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Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, July 28, 1889, SECOND PART, Image 15

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Persistent link: https://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn84024546/1889-07-28/ed-1/seq-15/

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liD Cooney, the coai
carrier, was- sorrow
fully sitting on the
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s roadside not far from
the spot where the
shanty had been stand
ing in which old
Cooney had been Hy
ing all his life. The
fact of the matter was
that the coal car
rier had lost his home
that Tery morning by
a fire, and his trouble was in consequence
very great.
"What can I do now?" he complained to
himself, "1 bare not a place in the world
to sleep in, and when my wife comes home
she will scold me so much that I shall never
hear the last of it"
"While he was yet talking to himself and
almost erring at his misfortune his wile,
who had been away from home for several
davs. came alone the road, and when sue
got to the spot where Cooney sat she cried:
"Well. Cooney. where is our house?"
For a moment or two the old man did not
know what to say. but at last he manfully
looked up to the woman and replied:
"A fire broke out in the place last night,
and the whole place burned down to the
ground. I onlv succeeded to save my
"Well, if you were fool enough to have
the house burned up around your ears, I
wish the demon of fire would come and burn
you up, too."
Thus said the woman in her wrathful
temper, but she never expected that her
words would have any serious consequences.
However, she had no more than uttered the
last word of her awful passion when there
WZx. ,.j-
The Demon1 Gift.
was a noise in the sky so terrible that it re
sembled very much the roaring of an en
raged lion or the rolling of approaching
thunder. In the next moment a cloud,
right above the spot where Cooney and his"
stood opened up, and the vision of a fiery
demon appeared before them. The two peo
ple almost sank to the ground with fear
and trembling, and neither of them was
able to utter a sign.
"Woman, what do yon want?" a deep
Toice now came from the apparition. When
Cooney's wife heard that the voice was
quite human she lost some of her fear and
"Here is my husband, who has been fool
enough to let our house burn down, while
he was in it, and the thought of great loss
made me so mad that I said I wished he
were buret as well."
"But maybe he could not help it," re
plied the vision of fire, "do you think that
you could stop the flames if they attacked
your house?"
"Yes, 1 am sure I could," quickly re
torted the woman, "if I were in the house
"All right, my dear woman," said the
voice from the cloud. "I am the demon of
fire, and since you are so very smart I will
give you the opportunity. I will give you
another house, and one that is finer and
stronger than the one you had before. But
mind you be careful, or you might meet
with the same misfortune as your husband
Then the demon disappeared, and again
that rolling, roaring noise was heard, but
Lefore the last echoes had died awrnr in th,
distant hills, Cooney and his wife were as
tonished so that they could hardly believe
their eyc, when in the place where the old
shanty had stood they beheld a beautiful
residence fitted with all the appurtenances
and accommodations anyone might wish
"Well, if that is the new bouse the demon
of fire wants us to have, let us get 'in,
Cooney," said the wife, "now you see
whether I will not be able to take care of
the place as long as we live."
Ertering the wide oaken doors thev both
stepped into the hall, which was a master
piece of elegant architecture. All the walls
were empaneled with costly woodworks; the
floors were covered with the finest carpets,
and from the windows gorgeous curtains of
the richest silks were hanging in heavy
folds, and the furniture was all of the most
magnificent wood and workmanship. The
coal carrier and his wife stared at all this
splendor in utter bewilderment, and as they
walked clltnroughthe house, lrom room to
room, their astonishment increased. At
last they came into the kitchen. A jolly
fire was burning here in the stove, and a
piece ot beef was waiting to be roasted.
"The sight of that meat mates me hun
gry," said Cooney's wife; "now let me cook
it as quick as I can and we will presently
enjoy a nice dinner."
She immediately set to work and put the
roast on the stove, but she unfortunately
came too close to the fire and before she
knew what she was about her dress was all
in flames. Instead of getting her husband to
fetch some water and have it pntout,she ran
wildly around and shrieked Su loud that the
ceiling threatened to come down. From the
kitchen she ran ito the parlor, and here the
beautiful carpet nnd curtains caught the
flames, until the whole house was a mass of
flames. Cooney had just time enough to
catch hold of her and carry her outside, or
the woman would have burned tin. WVi-n
he got her into the air he succeeded in get
ting her to a well and, dumping her right
iuto the water, the fire of her clothes was
put out But when he pulled her out, and
both looked around, the house was already
consumed by the raging fire, and nothing
but the ruins were left.
What with her fright and the burns
which Cooney's wife had sustained, the
woman began to bewail her misfortune in a
most pitiful manner. The husband did all
he could to console her, but she was too
downhearted. At last, however, her na
ture got again the better of her.
"What is the use of such a stupid wooden
house anyhow?" she said; "if the demon
meant to do us some good, I wish he had
given us a stone bouse that wouldn't have
burned down so quickly."
No sooner had she said co, however, when
that roaring noise in the clouds came on
again, which had once before heralded the
arrival of the demon of fire.
"H'ui!" he said to the woman, with the
most sarcastic smile on his fiery face, "you
didn't look after the house as well as you
said you would, although you were in it
yourself, nnd it ii just a wonder that you
did not lose your life too. Had it not been
for your iclnd husband you would certainly
not be alive now."
"That is all very well to talklthat way,"
the woman replied, "but who wfculd have
thought that a house would have burned up
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so quickly as that Had it been made of
stone instead of timber I believe it would
be there yet"
"So you want a stone house, do you?"
"Yes, of course I do," Cooney's wife re
plied; "how can anybody live in a wooden
building and not be in constant danger of
being burned up7"
"All right, you shall have a stone bouse
now. and I will see how long that will last
you." When the demon had uttered these
words be disappeared again, and behold! a
grand granite structure stood before the couple
in the place where the wooden house had
burned not long ago.
"That is what I call a house!" now remarked
the woman; "come along; Cooney, and let us
eniov life in comfort for the future."
"I don't know," replied Cooney, "but I do
not think that it makes much difference what
kind of a house you live in as long as yon are
happy and contented with yourself. And as
for fire, nobody can prevent it. Do your best to
stop it I say, and for the rest trustto luck; that
is all I believe in."
Bat Cooney's wife did not listen to her hus
band; she tbougbt she was smarter than all the
rest of tbe people.
"You come along and I will show you how we
shall got on now. Ffre can't do any harm to
stone, and I don t think we will hare any more
"I don't know," said Cooney. quietly, "it
seems to me you are nowhere safe from the
demon of fire."
And he was right
No sooner bad he and his wife reached the
first step of tbe front entrance when a stroke
of lightning descended upon the house, and in
a second tbe whole massive structure which a
moment ago seemed to be strong enough to
withstand an earthquake, bad crumbled to
pieces, and not a whole stone was left upon the
For tbe third time tbe demon appeared and
looking at Coonev's wife, standing utterly
aghast and crestfallen beside her husband, he
"Well now, you could not even keep tbe
stone house long enough to get inside and look
at it before even that was destroyed. Don't
you think it is about time for you to acknowl
edge that you nor any other mortal being can
rule the elements!" .
"Yes. I do acknowledge it" tbe woman said,
as meekly as a child, and looking'all tbe time as
forlorn as a duck among a lot of bens.
"Well, then. I hope you w ill not forget ever
to think so. Be patient and take misfortune
the best way yon can. Yonr husband had no
more to do with tbe fact that tbe old wooden
shanty burned down than you had to do with
the destruction of this building. Still yon
thought you were so much smarter, and
you defied eveD me, the demon of fire. But
there, be wiser in tbe future and remember
that tbongh you may play with fortune you
can never defy it"
With that sentence of wbolesome admonition
to the old coal carrier's wife the demon of fire
disappeared once more. When Cooney and his
wife looked up from their astonishment, tbey
noticed their old shanty again In tbe same
place where it had been before.
"Now come and let us go in and be thankful,
that we still have yet our dear old borne." said
Cooney: "let us be satisfied ar.d be careful of
what we have got Be it ever so small and ever
so poor, I believe that contented people can be
just as happy In a nutshell as a king in bis
"I think you are right" said his wife, "and
believe me, I will never again defy tbe demon
of fire."
A Seven-Koot Serpent Make it Lively for
a Toledo Fisherman.
Toledo Commercial.
Captain A. B. Couldvell, who is summering
at Edgewater, had an interesting and unusual
experience for this latitude with a snake at
Wigton's Point the other day. He was fishing
In the creek, and bad occasion to go ashore,
and, after tying bis small string of perch to the
stern of the boat the Nellie C. he pu'led her
upon the beach. Half an hour later be re
turned, but just in time to see his prized boat
moving slowly toward the center of tho stream.
Without a second thought he rushed into the
water, through the wild rice, and leaped into
the boat The mystery which bad shrouded
tbe affair was dissolved when he discovered
tbat a monstrous snake had swallowed one of
the perch, and had ton ed tbe boat out Could
well got a little excited. He seized an unwieldy
punt pole, and, with a well directed aim,
struck tbe snake across the back, which had
tbe effect of breaking tbe stringer but enraged
the snake. "It whirled and started for tbe oc
cupants of the boat with an open mouth," said
CouldwelL "tbat would take in a 45-cent water
melon." The other occupant of tbe boat, his young
daughter, became frightened, and thought of
all the wonderful pictures seen in show bills
where oxen are represented as being devoured
by thee enormous reptiles. Couldwell took to
the oars: this gavo the snake new courage and
be was soon alongside and forced an anchor
age. Conldwell's good nature vanished, and
with tbe strength of a Kilrain he struck the
snake upon tbe bead, following up tbis advan
tage with well-aimed blows until be beheld his
adversary slain before him. It measured 7
feet and was of a swamp species; a dark, nar
row streak down tbe back from bead to tail,
and yellow and red stripes around tbe body.
Tbis species is seldom seen in this climate. Mr.
Conldwell unfortunately neglected to bring his
game into camp, declaring tbat he was satis
fied to get away 3ately.
How it Philadelphia Gentleman Enjoys tho
Forbidden Weed.
Philadelphia l'ress.:
Ira Tripp, a retired coal operator of Scranton,
Is one of the few men on record who enjoys the
luxury of smoking by proxy. Twenty years
ago his physician told him tbat smoking was
prejudicial to bis health, and that he must stop
the practice. Although he was a confirmed
smoker, he obeyed tbe doctor's Injunction.
Since then be has never smoked a cigar. At the
same time he has not totally denied himself
bis chief luxury. To indulge It without disobey
ing the doctor's injunction he employs what
nngbt be called his "smoking valet"
It is tho duty ot tbis man to smoke a Havana
cigar whenever Mr. Tripp feels like indulging
in a little tobacco dissipation, and blow the
smoke in bis employer's face. Tbe latter eager
ly inhales tbe fragrant cloud and then exhales
it through bis nostrils and blows it down
through the meshes ot bis long, white beard.
Mr. Tripp declares thathe enjoys this second
banded smoke as keenly as when he did tbe
puffing himself. He often comes to Philadel
phia, and never tiavels without his smoking
Illgb Temperature Seems to Make Feople
Tnke Their Own Lives.
New York Star. 3
Dr. Michael J. B. Messemer, the Coroner, is
a student of tbe weather and suicides. Tbey
are subjects which have taken up considerable
of bis spare time, and he has become a convert
to tbe theory that prolonged hot weather is
followed by an Increase in the number of sui
cides. In a conversation upon this subject yes
terday, he said:
"I have followed the matter closely, and be
lieve It to be true that hot weather is Invariably
accompanied by an Increase in the number of
suicides, and when tbe hot wave is prolonged
for a week or inor It Is followed by almost a
suicidal epidemic in tbe city. On cool days
cidesy but let the thermometer go up. and a 1
rapid Increase is made." I
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AjUr IheFWe.
Some Facts Abont the Persevering
Masher of the Metropolis.
Possibilities of a Charmlnrr Young
Creature Upset By .
rconBxsroKDXNci or the dispatch. 3
Nctt Tons, July 27. The streets of New
York yield amusement always, even in mid
summer. I'm not a flirt, and I wouldn't
flirt anyhow on the street; and I do wonder
sometimes how a man can stand the humili
ation of making a goose ot. himself right in
broad daylight, and on Broadway, too, try
ing to attract the attention of a girl who
never gives him the least encouragement
They usually look like nice enough fellows,
and not at all the old style of masher. X
had a time with one of them yesterday.
Maud and I came out of a confectioner's
and stood on the corner of Twenty-fourth
street and quarreled about whether we
should go to tbe matinee at Casino or at the
Madison Square. Maud is awfully gone
on Barrymore, and she wanted to see "The
Burglar." Now, if there is anything I hate
it is going to see an actor I adore with an
other girl who adores him. For that matter,
when it comes to Barrymore, I'd just rather
go and contemplate him all alone. I mean
I'd rather go all alone and contemplate him.
Just from a quiet back row, and with no
body along but some candy. I think there
is nothing that seems to go so beautifully
with Barrymore as a sort of solitude and
cream drops. I didn't want that sort of
sacred feeling I have abont him interfered
with, and I said if we didn't go to the
i wouldn't go anywhebe.
Maud said she'd have to go homo to ask her
mother, and we fixed it up that meanwhile
I would go to tbe Casino and get the tickets.
I made her hand me 52. I had plenty of
money, but of course her mother might not
let her come back, and you know how It is
with girls in a business matter. Maud
crossed over to Fourth avenue lor the cars,
and I waited for a Broadway car.
Of course Maud and 1 had been talking a
good deal, and probably making gestures
with our parasols more or less; and I felt it
keenly when X found a man standing on the
corner of Twenty-fourth street just staring
and staring. He was like all of them, rather
short, !d a darkish gray suit very slick look
ing, a white vest dotted around with blue
silk spots, a blue necktie, a straw bat with
a blue band around and a cane with a big
silver handle. He had the regular big eyes
ana drooping nam mustache and purplish
look around his chin that so many New
York men have. I think tbey want to look
like Kelcey. He's lovely and purple all
around where he shaves..
"Wellj not to get on on Kelcey, I just
looked in a very direct way over this man's
shoulder, as if he wasn't there at all. I
think that's the best way to do, for you can
see them perfectly well, and yet they can't
mine you are noticing them, of course,
when you come so near to noticing them
they always think you will the next minute,
but I don't think any right-minded person
could regard looking over a man's shoulder
as if he wasn't there as encouraging him.
I got on the car just as dignified. He
swung on the other end of the car, and all
the way np to tbe Casino he pulled his
mustache and looked at me. I couldn't
help wishing I bad sat on the other side of
the car, because I know my profile looks
much better on the flare side of my hat; but
one can't think of everything. I screwed
my under lip together a little and wore my
eyebrows pulled down at the outer ends.nnri
just lifted the least bit in the world at the
inner ends. It gives a sort of bored and at
the same time nnconscious look. I thine it
is awful bad taste for a girl to look as if she
knew a man was looking at her when he is.
It is so apt to make.the man speak, or do
something dreadful, and then the women
around always think you aren't used to
being stared at and it gives them a kind of
contempt for you.
Well, when we got to the Casino I stopped
the car, and went just straight ahead. I
had a moment of awful anxiety, wondering
whether he would get off, too. Of course I
couldn't look around, not even by turning
to hold my skirt up, because such a thing is
perfectly palpable. I just joined the line
at the box office, and made up my mind that
I had lost him. But, when I turned around
with the tickets, there he was right face to
face. I looked right at him as if I had never
seen him before, and as if I didn't even
know I was looking; and sort of let mv eyes
drift contemplatively through his .head, as
if my mind was full of thinking about
something else. Well. Maud didn't come.
and, if yon will believe it, that man stood
up the whole performance by a post, expect
ing everv moment I would see him or some
thing. I -never did, though. I just kept
uiy aueuuon near enougn to mm to Keep
him from going and yet not to encourage
him. I felt rather'scared when I came to go
out, because I was afraid he might speak,
which, of conrse, would have been awful;
but he didn't though he stood so I had to go
by right close to him. He rode as far up
town as Forty-second street, and then he
swung off. I wanted to turn around and
just give him one look of indignation, so as
to show him my opinion ot a man who fol
lowed a person around so; but I didn't dare,
for fear he would stop the car and get on
These impertinent men are equal to just
doing anything. I couldn't help thinking
though, how stupid he was to waste his
whole alternoon like that with no encour
agement at all. He might have seen from
the first that I wasn't the sort of girl to al
low anything like street attention. It's so
common and vulgar.
Most of us latter-day people believe our
selves more or less capable of divining char
acter from the facial features, and I thought
my ability to do so was unfailing until an
occurrence oi recent date proved tbat I was
as blind as a stone wall. For more than a
year I have observed, in my movements
about New York, a girl whose face sug
gested a great many sweet aud innocent
possibilities to me." f have met her driving,
in theaters and in cafes, and always I found
a charm in her fair young face and her
manner ot gentle repose. As she has al
ways been in tbe company of a sedate-looking
man of 40, and as she was about 20, 1
was not able to determine whether she was
the wife or the daughter ot her companion.
I had often pointed out the girl to my
friends when I chanced upon her in a pub
lic resort, and I secured for her more honest
compliments then most pretty girls 'are the
recipient of. Not long ago I was dining at
a hotel with some friends, including a gen
tleman from Boston, when my charmer
entered tbe room with the man I
had always seen attending her. Imme
diately I began to admire her, and
to call everyone's attention to ber. Tbe gen
tleman from Boston started in a peculiar way
me instant mat nis ciance xeii noun me e-iri
and then he began to laugh. Upon demanding
an explanation tho only reply tbat I could ob
tain from him was that it was very unwise to
trust appearances, and tbat I had better banish
this young lady from tbe favorite corner of my
mind. I was provoked by bis manner, because
there seemed to bo a desire to slander a girl by
Innuendo, a most despicable custom.
However, the incident went out of my mind
until something near a week later I received a
letter from Boston enclosing a cheap photo
graph of a girl, tbe very girl I bad so long ad
mired. Across tbe bust were tbe words "In
spector's Office, Iloston," while tbe number
1276 appeared above tbe head. The accom
panying note called my attention to some
writing on the back of tbe picture. I turned
it over, and there round a record of crime.
Among tbe aliases of tbe girl were "Beautiful
Cora," "Lady Eggleston," and "Madame de
Laurent" Her real name was a common one,
and her character was "foreer AnA fcAt1 hat "
Ana now I am not fancying sweet possibilities
for tbe pretty and Innocent faces tbat I meet
fcTtbe routine of daily life. Claea EjEIXE.
He Preaches Against Aldlug- Slave to Es
cape, hot Feela Comtral&ed to As
sist Them When the Oppor
tunity Arise A Remin
iscence of the Un- w
dcrsround Kail
road. mimx ron the dispatch.'.
Those who have come to maturity since
the War can hjave little conception of the
intensity with which political questions were
discussed during the decade from 1SC0 to 1SC0.
At no other period in onr nation's history did
tbe conscience element enter so largely into af
fairs of State.
ThA nnmnromlse measnres of 1850 "framed
iniquity into a law" by placing every citizen
who sbeltt red a slave on his way to treedom in
the attitude of a criminal. More than this,
tbat law made It the duty of every citizen to
assist in the resone of a fugitive slave when
called on by the United States offlciaL Prior
to this enactment the agitation of the slavery
question was confined to a few, who were
looked upon by tbe public generally as fanatics
and lmpractlcables; men who were too narrow
in their views for the downright work of life.
The f ngitive slave law brought the question Of
Blavery to every fireside in tbe free States.
This law became at once a subject of discussion
in every debating club, and the effort of tbe
compromisers to quiet the discussion proved
the very means ot bringing the great national
Issue to every reflecting man's conscience.
An incident of tnat period which is fresh in
the writer's mind as the events ot yester
day will serve to illustrate how political issues
forced themselves on the conscience, and how
men were forced to decide between the higher
law and legislative enactment
About midway of the fifties a minister of one
of our neighboring counties presided over a
fiarish which was nearenoueh tbe Virginia
ine to be a refuge for large numbers of fugi
tive slaves. The parish covered a pretty large
territory, and within its bounds v. ere a number
of underground railroad stations, agents of
which being members of this minister's flock.
On all occasions the pastor enjoined obedi
ence to law, and said many sharp words against
the "lawless and disobedient" who arrayed
themselves against the Government of tbe
United States by helping slaves toward Can
ada. Time, however, proved that the preacher's
practice was better than his preaching. On a
certain occasion at his fireside a warm discus
sion was going on concerning tbis fugitive
slave law. Tbe question was directly put to
tbe venerable minister: "Wbatwould you do if
a party of fugitive slaves would to-night come
to your door, asking food and shelter J '
For a moment be seemed nonplused, and
then made a confession. Said be. "A few Sab
baths ago I was on my way to a preaching ap
pointment some ten miles from here. In a
quiet woody place, I met a family of colored
people who had a scared look and seemed tired,
and I at once knew tbey were fugitives. There
were a father and mother with a number of
children of various ages, from the little toddler
of 5 years who could, with difficulty make bis
way, up to the nearly grown maiden.
The father asked me if I conld direct bim to
a certain man's house, and I was at once con
firmed in tho ballet that they were fugitive
slaves, for tbe person inquired for was the
noted abolitionist of that section, and had
spent a small fortune in fines for harboring
fugitives. Yon may judge ' of my quandary.
On my way to preach a gospel which enjoined
me to "Remember those tbat were in bonds as
bound with them." what conld I do but show
them the shortest way to Mr. 'shouseT
A mile or two further on I met their pursuers,
who eagerly Inquired if I had seen a company
of colored people on the road. I had
plenty ot time to reach my preaching
appointment so I delayed the gentle
men as long as I could without
exciting their sespicions, and finally gave them
snch directions as would lead them a few miles
off from tbe underground railroad station. It
would not be true to say I told the slave hunt
ers the exact truth, and I was not conscious of
any qualms of conscience over the deception."
The conclusion to which one of tbe company
present came, was that men's hearts are often
better than their theories. It was easy enough
in the pulpit to urge obedience to law and the
dnty of tbe citizen to at least passively obey an
obnoxious statute, but in tbe presence of such
stubborn facts as tbe minister met the heart
responded to the higher law written there by
the hand Divine. Vousq.
A Thrilling Story Told by a Truthful Ten
rjesiee Conductor.
Chattanooga Tlmes.j
There are a large number of cheerful pre
varicators In Tennessee, and some very good
story tellers, but it has been left to a well
known freight conductor on the Western and
Atlantic Railway, who makes regular trips in
and out of Chattanooga, to tell the biggest
hot weather story yet recorded so far this
summer. One day tbis week while his train
was moving lazily along beneath the broiling
hot sun, with the scintillating rays coming in
aslant at a side window of his caboose and
playing on the black oilcloth covering ot a seat
near by, a sudden thought flashed through his
mind, although the beat was so oppressive tbat
a man would have been excusable for refusing
to think a thonght He received an inspira
tion, as it were, xrom tne not cushions and he
?roceeded to carry it out (the inspiration),
le happened to have a basket of fresh eggs in
the caboose which he had bought at a way sta
tion for his wife, and. taking occasional glances
at tbe basket he became desperately
So he waltzed over to the basket and,
secaring a nice, fresh looking egg, placed it on
tbe back cushion in the sun and awaited de
velopments. His experiment proved a success,
for while be stood anxiously watching the de
velopment of tbe scheme the egg shell cracked
and the egg was cooked, having been on the
hot cushion but 15 minutes. He repeated tbe
experiment a number of times with tbe same
success, and produced the egg shells to prove
it The conductor still holds his position on
tbe Western and Atlantic, cs tbe superintend
ent has never heard the story.
A 3Iachlne That Will Make the Services of
a Pitcher Unnecessary.
Atlanta Journal. 3
Out at East Point there Is a baseball crank
who is working on a patent ball tosser or pitcher
with which he expects to revolutionize the na
tional game.
His name is Quellman, and he is an ex-professional
ball player.
"Baseball is the greatest game on earth," be
says, "but there is one great objection to itand
that is the power of tbe umpire. His calling of
balls and strikes allows him to give tbe game to
either nine when tbe teams are well matched.
Now, my patent will do away with this ob
jectionable feature. It is a propelling ma
chine which will allow tbe man who stands in
the box to throw every ball over the plate. He
can elevate or lower it so as to throw a ball
anywhere between tbe knee and tha walt Tnn
velocity of the ball can De regulated, and the
team with the best catcher can throw the
swiftest ball. Only three balls will be thrown
over the plate, and the batter must strike or
run. Of course tbero will be more balls batted,
but this will require more skillful playing in
the field. Tbe game will not then go to the
nine whoso pitcher can the most befuddle the
umpire. My ball tosser will create a sensation
in baseball circles, and I expect to make big
money out ot it"
Road Projected Throngb Alaska From Spo
kane Falls.
"It is highly nrobable that a railway from
Spokane Falls "to Alaska will be constructed
within the next few years." said Mr. H. A.
Johnston, of New York, to a St Louis ?Io6e
Democrat reporter. "I am on my way home
from a business trip to Washington Territory,
and while out there my attention was called to
this project, and I spent considerable time
looking into it Tbe movement is in its in
fancy, but it has the backing of the wealthy
men of tho Northwest and of the people of
British Columbia, and I believe the road will
be built
"Tbe idea looks strange and impracticable at
tbe first glance, but as a matter of fact tbe ob
stacles to bo encountered in tbe construction
of such a line would not be as great as were
met with by the Central Pacific and tbe North
ern Pacific It is proposed to begin the rail
road at Spokane Falls, making that city the
southern and eastern terminus. Competent
engineers place the total cost at S130.00U.0O0.
jur. waiter Aiooerir, engineer lor the Uovern
ment of British Columbia, has examined tbe
proposed route, and believes tbat the road
could be built for less money per mile than the
Canadian Pacific, which be helped to carry
through,- and would prove very profitable."
A Jndce's Reply lo a Witness Who Perjured
Youth's Companion. '
A witness who had given his evidence in snch
a manner as to convince every one In court of
nis perjury, sua, at last, on Being cautioned by
theJudgei "My lord, yon may believe me or L
not but I have not stated a word tbat is false,
for I have been wedded to truth from my in-
VA nnt tntttri a wtt .. r
lancy." I
"Yes, air? ' replied Maule, ""but tbe question
If, "how lpmj luvre you bees a widower?'
How the Mixicolojrists Tickle Their
Patrons' Palates.
The Selectable Cobblers and Seductive
Draughts That
New Yobk, July 26. "Yes," said the
bartender, philosophically, as he piled six
glasses containing cocktails, one above the
other in an artistic but somewhat shaky
pyramid, "we are continually making
progress in the discovery of new and
fascinating palate-ticklers. Indeed there is
no limit to the variety a clever man can in
vent, if he has a knack that way. I once
knew a fellow who used to make it a study.
He would even dream out new drinks, just
as that musician fellow Tartini, dreamed
out the 'Devil's Sonata,' they say; I my
self," he added proudly, "have gotten up
two or three real beauties expressly for this
season's consumption. Like to try one?
Here, Jake a piece of ice and three thin
And with a graceful sweep of his right
arm. Artist P. H. Mclnerny, the pet of the
downtown merchants and members of the
Produce Exchange, and the High Priest of
uraer ot juixicologists in this city.
reached for a row of bottles behind the bar.
"This," he explained, as he mingled the
ingredients deftly, "is a 'Will-o'-the-wisp,'
a new drink, vintage of '89. It is quite
simple, being plain lemonade with a dash of
brandy and a puff of gin; then your ice
chopped fine and the whole shaken so.
Peculiar flavor, hasn't it? Something that
seems to escape you, so you can't tell ex
actly what it is like; yet yon like it An
other prime favorite which I have intro
duced is a giu-and-seltzer punch, frappe. It
is the best thing in the world for a hot day.
Iiots of men come in here and call for a
'marine cocktail,' an odd fancy of mine,
composed of sherry, vermouth and orange
bitters, with a spoonful of shaved ice.
"Did you ever hear of Sam Ward's great
summer drink? No? He used to come regu
larly every morning for it, and he gave the
recipe himself. Here it is: Haifa pony
double kimmel; half a pony cream; ice,
lemon and trimmings. Queer drink, isn't
it? About this time ot year I principally
have calls for fizzes and frappes, and we
make them in large quantities. They are
the most popular drinks in sultrv weather."
The really artistic drinking is not done at
the hotels in New York. It is in the cafes
that one finds the mixicologist at his best.
While some of the hotel bartenders are un
questionably artists, the average demand
does not call for a high grade of skill.
Whisky straight, beer, wine and the inevi
table cocktail predominate on the list, and
these any bellboy is capable of serving.
But in the cafes on Broadway and down
town, the trade in fancy drincs is tremen
dous, and a bartender must be both skillful
and ready-witted to comply with all the de
mands that are made upon' his inventive
powers. It is in these places that "drink as
a fine art" can be seen with all its infinite
The perfect bartender .'hides nothing;
everything is done in full view of the
audience, even to the slightest detail the
posing oi a berry, the floating of a twist of
lemon, or the mathematical construction of
a pyramid of cocktails, cobblers or pousse
cafes in a way that makes a layman dis
tracted and which he immediately proceeds
to disintegrate. It is art for art's sake
alone. At downtown Selmonico's, the
Cafe Bohemia or Ollagawalla Cafe on
Broadway, and a half-dozen places uptown,
these polished performances may be seen at
all hours.
"Amongthe bankers and brokers there's
a wide variety of tastes in the matter of
summer drinks," said Artist John Buben
helm, who presides in a maze of crystal and
silver in Delmonico's New street place.
"Many make little distinction on account of
the heat, but all seem to be very fond of
'Golden Slipper and 'Silver Fizz.' The
former is yellow of egg, whipped, yellow
chartreuse and Danziger goldwasser. The
silver fizz I make with the white ot an egg,
beaten up, gin, sugar and lemon juice. No,
I never have time to invent drinks, as some
oartenaers nave. These arc the ones most
in demand every summer."
At the New York Hotel, Bartender Joe
Murphy serves his patrons this season with
a "Boyal Hint," made like a small mint
julep, strained aud fizzed with carbonic
water. Tom Lynch, another well-known
artist says a plain fizz, composed of butter
milk, lime juice and soda, has the call this
summer. Patrick Murphy, who mixes
drinks for half the Stock Exchange, points
to the "Boston Cooler" ai his own crowning
triumph. It is half ginger ale, half sarsa
parilla. At tbe St. James Hotel, Billy
Ottman has made quiteahit with the "Bern
sen Cooler," which is composed of Tom gin,
soda, a piece of lemon peel, carbonized
water and shaved ice. At the Gilsey and
Fifth Avenue Hotels, Bartenders Buffer and
Grey are accounted very skillful compound
ers: yet they declare that fancy drinks are
in little demand among their patrons, aud
that plain whisky, or whisky and soda, have
the lead over allother beverages.
The Germans, when thev drink whisky,
have a way of treating it-that is somewhat
novel. Into a glass they squeeze an orange
and a lime, then comes a piece of ice and
two fingers of whisky, the whole served in a
"John Collins" glass. Their favorite drink
in summer, however, next to the omnipres
ent lager is Bhine wjne, well iced.
Sporting men have a nomenclature for
their tipples that is sometimes unique. At
the Brower House, a creat snorting ren.
dezvous, they call for a "horse," which is
virtually an old-fashioned cocktail, with
crnshed sugar. A "tip" is whisky and
milk, anda "PouehkeeDsie" is a trick drink.
intended to prevent the drinker from going
to the races that afternoon. It is an indis
criminate mixture of aOout a dozen of the
.strongest spirits, liquors and cordials, is
very seductive and has an almost immediate
effect upon the unlucky imbiber. The "raz-zle-dazze"
is another of the season's crea
tions of the same sort and is msde ol sherry,
Santa Cruz rum, cider, Tom gin, Curacao,
and ice. After drinking it, the sportsman
feels like buying the entire field and the
jockeys to boot
There is, of course, a vast army of irregu
lar drinkers who rush into any convenient
place in hot weather, and take promiscuous
ly whatever strikes their fancy, to allay
thirst These generally run to the lighter
draughts to be bad at the soda counter.
Phosphates, wine of coca, Moxie, lime juice,
almond chocolate (a delightfully cooling
drink), orgeat, lemon, peach, raspberry and
almost every conceivable flavor are called
for, egg lemonade and milk-shake, the latter
simpiy miiu iced and flavored with cheap
syrups, are the drinks of the street and side
walk, and are peddled by vendors on the
crowded thoroughfares.
The Star Theater Cafe bas been, for the
past 26 years, the resort of the prominent
actors. It is unpretentious, but decorated
with play bills, Americin and English,
dating as far back as 1807. Their latest
fancy drinks for the Thespians who pass the
Summer on the Bialto are the "Barn
Stormer," consisting of the yolk of an egg,
half a tablespoonful of sugar, half a pony of
kimmel, half a pony of sherry, a little
brandy, plenty oi ice, and all considerably
shaken np; and the "Walkine Ghost," com
pounded of half a tablespoonful of sugar,
half a pony ef chartreuse, a few squirts of
lemon juice, half s pony of Jamaica rum,
falain soda, trimmed with fruits, and iced.
An authority or summer drinks of the
most fragrant and hichlv decorated sattern
is "Count" Wilhfelni Schmidt who in known
hj- . i . . .
all over town as chief mixieologiitata noted
bar near tbe bridge entrance. The "count"
is, like Toriek, a fellow of infinite variety,
and his decoctions are calculated to bring
out the most delightful sensations of which
the cultured palate is capable. His chef
d'oeuvre is a curriculum of artistic drinks
for the 24 hours. He starts the well-regulated
society man with what he terms tbe
"Foundation." Into a small glass he drops
one fresh egg, the juice of half a lemon, a
teaspoonfnl of sugar, some shaved ice, a
dash of cslisava. a teasnoonfnl of old Tom
gin. a dash of orange bitters, and the same
of absinthe and vermouth. Shake two min
utes, strain into a high glass and fill the
balance with carbonic water and serve. The
second item in the curriculum is called the
"Life Prolonger," but it is omitted in sum
mer. The third is "Pansy Blossom," and
is made as follows: A glass with fine ice,
two dashes of gum, one-eighth of Bussiau
kimmal, same of absinthe, vino vermouth
and maraschino, the white of an egg; shake
all to the coldest point, strain into a fancy
glass and serve. The fourth and last on the
list is a "Southern Punch." He takes a
thin glass with the juice of a third of a
lemon, one spoonful of sugar, a quarter
glass of ice, one-third of St Julien, one
eighth of Jamaica rum, a mere dash of
brandy, the whole ornamented with fruit in
season and with a little ice cream on top,
and served with a straw.
For the ladies the "Count" has a special
tipple, as fellows: A large wine glass with
a spoonful of fine sugar, a squirt of seltzer,
one-quarter of sherry and some port wine, a
very light dash of brandy; fill the glass with
shaved ice, ornament with orange and pineap
ple, and top off with ice cream; serve with a
spoon, 'After partaking of this delightful
drink, thirst vanishes and the whole body
grows pleasantly coot It is a good appetizer
also. Served with tbe extreme politeness which
characterizes the "Count," It is pronounced by
the ladies the most fascinating of midsummer
refreshments. Many of tbe ladies, too, are
connoisseurs in the matter. On sultry summer
days tbe swarm to Halliard's, next door to the
Filth Avenue Hotel, and give their orders for
fancy drinks with the assurance of entire
familiarity with the subject Soda plain and
soda garnished with ice cream, or colored with
rnby cordial and topped with berries, soda with
absinthe, vermouth, or other liqueurs, chilled
with ice and sipped through straws; soda in
every form and flavor, from vanilla to pine
apple these are the favorites of tbe sex. It is
no uncommon thing to see a Devy of beautv, in
a sea of silk and furbelows, blocking tbe way to
tho soda fountain when the mercury goes be
yond tbe eighties. The chatter proceeds while
tbe drinking goes on, being only momentarily
interrupted as tbe imitation foliage on hats
and bonnets drops when tne lips touch the
classes in unison. Almost all the summer
drinkinc in nubile bv women and eirls is con
fined to innocent beverages of tbe character
George Murray, another skilled artist is
famed for his delicate summer flips and palate
ticklers. His sherry flip is daily consumed by
hundreds of business men at this season. He
takes half a glass of pale sherry, tbe same of
champagne cider, a spoonful of sugar, and
some fine Ice, all shaken and strained. He
makes a "whisky julep" as follows: Two
Angers of old rye or tiournon, suear mint half
a glass of fine shaved ice.decorated with straw
berries or a thin slice of orange, tbe whole
topped off with & mild dash of maraschino or
Western men, when tbey come to town, have
their own favorite bartenders to whom they go
for their mixed drinks. In the summer there
is a great variety. One of tbe latest is a "Cre
ole cocktail," which is composed of enracao,
vanilla, a dash of whisky, and vermouth and
fine ice. They are more partial to fiery cock
tails than Northerners, and seem tojlke them
best in hot weather.
Feigning Death to 8bts Herself nnd Her
Young Ones.
Brooklyn Eagle.j
Ex-Surrogate William D. Veeder tells a good
story of a recent incident on bis farm in Gnil
derland, Albany county. One of his workmen
had run Into earth a fox and ber cubs and
started in vigorously to dig them out After
about tour hours' bard work he came unon the
old fox. He caugbt her In the hole with a
forked stick across tbe neck, whacked ber over
the head with a shovel and pounded her until
all sienot life had gone. Then he hauled her
out by tbe heels and flung ber on tbe grass.
There she lay, eyes half closed, tongue hanging
out and tb all intents and purposes as bereft of
life as tbe spade on which be leaned and con
templated bis work. Then he turned to tbe
task of getting out the cubs. A few moments
after he paused in his shoveling and glanced
around, just in time to see tbe old fox tbat be
thought as dead as a smoked herring jump to
her feet and skip out over tbe knoll like streaks
of alternating electricity with a pressure of
3,000 volts behind it
When he recovered from his astonishment he
recalled tbe stories he had beard of how a fox
in a tight place will simulate death. He never
believed them before, bnt now be tbougbt
them all true. A littlo more digging and two
cubs were unearthed. "Well, I have broken
up the family, anyhow," be muttered, as be
brained the little foxes wjth the shovel and
taking them by the heels started forborne.
Just after davllcht the next moraine- he had
occasion to pass the spot on bis way to his daily
work. He was jnst in time to see tbat same
old fox limping oft along the hillside with two
cubs at ber heels. Instead of two she bad four
children, and, tbe henroosts of tbe ex-Surrogate
will once more be in danger when the swallows
nest again.
A Conversation That Shows Hott People's
Idea Differ on Thene Subjects.
Boston Coarier.I
"Ah! how do von do, Smith?"
"Pretty well, I thank you, Jones."
"Where do you keep yourself now! I haven't
seen you for an age. The boys used to be al
ways speaking about you, but I never hear them
mention your name now."
"No, I don't suppose you do."
"But you used to be one of the most pop
ular as well as one of the jolllest fellows among
"I know it When I used to go around with
the boys and spend my money with them and
neglect my wife and children, I was a splendid
fellow, but since I began to respect myself and
cire my wife and children tbe attention and
comforts to which they are entitled, and which
should never have been withdrawn from them,
I have lost my popularity among tbe boys, and
am now regarded as one of those 'mean cusses.'
Bnt I guess I can stand it,"
"1 guess you can," said Jones; "I never saw
you looking better in my life."
An Incorrigible PnplI Offers Money to His
Teacher to Stop Talking.
Boston Courier.!
When a teacher was endeavoring to impress
upon a class of newsboys the beauty of right
eousness, and to give them some sort ot a
leaning toward the paths of decency, sobriety
and godlmess,an impudent saucy-faced young
ster, known among bis companions as "Bully
Sam," leaned forward, and holding out to her a
battered nickel, which bad tbe general ap
pearance of having been run over by a horse
car, observed:
"I say now, I'll eivo you that to stop."
It may bo judged how much effect tbe lesson
had after that
A Simple and Always Available Remedy
far the Disease.
New York Evening World.1 .
A physician, in conversation with a reporter,
made this statement: "When I have a patient
who is subject to cramp I alwaps advise him to
provide himself with a strong cord. Along
garter will oo if nothing else is handy. When
the cramp comes on take tbe cord, wind it
around the leg over tbe place that is cramped,
and take an end in each hand and give it a sharp
pull, one that will hurt a little. Instantly the
cramp will cease, and tbe sufferer can go to bed
assured it will not come on again that night
This is an effective remedy,' he assured the
reporter, "and if carried out by afflicted per
sons many a dollar would be saved In phy
sicians' fees."
Wise Heads on Yonng bhoulders.
Enterprise (Ean.) Independent
One of our Sunday school teachers on a recent
occasion told her pupils that when they put
tbeir pennies In the contribution box she want
ed each one to repeat a Bible verse suitable for
tbe occasion. Tbe first boy dropped in a cent
saying: "The Lord loveih a cheerful giver."
The nextboy dropped bis cent iuto tbe box,
saying: "He that glveth to the poor lendeth to
the Lord." The third and youngest boy dropped
bis penny, saying: "A fool and his money are
soon parted."
No Files on His Hogs.
Blddeford Journal, i
The society with the long name has a dis
ciple in Augusta who dispenses the milk of
human kindness to animals in a way and man
ner that must afford delight to the spirit of the
late Mr. Bergb. if It ever visits these mortal
shores. Hnbas placed In his pig pen a number
ot sheets of sticky fly-paper to divert tbe at
tention of the winged miscreants from the un
protected backs ef tbeir bogsbJfs,
iwarrrxx ron thi dispatch.!
ONE of the most marked and one of the most
hopeful signs of the times is the drawing to
gether of the different denominations of Chris
tians. And this without any less of denomina
tional power or interest Tbe young men and
women who are banded together in the Chris
tian associations and societies of Christian En
deavor which cobweb tbe continent like tbeir
elders who are connected with bodies like the
Evangelical Alliance, are devoted Methodists,
Baptists, Presbyterians, Congregationalists,
Lutherans, Episcopalians as much attached
as ever they were. Yet now they have been
broadened. They have become cosmopolitan.
Christian is recognized as being more than any,
than all, other designations. And Christians
are recognized in folds outside our own special
one. This is an enormous gam.
In England most of tbe land is held by great
proprietors: and yet there are not lacking what
are called common plats of ground which are
open to alt So the soil of Curistlanity ts par
celed out among tbe great denominational
proprietors; but a common-ground is not lack
ing whereupon we may all set our feet and clasp
bands in brotherhood and sisterhood.
Denominationatism is all right, provided it be
kept within tbe Umlu of chanty. A generous
rivalry does no barm tbe rivalry of faith and
good works. Moreover, each denomination
sets forth in a distinctive way some feature of
tbe spherical truth. No one bas it all, but each
typifies some more or less essential phrase of it
And it is only by correlating and dove-tailing
these representative denominations tbat we get
the round truth the whole truth. Troth is a
wheel, of which the respective denominations
are the spokes. One spoke does not make a
wbeel; it takes all. The vartousspokes are apt
to forget their mutual dependence, and to set
np as being each one the entire wheel. Let us
be thankful for any tendency the othetway.
The Force of Heredity.
In tbe International Sunday School lesson for
to-day we hear the Israelites clamoring for a
King. Samuel, one ot the most upright of
men, is rejected as a judge, and the faults of
bis children are flung in his face: "Thy sons
walk not in thy ways." Here, as some one has
said, is both a compliment and a stab tbe
magistrate is praised at the expense ot the
As genius is not hereditary, so neither is
piety. Some of tbe best of fathers have bad
some ot the worst of sons; as witness Ell and
Samuel and David, not to go outside of Biblical
Probably these good men were too much
occupied with the administration of public
affairs to glvo what time and attention were
needful to tbe training their children. But can
this be justified? Has any one a right to neg
lect his own in order to attend to another's to
overlook a near for a more remote duty?
Of course, there are exceptions. But as a
rule, boys and girls turn out as might be ex
pected. Training and environments are half
omnipotent It is probable that the child takes
lasting form before reaching the age of 10
years all that comes after is confirmatory!
What an Inducement is here to early faithful
ness in the honse and in tbe school.
It is more than probable tbat the wayward
ness of his family counteracted the godly ef
forts of Samuel, and precipitated the change
from theocracy to monarchy. Thus the bad
sons of good fathers pnll down what tbeir pa
rents would build up. They illustrate the pa
rental precepts and example, as tbe Hebrew is
read backward.
A Day With Spargean.
The Rev. T. L. Cujler. D. D.. writes as fol
lows from across the water: During every
visit to London it bas been my privilege to pass
a Saturday afternoon with Mr. Spurgeon. for
that is his holiday. Accordingly, I drove down
to bis beautiful villa of "Westwood," near
Sydenham Crystal Palace. A "Damsel
Rhoda" at tbe porter's lodge operated tbe gate,
and we passed up a shaded avenue to the house.
It is a spacious mansion, embosomed in foliage
and flowers and verdant lawns; and this lovely
home, with its surrounding drives, is his one
luxury and recreation. He attends no
dinner parties or junketings of any kind.
juiiis in no puduc amusements, out gives him
self entirely to his home, his books and his pul
pit On Sunday mornings he drives in six
miles to bis Tabernacle, preaches twice; he
conducts tbe cburch prayer meeting on Mon
day evenings, and lectures to two or three
thousand people on Thursday evening. He
gave us a very racy account of bis last prayer
meeting, which in freedom of speeeh and fer
vency of devotion would be a model for all our
prayer meetings; a halt a dozen persons were
struggling at once to "get tho floor," and no
prayer lasted more than a minute.
We found Mr. Spuntenn as stout as genial,
as unique and as merry-hearted as ever. He
took us ont through his lovely garden and
lawn, and then through a gate Into bis "farm."
His own grounds cover 12 acres, and he rents
20 acres more for farming purposus. His good
wife keeps a dozen cows, and the proceeds of
her dairy support a city missionary. Wo
strolled off into a meadow where the mowers
were busy in hay-making, and throwing our-
BciTca uuwii on & pue ot. iragrantuay, we played
boy and told stories. It was a Jolly little panal
liance," in which three denominations were
represented, and we should have been glad to
have invited tho Archbishon of Ciniarhnrr
whose wooded park was in full sight of us, to J
cuuio utw buu juia oar symposium. AS 1
looked at Mr. Spurgeon, in bis playful boyish
ness, it was not easy to believe that our merry
champion was the most exttaordinary preacher
of modern times the wonderful herald of sal
vation, whose trnmpets of truth are heard
throughout all lands.
The Church and the Theater.
It is the dnty of the clergy to give instruc
tion to the public upon all questions ot a moral
or religious character. They are the accredited
exponents of tbe conduct of life. Yet either
through carelessness oy cowardice, they habit
ually "remember to forget" certain questions
relating to practical ethics which vitally con
cern their congregations and the entire com
munity. sIfe.
One of these ignored issues is thTTof attend
ing the theater. It would be safe to say tbat
halt of tbe younger people in every congrega
tion in tbis city are theater-goers. Many of
these have been trained to believe tbis habit
pernicious. Tbey go against tbeir conscience.
Meantime, throughout the community there is
a marked revival of dramatic interest. Actors
and actresses are no longer tabooed in tbe old
iasnion. i rageaians use uoota and Irving ate
received and honored everywhere.
Now, what is to be done in tbis matter; Is
the dramatic revival wrong? Are those church
goers, who are also theater-goers, inconsistent
Christians, worthy of discipline? Surely, the
clergy ought not to be dumb dogs, afraid to
"speak" in answer to such inquiries. It the
harm lies in tbe wrong time or the wrong de
gree or tbe wrong place, are not the accepted
teachers of morals under obligation to declare
this? Guizotused to say that "tbe test of
civilization Is the ability to discriminate." Who
shall civilize tbe community np to this point if
the clergy refuse to do so? When men and
women act against their conscience (even
against a mistaken conscience) the result is de
moralizing. If the old prejudice against tbe
drama was a mere prejudice: if the wrong in
tbis regard is one of indiscrimination and not
a wrong per se: should not tbe clergy say so
plainly, and thus remove the ban under which
consciences are hurt on the one hand and a
whole profession is morally outlawed on tbe
other band?
What has been said of tbe drama applies
equally to dancing and card playing. Tbt&en
tlre question of recreation needs the attention
of tbe pulpit
Thoughts for tbe Sabbath.
The first discourse ever preached had a lie
for its text and made converts of half its hear
ers. Joteph Cook.
FiiATTXBY, like false money, impoverishes
those who receive It voiller.
v The world Is wide
In time and tide
And God is guide
bo do not hurry.
Tbat man Is blest
Who does bis best
And leaves tbe rest
Then do not worry.
Dr. C. P. Deem.
I CAN understand people's loslsg by trusting
too little to God, but I cannot understand any
one's losing by trusting Him too much.
Charlet Kingtley
To run a few steps will not get a man heated;
bnt walking an hour may: so. though a sadden
occasional tbougbt of heaven will not raise our
affections to any spiritual heat yet meditation
can continue our thought and lengthen our
walk till our hearts grow warmer. Baxter.
On, blessed Ciyitas Dei I The ransomed shall
see it with greater joy than filled the way-worn,
war-worn crusaders when at last they looked on
the city wbicb had drawn them from afar, and
shouted: Jerusalem I Jerusalem I Donald
8CBXZ.Y as waters meet and rest in low val
leys, so do God's graces in lowly hearts. Trapp.
Some talk by the pound and live by tbe
ouncc;,tbey have heaven at their tongue's end
and tbe world at their lingers' end. Selected.
SraCB there are abont 6,000,000 Christians
committed to Christian laziness, it Is well that
there should be 600,000 committed to Christian
We may not have mounted into wealth, bnt
A Collection of MmatiCul Nuts for
Home CracMng.
Addreu communication for IMt department
to E. R. Chadbouen. LetvUton, Maine.
Io was dead as any door nan.
Like poor Scrooge of old In Dickens' tale.
The cause of bis death was very obscure.
But tbe coroner said he was sartin sure
To find it out If he set long enough.
Which be meant to do. It was rather rough
On tbe good men and true to be kept so long.
But they sought with a will to find out the)
Yet their progress was such that I doubt bnt
by chance
Tbey bad made to tbis day one inch of ad
vance:. Next door to their place was a druggist's shop.
And a lad, less Intent on errand than top.
Put his bead, by mistake, In tbe coroner's
And called, for a drug all had heard of be
fore. "Why. bleu me I ye don't say 1 Did he die of
Cried the qnlck-wltted one whom the others
called Pat
"Of what J" cried his mates. "Do tell if yott .
And let us go home, for we're tired out man I"
"Why. didn't you hear the gossoon, what he
One would think ye had niver an ear to yer
It agrees with the ividence, sound slnse and
We'll rinder tbe verdict and get home la
Happt Thought.
Escaping from "A tbUANX'S pzjt,"
A boy went off a-boating;
He was drowned, bis body found,
"Upon the surface floating."
A grocer's wagon broke down while being;
driven across a narrow stream. The driver,
finding it impossible to either advance or re
cede, cast about for a means of unloading the
wagon. He found that he could reach one
bank of tho stream by jumping upon a small
rock which stood about half way between the
wagon and tbe shore, and which could be used
as a stepping stone. From here be could step
to a landing place on the shore. Tbe load con
sisted of a bag of potatoes, a bag of tomatoes,
some eggs and some strawberries. Now,
tbo wagon, tbe stone in the stream,
and the landing place itself were so
narrow tbat no two of tbe packages
could be placed side by side; It was neces
sary to place tbem one upon the other. Bnt if
tbe potatoes bad been placed on either of tha
otber articles they would have crushed them;
tbe tomatoes could be placed upon tbe pota
toes, but no: ou the eggs or strawberries; tha
eggs could be placed on either the potatoes or
tomatoes, but not on the strawberries, while
the strawberries were light enough to be
placed on any of the other articles. In this
wagon tbey were arranged in the following
order, beginning at the bottom- L potatoes; 2, '
tomatoes; 3, eggs; 4, strawberries. The grocer's
bov could lift only one of the packages at s
time; how did he manage to transfer them to
the landing place in tbe same order as they
were in tbe wagon ? J. II. Fezadix.
Said mother to Benny, "If now you will take
To poor Uncle Peter tbis fine johnny-cake.
This bit of fresh meat these potatoes and
And what he's so fond of this dish of nice
Many first he will give you, and vou will know
The pleasure of second as homeward you go.
When the wAoIe comes again, may It find you,
my boy,
At the pleasant home-gathering, with heart
full of joy."
678. numerical
The dark 2, 10, 11, 12 harbors a voice of plain
tive tone.
9, 2, 6 is this unseen spirit who makes request
for one unknown?
"1, 2, 3, 5," the sad one says, "i, 7, S, 8 (in purse
or friends)
"1, 10, 1L 12," and then a sobbing moan the
pleading ends.
Of all tbe voices of the night which irritate, or
sooth, or thrill,
None has so eerie a refrain as sends tbe all
from yonder hill.
BrrTES Sweet.
I A letter. 2 A trick. 3 Ghosts, A dig
nity or degree of honor next below a baron.
S An instrument for exhibiting the transversa
vibration of cords. 6 Gave fobs). 7 A kind of
vessel. 8 To spread or turn as new-mowa
grass. 9 A letter. Olivier Twist.
All tbe laws of our great nation.
Every book, both great and small.
Even tbe Fresidental message
I constitute tbem all.
The libel and the forgery.
The sermon and the prayer.
The Constitution of our land.
In each I claim a share.
lam composed of many parts.
These parts have many a form;
They are oft in different colors seen.
When hotels or stores they adorn
In earliest youth I was given to you.
You were taught that I was wise:
I may seldom in your sight appear.
Though I'm now before your eyes.
681. BEUUS.
O. ye insatiate, cankering cares.
Stay, stay your blighting coarse!
Ye eat away tbe human heart
And work without remorse.
Belle Bubdett.
667. Spear, pears, ear, reaps, pea, sear, eras,
are, ape, spar, sea.
60S. Forgetting insolate. (For getting in so
660. Clout lout, out
8 E A R A T
67L "G" changes "lass" to "glass."
Tbe Place to be Cheated.
Youths' Companion.
Tbe shoemaker hung out a new sign, and
then wondered what passers-by found so amus
ing. His sign ran as follows: "Don't go else
where to be cheated. Walk in here."
Sick Headache
IS a complaint from which many suffer
and few are entirely free. Its causa
is indigestion and a sluggish liver, tho
cure for which is readily found in tho
nse of Ayer's Pills.
" I have found that for sick headache,
caused by a disordcred'eondition of the
stomach, Ayer's Pills are the most re
liable remedy." Samuel C. Bradbnm,
Worthington, Mass.
"After the nse of Ayer's Pills for
many years, in my practice and family,
I am -justified in saying that they are an
excellent cathartic and liver medicine
sustaining all the claims made for them.r
W. A. Westfall, M. D., V. P. Austin
& N. W. Railway Co., Burnet, Texas.
"Ayer's Pills are the best medicine
known to me for regulating the bowels,
and for all diseases caused by a dis
ordered stomach and liver. I suffered
for over three years from headache, in
digestion, and constipation. I bad no
appetite and was weak and nervous
most of the time. By using three boxes
of Ayer's Pills, and at the same time
dieting myself, I was completely cured."
Philip Lockwood.Topeka, Kansas.
" I was troubled for years with Indi
gestion, constipation, and headache. A
few boxes of Ayer's Pills, used in small
daily doses, restored me to health.
They are prompt and effective. W.H.
Strout, Meadvflle, Pa.
Ayer's Pills,
rsoABXD jrr
Dr. J. C. Ayer & Co., Lowell, Mat.' y
Bold bj all DrntcttU sad Petiea la ami .
k?g&&f :

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