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A Novel Medical Examination.
The following burlesque application is almost worthy of Artemus Ward. It is supposed to be written by a "fat, genial-natured looking man with a breath that smelled a good deal like a political primary," and constitutes the test of membership in the "Sos ■iety of Congenial Brethering." We give the questions verbatim: Wats your name? When, where and why wete you born, as near as you can kalkerlate? Wats yuer ocyoopashun, or air you a member of Corey's Army? Air you single or bald-headed? Wats yer mesher or do you drink right out of the bottle? Wats yer surkliashun? Wat part of the town and wat re sorts do you surkliate in? Wat race do you belong 2, or don't you keep a trotter? Ever been yaxinated ? If so, who delt the cards? Ever delt or Meddled with intoxi catin Lickers? Are you henpecked or bein grownd down with any other kind of manop erly kaklated 2 shorten yer life? Wat is yer habits as regard to Sick erettes, 1 eyed spectercles, mustach growers, musk, hair ile & seeb? How much korn beef and kabbage, mins pie, welch Rabit, limburger cheese, baled hay, bordin house Hash gravie & Scrap irun can you devour just before goin 2 bed? Is your teeth home grone or arty fishel? Tung ever feel like a door mat? Eny Buzzin in your hed or sinkin •pels? Ever hev gloomy 4bodins. ackum panied by spots before the ize sech as 2-spots, 5-spots or 9-spots? If so, how much was there on the Bord? Do you keep a mewl or any other explosive on yer premersis? Ever git ketched in a foldin bed, fall down thru a stove pipe Hoal, tumble head first into a barril of Pre pared mustard, set down on an en raijed hornet, slide out of yer pocket at prair meetin, slip up on a benaner peel while tryin to make an impreshun on yer lady luv acrost the street, or meet any other axidents kalkylated to shatter your constatooshun? „ Air you adikted 2 chawing tobacker or your walkin Stick or any other vilernous pracktises? Wats yer family record, if any? Is yer nose blew, purple, crushed strawberry, or plane Old Glory (for identyficashun)? Air you aware we don't pay klames on Umbrellas & Hats found on the Brink of niagry fawls?—Grove Cole in the Insurance Post. Mothers Praise It. Mothers everywhere praise One Min ute Cough Cure fortne sufferings it has relieved and the lives of their little ones it has saved. A certain cure for coughs, oroup and whooping cough. A. L. Spafford, Postmaster, of Chester, Mich., aays: "Our little girl was unconscious from strangulation during a sudden and terrible attack of croup. One Minute Cough Cure quickly relieved and cured her and I cannot praise it too highly." One Minute Cough Cure relieves coughs, makes breathing easy, cuts out phlegm, draws out inflammation, and removes every cause of a cough and strain on lungs. Sold by B. 8. Beall. Esq. J. S. Lipsey was here preserv ing the peace and dignity of Holmes last Saturday. A Runaway Bicycle Terminated with an ugly cut on the leg of J. B. Orner, Franklin Grove. 111. It developed a stubborn ulcer unyielding to doctors and remedies for four years. Then Bucklen's Arnica Salve cured. It's just as good for Burns, Scalds, Skin Eruptions and Piles. 25c. at B. S. Beall's Drug Stors. Justice J. W. Whittington left here on Monday morning's train for West, and returned Tuesday. Prof. John Belford, of Acona, bars on professional business Sat urday. was Doesn't Respect Old Age. It's shameful when youth fails to show proper respect for old age. but just the oontrary in the case of Dr. King's New Life Pills. They out off maladies, no matter how eeverf and irrespective of old age. Dyspepsia, Jaundice, Fever, Conatipation all yield to this perfect PilL 26c, at B. S. Beall's Drug Store. A Good Complexion. "Sparkling eyes and rosy cheeks re stored by Ming DsWitt's Little Early Risers," so writes 8. P. Moore, of Nac effdoehes, Tex. A certain cure for MIHomkm, cnostipation, etc. Small pUl—eaey to take—easy to act. Sold by B. 8. Beall. Thousands Cored. DsWitt's Witch Haiel Salve 'has eared thousand! of cases of Piles. "I beaght a box of DsWitt's Witch Haiel Salve on tbs rsooesmendation of our druggist." so writes C. H. LaCroix, of ZavaUa, Tex., "and used it fur a etub of Piles, It cured me plgga aeatly." Sold by B. 8. Beall. i A Splendid Entertainment. j On Hallowe'en the "Hose Buds' gave a "spook party" at the residence of Mrs. I. Levy, and it was one of the most unique and enjoyable affairs ever given in Lexington. Mrs. Hulda Wolfe, of New York, was the guest of honor. The house was tastefully and appropriately decorated, and every one entered heartily into the fun-making. There were grinning Jack-o-lanterns on each gate post and in most of the rooms. At an early hour the house and yard were crowded with sheeted ghosts, who soon began to wander over the nearby roads and into the old cemetery. There was a Gipsy fortune teller in a tent in the yard, who astonished the merry spooks with some fearful and wonderful predictions. A handsome young spook and a fair spookess confessed their love and were married upon the spot by a spook minister. During the cere mony Mrs. McQuillan very appro priately played a funeral march. After this happy event all the spooks disappeared as if by magic and a jolly crowd of boys and girls filled the house. Amid much merri ment lots were drawn to decide who was to take each young lady to sup per and afterwards escort her home. The table was tastefully decorated with popcorn, pumpkins, autumn leaves and fruit of all kinds. Each guest received a souvenir in the shape of a tiny skeleton. Attached to these with white ribbon were peanut shells containing each one's fortune. After lunch had been served the guests amused themselves trying to get apples out of a tub with their teeth. Miss Annette Levy secured a thimble as a sign of industry, Mr. Steve Burwell secured a dime as a sign of wealth, and Mr.' Eugene Pow ers secured a ring as a sign of mar riage. Mr. Garrett Herbert drew the final prize, a figure of the devil, pitch fork in hand. The evening was con cluded with singing and dancing, which were kept up until the wee sma' hours. Among those present were: Mrs. I. Levy, Mrs. G. T. McQuillan, Mrs. Hulda Wolfe, of New York, Mr. and Mrs. W. L. Kinney, Mr. and Mrs. Sam Herrman; Misses Mayme Wyatt, Ethel Baker, Daisy Herrman, Mary Dyer, Nell Durden, Annette Levy, Nell Cunningham, Mattie McCloud; Messrs. Ike Pickens, Godfrey Shakelford, James Stansbury, Wesley Morris, Ben Hooker, Earl Hook, Edwin Holcomb, Garrett Herbert, Duncan McCloud, Eugene Powers, Lee Moses, Sigmond Hyman and Steve Burwell. Some people neglect their liver, think, ing that it will probably care for itself, and so it will, with a little assistance now and then. If it doesn't get it how ever, there is going to be trouble, and if neglected, the trouble may not only be of a very aggravated type, but of several years duration, and possibly for life. Keep a box of Liver-Acs conven ient at all times. Then with the first appearance of torpid liver, take them according to directions, thereby keep ing your system in the proper condi tion. They are also especially adapted to the cure of headaches, constipation, vertigo, loss of appetite, nausea, and in fact any ills that arise from a disor dered liver or malarial conditions. They do not cure everything, but are indis pensable in the ailments above men tioned. You can procure them from your druggist for 25c, or write Finlay. Dicks A Co. L't'd, New Orleans, La. J. W. Meek, of Black Hawk, while here on business Monday made our office an appreciated call. Disastrous Wrecks. Carelessness is responsible for many a railway wreck and the same causes are making human wrecks of'Sufferers from Throat and Lung troubles. But since the advent of Dr. King'sNew Discovery for Consumption, Coughs and Colds, even the worst cases can be cured, and hopeless resignation is no longer neces sary. Mrs. Lois Cragg of Dorchester, Mass., is one of many whose life was saved by Dr. King's New Discovery. This great remedy is guaranteed for all Throat and Lung diseases by B. S. Beall, Druggist. Price 50c and $1.00. Trial bottles free. J. W. Meriwether, during his visit here Monday, made The Advertiser a pleasant call. State of Ohio, City of Toledo, j Lucas County. | "• Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he la K artner or theflrm or F, J. Cheney A Co.,, utlneu In the City of Toledo, Counly State aforesaid, and that aald Arm will pa. .>>□ sum of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every oase of Catarrh that oannot be onred by the use of Htll'a Catarrh Cure. frank j. chkney. Sworn to before me and subscribed In mv presence, this Sth day of December, A. D. 18DS. (SEAL) A. W. GLEASON, „ Notary Public. Hall t Catarrh Cure Is taken Internally, and acta dlreotly on the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. Send for teatlmon als free. F. J. CHENEY A CO.,Toledo, 0. Sold by all Druggists, 79c, Take Hall's Family Pills for senior ,doln .1 an conatlgation. Joy and happineaa oftumes In mat ban hearts are brought to dwell Beoauae "TBETHINA'8" brought th« bloom To bsby'a obeeka and made it well. Anodynes only aoothe and lull to sleep. "TRETHINA" curea the ohlld. Regulates the. bowels and saves the parents many slseplesa nights of care and anxiety. Vote for T. J. J ordan For Circuit Clerk HE IS YOUR FRIEND. j i His Motto is still as it always was: LIVE an i LET LIVE. t# T. J. JORDAN. Yoons truly, a The Hallowe'en corn frolic given at their home on the 31st by Master John and Miss Ruth Rhyne was quite a successful event. When all was ready the young people repaired to the yard where huge bonfires had been built among the trees. Now the genuine fun began, some of the merrymakers roasting corn and pea nuts, while others told stories, etc. When the fires begun to die down the party repaired to the house where the remainder of the evening was spent in familiar games and Hallowe'en tricks, winding up with supper in the dining room. All too soon the even ing came to an end and the young people wended their way home, pro nouncing it a most enjoyable affair. THE FOUNDATION OF HEALTH. Theie is no orgau of tlie human system tliat is the result of more illness, that lays the cause for more fatal diseases than the kidneys. When they are iuaetive the whole system becomes impregnated witli poisonous blood which undermines the very foundation of health. GAY U-BA should be used when .the slightest disorder appears. Its use will not only save time, expense, and worry, but great suffering. Sold by B. S. Beall. Mr. Paul Stein, one of the promi nent candidates for Circuit Clerk, was at home last Saturday. Paul has many friends in our county and will doubtless receive a big vote. SHOULD BE A WARNING. It is a lamentable sight to see a man or woman who has not yet reached the prime of life within the throes of that dreadful complaint— consumption, and it certainly should be a warning to those who are in good liea th not to trifle with coughs and colds when a reliable article like DR. CLASSED COUGH SYRUP may be obtained at so small a cost. Sold by P. S. Beall. Between January and April 15th of this year 200 human beings met death at the hands of their fellow man in Mississippi, as reported in the papers. This is the bloodiest record in our state's history. Nine-tenths of the killings were confined to negroes killing each other. This matter was forcibly presented to the Y'azoo grand jury last week by Judge Miller. Not a Sick Day Since. '•I was taken severely sick with kid ney trouble. I tried all sorts of medi cines, none of which relieved me. One day I saw an ad. of your Electric Bit ters and determined to try that. After taking a few doses I felt relieved, and soon thereafter was entirely cured, and have not seen a sick day since. Neigh bors of mine have been cured of Rheu matism, Neuralgia, Liver and Kidney troubles and General Debility." This is what B. F. Bass, of Fremont, N. C. ( writes. Only 50c, at B. 8. Beall, Drug gist. Constipation. Health is absolutely impossible, if constipation be present. Many serious cases of liver and kidney complaint have sprung from neglected constipation. Such a deplorable condition is unneces- sary. There is a cure for it. Herbine will speedily remedy matters. C. A. Lindsay, P. M., Bronson, Fla., writes, Feb. 12,1902: "Having tried Herbine, I find it a fine medicine for oonstipa- tionl" 50c bottle. 8old by B. S. Beall. ---— I J. H. Stigler's barn and stables were burned -to the ground Tuesday night at 10 o'clock. The barn con tained the winter's supply of forage, which was also destroyed. Fortu nately the horse and cows were got ten away from the burning building and saved. Barn, stables and feed stuff foot up a loss of $600, with an insurance in John L. Dyson's agencies of $200. The fire is believed to have been of incendiary origin. The Exact Thing Rrquired for Constipation. "As a certain purgative and stomach purifier Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver Tablete seem to be (he exact thing required, strong enough for the most robust, yet mild enough aod safe for children and without that terrible grip ing eo common to post purgatives, say R. S. Webster 4b Co., Udora, Onta rio, Canada. For sale by Swinney ft Stigler. Neuralgia Pains, Rheumatism, lumbago and sciatic pains yield to the penetrating influence of Ballard's Snow Liniment. It penetrates to the nerves and bone and being ab sorbed into the blood, its healing prop erties are conveyed to every part of the body, and effect some wonderful cures. 25c, 50c, $1.00. Sold by B. S. Beall. J. W. Lockhart, Durant's postmas ter, visited our town Saturday. Best Liniment on Earth. Henry D. Baldwin, Supt. City Water Works, Shullsburg, Wis., writes: "I have tried many kinds of liniment, but I have never received much benefit until I used Ballard's Snow Liniment for rheumatism and paius. I think ii the best liniment on earth." 25c, 50c, $1.00. Sold by B. S. Beall. Dan Stephenson made our office an appreciatedsvisit last Saturday. Herb W. Edwards Injured. Herb W. Edwards, of Des Moines, Iowa, got a fall on an icy walk last win ter, spraining his wrist and bruising his knees. were so sore and stiff I was afraid I would have to stay in bed, but 1 rubbed them well with Chamberlain's Pain Balm and after a few applications all soreness had disappeared, by Swinney & Stigler. The next day," he says, "they For sale DIED—Gen. L. Malone, of Broz ville, at Tchula early Thursday morn ing of last week, and was buried in Hebron churchyard the same evening. Mr. Malone was ill but a few days when his physicians advised him to visit Yazoo City, that his case re quired a surgical operation which they were unwilling to undertake. On reaching Tchnla it was seen that he could go no further, and was taken off the train and died the next morning. Mr. Malone was a good Confederate soldier and belonged to the Holmes County Camp of U. C. V. He was a good neighbor and citizen and did his duty as he saw and under stood it. He leaves a widow to mourn over his demise. May his rest be peaceful. Next Tuesday will decide whether the impulsive Roosevelt will continue to keep the people of the United States, as well as the governments of all other countries guessing another four years, or whether Judge Parker, the cool and learned jurist, will be entrusted with the reigns of govern ment and conduct it on constitutional and economic lmef. Happily for the people of the South, they are now in a condition to pursue the even tenor of their way and enjoy life, if only the boll weevils will stay out of the country, regardless of who is elected. All we need is a united people in the Smth, a people who will not sell their birthright for office, and continue to regard principle above price. Every one should turn out next Tuesday and vote for Parker and Davis. Messrs. Swinney & Stigler had a visit from a frightened horse about church time last Sunday. The horse was saddled and tied, bnt becoming excited at a /lying piece of paper containing the Anglo-Russian em broglio, he broke loose from his bridle and ran in and through the drag store into''the back room, where he was stopped anil again bridled and led out of the back door. The most remarkable thing in his run through the store was that it has a large, fine show case in the middle of the floor, and we doubt the possibility of lead ing a horse around it without striking it, and yet he made it without break ing a thing, at a run. J. E. Cunninghan, ex-Deputy Chan cery Clerk and the present able ac countant of the large faonae of Lewia Hyman & Co., of Greenwood, was elected assistant cashier of the Bank of Lexington. Mr. Cunningham has been fnll np to all the requirements made upon him in his various business pursuits, and will All this new position with credit to bimaelf and with satis faction to the bank's stockholders. Mrs. T. W. Smith returned Satur day from Winona, where she visited her daoghter, Mrs. Clara Smith Doty. | Bro. Tucker and his people at Lex ington know how to do things. At the quarterly meeting the pastor's salary was in excess. The collec tions will be running over, fifteen members having been added to the church during the quarter. Lexing ton promises to be the equal of any charge in the conference in the near future, properly cultivated. We do not believe there is a better official board in the conference. Their monthly meetings are well attended, and are made occasions of interest. Bro. Tucker says the water over there is good enough for him.—Durant District Reporter. The Chicago Tribune states that in thirty railroad accidents which fol lowed each other in quick succession, 354 persons were killed and over 700 were wounded. Such a number of accidents do not occur on railroads in other countries where govern ments look more closely into such matters and require more careful handling of trains. The British government brought the Russians and their Baltic fleet to a halt pending an investigation of its shooting into the fleet of English fishing boats in the North Sea. The damages and punishment of the Rus sian officers, if found guilty, will be determined by arbitration. Hon. E. F. Noel, of Lexington, one of the most prominent lawyers and men of the state, was a distinguished visitor to Grenada this week, where he was most cordially greeted by his many friends.—Grenada Sentinel. The common expression on meeting people recently was, isn't the dust terrible? We had occasion to use it on an old friend a few days since. He made the following reply: Yes, and every short-lipped negro that comes to town now has his teeth covered with mud. THAT MOST EXCELLENT, PRAC TICAL, PROGRESSIVE INSTITU TION, HARRIS' BUSINESS COL LEGE, Jackson, Miss., is now in a position to give a FIRST-CLASS busi ness course without the cost of tui tion. They can take only a limited number. Write them AT ONCE, Indies always command. Mr. and Mis. J. Hughes Smith and Misses Bettie Stanfield and Mildred Smith returned from the Wdrld's Fair Saturday. Misses Bettie and Mildred accompanied Mr. and Mrs. Smith on their bridal tour to St. Louis, after one of the most beauti ful and largest attended nuptial cere monies celebrated here in years. Crawford Reid, our obliging office deputy sheriff, returned from Silver City last Thursday and reports his brother Hugh in a fair way to re cover from his illness. Our people will be glad to know that J. A. Cooper will soon have a corn mill in operation south of the creek. J. E. Johnson, one of our most ex perienced house painters and grain era, made our office a call Friday and secured a year's future visits of Tbs Advertiser. Dr. G.C. Phillips, accompanied by B. S. Beall, Jr., returned Wednesday from Memphis, where he had gone to consult with Dr. Wm. B. Rodgers, regarding B. S. Beall, Jr., who had to leave Lebanon, Tenn., college on acoount of bid health. ~ F. A. Mullin, of Acona, waa here on business Monday. Last week Mr. Mnllin purchased a lot, on which there is a cabin, from W. B. Whits, north of the latter's residence. Mrs. A. B. Watson, accompanied by her son Harry and daughter, Miss Nettie, returned from tue World's Fair last Friday. The Mieses Wilson returned Satur day from their six week's stay in New York City, whera they were the recipients of many courtesies and elegant receptions, which southern Hon. S. N. Sample, of Ebenezer, spent Sunday evening and Monday here with friends, leaving on Monday evening's train for Yazoo City. When you want a pleasant physic try Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver Tab lets. They are easy to take and produce no griping or other unpleasant effect. Sold by Swinney 4: Stigler. C. H. McLellan was over from Durant Sunday. We are now gelling in our eighth car of furniture, and wo Lave every thing in the furniture Hue. Call to eee us. O. G. Calhoun Furniture Co. Have you seen Urn beautiful dress ing tables at the 0. G. Calhoun Furniture C Vs Sion ? Louis Vandiver, of Free Run, and a member at the Board of Supervisors of Yazoo, accompanied by Bill Henry of the same neighborhood, were here Monday on a trade for a swamp plan tation. Watch the show windows at the 0. G. Calhoun Furniture Co's Em porium. Cards are out for the marriage of Miss Sallie Burwell Tackett, of Rich land, and Mr. Eugene Doty, of Good man. The marriage ceremory will be performed in the Methodist church of Richland on Wednesday, Nov. 16. See the new automatic trunks at O. G. Calhoun Furniture Go's store. They are wonders. C. Hunoldstein, of Howard, trans acted business here Tuesday. Just received one solid car load of chairs. O. G. Calhoun Furniture Co. At a meeting of the Town Council Tuesday Parham Williams and W. L. Jordan were elected Trustees of the Lexington district schools; a good selection that will redound to the good of the schools. It is worth a long trip to call on O. G. Calhoun Furniture Cc. and see the largest stock of Beautiful Furniture ever brought to Missis, aippi. A forty-eight hour's rain, begin ning Tuesday night, effectually set tled the dust. Ponds, however, are still dry. Capt. James S. Butler wired his mother here that the ship on which he sails for Manila, leL San Fran cisco at 12 o'clock yesterday. The message came by Ya/.oo City and reached here in less than two hours from the time it mounted the wire. Wardrobes, with French plate bevel glass doors, the finest ever brought to Holmes counly; cheap ones too, at 0- G. Calhoun Furni ture Co. County Superintendent W. H. Smith has purchased of J. W. Lockhart his 80-acre place within the corporate limits of Durant. It will be divided into lots and placed on the market shortly. Citation Notice. State of Mississippi, Holmes County: No. 98S. Austin Lester 1 TS. V Young Redmond. J To Young Redmond, whose postoffloc and place of reeldenoe Is Nashville, Tcnn. You are hereby commanded to appear before the chan cery court of Holmes county, In the slate of Mississippi, at term ot said court to bo held on the 4th Monday In November A. D. 1901, at the court house, In the town ot Lexington, county and state aforesaid, ou the flyst duy of said term, then and there to plead,answerordemur to bill of oomplalnt of Austin Leater, to whloh yoa are the defendant. Witness my signature, thlB the 2d day of November, 1904. Parham WUllums, Chancery Clerk. i r t " M Lr Sf CARHARTT OVERALLS, Watt McCain, Sole Agent. * ni > >• r K 0 0 us < ►j < m £ HE CAME BACK .IN TWO YEARS FOR.. WALK OVER SHOES. ■■ -o— A man actually wore a pair of WALK OYER SHOES two years aad then came back for an other pair. We alwayskeep them to sell. MATT McCAIN. What has become of the laundry? J. F. Abies died at Mathena Mon day night and was buried the next day at the burial grounds of that place. WILL YIELD. Aches, pains or uiusoular inflam mation in any part of the body will yield to the great penetralia power of DR. CLASSES LINIMENT. Sold by B. S. Beall. A. C. Rogers and son, A. B. Rog ers, of Ebenezer, while here on busi ness Saturday, called on the Adver tiser. Citation Notice. Stats of Mississippi, Holmes County: To L. A. Kelly, Leon Kelly, Jolin Kelly, Mu gle and Julian Kelly, their postotttoe address Indue Wetumka, Indian Territory. You are commanded to appear before tha Chancery Court of the Couniy or Holmes, In aaldalats, on me Fourth Monday of November, A. D. 1904, to defend the suit in aald court or Martha Waugh and others, wherein yeu art defend ants. This tbe 1st day of Novemler, A. I). 1004. Parham WllUems, Chancery Clerk. Notice to Creditors. j No.97:.'. Estate of Joseph Schwolkert, by W. * J. Schweikert, Administrator. In the Chan cery Court of Holmee County, Mita: Wterenr, letters of admlnletratlon were granted the undersigned on the Sttth day of Oc tober, UK) I, as administrator of the eatataof Joseph rcliwolkeri. deceased. Now, ell per sona having any claim against said estate, will take nolle > that said claims must be probated and registered In the Chancery Clerk's office of Holmes counly, Mlsi., wlihln one year, or they will be forever barred. W. J. Schwolkert, Administrator. Sheriff's Sale. The State or Mississippi, Holmes County. R. and B. Sonthcimer vs. W. B. Brook*. Ur virtue of an execution which Issued from (he office of Jno. H. McBee, Circuit Clerk of the County of Holmes, and In favor of it. sad B. Sonthelmer and against W. B. Brooks for the sum of sixty-four dollars and thirty-two cents besides the Interest thereon sad oost of suit, I have this day levied upon the following deecrlncd lands belonging lo the aald defend ant, in tbe County of Holmes and State ot Mis sissippi, to-wlt: N e 1-4 n w 1-4 • 12,tl4, rS e, all or which I will offer for sale at the south door of the court house in the Town ot Lexing ton; Holmee County, Mlse., on Monday, ths&tk day of December, A. D. 1904, to satiety said execution and ulleoeta. Sale within legal hours. This. 3d day of November, A. D. 1904. W. W. WILBUKN, Sheriff.