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GREEN MOUNTAIN FREEMAN.
,.m.f In the Brick Block. Bm4 of HUM Street.
I so if raid In advance; otherwise, tuu.
l aruirut titty be nude bj mall or otherwise to
H R. WUEELOCK,
Editor and Proprietor.
rue imfi. under the recent law of Cowrreaa
nrt'ulatM free in W aehiuatou County. On ail paivra
,, u: (,utide Waeliinittun County, the loatane la paid
,,, the ,.ubmsberettueoQii.eui Montpelier.
TERMS FOR ADVERTISING.
For one aunare nf 11 tinea or Imr nf Ante In mi
inwrtl.ni, $1 uu; for earn aubaeouent tnerrtiou. 2a eta.
a-wa tbi uuuiber 01 lufteruuun are uiaraed ou the ad-
vemarnifnt It will be cuullbued uutil ordered out.
tlamg by lb- )car.
ll uisuul utaoe tu tuert -bauta eiid otueraadTer-
rroLattaiid iVmmieemucra Notirea.Sxuueacb.
Kir Noli, .-a of l.tberalioti. Katrai a, tii Formation
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Notires in bea-R roluiiiua. lueuta t.r line each in
at-ll.uu, l.ut nocbargea made of leaetuau&uceuta.
Notli-aof Diialbaaud Marrlareainerrtid gratia. bnt
"xb'bded obituary Ni.tirea of l'oetry Mill be charged
at tin- rati- nf ttve rente tier line.
MONTPELIER, VT., WEDNESDAY, JULY 9, 1879.
WEDNESDAY. JULY 9. 1879.
A letter from St. Landry parish, Louisi-in-i,
to llio New York Sun, says many of
the negro lalwrors propose to go to Kan
sas in ihe fall.
A trained kitten at North Berwick, Me.,
drinks milk out of an ounce vial, which it
Mis to its mouth with its fore paws. It
never takes it meal without wearing a bib
:inJ always bus itsniuuth wiped, afterward.
Thomas Hughes having been ap
plied to for permi-sion to print ' Juiu
limtvn" in raised characters for the blind,
grunted tliu desired permission and euclos
td a check to half pay the expense.
The Egyptian obolisk should he erected
in Grauiercy Park, New York, in front of
tint democratic, national headquarters in
tint city. It is covered all over with
ciphers. Washington Republican.
Siime ill-na'urctl fellow, wbo is Jealous
of the Buckeye sta'e, Says that the minor
is contradicted that an Ohio mm tele
graphed to President Hayes to keep the
position of prince imperial opon to him.
Annoyed because they can bring no
d im ming chargi; against tho republ'can
cand 'lute for governor ill Ohio. I he (Jin
c nniti Enquirer has taken to spelling his
name "Chaw Its l'hawsiah." Awful hard
up for weapons, aren't they?
The largest oyster ever found was one
laken at Mobile in 1810. It measured
three feet and one inch in length, and
twenty-one anil one half inches in breadih
across its widest part. It was openod and
served up in a savory stew.
A young man who went from Iowa to
I.eadville about six weeks ago, writes
cheerfully back to his friends: " I have
gained three pounds sinco I caine hpre and
; lined it all in half ounce installments
Haven't been shot in the head yet."
Speaking of Grant and his travels, the
Boston Transcript remarks that if there is
one thing more than another that army
life brings to n man, it is the rare (for
Americans) accomplishment of loafing,
contentedly, by the month iind year.
Watterson is anxious and worried over
the democratic prospect in Ohio. He now
a-ks his democratic brethren in that lively
stale to let the financial differences go and
light the campaign for the obliteration of
sectionalism from politics and "on con
Butler's prospects are said lo be good in
the line of governorship. Representative
men of the " Widow " wing of tho Mas
sachusetts democratic party statu that he
will receive and accept the nominatinn
both from the labor reform and democratic
conventions this fall. They say reports
have been received from the largest
towns in the stale during last week, and
with but a single exception theso reports
favored Butler's nomination. They say
their convention will lie held in Worcester
in .September, but the gubernatorial nom
ination of llutler will be made previously
by either the labor reform or greenback
Tim Spartanburg (S. C.) grand jury
evidently believe in capital punishment.
Judge Pressley of tho court of general
sessions called their attention to the recent
lyncliing of John J. Moore, the villain
who ravished and then murdered a youn
woman, as an unlawful act. The jury
examined into and reported in justification
of the lyncliing, as an outburst of populnr
indignation which merely anticipated the
sentence of the law of the land. Further
more, went on to charge the increase of
crime in tho slate to the substitution of
penitentiary di-cioline for tho gallows.
franklv admitting that they h id little faith
in the relormation o! criminals.
The other day a I'lattsburg fisherman
caught a five pound salmon near the
in null of the S iranac the first one taken
in these waters for over forty years. They
once swarmed at the mouth of the Saranac
and ureat numbers wero speared there.
and the question is, Is this salmon one of
the old stock which followed the custom of
its remote ancestors, and strayed from the
sea up the St. Lawrence and Kichelieu
rivers into Lake Champlain, in search of
the old snawnins beds in tho Saranac
river, from which they were shut off hj
dams nearly it century ago; or are they
some of the results of Seth Green s alleged
salmon stocking of Lake Cham plain a few
Somo four or five years ago General
Beauregard was serenaded in Biliiiuoie
by some young bloods who made lauditory
speeches in praise ol the cliiellain, at tile
same time triumphantly declaring that
they were not conquered in the conflict
with the north, but merely overcome by
numbers. After listening to the cheap
bravado, Heauregar! said: " Gentlemen,
did any of you do any fighting during the
late war? lo tins mere was only a neg
ative response. " Well, gentlemen, I did
do somo fiirh'ing. and I was conquered
Good night, gentlemen." Beauregard ha
since that day been treated by the south
with the same contempt that has been lav
ished upon Longstreet,
Ileal estate 19 rising in Now York, under
the clear indications of a general revival
of business. A lame block of real estate
was sold there, last week, for $100,000
more than the sum at which it was la-t
summer offered, without eliciting a single
bid. The Philadelphia Ledger, nlluding
to the excess of 8 202,940 bushels of
wheat and of 1.075.605 bushels of corn in
our grain exports of tho past eight wocks
over those ol the samo period last year,
and to the promiso of the great southern
cotton crop, says that " the actual work-
ingmen of tne country are io-uay more
fully employed and at belter wages, the
purchasing power of money considered,
ihnn Ht any poiiod since tho disband nicni
of the armies at tho close of the war."
I may claim to have been one of the
aspo.-tles of independent journalism, bin
the zeal of the new converts has quite left
me among ihe old fogies. It never occur
red to me that in refusing lo obey blindly
every behest of a party it was necessary to
keep aloof from parly to shut off one's
self from the sole agency through which,
among free people, lusting political results
can be attained. A government like ours
without parlies is impossible. Substantial
reform can only be reached through the
action of parties. The true statesman and
tho really influential editor are those who
arc able lo control arid guido parties, not
those who waste their strength in. merely
thrusting aside and breaking up the only
tools with which thoir work can bo done.
Whilo there is little need of cautioning
the majority of people against exposing
themselves during a thunder storm, the
killing of two children in a summer house
near New York on Sunday is a reminder
of the possibilities in an electric visitation
None but the foolhardy, igi orant of what
is known about atmosplioric electricity,
and what takes place in a lightning
stroke, will neglect to watch the probable
nearness of approach of tho electric cloud.
and take measures accordingly, such as
removing from the vicinity of tall isolated
objects, avoiding currents of air, and get
ting awav from chimnovs and walls. Pro
fessor Olmstcad used to say that more
people were killed annually by lightning
lhan by railroad and steamboat accidents
put together. Transcript.
The Benefits of Pure Water.
The following is an extract from an in
teresting paper which was read beforo the
franklin county farmers club recently by
Geo. H. Wood:
Mr. Wood says: The quality of water
we use for domestic pui poses, dunking
and cooking, is a matter of vital import
ance. The heal h of almost every com
munity is almost in exact proportion to
the purity of the water which the people
are accustomed to use. Good, wholesome
water is beyond all price; foul waier is an
unmitigated curse; it is loaded with dis
ease and death and will sooner or later
provo a terrible scourge to all who use it.
1 he many questions relating to the pol
lution of English rivers were exhaustively
considered by a commission established
by act of parliament. Theso i-imimissiuii-ers
classify drinking water as follows:
Wholesome 1. Spring wajer: 2. JJep
well water: 8. Upland surface Water.
Suspicious 4. Stored rain water: 5.
Surface water from cultivated land.
Dangerous 0. Kiver water to which
sewerage gets access: 7. Shallow well
The above classification was established
by the commission after an examination ol
over 2,000 samples of water claimed to be
ilrinkablc. Ihe high character ot the
commissioners and ibeir exhaustive labor
should entitle their conclusions to great
weight. The point settled by the English
commissioners should be fixed in tiie pub
lic mind, and 1 do not see how 1 could
confer any more practical benefit upon the
rucnipcrs ol tins club man by maKing a
concise statement of the points settled by
this high authority:
1st. YV here a river or stream ol water
has been polluted by sewerage, in any
p u t of its course, it is polluted from that
Kint down to its mouth. lo river in the
flailed Kincdum is lony cnun?h to destroy
the ell'i el of sewerage when ouce received.
2d. lucre is no known procesB, natural
or artificial, to remove the sewerage con
tamination from water except by long
boiling or distillation, and, therefore, such
water should never be used for domestic
id. .No tillering ol any kind or descrip
tion whatever can remove the minute
germs of disea.-e which exist in dilute
sewerage waier not even liltratiou
through a solid stratum of chalk.
4th. Poisoned water is poisoned still,
however much diluted cveu whem chem
ical analysis can not detect tho slightest
contamination. Hence chominul analysis
U of no account except in casoa of gross
or sensible pollution, in which case it is
scarcely needed. The infinitesimal pois
oning ol water can only be determined by
tho increasing death rate among those
who usu it.
5ih. Any organic matter will poi.-on
water, and cannot bo removed except by
boiling or distillation.
Gib. T he most dangerous organic sub
stance is human cxcremcntal matter, and
specially so when from cholera and fever
fib. .shallow well water is tne most
dangerous of all waiers. Of four bun-
lied and twelve shallow wells examined
by the royal commissioners, they pro
nounce them all, with few exceptions, en
tirely unlit for human consumption. With
regard to filtering or disinfecting such
water, they mournfully add that disinfect
ants do not disinfect and filter beds do not
filter. Both attempts have been costly
How the Battle G hound of TrtF.
Wilderness Looks. I went over the
Wilderness route, writes a correspondent
of the Cincinnati Enquirer, n sight almost
all the way ol the leading roads on which
Lee s army hud moved out from behind
the llapidan to strike Grant in the line of
niaicli lor Kiclmiond. At this time no
railroad existed through the wilderness. A
narrow gauge railroad of very rough qual
ity, about thirty-nine miles long, now
reaches the whole distance from Orange to
Fredericksburg, passing within sight of
Chanoellorsville.within a short distauce of
the Wilderness tavern, and crossing Mine
Kun, where Meade lost so much time, on
a high, frail truslle: tho railroad also
crosses the lines of march of Grant after
he left his camps around Culpeppeer and
crossed the llapidan to llaccoon and Ger-
mania lords .
Tho Wilderness at the present day has
only changed as far as building small
si at ion -houses and incipient towns along
the railroad goes. It is one of tho poorest
pieces of country in v uginia, originally
dug over to find surface iron ore; theso ore
pits havo been changed by the rains into
gullies, which figured in the battles there
aliout. All the trees in sight are either a
sickly o ik or a stunted pine. There are
fi-w creeks of any kind running from the
Wilderness proper until you come to the
sources of the Maitupouy, where tho
country grows more fertile.
The Wilderness people are generally a
low order ot while, a rather better order
of negroes, and once or twice we encount
ered in suubonnets some quit! pretty Vir
ginia girls. This region is a sort of hill
land, between the sources o! various
rivers, whoso original soil of a clay mould
was washed off by the heavy rains, and
has long ago disappeared into tho river
They were getting out railroad ties at
about every point wo saw in the Wilder
ness, and also hoop staves tho former to
go to Ku rope. All the bodies on Wilder
ness and Chancel lorvillu battlefields have
been dug up and removed to the cemo
teries at Spotsylvania and Fredericksburg
those beaiuiliil cemeteries where almost
nil the dead are Unknown, but which nlone
embellish Ibis evil country, the deadly
mud-hole ol tho world.
A parrot created a sensation in a bag.
rage car on the Chicago, Burlington and
Quincy railroad tho other day. The cage
was enclosed in paper and set on a coffin,
and was soon forgotten. As the conductor
and other trainmen were passing through
the car they heard a sepulchral voice is
suing apparently from tho colhn, crying,
Lemmo out! They were startled and
frightened, and thought they had a sure
case of ghost, till Polly was discovered
whining for liberty.
An eminent physician in England has
recently published a work on longevity,
in which, after showing what has often
been shown before, that tho average life
of man has been somewhat extended
during the present century, ho gives
many reasons for thinking that this is hut
the beginning of a decided prolongation
in human existence, and that in no remote
future it may bo as common to hear ol
men living to a period between eighty
and ninety years of age, as in the past it
has been to have them reach the limit of
threescore years and ten.
The following is Bob Ingersoll's tribute
to the dead soldiers of the Union: "Theso
heroes are doad. They died for liberty
they died for us. They are at rest. They
sleep in the land they made free, under the
nartbey rendered stainless, under tue
solemn pines, the sad hemlocks, the tear
ful willows, and the embracing vines
They sleep beneath tho shadows of the
solemn clouds careless alike ot tne sun
shine or the storm, each in the windowless
nalnce of rest. Karth may run red with
other wars they are at peace. In the
midst of battle in the roar of conflict, they
found the serenity of death. I have ooo
sentiment for tho soldiers living and dead
cheers for the living and tears for the
The young people of tho mills treuerallv
read the Story papers, published (most of
lllt'lll) in New York citv, and devoted to
interminably "continued" narraiives, of ;
wh eh there nrn a v:.ua ihi-. n, f.,r s
process of publication in each paper. I
have read some of those stories. They
havo usually no vory distinct educational
quality or tendency, good or bad. They
aie simply gtorien, vapid, silly, turgid
and incoherent. As the robber heroes
are mostly grand looking fellows, and all
theladits have while hands and splendid
attire, it may be that some of the readers
find hard work more distasteful because
of their acquaintance with the gorgeous
idlers and thieves, who, in theso fictions,
are always so much more fortunate than
tho people who are honest and industri
ous. But usually, as I am convinced by
much observation, the only effect of this
kind of reading is thai it serves " lo pass
away the time," by supplying a kind of
entertainment, a stimulus or opiate for
the mind, and that these people resort to it
and feel a necessity for it in much the
samu way that others feel they must havo
whisky or opium. Tho reading is a nar
cotic, but it is less pernicious than those
Many hundreds of the older operatives.
especially foreigners, of two or three na
tionalities, were reading a paper which is
levoted to the liberation ol the workins
people of America. Its principal literary
attraction at this tiiuo is a very long atrial
story of the oven brow of the republic in
lBSli. ibis is written as it I lie events
which f nu the subject of the narraiives
had already occurred. It introduces Gen.
Grant as dictator, and describes elaborate
ly the character and cllccis of tbe terrible
lespotism which he establishes, m that
year, Uxm the ruins ot popular govern
ment. Ho "suppresses congress, seizes
New York city at the bead of an armed
force and by the assistance of the capi-
alists or " money power ot the coun
try, and is about lo make himself emper-
r, wnen the working people rise in arms.
under the direction of a nameless leader,
a man with the executive intellect of
Ca'-ar, Napoleon and Bismarck, and tbe
lofty impulses of Leonidas, Cincinnatus
and vt nslunglon. lo continue the de
scription of this personage, " ho was a
man ol Huge bulk and brawn, ins Head
was the size and shape of Daniel Web
ster's, who.n he greatly resembled, except
n being of tbe blonde type. His awlul
gray eyes had power in them far beyond
that of" the orbs of the indolent Webster."
The workingmen, soldiers of the new
evolution, are instructed by their hero to
supply their own needs from the abundant
stores of their neighbors, giving them re
ceipts in the name of the revolution for
the property thus forcibly appropriated.
Ibey accordingly seize the national banks,
ind help themselves to ns mucti money as
they desire. This story is read with deep
ntorest by many of the older operatives,
especially those who were interested in
labor retorm. ihe paper containing it
prints each week a declaration of princi
ples, which affirms that the government
should bold all tho land of tho nation;
that it should be without price (tbe free
use of as much as he can cultivate being
secured to every man); that ground rents
it towns and cities should be controlled
by government; that gold and silver
should bo demonetized, and that in their
stead absolute paper money should be is
sued by the government ; that interest on
money should be torbnldcn; that all
mines, railroads and highways should be
iwned and controlled by the government;
that the government ought not to inter
fere for the collection of debts between
individuals, but that the payment of debts
should bo left entirely to tho honor of tho
debtor. There should be an income tax
on all incomes above one thousand dol
lars, growing heavier for larger sums.
Eight hours' labor should be a legal day's
work, and the Senate of Hie United Slates
hould be abolished. Recently the paper
has devoted much space to the advocacy
of " ihe right ot tho people to free trav
el;'' the government shoti d own the
railroads, and tax capitalists to obtain
means for operating them, and people
who do not wish to pay fares should be
lermittcd to ride free. The paper has a
ame circulation among operatives, miners
and city mechanics in nearly all parts of
the country. It is a large sheet,
and is conducted w'ith much ability. It
always contains two or three serial stories
by popular writers, which are designed to
11 mi the heavier articles devoted to the
propagation of the doctrines of tho ngi-
ttors, wno seek to establish a universal,
international sovereignty of workingmen
upon principles and methods which con
tradict and oppose every essential of civ
ilization, ihe tone anil spirit of tho
paper are indescribably bitter, and ex
pressive ol intense hostility against the
possessors of property and culture. It
represents capitalists as a class of cruel
and inhuman oppressors, and instructs the
people that the time is at hand lor them
to seize tho righis of which they have
been so long deprived. All its teaching
is opposed to the spirit and principle of
nationality, and tends, so tar as It nas
Any effect, to produce social and political
disintegration. June Atlantic.
Not In. Governor Coke, of Texas,
tells the following siory : "l never saw
such a town as Washington. When I
one here to attend the .special session of
the Senate, I purposely went to a quiet
place, gave orders it anybody called to
have their cards sent up to my room, and
I hat the outside door should always be
kept closed, which would compel callers
to ring. Well, would you believo it, a
few nights ago 1 was sitting in my room,
when in rushed two gentlemen, unan
nounced. Said one of them: 'Governor
Coke, I believe. How do jou do. Gover
nor Coke?' Their manner disconcerted
me a little, but I answered as pleasantly
as 1 could : I est am liovernor Coke;
but bow in the world did you get in my
room?' They answered cheerfully : Oh
the lower door was opened, and wo just
walked right up.' I then told them that
it would please me if they would go down
stairs, ring the bell am) send up their
cards in tho regular way. Thoy both
went down stairs and did as I told them,
and then I sent them word that I was not
Lauok-Savino Bokax. Tho washer
women of Holland and Belgium, so pro
verbially clean, nnd who get up thoir linen
so beautifully while, use refined borax ns
a washing powder instond of soda, in the
proportion of a large handful of pulver
ized borax, to nbout ten gallons of boiling
wctor. They save in soap one-half. All
other large washing establishments adopt
tbe samo mode. For laces, cambrics, etc.,
an extra quantity of tho powder is used,
and for crinolines (required to bo made
vory stiff) a strong solution is necessary.
Borax, being a neutral salt, does not in
the slightest degree Injure tho texture of
the linen ; its effect is to soften the hardest
water and it should bo kept on every toilet
table. To the taste it is rather sweot, is
usod for cleaning tbe hair, is an excellent
dentifrice, nnd in hot conntriog is used
with tartaric acid and bicarbonate of soda
as a cooling beverage. Good tea eannot
bo made from harrf water; all water can
bo made soft by adding a teaspoonful of
pulvcrieed borax to an ordinary sized
kettle of water, in which It should boil.
Tho saving in the quantity of tea used
will bo at least one-filth.
THK BHOWN, Bl.l'K AND UKAY.
Uy H. C. PARHOHll.
The wau-hera were weary, aud train time was nigh,
We l"d Uw th" ent,' "i""1 th" wni' bed
The lip. were all aiieut. And eoft were the itfha;
Thelaeuea were billing tue boauurul eye.:
On tho rtirot ley the dark wavea that rippled with fold,
Ou the left flowed the silver that uerer was told.
Aud the riinr of tho rmvea between.
The brown ores Mid, cloeluir " I hope you'll be late:
The blue eyee yet tretnbled-How long cut you wait?"
The a-ray, dark with pleading, were cloaliur io prayer:
Tho hush uf d le angel waa atilUnv the air.
The brown haud. lay crowed aud preeaed In their place
The white haudxley loet iu the fold of the laoe;
lu velvet aud duuptea, the haud that waa atlrred;
The breath of the eleapere waa all that 1 heard.
Aud the Bhriek of the incoming train.
I twice kiaed the proud llpe,- -tho ruby lips twice.
The ilpa that wero poutlug 1 turned to the.n tbrlrft,
Then hurried forth in tho pitileas rain
Aud iuto the night on the outgoing train
Hut I thiuk while I bent over trepan aud bands
All uiy heart-stringii wero caught by the inotkiuleaa
For wherever 1 wait aud wherever I roam
They are driving me on, they are drawfug me home,
While 1 dream of the brown , blue and gray.
Tho Widow Grunt.
" Harry Fredericks, aged nineteen, shot
in the battle of Fredericksburgh."
Such was a part of the inscription upon
a plain marble slab in the little cemetery
Mrs. Grant, strolling by the grave, slop
ped for a moment lo read tbe simple
"Aged nineteen," she murmured. "Only
And then, as if by some subtle feeling
of sympathy, she sat down on the soft turf
near by and let her inougnis go wandering
back to that mournful time when so many
homes were so desolate, because their
"boys" were in the midst of danger and
Harry. ' Our Harry ' to somebody,"
she said to herself, gathering a spray of
myrtle that trailed about the grass, and
laying it tenderly in her palm. "A blue-
eyed, blonde-haired Harry, broad-chested
and strong-armed. A warm hearted big
sou led Harry, brave as a lion and tender
as a woman somebody s darling, some
body's stay and consolation."
The tears stood in the woman's eyes and
dropped over her cheeks. She, too, had
lust a Harry the love of her girlhood, the
husband of her young womanhood.
" I wonder who this Harry's mother
was?" she thought, "and if she is living
And then she tried to imagine how a
mother must feel when the child she had
nursed and reared, who hears nbout In
himself the very heart of her own being,
goes away to battle to kill or beikilled.
" It is bard,'' sho said, "hard, hard!"
And pressing her lips for a moment upon
the sod that covered the brave young
heart, she rose and walked away.
From the cemetery she went to the main
street of the town, and, going into a dry
goods store, proceeded to examine satins
"Can I have the goods on threc months'
credit?" she asked, after deciding upon
" No, madam," answered tho clerk,
curtly, " I have ordors to the contrary."
" Very well."
A desparing look fell upon the pale,
sweet face, ami Mary Grant walked out of
the store and to her little home of three
rooms over Tom Hanson's bakery.
What was she to do next ? Sarsnet & Co.
would trust her no longer, and they had
been her main dependenco. She sat down
in the middle of her liny shop, and looked
with n sort of stolid grief at the specimen
Rennets nnd hats that should have been
finished long ago, and at the old ladies
caps that seemed, in their grim imperlur
ability, to be giving her a silent lesson
upon the lallacy ol human hopes.
How she hated them at that minute, this
little milliner, who six months before had
sat contentedly making these same caps.
with their black dotted laco and purple
hows nnd illusion rucbings! But, then,
she was sustained by hope, und that makes
all the diilcrcncc.
Mary Grant, n soldier's widow, cume to
Allan lale with less lhan $50 capital in her
shabby little wallet. Shu had a few pieces
of furniture, and a letter of introduction
to Sarsnet Sc Co. from a city merchant who
had done the linu many a good turn hrst
and last. With these assets and sundry
liabilities, the young widow bad hoped to
strike a favorable balance, and build up a
business by wnicli she could support a
Bui she had not been fortunate. In the
first place, Mahitable Pillsbury, an old
maid, with bank hills as numerous as her
wrinkles, had set up a business a block or
two away. Her show-window was gor
geous with pattern hats, rich ribbons and
laces, and she kept a standing advertise
ment in the Allandale Enterprise.
It made little difference that Mary
Grant's millinery wits artistic, whilo Miss
I'lllsbury's was only showy and "stylish.
The Allandale fair ones were not artistic
themselves, and aimed at nothing higher
lhan keeping up with their neighbors. So
it happened that the widow's hats and caps
stood upon their standards, till as I have
saiil, they seemed to leer at her with ridic
ulous nnd accusing aspect.
She could not make her first payment
to Sarsnet & Co. on timo. They gave her
an extension, but she failed again to pay
the whole amount, and at last, as we have
seen, the firm refused lo trust her for
She sat thero, thinking of those disap
pointments, and wondering, in a dull way,
what she should do in the luture.
" I'll clear tbe show-window," she said.
' nnd put up a tin sign for plain sewing.
or lino washing. I should like the wash
ing best. Wouldn't that be a bitter pill
for the aristocratic Grants! At any
rate, I believe I could earn my living that
way, and now I am getting in debt evory
Just at Mrs. Urant arrived at this disa
greeable conclusion, the shop-bell rang.
homebody lor a yard ol live-cent rib
bon," she muttered going languidly to the
door nnd opening it.
A bright, sweet-laced girl of twelve
years or thereabouts, ramo in and asked
for a straw hat. While the milliner showed
her assortment, tho child explained that
she also wanted a bonnet for their baby,
" She's two years old," added tho cus
tomer, " and I want something suitable."
" Why didn't vour mother come and
bring little Sally?" asked Mrs. Grant.
" We haven't any mamma; at least, not
hero in this world. She died two years
ago when baby was born."
" And who keeps house?"
"I do," answered the child, quite simply.
"Yes. Papa is loo poor lo hire a house
keeper. Aunty Baker, mamma's sister,
wants him to break np, and let hor have
baby; but papa and I can't bear to, and so
I'm housekeeper, and papa helps me.
Aunty says it's ridiculous; but we would
rather have our own home wouldn't you,
" Indeod I should, my dear,'' answered
the widow, her eyes glistening.
" You soe," said the girl, growing quite
confidential in Mary Grant's sympathetic
atmosphere, " my papa's a minister. He
proaches at Hunt's Corner. His church
is small, and they don't pay him much."
" And there's nobody homo but you and
papa and baby?"
" No. We had Harry once, but he
went to war. Papa thinks mamma was
never so strong after that. He thinks if
Harry had staid at home mamma might
have lived. You see, she used to llo father's cheek and kissing him. now lean
awake nights and think about him, and ing on her friend's shoulder with her arm
she cried so hard whenever she heard of a
And Harry was killed at last?"
Yes. at Fredericksburgh. He was
woundod very badly there. Papa went
to him. ho died the same day, and papa
brought him home. Poor Harry."
" So thai is tbe ' Harry ' whose grave I
saw," thought the widow, as ahe laid her
hand tenderly on the child's head and
kissed her cheek.
"Now I must go," said the little mother.
" Papa will like this hat, I think ; and you
will have baby's bonnot by Saturday
" Yes, dear. But you must toll mo your
name before you go.
"Kulh Fredericks. Papa is the Reverend
Henry Fredericks. I wish you could come
and hear him preach. I think his sermons
are beautiful, and mamma used to think
Knlh went away, and the milliner stood
in the door looking after her, and Biuiling
at her sweet naivete.
The status of Mary Grant's affairs were
not changed when she wont back into the
little shop, but somehow her heart was
lighter, her spirit more hopeful. She
selected some tilk and lace and began
making a Normandy cap for baby Sally
humming a tune as she worked.
Her thoughts were busy with the lonely
family and iu sad history; with the young
soldier, the lorrowing wife.and the patient,
brave voucz housekeeper playing mother
so sweetly, and loving her falher with such
" Life is not all a sham, she said.
There are true hearts.noble and unselfish.
God is still with us in human love, and in
this beautiful world that Ho had created. '
The slanting rays of the sun full into her
room, a robin sang outside in the elm, a
pot of roses blossomed in her window, and
she knew that orocusca and violets were
awakening from their death-like gleep in
tne bosom oi tue earm.
Tbe old ladies caps' were not taken down
that night. Indeed, they had changed
their appearance and seemed to smile
benevolently; and in the early evening a
veritable old lady came in and bought one,
pitying a good price.
She expected company Decoration day.
she remarked, "and wanted to smart up a
littlo. It was a neat, tasteful head-dress,
and other old ladies, seeing it, came for
more. Ihe tide seemed to be setting with
a faint, yet perceptible motion, toward tbe
Alar j urant took courage.
" I will have an opening," she said, one
hriirht. electric Mav morn inc. " I will
make the pfltlieHt thing I can think of if
it takei my last cent to buy material. And
it will. I am su e of Unit. Never mind.
there ii still the fine washing left."
So Blie went out and bought silk nnd
lace and white chip bonnets and pale blue
and rose pink ribbons of Sarsnet & Co.
When she tot homo with ner purchases
sho had twenty-five cents in her purse,
Her rent was paid lor a quarter in advance
and she could live on eggs and musn, with
an occasional roast potato. So she was se
cure against homelessness and starvation
for a short time at least.
Her delicate lingers flow, and dainty
fabrics grew beneath them. She was full
of inspiration for her work, and in a short
time the little shop window was full of
fresh, artistic designs.
She smiled when she thought of her
past discouragement, and attributed all her
new courago to tho advent of Ruth, and
the makintr of Sally's Normandy cap,
In some way it " got out" in Allandale
that Mrs. Grant bad beautilul new styles.
Minnie Ferguson, the rich manufacturer's
daughter, heard Ibis rumor, and rode
thither in her carriage.
Tho sight of that carriage acted liko a
magic. As many as nan a dozen young
ladies who saw it, visited the shop the
very next day. I ho pretty spring bonnets
went oQ like hot cakes,
" They are unique," said Miss Minnie
and slraitrhtwav the word " unique " was
in the mouih of every one of her troop of
followers. The widow was seriously in
danrer of becoming: the fashion.
In the meantime Ruth dropped in to see
her whenever she came to town on errands
for her household. The child-like woman
and the womanly child grew to love each
other very soon with no common love.
The confidences grew longer between
them, nnd soon Mrs. Grant lelt as if she
had known tbe minister's family all her
life. Many were the visits she made to
Ofien on the bright May afternoons she
took a trifle of work and sat by the green
mound, now purpling all ovor with spring
" He shall be my soldier," she said to
herself. " On Decoration day I will come
here with the loveliest flowers 1 can linil,
in tbe early morning long beforo the town
She kept her word. At dawn slie stepped
... . l-i.. I t.. ,-..11
out into me rosy ngut, wuu uns&et juu
of roses and pansles, verbenas ana mign-
onnettes. Through tho silont streets she
hurried, meeting no one, thinking only of
tho love and grief throbbing in the conn
try's heart for her dead son.
The cemetery lay serene in tho glow of
the new day. rsirus were uutiag uoout
here and there among tho new graves, and
now and then a eusli of music quivered
through tho air. A shaft from the rising
sun shot athwart Harry's grave as the lady
She smiled as she saw it,
"It's a good omen," she said "a symbol
of the liirht in which Ihe spirit dwells."
Once bv tho crave, she sat down and
began weaving her roses into a wreath for
the young soldier. The pansies, already
bound in a dainty bouquet, she placed
uixm his breast.
Sittins there, entwining the white blos
soms, with their dewy leaves, sho mnr
mured a prayer tbe litany of Decoration
"God have mercy upon all mothers wbo
ween to-day : civo them the trao blossoms
of consolation, the lilies of peace, the roses
of triumphant faith. '
" Amen," said a deop, solemn voloe at
She turned quickly, blushing scarlet.and
saw a tall, grave man standing near. His
hands were full of flowers, and it was plain
that ho, too, bad come to decorate the
crave of the soldier boy.
The mau and woman looked Into each
other's faces, and then moved by the same
impulse, they clasped bands with a close,
"You are the lady wbo has been so good
to my little Ruth," said he,
" And you are Harry's father?" said
It was a strange introduction; but in
live minutcB conversation thore lu tne
fresh dawn, by Harry's peaceful grave,
brought them nearer togothor than days of
society intercourse would have done, it
touched tho weary, aching heart of the
falher very deeply to soo this sweet stran
ger bringing tlowors to his soldior boy
and the widow was inexpressibly cbeored
in return by tho sympathy and tenderness
to which slie hud to long been a stranger.
Mr. Fredericks told Mrs. Grant that bo
should bring Ruth and Sally to town later
to see tho coremonios. Thereupon she
invited them all to her house to dinner,
and the invitation was accepted.
The baby wore her now cap, and looked
for nil the world liko a meadow daisy.
Mary Grant fell in love with Sally at first
sight, and aftor nn hour's acqnalntance.the
little ono followed ber new friend round
as if she had known her all her life.
Ruth was in a state of delight so intense
that she could express It onlv by affection
ate looks nnd actions now.strok ing her
around her neck.
j This visit was tbe first of matiy. Under
ithe new inspiration of loving friendship,
the minister's sermons and the milliner's
bonnets prospered alike.
After a hard week's work, it was a deli
cious rest to walk to the little country
church and sit in tho pew with Ruth and
S illy, listoning to the gospel of faith aid
A trip in town, a stroll among books
and pictures, and nn early tea with his
new friend, made life for weeks to come
easier and sweeter to the minister.
And so it fell out that, by-and-by, they
concluded that it would Ik) wiser on the
whole lo make ono family.
There was a milliner needed at Hunt's
Corners, as well as a wife, mother and
housekeeper; aud Mary Grant undertook
with remarkable cheerfulness, this fourfold
relation. The machinery of the household
began running with great regularity and
precision from tho day that tho minister
married the widow. The new wife made
dainty bonnets and pretty trifles of lace;
a new bouskeeper ruled the kitchen; the
minister worked in his study, and Ruth
went to school.
" It was my children who brought us
together," said the minister, on next Dec
oration day, as the two stood among the
graves with their offerings of flowers.
les, little Sally'B lNormandy cap saved
me from despair, ami Harry s grave
brought us face to face."
Disinfectants and Deodorizers.
To fumigate and cleanse tbe uir of an
apartment, we know of no more simple
way man to heat a common iron shovel
quite hot, nnd pour vinegar slowly upon
it The steam arising from this procecs Is
pungent, and of a disinfectant character.
Open the windows at tbe samo time.
z. All chances ot infection will be
prevented and effluvia destroyed from
dead bodies by wrapping them in sheets
saturated with a solution of carbonate of
3. An effective and inexpensive de
odorizer is obtained by dissolving half a
drachm of nitrate of lead in a pint of
boiling wate" and two drachms of common
salt in a pail of water; the two solutions
are then mixed and the sediment allowed
to settle. A cloth dipped in the liquid
and hung up in the apartment is nil that is
required to purity the most tcetid atmos
phere. It is recommended for its cheap
ness, a pound of the materials costing
about twenty-five cents.
4. A naillul of water in a newly-painted
room will remove tbe sickening odor of
paint. Coffee pounded in a mortar and
rousted on an iron plate, sugar burned on
hot coals, and vinegar burned with myrrh
and sprinkled on the floor and furniture
of a sick room are excellent deodori
5. When the space to be disinfected is
largo, chloride of lime may be dissolved
in water and sprinkled when required, or
cloths dipped in a weak solution or it
may be hung up at intervals throughout
the apartment. In the disinfection uf
putrilying substances, water-closets, etc.,
if applied directly it destroys the nox
ious exhalations as they are formed.
b. Dissolve one pound ot green cop
peras, costing seven cents, in one quart
if water; sprinkle tne solution about, und
in a few days the smell will pass nway.
Hair. To prevent the hair from turn
ing gray and falling, keep the head cool
by using occasionally sage tea with a little
liorax added. With a small sponge apply
to every part of the head just before or at
the time ot dressing the hair.
How We Taut Company. Ten thou
sand human beings set forth together on
their tourney. Alter ten years one-third
nt least havo disappeared. At the middle
point ot tne common measure ot lite, but
half are still upon the road, faster und
faster, as the ranks grow thinner, they
that remain till now become weary und
lie down to toil no more. At three score
and ten a band of somo four hundred still
struggle on. At ninety these have been
reduced to a handful of thirty trembling
patriarchs. Year after year they fall in
diminishing numbers. Ono lingers, per
haps, a lonely marvel, till the century is
over. We look over again, and tne work
of death is finished.
Why Lace is so CoSTi.r. The finest
specimen of Brussels luce is fo costly ns
lo require the labor ot seven persons on
one piece, and each operative is employed
at distinct features ot the work, the
threail used is of exquisite fineness, which
is ppun in dark underground rooms, where
it is sufficiently moist to keep tho thread
from separating. It is so delicate as
scarcely to be seen, and tho room is so
arranged that all the light admitted shall
fall upon tho woik. It is such material
that rendors tho genuine Brussels laco so
costly. On a piece of alcnciennes not
two inches wide, from two to three hun
died bobbins are sometimes used; and for
a larger width as many as eight hundred
There is one social dishonor nlxnit which
no one thinks it worth while to say much
in reprobation, but which does moie harm
lhan any olhor known to us wo mean the
dishonor of repeating conversations, opin
ions, circumstances, not made under
promise ef secrecy, but which a high
sense of honor would treat ns confidential,
if haply a high sense of honor were the
rule. It is odd that one of tbe best things
a boy learns nt school is to eschew tule
boaring nnd keep faith with his compan
ions, while one of tbo most common
practioes of society is to belray Ihe trust
contained in talk, and repeat to all what
has been told in implied confidence to one.
This habit of repeating what we hoar is
as fatal to the best intercourse of minds as
to the finer feelings of society.
Clueb Remed fob Catarrh. The
new remedy for catarrh consists in crushed
cubeb berries smoked in A pipe, emitting
tbe smoke through tbe nose; after a few
trials this will be easy to do. If tho noso
Is stopped up so that it is almost impossi
ble to breathe, one pipeful will make the
bead as clear as a bell. It is the best
remedy in tho world for offensive breath,
and will make the most foul breath pure
and sweet. Sufferers from the horrid dis
ease, ulcerated catarrh, will find this rem
edy unoqualed, and a month's use will
euro tbe most obstinate case. Kitting the
uncrnshed berries is also good for sore
ihroat and all bronchial complaints. After
smoking, do not expose yourself to cold
air for at least fifteen minutes.
Hints for Avoiding Accidents While
Siiooiino. 1. Nover carry vour eun
under any circumstances with Iho ham
mers down on the cap. 2. Novor carry
it on the full cock, except when expecting
game to riso. 3. Never carry it with tho
barrel In aborizontalposition. 4. Noyerlet
it be pointed either toward voursolf or any
oiuor person, o. in going inroush a
fence always hold It boforo vou ns nearly
perpendicular as possible, with tho muzzle
a little above your head. 6. Never load
ono barrel with the other either on tho cap
or at full cock. 7. Nover take your gun
home loaded, except you immodiitcly
piace it unuei iocs and xey. s, nnd lastly
Always consider it an instrument that
may take away your own or the life of
your dearest friend at any time without a
roomeut s warning, ami do not handle it
as if there was no more harm to be appre
hended from it than from your walking
stick or umbrolla.
On a bright, pleasant summer morning,
a young man, with a silk mulller around
his throat, and a woe-begone look in his
pale face, plied the big knocker upon the
doctor's dwelling. A lady answered the
summons, and informed the applicant that
tbe doctor was in his garden at work. To
tbe garden the young man went, where,
be found the man of medicine engaged in
hoeing bis sweet corn.
Well, sir, an 1 what is tbe matter?
the doctor asked, when the applicant had
slated that ho had come for medical ad
vice and assistance.
Well, doctor, with a lugubrious face,
and a whinning, moaning tone, I feel
roorly ajl through. My head has spells
of aching; my Hppetile is poor ; my food
does not set well ; and I am Very weak.
Really, I need help.
Yes, I see. Let mo look at your tongue.
Ah! yes. Now your pulse.
The pulse was felt, and after due delib
eration, said tbe doctor :
Look you, young man, you do certainly
need help. Now, see; I must attend an
important case at ten o'clock, and I must
have this corn hoed before I go. So while
I am gone to mako up a prescription for
you, do you tako ray boo and go on with
my work here. You know how to use
Yes, sir. My father was a farmer; but
I haven't worked on a farm sinco he died.
Nor you haven't worked much any
where else, I take it, tho doctor threw in
No, sir; I am not obliged to.
Very well. I'll warrant you the work
hero won't hurt you, so go on with it until
I come back.
With that the doctor trudged off, nnd
the young man went at the work of hoe
ing. He hoed to the end of the row, and
there removed the light mulller from his
neck. Then be went at it aurain. Half
way down the second row be slopped nnd
looked up, but no doctor was in siirht. At
tho end of that row, as I lie absent one had
not yet appeared, ho pulled off his coat.
iho thud row be hoed more slowlv, stoo
ping several times before the end was
reached; hut he finished it und after a
good rest, atlacked tbe fourth row. There
was but one more row after this, and the
fancy seized him to have it done before
the old fellow got back. It would be u
surprise to him. The thought quickened
his pulses, and gave him renewed vuu.
He had iust completed the last hill of the
hist row, when the doctor c uno back.
Well, well, mv young friend, bow arc
yon feeling now?
Ihe patient really iad to consider, flo
had been looking to see what the physician
nan brought with him ot medicine; hut
ho had brought nothing. His hands were
empty. I he work basn t hurt yon, has
Oh, no, sir, his face flowing with the
I thought not. IJt tue feel of your
pnlse again. He held the young man's
wiist for a brief space, and then
It has workod to a charm. Now, air,
do you go home, and repeat this dose
twice a day, every morning and every
afternoon ; do it faithfully, and bo honest
with your diet, don't uso tobacco, and if
that does not work a cure, come and let
me know. My fee, sir, is ono dollar.
Ono dollar? gasped the astounded
That is all I charge when patients call
at my door.
But, sir.in mercy's name! what is it for?
Where is your prescription? What havo
I taken of yours?
My prescription, my dear young friend,
I gave you beforu I left you here with my
hoe; the medicine you have been .taking in
my place a health-giving portion which I
should havo enjoyed had I not given it up
And now, dear, I will toll you frankly,
you aro rusting out, literally tumbling to
pieces for want of exercise of both body
and mind. That is all, sir. You can fol
low my prescription nnd be cured, or you
can take your own way.
The young man paid tho dollar and went
his way. Not then could he bo cheerful ;
but afterwards, when be hail allowed rea
son fair play, and had come to provo the
life-saving and the new life-giving virtues
of tbe doctor's prescription, he came and
thanked him. hxcliawjc.
Conversational Proprieties. The
terms " genteel people' this, that, or the
oilier is " very genteel " are terms not to
be used, or very seldom. Substitute for
them such words as " highly accomplish
ed," " good taste," " gentlemanly," etc.
It is not well for a lady to say yes sir,'
and " no sir," to a gentleman acquaint
ance, or frequently to introduce the word
sir" at the end ot her sentences, unless
sho desires to be exceedingly reserved
towards the person with whom sho is
conversing. Such words as "I guess,'
1 calculate," and " I reckon are to oe
avoided as much as possible; and, when
relating a conversation, it is scarcely re
fined to use the expression " says he," or
" says she," or " you know." Interrupt
ing one wno is speaking, even luougu n.
bo an intimato friend, is graceless nnd un
becoming. Laughing at one s own story,
is a short way of spoiling it if it havo
any wit it will bu appreciated. Speaking
of any person wbo is at a dislanco within
sight, it is rune manners to pomi ui niui.
Forgetting names, or mistaking one name
lor another, often indicates ill-mannered
heedlessness thus, to say, Mr. What-d'ye-
call-him, or, You-know-who, Whats-her-
narue, or, Ilow-dye-call her. Another
most offensive practice, is that of taking a
person aside to whisper in a room where
there is company. lookmg ono anotner
in tho face in conversation is essenu.ii to
secure lile and interest. In speaking ot
otirself and unother person, whether he is
absent or present, propriety requires us to
mention ourselves last, in all cases and
under all circumstances ; thus we should
say, " ho and i," " iou anu i.
Cunning men, says Josh Billings, nil-
wuss git beat in tho long run, bcKauze
thoy are just az dull on one side uz they
are sharp on the other.
A beautiful custom prevails in many
parts of Enrope of planting a treo upon
tho birth of everv child. It saves the
wear and tear oi slippers.
Closets that aro damp aro dangerous
cnemios to heallh. If your closets are
damp and ongonder a mold whicn encasos
not ouly boots and shoes, but also other
articles of wearing apparel, obtain a half
peck of tinslackod lime and put in a shal
low dish iu the closet, and it will absorb
the dampness. When it becomes quite
damp it should be renewed-
KiM.K.iiioii Starch Polish. Tako of
whito wax one otinco. spermaceti two
imniiiia. tint! a (rood oinch of salt. Mix ami
melt them togotbor. and when cold it will
bo a hard, while cake, that will not mould
or sour even In hot woather. Put a piece
the sizo of a poa in tho hot starch that is
inlander! for evorv three or four shirts.
When ironing, go ovor it a socoud time
ntiic.klv. which increases the gloss or pol
ish, tho best kind of a polishing iron is
Ihe ono with a bulgo at both ends a Kina
that costs a dollar nt tho hardware store.
Irnn It wnll once, then dampen with a
nnt-rrilv clean, soft, white, damp cloth
then rub with tho polishing iron until it is
so glossy you can soe your faco in it. The
iron must not be too hot, or it will scorch ;
if it is a little too cool, the polish will be
Theio is reason in all things. Old Saw.
Thai's where you're wrong as usual. Old
Sawyer; did'st never try to argue with a
' nervous " woman ?
What's du lime o' day, ole 'oninn? said
a colored countryman to Auul Milly, try
ing to poke fun at the brass chain that
held her front door key around her neck.
Ixxik at do town clock, chile. Dat's built
for poor folks.
Emma Abbott writes to an eastern pa
per. " To this day I lovo the school girl
wbo gavo me half her apple one day when
t was hungry." We can see your half
applo, Emma, and go you a bushel better.
We still love the girl out of whoso grand
father's orchard we used to steal gallons
and pecks of apples when we weren't a bit
hungry. And now if you could just see
her baby oh, Emma. Burlington Hawk-
Is that nn Alderney cow?" the young
man from town asked old Mr. Thistlcpod,
out on the agency road. The old man is a
little near-sighted in his hearing, and ho
looked at the youth in amazement. "Wal,"
he replied, " she nin't so all-fired elderly.
only two years old last spring. What
might bo jour men ot nn old cow, young
man?" lint tbe young man spake not.
neither did lie smile, but he looked nway
off down the road with the yearning ex
pression of a man who has been drafted
but doesn't want to go. Umoki.yc.
A gentleman, wishing to obtain board
for his wifo and family in the country. was
hreuted to a neat looking farmhouse, kept
by an old farmer and his wife. A brief
inspection satisned mm tnat ino place
would suit him. " But now as to terms,"
he said. " Waal," drawled the farmer,
" you have six children, you say?'' " Yes
sir." The old man reflected a few mo
ments nnd then resumed. " Last year I
took children at half price Do you see
them p'ar trues and berry bushes? Waal,
this year I will charge full price for tho
young nns and throw in your who and
yourself for nothing."
Enough! Enough! A Frenchman.who
knew very little of our language, unfortu
nately got into a difficulty with a country
man, and light he must, nnd that too,
rough and tumble. But before he went nt
it, ho wanted to know what be should cry
if he found himself whipped. After being
informed that, when satisfied, all he would
havo to do would be to cry out " enough,"
at it they went; but poor monsieur, in his
difficulties, forgot tbe word, and finding
his eyes likely to be removed from their
sockets, ho began to cry out ; but instead
of saying what was told him. be began
bawling lustily, "Hurrah! Hurrah! Hur
rah!'' To his astonishment the country
man began pounding harder, when mon
sieur, finding there was no uso in hallo
ing, turned and went to work in such good
earnest that it was not long before the
countryman sang out in a stentorian voice.
"Enough! Enough!" " Say that again,"
said the Frcnchman.""Enough! Enough!"
cried the countryman. When the French
man in bis turn, exclaimed, " Hegar, dat
is tho vero word I vns trying to say long
Prince l'eter ol Oldenburg has iust bad
a somewhat exciting experience. He is at
tho bead of the Imperial Russian colleges
for girls and is very diligent in performing
his tlutics. He lately decided to see for
himself whether there wore any grounds
for the numerous complaints of the poor
food furnished at tho Suioling convent
where eight hundred girls aro educated.
Proceeding to the institution just before
the usual diuuer hour, he avoided the
main entrance, and walked straight toward
the kitchen. At its door ho met two
soldiers carrying a huge steaming caul
dron. " Halt!" lie called out. "put that
kettle down." The soldiers, of course,
obeyed. " Bring me a spoon,' added the
prince. Tbe spoon was at once produced,
but one of the soldiers ventured to oegin
a stammering remonstrance. " Hold your
tongue," cried tho prince ; " take off the
lid. I insist on tasting it." No further
objection was raised, and his highness
took a large spoonlul. ' lou can tins
soup," he exclaimed; "why, it is duty
water! "ll is, your tugnness, repucu
the soldier; " we have just been cleaning
out the laundry."
American Wit. The ready wit of
many a Yankee may be trusted to give a
Roland for nn Oliver to any foreigner wno
ventures on a sarcasm against his country.
An amusing illustration was recently
eiven in a trip to the Pacific. A Yankee
and an Englishman were fellows-travelers,
and had become quite sociable through the
forced companionship ot several days.
The Englishman evidently thought more
of the grand scenery nnd vast resources of
the country than oi tne culture anu goon
manners of the people, nor did an undue
moilesty restrain the freo utterances of his
The Yankee took it all in good part.
giving a sly thrust now and then at the
weak points ot moinerianu. as nicy
passed through the Rooky Mountains,
they saw that many of the grandest views
were disfigured by huge advertisements
on the sides of the cliff. The Englishman
pointed at them with intense disgust. 1 ho
Yankee, no doubt, sympathized with him.
but the opportunity was too good lo be
lost, and ho coolly retorted :
" I guess that is not so bad ns somo of
your people, who have tried to advertise
themselves on the planet Mars!" referring
to the names of Englishmen given to seas
and mountains discovered in the planot.
Tho Englishman laughed, aud conclud
ed that it was not necessary to make any
" Hey?" Up Woodward avenue a piece
is ono of thoso men who, even if he under
stands perfectly well an inquiry addressed
to bim, invariably replies: " ueyr- ami
the inquiry must bo submitted again. Tho
world has tens of thousands of these
" heys?" but until tho other day this Do
troiter was the worst of all. Along came
a stranger tho other evoning who might
and might not have known of this man's
eccentricity. Eutering the storo he re
" I want four pounds of sugar."
" Hoy?" replied tbe other.
" I said I wanted a sausagc-stnll'er,"
continued the man.
" What hey?"
"I asked if you had pickles in vinegar."
coolly remarked the stranger.
" I want a gallon of turpentine,"
slowly replied the stranger.
"Bless you! but I don't keep it!" sud
denly exclaimed the citizen.
" 1 didn't suppose you did."
" I said I'd fake some liver pills in place
No doubt the dealer had heard every
singlo word of tbo entire conversation,
and he didn't like it very woll either, but
habit prevailed and again ho callod out :
" Calico! calioo!" shoutod the strangor.
" I've asked you a dozen limes over if you
bad any good, eight-cent calico!"
" No, sir no, Bir no, sir!" was the
" Hoy?" called the stranger, his hand
to his ear.
Tbe citizen looked around for tho four
pound weight, but when he found it there
I was nothing to throw it nt.-Detroit Free