conducting it and in the
quality of edibles with which the table will be sup
1' d.
p llgotwithstanding the other houses have raised in
the prices of board, I shall retain the
The Old Standard Prices,
believing that the business is remunerative at these
prices,if roperly conducted :
Boarg per week, Eight dollars.
Board with Lodging,per week, Ten dollars.
Single Meals, Fifty cents.
Lod ing per night, Fifty cents.
a- Tits house is furnished With GOOD BEDS, anc‘
the sleeping apartments are cleanly and comfortable.
1y 8- M- NOLAN. Pmnrim.
A Song. "
[Seven years ago, we set up the following beautiful
and touching. lines from the original menus" lpt.
They are iron the pen of Francis Panton, of Portind,
who now sleeps in the cemetery “over the river."
Some kind friend has planted a weeping willow over
his grave—a fitting emblem to grace the tomb oLone
whose spirit seemed only attuned to the mouinful
cadences of nature]
Let those whoare wiser mourn hope‘s broken promise,
There are some happy moments in life after all ; ‘ ,
White feathers that ime, as he vanishes from us,
Drops out from his wings 'mid the dark ones that fall,
When Love seems the soul of each bud that uncles“,
And blooms in the green af his myrtle—wove crow!“
And if a stray thist e peeps up ’midst the roses,
Its thorns the next moment are hidden in down. l -
Oh, thus in youth we idly sing,
When some glittering lure hath won us; ,
But soon time glides with smadier wing. } .
And its shadow alone falls on us. 0. ,3. ‘ .
,_. ..-..l ... «IQ 1‘ ',~ ‘L.
These fd'w li'fi'ppy years of exxstence 3001.1 leave us; ‘
And though the bright promise still beckons us on,
Those friends who could share what that promise
might give us,
Have left us its pain or enjoyment, alone.
’Tis a cold, mournfui thought, as one gathers the
That slowly die out on some once happy hearth,
To think that he is all that is left, or remembers
The home of his youth and companions in mirth :
Then the haunts where those he loved once met,
And each relic strewn around him,
Seem emplty echoes— murmuring yet
Some fait less song that bound lim.
Talleyrand and Arnold.
Talleyrand arrived in Havre, hot from Paris. It
was the darkest hour of the French Revolution.
Pursued by the bloodhounds of the Reign of Ter—
ror, stripped of every vestige of property and pow
er, Talleryand secured a passage to America, in a
ship about to sail. He was a beggar and a wan
derer even, in a strange land, he was forced to
earn his daily bread by his daily labor. “Is there
an American staying in your house i‘” he asked of ,
the landlord of the hotel. “I am bound to cross
the water, and would like a letter to a person ofl
influence in the new world.” I
The landlord hesitated a moment and then re-i
plied: “There is a gentleman up stairs either
from America or England, but whether an Amer
ican or an Englishman I cannot tell.” He point
ed the way, and Talleryand, who in his life was a
bishop, prince, and prime minister, ascended the
stairs. A miserable suppliant at the stranger’s
door, he knocked and entered. In the far corner
of the dimly lighted room set a mar. of some fifty
years, his arms folded and his head bowed on his
breast. From a window directly opposite a flood
of light poured upon his forehead. His eyes
looked from beneath his downcast brows and ge
zed upon Talleyrand’s face with a peculiar search
ing expression. His face striking in outline; his
mouth and chin indicative at an iron wlll. a flki
form vigorous, even with the snows of fifty win
ters—was clad in dark, but rich and distinguished
Talleyrand advanced, stated that he was a fu
gitive, and under the impression that the gentle~
man before him was an American, solicited his
feeling oflices. He poured out his history in elo
quent French and broken English. “I an: a wan
deter, an exile. lam forced to fly to the New
World, without a friend or a home. You are an
American; give me, then, I beseech you, a letter
of yours; that I may be able to earn my bread.
lam willing to toil in any manner. The scenes
of Paris have filled me with such horror that a
life of labor would be a paradise to a career of
luxury in France. You will give me a letter‘to
a friend? A gentleman like you, has, doubtless,
very many friends.”
The stranger rose, and with a look 'l‘alleyrand
never forgot, retreated toward the door of the
next chamber, his eyes looking still from beneath
lhis darkened brow. He spoke as he retreated
backward, his voice was full of meaning. “I am
the only man born in the New World who can
raise his hand to God and say, I have not a friend,
no,not one, in all America !”
Talleryand never forgot the overwhelming sad
nes of the glances which accompanied these words,
“Who are you P” he cried, as the strange man re
treated towards the next room. , i
‘ “My name,” he replied, with a smile that had
more mockery-joy in its convulsive expression, “my
name is Benedict Arnold.”
He was gone. Talleyrand sank back into a
chair, gasping the words, “Arnold the traitor.”
THE wind is a musician at birth. We extend a
silken thread in the crevice of a window, and the
wind finds it and sighs over it, and goes up and
down the scale upon it, and poor Pagiuini must
go somewhere else for his honor, for 10 ! the wind
is performing with a single string. It tries almost
every thing upon earth to see it there is music in
it; it persuades a tone out of the great ball in the
tower, when the 391103 if. at home and asleep ; it
makes a mournful harp of the giant pines, and it
idoes not disdain to try what sort of a whistle can
be made of the humblest chimney in the world.
How it will play upon a great tree, till every' leaf
thrills with it, and winds up the river at its base,
for a short murmuring accompaniment. And
what a melody it sings, when it gives a concert
with afull choir of the waves of the sea, and per'
forms an anthem between the two worlds, that
goes up, perhaps, to the stars that love music the
most and sang it the first. Then how fondly it
haunts old houses ; moaning under the caves,
sighing in the halls, opening old doors, without
fingers, and singinga measure of some sad, old
song, around the fireless and deserted. hearth.—
B. E. Taylor,
He is worthy of esteem that knows what isjust
and honest, and dares to do it ; that is master 01
his own passions, and scorns to he a slave to an-.
other’s. Such an one merits more respect than
those gay things who owe all their greatness and
reputation to their rentals and revenues.
Happiness can be made quite as well of cheap
materials as dear ones.
Wise Hints. ‘
Nature never did betray the soul that loved
her, and nature tells man and woman to marry.
Just as the young man is entering upon life—as
he comes to independence and man's estate—just
at the crisis of his being, is to be seen whether he
decides with the good and great and the true, or
whether he sinks to be lost forevepfiimatrimony
gives him ballast and a Warping. War with
nature and she takes a sure revenge. Tell a
young man not to have an attachment that is vir
tuous, and‘he will have one that is vicious. Vir
tuous love, the honest love of man for the women
be in about to marry, gives him an anchor for his
been ; ”something pure and beautiful for which to
new: Sire! ...Amiuthe aroma», ; what ,I m
light it sheds upon her path ; it makes life for her
no day dream, no idle hour, no painful shadow,
no passing show, but something real, earnest,
worthy of heart and head. But most of us are
cowards, and dare not think so; we lack grace;
are of little faith; our inward eye is dim and
dark. The modern young lady must marry in
style; the modern young gentleman marries a for
tune. But in the meantime the girl grows an old
maid, and the youth takes chambera—ogles the
nursery maids, and becomes a man about town, a
man whom it is dangerous to invite into your
house for his business is intrigue. The world
might have had a happy couple; instead, it gets
a woman fretful, a plague to all around her. He
becomes a skeptic in all virtue; a corrupter of the
youth of both sexes; and a curse in whatever do.
mestic circle he may penetrate. Even worse may
iresult. She may be deceived, and die of a broken
’heart. He may rush from one rolly to another,
iassociate only with the vicious and depraved;
'bring disgrace and sorrow upon himself and all
around him, and sink into an early grave.
. Our cities show what become of men and wo-
Imen who do not marry. \Vorldly fathers and
‘mothers advise not to marry till they can afford
‘to support a wife; and the boys wickedly expend
double the amount in bad company. Hence it is
all wise men, like Franklin, advocate early mar
riages; and that all our great men, with rare ex
ceptions, have been men who married young.
Wordsworth had only one hundred pounds a year
when he first married. Lord Eldon was so poor
that he had to go to Claremarke, London, to buy
sprats for supper. Coleridge and Southey we
can’t find had any income at all when they mar
ried. We question whether, at any time, Luther
hgd mun than 5&5: roamed-'- . Tom -We 'xinut
humanity in its very dawn. Fathers, you say you
teach your sons prudence—you do nothing of the
kind; your world-wise and clever son is already
ruined for life. You will find him at faro tables
and free love circles. Your wretched worldly
wisdom taught him to avoid the snare of marry
ing young—and soon, if he is not involved in em
barrassments which will last him a life, he is a
base fellow—heartless, false, without a single gen
erous sentiment or manly aim—he has “ no God,
no Heaven, in the wide world.”
Justice—Not Law.
John Dudley, of Raymond, a trader and farm
er, was judge of the superior court of New Hamp—
shire from 1785 to 1797. He was a man of keen
sagacity and strong common sense. His mind
was discriminating, his memory retentive, and he
was a most extramdinary person. He had butl
little learning, and no legal acquirements. He
was intent on doing substantial justice in every
case. Theophilus Parson said : “ You may laugh
at his law and ridicule his language, but Dudley
is, after all, the best judge I ever knew in New
The following specimens of the nclusion of
one of the charges of Judge Dudley waill illustrate
his ideas of the law. He addresses the jury in
somewhat after this style :
“ You have heard, gentlemen of the jury, what
has been said in this case by the lawyers, the ras
cals ! But no, I will not abuse them. It is their
business to make a good confor their clients;
they are paid for it, and they ave done in this
case well enough. But you and I, gentlemen,
have something else to consider. They talk of
law. Why, gentlemen, it is not law we want, but
justice. They would govern us by the common
law of England. Trust me, gentlemen, common
sense is a more safe guide for us; the common
sense of Raymond, Epping, Exeter, and the oth—
er towns Which have sent us here to try this case
between two of our neighbors. A clear head and
ian honest heart are worth more than all the law
lof all the lawyers. There was one good thing
said at the bar. It was from Shakspeare, an
English player, I believe. No matter; it is good
enough almost to be in the Bible. It is this—
‘Be just, and fear not.’
It is our business to do justice between the par-,
ties, not by any quirks of the law out of Coke or
Blackstone, and other books that I never read
and never will, but by common sense and com
mon honesty as between man and man. This is
our business, and the curse of God fl upon us if
we neglect, or evade, or turn aside from it. Now,
Mr. Sheriff, take out the jury, and you, Mr. Fore
man, do not keep us waiting with idle talk, of
which there has been too much already, about
matters which have nothing to do with the merits
of the case. Give us an honest verdict, of which
as plain common-sense men, you need not be
‘ ashamed.”
A ray of light to the understanding is better
than a volume committed to memory.
There are three things that never become rusty
vthe money of the benevolent; the shoes of the
butcher‘s horse, and slanderer’s tongue,
. Short Credits.
A little while ago—only a few months at most
—it was easy for any well-dressed man, with a
smooth face, candid speech, and respectable hat,
l to enter the wholesale stores of our eastern cities,
and obtain, on fair representations, almost any
amount of goods, and credit to almost sny extent.
It was not the habit of dealers to scrutinize too
closely, or hesitate long, when a new customer
appeared. They took risks, as the insuranhe of
fices do, upon the principle that a few dead losses
are to be. made up by the general gains. Thus,
calculating the chances that, out of five customers,‘
for instance, one would probably prOVe bad, prices‘
were so arranged that the other four would make
the dealers 3304,; Eran themamwha same "lib.
cash in hantl to purchase, it he was not shrewd,
paid unjust profits, which went to sustain this
risky credit system. And so matters continued,
until certain descriptions of trade became mere
gambling operations, and the manner in which
goods were bought and sold, without money and
without price, was astonishing to shavers !
The result was inevitable. The bad customer
sold his goods again at prices with which the
others could not compete. The end, as we have
seen, was general convulsions. The revival of
business will be upon a new footing. The attenu—
ated cord of credit stretched until it broke; and
it cannot easily be tied. We must commence
ianew. Men must get down—if they have not
alraedy been shaken down—from the stilts and
stagings of the false systems, and stand upon the
solid ground of capital and capacity.
Confidence, in trade, is as necessary as atmos
pheric air in physics. Without it, business stifles.
But long credits are not only unnecessary, but ul
timately ruinous. All the minor branches of busi—
ness, especially, require to be safe and successful,’
cash payments, or reasonably short credits. It
may be objected to this, that an obstacle is placed
in the way of the young man of enterprise, desir
ous ofentering upon a branch of trade which de
mands an outlay exceeding his immediate means.
Very well; it is an obstacle. \Ve believe in ob-‘
stacles. And if the young man lacks perseverance ‘
and energy to overcome so natural a one, he has
“no business ”to go into business. The majority
of our'ablest merchants are men who have come
up from humble beginning. What honor they
have, they have duly served up to. It is, in real-i
ity, no desirable fortune for a young man to be set
afloat in a large business, which struggle and
discipline Law. nu swam Mm In tnnnuor: 'l‘th
facility with which this has been done of late
year-e, has proved the ruin of thousands, who,
placed in circumstances where success would only
have attended the just development of their facul
ties; through practice and experience might have
become strong and prosperous business men.
A Candid Minister.
A writer in the Boston Post tells the following
“ good one ” concerning one Deacon M., whose
most grievous fault, if not his only one, was the
habit of occasionally getting “ mellow.” Almost
every Sunday at noon he would indulge in his
favorite cider brandy to such an extent that it was
with some little difficulty he reached his pew,
which was in the broad aisle, near the pulpit, and
between the ministers and the village squire’s-
One Sunday morning the person told his flock
that he should preach a sermon to them in the
afternoon touching many glaring sins that he
grieved to see so conspicuous among them, and
that he hoped they would listen attentively, and
not flinch if he should happen to be severe. The
afternoon came, and the house was full, everybody
turned out to hear their neighbors dressed down
by the minister, who, after well opening his ser
mon, commenced upon the transgressors in a loud
voice, with the question: “ Where is the drunk
ard P” A solemn pause succeeded this inquiry;
when up rose Deacon M., with his face radiant
with copious draughts of his favorite drink at his
noontide meal, and steadying himself as well as
he could by the pew-rail, looked up to the par
son and replied, in a piping tremulous voice:
“ Here I am.” Of course, a consternation
among the congregation was the result of *
honest Deacon’s rerponse ; however, the paredi'i
went on with his remarks as he had written them,
commenting severely upon the drankard, and
warning him to forsake at once such evil habits
if he would seek salvation and flee the coming
wrath. The Deacon made a bow and then seat~
ed himself. " And now,” outspoke the preacher
in his loudest tones, “ where is the hypocrite P”
A pause—but no one responded. Eyes were
turned upon this and that man—but the most
glances seemed directed to the Squire’s pew, and
indeed the person seemed to squint hard in that
direction. The deacon saw where the shaft was
leveled, or where it should be aimed, and rising
once more, leaned over his pew-rail to the squire,
whom he tapped on the shoulder and thus ad
dressed : “ Come Squire, why don‘t you get upi
I did when he called on me."
[l4l)an AND ITS BLESTING.—PeopIe may tell‘
you of your being unfit for some particular occupa
tions in life, but heed them not. Whatever em-i
ployment you follow wtth perseverance and assid
uity will he found it for you; it will be your sup
port in youth and comfort in age. In learning the
useful part of any professsion, very moderate abil
ities will suffice ; great abilities are generally in
jurious to the poesessors. Life has been compared
to a race‘ but the allusion still improves by obser
ving that the most swift are ever the most apt to
stray from the course.
There in beauty enough on earth to make a
home for angels.
Important To Candidates.
The following queries,ptopounded by a. Mir
souri paper to the numerous candidates for office
3in that State, are so general and national that
jthey will apply to any section of our glorious~
Union :
“Ques'rross THAT MUST BE Answenen.—lat..
If three men work ten days on a fertile farm, what
is the Logarithm F
2d. Of what use is a compass without 0.-
needle. and which way does it point?
3d. What is the required length of 9. limited
steel wire which runs the other way?
4th. If three watches don't keep time with either
of them, which will gain P
sth. Given—The complexion, age and height of‘
3 middle sized man. Required—The nature of
‘hi‘s'hhsineesfhis e‘nnual gainfls, and'prospects inJi-‘e?
6th. In a large household neither father nor
mother know anything. How was it with the
family—were they Know Nothings or not?
7th. Is a man ever justifiable in either case, and’
if so, which ?
Bth. If a man stands upon the sea-shore, with
his eye elevated 4 feet 2 I—2 inches, which way
will he look, and what will he see ? “’hat is his
name? How long will he stand there? Which
way did he come from P Where will he go when
he gets through looking? How ‘long will he be
on the road, and what will he do when he gets
there ? .
9th.!Required—A series of factors expressing
the relation of father and son.
10th. Required—ln terms of X—the relative
situation of any two country villages, with a papu
lation of the former.
11th. If a hard kont be tied in a cat’s tail
which way, how long, and with what success will
she run after it ? Also, who tied the knot?
Note Ist. The cat was dark colored, and howl
ed o’nights.
Note 2d. The conditions of this problem are
extremely vague.
12th. Required—The erratic course of l' flea,
affected with strabismus.
SARAH CALICOZIES.—I am a calico woman and I
admire calico women. 1 mean that the humble
fabric is my choice, and that the wearer—when it
is clean and nice—receives from me what I like to
receive. approbation. Wives, mothers, sisters and
young girls, calico is the most virtuous of dress
goods; you can’t envelop your dear persons in a
better or more attractive raiment, and if I could
only live to know that every one of my fellow-cit
izenesses had adopted that pretty and economical
cotton, I should deem the number of my days coma
plete, and could rejoice in my going 0‘ "r“ “‘
wssennrg‘ or extravagances rn‘ my native land
would benefit the generations yet unannounced.—
Did you ever reflect, my great number of beauti
ful, loving and lovable sisters, that your silken
skirts, fine laces and other rich stuff, are the choke
nots which strangle the energy, prospect and hap
piness of our toiling brothers? No, you don’t
think anything about it; your delight is to array
yourselves in flash finery and to rustle, and sweep,
and swing “sensation” along the street. Some of
you carry goods and jewelry sufficient, in your
daily walks, to supply a whole neighborhood with
all the fanciful decorations needed to please those
who have intellectual refined taste. There is
many a one individual whose personal fixtures for
a year cost enough to dress her decently, comfort
ably and elegantly for five years, leaving a surplus
which would defray the expenses of building and
furnishing a home! And from whom do you get
these enormous accumulations of dry goods E’—
You don't earn the money which is paid for them;
,you don’t work any, don't save anything. “Oh,"
you exclaim, “the men do it; it is their fault; they
spoil us if we are spoiled.” It is no such thing,
land if it were, you ought to be above the follies
} with which you are tempted, and that you are
often the cause of bankruptcy, discouragement and
“hard times.” The men love you—of course they
do, but there is not so much esteem in their ad
miration when they look at you as they would at
a great picturfied show bill. They prefer sense,
accomplishment of mind, modest deportment,
honesty, affection, cheerfuiness, frugality—calico
ONE of our cotemporaries disposes of the Vl‘l‘
tues of early rising as follows:
i “We have watched those fellows who are the
yearly risers, and as a general thing they are the
first chaps to go to groceries of a morning. It is
all moonshine about the smartest and greatest
men being the earliest risers. It might have
hem so in old times, but now-a-days, when you
see a chap moving about very early, you may be
certain that he is after a drink.”
There, that’s a fair sample of the any public
opinion treats a fellow who “ rises with the lurk,"
(a. poetical phrase which signifies getting up be
fore eight o'clock.) The last time we remember,
says the Mariposa Gazette, of carrying out a vir
tuous resolution of that sort, a fellow pointed his
mouth at. us from a corner grooery, and shot it off
‘ thus : “ Hello, old fell—been .5; runnin’ all night,
eh P” Since that memorable'lmorning, we have
lullowed the lark to rise first.
THE following correspondence recently occurred
between a tailor and debtor:
Sir—Your bill has been a long time standing.
I beg it. may be settled forthwith. '
To which the tailor received the following po
lite reply : ' ' '
SIR—I am very sorry my bill should have been
kept standing so yery long. Pray, redfiest it to
sit down. ___—
“ BOYS, " saidjunole Amos, as he surveyed the
animal, “ there is only one reason why this mare
should not trot a mile in three minutes.” The
boys crowded around to hear the reason, and one
asked him what. it was.
1 “ Why, said he, “ the distance is too great for
lso short a time.”
NO. 3.

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