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jggfSg^jjï^ : |f\ 3 ;^jS> ♦ .] <v *< n Ä fe D A P VOL. VII. MIDDLETOWN, NEW CASTLE COUNTY, DELAWARE, SATURDAY MORNING, JULY 11, 1874. NO. 28. Ärt jo^rg. AT ARLINGTON. BY JAMES H. RANDALL. The broken column, reared in air To him who made our country great, Cad almost cast its shadows where The rictims of a grand despair, In long, long ranks of death, Await The last loud trump, the Judgment-Sun, Which comes for all, und, soon or iato, Will come for those at Arlington. In that vast sepulchre repose The thousands reaped from over j fray ; The Meu in Blue who once uprose In battle-front to smite their foes— The Spartan Bands who The combat o'er, tlie death-hug done, In summer blaze or winter snows, They keep the truce at Arlington. And, almost lost in myriad graves, Of those who gained the unequal fight, Aro mounds that hide Confederate braves, Who reck uot how the North wind raves, In dazzling day or dimmest night— O'er those who lost and those who won, Death holds no parley which was righ-t— Jehovah judges Arlingtou. The Dead had rest ; the Dove of Pence Brooded o'er both with equal wings : To both had come that great surcease, The last omnipotent release From all the world's delirious stings.— To bugle deuf and signal-gun, They slept like heroes of old Greece, Beneath the glebe at Arlingtou. And in Spring's benighted reign, The sweet May woke her harp of pines ; Teaching her choir a thrilling strain Uf jubilee to land and She danced in emerald down the lines.— Deuyiug largesse bright to none, She saw no difference iu the signs That told who slept at Alington. She gave her grasses and her flowers To all alike who dreamed iu dust ; Her song birds wove their dainty bowers Amid the jasmine buds and flowers, And piped with an impartial trust;— Waifs of the air and liberal sun, Their guileless glees were kiud and just To frieud aud foe at Arlingtou. And 'mid the generous spring there came Some women of the land, who strove To make this funeral-field of fame Glad as the May-god's altur-llunie, With rosy wreaths of mutual love;— Unmindful who had lost or won, They s:orued the jargon of a name ;— No North, no South, at Arlington. tbe Grey ; Between their pious thoughts and God Stood files of men with brutal steel ; The garlands placed Were trampled iu the common clod, To die beneath the hireling heel. Facing this triumph of the Hun, 0.1, " Rebel sod " Our Smoky Cæsar jjave To keep the peace at Arlington. Jehovah judged,—abashing man,— For, iu the vigils of the night, Ilis mighty storm-avengers ran Together in one choral clan, Rebuking wrong, rewarding right : Plucking the wreathes from those who won, The tempest heaped them dewy bright On Ukuel graves at Arlington. And when tha Morn came young and fair, Brimful of blushes ripe and red, Knee-deep in sky-sent roses there, Nature began her earliest prayer Above triumphant Southern dead, the dark and iu the sun, The cause survives the tyrant's tread, And sleeps to wake at Arlington. .So i feiert ^tor]). BRINGING ROUND A JUROR. In tbe late coolness between sections, it will be remembered that John Morgan, Brig. Geu. C. S. A , took a notion, with a select party of friends, to make a horse back oxcursion through the Hoosier and Buckeye States. Wo didn't feci particularly hospitable just then to such visitors—we on the north side of the Ohio ; and quickly as the tele graph spread tha nows, every man and boy, able to carry a fowling-piece or a squirrel-rifle, hurried to the ueareat poiut at which his services might be needed to repel the intruders. Fast as recruits poured in they were formed into companies aud battaliona un der officers improvised for the occasion— the writer having the honor to be an or derly sergeant, in which capacity he serv ed for several days and nights. It wasn't his fault, and should, ho thinks, detract nothing from his modicum of merit, that it waa the finest of July weather the while, pleasanter out of doors than in, or that the enemy had tha discretion not to come in bis way. At any rate, he has never demanded back-pay or bounty for his services. But it wasn't a military autobiography we sat down to write, but Joe Duskiu's story, which he told us as we lay in camp ene night. " Boys, did I ever tell you 'bout the lime I sot onto a jury with Bije Bope ? " ■aid Joe, taking a swig out of the com pany demijohn. " No," wo answered. " Would you liko to hear it ? " said he. 11 We may be in our gory bads to-morrow night, an' never hev uuothcr opportuni 'J He was invited to proceed. " Bije, ÿou see," continued Joe, " was jest a leetle the contrariest, overbearinest, orank-headedest cuss that ever ruffled a cemmoonity's temper. He hed Blue bearded throe wives to death, an' hed jest tackled a fourth. In fact, tbe honeymoon was har'ly over—though I guess there was more vinegar 'n honey into it—when Bije aa' a passol more on us was yanked up afore Jedge Grimm to serve onto a jury. " In ev'ry case wo tried we stoed 'leven to one, an' Bije was the one. The jedge get mad at last, and tbraiteDed, in the next ease that cerne up, he'd keep us at it till we did agree. " It wu one of them pesky hoss swap pin cases. Kill Banter'r put off onto Hi Greene a eor'l critter with a false eye an' a artificial tail. The eye was found lay in' into the manger one mornin' an' the fust time the boss got wet his tail oome onglued an' drapt off. " The evidence showed that Hi'd been partio'lar to ax about the eyes, an' Bill'd said the animal had as good a eye as the next hoss. Bill, howsoever, offered to prove that the next hoss to bis'n, at the time was stone blind, but the court ruled that out. " After a searchin' charge from the jedge, wo retired to our room, his Honor fust admonishin' us that ef we didn't agreo this time, he'd make an example on us to all futur' juries. *' It looked like a plain case, most on us thought, an' wo'd strong hopes that, for onc't Bije would listen to reason. But the fust vote we took showed how fur we was out in our reck'nin'. 'Leven on us stoed for giving tho plaintiff damidges, but Bije was unanimous for the defendant, an' said he'd be drot ef he didn't eat his boots afore he'd cave. " Wo tried to argy with him ; insisted that it was a clear case of fraud ; an' call ed attention to the strong pints in the jedge's «barge " But Bije hod his own views. He said Bill'd only said the boss bed a good eye, which couldn't be constrood as menniu' two good oyes; while, in regards of the tail, nothing'd been said, nary way; an' where there was no warrantee, a man's eyes was his market. He Baid that was good hoss-law, an' he knowed it, an' did not care a continental what tho jedge said. "So we jowered over 'n over it tell we was tired, but no use ; Bije still hung out. " When the court let out the judge or dered us to be took to supper, an' then to he locked up toll mornin'. " I dont want to dwell onto tho mise We worried through that night. nes somehow tell court took up next inorniu', when the jedge hed us brung out, lookin' ♦or all the world like so many penny tent tom-cats arter a night's moosicul mison derstandiu'. " *Hev you agreed onto a verdict, gen tlemen ?' said he. " 'No, we heveu't!' says the foremau, sulkin' up. " 'There's uo hurry,' says the jedge, smilin' ; the term 'll lost a couple of wee les yet. The sheriff 'll take you to breakfast uow, and then you may resoom your de liberations.' "Arter breakfast we felt a little pearter, and some on us picked up heart to make another set at Bije ; but ho was head stronger 'an ever, an' said we'd ought to he ashamed on ourselves, so we'd ought, to take advantage o' numbers to bully an honest man's conscience. " While we was at breakfast, the fore man 'd managed to get hold o' the couuty paper, which had jesl cornu out that moru iu', aud to while uway tho timo, he bogau to read it. " ' H alio ! ' says ho ; * what's this ? ' " ' What's what?' says we. " 'Listen here,' says ho, proceedin' to read : "'Startling Rumor. —Tbo town is greatly excited this morning by the ru mored elopement of Mrs. B., the wife of a prominent citizen. 8he took advantage, it is said, of her husband's absence on public duty, to carry out her plau. A marked feature of the affair is that the lady has scarcely been married a month.' " ' What's that!' screeches Bije Bope, in an outburst o' terror. it and and a to un or that the or to has for the " he. " The foreman read it over again slowly an' solemn. Now Bije was as jealous as that 'ere dark complected ohap iu the play. Besides there wa'n't no other Mrs. B. in the place lately married, an' there was the circumstances of the husband's absence ou public dooty. Bije had no doubt that the Mrs. B. allooded to was his own wife. " ' Let me out!' he yelled, runnin' full butt at the door. " • Not till you agreed onto a verdie', says the bailiff, through the key-hole. " * I—I—-I'll agree to anythiug ! ' splutters Bije. hurry, gentlemen—a thousand dollars damidges, if you like!' " We said we thought that was reethcr high. " ' Anything, so it's done quick!' he gasped, iu ng'uy. " We could hardly keep him from jumpin' out o' the winder, while some on us pretended to dicker about the amount we should bring in, jest to torment him. " At last ev'ry thing was fixed, an' we weut into oourt, give in our verdie' an' was dooly discharged. " Bije was rushin' out on the double quick, with murder in his eye, when the foreman stopped him. " ' I think you're lab'rin' onder some mistake, Mr. Bope,' says ho; ■ that there piece J read, you see, '» took from a Cali fornia papar, an' must be, at least a month old.' was a jest a " Bije went off lookin' oheap an' sheep ish. He sent in an excoese next day, an' got let off for the balance o' the term, an' precious glad wo all was to get rid on him. A Numistmatist Nonplussed. —"A numismatist," says the Uaulois "had ta ken a cab a few days back, and after pay ing the fare discovered that he had inadver tently given the driver a ooin of the great ■ Please to return me that the at est antiquity, pieco,' he said to the man, ' for it is 2,000 years old.' 'Nonsense! said the other ; ' you must be jesting, since we are only in 1874.' " Lord Byron. Byron had not damaged his body by strong drinks, but his terror of getting fat was so great, that he reduced bis diet to the absolute point of starvation. He was of that soft, sympathetic temperament which it is almost impossible to keep with in a moderate compass, particularly as in his case his lameness prevented his taking exercise. When he added to his weight, even standing was painful, so he resolved to keep dews to eleven stone, or shoot him self. He said everything he swallowed was instantly converted into tallow, and deposited on his ribs. I remember one of his old friends saying, "Byron, how well you are looking ?" If he had stopped there it would have been well, but when he addod, " You are getting fat," Byron's brow reddened, and his eyes flashed. "Do you call getting fat lookiug well, as if I were a hog?" and, turning to me, he mut terod, "The beast, I can hardly keep my hands off him." The man who thus of fended him was the husband of the lady addressed as "Genevrn," and the original of his "Zuleika" in the "Bride of Aby dos." I dou't thiuk he hnd much appetite for his dinoer that day, or for many days, and never forgave the man who, so far from wishing to offeud, intended to pay him a compliment. He would exist ou biscuits and soda-water for days together ; thou, to allay the eternal hunger guawing at his vitals, he would make up a horrid mass of cold potatoes, rice, or greens, del uged in vinegar, aDd gobble it up like a famished dog. On either of these unsav ory dishes, with a biscuit and a glass or two of Rhino wine, he cared not how sour, he called feasting sumptuously. Upon my observing he might as well have fresh fish and vegetables, instead of stale, he laughed, and answered, "I have an ad vantage over you—I have no palate. One thing is as good as another to mo."— "Nothing," I said, "disagrees with the natural man; he feasts and gorges, his nerves and bruins dou't bother him ; but if you wish to live—" "Who wants to live ?" he replied ; "not I. The Byrons are a short-lived race on both sides, father and mother; longevity is hereditary; I am nearly at the eud of my tether. I don't care fur death ; it is her sting ! I can't bear pain."— Trtlaicney's Last Days of Shelley mal Byron. Crawling Out, A correspondent writes : " It is or.c of the few amusing things on ship-hoard, as the steamer ploughs her way into tho green waters of the channel, as the sailors make merry over polishing the brasses and paiuting the wood-work, ns tho gulls lly about, aud the treeless, barren, isle dotted coast of Ireland is upon every side, giving up its dead, but the staterooms giving up their almost dead. They come out as toads come out, blinking to the unaccustomed light of day, sallow, heavy-eyed, weak limbed sufferers, who feel that thoy have been snatched from the jaws of death, aud are yet hardly in a condition to be decent ly grateful for the snatching. To one who has been 90 blissfully happy as uot to come under the power of the awful mnf ile-mer it must he laughable to see these subjects of a recent resurrection eye each other furtively, as they do. each with an unutterod lie in the expression of his gaze. ' Oh, no ! I haven't thought of being sick. I only stayed below to read my Bible, or because I didn't want to get tauned; that's Oh, no! / wasn't sick iu the least; but I see the eld fellow has used you pret ty roughly.* This from the masculine in valid ouly; not from the feminine, who is never so sensitive to the disgrace of hav ing been routed by the common enemy as the lord of creation is. It is often the case that passengers who have had rooms in the same corridor, who are miuistered to by tho same steward or stewardess,who listened to each other's groans by night, and participated iu each other's sweet sea sons of upheaval by day, and who become as familiar, in the ten or twelve days of the passage, with the sound of each other's voices as with the tones of the mother who bore them, look upon each other for the first time just as the ship goes over Liver pool bar." to see, not exactly the a all. An Astonishing Pony.- Yesterday, says a Southern Colorado exchange, we saw a man, a woman, a good-sized boy, two babies, five or six blankets, a buffalo robo, and two strings of chili on a single pony. Every available inoh from his ears to the root of his tail waa "taken, poor animal was very small, thin as a tow el rack, of a sickly pale color, and one foreleg was about five inches shorter than the other—the knae joint of that leg was very large, so we supposed that the miss ingjpart of the leg was driven there by tho weight above, so that when it was relieved tbe leg would stretch out again like a tur tle's head. In fact, all his legs wero short, aud the crookedcst convention of legs that we ever saw. Incredible as it may seem, the wiry little animal passed us on a trot. When ho came down on that short leg, and the family "kerplumped" with it, it would have made tho oldest man living laugh. Both tho children were sleeping Boundly, for tho motion of tho horse served all the purposes of a cradle— Deuter (Cul.) Ae ic s. The A Duluth paper says one of the streams running into Lake Superior, from the North, is called "Temperance lliver," be cause it is the only one of all tho tribu taries of the lake that has no bar at its mouth. The Blue Laws. Connecticut Two Hundred Years Ago. The Hartford Times republishes an epi sode of the " Blue Laws " of Connecticut, which it explains are not " Connecticut" laws, but were enacted by the New Haven colony known as the " Dominion of New The reason of these regulations being called " blue" laws, original copies were printed on blue paper. Some of them sound very odd to modern ears as follows : Whosoever says there is no power and jurisdiction above and over the dominion, shall suffer death and loss of property. No one shall be a freeman or give a vote unless he be converted and a mem ber of the churches allowed in the do minion. Euch freeman shall swear by the blessed God to bear true alliance to this dominion, and that Jesus is the only king. No Quaker, no dissension from the es tablished worship of this dominion, shall be allowed to give a vote for tha election of magistrates or any other officer. No food or lodging shall bo offered to Quaker, Adamite or heretic. If any person turns Quaker he shall be banished and not suffered to return but on pain of death. No priest shall abide in the dominion ; he shall be banished and suffer death on his return. Priests may be seized by any ono with out a warrant. No one shall run on tho Sabbath day or walk in his garden, or elsowhcre, except reverently to and from meeting. No oho shall travel, cook victuals, make bods, sweep houses, cut hair or shave on the Sabbath day. No one shall kiss her children on Sab bath or fastiug days. The Sabbath shall begin at sunset on Saturday. Every ratable person who refuses to pay his proportion to support tho minister of the town or parish shall be fitted by the court £ül -Ils. every quarter until ho or she pay the rate to the minister. Whosoever wears clothes trimmed with gold or silver above Is. yard shall bo pre sented by the grand jurors, anil the select men shall tax the offender £300 estate. A debtor in prison swearing he has no estate shall be let out and sold to make satisfaction. No one shall rend common prayer books, keep Christmas or set days, eat mince pies, dance, play cards, or play any in strument of music except the drum, trum pet or jewsharp. Every male must have his hair cut round according to his cap. When oue considers that but a little more thau two centuries have elapsed since these were a portion of the law gov erning what is uow a part of the State, it is a matter of surprise that men believing in freedom of conscience and individual liberty should have submitted to them.— Oue hundred years later their descend ants precipitated a seven years war rather than submit to a technical infringement on their personal rights. Havou. that the Taking tlie Near Cut. A boatman on the Mississippi river tells tho following rich oue:—"A poor chap was going down the river in a dug out, and had been iuforiued of a certain locality called Kick's Bend, which is about eighteen miles around, and iu oue place is about a hundred yards across — He was advised to land at the narrow point and drag his craft over, but he passed the spot, going down without ob serving it, and paddling 011 eighteen miles arouud, he struck it ou the other side.— Latidiug at onee, he dragged his b »at across, and weut gliding along down with a light heart, till he camo along within a few paces of the spot where he had drag ged across before. Thinking it was a new cut off, ho went ashore aud tugged his boat over again. When he got hack to the river a second time he saunterc round a littlo to stretch himself, aud so. discovered an old newspaper, out *. which he had taken his breakfast that morning. It was now about sundowu, and ho had paddled about thirty-six miles without any fiutteriug progress, ho scut tied his dugout with a hatchet, built a camp aud waited six days fur a steam Help. —An old Scotchman was taking this grist to mill in sacks thrown across the back of his horse, when tho animal stumbled, and the gruin fell to tho ground. He had not strength to raise it, bciug an aged man, but he saw a horseman riding along, aud thought ho would appeal to him for help. But the horseman proved to be the nobleman who lived in the cas tle hard by, and the farmer could uot muster courage to ask a favor of him. But the uoblemau was a gentleman also, and, not waiting to be asked, he quickly dis mounted, and between them thoy lifted the grain to the horse's back. Johu—for ho was a gentleman too—lifted his Kil marnock bonnet and said : " My lord, how shall I ever thank you for your kind ness?" "Very easily, John," replied the nobleman. "Whenever you see an other man in the same plight as you wore in just now, help him, aud that will be thanking me." A gentleman having a deaf servant was advised by a friend to dischargo her.— " No," replied that gentleman, with much good feeliug, " that poor creature would never hear of another situation." The Comet. A Curious Pleasure Excursion* This is to inform the public that in connection with Mr. Barnum I have leas ed the comet for a term of years ; and 1 desire also to solicit tho public patreuage in favor of a beneficial euterpriso which we have in view. We propose to fit up comfortable, and even luxurious, accommodations in the comet for as many persons as will honor us with their patronage, and make an ex tended excursion among the heavenly bodies. We shall prepare 1,000,000 state-rooms in the tail of the comet, with hot nud cold water, gas, looking-glass, parachute, umbrella, etc., in each. We shall have billiard-rooms, card-rooms, music-rooms, bowling alleys, and many spacious theatres and free libraries ; and on the main deck wo propose to have a driving park, with upwards of 10,000 utiles of roadway in it. DEPARTURE OF THE COMF.T. The comet will leave New York at 10 P. M. on tho 20th inst. No dogs will be allowed on board. This rule has been made iu deference to the existing state of feeling regarding these auimuls, and will be strictly adhered to. A substantial iron railing will bo put all around the comet, and no one will bo allowed to go to the edge and look over, unless accompanied by either my partner or myself. THE POSTAL SERVICE will bo of the completes! character. Of course the telegraph, and tho telegraph only, will be employed, consequently, friends occupying state-rooms, 20,000,000 aud even 30,000,000 miles apart, will be able to send a message aud receive a reply inside of eleven days. Night messages will be half rate. The whole of this vast postal system will be under the personal superintendence of Mr. Hale, of Maine. •Meals served at all hours. Meals served iu the state-rooms charged extra. We shall take with us, free of charge, A GREAT FORCE OF MISSIONARIES, aud tiled the true light upon all the celes tial orbs which, physically aglow, are yet morally in darkness. Suuday-schools will bo established whenever practicable. Compulsory education will also be intro duced. Tho comet will visit Mars first, and then proceed to Mercury, Jupiter, Venus aud Saturn, l'artios connected with tho government of the District of Columbia and with the former city government of New York, who may desire to inspect the rings, will bo allowed time and every facility. Every star of prominent magni tude will be visited, aud time allowed for excursions to points of interest inland. Clothing suitable for wear in the sun should be provided. Our programme has been so arranged that we shull seldom go more thau 1U0,000,000 of miles without stopping at some star. This will neces sarily make the stoppages frequeut, and preserve the interest of the tourist. Bag gage checked through to any point on the route. After visiting all tho most celebrated stars and constellations in our system, and personally inspecting the remotest sparks that oven the moat puwerful telescopes can now detect iu the firmament, wo shall pro ceed with good heart upon ! .Î 11 Larth to Urauua, including dsits to the Suu and Moon, aud all priu ; pa* P lau< ts *■>»0 route, will bo cliarg 1 afc tae ow rate 3" ^ or cver y * r, 0i 000 ' 00 .° milcs of . actuul travel - . This oew an ^ " m thorough ropair, aud is D0W ou her firft voyage. Sho is cou f essc( Hy the fastest on tho line. makes 20,000,000 miles a day, with her present facilities ; but, with a picked American crow and good weather, we aro confident wo can get 40,000,000 out of her. Still we shall never push her to a dangerous spend, and we shall rigidly pro hibit racing with other eomots. Passen gers desiring to diverge at any point or return will bo transferred toother comets. We make close connections at all princi pal points with all reliable lines. Safety It is not to bo A STUPENDOUS VOYAGE, of discovery among tho countless whirling worlds that make turmoil iu the mighty wastes of space that stretch their solemn solitudes, their unimagiuablc vastness bil lions upon billions of miles away beyond the fariherest verge of telescopic vision, till by comparison the little sparkling vault we used to gaze at on earth shall seem like a remembered phosphorescent flash of spangles which some tropical voy ager's prow stirred into life for a single instant, and which ten thousand seas and tedious lapse of time had since diminished to au incident utterly triiiil iu his recol lection. Children occupying seats at the 'Irst table to be charged full faro. FIRST-CLASS FARE Sho be depended upon. can denied that the heavens arc iufested with OLD RAMSHACKLE COMETS that have not been inspected or overhaul ed in 10,000 years, and which ought long ago to have been destroyed or turned into hail barges, but with these wo have no connection whatever. Steerage passengers not allowed abaft the main hatch. Complimentary round trip tickets havo been tendered to General Butler, Mr. Shepherd, Mr. ltichardson, aud other eminent gentlemen, whoso public services have entitled them to the rest and relaxa tion of a voyage of this kind. Tho eutirc voyage will bo completed, and tho passengers landed in New York ae»in on the 14th of December, 1991.— This is at least forty years quicker than any other comet can do it in. Nearly all 1 the back pay members contemplate mak ing the round trip with us in case their constituents will allow them a holiday.— Every harmless amusement will be allow ed on beard, but no pools permitted on the run of the comet—no gambling of any kind. All fixed stars will be respected by us, but such stars as seem to need fix ing we shall fix. If it makes trouble we shall be sorry, but firm. Mr. Coggia having leased bis comet to us, sho will no longer be called by his name but by my partner's. For further particulars, or for freight or passage, apply on board, or to my part ner, but not to me, since I do not take charge of tha comet until she it under weigh. It is necessary, at a time like this, that my mind should not be burden cned with small business details. is I Mark Twain. An audacious trick, says tbe Court Journal, was latoly played by a " sneak thief" at a London club. He entered the hall without attracting the notioe of the porter, and proceeded to empty tbe pock ets of the great-coats ho found ranged in a corridor. While selecting a few of tbe best, be was interrupted by a member, who, iu astonishment, asked him what be was doing. " Oh, this is my regular bus iness," be said. " I am employed to clean ibe gentlemen's coats in several clubs. I take all ef the grease out of their collars." " Indeed." said the gentlemen, interested, thiukiug be bad got hold of ono be could turn to account, " llow long do you take?" "Why, I will be back with these in an hour. " If so, you may ns well take mine," said the member, adding his coat to the heap, and escorting the " sneak thief" past the porter. " What great conveniences you have in London," remarked this country gentleman to a group of his friends. " I have just giveu my coat to a man I found in the corridor, who cleans ooats for the club." " To whom, do you say?" cried two or three. " To the man L found carrying the coats out. Wait—I have his card." Hut the knowing ones did not wait ; they hurried out to find the pockets of some great-coats empty, and other coats altogether gone. Naturally Induisant. — Messrs. E<U s : Allow me to express my disgust at tho bow issues of tho ten-cout and twenty five-cent scrip, and the errors into which an honest man may he inveigled by their close resemblance in size and to tho now fifty-cent scrip, point: On Saturday I bougnt twenty cents' worth of something somewhere, and tendered a dollar hill in payment. The storekeeper gave me in change ono ten cent and one twenty five-cent scrip and ono five-ccnt nickel, and thinking I had got two fifty-cent scrips aud a nickel, thereby being twenty-five cents 'in,' I hastily stuffed the money into my vest pocket lest the trader should discovor his mistake before I got clear of his store. An hour later, when I found I had only received forty cents in chauge instead of the eighty I was entitled to, I went hack and the storekeeper would uot make up the difference, saying 1 should have look ed at my change before I left tho store. Some people will never learn that 'honesty is the best policy,' and that storekeeper is oue of 'em. t( appearance A case iu a Don Piatt as a Historian.— When William the Conqueror completed his con quest of England, his first royal odict was that every Englishman should ride iu a hansom aud wear a stove-pipe for a hat. These were marks of national servitude. After generations they camo to be habits, aud the hat spread over Europe, hansom, however, stuck to England. An attempt to introduce it iu France once brought on a revolution. All the French pulled their shirts outside their panta loons ami sang tho " Marseillaise." To attempt its introduction iu this couutry would dissolve the Union. This is a strong expression, for our Government has created and sustained a carpet-bagger, aud a hansom is a dumb instrument, of torture while a carpet-bagger is a devil.— Washington Capital. The Old Maids. —The Now York Ledger comes to the rescue of old maids as fel lows : "Shriveled and withered you say they Men and women grow old and gray, whether married or single ; but many an old maid lingers to-day on this mundaue sphere who would have died long ago, an unhappy, but popular, admired wife, had sho consented to marry some man whom she did uot love, but did despise, and said 'Yes,' where conscience and God arc : com manded her to say ' No.' Long live old maids, aud let no woman, for the fear of becoming one, wilfully and deliberately sacrifice herself. It is the next crime to suicide." A train running at a moderate rate, which is about 21 miles per hour, would run over a distance of 500 miles per day of 21 hours, and at that speed would reach Britiah India from London in about eight and a halt days —or Pekin in China in 11 days—or from Gribraltar to the Cape of Good IIopo in 10 days—or, from Quebec to Capo Horn iu 17 days—or once round the globo in 51 days—or seven times round tho globe in one year—or a distance equal from the earth to the moon in about 1G months—or from the earth to the sun in 500 years, which is 95,000,000 of miles. " He handled his gun carelessly and put on his angel plumage,'# is the latest Western obituary notice. The Prohibitory Liquor Law. We at length reaohed the hotel again, and I proposed a glees of brandy nud wa ter. My friend looked at me aud then at the landlord; and then the landlord look od at uiy friend and then at me. Per plexity overspread the countenance of both. "Such a thing as a drop of liquor is not to be had in the place," said the landlord. "Bought, you mean,''retorted my friend*. "Bought, I mean," was the aoswer. Then both eyed me significantly. "Does anybody give it away?" I in quired, greatly puzzled by the mystery that appeared on both their countenances. "Not exactly. You see, tho State constables would be after me in no time if I sold liquor," explained tbo landlord. "Do you wuut some very badly?" I could not explain how badly I want ed it, and could ouly give vent to my feel ings in a sigh. Without a word, the landlord disappear ed within the recesses of a small room be hind the offico desk, and presently forth with tv. o empty tumblers in his baud. These he pluced upon the desk. "But where is tha liquor?' I inquired. "Tho law forbids me to sell it," he said, "and I dare not disobey the law. If you can find any here you are welcome to it," saying which he accidentally turned back the breast of his coat. The neck of a bot tle peeped forth from tho inside pocket. Ho winked his eye at me, and I winked my eye at him, aftei which 1 drew for the bottle. He faintly struggled with mo to prevont the during robbery upon which I was bunt, but I proved inexorablo. "My private bottle kept for medicinal purposes, and nut for sale," he moaned, as he poured out the liquor for myself and the worthy chairman of the parish mitte«. "Have some water, gentlemen?" he added with alacrity. We drank, and I replaced the bottle in tho repository whence I had taken it.— Then I put a dollar in his hands. "What is this fur?" ho asked, as ho de posited it iu his waistcoat pocket, and gave me a half dollar in chonge. "For a bushel of oats," 1 answered.— "Keep them ti l I send for them." "Ah, sir," said the landlord, with air of virtuous resignation, "the prohibi tory law has done a world of good in stop ping the sale of liquors, on us, but it's a good ono ."—Boston Gazette. camo coiu an It's a sevt re luw Tiio Oldest Town in Pennsylvania. Chester is the oldest town in Pennsylva nia. Tho titles of its town lots extend back through tha ownership of Europeans and their descendants to 1015. A villugo of considerable size existed there in 1GGU,. at the time of tho founding of Philadel phia, containing house, schools, places of public worship, a flour mill and several taverns. It is well known that Penn iutended locating his city there, hut was prevented mainly by the fear that it might preve to he withiu the limits of Lord Baltimore's domain.— There is good reason to suppose that this fear was not without foundation, and more thau that, that tho removal to the mouth of the Schuylkill did not mend the matter. It is shrewdly suspected that nothing but Penn'» influence at Court saved him from holding his grant under Lord Baltimore, if at all, up to a line considerably north of Philadelphia. Chester was the seat of government of tho Colony of Pennsylvania for several years. It continued to he the seat ®f jus tice of Chester county until 1788, when West Chester deprived it of that honor.— This event was immediately followed by a division of the county, when Chester be came the seat of justice of tho new county of Dulaware, and reinaiuod so until 1850. At that period tho courts and records removed to Media, a point five miles inland about the middle ef tho couuty, the pres ent seat of justice. After the establishment of Philadelphia, Chester gradually decliued iu importance, if not in population and exteut. For a century and a half, nothing hut its court house distinguished it from Marcus Hook, its neighboring fishiug town. Long sinco the commencement of tho present century, its inhabitant» consisted of three or four taveru-keopers, a doctor, a few dozen fish ermen, two country storekeepers and a cus tom -housa officer, whose arduous duties consisting of signing a receipt for his small salary four times a year. market house, court wero A Sailors' Opinion of a Comet. —Wo wero told by a celebrated naval officer the following auecdote ; On one of h s cruises the sailors saw acomot aud W6re somewhat surprised and alarmed at its appearance. Tho hands met and appointed a committee to wait upon the commauder and ask his opinien of it. They upprouched him aud said : 'We want to ask your opinion, your bouor.' 'Well, my boys, what is it about?' 'We waut to inquire about that thing up there ?' 'Now, before I answer you, let mo know what you thiuk of it?' 'Well, your honor, we have talkod it all over and we think it is a star sprung it leak .'—London la tter. A well-dressed Dauburian, while at a recent fair quizzingly observed to a strap ping girl " from tho country " This is a very fine fair we aro having," and was courteously met with the following re buke: " Well, it is none of your damned business if we are."