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VOL. XI. NO. 52 POLITICAL POT=PIE W. H. Clark has been turned down good and hard for the deputy internal revenue collectorship at this place and Thomas Payne is to remain in the position indefi- nitely. "Clarky" was turned down despite the fact that he had the promise from Sen ator Piles himself, so goes the story, that another job would be found for Payne and he, Clark, would be given the job the Ist day of May. The above promise, Clarky declares, was made to him in the presence of all of the war horses of the "South district" and in the presence of D. B. Crocker, internal reve nue collector of this district, who assented to the change. The first of May has come and gone and still Clarky is doing chores on his farm over on Vashon island, and when seen one day this week in consultation with the "big four" from the south end he was in no mood to discuss the situation, but hur riedly remarked: "There would come a reckoning of affairs some sweet day, by and by." # * # Senator Piles' promise to his King county faithful that there would be a clean sweep of the federal office holders throughout the state and those who worked for his election would be rewarded with those appointments, have fallen way short of the mark and a re count of some of the disappointments that has been the lot of Senator Piles in this con nection would not be amiss. Postmaster Stewart's confirmation was not held up as Mr. Piles directed the United States senate and the president to do by telegraph the day he was elected United States senator, and then and there State Senator Tucker lost a $4,000 job, which can be said to be disap pointment No. 1 for the junior senator of Washington. # # # Joseph B. Lindsley, the Spokane high flyer, was sacredly promised the United States attorneyship of the new district, if he and his fellow members would stand pat for Sweeney and shift to Piles when wanted, which they not only agreed to do, but de livered the goods, but Lindsley did not get the job and is as sore as a ducked witch, which constitutes disappointment No. 2 for the junior senator from Washington. State Senator Ilutson was to be deputy United States attorney under Lindsley, if he too would stand pat as did Lindsley, which he did, but the attorney general had not been consulted, and when the proposition was presented to him it took him but a sec ond to inform all concerned "there was not going to be any core," in other words no deputy would be allowed for the district. It would not be out of place to style this disappointment No. 3 for the junior senator from Washington. * * # After advising the faithful to select their respective federal positions W. 11. Clark was first to announce his wants and the position SEATTLE, WASHINGTON, FRIDAY, MAY 26 ; 1905 held by Thomas Payne was his choice. This was promised him at a pow-wow and Payne was to have a big man's job. Nothing of that nature, however, turned up for Payne and so he was compelled to hold on to what he had and Clarky was put off with another big promise if something turned up, it would, surely be his. To a man up a tree this surely looks just like disappointment No. 4 for the junior senator from Washington. Frank A. Twichell, who bled and died for "Sam Piles," decided he wanted the office which Dr. Allen P. Mitten has filled for the past eight years, deputy customs collector at Seattle. Nothing was more pleasing to his senatorship, for Mitten was a John L. Wilson man and he first of all had to walk the plank. In their enthusiasm, however, they overlooked the fact that Doc. Mitten's job had been put under civil service and to oust him charges had to be filed and sus tained before the department. There was no .hope of taking care of Twichell in this connection and after carefully going over the situation all agreed another sad defeat had to be credited to the "politician" and no confidence is betrayed in styling this disap pointment No. 5 for the junior senator from Washington. # # # LB. Knickerbocker, the hero of a hun dred hard fought political battles^thought^ Fred A. Wing had been United States as sayer quite long enough (there are others) and he selected that office as his reward for shouting Sam Piles, and it was promised him without hesitancy, as Wing was a bit tainted with Wilsonism, but T. Roosevelt, the mighty hunter, did not seem to be able to find an excuse for making the change, hunt as dili gently as he might, and the news soon came from the national government there would be no change at the assay office in Seattle for the present. If this is not disappoint ment No. 6 for the junior senator from Wash ington then it comes dangerously near it. Now, there is Jesse A. Frye, a Foster ap pointee, holding the United States district attorneyship, one of us is entitled to the place and the senator agreed, and he then and there announced that the man he had selected for the place was Potter Charles Sul livan, and the change would be made in May or June. Again the powers that be at Wash ington City intervened and now the retiring of Frye has been indefinitely postponed. From a Sullivan standpoint this would ap pear to be disappointment No. 7 for the junior senator from Washington. If a United States senator is not elected to hunt jobs both at the capital of the nation and the capital of the state for his henchmen then what else is he good for ? John Wood ing therefore had himself slated by the big chief for state dairy commissioner, and Gov. Mead was given instructions to make the ap pointment. The governor, however, fell off into a dreaming state and in that condition he named L. Davies of Lincoln county for the place and Wooding and the big chief * # # # # # # * # PRICE FIVE CENTS now realize and are willing to admit that disappointment No. 8 for the junior senator from Washington has been thrown into his wigwam. * # # Though it all but broke my heart I was forced to turn Plinny Allen down for Twichell, but I have instructed "my mem bers of the legislature" to pass a new state printing bill and this place I will give to Plin, which will be worth more to him than going to the legislature. The bill was passed, but again one Albert E. Mead got mixed in his instructions and C. W. Gorham was named instead of Plin. There is no disguis ing the fact that this constitutes disappoint ment No. 9 for the junior senator from Washington. * # # Because Congressman Humphrey refused to become a party to the parceling out of jobs over which he had no control immediate political extermination was put on cold stor age for him and the "new senator" gave notice that "one Will E. Humphrey would be denounced from every political rostrum in King county." The aftermath of this threat is a complete backdown and Hum phrey is to be let severely alone. We may be mistaken, but it occurs to us that we would not be far wrong in styling this dis appointment No. 10 for the junior semitor from Washington. # # * We all put our shoulders to the wheel and by our united efforts succeeded in elect ing you to the United States senate, the highest office in the gift of the citizens of any state, and we feel that you should not now be active in opposing what we consider a public policy, comes from Mr. Piles' home guard, the Beacon Hill Club. "If lamto be criticised and be made the victim of char- acter assassins and not be allowed to practice my chosen profession as suits me best, then I will move away," retorts the senator. What, move away from dear old Seattle and become a resident of Tacoma or Everett — sacrilige, treachery, burning shame. What a setback for the Seattle spirit that ex pended thousands of dollars in making it possible for Seattle to have a senator. Are we not justified in pronouncing this disap pointment No. 11 for the junior senator from Washington? * * * And now after encountering so many crushing disappointments one is reminded of the repeated boasts of the junior senator from Washington soon after he was elected to the effect that he would remain a member of the senate for "twenty-four years," so well had he fortified himself in the political arena. If in the face of so many rebuffs he is able to even succeed himself some great political hedging on his part must be done and should he fail in that one and all must agree with the Pie-maker that it would be disappointment No. 12 for the junior senator from Washington and of all this would prove the disappointment of disappointments.