Iron County register. [volume], November 29, 1894, Image 3

About Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965

Image provided by: State Historical Society of Missouri; Columbia, MO

                
f
legist
IRONTON,
MISSOUBL
VICTIM OF A CRUEL HOAX
-"Moth Exterminator" Pal-ni -
.wJ lrCT away the stamp of hi.
' ? 7?LaS.he ascended the stem of the
North State street residence, and as h
touched the bell adjnsted his neckUe
SarTof hift PP851116. use it was
part of his business. He was selling a
new cosmetic euing a
-?W WCU hetol the precaution
1? l,e p0rtfl3 "P" beheld a
female face. It was stern and austere
for it was attached to a woman of some
terhood. She wore glasses and gave
the impression that her features as well
-as her intellect had been sharpened by
"Zi WWlth Children in the school
room. Her corrugated face made even
IS th.6 cosmetic vender wrig
gle with apprehension. But it was too
late to retreat.
''00d day. miss," he said politely,
removing his hat and bowing low, "is
.your mother in?"
The corners of that grim mouth be-
wm? d'oP- "No-sir' she s -
lie saw his advantage and replied:
Jhy, certainly, you'll do, miss,
adding under his breath, "in a
pinch."
But he got inside and as he deposited
nis hat within easy reach he asked: "I
called to inquire, miss, if you needed
any cosmetic."
She was sitting primly on the edge
of a chair across the room waiting for
him to make known his business,"and
as those words smote her ears that
coffee-colored face turned a shade
lighter.
"What made you ask 'such a question
as that?" she asked sharply.
"Why, I'm a little near-sighted
that is, I'm selling cosmetic," he stam
mered. "Well, then, I must inform you that
I do not need any. Was that all?''
But he wasn't going to be bluffed.
"May I ask in parting if you ever
use. any," he asked as he reached for
his hat.
"No, sir, I don't."
"Well, I don't know only those
Ilamilton girls across the street told
me I might call here, but they didn't
think I could sell you any."
She pricked up her ears.
"Did they buy any?"
"Yes, I sold each of them three bot
tles. I know, miss, that you may not
need any, but this cosmetic of mine is
warranted to remove all skin blem
ishes, freckles, eruptions, and give a
beautiful, healthy color to the skin.
Not only this, but it will render the
skin soft and smooth just like a seal
skin, ma'am."
"Did you tell them Hamilton girl?
that?"
"Why, certainly, ma'am."
"That it would make their skins as
soft as silk just like a sealskin?"
"I did."
"Then I don't want to talk to you.
A man who can lie like that an't safe.
Why, sir, don't you know that if them
Hamilton girls got faces like sealskins
there'd b moths in thpm TwfrT- twr
- hours?"
"I know it, my dear young lady, but
that was none of my business."
She softened a bit and talked about
the use of cosmetics as though it was
a sin. Finally she decided to try it
once, and boucht a bottle. She won Id
-fri vv Ti i m ninety Pflnts. and not a. ront
uiur-s 11c hm Bailing iii lur vue uoi-
lar, and as it cost six cents he avowed
he couldn't afford it, but, rather than
miss a sale he took the ninety cents.
He was in no enviable mood as he
turned to wish her good morning, and
as he was leaving he reached into his
pocket, and pulled out a little box.
Handing it to her he said:
"I almost forgot, miss, that this goes
with your bottle." She took it, and a
moment afterward he was gone.
As she stood in the doorway unwrap
ping the little package in a half
mystified manner the agent was peep
ing out from behind a tree. The next
moment the street echoed with a wild,
-demoniac yelh
The spinster had unrolled a box of
moth exterminator. Chicago Times.
THE TRAINING OF BABY.
Tr . n : j t
fome Important Rales to Be Learned by
the Inexperienced Mother.
One of the most important is that
which demands perfect quiet for baby
during the first months of existence.
Babies are fussed over, talked to, and
handled into a state which is sure to
leave the nerves of the child in a thor
oughly unwrought condition.
The less notice outside of practical
needs given the tiny one during the
first year of its sojourn here below the
better. Allow the little frame to be
come accustomed to the strain upon it
so necessary when making the ac
quaintance of this restless, rioting
world of ours.
It is wise to continue this wholesome
neglect through childhood. Very many
mothers imagine that a child is ren
dered shy if it is not pushed ahead a
-bit each day while in the nursery.
Baby is compeled to make friends
with every stanger that appears. It is
7 kissed when it wants to be let alone.
If it has a cunning trick it is coaxed
and teased into exhibiting it.
Asxbaby grows older the same meth-
-ods are pursued. The. poor child is
. marshaled into the dining-room to be
put through its paces. Play is inter-
- rnpted, the little one fretted into a
state of nervousness that brings too of-
ten a punishment that is undeserved.
When your smiling friend asks, in
dulcet tones, to see baby, don't hesi-
. tate to say no. The chances are that
your visitor will mentally thank her
" lucky stars that she has been spared an
r infliction. Chicago Times.
The Proper Sequence.
"Is it still the custom in this country
to reach for your gun to back it up after
you have called a man a liar?" asked
tiie tourist.
"It air not, stranger," replied the
eariy seiner, nuu n ucicr u.
las allers ben the custom in the best
.society of Yaller Dog to reach fur the
.gan fust." Indianapolis Journal.
yueered Himself.
Wool Chappie doesn't go to see Miss
Titz any more.
Van Pelt Why not?
Wool One night when his paresis
'was pretty bad he asked her which
-whs the older, she or her mother. N.
ry. -.Wacld.
fCoFTKJGC ISM
CHAPTER XIV. Cowisted.
The director appears to have been a
pragmatic Englishman, without the
tact of prudence. There was, at the
time, a million dollars in specie on
temporary deposit in the St. Mary's
bank, being the two payments made
by the government for a large contract
for copper gun-barrels. This money
should never have reached St. Mary's
in coin. But there had been a loud
outcry from different parts of the coun
try that all the profits of the company
went to England, and the disaffected
men of "The Junta" had reechoed it
bitterly. This director, therefore,
whose name was Matlock, had advised
the company to use the money at St.
Mary's in paying off the indebtedness
on the improvement scheme. He ap
peared to think it would have a good
effect. On the night after th strike
three of the new houses 'built bv the
company were burned. Tl,- striking
workmen were charged wifJ-i tens in
cendiarism, but denied it. Tha next
day there were three or four thousand
men out of work in the town and a
very angry feeling.
Director Matlock injudiciously ex
pressed an opinion about the origin of
the fire which made the better class of
striking workmen indignant, and thej
sent a delegation to the office of the
works to get a statement from him di
rectly, and they encountered at the
door of the oflice six men, armed with
clubs and pistols, who ordered them
away. An altercation ensued. Two
of the delegation were knocked down
and one had his skull fractured. The
remainder of the men went back for
reinforcements and in an hour there
was a mob of five hundred men before
the office. They demanded that the
perpetrators of the outrage should be
handed over or they would enter the
building hy force and take them. Mat
lock refused to give them up. The
mob then broke into the office, seized
the men and took them into the street,
where they were beaten to death. The
director then sent for the sheriff at
Paducah and telegraphed to the gov
ernor that the English company's
property was in danger and he de
manded the protection of the state.
At this juncture a large number of
the remaining workmen who had
taken no part in the strike protested
against the action of the director and
went out with the others.
The whole town was now in a fer
ment of excitement, and that night
Mr. Matlock began to take measures
to have his gold "transferred.
The next day an event occurred
which is unprecedented in the history
of strikes. In order to understand it
in its extraordinary details, it is neces
sary to explain the topography of St.
Mary's.
The town is built on the first and
second of the natural terraces and cov
ers in a scattered way an area of per
haps three square miles. To the south
west and overlooking the town is
what looks like a portion of a third
and larger terrace, but which is the
level of a long stretch of tableland
that extends south and west with a
steady fall for fifteen or twenty miles.
It is a poor and sparsely inhabited
country covered with scrub oak and
gum trees and answers in many re
spects to the southwestern land of
Kentucky which is still called the
"Barrens." There are few roads and
these are very bad. All local travel
skirting this region follows the
Clark river on the line of the Paducah
HENDRICKS SAT TJP ALL OXE XIOHT
BEADING THE PAPERS.
railway. It is not at all inaccessible
from St. Mary's. It is simply uninvit
ing. About a mile out there is an old
house standing half hidden in the gum
trees and brush near the one road. It
was built ten years before by a man
who manufactured potash and tannin
from the oak stumps and is said to
have done quite a business there in a
drudging way. About six weeks be
fore the troubles broke out at St.
Mary's the place was hired from an old
negro into whose possession it had
fallen by a man who gave out that he
was going to fit it up for the manufac
ture of emery paper, a great deal of
which was used at St. Mary's and ma
terial for which had been found in a
crude state somewhere in the neigh
borhood. He had been receiving his
stock of machinery and implements
over the Paducah road.
On the morning to which reference
has been made, St. Mary's was in a
very demoralized condition. The news
had gone out over the country and
hundreds of strangers had poured in
across the Ohio' and from Louisville
and Cairo. It was expected by every
body that a collision would take place
between the workmen and the colony
which the English company had
planted on the bank of the river. The
sheriff of the county had arrived, but
the governor had declined to interfere
at the present state of affairs.
Such was the condition of matters
when at nine o'clock, to the astonish
ment of everybody, a regiment of in
fantry, one thousand strong, full
marching order and armed with maga
zine guns, made its appearanee at th.?
edge of the town on the Paducah rail
road, and came down the main street
as far as the bank in fine order, pre
ceded by a drum corps of four pieces.
The astonishment and excitement at
this sudden invasion were increased ten
fold by the banner which spread out to
the morning breeze, and which had
inscribed on it legibly: "First Battal
ion American Workingmen. No Tyr
anny of Money. ' No Coercion of Capi
itaL" Where the regiment had come from,
how far it had marched or what
v - intentions, no one knew. But
it did not take long for t!ie rumor to
form and fly that it was a working
man's regiment, and would not take
the F.ide of the employers.
When it had reached the -ittle
square where tha bank stood it was
drawn up. A skirmish lino was
thrown out, pickets stationed and the
crowd forced back.
The colonel and his staff then went
into the bank. The disposition of the
men in the street was such that access
to the bank was impossible, and as the
doorway was on a level with the street
it was impossible for the crowd to see
what was going on, save that there
was a constant fluctuation in the
ranks of the men.
The regiment stood there quite two
hours and a half. In the meantime
there was great commotion at the
company's works. The sheriff set off
in a carriage with Mr. Matlock, fol
lowed by half a score of deputies to
reach the bank, but were stopped by
the pickets. The officer protested and
threatened, but in vain. When asked
if the governor had sent them, the
soldiers replied: "You must talk to
the colonel, but you cannot pass the
lines at present."
'If the colonel desires to protect the
bank, ho will confer with me," said
Mr. Matlp.sk.
"I don't know what h?3 orders are,"
said the soldier. "Better wit till he
calls on you at the works."
The sheriff, in high dudgeon, then
rushed to the telegraph office. It is an
hour before he gets an answer from
the governor at Lexington and it is:
"Have not authorized use of troops
must be mistake about regiment. What
do you mean?"
Then followed several of the absurd
est of dispatches.
"No mistake," says the sheriff. "Reg
iment, one thousand strong, armed
with repeating rifles."
"Impossible," says the governor.
"Your fears or your condition has
made you wild. There is not such a
regimental formation in the state. If
j-ou cannot preserve the peace will
send, the Louisville Lightguards
ninetv-four men. The law must be
upheld."
r..'" 111 f 1 I 11 1 lr-t D i l
Ml
SIX MEN WITH CLUBS AND
Then Matlock corroborated the
sheriff.
"Regiment of armed men in posses
sion of the bank. Must have the pro
tection of the state at once. The sher
iff is helpless."
To this the governor still incredu
lously replies: "Regiment must have
transportation, now did it come? An
swer at once if it invaded the state
from Ohio."
"Impossible to tell was the answer.
"No one knows how it got here. It
is drawn up on Main street at present.
Have failed to communicate with
officers."
After some delay, the governor sent
this word:
"Will arrive in the morning with
Adjt. Gen. Luscomb. Do nothing till
I get there."
While this was going on an hour was
lost and it was three o'clock. At half
past three o'clock the regiment was
moved from the bank to the vicinity of
the company's works. It proceeded in
fine open order and was cheered along
the route by the people. A strong
guard was left at the bank and no one
allowed to enter.
On the company's common it was
again drawn up a strong encircling
line of pickets thrown out and the fol
lowing note sent about five o'clock to
the director:
"Sir: The first batallion of the
workingmen's advance guard will pro
tect property until the state takes pos
session. I shall encamp my men on
the outskirts until to-morrow. Let the
citizens retire to their homes till that
time."
After several attempts to see the
colonel, the sheriff sent "a communica
tion to him:
"Sir: Will you inform the authori
ties of this county by what right you
invade this state. As the legally con
stituted officer of the county, I demand
that you appear before me and explain
your conduct under penalty of arrest."
To this the colonel made no answer.
It was six o'clock in the evening
when the regiment was marched to an
open tract on the southwest terrace
overlooking the town; strong guards
were thrown out in all directions and
apparent preparations made for going
into camp. As there was nothing for
the town to do but wait the arrival of
the governor in the morning, it slowly
quieted down. The camp fires of the
military burned in a long row on the
far terrace. The regular beat of the
drum was heard far into the night,
which was an unusually dark one, and
at twelve o'clock all was still.
But as soon as it was light the
streets were thronged. There were
the firet on the terrace smoking as if
with preparations for breakfast and
the white tent of the colonel could be
plainly seen. The early train brought
in a crowd of idle men, but the rail
road officials denied having seen any
regiment.
As soon as the day was fairly arrived
crowds began to make their way to
the edge of the camp. The guard had
been withdrawn from the bank in the
night and at seven o'clock Matlock re
ceived word that the regiment had dis
appeared. He went immediately to
the bank with the sheriff. At the same
time the news of the disappearance
spread like wildfire. Crowds over-ran
the camping ground, but not a sign of
the soldiers could be found except the
smouldering fires, the remaining tent
and the strong smell of the trodden
grass, with here and there a dropped
fragment of clothing a cartridge or a
piece of food.
Then it w?.s that the director dia
covered that all the specie had been re
moved from the ban!.-. A great crowd
had gathered round the entrance, lie
got upon ji chair and in an excited
manner conveyed the information. It
was received with incredulous jeers,
cries of ''Served you right. We don't
believe it.- Yon brought the soldiers,
etc," and the wildest excitement
ensued.
The sheriff was paralyzed and lost
his head. He sent telegrams to Louis
ville and Cairo calling on the author
ities to arrest all soldiers in blue shirts
and duck trousers armed with Spencer
rifles. He arrested the agents at the
Paducah railroad and held them for
collusion. Armed parties were sent
out on the highways and discovered
nothing but straggling men drawn to
the town by the news.
Every other subject was now
swallowed up in the robbery of the
bank, and upon the arrival of the gov
ernor and his adjutant in the after
noon, there ensued a scene of in
credulous indignation' and fussy of
ficialism. The adjutant, an old-tirH?
veteran with purely Kentucky prej
udices and Kentucky dignity, immedi
ately framed a theory that there had
been a raid from southern Indiana,
and ws.a for calling upon the governor
of that state to make good t. loss and
to return the raiders for punishment.
In Louisville, Cairo and Cincinnati,
the most extraordinary accounts were
published in the papers. One of the
sheets announced in its head lines:
"The English, syndicate at St. Mary's
makes away with a million and a half
of money belonging to the working
men." A paper in Louisville announced that
Kentucky had been invaded by an army
of Indiana free-booters, and its head
lines were startling. "Are we to have
another civil war?" they asked.
"Shall an invading army desolate
Kentucky while our apathetic officials
are dickering with the bloated barons?
Let there be a call to arms."
One fact alone was clear to the
people of St. Mary's. The money and
the regiment had disappeared together.
That the astonishing circumstance
PISTOLS ORDERED THEM AWAY.
( did not at the time betray to the conn-
try some of the real facts was owing
to the muddle which the incompetent
Mr. Matlock and the pig-headed sheriff
and governor had produced in the
minds of the people. There was a
widespread suspicion among the work
ingmen that the superintendent was in
some way implicated in the removal,
of the gold, and nothing could eradi-.
cate from the governor's head the no
tion that the regiment was an exag-
era ted ruse which had been brought
about by a descent of invading villains
from southern Indiana.
Hendricks had counted on this very
result. His motto was: "Audacity
that bewilders and then, energy that
disorganizes."
CHAPTER XV.
It is necessary now to keep in mind
two orders of events. One is the slow;
focussing of public suspicion about the
operations at Laran. The other is the
extraordinary relationship of the prin
cipal personages at the headquarters'
of the conspiracy.
A week passes and men are strag
gling back to the Laran from all over
the country. They come in through
the woods at night singly or in little
groups. They arrive at the Wash
bayou, coming down from St. Louis
and crossing at night from the Ar
kansas shore; they come up from
Memphis looking for work and some
of them ride in from the mountains of
East Tennessee.
Hendricks watches the reassembling
with cool calculation and appears to
have been satisfied of the main re
sults. About fifteen per cent, of the
men never reappeared, "f his was ac
cording to his calculations. But the
rest, actuated by the fear of individual
peril, the esprit de corps of military
organization, or the desire to go on
with the war which a master-spirit
had planned, had, in great part, re
turned at the end of the week. At that
time there were by count five hundred
and fifty men of the regiment back in
the cave.
Hendricks sat up all one night read
ing the papers that had been brought
him from Memphis. He went over all
the accounts carefully. There was not
in any of them a surmise as to the
truth. The regiment had got away
and it had accomplished its purpose,
but the further away from the scene
the comments were, the less seriously
the newspapers regarded the occur
rence. In New York there was some
kind of enormous western practical
joke suspected. "How," said one jour
nal, "a regiment of a thousand men
can come and go without observation,
can dismantle a bank and then depart
with a million dollars in specie without
being detected or interfered with or
tracked, remains for the imaginative
west to explain. It looks very much
at this distance as if the English
company had been operating in phan
toms to bear its own market."
An angry official correspondence had
taken place between the governor of
Tennessee and the governor of Indiana.
The town of St. Mary's and the city ol
Paducah swarmed with newspaper
men and detectives. But it was plain
to nendricks that fresh troubles at St.
Mary's between the director and the
men threatened to draw attention
from the search for the soldiers,
fro be cosnsnnj
Intensely Llappr.
Husband And arc you happy, dar
ling?
Wife. Yes, indeed; as happy as If 1
had never been married. Hallo.
THE FOUR BIG ONES.
How the Leading- Republicans Figaro M
Presidential Possibilities.
The elections have raised four re
publican leaders into greater prom
inence as presidential candidates.
Harrison, Reed, McKinley and Morton
are the national "Big Four." Each has
his elements of strength and of weak
ness. As ex-president, Mr. Harrison leads
in prestige. Be has gained rather
than lost in popularity within his
party since his defeat. He has
strengthened himself by his able,
tactful and effective speeches and by
his willingness to help the party and
serve his friends. He still lives in a
state that is doubtful under normal
political conditions. That he was de
feated as a candidate for reelection
would operate against him were it not
for the precedent of Mr. Cleveland's
success on a second trial under pre
cisely similar circumstances. Unless
the situation shall materially change
meanwhile. Gen. Harrison will be a
strong force to be reckoned with by
the republican aspirants and managers
in 1898.
Ex-Speaker Reed represents the
aggressive, younger element of his
party. His strong intellectuality has
impressed itself on the country. He
will have a fine chance to renew his
hectoring of the beaten democrats at
the approaching session of congress.
When the new congress meets in De
cember, 1895, Mr. Reed will probably
be reelected speaker. Whether he
would strengthen himself with his
party in that position is not so clear.
Even republicans do not like to be
bossed too much. Mr. Reed's location
on the extreme eastern edge of the
union and in a safe republican state
is against him as a presidential candi
date. And still he is a possibility.
As for Mr. McKinley, he will natu
rally accept this year's landslide as a
belated vindication of his tariff bill
that was twice condemned by the peo
ple. His friends in Ohio, with fatuous
promptitude already put him forward
as the logical candidate for 1895.
Events are likely to undeceive them.
The country is not anxious to jo back
to higher taxes and dearer living. The
shrewdest republican leaders and jour-
nals disclaim any intention of restor
ing the McKinley tariff. Of what use
is McKinley without McKinleyism?
And yet the former lives in the lucky
central 6tate of Ohio, and he has a de
voted following.
Last, but perhaps not least, comes
Levi P. Morton, governor-elect of
New York, long the pivotal state, and
destined to be for years a potent in
fluence in national affairs. Mr. Mor
ton is rich, affable, in a certain sense
popular, and he will, if alive and well
in 1S96, have the backing of adroit po
litical managers. Should he really
make a reform record as governor,
which we must pay we do not antici
pate, he would acquire a new element
of availability. Yet with Mr. Mor
ton's character, affiliations and pecul
iar career as a public man in the past,
we can conceive of no nomination
from among the republican big four
that would bo so satisfactory to the
democrats as his. It is certainly the
one which we most sincerely hope for.
It would be a most interesting cam
paign. We wish for Mr. Piatt all suc
cess in his grooming of Mr. Morton.
The next president trill be a democrat.
N. Y. World.
AMERICANISM SIMON PURE.
President Cleveland's Idea of Respect to
the Stars and Stripes on the Ocean.
President Cleveland gave a charac
teristic exhibition of the courageous
plain speaking, which has been the
chief cause of his popularity, at Phil
adelphia when he took occasion at the
launching of the new steamship of
the American line to make a vigorous
attack upon our absurd navigation
laws! The great steamship about
which all the newspapers are
hurrahing would never have been
built had not those laws been
modified The president reminded
his hearers of that fact and advised
them to couple their rejoicings over
the great event with a determination
to do away with the laws entirely, and
thus "set free American mechanical
industry and excite American enter
prise." We commend to all disciples
of good Americanism the following
passage from his speech:
"I am not able to see why Americans dwning
ships, navigated by Americans and carrying
American cargoes, should in any case be driven
to the protection of a foreign nag, and it seems
to me that the stars and stripes entering a
port of the United States and spread over
Americans and American property should
never be frowned upon and repelled by Amer
ican officials acting under the mandate of our
navigation laws. In the interest of a revival
of American commerce, so much needed, and
for the honor of our flag, so dear to us all. I am
willing th.it the defense of our governmant
and flag shall be accorded to all ships of Aier
ieaa ownership, wherever built. Make our
flag a more familiar sight in the ocean-carrying
trade, and thus remind our citizens that a
large share of the carrying trade of the world
Is due them, and we need have no fear that our
ship builders, under laws giving them a fair
chance, will suffer from foreign competition."
This heretical deliverance seems to
have been well received in the very in
nermost sanctuary of protection. N.Y.
Post.
-A single session of a republican
congress is all that is needed to get
the democrats together for a sweep in
1890. N. Y. World,
UNCLE SAM I Didn't Think It Wothj Come to This Again. N. Y. Wcrid.
CONGRESSIONAL INDICATIONS.
A Republican Scheme for the Next Pres
idential Campaign.
Those who refer to the republican
triumph as a barren victory are scarce
ly justified, and in facing the inev-J
itable conflict of two years hence it is
the part of wisdom to study the situa
tion as it really is. There is a pres
tige in such a result that gives con
fidence to the rank and file, even
though the leaders may more clearly
read the signs of the times and be less
sanguine as to the future of the party.
The enemy has captured both branches
of congress, and while the fifty-fourth
session of that body can give the force
of law to no legislation which does not
meet the approval of President Cleve
land, the mere fact that the republic
ans have a majority cannot but
strengthen their hands temporarily
throughout the country. .
But by the time that the new congress
convenes, about thirteen months
hence, conditions wiU be materially
changed, and before its work is done a
complete revulsion of public sentiment
is almost certain to be encountered.
Judging from the past, the first session
of that body will be devoted almost
exclusively to making material for the
presidential campaign, which will open
before its deliberations are closed.
Just what lines they will follow to the
accomplishment of this purpose ia
largely a matter of conjecture. If
they give heed to the old adage that
they who serve their country best
serve their party best, some good may
be expected of them If they proceed
to the passage of such prudent, non
partisan measures as the business and
the welfare of the country require,
and the president can approve, they
will do well.
If, on the other hand, they elect to
revive the tariff legislation, disturb
ing and alarming the country by the
passage of laws which cannot receive
executive approval, if they renew the
threat against the freedom of elections
and popular government by bringing up
the odious force bill again, if they un
dertake to unseat members whom the
people have elected at the polls, if, in
short, they give the country another
Reed congress like that of 1890, we
may look with confidence for another
tidal wave in 1890, and it will be de
mocracy that is swept into power.
There are indications that the next
congress will not be governed by the
wisdom of true statesmanship. De
feated candidates are already clam
oring for seats to which they
are not elected, monopolists are
howling for the restoration of
special privileges of which demo
cratic legislation deprived them, and
many of the republican organs are
professing a belief that in the result
of the election there is a call for a res
toration of McKinleyism. If the next
congress accepts what has been ac
complished by its predecessor, there is
an acknowledgment that it is right. If
it seeks to overthrow the work done
by democracy, then it invites repub
lican defeat in 1896. Detroit Free
Press.
NOTES AND COMMENTS.
The tone which Sherman, Reed
and other republican leaders are tak
ing on the tariff issue makes it plain
that McKinley will have to change
that familiar speech of his or get out
of the race, Detroit Free Press.
- Chairman Wilson has not any
where found republicans advocating
a repeal of the new tariff or a reenact
ment of the McKinley law. And still
there are idiots who say that the elec
tions were a rebuke of tariff reform.
St. Louis Republic.
Why should not the republicans
inaugurate their new regime witb
bounties of fifty cents a bushel on
wheat and five cents a pound on cot
ton? These would be just as reason
able as their bounty of two cents a
pound on sugar. Louisville Courier-
Journal.
Rspublican
leaders are
display
the fact
ing no little equanimity over
that they will not have to formulate
any policy for more than a year. The
vicissitudes of the past six years have
taught them to walk softly before the
people, and not to run before they are
sent. Republican leadership and
party discipline appeared to great ad
vantage in 1889-90, in everything ex
cept making an egregious mistake as
to what the country wanted or would
stand. That leadership and discipline
will doubtless prove as effective in the
next congress, and, unless the bitter
fruits of experience have been tasted
in vain, far wiser, far more sensitive
to public opinion. N. Y. Post.
In view of the present trend of
political events It may be questioned
if the next republican candidate is
likely to be taken from the prominent
figures who led the party so blindly to
disaster in 1S93. The rank and file of
the party do not want McKinley or Mc
Kinleyism. This fact has found ex
pression a thousand times since 1892.
Neither does it want the sarcastic and
reckless Reed. Harrison, who remains
to our mind the most likely candidate
for 1896, is closely identified with the
colossal blunders which led to the dis
aster of 1892. The selection of either
of these candidates would be a declar
ation that the republican party pro
posed to go back to the linvs of Mc
Kinleyism and an unknown currency
policy. Utica Observer.
PITH AND , (POINT.
Powell "Henpeckt feels sure that
his wife went to a better world." Mit
ford "How do you know?" Powell
"He has started in to be tough." Har
lem Life.
-r-Chawier "Did yer go inter see dt
snake charmer?? Hengoutt 'Yes, an
it's a question to me mind wedder she
charms de snakes or paralizes dem."
Boston Courier.
'Watts "So yon don't believe that
the good' die young?" Potts "That
used to bother, me a good deal when I
was a boy, but I know, better now."
Indianapolis Journal. s
Agnes "What are you writing,
Minnie your will?" Minnie "No, I'm
writing my won't. George proposed
last night and I told him I'd answer to
day." London Tid-Bits.
Figg "Yesj I allow that her sing
ing is something terrible; but I guess
we shall live throught it." Fogg
That is the most terrible thing about
it." Boston Transcript.
"No," said the busy merchant; "1
don't care for no dictionaries to-day."
"Thank you," returned the fair book
agent from Boston; "how many shall I
put you down for?" Smith & Gray'a
Monthly. :
Wages (meditatively) "It might
be considered additional proof that
time is money." Wiggs "What
might?" Waggs "The fact that so
many people take no note of it." Buf
falo Courier.
Mr. A. 'Must look at that dolt of
a man. What a charming wife he has.
How true it is that the biggest fool al
ways marry the prettiest girls." Mrs.
A. '"O, you flatterer." Boston Com
mercial Bulletin.
Amy "Why did you marry Harry,
who never sent you any presents,
while you refused Jack, who was al
ways giving you jewelry, candy, books
and the like?" Mabel "Jack had
spent all his money." Harper's Bazar.
"Mother," sobbed the young bride,
"he is just as mean as he can be."
"No, he isn't, dear," said the mother
soothingly. "A man can't really de
velop all his meanness till he has been
married four or five years." Indianap
olis Journal.
A Gentle nint. Jones (meeting
Brown smoking) "I don't like to see
a man smoking on the street." Brown
"Why, what difference does it
make?" Jones 'A great deal. It
makes me want to do the same, and I
haven't anything to smoke." Detroit
Free Tress.
Manager "The idea in your play
is as old as the hills. It has been done
before." Playwright "What's it been
done in?" Manager "Well, it occurs
in one of the tragedies of JEschylus."
Playwright "That's all right. I may
have got my copyright in ahead of him.
There is a chance for a suit." Brook
lyn Life.
Daughter "What do you think,
mamma! That strange gentleman who
just got out when we were going
through the tunnel kissed me." Mother
"But, my child, why didn't you tell
me at once, so that I could call him to
account for it?" Daughter "Why, you
see, mamma, I thought I thought
that we were coming to another tun
nel!" Fliegende Blaetter.
COUNTING FOR A HUSBAND.
A New Matrimonial Superstition Which
Sometimes Works and Sometime Does
Not.
Just as the train pulled up at Chel
sea avenue station, Long Branch, a
very pretty girl darted forward to greet
a young man who stepped to the plat
form. Pleasure and triumph struggled
for possession of her bonnie face as she
grasped his extended hand and ex
claimed: "Thirty-one got eleven of them on
the drive to-day!"
"Is that all?" returned her escort
"Sixty-four!"
"Sixty-four!" shrieked the giri.
"Where did you get them? You're real
mean; you said going up to town
wouldn't be much of an advantage to
you, as they weren't wearing them now
to any extent."
"Well, neither are they," said the
berated one. "The fact is, I met a
chowder party going out of town, and,
in accordance with the etiquette of such
occasions, they all wore 'em."
"Oh!" said the maid, "what a glorious
chance; and I suppose you were glad."
"No, Lyle. I was sorry you weren't
there. You know we must try to keep
even, i certainly will not snaice nanas
with anv other than yourself when my
number is complete, and it will be em
harassing to say the least to refuse
shaking any dainty little paws that
may be offered me. So you'd better
make haste." But the girl didn't hear
him "Thirty-two. thirty-three, thir
ty-four," she exclaimed, breathlessly.
"They just got in a cab!"
"What is it all about?" I asked my
sister, who was helping me enjoy the
situation. '
"I believe you are the only man in
Long Branch who don't know. It's
quite the latest thing in matrimonial
superstitions. You must count nine
ty-nine white hats and four black ones
and you are sure to marry the first per
son of the opposite sex with whom you
shake hands the first eligible person I
mean. Of course, if I happen to meet
the ragman first the charm does not
hold good."
Whereupon I grinned maliciously
and said: "I always knew you were a
friendly soul, Grace, but do you shake
hands with the ragman T N. Y. Her
ald. Long-Distance Signals.
Seventy miles seem a long distance
to send signals by heliographs, but this
has been accomplished many times.
But this is entirely eclipsed by the re
cent performances of the officers of the
United States signal corps operating in
the northwest. Messages have been
sent and received between Mount Un
compahre, in Colorado, and Mount
Ellen, in Utah, a distance from peak to.
peak of one hundred and eighty-three
miles. Experiments are in progress
with a view to increasing; this distance
and breaking all previous records. N.
Y. Ledger.
Growing Affection. .
Teacher Now, Jimmy, do you re
member your first teacher?
Jimmy Yes, mom!
Teacher WeU, don't you love her
better as the years go on for what she
did for you?
Jimmy Yes, mom she's dead now J
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Something Gained.
Inquirer Does a fish diet strengthen
the brfln?
Philosopher Perhaps not; but going
fishing seems to invigorate thtt imagi
nation. N. Y. Weekly.