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Burlington free press. (Burlington, Vt.) 1827-1865, July 07, 1843, Image 1

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No. 5
vol. xvir.
nr mrs. l. tt. stnouii?.Er.
During tlits battle of Banker's Hill, vcncra
t clergyman knelt on the field, with hands up.
raised, and gray head un'cdvered, and while the
'bullet! whistled aVotind him, prayed for the sue
cess of hit compatriot, and the deliverance of
ill country.
It was an hour of fear and dread
High rose the buttle cry,
And round in heavy volumes sprtsd
Tha war-cloud to the sky.
Twas not, as when in rival strength
. ContemtinB nations mret,
Or love of conquest madly hurls
A monarch from his seat.
Tet one was there, unused to tread
, Thepathof mortal strife,
Wholmt the Savior's flick had fed
tleiidc the fount of life.
He knelt him where the Mack smoko wreathed,
. Hi head was bowM and lure,
WhiU for an infant land, he breathed
The agony of pmjer.
The column red with early morn,
, May tower o'er Bunker a height,
And proudly tell a race unborn,
Their patriot father'e might)
but thou, nh patriarch, old and gray,
. The rrnphet of the free,
Who knelt among the dead that day,
What shall fame raise to thee 1
It ia ,iot meet that brass or stone,
Which feel the touch of lime.
Should keep the record nf a faith
That wol.e thy deed sublime;
Ve trace it on a tablet fair,
Which glows when ants vx pale,
A promise: tint thcgiiiid m.'i pia)cr
Shall within God prevail.
sr nrt. danici. bisglt.
Ediratinn is a crand tliinfj in the wnrld,. It
'does help along amazingly. And the more I see
of ignorance the more I ilcsm'sc it. I am going
a give an account ol the truuhV and tribulu' ion
of Daaron Carpenter, jufl to chow what nu tiir
Iv thing ignorance if. Nobody would believe
how much it cost linn, both in money and ron
arn ol mind, to master a pintle hard won! he
found in the newspaper. Uut I must tell 'lit'
iitory front beginning to end, and then it vll he
'seeii whether I am a fool nr not.
The first beginning nf trouble with Dear .i
tarpenter was owing to the loosi-nem of hi
hair. What that wa owing tn it - not forme
to sav. Ilia Mster Sukey lold him it was old
age. Hut t-he is a little gnnd-for-nuthing loan.-,
that are Suke. Being a single mm. this Dea.
con is kinder tender and touchy about his age,
and this is enough to Keep her harping upon ii
forever and ever. Let her alone for finding nut
"the Doac n's mre toe, if lie ha-- our, and tramp,
in upon it iilien as i-bo had a chance. Ilul
nobody else rails the Deacon old It is a com.
mini thing tn .hear folk say, "how young the
Deacon looks !" and widow Green is ready to
wear he in tint over five years older than she is,
and she i quite a youiig woman considering.
My opinou i, tint the Deacon chaws to'i
much tobar.ker. But no matter what the reason
wa, the Deacon's hair pot Inm-encd at the roots,
'and begun to slip off"; not fast but steady, and
at a rate to clear his scalp in lime, ami ir-.avc
him as bald as the Prophet Elislin. The Den.
con was a good pious man, and as a deacon
aught to be. No man hated pride and vanity
Vnore than he did. But he thought his hair was
pretty. The story goes that he liked to look at
it in the looking-glass ; and precious time was
spent in combing i.ud greasing, with patent
bear's grease, too. Rut he was sung, and no.
body etlspcctcd ho had any regards for his outer
man at all. You would as soon expect to sec
him dancing a jig as making a fuss about his
locks and curls.
If you go for quantity, you wnnld say the
Deacon's head of hair is a ir.n.-t amazing one.
It was a full crop, I warrant ye. It lay all over
his head in thick flakes, nf a sandy brown color,
and his two fir? looked from behind like a pair
of cart wheels under a load of hay. Finally, it
was a net.t fur ti.e. Evil One. As there was no
other nook or cover about the Dearon for ihe
Old Boy to lurk in, he had to sneak in there, and
make the best of it.
But if the Old Harry wanted help to turn the
Dearon from the straight path, the women were
always at hand. There was argreat pulling of
caps Tor the Deacon at bquash burner, whether
for true lovcnr houses and land, or greater r,om.
forts, is not for me to say. .Besides, litihlah
Hornbeam, she that give Mr. Beadle such a kick
in his stomach, there was the widow (jreelt and
Iwn or three more. But thu widow look the rag
off of the bush. By making much of sister Su
key, she found out the right handle to take hold
of the deacon by, and she made right for his
hair, laid violent hands upon i', and with the
help of Suke, car icd offa handful, enough tn
mike a bird's nest. The Deacon was terrible
Vnad, wasn't he 1 and folks said, 'l low foml that
are widow Green is of sandy brown hair!"
Hern is yaller.
But cutting off with scissors or even shears is
nothing; it is this regular coming out by roots,
constant bidding good by tn old friend one after
another, that goes to the heart. It was harder
upon the dearon. berause he kept his trouble all
to himself. Ho didn't even tell his mother, for
fear Suite wrutld gel hold of the story. But that
loving MsVer did not leave him long under the
weifcfi't of that secret. She noticed that he
jicfttched his head of late with only one finger
ind despert rareful with that. This was enough,
and one day she says to the Deacon, says she,
"Eli how old m'un an old bachclorbc when
begins tn moult .'
'That are Suke Carpenter U in everlasting
torment, and that is the truth. No respect for
ih Deacon, though .lie is twice her agp.
Throwing'oW bachelors in h's teeh, at all times
and seasons, and ritrht afore lb" widow Green
1no. But SuVc bad nn malice, I must sav that
for herj all she wanted wa tnspiir up thnDoa.
eon tn get married. She hid set her heart up
on that and lie was so shv of the women !
Well, about thw lime, when the D"aron was
worrying and fretting, and h' hair falling like
ihi leaves in the latter end of 0-toh"r, lie tot
ej.iwn on Rnurdav evpnlnrr tn rei.l hta ,teiten,
pr that had jut come in. Now the d"ar.vi In, 1
nisnwn wav n reading n nevmper. As be 1 along as usuaii eyeing that chamber winder
wsa not up to the now f Hurled. itnnrnveineti'K .utli all h's might. No'hingto bo seen there
that have been mad up in the parts of sneerb, 'hut i whito ourUin with a bluo fringe around
h wa constantly running again wnrch tin' ifllt.
hi could spell hn could not understand. H's'
way men w m Cive mem ine rro.liv. When i
t . L .. - .1 1 I ... . .1
no me n orn mini lie nnln I sIOl to Iwvrrj'p
with i'.bnt just railed it "sundries," and passed
nn. Po if he didnl plough deep hn went over
Ihe ground and did his stent as quirk a the
smartest hand could dn; hut this lime ho found
hismatrh. Ho ran foul of a root, Afier er.
ling through the pnlitirs and murders, and fires,
etc. the nevt th'ng he came to was this;
"Infallible rccipt to prevent the hair from fal.
Jin? off:"
H opener h's pves wider.
"Take 2 3 Darts of Ihe best French bramlu
ind 1-3 part of s,u,l, ph (sundries) of
copper; put them into a quart bottle and shako
it till folu'iou takes place. Then rub the head
therewith night and morning."
'I'hern is comfort now for a man troubled with
a looseness of his hair. Tim Deacon jumped
right up on cend, and, sayB he.
"I'll put that mess a brewing jjst as quick as
I can."
The first thing to he got at was a bottle, nnd
that was a scarce article in the house. The
Deacon steered right up to the kitchen garre';
this had been the save all of the f unity for 40
years', and was chock lull of all old- ami ends.
Besides roots and arb, and garden seed') hang,
ingfrotn the rafters, thu floor was piled up: with
old broken and wn-u out house stuff, farming
tools, &c A picro nf almost any thing you can
think of was there hut nothing whole. But tli'c
Deacon after a good deal of searching, found a
good sound bottle nicely e;'orkcd up with a cob.
Ho opened it, and found it full of blue vitriol.
It was the overplus his mother had, after dying
her worsted yarn last year, and as she had nn
more use for that nor the hott'e f.he put one ht'o
the other and they stowed the snugger. Let
old Aunt Becky 'Carpenter alone for contriving.
Nothing but blue Vitril,' say's the Deacon, and
straight goes he and shakes it all out into the
duck pond. Then ho reused the bottle, ar.d
scalded it out clean, and then sat down to t-tudy
the 'infallible receipt' mice more. Then waB
that same stumbling. block in the way, and the
Deacon found now that Sundries' would not
suit. He must come up to the scratch, nnd tack
le with it in good amies'. Well, it was easy
enough to spell and pronounce it Sulphate of
cnpprr; aid it was clear tlat stood for the
name of a thing, hut winch of the things in all
this world was ill There the Deacon was hard
and fat.. There was no rbw nor sign to find
out by. Kyther shape nor color, nor if it grew
on the airtlr, or tinder the air: h".
The Deacon re-irrlied the dictionary, and it
wa'nt there cane why ! It is pnlhceary Lat
in, and has no bus'iiers there. Then he put
the q'lOftinn sort of sidevvars to Alarm. No
ue; aunt R!i'ky know all but everything, hut
sulpht.le was beyond her gumption. He had no
beticr luck a trying to fit-h it out of li s neigh,
hors, underhanded!'. It 'a'cs felling in the
iiiud there.
The Deacon was fairly nonplussed. Night
a'ler night he lay tossing, and tumbling ami
thinking, and rous.dcring. There was a way
to rotiiu at it, il be coulii mike up Ins hum. I to
try it. Air. Iliviis", the stage ilri.c, passed the
i ii. r once a ueek, on his way lo 1'ortMiul, ami
i ua-! ready to do any sort of arrant w ith the gro it.
i est pleasure, pmudmg he was well paid lor his
vnuhle. It was only tn tell, liiviin what was
wanting, ami it it vm no' n micuming; it u,ib
heraize the thing was not tube had. fiut send,
ing tn Portland lor that are sulphate was a jump
in the hard that tcairt the Deacon. Who could
tell the price it would tost ! Tins held him
hick lor mine tune ; but teased anil tormented
as lie was, he lot all pat chit by ilerecs. and
at l.u-l he (jot to be as r.it.li as he had been tire.
'I will set Bivins to work,' says he, 'if it coits
Inn dollars.'
Amliew I" vins has been our stage. driver a
number ol years. He is a I lariiin.pcaruin. rattle,
headed lellow, but knows winch sulci his bread
is buttered. Money don'i slip tlirmiL'h his fn.i
gers without a pinch. Driving wasn't all the
concern hu had in the line. By hook or by
crook he had got to be owner of a guud slice o;
the .stuck. The. Deacon knew him well; he
had paid him many a mncpencR Inr arratils done
in Portland, and says he, 'I shall let him into
Ihe secret jest as fur as I choose.'
Well, the Deacon got all ready, and the next
Tuesday morning, as t-oon as he spied the plage
a coming a far upon Saddleback lull, he slips
round lolher side of the barn, to lay in wait lor
Diviris. and have his talk with him there out of
the way of peaking and eyes dropping from the
hniii-e. Well, Bivins rotim driving along, slow
and easy, looking t-harp ahead, till he got a
ghmp.-o through the trees', nf calico at a sarliu
chamber window, and he pulled right up.
Now's the time,' says he, 'lo give that gal a
sample of driving a team.'
Then he fell tocracking his whip anil jerking
the reins, till he provoked the burses, inio the
right humor, and then lie let 'em went ! and llie
way they stomped it past the hnusr; w.llj then
heads and tail in the air, was enough to scare
tolks, the old stage rumbling out the stone,
shook the en rlh lo the foundations. The tun
passengers inside going dingle dangle, and Air.
Bivins atop, selling up straight, with Ins elbows
squared, his hat cocked a one side, and his nose
tn the wind like a weather cock. And now he
lugs out his long tin trumpet, and it was toot,
toot, loot, all the way by the btm ami clear out
of sight.
'That are Bivins is crazv, I do believe.' says
the Deacon as he came out ot his hiding place,
'or eisn were suiiieiliiug about It. in lo bears
He HCiil on; peaking round the corner nf the
linur'e, and lo and heboid ! there sot inariin Su.
key at her chamber window; a looking so pleas.
ed and and sii charming !
u, hoh.'
'flooil mortiiii' Mister Carpenter.'
The Detenu gie a grom, and wantctj to know
what she was doing there. And she answered
and said 'it is iioue of his business.'
It is again thu law to put up scarecrows so
near the road to scare horses.
'But I thought, Eli, nothing but widows could
scare an old bachelor.'
The Deacon left the ground, followed by a
laugh from Suke that mako all nut. doors ring
again. But it was no laughing matter tn the
Deacon, Every thing went wrong that day;
and caise why ! ho had dreaiiint ol snakes all
tiighl, got tip the wrong way in the thorning, and
dressed himself without my care. People dif
fer about signs, hut the Deacon lias settled one
thing. When he happens In put on his stock,
ing wrong side outwards again, he moans to
lake il right nff end clung'i it, and let other
folks do as I hey like.
A whole week now for the Dearon to chaw
the hitler cud in, his hair falling nil the time and
sea tnruig eery where about the liotis-, on
flor, chair-', table, and een into his dish.
Turn which way ho would, there lay sandy
brown hurs, a Muring hnu in ti.e laro like
snakos, Hu was down sick at tho sight of
The nevt Tuesday morning the Deacon went
and planted hiuell right in the middle of the
1 nened !u have nn passengers and' was loitering
ro.'.iti wiiii a cuiigel in Ins hand. Itivius hap
'Whow! Is that you Deacon 1
I swan, I
nxu to run over ye.
. i . .
As the Dearon was the Vicn President of the
Temperance Society. Bivins was nearly "oing
into fits when told lo get a quart nf tho best
brandy money would buy.
'n ! Deacon, you don't say brandy!'
Yes, I dn say brandy,'
M.t me alone. I shall snort out. Thetrrcat
temporizer ! teetotal obstinacy, WeP, (f this
u.iii t oeai an.
'Air BiiitiP, don't you bo scairt about mo
'But I am scairl for tho cred.t of tho line.
Isn't this a cold water Btagol Horses, driver,
passeneers. touch notbiiiT but c.nhi u Hter
Hainl I sworn ! and look at the bills. 'To fetch
ur carry nothing but cold icater,' in great black
'Evcept p'nsic in leet'e teeny letters.'
'O, physic.' Air. Bivins looked queer. 'Grca'
comfort, aint' it. Sly tra;i behind the floor, and
nobody the wiser. Well, Deacon, being it you,
I will run the risk any how. Hut look a here.
drawing down tho corner of Ins mouth with an
(awtul squint,; "paient opeuiiuoc
'No need ol telling stories, Andrew, t aint a
going to drink one single drop of it,'
I want it to put on my nair,
Oh, th it's it exactly. ' To put on to ynur hair.
Rubin. ig down with brandy kills the varmint.
I'he Deacon then handed him a bit of paper
wild sulphate if copper on it, as plain as it could
be writ', and went on to charge him for life anil
death to get that, without fall; fur have it he
must co.t what it would.
S. ii, I. oh .stuff sulph sulphat. What
sort of trucK is Ihat I'
Oh, it's a new invented medicine to keep the
hair Iroi'n coining off.'
Aint-widow Urccrr, ha, old boyV
'Shaw '
'Well, well, deacon, no matter. Where is
it to be had V
' That's jest what you niust find nut, Bivins, il
you have to ransack the whole city. Il's a
scarce article, I spose, but you musu't come
back without it.'
'We'l, Deacon, this la no nmepenny job, you
know-, anil there's two on'em. I suppose you
lay uut to do the handsome thing ; but I should
like to hnoiv liiiw touch', 'cost what it will,'
amount's in, over and above the price Ihe articles
will come to. It will take the wcignt oil my
mind, you know.'
The 'Deacon luulcd out a bright tilver dollar,
and held tt up.
Give us your hand, Doacnn. Enough said,
Vo.i shall have that .ipj bluff, if its above
ground.' ,
The DiMcon then went on to give an arcnunt
of all Ins troub'e' and plagues hu! Bivins took
n i notice His eyes were rolling all over the
linn-.' ami yard, and hiiileb'v they I'ut so'. His
f.r-c I'epiln to ni.'.' and curl into all manner"!
m in lo and lie pulld up lis collar, and says
'Goo I morning, Mis'i Silkcy.
7'ue Deacon turned his head with a start; as
if a hornet had stung him behind the car, and
there he saw his dear siier, a inarching, like a
queen, piil in Ii ind, to the well.
'Slauil by the leaner a miiiit, Oeacnn; says
Bivin; and it was one jump tothe trroiitidmer
tne bars ami violent hands laid upon the piil.
Then Ui!s o!' on! ilnnjnts a.i I -p. in at the well
The tirsl pitiful spi.t in the Iray. Then In
drawn another, and must rarry it lor her to the
kitchen jlaor, bcraize, 'one goo'd thing leads to
another.' Bunchy lie gives her a poke in the
ribs and she lends bun n w'ipe in the ch ips.
I hen In'h lau,;li lit to kill tlieiiuelvc-", ami oil
runs Bivin.
WeP, gi od bye Deacon. Aliisn'l keep the
mail, ye kmiw',' he begun to start his cattle.
'.Now; Amiieiv, my lad, will you remember?
'."). most undoubtedly. Snkev and rnnnra
no sulpher u,,.(rjoipil'ilrt' run on) but I'tegul
thu black and white. No mistake.'
'And Air. Bivint.'
'Keep da rk.'
B.vins drawe.l his mouth into n half rh'nnn,
blanted his lingers aside his nose', shut one eye
and winked the other and drove off.
Next Saturday afternoon the Djacon was at
his post betimes. As the stage didn't come in
sight at tho miuit, he concluded it was turned
over and over, and smashed into about forty pie
ces. It come at last, though loaded with pas
senger, and among the rest there was a face
the Deacon had a leetle rather seen somewhere
else, jest then. It was a short, skim. milk, face
full ol wrinkle, with leetle hucklebury eyes,
and belonged to old Peter Weasel my near
Uncle Peter is a brother temperanrc, and of
the real grit. Teetotal to thu bick-bine.
L'Miks mortal snur at a rider mill, and the sight
ot a chunk bottle makes him crawl all over. He
owed the Deacon no good will for thwarting
him in try ing to vo e du.vu i i Jer and spruce beer.
inn they u iu t agree to a Hair upon some pints
ol doctrine.
Well; B vini arter funiblinz in his box awhile
first reached ot.t a lot, wrapped up snug in brown
paper, and I ben a bottle, looking dreadful sly al
tin; ti n-1, an 1 as he nauds it over to the Deacon,
Ii.. twitches all on one side of li s lace into a
wink and rays he 'patcilt opcdildoc'
Willi this, Uncle Peter pokes out his head,
and says be,
'Why, Deacon Carpenter', whit upon airlh
are vo i ngmng to d i with that !'
llors.'.pbysic;, says ihe Dearon.
('rack went Bivm's whip, ju"t in time'.
The Dsacon dro v a long breath, ami went
into the house, where the women folks weie
laying in wait I'or h.ni.
Says au it B-'cky. says she, 'I ifj wonder what
Eli has gut now Irom Portland.'
'II irse.plwse ,' siys the Djacon.
B.it the women tn.isl always see and feel nf
every thing for iheuiselves. The bottle though
pissed free, becauee they couldn't get the ruTk
o.it, but the brown piper was soon laid open on
Ihe table.
'What is this ere?' says aunt Beckv.
'G less three limes,' says tho Deacun looking
dreadfully cunning.
Aunt Becky put on her specs, and looked and
smelt and touched her tongue tu it, and says she,
'It's blue vilrilX'
' on ha.-d lor yel Alarim, this time. T.'iis is
what tc; call thu sulphate nf c -ppor,'
'It is nn such a thing, Eli. Il's blue vitril,
and nutbitig else.'
The Deaciin now began to feel rather streak,
cd. Alarm never said sai tain what she didn't
&nusirtain and tha rotten stuff looked so exact,
ly hku the same he haM thrown into llie. duck
pond. Mb, E'i Carpenter: vou triust net un airlir in
ilu iivirwng lo ca'cli ui j a n ippiii;. Sukey, go
up in tho kitchen garret and letch Hie that hu'.
tie. It stands undiir the shelf of broken crock,
ury, right between the old churn and Hit broken
le i kettle. You must crawl under the old nh.
plulab'e, and mind you don't thrttw down the
hot I on i 03 j chair, that stands fur thu fdurth lei':
ami '
'Never mind. Alarm : I knock under.'
thn Deacon,
'Ob, hn,' says aunt Becky. 'Guns Ihreetimet.
In ! I gues uuxt time you want blue vitril, you
tvill come and ask inu beloro you snnd vour uion.
oy all Ihe way to Portland. I've got enuu"li tu
pii'i'i hi i me nurses in inu male ol Maino.
I lie Ditacon thought the least said the soon
est mended, as things Mo.nl, and he saw the evil
our in Soke's eye. So he gathers uiihis'lnrse
physic, anil was marching olras stiff as a ghost,
hutjubt as ho opened the d nr the sasy jade
ups and puts her band on his s'loulder, and -a)
she, 'Eli, ho-ep dark!' The Deacon went out,
slamming the door behind hiiti, jot as h ird as he
con il slain it.
Without losing a minit, ho went right nfTto
call Bivins to account, Androw met him hall
way, coming In get his money, and hu bail
story to tell that soon blopped tho Deacon's
fetch a job as ho had to aim no more than
oiio single dollar 1 From the time he landed in
tho cily till hn started hack..he had done noth.
ing hut hunt for Ihat are stuff. Ho had been al,
over town, and enquired of everybody, and w
luck, till ho cairio to a barber's shnp, whore
there wa a uiaii settilig in the chair, a I lather
ed up tn the eyes. As snon as he heard BivinV
question, ho spit the suds away from his mouth,
at'd, avs he, 'WImi's that you want, Bivins 1'
Well, now,, if tint aint Dr. .Westbrook.!
Wvp, I couldn't see ye forsdapV , ,
I handed him a paper", and he took and read
it, and, says he, 'ivhat fool ii this',, that's been
fobbing off his Latin upon you; Bivins? Go
right up there to the sign of the mortar and
isk for a pound of blue vitro); and you'll get
wh it you want.'
nm, Doctor, '
,Go long you fool, and do as I tell ye'. And
when you meet another ass that pokes hit lam
ing at you, hit him a rap nvcr the head.' ,
'And now Deacon, I should like to know
what you meant by fobbing ofT ynur Latin Upon
me, and sending mo chasing all over the world
for blue vitrol, tint can be had anywhere.'"
Well, the Dacnu has got Ihe genuine sul
phate al last ; but Fence it turns nut to be noth.
ing but blue vitrol, he Ins no faith in it. He
says nnt a mite shall goon his head till he hears
the opinion of Bivins' doctor. He has no mind
to have his scalp tanned and curried all at once.
But this is nothing now. The Dearon would
give all the hair nn his head to save hischarac.
ter. The upshot of the matter is, he is in a
quandary. Peter Waazel talks louder and
louder every day. He put" the screws to Bivins
as often is he can catch him, and the more lie
he gets out of him, the harder ho holds on lo
his superstition. He Ihreitetied to bring the
matter before the society anj from there it will
go to the church. And 'e ml the Deacon will
do I can't tell. If he can make a straight clear
story out of it, he will do more than I ran.
And this aint all. Between you and I, mat.
tors and things have gone great lengths be
tween him and widow Green. Aly wife knows
ill iibdiit it, and she Ihinks jumping over the
broom. stick ought to follow soon; and for this
lireo Sundiy forenoon I have gone to meetin
-artin sure each lime tint I should hear Almira
Green and K Carpenter break the windows,
and not a wind inun the minister yet. Hero is
ano'her snarl fur the Deaton toontwist, I guess.
Lady's Bonkfir May.
TtIIH LA .11 12 PIG
f Prom the 'Rover' copied from a foreign miscellsnj .
Mrs. M'Crie, Charles Mallhews' old
Scotch l.nly, wits simplicity itself, and her
lie.irt overflown! with the wannest affections
iil'liuni in nature. Air, Josiali Flinverileiv,
of Al inrhester, had occasion to visit Edin
burgh, tint iVee-slone village which Scots
men call ii iiietniiolii, silualeil ;i mile or two
from Leilh, .1 sou-port town on the liver
r,.ni, II.. I .... I ,. i. (,,. ,,i i,,,.,: i
the Itev. Dr. and Airs. Al'Cue, ami was re
ceived l ilieni wtili nil the IV ink nnd cour
teous kindness of their disposition.
One .Sunday, after having nttoinleil divine
servicii in the doctor's church, ho relumed
with his liospiiabbi friends to their residence.
A nice, hot, tasty, hut frugal dinner, whs
quickly pi iced upon the table.
' Oooil folk hunger after tliu word,' ob
served thu old lady, pulling ;t haddock of
fourteen inches lung, wild nn ocean of oys
ters and liulter. nn Jnsiah's plain ; " iind'l.i'
n willy wiitight of tint Alihiga ii'sgusiy and
p'riesnine j our guid man was dry in the ptil
pit, iind yo Inin as guid right to be dry out ul'
it hem ! Excuse nie; doctor Lord, sir,
ye arc fillltlg your Hands'.'
Mr. Josiali was devoted admirer rii"llie
f,,r Ei.r 'tnrl cntil .lttt ljn (ullittl itl ;,.',i,t
and wrinkled face niel his gaz", fail to re- I
i.i. . i , , , 1 1
menu er mat imce urn siinm rnei-K was tiyeu
with the hue. of the rose, and the ryes cast a
lustre which would have, maddened nn an
chorite. Hu therefore, nut of devotion to
what was past, :i!h ami drank as directed of
what was present. After having in this fash
ion labored with u vigor and industry which
wool I have done credit lu an Irish laborer
deepening llie Thames, or a student nfSlin
kounlee i-itliiig ut i iuiiprelieniling thu last
number of tint Kdiiiliurch Review, hit was
constrained, from tthsolutii want of local ca
pacity, In givu over ' to cease lo labour, to
dig, and to delve,' in a horrid brute, of the
binl species, which must have been cousin
gentian to tint p'ongiiins of the Falkland Is
lands. ' The 'lither leg, Mr. Jjisiah t'owderjew ?'
5)11 Ihe doctor. 'Thn 'lither leg, doctor!
Al ty 1 perish if mm joint of the whole car
case liiii itioved ihe flutier of ii goal's wing,'
answered J ni ih. ' Ye are owor genty with
llie beast, Air, riiiwilerdevv,' observed llie
uld lady. ' 0 iclor, mark vo that, and abuse
niii' m m's glide mime; Itive it sir rivt; ii.'
' Il is lengli il is, (iffi verily,' saiJ llm doc
tor, as his eye-toot snapped in it struggle
witli a tendon, which would have, held Ins
majesty's yacht in H hurrimne. 1 And Idnth
snnin forhyt',' observed Mrs. M'Criej ' hiit
il's wring to sport ivn' a human creature's
distresses. Na, na, Mr. Josiali, ye np.edna
look sait wao like. Possession, liuo doubt,
is nine points nl Ihn law ; hut tho rightlul
owner ol that yellow stump is lung syne
eatliereil id Ins lorliears. Ul a truth,!! would
bu :in iiwl'u' moment gin he cam to vindicate
his am.'
.Mr, Flowerdew shuddered, and for rea
sons ihat can very well be understood, agreed
most lieanilv with his hostess. ' But as I'm
in that land of thu living!' continued Mrs.
M'Ci'ie, 'uurtaiipy i.is.s has a'thegether neg
lected ihe sxllaliuli; 'i'heru it stands, in the
prulti iif its beaiitv, in tho aumry. Surely
I inlliTii carried mvsell: , Doctor, whenev-
I'ryo'u gun by thu liiiuruiid five liiiintles, I'm
clean dune for ;iny m iir usu thai day I can
llmdiiaeihing.' Neither can I, Airs; M-
Crie,' observed Mr. Jniah,' answered (he
old lailv : ' ii" I had minded h' I've hevd
right, I woiild liy ibis time have been de
mented. Right, niV dear,' replied the doc-
lor. thu femalu is th weaker vessel n
cracked pitcher, as a man niay say; and in
tin way fit to be the repository ,or the won
ders of airl and science.' .Tnd yni,' re
torli'd Mrs. M'Crio, somewhat piqued ill the
observation, thorn dro some airl, df ilio
whilk yn are us ignorant at a dea!d dog la
ving thu coiiinriilion,' 1 Ami in what, may
I hu pcrmitlnd lo ask?' answered the. doctor,
willi much solemnity. 'In what T Ye see,
Mr. L'lurlinw,' hu added, ' I in nao wiso es
chew thn inquiry.' No, then, gudeman,'
exclaimed iho old lady rxultirigly, 1 1 hae
vou nuwjin Iho hip that u umi taveui
excusn the expression, Mr. Josiali : w are
plain folk.' ' Madam,' answered Mr. Flow
ordow, makn no apology. Tho recollec
tions nre delighlful. Ihavuihany warm em
1 1 races of llie kind. But pray, madam, don'i
let us lose the advantage of knowing in what
manner of lore you transcend tho doctor.
Pray ho so condescending.' ' Nay, kind
sir,' said the old lady, il's a joke of my own,
but as it is connected with that very sylla
bub that our lass has set before you.'l shall
ask the doctor again. Ye that ken the throe
wonderful tilings in the world, yea the four
wonderful things nnd strange, how mak yp
the syllabub ?' ' I tak the lass,' 1 Whisht,
doctor ; gin ye begin that gate,' interrupted
the old lady, ' I maun bu llio expounder of
the text myself. So ye sue, Mr. Flower
dew '
But before the secret is disclosed, we must
inform our readers lliat there is a certain jug
or pipkin.df.earthenware used In various culi
nary nnd detergent purpose's In Scotland,
called a ' pig,' and which, from llie tenacious
kind of earth (laatH.br liiaiiij of which it is
composed, goes by tlin distinctive name of a
' lame pig j n tilensil of which, fifty years
ago, to have been ignorant, would have been
a confession of stiiilific.ilioii as great as if you
thought that the Red sen was. rubicund.
' So, sir, continued Mrs. M Cri.', ' when
I wanl to make a syllabub it's, grand for a
cold, nr a knitting in the throat '
' Yes, it's nae doubt of healing virtues,'
observed the doctor ' medicinal in all mat
ters tlmracicnl, if I may use the expression ;
nnd, Mr. Flowerdew, il has the advantage of
being divertive and jocund in llio swallow.
Sir, I hold in utter execration your sennas
and globaras; the latter are, of a early, au
abomination beforo thu Lord. I mice had a
dose thereof gin I live to the age of Aielhu
saluni, the day will he lo me liku yestreen :
they took a good forty minutes to chow, my
inside was ciirniiirriitg like duos in a docket.
It was most special unsavory, Mr. Sour-spe-v.'
' So,' continued the old lady, after an Im
patient pause ; ' I send lo llie market and
our Bell brings me a tame pig.'
' But why a lame pigP
' Why a lame pig, sir what way no?
Sir; naeiliing but u Iamu pig will answer the
' I cry you mercy, good lady.'
' So our Hell brings me a lame pig. I
nye tell our lass (she. has been wi' us llicsn
thirteen years, rums Martimus ; she is the
O of her grandlallier, as the dortor says,
w hen he is facetious,) lo pick tile but a clean
' Very right,' said Mr. Josiali. 1 But I'm
afraid you would have lillle choice in ihat re
pert.' ' Yo aro wrang, Mr. Cowprsew,' said the
doctor, ' they liie weel waslicd outside and
1 Oh, doctor, no joking, this is a serious
1 Na ; (here's no joking,' observed the
old lady. 4 They aro weel scraped wi' ii
heather ringe. '
1 A what, madam V ,
A nivefu' o' heather; wi' the whilk you
r-et even lu the iriost extreme corner of the
4 No doubt, madam, if you are permitted.'
4 Permitted, Mr. Josiali! and gin I buy a
iig, may 1 no do what I cliuse wi' it ? nr
wi' ony itber face of clay for which I gave
ready cuinzie T Ye have, sir, great 'charac
ter in England for cleanliness, and I am
sure, lliat Mrs. Flowerdew never has a pig in
her aught but shn washes il inside and out,
ui clean as tint driven snaw,'
4 Nay in that,' said Mr. Flowerdew, ' I
cm assuro you you aro mistaken. Before
the pigs reach us
4 Weel, weel ; itber folk do if, and that is
llio same thing. So, when Bell come hame,
I says, hand me down the can with the vir
gin honey, and I drap twa dessert spoonfuls
into the pig's mouth '
1 Into its mouth, madam f
4 Ay, to ho sure, sir ; where would you
have it put 1 a pig's mouth was na gin tn il
for naething or jelly ill do as weel. Na,
I've tried your large bergumnt preserved
pear ; bm whiles the pig's deck is no thai
wide to admit ii pear nf tliat size, and it's
fashions squeezing it in.' ,
4 No douhl, niadani anil dangerous.'
4 Yes, gin llio neck break ; but when ye
mell and meddle wi' pigs, yemauii mind ye
dual wi' slippery pear.'
4 Very true, madam !'
4 Weel, then, our lass carries the pig to
llio cow, and there she gently milks a pint
rind a half of warm milk in upon the honey
or jelly or pear, as ii may he.'
4 into the pig, madam V
' Ay, iutd ilto mouth o't. Surely that's
nae kiltie matter. '
' Now, madam, as I am an ordinary sin
ner, that is an operation that would puzzle all
Lancaster. , Into its mouth !'
4 Weel, I'm astonished al.yoii sir ; is there
ony mystery or sorcery in Bell hauling a pig
wi' the tae hand, and milking a cow with the
4 1 really; madam, in my innoccne of heart,
thought that ihn pig might have run '
4 Hun o'ort Nau duiihl ; so wild it gin
yn filled it o'er AT. So hame comes the
4 Ofitself, madam!
1 Sir ! Lord, sir, you speak as if the pig
could walk !'
' I beg yon a thousand pardons, madam ;
I truly forgot tho milk and jelly. It would
ho pxlraordinary if it could.'
4 Very sir. So the lass brings mo my lame
P'S-'i . .. . .
4 Ah, that's another reason. Well, may I
bo drawn tn a thread if I, coulii divine why
you .preferred a lame pig.'
4 Yu needna gang lo lloiiin to Inarn that ;
a lame is aye fendiost. So I begin to steer
and steer the milk and jelly.'
4 Steer and steer, nladam !'
4 Ay mix ' woel up thegViher.
4 And may I enireat lo know with what
you stir it V
4 Wi' a spoon to b sore ; ye wadoa hao
mo do it wi mv fingers?'
4 God forbid, madam ! I would use. if
heaven aver employed inn in tha manner you
mention, a tpoon with a most respectable
I lone handle.'
I It'a better of length, certainly, sir. Nae
thing can escape you, then ! Weel, the
next thing we do is this, to gently put tho pig
before the fire to simmer.'
4 To simmer !'
1 Yes, sir; and there it stands nr it reeks
again. But you mtist not lei it gel o'er htl ;
it would burn the milk.'
4 And the pig; tno, madam.'
' Uh ! that's naethinc. We dinna fash
ourselves ,wi' the Hie1. What wero they
made fort'
4 Why, truly, rhadam, I though, until this
day, ihat I knew sorilblhing of their history ;
but I dud t have been wofully ignorant.'
4 Wo ennna reach nerfertiiiii ut nnm.
our glide marl says (wha hy-the-hy, is and
nas ueeu mis uau nutir, as sound as a top.)
And so, after the pig Ills simmered, yo in
wi' tho spoon again,'
4 Again madam 1'
4 ly.sir ; ye wadnalide it all in a mess at
the bottom V
4 Far from it madam ; as far as possible.'
4 So ycinaungic it another stir or twa, un
til it sings'.'
4 Sings, madam 1 And does llie pig nuke
no other nuise during all this operation V
4 Scat re any other, gin it's a good pig ;
hut all depends on that. I've seen a lame
pig that before the heat had touched its sides
a matter of fiye minutes, mould have ganc
oil" in a crack','
4 1. don't wonder at that; in the least ma
dam.' 4 You would wonder; if your English pigs
had half the valuo of the Scotch.'
' Possibly, madam,'
' Of a verity,4 continued Mrs. M'Crie,
4 there was a pig played mo anco u insist
mischancy trick. Yu see, I expected a par
ty of our presbytery lo doiincr.and I had sent
our Bell out for thu maisl capacious pig she
could grip; and I had poured in the quan
tam $uff, as the mediciners say, of bet mil!,
on the gooseberries (I was makiiip a nriisei
and a4 wentweel ; but when I thuught il was
done lo a hair, out lap a bet aizle ; our Bell
(the hizxv !) SlirillK? to the tin' sf.Ie the nh.
gaed the lither a' wac ruined.4 '
And tliu poor pig--what became of it?'
4 Puir, Indued ! It iiasna worth thn mind
ing t ils head was dung in, and it gat a
sunt1 Ir iclurc on the side : hut as il was lino.
ny in its color, and geniy in its mak, Bell
syned it otH in clean water, then riihhe.l it
up wi' a duster; and clapped it on llie, she f
in uie Kitcnen, wiiere it lies lo litis bjessed
day, in peace and quiet, as may say. In my
opinion, sir, tliu pig hadna lieJn right made.'
4 Not right made, madam I4 ,
' Niit right made, sir. You look surpri
sed. Think you ony body can mako a pig?'
Ter fiom il, madam.'
4 1 1 would suri-ly fatdi you and me, I'rii jit
lousing, Mr. Jusiah Flowerdew:4
4 Admitted, madam, admitted. But. mv
dear Mrs". M'Crie. I have hist ami other
thing lo ask". Yuii have told me (hero
Josliua cave a shudder I IOW till, nitlL' nml
li'onuy gets in1. Now, madam, may. I bo al
lowed to ask, how you get the syllabub out!
4 How we get it out Lord, sir, vou.sur
prist; mn ! Just the way we put it in. How
would you get it out 1 Sure there's rlae
magic in that !'
4 Nay, nladam; I don't pretend to venture
upon any speculations otrtho point. There
aro niany reasons, no doubt, why the pig
would easier let it nut than in n,l l am
quite willing to preler tho mouth. But, af
ier n is out, pray, madam; who eats the svl-
Iniutli t .1 . J -
......... .-7-ui, ju, iimudiii, uo you also cat
the pig t
4 Ha, ha ! that's gude. Lord sir, the pig's
as hard as a staue !
4 Ged, madam, you are right ; I had for
got thu frviuir. But as lo ihe mill- n.l
or the bergamot pear, after iho pig's, fur
wnose loiesuues are iney devoted r
4 Pray, madam.who devours that V point
ing with his fincer to iho horrid nniinn l.o-
fore him.
4 You, sir, if you will do me that honor.4
4 Me, madam ! Me! Good night, ma
dam. Pray don't waken the doctor. I am
pailicularly engaged. Nay, rriadam, not a
morsel I wuiild as soon bolt a barbecued
toad; or mouth a curried ht dge-ling( I do
eiilreai you lu keep it for the next presbyte
ry. If ther reseriihlo our clergy in the south,
they are more familiar willi pigs than I am.
Well, well !' Mr. Flowerdew
. w --- . ld III HII4 U
.exclaim, as he, in a manner, tumbled down,
in has'e, Irom lop 10 the bottom of the itair,
4 1 have often hraril ihat ilw Ai-md,
dirly ; but, by all the stripes in a yard of
giugiiaiu, iney were oorn uartianan !'
4 Mr. Doursmw !' eiclairried. the doctor,
awakening. 4 Where are ybu ? Here's my
ifu with thu svllabub
Vhere are you, Mr.
4 I'm off!' answered Mr. .Incinl, nn.l U
is said by his friends, that during a long life.
of SOlile Set'Rlltv veart nn nnpcin.ini, ..a. .1,1
i r r ' j,--.-, .... wuiu
induce him ever again to visit Edinburgh.
i no lame pig,- ne wouio mutter to himseir,
Tliu iellv and lint milk I Ifi-ai-im .nu
from such a calamity !'
O signifies iiandchiM.
The tis St" lite word 41 Present " in thp
superscription 'of letters, has been explained
to mean lliat the recipient of.i teller is in the
same cily, town or village wit,h lite wriler.
A correspondent of the Boston Courier gives
another explanation and A better uiie thus :
In legal instruments wo constantly find
this strange form of expression 44 Know all
men by liete presents: " 44 To all persons
lo whom these jiietnti shall come," &,c. a
liiomtcr ia Cnglisli grammar, every, where
except with the legal profession. But this
English cipressioil lias arisen from a barba
rous and inexact translation of the old Latin
lorm ofsiieji instruments Sciant oinnes per
has protsentei Uteres, &r. tie. Latin word
litcras being entirely omitted in the trash-
ion, and prceientes being rendered by the
English plural.prrienj a word which seee
to he neither substantive nor adjuciive, ac
cording to tho geural Mod of annlyiing
our language.
Now it is tn ba observed, that the legal in
strument alluded to. were in the form of lei
Ur or epittUt ; tnd the true rendering ef
the Latin formula above, eheuk have bweu,
" To all men to whom this present letter
shall come " 44 Know nil men by this pre''
sent letter," not Utters, for that is a barba
rous literal rendering of the Latin 'plural ?i
lira; which word, in that language, mm;
bo in the plural when used to signify a letter
or epistle.
Now the use or irle word present, in the
address of a common teller', is derived froni
this same source. We know, Irom ancient
original letters, (of which I have specinicnr
before me of 1697, and other elates;) that ii
was formerly the practice, in llie superscrip
tion of ii letter; to add; after the name of tli
person addressed, the words these present
and sometimes in a more abridged furm,
simple These that is, (in full,) Theseprt
sent letters, according lo the ancient formula.
I have now before me an oiiginal official let
ter, from an officer of this state; the addreai
of which is in this form
To tho Selectmen of
. These present.
An'dtlie'r original letter, now before rnej
(from Governor Stoughton, in 1G97, is di
reeled thus :
On his Ma'tys service
To Major John Higginsoo
A letter lo llie Mayor would, accordingly,
have been addressed, 44 To ihe Mayor of
Boston, These present"
That this was the origin of the custom
there can bo no doubt. By degrees, howev
er, the furcc of th? wltole expression being no
longer understood and felt, nnd become old
fashioned while the word present had some
apparent applicability the original expres
sion has been shortened down to that word
alone. But as tliu lib aye now is to omit the
antiquated fiirin, and merely to name tho
tok'n, (wiiere correspondents reside in dilTer
ont towns,) we ought b atialoVy, when they
live in the sunu towh, to nn nn; the street or
square; withodt tho old word Present.
The National Intelligencer remarks that
thu following paragraph corroborates th
views of a physician of Louisiana as to his
method of preventing hydrophobia. The
paragraph says t
"New KcMr.nr ros Hyrnoruom. Dr. Ifrller, of
the 'loyal AciuViuy of Medicine, , Pari', lately com
uiuniciifi to his society that in Greece it is a prac
tice tu observe the tunzucs of those peraoni uhuhave
lecn bitten by cuss, because at ihe end nf civht or
nine day there appear on each aide of the tongnr, and
near Ihe upper part, pustules, called hjssts by the
(.rck-. These pustules contain the whole rabid
miller, and immediately tb"V sre cut out and the
wuunds caulcrizcd hydrophobia will be prevented."
The facts stated in this paragraph tally
exactly with a very full and interesting slate",
tnent riia.de luany years ago by a Russian
gentlerrian of great intelligence and high'
standing; in respect to the mode of treating
persons bitten by rabid dogs, in the pastoral
district of Ukraine.
Tliu gentleman to whom wo refer was
Mr. Alexander Ensinphievp, for many years
Russian Consul at Boston. The substance
'of his statement was that when among the
shepherds of the district mentioned any one
was bitten by ii mad dog it was the uniform
practice lb watch daily and-carefully for the
appearance of the pustules under the tongue,
which always appeared in due time as the
first specific consequence of the virus cum
municated by the bile. As soon as they
came to a head they wero lanced, and the
mouth was thoroughly washed, or rinsed, ta
prevent the virus from being agaiti taken in
to the system.
This washing, or rinsing, was done with a
decotion of the yellow broom, which was al
so used for several days both as a gargle and
a drink. This treatment, it was alleged;
was universally and confidently relied on as
perfectly effectual, when carefully and faith
fully observed, as a perfect preventive of the
disease ef hydrophobia, which never makes
its appearance, according to the statement,
until after the pustules, when neglected, have
bhiken and the virus has been again taken
dp by the absorbents, after which only do t lid
terrible spasms of tlie throat and the horror
of water come upon the patient ; and then he
is past cure.
To strengthen the confidence which he
claimed fur Ids account of this dread malady:
its characteristic devclopemcrii; progress and
treatment, Mr. Eustaphieve added that he
was himself a native of the- Ukraine, where
his father lived and practised medicine as
regularly bred physician, and ho made his
statement froth his own personal knowledge
of the facts embraced in it, and from the
practice of hii Tatlicrin such cases.
Tho statement was, as we well rreollcet;
very generally circulated in the newspapers
of this country, many years ago. The last
republication ot it, so tar as we now remem
ber, was in 1830 or 1831, or thereabouts;
and though we hao not seen it since, yet
the impression we took of it was so strong
lliat wo feel conf.dent tvo have given its main
points accurately:
lite statement referred to by the Nation-
al Intelligencer as having been made by a N.
Orleans physician, was published in our pa
per at lull length, nn friday tliu 10th nist,
On recdrring lo il wo sec thai it refms lo ii
lecture on this interesting subject, delivered
in Paris as long ago as 1S20, by Marecliilti;
a physician of high standing. "Vt now re
' it . .1.... at. t- ... . i ! . .
iuuci! ma, int. cusiapiimve, in ins state
ment, mentions the same physician, as hav
ing obtained the materials of ids lecture in
Russia, and that hu refers lp tho stmo prae
tico mentioned by himself.
Tuz American is too hard unon the eeremxn
of kissing the Ladies which was performed by
President Tyler at se'voral places during his re.
tcni mutruN, it siriscs un tuai il young uxro.
tels do not object id being kit-red 'before folk'
by a widower of 5(1, no one eh-e bus any right
to demur. John Jones's nisliprnri inquiry wheth.
er they kissed the nun or the office will of course,
nuke some of them feel rather qualmish, but
they must remember that it is John, and that
.tupidity is a way he hsr. Our neighbor slmuli
'let the girls alone,' dcrpite the PtceideoVe bad
There,, arrived at St. Louir, during the.
week eliding on the 10th instant, upwards of
aixiy steamboats; and at many depejled. J
The river was in fine navigable ordcx, ri
trade tk very hti.tJa!ivit 4.-

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