The weekly register. [volume], March 04, 1885, Image 1

About The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909

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vol xxnr.
PHYMCXAZM.
A. R. BABBEE,
(Northwest Cor. flth and
POINT PLEASANT, "
Office hoars from 6 a. m. to
5 to 10 p. m. [ro?j
w**wy ?
Qfllce at residence, on MainbtNtt, Juat
?bovo th? Court: lloiue. ? attend
prompUr to *11. c*lta, *l\cnfr d?y or
nlgbt. When not professionally en
raged, can always U found at hii of
Met. / [Jan. 3,1888.
jjR. a ct. hhaW,
PIJTBlOr/iiAXD SCKOF.Oy,
Tunden hl*,firofe?rioqal ferric** to the
Jiublic, C?n? promptly attended to. Of
Ico, cor.-Main and ThiJd Htroeta, oppo
alto the old Presbyterian Church.
iptm.
TSR. 1. P. CAMPBELL,
PimiCUM AUD. BURGEON,
Tender" ,bl* nrofeaalonal serY'
JMMft
Wmm ' [Jan 3,1883.
DB. T. M. BBOWN7
o*DEN TIST,
^8? (Shepard's Block, 2d St.,)
GALL1POUS, 0.,
PERSONS living out of the city can
make engagements by mail.
July4-ly.
D. W. PETTY,
Dentist,
Point Pleasant
ALL WORK WARRANTED
PBICEB LOW.
Comer (1th and Main, opposite C. II.
dec. lO-'tH-ly
Professions Card.
Tn Whim ilCuncenu: All partial, irre
spective of race, color, previous or pres
ent condition, who nro Indebted, wheth
er by note, account or otherwise, to the
undersigned, or to the late firms of Dro.
Ilarbeo k Neale, Drs. Barbee A McCune,
lira. Ilarbeo & Fravel, and Drs. Ilarbeo
& stone, are once more respectfully and
earnestly called upon to come forward
on or before the first day of June, 1884,
and pay amounts respectively due ine,
at it is' now positively my intention to
eloso up niv long outstanding business.
Stern necessity, pecuniary pressure and
embarrassment mo thus to call
upou old friends whom it 1ms been my
I to oli'-hand will and pleasure to serve
in the past, and to tvhom my profess
ional services nro now as freely tender
ed, and my readiness ever to serve them
in the future us in the post, just at this
"accepted time" to give evidence of
proper appreciation of past favors and
services rendered, bv all coming forward
and paving me by the time above pre
scribed. Sincerely',
ANDREW 1!. BARBEE, 11. D.,
Point Pleasant, W. Va., April 28.
~ ATXORWSYS.
a. simivon. it. n. nowauii. |
SIMPSON HOWARD,
Allurnfyt nI Iaiip,
Point Pi.easant, West Vinwsu.
PRACTICE In tho United States Dis
trict Court, Supremo Court of Ap
peals, und Circuit Court* of the Till Ju
dicial District. [febiVMyl'
JOHN W. ENGLISH,
ATTORXEY AT UIK,
l'oiut Pleasant, W. Va.,
WILL practice in tho County of Ma
son; the UnitedStates District Court
fur West Virginia, and in the Supreme
Courtof Appeals of this Sutto. OIUco in
Court House. (jan 3,188:1.
W. R. GUNN,
ATTOKSKY AT LAW,
Point Pleasant, W, Va.,
WI1.I, practice in the Courts of Mason
County, the Supremo Court of Ap
peals of West Virginia, and tho United
States District Court for this Slate.?
Prompt attention given to the collection
of cluhns. OIUco opposite Court Ilouso.
[jan 3,18S3.*
W. II. Touuxsox. IUsun Wilxy, Ja
TonzLiNsosr & wilby,
Attorneyn at Law,
POINT PLEASANT, W. VA.,
WILL practice in the County of Ma
son; the United States District
Court for West Virginia, and in the Sup
remo Court of Appeals. Prompt atten
tion given to tho collection of claims en
trusted to them. toTAlso Real Estate
Agents. Lands bought and sold.
Address, Point I'lea.-tont, W. Va.
aprtO-ly.
JOHN K. TIM MS,
Attorney at /.air, Notary J'llMic,
Point l'leonant, W. V*.,
\ T" ILL practice ill llioConntica o( Ma
\\ son ami I'miinnt, ami will attcml
promptly toall buniiicMcntriutcd toliim
ian3, '83.
J AS. II. COUCH, JU,
Attorney al 1/iir and Notary Public,
I'oiut 1'lpasiiiit, W. Vr.,
WIX practice in the cnnntlef u( Ma
huh and Putnam. All buaineea trill
recclvo prompt attention. Ljanlt, 1888.
JOHX U. MYKR^, ~
Attorney nl f/nc.
WILL practice in tlio Court* of Ma
Hon ccuntv, West Virginia, ami
In Moiga county, Ohio. Aililrcas at Ma
nn City, Went Virginia, or Pomeroy,
Ohio. inay7-'S4
7;iias. w. pii kIi^,
Attorney at 1/iir and Salary Public,
1)01 NT PLEASANT, Went Virgini*.
J. Office opposite Court Hoitao.
may 18-1 y
TAKE
New jfirt Andes.
Evry WEDNESDAY,
atT> p.m.
FOR CINCINNATI
and
Evry SUNDAY,
at i i. m.
FOR WHEELING
? mn?
PITTSBURGH.
Dec.H-UUfi.tt.'
SF,NI> yonr onlora lor printing to thli
uQiee. Done promptly. Luw prlcti
Onward, With Giant
?WES MARCHII
Leading the World!
DEFYING COMPETITION!!
Cutting the Very Bottom Out of Prices and
Slashing the Very Life Out of Values!!!
THERE IS NO DULL TRADE WHERE LOW PRICES RULE.
XA. N Dt
MERCHANT TAILORING ESTABLISHMENT.
ARE LEADERS IN LOW PRICES. They know not tho words, "Dull Trade." ? While many
Merchants iu our lines of business arc complaining bitterly about their wonderfully quiot trade,
we can truthfully say that wo are busy. Why? Because we have earned tho confidence of the peo
ple, by our honest, square dealings, truthful arguments and polito attentions. Wo hare opened the
eves of tho people, to how they wero boing imposed upon by some of our unprincipled so-called mer
chants, and will continue to do so in spite of the chagrin of our self-styled Boss Merchants. Beware!
Take care! The town is flooded with old and shop worn goods, which are now offered by certain un
principled dealers, at, what they call, low prices. But wo trust you are aware of the fact that shop
worn goods, on which the dust of years has accumulated, is equivalent to the average Point Pleasant
street dirt! and as such, of course, is too dear at any price. Self-interest will tell you to shun theso
so-called "dust" and "dirt" places, and come to a placo where none others but fresh and seasonable
goods arc offered for sale. Do you know why JORDAN don't offer any OLD GOODS? Simply be
catiBe he hasn't any. JORDAN never carries any goods from one season to auother, and this is the
secret of his success.
MR. IlENRY WOLFF, lato with Moorbrink, Cincinnati, is the CUTTER and has charge of our
CUSTOM TAILORING DEPARTMENT. We tako pride and pleasure iu inviting you to come and
inspect the finest display of Merchant Tailoring Goods ever shown in this part of the country. Our
assortment embraces every new pattern and fabric. We shall mako to measure aud guarantee entire
satisfaction and fit, elegant suits, overcoats aud pants, at the lowest possible prices.
GIVE US A TRIAL ORDER.
GUIS JORDAN, Manager of
NEW YORK CLOTHING HOUSE, Point Pleasant, W. Va.
A flovcrncM-IIoir Mr. Evnrlx
DImjiommI of u Uiidiiuu Cuu
didatci
Wm. M. Evarts is a jolly old fel
low, vory sportive at times when it
will do to relax his dignity, and
much given to joking whsn safe
from public observation. In the
magnificent lounging rooms of the
Union Leaguo club, of which he in
prenident, no anecdotes than his
are listened to witii less strain Up
on pationce; and their Jsecnliar
quality is that, through the bo
briety of his speech, the hearer can
never tell whether tho story is to
be funny or not. That in itself
compels close attention, of course,
becauso it won't do to pul up>n
bland smile on tho face whilu the
mind runs to something remite,
since there maybe no place for a
laugh to properly comc in. [t was
Evarts' habit of maintaining a ?e
dato visage that mado his treat
ment of an audacious and self-com
placent young woman effectively
crushing.
She wore tho flaring hat and ex
aggerated garments of an actress,
though she was no nearer (hostage
by profession, as she rattlingly ex
plained, than was implied in being
an elocutionist.
"I have been bald to call on yoti,
Mr. Evarts," she said, "becauso I
felt sure you could appreciate the
services which I could rendor to
your children."
A? ho has cloven of them, rang
ing in aeo from 5 to 30, he felt
bound to lean back from the work
on his desk and listen to any prop
osition that purported to be bene
ficial to them.
"I wouln liko an engagement to
instruct and entertain the younger
members of your family," the caller
continued. "I am very clovor, in
deed, and nm accustomed to recite
for hours ovory day."
"It may bo said to have become
chronic," tho lawyer intorponed.
"Oh, I suppose so," and tho elo
cutionist was radiant.
"Well, now," and hero ho bocamo
apparently introspective, ae he
doos when formulating his long
sentoncos, "tho theories and prac
tices of my housohold, in so far as
they seem to be pertinent to the
employment of an entertainer, in
structor, or wo may say?I assume
I without any misconception or of
fense to your self-esteem?a gover
ness for tho children, aro based
upon the utmost feasible degree of
tolerance and charity, It is in my
memory that wo onco had a lame
nursomaid, whose limp, though it
may as beon rythmic as a eradlo to
the infant in hor arms, was otr
lainly not pleasing to the obsorver
less intimately related to it. And
I recall a coachman of ours who oc
cupied years of sorvico in dying of
a deformity distressing to tho view.
Out in both cases the'misfortuno
ovortook these individuals while
in our employ, as they had come to
us in normal and healthy condi
tions, end wc fell bound to sedate
thorn to thccnd, but I hardly think
that we should fool called upon to
hire a governess already in an ad
vanced state of elocution, who is
doubtless incurable,and with whom
tho most ideal charity would not
demand that \vc should jointly suf
fer."
Murk Twain'* Ctgun).
Like other American smokora,
Mr. Clemens is unceasing in his
search for a really satisfactory ci
gar at a really satisfactory prico,
and, first and last, has gathered a
good deal of experience in the pur
suit. It is related that, having en
tertained a party of gentlemen ono
wintor evening in Hartford, he
gavo to each, just beforo they left
tho house, ono of a now sort of ci
gar that he was trying to believe
was the objpet of his search. Ho
mado oach guest light it before
starling. Tho noxt morning he
found ull that ho bad given away
lyirgon tho snow beside tho path
way across tho lawn. Each smo
kor had been po ite enough to
smoke until ho gut out of the house,
but every one gaining his liborty
had yiolded to the Instinct of self
preservation and tossed tho cigar
away, forgetting that it would bo
found there by daylight. The tes
timony of the noxt morning was
overwhelming, and the verdict
against the new brand was ac
ccpted,
Frcnclier'n WIvc*.
The lot of a preacher's wife is by
no means an easy ono. Sho is see
o?d in importance to the preacher
him?clf. Her incomings and out
going are all noticed, her porsonal
piety, the number of her drosses,
tho trimmings on her bonnet, the
management of her family, are all
matters that the ladies of tho con
gregation make it a speciul point
to comment upon. Many a poor
clergyman has been in greater dan
ger of dismissal from the color of
his wife's bonnet-strings than from
any error of doctrine on his own
part. She must be a good mixture
abroad and an expert managor at
homo, know how to live on next
to nothing, keep a clean and smil
ing faco, visit tho sick and poor
and not ncglcct th6 rich and
haughty. Her course is continual
ly between Scylla and Charybdis,
quicksands on one side, cliffs on
the other. Her fate is indeed an
unonviablo one, and if it Is pro
veibial that proaohers' sons turn
out bad, why lay it not at the door
of their poor, harassod mothers.
It la a foolish idea tosnppose
that wo must lie down and die bo
cama wo aro old. Who is old? Not
tho man of onorgy and pluck;
not the day-laborer in science, art,
or bonovolonco; but bo only who
suffers hia energies to waste away
and tho spring's of life to become
motionUii^
Wonica Id Texas.
[Woman's Journal.]
There are a groat many hand
dome men in Texas. The free, out
door life, with much horseback
riding, gives them good forms, clear
eyes and complexions. There la a
great deal of negative intelligence
and good thinking.
The women among the well-to-do
classes appear to live mostly in
door*. Even in cities very few are
seen on the street or in the stores.
They are not as often rosy-cheeked
as the men, but much oflenor pow.
dered. Living with doors and win
dows open a large part of tho year,
and in houses all the rear that let
in the air on ovory side, it seems
strange that they do not look
fresher. At one place, where tho
railroad missed the town a mile,
and all the stores had been taken
to the dopot, we asked how they
got to the stores through the mud:
"Oh, we never gn; the men go on
horse back, aud they do the buy
ing."
So it is not uncommon to see men
buying dress goods, stockings and
other articles for women's wear.
Geod help is scarco, and tho
women usually do the housekeep
ing in a few rooms, ovory one of
which has one or more bods in il.
Their timidity is so great that thoy
object to two-story houses, "because
tho wind blows." For recreation
many dip snuff and read stories.
Old snofldippers look snuff colored.
Among the poorer classes womon
work in tho fields at cotton-raising.
Hoeing and picking; are dono by
hand, and what one man can plant
and plow, several hands are requir
ed to pick. But raising cotton is
clean farm work. Thoro are no
briars to scratch, nor juice to Btain
the hands. The stooping is tire
some, bat less so than picking
strawberries. Children are valu
able pickers, being nimblo and of
suitablo height. We have soen
littlo girls who bad picked hun
dreds of pounds, with sunbonnets
and mits on in (he hot sun, who
were not tannod at all. In years
when the crop is good wages aro
high, and many well lo-do women
go out and pick cotton. They are
paid by the hundred pouuds.
Good I.alienage.
Young poople should acquiro tho
habit of correct speaking and writ
ing and abandon as early as possi
ble any uso of slang words and
phraios. The longer you put this
off tho more dtllicult the acquiro
raont of correct languago will bo;
and if tho golden age of youth, the
proper season for the acquisition
of language, be passed in its uso
tho unfortunate victim will most
probably be doomed to talk slang
for life. You bave merely to use
the language which you read in
stead of tho slang whioh you bear
to form a taste-in agreement with
the best speakers and poets In the
sountry.
ny a greasy ataln;
de the little hero,
rhiarwdtert
laaoulof honor,
I humanity's b?t.
^g6tl6KW traded,
1 with bis wee bire feet I
t-bflok itOT?d*ith riehea
\ Into tlie rain-Vashed street.
[I cr'ei' he, oa ho clutched it, ; \
bought of bU hunger pain?
>it he paused?but ho conquered,
""'bed a hero again.
bly he aought (he owner,
i?ve up the untouched gold,
III in his heart repeating?
pienBtbouaandfold."
bflMBHi} the gutter?.
?jv"< ?|
Vee, honesty in tbe gutter,
Think you It's never bcon?
Must ermine and silk enswathe it,
Can grandeur improve its mien?
Must tho poor waif in life's desert,
Hungry and cold though he bo,
Have no bright spot on his record
Because of his pedigree?
Honor is bound to no station,
Honesty stays by no creed,
And many a noblo spirit
la hid by the garb of need.
The man of tbe world may marvel,
But poverty's paths are trod
By many a royal hero,
Heart-warmed by the breath of God.
CATCIIUO A WILD HORSE.
Thrilling Experience in
Aorliieru Wyoming.
When I was stationed up in tho
Wind river valley, Wyoming ter
ritory, I had & most exciting ex
perience with a wild horse, writes
Gen. James Brisbin iu the Horse
raan. I had often heard of this
horse, and there was a good deal of
romance attached to his history,
much of which, I suppose, was pure
fiction. Such a horse, however, did
exist, and ho was often sccu on the
plains, in the canyons, and gating*
down at tho passers by from the
mountain lops. At midnight of
ten n horse was seen flying by
the lonely camps on the prairies,
and the Iudians d(.'cleared they had
been scared out of their sleep by
the neighbor clattoring hoofs of the
"phantom horse," as they called
him. Tho Chnyenne Indians had
stolen him in Kansas,tvbero he had
been a noted raco horse, and the
Sioux had in turn stolen him from
the Cheyennes, who sold him to tho
Utes, and in a great battle near the
Uintah mountains the Snake In
dians had capturcd him from the
Utes. He escaped from the Snakes,
and for a long time remained wild
upon the prairies, but finally Mr.
Gallagher and a party of hunters
had succeded in capturing him and
took him to Salt Lake settlements,
but ho had escaped, took to the
mountains, and finally drifted back
to his old pastures on the Wind
river. All efforts to recapturobim
ffhore in vain, and when I arrived
[on the Wiud river he had been at
largo some four years. I knew
Mr. Gallagher well and wrote to
him about tho horse. He replied
there was such a horse, and for a
time be had him in his possession.
Mr. Gallagher's letter revived all
interest in the mysterious horse,
audi determined, if possible, to
capture him at the earliest oppor
tunity. Tbe snake Indians, who
inhabited that region, did not like
to talk about him and believed he
was possessed of an evil spirit.
| They frooly admitted often seeing
him, but would not help to catch
him or have anything to do with
him.
Thus ran lbs legend of tho wild
horse or the pbamntom steed of tho
Wind river mountains, as he vast
frequently called.
I gave strict instructions to all
hunting parties, sCuuts, and trap
pers to look out for the wild horse,
and if they saw him to lot me know.
Once word camo that he was at
Buffalo Bull lake, sixty miles away,
and I sent a party of Arrapahno
Indians and scouts to capture him.
After days of watching they finally
lassoed him and brought him to
their camp. For days they beat,
choked and starved him, but his
braro spirit seemed nnconqurer
able. Ilis legs were tied with
ropes, and the Indians resorted to
all their known skill in horseman
ship to break and conquer him. At
last one ambitious Indian youth
announced he could ride him, and
the ropos were taken oil. Tho In
dian mounted the wild hone and
both disappeared into the hills.
In the evening tho Indian return
ed to camp, foot sore and bruised,
and announced that the horse had
throw'n him and escaped up into
tho mountains. That was the last
seen of blm for nearly three
months, when a trapper on Big
Wind river said bo saw a horse
with so Indian saddle on and a
rope tide to his aador jaw grazing
oft the rivsr bottom, and h? at
tempted to approach him, but he
fled to the bill* like the wind. The
Arrapahoes no sooner heard of thii
than they set oat fof the Big Wind
river, determined to capture and
bring him In. I will here say that
the Arrapahoes did not share the
superstition of their neighbors, the
Soaker, in believing the horse had
supernatural powers, or was poss
essed of a badspirit. They simply
regarded him a horse, and were
auxioua to have the honor of being
bis captors.
In a few days I heard the Arra
pahoe Chief had succeeded in find-,
ing where the horse watered, and,
skillfully spreading bis lariat on
fome bushes, had succeeded in
catching him. He Jwas tied to a
tree, ap^:|?^(^Jwflgon and some
soldiers to Thffp?Wnj him in.?
Chained to the wagon, he was
started for camp, but bad only gone
five miles when he broke the chain
in twain, and once more fled to the
hills, defying all pursuit.
The wild horse was.not again
heard of for nearly three months,
when one morning just after break
fast in mid summer, a sentinel on
post reported a horse on a bind
overlooking tbe camp, and on clo
ser inspection with glassoo we saw
it was the veritable wild horse with
the chain still about his neck. He
seemed greatly excited, kept gal
loping up and down tho bluff with
head and tail crect, steadily look
ing at our horse and mule herd,
which was quietly grazing in the
valley. I gave orders to the Soldiers
not to disturb tho horse or appa
rently notice him, but sent word to
the herders to move the herd gent
ly toward the blufl, keeping well
in the background themselves.?
The horse presently desconded the
bluffs and approached the herd, but
suddenly taking alarm, croised the
valley and assumed his old posi
tion on the hlufls. Boing assured
he came down, and, for a minute,
joined the mule herd. Then run
ning round and round, he worked
toward the horses und mares. As
long as he would run I let him go,
but seeing he waB settling down to
capture our mares, I started him
out on tho hills once more. Part
of the herd was now driven in, a
savalry company and some team
mules saddled up, and wo waited
for developments. Wo could see
the long chain about his neck
dangling between his forelegs, and
apparently threshing them at ev
ory step. In about an hour the
horse, apparently exhausted, came
down from tho bills and entered
tbe herd with tho mures. I now
ordered tho men in twos, threes,
and sixes, to seize the passes lead
ing into tho hills and picket the
blulla. Then began a chase the
like of which I had never scon be
fore. I had sent out troopers to all
the passes, and divided up a com
pany into squads of six and eight,
with orders to relieve each other as
fast as thoir horses beenmo blown.
The pursuing party started tho
horse, and he mado straight for tho
hill?, where he was turned back
and driven across the vnlloy again.
Go whore ho might, soldiers from
every canon and on every hillside
emerged with lariats, ready to lasso
bim. Like most animals wbon
closely pursued, tho horse ran al
most in a circle, and soon made no
efforts to enter the hills. His only
anxiety seemed to be to escape tbe
immediate presence of his pursuers,
who gradually closed in on bim.
At first be easily outran tbo swift
est horses, but now some of the
fresher ones were ablo to keep up
with him. Tbo chain about his
neck threshed-about his legs and
greatly impeded his onward pro
gross. Suddonly from tho wagon
corral emerged a teamster mounted
on a tall saddle mule, aud at tbo
sight of the mule and rider tho sol
diers set up a groat shout. Tho
mule had a history, and was known
iu the command as Old Abo' Lin
coln. He had boen tho hero of
many a race and won a bet, for,
notwithstanding his ungainly ap
pearance, he had pluck, endurance,
and speed, euch as rarely fulls to
the lot of a mulo.
Stretehing himself and shaking
hi? email whisk tail in the air, Old
Abo went straight for the wild
horse. Placing himself on the out
side of the circle at the horie's
shoulder, Abe stayed with him,
pressing in and in, until he was
going around on a few acres of
land. I now taw the capture of the
horso was inevitable, and the sol
diers of tho camp ran out with
guns, sticks and dubs to keep him
within the circle. By common
couset Old Abe and his rider were
allowed to do the chasing, the other
mounted men merely keopingthe
horse in the fatal ring. Abe's ri
der made one or two sttompts to
throw.a ropo pver the horse's head,
but be dodged it with wondorful
agility.
I "Catch bim by the chain! Catch
him by the Cbaiol" the soldiers
1 called oat, *nd Abe's rider put up
his tope and made desperate efhrts
tti get hold of the chain that hung
1 from the horse's neck. Once or
twice he got it, but the horse tore
away. Old Abe seemed to tnlstfn
derstand the builnesa in hand, and
was constantly trying to get ahead
of the horse. He did not seem to
know why he should be required to
keep alongside, and greatly veted
his rider by his efforts to pass the
hotse. At last,however, the chsin
I was secured and Abe either under
stood it or being tired out, merely
kept at the horse's side. As the
soldier.tugged at the chain it be
gan to choke the hone, and finally
, be staggered a? he ran. The sol
rdfcrs now clos'?a i'MttnW tWr
lariats at him as he passed. One
went over his head, and the soldier
hung to it until another came to
his help. The horse could go no
further; his eyes popped out of his
head, his tongue protruded from
bis mouth, and be fell heavily on
the plain. In an instant bis fore
legs were, bound together, and at
last wo had tho wild horse safe'iti
our hands. I exrmined him caro
fully, and found him a dark chest
nut bay in color, and of medium
size. The chain had cut deep into
his neck, making an ugly sore, and
; the skin was completely thrashed
off his knees Und forelegs by the
breaking of the chain. He was
broad chested, with wide nostrils
and a big, bright, fiery eye. The
muscles were gathered in large
knots, and the veins on his netfk
I and body ?tood out like whipcords.
After we bad securely hoppled
his legs and tied a dozen long ropes
! to him wo took the chain ofl his
! neck and iet him go. Ho seemed
I completely conquered, and moved
i along quietly enough to theita
bles. Tho boree was by common
'consent given to me; but I said 1
| would not have hid, and thought
' he ought lo belong to Old Abe and
his rider. This greatly pleased tho
soldiers, and, as Old Abe and his
rider belonged to Capt. Phistercrs
company of the Ssvcnlh Infantry,
tho horse went to that regiment.
Poor fellow, be seemed glad
enough to be in captivity, and was
soon quite gentle, but they wero
afraid to ride him lest ho should
throw his rider and again escape
to tho hills. Ho would put down
bis head to have the sore on his
neck washed, and, indeed, behaved
so well we soon ceased lo talk about
him.
Slccdug of Grant and Bcanre*
gard.
Ii is a mistake in heroes when
ever llioy neglect to bo six feet in
hoight. Two men met in the pub
lication office of a Nbrt York mag
azine, fur which both had agrocd
to write articles. They woro in
troduced to each other, and I
watched them very interestedly,
because they were Gen. Grant and
Gcu. Beauregard. The visibl;
splendors of war bad departed from
them with thoir uniforms, and
their civilian coats were even
glossed by wear in spots where
gold lace once bad shone.
Grant walked heavily with a
cane, never having entirely recov
crcd frota tho hurt to bis hip in a
fall on an icy sidewalk. His hair
and whiskers had the shapes made
familiar by his portraits, but his
lowness of stature was deplorable,
because he was rather Blouohy and
fat as well. He looked more like
a plain, matter-of-fact merchant
tnan the foremost general of a
great war.. Beauregard's head was
all tbat could bo desired by an ad
mirer, for it had closecroppod
white hair, a mustache and imper
ial of the same hue, and tho out
lines of a military model, but he
nesded six inches more of body
and legs in order to inspire any
sense of grandeur.
Did they fall into hoatcd antag
onism, as champions of ooco op
posed hosts? Not at all. Thoy
did not so much as discuss the
struggle calmly. Thoir topic was
Grant's lameness, which he said
bo did not expect to ever get rid
of, and Beauregard's rheumatism,
which ho ascribed to the change
able Northern olimate. Grant in'
vited Beauregard to csll on htm,
and Beauregard replied that he
would be delighted to do so?all iu
tbo manner of men who might or
might not mean it. Thefe wefo
only two remarks which remotely
had reference to the rebellion.
"1 don't see that you have chang
ed much fa twenty years," said
Grant.
"I have .always believed that my
campaigning did me a world of
good, pbyflcally," replied-Beaure
gard. ?
In Pennsylvania 60 lanfuatftt
and diatetfg Hr? ipokta /
Six Tbonmnd Mile* un Hour.
"How mnch Hurt do yon think
it would lake to send 4 cable din
paicb to Scotland and receive
a reply?" w?S asked n report
er by a Weitam Union man. Hav
ing in mind an experience in ibo
interior of Kan mi, when H Wok a
telegram ten hours to rtaeh, bya
roundabout flfrBuit, a place only
100 tfllle* distant, a reply wot ven?
lured, "About ten days."
"Well, that's where you are fool'
ed. Day before yesterday s dil
patoh was tent from Independence,
Mo., to an inland town in Soot
land, and a reply was received in
just an hour and ten minutesi"
"Mulhatton?"
"No, it's ho Mulhatton story. It
ij-ftfaDt. ILwan nnljf.an ntdiniujr
business dispatch; and took its turn
in tbcordinary course of holiness."
"Do such things often happen to
cable dispatches?"
"Well, if thore in not a rush of
burtons, and if the wires are in
good working order, and the man
at tbe other end replies promptly(
it ought not to take more than
three hoars to ({el a reply from art
English or Scottish town. Two
hours and a half is not uftcomfiion
timo, but one hour and ton min
utes is undoubtedly very remarka
blo time."
"How many transfers are nccei'
jarvf'
"This dispatch was sent fioin In-,
depence to Kansas City, from here
to St. Louis, thenco to New York)
thence to the cable office, and
thence to England. 1 suppose
there wore about five transfers on
tbe other side. It could not bavtf
been a long dispatch, of course, but
the timo made Is still remarkable/'
?Kanm City Timel. ? ? -?
Hi! tfiu Hot Engaged.
The other day a California street
matron, just returned from a throo
years' tour abroad, advertised for a
first-class cook, whereupon an in
telligent-looking pig-tail applied
for the position.
"Whatee your namo, John?'1
asked the lady in that peculiar
baby talk supposed to be adapted
to infants and othsr foreigners.
"Wan Lee."
"You tabs loast tlurklee, Wan?"
lisped tho lsdy.
The Chinaman knit his brows
and shook his head.
"0, dear mel" said tho tourist trt
her imported maid, in what is
known here as Mills seminary?
and abroad as restaurant?French,
"what am I to do? 1 can't make
him understand."
"It i? very unfortunate," said
the Chinaman, reflectively. "I see
you don't speak French very woll,
and, besides that, Chittcso and
English are the only languages I
know."
He was not engaged.
The WclNDreMsed Mam
The golden rule in dress is trt
| keep clear of extremes. The well
dressed man nover wears anything
peculiar, and his gitrtoonts are of
the best materiul, one suit costs $6Cf
being prefernblo to two suits that
cost 825 each; and the tnilof's risk)
ho it observed, i* just the samo in
both cases. We are bound to add,
however, that tho gentleman wbd
has but one suit instead of two can
not efcape embarrassment when
it comes to sending bis tfusers to
the shop for the purpose of having
the wrinklos pressed out of thtsm.
The proper cut for ooat and vest is
that which makos them fit snag
around (he wain and lnoioover thtf
chest, as tho polite citizen is thus
admonished at every turn that ho
will not only look better but also
feel better if he stands straight.-1
The Mentor.
'i?i?
TUe Good Old Mother*!
God bless all the good old mnih'
era, I never seo an old lady ait'
ling in the arm chair at her eastf
but I think what dorms hitve pelt
ed into that cheery face without
souriitg it. It may bo that a man
can go through more exertion than
a woman, but at least it remains
true lhat ho cannot without losing
his laughter, his food chonr, his
gentleness and his loco and trust
in mankind or ti?d. Vet huff
rarely do yoo find a frail old moihj
or whose spirit has bet?n worn
threadbare and unlively by what
she has endured. A sweet old
mother is common}* sweot old fath
er is nut so common. As thy day
to thy strength of love, thy riches
of an inexhaustible benevulencff
and hopo and faith. This is mnfe
npi to bo woman's history than a
man's.
m.? ?
A ftorld of tin and sorrow rtaf
ftnos the price of an apple; 'It will
toon be tho prior ol another if ay
I pies continue to go-tip,