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Middletown transcript. [volume] (Middletown, Del.) 1868-current, September 18, 1869, Image 1

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VOL. 2.
no, as.
Organs that gentlemen piny, my boy,
To answer the taste of the day, my boy,
Whatever it be,
They hit on the key,
And pipe in full concert away* my boy.
News from all countries and climes, my bor,
Advertisements, essays and rhymes, my boy,
Mixed up with all sorts
Of Hying reports, «fr
And published nt regular times, my boy.
Articles, able and wise my boy,
At least in the editor's eyes, my boy ;
A logic so grand
That few understand
To what in the world it applies, my boy.
Statistics, reflections, reviews, my boy,
Liltle scraps to instruct and umuse, my boy,
And lengthy debate,
Upon matters of state,
For «îso-beaded folk to peruse, my boy.
The funds as they were and are, my boy,
The quibbles aud quirks of the bar, my boy,
And every week,
A clever critique,
rising theatrical star, my boy.
The age of Jupiter's moons, my boy,
The stealing of somebody's spoous," my boy,
Tbe state of the crops,
The style of the fops,
And the wit of the public bulfoons, iny boy.
List of all physical ills, my boy,
lianished bv somebody's pills, my boy.
Till you ask with surprise,
Or what's the disorder thut kills, my boy.
Who has got married, to whom, my boy,
Who were cut oft' in their bloom, my boy,
Who has had birth
Ou this sorrw-stnined earth,
Aud »'ho totters fast to their tomb, my boy.
The prjwe of cattle and gruin, my boy,
JÜirec.üoas to il ig and drain, my boy, *
Hut 'twould take me too long
To tell you in song
A qua fier of all they contain, my boy.
YVliy any
% graphic jèhcfdi.
Prom (Jody t Lady's Book for September.
Mri, 0. Fogy's Supper-Table Talk.
Mako tho most of your good luck, Fo
gy ; it won't last long. If you had been
born fifty years later, it would never have
come at all. "What especial good luck
do I refer to ; that of marrying the woman
you did?" Well, that may, perhaps, be
considered part of it, since in that connec
tion you secured a comfortable home and
such a supper-table as but few
permitted to enjoy.
sad to contemplate this table, and to
fleet that in twenty years from now such a
thing will be unknown ; its social delights,
its gastronomic triumphs a thing of the
past, a matter of history, a tantalizing tra
dition, a blessing that was and is not.
w "Why so?" Fogy, you take the Pro
gressive Magazine, don't you ? And road
it, don't you. And all the rest of this
men arc
I declare it makes me
IV .
modern trash that is strewn about as thick
as leaves in Vallambrosa? You've seen
that string of articles of Co-operative
Housekeeping, and what do you think of
them? "'Rather like them." Aware, as
I am, of your lack of judgement, I little
expected to hear you make such an answer
ns that. Rather like them, indeed! And
what, sir, do you suppose will become of
society wlion such a system as that is es
tablished ? Let me tell you. The whole
foundation will bo undermined—the whole
foundation, Fogy, and the structure will
come tumbling about our ears. We shall
be ruined—all of us—men and women
You ask what is co-operative housekeep
ing, Fred. I'm afraid if I tell you, that
you and Violetta, especially Violetta, will
be rushing into it with open arms. It's
just such women as your pretty little use
less wife that's going to advocate it, and
make it the ruin of themselves and the sys
tem, too. " But what is it?" Why, it's
Tor a lot of families to band together and
co-operate in keeping house, as if each wo
man didn't know enough to keep her
tiouse and mind her own business. It's a
common kitchen, and a common cdok, and
'a comsaon laundry, and a common dress
bnaker, and A nurse in common, a doctor
in eomiuon, and, of course, a nursery in
-- Think of that ! It will not be
jin existence five years before it will be un
fashionable for mothers to kuow their own
babies. Oh, yes, that's the way to bring
up ohildren ! Whip 'em out of their mot.'î
'er's sight, as they do calves in tho old
'ebuntry, before the little innocents know
enough to nestle around for their natural
aliment. Whisk the sqauller out of the
tray into the general nursery, for its mam
ma has a mission, and that mission is not
to rear up the children tho Lord has be
stowed on hor. La, bless you, no! She's
got a talent for fitting dresses, or for
standing behind the counter in that won
derful and desirable co-operative store,
where goods are to be had at wholesale
price, or for painting pictures, or writing
novels, or studying law, or lecturing, or
-even for visiting her noighbors, or wear
ing her best clothes on the street. No
matter what, she's got a mission, and her
darlings must go into the eo-operativc
pureery, like pieces of linen into tho laun
Mamma has no time to spend on such
little intruders. Bless us, no ! She must
get strong as quick as she can, and be
her mission ; can't waste precious hours
telling ljttje pink toes
pent to market can'
about "this pig
t lavish precious
. .., .1
talent on nurscy rhymes, nor precious love
on baby charms. Women are getting too
useful and practical for all that. Why,
Fred, my boy, I dare say the time is not
far distant when mothers will not have a
speaking acquaintance with their own chil
dren, and when fathers, coining home at
night, and asking to enjoy a romp with
their darlings, will be sent to the general
play-ground to take their chances of the
lot. They may guess by this one's pug
nose, or that one's blue eyes, that some
relationship exists, but a cloud of doubt
will hang over their fondness, for who
could squeeze Wiggins' child as if it were
his own ? Who could overlook a squint
eye, unless inherited from himself? Who
spank a naughty cherub, unless certain of
the ties existing between the spanker and
spankec? I thank goodness, my boy,
that you wore safely through your eye teeth
before these new-fangled notions had time
to prevail. Yes, I am sincerely thankful
that I never was tempted to bring you up
like a foundling. And, Fred, I want you
to promise me that none of yours, if you
ever have any, shall be tawed out like
those poor little things in the charity hos
pitals. None of my grandchildren must
be reared in a caravansery. No, Fred, if
you ever have a baby, I trust its first tiny
ripple of a smile will be called up by your
own fingers chucking it under the chin,
that its first crow of triumph will bo when
it has pulled that handsome moustache of
yours until it made you wince, that its
first uttered word will be " papa"
"mamma," and that it will come and go
by pet names, such as birdie, tweety, lum
py-dumpy, sugar-wagger, mother's darl
ing, father's precious, and the like, instead
of being called by some number, as I make
no doubt they will call them in that co
operative coop. Just think of its being
tucked up in its crib as No. 12 , instead of
papa's pet !
It's enough to break a grand
heart only to imagine it. How's
that? "Don't imagine it, then, nntil
there is, first, a prospect of a grandchild,
and, second, a prospect of a system such
as you speak of." But I can't help my
imagination. I was always imaginative.
I've no doubt I might have easily per
suaded myself that I was an artist, for I
used to paint flower-pieces beautifully
when I was a girl, and, if I had, you
might have had pictures on the walls, but
where would have been the long vista of
substantial happiness down which
look back ? Where tho hot suppers, Fogy,
for which I am so famous, and to which the
relish, the crowning flavor of tho whole
affair, is added in the knowledge that your
own wife ordered and superintended it?
\ ou would not he content with living at a
restaurant, not even if it wore Dqlinonieo's
You might have the same dishes,
or hotter, but the relish would bo absent ;
your appetite would give way ; you might
not, yom'kelf, realize what was the matter
when it would be tho abscenco of the home
wo now
spice. Now, Oliver, what are you hem
ming and humming about, and looking
across at Fred for? " Simply wish to call
his attention to my happy choipo of words,
such as "home spice." Anything out of
the way in such a simile? " Oh, not at
all, not at all. Was thinking how very
spicy some of our suppors had been, not to
say peppery."
Indeed ? I suppose I know to what
yon refer. I musn't open my mouth ex
cept to put food in it, I musn't eat pic
kles, nor drink my te» too hot for fear I
shall say something smart. If I see you
promenading under another woman's win
dow, I must shut my eyes,
coming into my own house, and taking
inventory of my own goods for her fu
ture use, I must be silent. But I prom
ised never to refer to that subject again,
Oliver, and I'm a woman who intends to
keep her word. She's married, now, to
somebody else, and I'm all the better for
leaving oft - pickles on her account. I sleep
better nights, aDd—
"Dou't snore anything like what I used
There's a man's justice for you ! He
snores, and wakes himself up in time to
hear tho echo, and accuses his wife of dis
turbing him, who has never breathed loud
er than a three months' old baby. Which
brings 1110 back again to these blessed chil
dren doomed to be brought up in future
on the general instead of tho single plan—
by system instead of by maternal instinct
—in platoons instead of single file—in the
lump instead of tho grain—by wholesale
instead of by sample.
Some of the whipped cream ? No, thank
you. Thinking of these poor co-operative
babies has quite destroyed my appetite for
sweets. I have grown 60 melancholy
thinking of them, that I couldn't eat any
thing which has been whipped, not even
syiiabub. You need not assure mo there
is no danger of such a thing's coming to
pass. J tell you there is.. I feel it in my
bones. It is as irresistible as tho frost
which will creep on ns next autumn. The
women themselves, poor fools, have willed
it, and what we will we always achieve
sooner or later. Fed in class, dressed in
class, taught to say "goo-goo" in class,
taught to walk in class—0I1, the little dar
lings, how my heart bleeds for them !
Babies ought to go out about that time,
and full-grown people come into the world
all ready to take their own part in life.
" You read the articles, and did not see
anything about a common nursery in
If I see her
Oh, didn't you, though? well, / did. I
saw it looking out of every crevice of those
abominable articles. What! do you think
they'll do everything clso by proxy, and
not that? Is the model dressmaker, and
the model account-keeper, and the lady
physician, add the model clerk, aud the
model cook, and the model knows what,
going to lcavo her vocation, so lucrative,
and for which she has a mission, to attend
to her own particular little pigmy ? Of
course not. Off with it to the chicken
coop. It's safe there, little darling. It
won't fall into hot water, and the
know just what to do for measles. As if
this was all the infant soul craved
ing after human knowledge, looking for it
in mother's eye, and smilo, and voice,
drinking in love with their very—" Milk?"
No, I won't have a drop of it.
it, and all these foilorn little ones fore
doomed to be brought up on the bottle.
Women are rushing on their own de
struction, nowadays, if they only knew it.
I can sec it as plainly as I do the nose ou
your face, Oliver. I could tell them what
they are about ; I could give them timely
warning—but I won't. My day is almost
over, and if they want to make such reg
ular simpletons of themselves, let them.
I don't wonder men accuse them of being
incapable of coming to a logical conclu
Why, I can write the whole ergo
of this independent movement which is
taking place among them.
ism. ])o you want me to work it out for
you? I won't. Let 'em work it out by
hard experience ; it's nothing to me.
Mow, Fred ?
granddaughters that are to be." Well,
there is something in thut, if Violetta will
only remember it and act on it ; but she
will never remember anything except the
number of her dresses and the way to do
her back hair.
The way I argue it out is this ; in the
savage state, women work to maintain
themselves and their noble lords ; in the
purified, cultivated state upon which
arc coming, women will do the same, only
more of it and harder—cryo, high civili
zation and baabarism are one and the
I detest
It is barbar
" For the benefit of my
God gave woman work to do—plenty of
it—all she could do well, and more than
lie gave man, for she lias fewer periods of
rest. Man, with a spark of his Creator in
him, as soon as ho got beyond the savage,
saw that his duty was to do the rough out
door work for his wife, to protect her,
watch over, her, give her tho same chance
for her nestlings that tho bird gives his
mate when he brings food to her. Once,
if some poor shiftless fellow left his wife
to not only watch over her children, hut
to provide meat and drink for them, tho
world cried " For shame 1 ," very loudly at
him. In fact, very few men, except hab
itual drunkards, could bear the jqqd
tempt of their neighbors consequent
such a course.
Now what are tho poor foq]a of women
doing ?. Asking, beseeching, demanding
the privilege of making squaws of them
selves ! Nothing more nVir less. I tell
you, Oliver, it is sq. Don't I know hu
man nature, especially man nature, through
and through. " Ought to, the many times
I have picked it to pieces." Thou what
do I see in this struggle of woman to get
herself into all tho business which has
hitherto belonged to
has a laudable desire, since she must work
anyway, to do something for which she
can be paid, and will be paid fairly." She
hasn't anythiug to do now, I suppose.
"Gli, yes, she works only too hard ; but.
a profitable kind of employment."
Exactly. So, while she takes the
" That she
man :
it is not
fitable jobs off of your hands, nature, I
suppose, is expooted to perform a miracle
—begin creation over again, and set the
men to—
" Good gracious, wife, not
that! we'd rather plough and dig." Oh,
then woman is to do it all. Woman is to
bring forth children, to rear them up, to
keep her own row, aijd to do t\yo-thirds of
yours besides. Oh, yes! that will be a
I'aradisiacal state of society. No reasqn,
then, for lfizy and self-indulgent young
men leading single lives. Oh, no, not a
"They can marry with comfortable
assurance, that so long as their wives can
not only nianago 11 family, but a retail store
or a warehouse on the docks, beside, there
is no need of their over-exerting them
selves. So long as their own little income
koeps them in cigar» and paper collars,
enough ! let them bestride their velocipede,
and spend the afternoon airing themselves
and their graces in the park.
Hitherto it has been understood that
one of the highest incentives for a man to
" do and dare" was to bo found in his
wife and children—to cherish the one and
provide a suitable start in life for the lat
ter. But this is all to go by the board.
Men, like tho noblo Indian, can lay off and
smoke. What's that? " Wish you'd
been horn a hundred years to eomo !" No
doubt of it. There's many a truo word
spoken in jest, Oliver Fogy, and you
spoko one then. It's only another proof
of what I have been saying. Oh, my
sex, my sex! you don't know what a
scrape you arc getting yourself into,
do, you poor little multiple fool, you, as
man that you cannot only do all that
you have hitherto done, but earn tho liv
ing besides. Throw away tho one single
blessing which has made your otherwise
hard life endurable—tho privilege of suf
fering in the privacy of homo. Well,
now, I'll say it plump out, since there's
none hero but us, and it stands to
that it wins* be so —when women go into
tho trades and professions as freely as the
men, they must cease to attend to their
families. Gur mothers and grandmothers
always found time to raise large families
of healthy, happy children. But now two
or throo sickly, nervous little ones are too
much for one woman. And why? Be
cauae of this new idea of progressé von ess
that is taking hold of tho minds of the
women. They want to be
fore, 1 say it, and say it boldly, that in
men. There
one hundred years after the co-operative
nurseries come in, the world will come to
an end. There will be no 1 a'jios
This is what wo
rushing upon, with all our civilization
" natural selection," our
dust," our geology, our steamboats, Pa
cific railroads, our telegraphs by sea and
land, our—" Velocipedes."
O Fred, your head is so full of veloci
pede, you drag it into the most inoppor
tune subjects. You have velocipede
the brain ; if you carry it to such excess
you'll soon have water on the brain, and
then you can set up a mill with your
wheels and your water-power combined.
Velocipedes ! La ! they arc another de
lightful invention ; delightful to the riders,
and very delightful to ladies like myself
who arc not so active as they have been,
to go out for a peaceable promenade
own pavements, and find ourselves borne
down upon in every direction by a lot of
vehicles, tearing and whizzing like mad,
and we hopping this way and jumping
that, more lively than if we were dancing
a hornpipo, and halloed to to " get out oî
the way" enough to drive us frantic, and
as if we were no better than dogs, and
dodging to the right to be run into on the
left, and coming home on a shutter after
llumph ! I'd as soon they'd turn the
hacks and 'busses, and all on the side
walks and bo done with it. I expect every
hospital in the city will be full of mangled
babies and broken-limbcd pedestrians be
fore the summer is over. I'm going to
get up a petition to the mayor to totally
forbid the use of velocipedes on our side
quently no inhabitants.
" star
on our
. " You expect to go to your place of bu
siness on yours every day?" Not if I
have still any influence in restraining your
conduct. Why cannot you go quietly
down in the stage, as you've done all your
life, instead of making a spectacle of your
self, and running tho risk of a broken
nose, or worse—a peck? Ah, my boy,
you needn't tell me tyhy you'yo tlpit great
piece of courtplaster on the bridge of your
I haven't said anything, but I
knew, tho moment you came into supper,
that you'd been riding one of those wild
tilings, and it had insisted on trying to
surmount a lamp-post. Ha! yes, and Vi
oletta and myself were watching you be
hind the curtain when you attempted to
sail by here, yesterday, so gracefully,
which ended in your going down the area
and denting the area door with yopr head.
You got June to pump cold water on your
head, and say nothing about it, and
laughing to kill, at tho top of the stairs,
all the time.
Because young fellows want to amuse
themselves with these great overgrown
child's go-carts, I see qo reason why sen
sible people should bo disturbed,wind set
to hopping like so many frogs wljeu it be
gins to rain, to get out of their way. For
my part, I've made up my mind to licv
budge an inch. The sidewalk belongs to
pedestrians, and, if a bycycle, as you call
it, wants fo run mo down, very well,
there's damages.
" Tell me how to avoid danger?" Well,
how? " Hide one myself, and then I'll
be even with 'em." G Freddy, Freddy,
that's worse than the co-operative house
keeping. We Iiayo iqdeod fajjen on de
generate days, when sons can encourage
their mothers to ride velocipedes. Yes,
that is tho spirit of the qgc. All wliirle
gigs and Catherine-wheels, sputtering and
fizzing, with little real progress,
like to be vulgar—it's not in tho nature of
a Watkins fo be ungeuteel—but I feel like
getting up at in y owi; table, waving
handkerpuief, and crying, "Go it, men;
go it, women ! See who will go it the
fastest. Get out your velocipedes, ladies,
put on your bjfqrcated garments, and
mount your hycycular vehicles, and rqn a
race with the men. Never mind your
housekeeping, never mind your children.
They'll be taken caro of by system.
There's a cook preparing one dish for the
whole of them, and they are getting up a
pateut steam engine that feeds a thousand
babies at once with a thousand wooden
spoons, wipes their pretty mouths with a
universal napkin, upsets the whole of
them with one tilt from their high chairs,
and slides 'em down into tho co-operative
play-house again, like sending a bushel
of wheat down an elevator."
1 don't
*! Don't see any connection between ve
locipedes and cq-operativo housekeeping."
That's because yop're deficient iu logic,
Oliver. Ha ! I oould reason it out of
y°ff, but I won't, not I. You'H' see the
women riding 'em that go in for co
operation, so as to get time to practise
law, so as to earn money to keep their
lords in cigars, and pay their bills at the
clubs. They'll go jn for them, but it's
mighty little time tbey'll get for
sing in 'em, after ihey've got tlio business
on their shoulders they seem anxious to
load themselves iyitl;. Wait till tho wo
men get to making all 11,o living ; then
you 11 see tl;e great warriors smoking their
pipes ip pomfort. Ha, yes ! Tho ladies
of America to-day, wanting to go back,
and make squaws of themselves. For
what docs it matter, whether they plant
the corn, and dress the game, with their
papooses tied to a board in their wigwams ;
or, whether they »ell mess pork, or argue
a case, with tljeir papooses tied in chairs
in the co-operative nursery? Not one
whit, not one whit. Slaves in cither case.
Barbarians, look nt it as you will!
" Always thought I was fast for giving
women proper work, aud proper wages for
doing It ?" So I was, and so I am, Oliver
Fogy-women who are not wives and
mothers, or who, being such, „.
fortunate as to have to depend
own exertions for a living. ~
are so un
on thoir
I say, don't
j yard,
crowd such into the gqtter. Be manly,
and give them an equal or better chance
than yourselves, especially the widows,
who have to be fathers and mothers both,
Don't give them the worst-paid drudgery,
and then hold back a third or a half of
t/iut pay because they are women. I'm
with you there, and beyond you. But
1 in a long, long, way from setting wives
who have got husbands into regular bus
If the man hasn't got the living
to earn in this world, then what has he
got to do ? What's that ?
" Bide a velocipede."
Prc-cisely, and that's what lie'll do;
but it will bo little leisure his wife will
find for riding 'em, I'm thinking, when
she s got the whole world on her should
ers, with her husband perched at the sum
juit, end can t got it off again. It's com
ing to that, now. The Lord bo thanked,
I don expect to live to sec the day.
Where are you going, Fred ?
" 7,° tr y ni y velocipede in the back
a ye
. • . , ,
ty, and has succeeded in attaining it.
Her late contribution to the Atlantic
Monthly, in reference to Lord and Lady
Byron, in which she avers that Lady By
, , , .,
ron revealed to her the secret of her sena
, T , _ , 1
lation from Lord Byron, which secret was
the alleged crime of incest with his sister
Augusta, and which appears never to have *
been revealed to anyone but her, has made
Well, I'll just finish my tea, and then
I'll come out and see if you've improved
any since yesterday. And say, Fred, it's
getting dark, and, if you don't think the
neighbors can see us out of their upper
story windows, maybe Violetta and my
self will try it a few moments, quite sub
rosa, of course, just out of curiosity to
see how these queer things work.
Oh, of course, I wouldn't be
a repre
sentative of my sex if I had not proper
curiosity. I've no objection to
mounting hobby-horses, if they confine
their excursions to the back yard. I dare
say 1 can work that thing without smash
ing iny nose, or taking a ride down the
area steps. Men are so awkward. Poor
fellows, they can't help it. Wait a
ute, both of you, and Violetta and myself
will show you how easy it is to guide a
fractious bycycle. {Aside to V.) Vio
letta, niy-love, any one who can guide and
manage a man needn't bo afraid of
LOClPEDE. Come »long.
Tlie Sfowr-llyi
Sen mini.
Mrs. Harriet Beecher Stowe courts
her the subject of tho sharpest criticism.
Her story, generally discredited, is ofthat
disgustingsort, whfehtho truly refined lady
would shrink fi-0111 having her name asso
ciated with. But Mrs. Stowe lias chosen
voluntarily to have her name forever
eiated with a revelation which shocks not
only tlje pure iuinded of her own sex, but
of the sterner sex.
Tho following commentary by a true
woman is so apposite, that we transfer it
to our columns from the New York World:
A Plcn for Decency iji Literature Mrs.
Stowe Arraigned l»y a Woman.
To the Editor of the Mew York World.
—Sjh: Tho thunk» of all pure-minded
women are due to you for the
which you have condemned tho Stowe
Byrop repulsive sketch ; that it
obscene, catch-penny attempt to revive
a languishing literary fame is evident
throughout its pages.
These matrimonial wrangles
only tho belligerents themselves. What
concern have (Ijo 4>»erican people with or
interest iu the domestic difficulties of a
couple of another generation and another
nation? Simply, none; ft|)d Mrs. Stowe
could oply »waken any interest in them by
appealing to the basest imaginations and
shocking tho finest. Whether or not
Lord Byron was guilty in tho manner al
leged we can never decide; the ipfttter
lies between him and his Maker, apd by
Him he has long ago been judged.
Right or wrong, we owe -Mrs. Stowe no
gratitude for depriving us of tlio belief
that the great poet's love for his sister
the one pure spot in his snd and
manner in
was an
It is very far-fetched for Mrs.
Stowe to quote tho shocking lines in
" Cain" to support her accusation. Lord
Byron's lines to Augusta, to my mind,
refuto the whole indecent story. What
more touching than the following ?
" Though the flay of my destiny's over,
And the star of my fate hath declined,
Thy soft hear! refused lo dise
'Thefaults which
many could find."
And still continue to tiqd even after the
gravo has enclosed him for years,
gross malignity of a woman of another
nation throws tlje rnqst heinous odium
upon him yet.
Where is that eliarity whij.Ii bids
speak well of tho dead—to lot the dead
rest ?
But that Mrs. Stowe's veracity can
hardly he questioned, no ono who kpojrs
anything of English reserve would prédit
the story of the interview with Lady By
ron at all. It seems so juiprohablo that,
after refusing ail her Jife to confide tlje
cause of her separation with Byron to
him, her husband, or to her parents and
friends, she should call iu a stranger, who
not even her countrywoman, and
veal so horrible a tale,
indiscretion, totally at variance with her
previous good judgment, betrays that her
mind was enfeebled by age, and the bab
blings of dotage should have been pitied
and forgotten, pot published, by the
Such an act of
quaintance she unwisely chose for a confi
dante. She made no suelj charges while
either of the two people implicated were
alive, to deny them. What she told Mr.
Lushington may have been anything else
of than what she is said to have revealed to
Mrs. Stowe.
With all his faults, Byron was willing
to bear the blame of their disputes; while
she was not generous enough to make any
one specific charge which might give him
he the clianco of explanation or justification,
For the publication of the loathesome
story Sirs. Stowe has given the flimsy pre
text of trying to defend Lady Byron against
the Countess Guiccioli, but has really cli
cited in the American mind a very proper
contempt for the English woman. The
story should have gone down to the grave
with her, if true, or if only the jealous iin
agiuings of a narrowminded, implacable,
hard, and unforgiving wife.
But, sir, is it not lamentable that the
American public should disouss such a
subject at all ? Still worse, that one of our
loading periodicals should give it place a
motig its respectable pages?
Newspapers and magazines arc read by
our young girls, the future wives and
mothers of America; what morality can
we expect among them if such license
in literature is allowed ?
Does it not show that wo are degenerat
ing in modesty and decency when a noted
authoress can lend herself unblushingly to
the propagation of such monstrous allega
tions? There is nothing can justify her—
the "lifting ofshrouds" could not undo the
evil, supposing it ever existed ; it can ben
efit the American public in qo way, and
it familiarizes the minds of the young with
the most repulsive crime in nature. What
family secret is safe, what grave sacred, in
in these days of pandering to licentious
ness under the hypocritical pretense of
rebuking it? Men may well fcar to accord
any further freedom to woman if they throw
off all restraint of sex, of language, and of
common propriety.
It would appear that no literary
nowadays can hope for any renown if she
keeps to the oldfashioned paths of decency
a »d modesty in writing, She must seize
U p 0n SO me loathesome "social evil," from
whose vicinity and contact
back, and she must then deal with it in
sucl * coarso and bo,J tonus as to disgust
and appal even men, before she can hone
c 11 a. \ i , „ . . „ r
tor any profitable degree of notoriety. Hav
ing done this, Mrs. Stowe may look to have
her lectures well attended. Her celebrity,
* ler position, her talent cause unthinking
w ° m , en f,,llow ' ,ar exaul P l0 ' and gradu
ally her license of language, of thought, of
deed, will be emulated by the now pure.
Women are now allowed to publish what
is forbidben to men.
When "Griffith Grant" appeared in the
same periodical which now publishes the
Byron article, the nation wp,S aghast and
the press cried out ip IjOfrflr; yet bigamy is
a mild crime compared to that which Mrs.
Stowes handles sq doftjy, and ho who
tenuated it was a man.
If men were to write such things as
men do, our sex would foci themselves ad
ditionally aggrieved, and would not liosi
tato to say tl(at they were tryiqjj to de
base us, and overthrow female modesty and
Tlie Amorioan public once thought the
works of Geopge Sands the acme of inso
lent ptfifljgqcy, and shuddered tq think a
woman's pen could be so infamous, 'fhat
is not longer than ten ycafs ftgq, during
which time wo have become familiar with
the face of vice, and have come to the last
stage of embracing her. "George Elliot"
has familiarized us with seduction in "Ad
am Bede" ; Mrs. Wood with elopment and
bigamy in "East Lynno"; Guida with ad
ultery in "Strcathinoro" ; and Mrs. Stowe
with incest.
Murder, treachery, apd foibjdden sins of
every kind form the staple of our house
hold light reading; the fathers, brothers,
and husbauds of the period should see to
it if they wish any prestige of purity in
the girl and wife of the next period.
Very truly yours,
Ellen Kirby.
Tlie Milk}' Way,
T(je Milky Way forms the grandest fea
ture of the fjruianient. It completely
circles tlio whole fabric of tlie skies, and
sends its light down upon us according to
tho best observations, from po less than
18 , 000 , 000 'of suns.—l'ljeso arc planted
at various distances, too remote to be more
than feebly understood; but their light,
tho medium of measurement, requires for
its transit to our earth periods ranging ten
to a thousand years. 8uch revealed to us
by the two Ilershels, who with a zeal
which no obstacle could daunt, have
plored every part of tho prodigious circle.
Sir William Hcrshcl, after accomplishing
his famous section, believed that ho had
guaged the Milky Way to its lowest depth,
affirming that ho could follow a cluster of
stars with his telescope, constructed
pressly for tho investigation, as far back
would requiro 3 : 10,000 years for the
transmission of its light. But, presumtu
ous as it may seem, wo must be permitted
to doubt this assertion, as the same tcllcs
cope, in tho same master hand, was not
euffiuontly powerful to resolve even the ne
bulas irj Orion. Nor must wo forget that
light, our only clue to those unsearchable
regions, expands and decomposes in its
progress, and coming from a point
mote, its radiant waves would be dispersed
in spnee. Thus the reflection is forced
us that new clusters and systems, whose
beaming light will never reach our earth,
still throng beyond; that, though it is per
mitted to man to behold the immensity, ho
shall never see the bounds of creation.—
Manch of Science.
i'ii -
so re
ttülit and lum$r..
Amusing Scenk in Çourt. —Last week
in one of the New Orleans Courts a negro
was called as a witness. The Judge, w 1 h\
is noted for his austerity, held out the
book aijd the witness \yas sworn, and was,
of course, expected to ki§s the bock. But
the witness was unused to criminal pro
ceedings, and entertained curious ideas of
the manner and propriety of swearing, amt
stood epeefc :
"Why don't you kiss ?" demanded the.
"8nr !"
"Ain't yoM, going to ki^? 2r was ftgaii^
"Sar!" repeated the astonished darkey,
evidently mistaking the meaning of the'
Court, and surprised beyond measure at
such an invitation.
"Kiss, I tell you!'
"Yes, sar; yes sar!" exclaimed the.
frightened and trembling darkey, nerving,
himself for the contemplated embrace, and'
without more ado the long arms of the.
son of Ham were thrown around the judi
cial neck, and before lie could be prevent
ed, a stentorian smack resounded through .
the court-room.
"Take him off! take him off!" criec^
the Court, while the loud shouts of tho.
spectators testified tl| ( eijr appreciation of the
fuu. At last, however, tl^c officers p ( f t|pi
court interfered, and the half-strangled
Judge was rescued from the clasp of th,e.
literal witness.
thundered the
A Sentiment.», Yodno Lady on Bon-.
G tho hoquets qf my girlhood—the.
kind I wore fQ school ! | really thought
them pretty—I must have been a fool.
And yet I used to tliink myself on hats q
jaunty miss ; perhaps I was, as fashion
went; but what was that to this? G tho
lovely little pancake—the charming little,
mat 1 ft niftke* iny head so level,- and so.
very, very flat. Oh! a sister's love is
charming, as every body knows ; and a
handsome cousin's love is nice (that is, I
shahid suppose), ; and the |pyo of a truo.
lover is a love that cannot fall—lout tho.
love of a new bonnet is the deepest love of
Marriage of Widows.—T he frequent
marriage of widows seçms to have been,
always more or less discouraged, men be
ing allowed in this respect much greater
liberty ; but St. Jerome mentioned a wid-.
ow who married her twenty-second hus-_
band, he in his turn having been married;
to twenty successive wives. The chan»
pionship appears howeter, to belong to a
Harlem woman spoken of by Evelyn in,
jiis Diary, whose ppopepsity ft.r remarry
ing lpid tq bo ciieckcd by kiy;;—"Site,
had beep mpri-icd to her twenty-f^fth hus
band and being now a widow, was prohib
ited to marry in future."
A few days since, a well-known lawyer,
of Wntcrbury, Conn, bought a railroad,
ticket for New Haven, and after taking 4
seat in the cars, found, on looking over,
his change, th,at the agent had given him,
one dollar too much. He açcojçdipgly re
turned, and informing the agent of hia
mistake, handed back the money. Fpr a,
moment the agent stood speechless ; then,
lie graspeij him by the hand, and exclaim-.
Ofjt "PloMe stand still one moment, sir,
4fid let mo look at you—and a lawyer
too!" ' • • • ' • *
Fanny Fern says: "If o^e-Kalf the.
girls knew the previous lives of the meii
they marry, the list of old maids would
bo wonderfully increased.'■'■ Whereupon
the Boston Post asks : "If tjie men knew,
what their futpre jjyea were to be, wouldn't
it increpsp the list of old maids still fur
ther ?» • ■
In one of Cooper's novels occurs the foK
lowing passage : "He dismounted in front
of the lioijge, and tied his horse. (0 » large,
locust." A French Author, in translat
ing this passage, rendered it thus: "He
desccuded from his horse in front of the
chateau, and tied him to a largo grasshop
"Kisses," gay? Sarp filiej^, "are likq
creation, because they are made out of
nothing and are very good." " They are
also, says the Galaxy, "like sermons,
quiripg two heads and an application ."
A person of experience crystalizes (h«
wisdom lie has acquired in the foUa^ipg
sentence: "Comt&ljjp ig b)j s8 ; jipt matri
mony is blister."
A washer-woman is said to be tho mo6t
cruel person in the world, bocaqijc slje dai
ly wrings men's bosoms.
"Paregoric weddings" are tho latent.
It is the first anniversary after the birth of
a descendant.
"Sie sum.
said an invalid jsreqchnjap
in reply to a friendly inquiry if lie werq
A cynic thinks that tlio school ip which
women study is the academy of design.
When do you sympathize with IrciaiMft
When yoqr heart goes pitg pat.
Good Places for Matchmaking—Sul
phur springs.

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