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The Jeffersonian. [volume] (Stroudsburg, Pa.) 1853-1911, August 25, 1853, Image 1

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Srootcb to jjolitics, iCifcvatuve, gvirultiut, Science, iltovalitw, nnb cncral intelligence.
VOL. 13.
STROUDSBUEG, MONROE COUNTY, PA. AUGUST 25, 1353,
NO. 44.
Published by Theodore Scliacti
TERMS Two dollars per annum in advance Two
dollars and u quarter, half yearly And if not paid be
fore the end of the year, Two dollars and a half.
No papers discontinued until all arrearages are paid,
except hi the option of the Editor.
ID Advertisements not exceeding one square (ten
lines) will be inserted three weeks lor one dollar, and
twenty-five tents for every subsequent insertion. The
charge for one and three insertions the same. A liber
al discount made to yearly advertisers.
IT7 All letters addressed to the Editor must be postpaid.
JOB PBINTISG.
Having n general assortment of large, elegant, plain
and ornamental Type, we are prepared
to execute every description of
Cards, Circulars, llill Heads, Notes, Rlank Receipts
Justices, Legal and other Blanks, Pamphlets, &c.
printed with neatness and despatch, on reasonable
terms,
AT THE OFFICE OF
THE JEFFJERSOfflAtf.
What They Want.
BY BUND.
The women, precious little souls!
How can we help to love 'em?
But how it makes their 'dander riz'
To see us men above 'em!
They can't content themselves to live,
Amidst the pots and kettles,
And waste their schemey, freaky .bfainp,
To keep us stuffed with vituals.
They ache to take the scythe and plow,
And leave us with the dishes
They'd realy like to get out doors,
And then they'd wear the b b (what
d'ye call 'em?)
ily! what a figure they would cut
Ajclcarin up' and loggin',
4 A raisin barns' and 'carryin brick'
And mortar in the bargain.
How strong their tender limbs would be!
How sinewy and cordy!
What rough and scaly hands they'd have!
How tough they'd grow and hardy!
And how they'd love to take their axe,
And march into the forest, '
Some gloomy, cold December day,
When the thermometer stands about five
degrees below zero, and keep their blood in
circulation by chopping all day long in the
enow about knee-deep, and then to come home
at night and find supper where it was in the
morning and their better-half eff visiting a
mong the neighbors. What a luxury!
A California correspondent of the N. Y.
Tribune, says:'Nevado is truely a Cali
fornia village, built in and on a gold
mine. Every bushel of earth, within a
mile, contains gold. The sweepings of
the street yield eight or ten dollars per
day to those that wash them."
I. 0. OF 0. P. Wm Curtis, Grand
Secretary ,has issued the following annual
report of the Lodges in this State for the
year ending June 30th? 1853 The initia
tions numbered 4,052; rejections, 423 ;
admitted on card, 415 ; withdrawn by
card, 740 ; re-instatements, 270 ; suspen
sions, 2,366 ; expulsions, 70 ; deaths, 309;
Passed Grands, 4,794 ; number of mem
bers in this State, 44,122 ; total receipts,
S173,254 81 ; 'number of members re
lieved, 5,04, to the amount of S72,107
72 ; widowed families relieved 796, to the
amonnt of S3,886 66 ; members hurried,
282 jiexpenses for burying the dead, $14,
052, 62 ; paid for education of orphans,
$338 78; total expenditures, $91,380 81.
The Grand Lodge of Pennsylvania is
composed of 4,794 members, and has un
der its jurisdiction 478 Lodges.
A Singular Case.
A Miss Read, of West Boylstown,
took chloroform a few days ago for thc
purpose of having a tooth extracted, Ehe
was attaked with a severe pain in the
head. Her friends supposing her dead,
laid her out for burial, and began to pre
pare for the funeral ceremonies; but their
grief was unexpectedly turned to joy and
astonishment, on finding that the sup
posed dead began to revive! She event
ually recovered the full possession of her
faculties; but what is still most singular
in her case, as we are told, she suffers
violent pains in the head as regularly as
evening approaches, and at length, and a
bout the same hour each night, falls into
a swoon very similar to that which in the
first instance was supposed to have been
the sleep of death. This case certainly
presents a most remarkable escape from
premature burial. Worcester Transcript.
During a trial in a Massachusetts Court
a young lad who was called as a witness,
was asked if he knew what was the obli
gation of an oath, and where he would go
ft be told a lie, He said he supposed
'ho would 9 where all the lawyers
5Ycni,"
An industrious tradesman, having ta
ken a now apprentice, awoke him tho first
morning at a very early hour, by calling
out tha't the family were sitting down to
.the table. "Thank you," said the boy,
turning over for a new napthank you ;
but I never eat anything during thc
night."
Speaking of the revolution in China,
a co-temporary says, 'the great tea ket
tle is boiling.'
From the Cincinnati Gazette.
What the French Wear,
AND HOW THEY WEAR IT.
The French regard the American peo
Til ft 111 mneli tfift R.nno lirrlir. na tliov rln
the "outside barbarians" of the far-off
islands of the sea; for they assert that
they find an equally good market with' " , of his life, five wive?, and, at the time of
each for the sale of rich and gaudy ar. , their own, which, by their great travel- bis doaUl as the father of forty-seven
tides of manufacture. Thus a large pro- 1US propensities, would soon become u-lohildren! Whi,e Pesiding in pennSylva
portion of the silk looms of Lyons are raal. It is time that the American . ear the old Bedstone Fort, hw wife
constantly employed in the manufacture PeoPle ceasd ruIcrazy after European birth tQ fiv(J cbil(lren in elevcn
of gaudy tissues for the North American ' f?slll?n3' Ifc " wolJ to remember too njonths. This extraordinary man, when
market: while the finest and most costly at few French coats are made well; it Jn his 0Qe hunbrod and fourtb e mow.
styles of the cloths and cassimeres of JS1-
1 T 1 K-A n.l,n.n r.. !. n
UUU1 UUU UUU SU 1 uauj a. ,
customer as the United States. The Paris
merchant sometimes complains when aak.
ed for a fine piece of goods, in which his
stook is dehcient, that all those styles arelr ,
carried off at higher prices than he can jTJ 13 a Sre,at aurdjty for a sensible peo-
afford to cive, by tho American imnort
ing agents. When an American, on en
tering a tailoring establishment in Paris,
announces, in reply to tho polite interro
gatory which is sometimes put to him,
tho name of his country, he is very apt
to be saluted with a broader smile and a i
greater convexity of the spine than the' "T Ban J ""er Ppie- xj win
Citizens of other countries, followed by the j to be fl? onlf the sile f honnet
remark, "Then you want to see the best! an affclclf2.in wTluch ho Freu1ch certaiuly
goods we've got." The moral conveyed ,c"el Th 1L0Innfc3 arTe always tasty
by these facts should not be forgotten. and P1(luan ' Thc Frencb m d,0 nofc
The fact is ,we are a nation of envious, 1 P.uf so.uc 1luoney on. &cir backs, as
money-making spendthrifts, and in tho,f,ltlier EnSsh or American women, but
absence of titles, and those class distinc
tions universally recognised in Europe,
enrlflnvmir. bv n-andv disnlftr fn rklnnrt
ourselves in advance of each other in thed,rf 3 admirably, and much more reason-
world's appreciation. Our country offers
the curious anomaly of possessing more
aristocrats, and at the same time more
republicans, than any nation in existence,
It is tho aristocracy of broad-cloth,
brown free-stone fronts and fast horses.
Prom the fct that America drives its
fashions from Paris, one naturally ar
rives here with the idea that he will see
at once in the streets of the city the best
dressed people in the world. He is quite
astonished to find how far he has been
deceived. He sees much, very much less
of fine goods in the street, particularly
on tne men, and ne sees a mucn
greater
variety of style, both in London and in
Paris, than in the large American cities.
The latest style is confined to a very few
persons comparatively few in compari
son to the population, and few in compar
ison to thc number of persons who con
form to the changes of fashion in the large
cities of America. Outside of that limi
ted number one could not decide what
was the reigning style, they are so diver
sified. One cause of this deversity is, that
no people pay so much attention to con
trasts of person as the French; while an
other very powerful one is, that money is
less equally distributed than with ue,and
fewer persons can afford to conform to
the frequent changes of fashion. But
frequent changes must take place in
Prance; it is a national characteristic,
, which is ground so deep into a French
man's existence, that its influence runs
through every action of his life, to be
ar-
rested onlv at his religion, and
even to
that he holds not too tenaciously. So j
that, m some measure to compensate for
the frequent change which is required,
the French have acquired the habit of
wearing a coarser quality of cloth than
that which their manufacturers send to
our country. The Emperor of France
wears evory day coarser cloth than nine
tenths of the "down-town" clerks of the
American cities.
In Paris, however, every one but the
TTftrl'mfin nn rrn cm A of liic wnflr lrtnlro nnlf
lam inclined to believe that it is thjThe young women are units in society.
, ., i i t -
general neat appearance which has m-i,
j .a x. i. xi.: ri.
ions from Paris
and appropriateness
not equal the English or American mod-
York or London man in the streets of '
Paris by his back. The Parisians
from home.
Another
follow the French style is, that the French
neonle oarrv their clothes with such
people carry their clothes with such in
finite grace, giving to the most unnatural
and out-of-taste styles an easy elegance
that our- more awkward people cannot
approach in any stjde which they may
choose to adopt. It is rare to see a
French fop, that is, what we understand
by. a fop. There are plenty of men who
pay as much attention to their clothes as
with us, but their manner, when carrying
n . i 'state occassions, are always dressed piain
Certainly, for elegance , 7 . , . J , ... J
. the French Stvlcs do ! " anu me pcopio iu.
i iiULiuiiv nun r i.iiiiii mi sri" .t. in ; it .- u;: i-k iii
1 know whether he is English or American, ibe hoPed that th. exa,Te f ? c mpCr
! provided he be a fresh arrival, and earr home a11 acknowledge to be the per
' riM wit.li liim tfen ninfi, , wf.fection of a gentleman in his dress, will
them, don't advertise their thoughts. It died and sixty pairs of woman's spring
is amusing to look at our very young heeled shoes working ten hours. Steele
men when they get on their first Paris pegging 82 pairs, and Bunker 78 pairs;
out fit: a thing which soon takes place, i Steele's being at the rate of 84-5 pairs;
unfortunately for them, for the longer
man stays nere, tue more simply iiemmuie, ana jjuutcer 4-0 pairs per nour,
dresses. I do think the most ludicrous or more than 34 pegs per minute to
sighta man can see in Paris, is a freshly 'gether driving 41,920 pegs iu ten hours,
arrived boy-aristocrat trying to be grace-.The last part of the work was performed
ful in one of Dusautoy's best outfits for
our genuine "blood
)d" won't go to ahop
that is not patronis
sed by the JUtnperor.
, ...I-
If American fathers would give their sons
whom they send here, one or two good
suits, and then limit thc amount of sup-
plies at "my bankers," until through the
medium of their eyes they had learned a
little good sense, they would confer a fa-l
vour on thc boy and their purse at the
same time.
Although
I have been here
a year, and h
have grown perfectly accus-
ijressj a well-mad6 American
tomcd to be q
suit, (American made clothes are always J
modified from the French.) whenever Ij
.t L... , ., " it j
encounter it still strikes me as the most
ueuuuiui, iue mobt reobonaum, auu ui
most tasteful; and there is no reason why
the American people, who lead in so many
juuuSai uuu u
l Vr 5 aV Vt T J?
the present moment,1
ill.. ikl)
ir thft P I'll'M f i inf e r rt r r AAtffM It 1
"'"H " " uu ,
as these, with the sincerity and gravity
which our people do.
The women of Paris dress with much
more taste, generally, than the men.
They study contrasts more, and under
stand that part of the dressing better per-
i ii -it i- mi
tnoy arrange it to better advantage.
They are rather too fond of velvet trim
mings and iewerlv; but otherwise thev
ably than the men. Two st7les, however,
now worn by the ban ton in Paris, I think
will find little favour in America. They
are the manteau, called Talmas, and a
kind of silk for dresses with changeable,
fanciful-shaped stripes running around
the skirts in place of flounces, generally
of a light brick-dust colour on black silk.
The bonnets are round , very small, and
reach forward only to the middle of the
head somewhere in the region of vener
ation. Like tho men, the women carry
themselves so gracefully that they seem
not conscious of it when extravagantly
dressed.
A habit prevails in France in regard
to the dress of young unmarried ladies
in thc wealtheir classes, so entirely dif
ferent from our own system that it is
worthy of mention. All young ladies,
till the day of their marriage, must dress
plainly and cheaply; they must not, even
in company, wear jewelry, flounces or
ribbons to any extent. The mother may
carry into company ten times the value
that her daughter can. And it is aston
ishing how the old women of Franco do
dress. One might very well take their
modestly-dressed daughters at their side
for a family instructress or a favorite ser
vant. Not only must the daughters dress
plainly and modestly, but they must never
move out of sight of their mothers or
chaperones, nor speak to a gentleman
without permission, until they are mar
ried; then custom allows4.hem to make
up for lost time, and so far as I have been
able to observe, they do make it up with
a VCDSeancc
. The study of the fashions
is very apt to beeorae at once a mania
with them, and unless they are gratified
to the extent of their desire?, the husband
very often becomes a sufferer in more
ways than one. A Frenchman, however,
cannot resist the fascinations of a French
woman.
and he generally yields to all
her wishes, if he even sacrifices his hap
pinesB in other particulars. A more in
dependent, exacting, diplomatic, showy
race of married women cannot be found.
I The Jiitnperor and Jiimpress, whenever
r . ... 1 . ' ., .
thev appear in public, unless it be on
pe
or's ball is sure to bo ridiculed.
One is
surprised, just now,
to meet
so many
i. 'plain-looking persons in corouetted car-
1 riages in tuo streets oi rans. xc is 10
exert a good influence in
curtng the un-
limited extravagances of Parisian artists
" OIi"u " " Wft D"ai W1J uuvr """Cincinnati, during which he mowed one
hips and the sleeves iare a clean foot of d of g, timotby sg
' ? clTotl The ?nsom ?f "ifying after
in-lthe LoQdon st?le kas been growing con
siderably lately; and it is not at all un
common to see a fashionable Frenchman
carying along-waisted paletot.
Great Pegging Match at North
Danversi On Thursday, August 4th, at Danvcrs,
Mass. Alexander Steele, and John J. Bun-
'ker, on a wager of 8-5, pegged one hun-
a, 'per hour, driving upwards of 35 pegs per j
. while the blood was oozing from their fin-
ger ends, notwithstanding which, Bunker i
penormed tne usual amount or labor on
Ui. - ii ,i
the following day
TllPrn ?a nn ni lo?rr In V!r!n!'i
who
believes it to be a bible-doctrine that,
(for seven -.ears tcfore tn"e ena 0f the
u n0 chHdren ar tobeborn; and that
, . . . , :T . ,.
gives her comfort, for at every fresh birth
she hears of, she says to herself, well the
seven year? at least have not jet begun."
An Extraordinary Man.
uavia Wilson, an oia revolutionary
soM- &ud a J. of Nqw j d..
David "Wilson, an old revolutionary
after a shorfc m jn Dearborn (Jounty
Tml:nnnn a ,,,,?. 1833. nrmrl nn Imn-
j drcd and
, a 1 7 o
seven years,
two months and
ten days. He had' at different periods
cd one week for Esq. Pendleton, of Ham
- ,. nnnni ri,; li,nf.n ',;! v
if I
ETe vas about five feet six inches in bight.
His frame was not supported by riba' as
the frames of ordinary men are, but an
apparently solid sheet of bone supplied
their place. He could hold up his hands
in a vortical position, and receive a blow
from the fist of a powerful man, on the
latteral portion of his body, without in
convenience. He served throughout tho
entire Revolution, under General Wash
ington, was engaged in. most of the Indi
an wars since, and was the companion of
Marion and Eodgers, and of many other
distinguished early pioneers of our West
ern and Southern wilds. Our readers may
rest assured that this statement is correct,
as we received it from Mr. Alexander
Wilson, of North Madison, who is the
forty-fifth child of the subject of this par
agraph. Madison (la.) Banner.
Western Music.
We learn from a Western paper that a
Western chap, who went to New York to
purchase goods, &c, was invited to one of
those fashionable parties so common in
large cities.
He was clearly a western original
but said very little, until he found that
the party wa3 not to close without an at
tempt to corner him. At length, a bevy
of laughing girls, by the merest accident
in tho world, found themselves grouped
about said western green one, in a most
animated discourse upon music; and city
playing. When all this had progressed
just far enough, one fo the damsels, with
head more adorned without than within,
and in that peculiar parlor drawl, which
fortunately no type can represent, accos
ted the observed of all, with
'Do the ladies play music at the west sir?
Original saw the game, resolved to
win 'Oh, very universally, Miss,' waathe
cool reply.
'Indeed! Why, I was not aware of that;
pray do they use the piano, mostly ?
'Never, Miss; the only instrument out
our way, is the Swinctte, and tho girls all
play it'
'Oh' dear, I am sure I never heard of
that before: do tell us what it is, and how
they play it.
'Well: the instrument is a small pig;
and each girl takes one of these under
her arm, and chaos thc end of its long tail,
and that brings the music.'
The preconcerted ' come,' made no far
ther progress; and for the balance of the
evening our western ' green 'un' was the
only lion of the show.
The Hermit of Chicago.
If any trafficker in romance wishes a
hero for a fashionable dish of literature,
we can supply him. On Lake Chicago
there are a number of small and lovely
islands, varying from ten to forty acres,
lying high above the clear waters, and
displaying a level surface, beautifully
wooded with maple and lindens. Upon
one of these smallest islands a young
man has resided alone, so far as human
companionship is concerned, for several
years. Ho has a neal cabin, and culti
vates a few acres of ground with his own
hands, sufficient to supply him with the
necessaries of lifo. He is a gentleman of
education and fine lcterary taste, and has
quite a library of well selected standard
works. He seldom visits the settlements,
but is always pleased to have peoplo to
visit him, paying marked attention to his
guests, and entertaining them in the best
style his domicil affords. Why he has
chosen this seoludechway of life, no one
knows. He appears happy and content
ed, neither a misanthrope; blunted to tho
social enjoyments of the world by mis
fortunes and disappointments, nor a bigo
ted anchorite, nor yet a romantio fool.
One of our city colporteurs in Cincin
nati, some ago, when engaged in distri
buting tracts among tho poor benighted
ones about town, met with an amusing
incident. Coming to an insolated build-
- uunible pretentions, on the common,
he opened thc door without tho ceremo
ny of knocking, saying:
'Will you accept a tract oC the Holy
Land?' meaning the four pages of letter
g hQ had in bis hand The man of
.
,thoh
honso instantly replied :
'Yes, bejabers, a whole section if you
give a good title. But I'd like to know
if there btfmuch prairie or ague there to
bother a poor devil!'
Tho substance of the verdict of a re-
cent coroners jury, on a man who died
in a state of intoxication,' was-7-"deftth
by hanging round a rum shop.
Horses and Tobacco.
N. P. Willis, Esq., gives the following
hint whereby trees may be saved from
being gnawed by horses, from which they
suffer so much in exposed situations, when
used as hitchiug posts:
Strangers will tie their horses to the
trees from which I can least spare thc
bark they eat off, while their masters are
rambling about, and I had just been wash
ing the trunks of two or three evergreens
with tobacco juice, (said to be a sixmonths
disgustcr for the worst kind of crib-biter)
when neighbor S , with his white
locks flowing over his shoulders, and his
calmly denial face beaming from under
his broad b rimed hat, drove down thc av
enue a moving picture among the beau
tiful cedars and hemlocks that made them
more beautiful than before. We tied his
horse to one of the tobaccoed cedars,
which the fine animal, a splendid bay, o
pened teeth upon, and immediately back
ed off to the length of his halter, taking
an attitude of repugnance in which we
found him on our return."
A Philadelphia editor thinks, from the
manner shirts arc made in that citv, there
ought to be an "Inspector of common
seiccrs." The editor went to the expense
of a new shirt the other day, and.found
himself, when he awoke in the morning,
crawling out between two of the shortest
stitches.
Efcw S;ifciy Whiffictroo for Car
liases. A new method of constructing whiffle
trees for carriages, whereby the horses
may be disengaged from the carriage by
the driver, at any time he may wish to do
so, has been invented by Elisha Harvey, of
Whately, Mass. The method employed
by the inventor, is the following. An
additional short whiffletree or bar, is at
tached in tho usual manner to each end
of tho double whiffletree. The arms of
these two bars or levers, are of unequal
lengths, from the place where they are
attached, the short distance beyond the
farther end of the whiffletree, where it
forms a hook to which the single wbiffle
trees are attached; the longer ends of
these bars, extend nearly o the centre of
the double bar, at which place they form
a fulcrum upon a slide bolt or lock, which
passes through the whiffletree in front of
the ends of the bars, and is retained there
by means of a strong helical spring.
When it is desired to liberate the horses
from the carriage, the slide bolt is raised
by the driver, by means of a cord or oth
er covenient device, and thc opposite end
of the bar allowed to swing round upon
an axis at the end of the double bar, aud
thus disengage the horse by liberating
thc single whiffletree from the hook.
Nr. Harvey has taken measures to secure
his invention by patent. Scicntjic Amer
ican. .
An Auctioneer Caught in his own
Trap.
Smith, the auctioneer, is a very popular
man, a wit, and a gentlemam. No per
son is offended at what he says, and ma
ny a hearty laugh has he prolonged by
his numerous sayings. He was recently
engaged iu a sale of venerable household
furniture and "fixins." lie had just got
to "going, going, and a half and a hall,
going," when he saw a smiling counte
nance, upon agricultural shoulders wink
at him. A wink is always as good as
a nod to a blind horse, or a keen
sighted auctioneer, so Smith winked and
tho man winked and Smith kept "going,
going," with a lot of glassware, stove
pipes, carpets, pots and perfumery, and
finally the lot was knocked down.
"To a who? said Smith gazing at the
smiling stranger.
"Who, golly V: said the stranger, " I
dunno who."
"Who, you,sir," said Smith.
" Me, darned if I did," said thc stran
ger. " Why, did you not wink and keep
winking?"
" Winking! Well T did; so do did you
wink at me. I thought you winked as
to say 'keep dark; I'll stick somebody
for this lot of stuff: ' and I winked as
to say I'll be darned if you don't mister!
The Dead. Alive.
A little girl about ten years of age,
the daughter of one of our most esteemed
citizens, was taken sick a few days ago,
and on Monday evening, to thc poiguant
grief of her parents, apparently died.
The usual preparations were made, the
room darkened, and the body enclosed in
a shroud, with the intention of burying it
yesterdny afternoon. But on yesterday
morning the apparently dead girl revived
and terribly frightened at the situation
in which she found herself, with cries a
larnied the household. She is since doing
well. Norfolk News.
A new political party, to be called the
Ameriran party, it is said, is about to be
formed in New York.
jn-Potatocs are selling-for $18, per
bushel, iu some parts of California.
The Scolding Wife.
Our pen trembles in our hand as we writo
'scolding wife,' for all curses and torments
on the face of the earth, this demon is
surely tho greatest. Her horrible temper
has driven her husband long since to tho
tavern, where, notwithstanding the ter
rible penalty he will have to pay for the
association, he meets, at least, with smiles
and jovial companions.
A man could lie down in 4hc swamps
of Louisiana, with a mosquito sucking at
every pore of hi3 skin, and bear it, with
more equanimity, than the everlasting
claclrof a scolding woman's tongue.
What should be her pleasure the caro
of thc household she makes a misery to
herself and all around her and particular
ly to her poor husband, who Has to listen
if he expects peace and quietness
when he comes home to a meal, to a re
cital of all the details of trouble she has
with the servants; how Billcy dropt a lit
tle oil on the landing which she knows
will never come out, and how little Eliza,
being left to take care of herself, whilst
she was looking after the servants, threw
her spools of cotton into the fire, and lost
every needle she had in the world.
Thc husband, anxious to mollify thc
irritation, says :
'Never mind, my dear, let us have din
ner; I will bring you plenty of spools- of
cotton when I come home this evening.'
'There, that is just like you; I declare,
Mr. B., it is of no use of my slaving, and
working, and saving, to make both ends
meet with your extravagant ways.
Heaven know?, your income is not so
large, that you can purchase spools and
needles when mischievous children choose
to destroy them but it's just like you!
What do you care about your poor wife
working her fingers' ends off to make you
comfortable? Not a bit, as long as your
shirt buttons are attended to and your
stockings mended that's all us poor wo
men are worth.'
'But, my dear '
'Don't dear me, sir ; I am not to bo
smoothed down by any of your fine. words,
for while I am about, I will have my say.
j Do you see that, Mr. B.? Oh! you do it's
! a bit of cegar, it is. Well, tm sure
and so, in spite of all I have said, you go
to smooking in the bed-room this morn-
' ing, after I went down to see about break
1 fast. Upon my word, what will you do
next? As though I hadn't worry and
! vexation enough with the servants, with
their nasty habits, but you must add to
! them.'
'D n, it, madam, am I to hava
my dinner?'
'There, that's right; begin to swear; it
is so manly, to an unprotected female!'
'Soup madam!'
'That's right; go on, go on.'
'No, madam, I will go off.'
A very straight (jpat tail is seen dash-
, ing down the street, and, in a few minutes
; afterwards, an anxious, but quiet looking
'gentle man, is ordering ajnutton-chop at
; Victor's, and drinking au uncommonly
strong glass of brandy and water. Mean
time, thc devoted wife is amusing herself
with the hysterics; but the only bad fea
ture is she recovers. IV! 0. Delta.
iHfterciice Between Religion anil
Profession.
There is a wide difference between re
ligion and profession, as to their advan
tages. To bend the knee, morning and
evening, before the God of Heaven, in a
spirit of formality, will avail but little,
cither as to the direction, or consolation
of life. It will not arm us against calam
ity; it will not deliver us iu danger; 4t
will not console u.s in afiliction; it will not
guard us against tho wiles of temptation,
or the frowns of persecution, llcligiou
will do this; but not thc form of godliness.
While thc countenanco of the Christian
glows with the brightness of divine com
munion the mere professor rises from his
knees, with and understanding as dark,
a heart as wavering, a will as perverse,
passions as corrupt, as when he approach
ed the throne of mercy. The first returns
from the closet as a child who has held
an inteacourse with a father, thc sccoud:,
as a blind pagan returning from the tem
ple, where he had been offering a few
grains of incense upon the alter of an'uii
knowu God.
It is hard work fighting a Quaker, ft
is.poor work scolding a deaf man. lib
profitless working beating thc air. One
sided 'VonYr overlies do not last long, aijijl
generally end in victory, for. .the.iolcnt
party.
i I

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